#my paint can be inconsistent even when I DO keep track of how I'm mixing. so I'd have to paint the base color all at the same time.

[bukuoshin]

Btw, my Arnold Palmer hairpin I'm making is so bad that I feel like I should pen a formal apology to the man himself.

Check it out 👇

Extremely simian-like... Idk how I did this nor how to fix it. Oh, well! He will just be extremely simian-like, I fuckin guess.

[steakout-05]

ok as an artist i personally find traditional painting to be. really really annoying. like. i do not have the patience for it and i just find it to be really frustrating to set up and actually do and i end up not liking the results. i find that there's little room for mistakes and trying to fix them usually ends up with me making 50 other ones, paints can be so inconsistent and having to rely on availability and certain brands to continue making the paint is really inconvenient, not to mention expensive. spending a bunch of time trying to mix the right shade of paint, only for it to go down a completely different shade of colour and not being able to do anything about it is so frustrating as someone who likes consistency and having things just, y'know, not change colour as soon as it dries. plus, they all use different chemicals and can go off really easily or change textures and i am just not ok with having all my materials having an expiration date like food. lead and graphite pencils just don't do that and they can last for years, they're more reliable. every paint is drastically different and trying to find the right one is not only time consuming but, again, expensive, and i don't even see the point in experimenting when most of my materials end up not even getting used if i don't like using them. plus, i'm just.... really impatient. waiting for paint to dry sucks and is why i much prefer digital or just drawing something because i don't need to wait for anything, it just works. and then when i do want to take my time and work slowly for a better result, it dries too fast. it's kinda hellish trying to balance that time, especially considering how inconsistent paints are.

i like to use guidelines when doing art and i find painting straight onto a canvas to be really tricky because there's a lack of direction for me to actually paint. i'm at a complete loss at what to do when i pick up a brush because i can't map it out first without risking screwing up the paint. there's just so many things to keep track of and so much wet paint to avoid and i just do not have the mind for it. putting colours on a canvas and praying that it works just isn't it for me and requires a discipline that i just don't wanna involve myself with. painting is also just like... really exhausting and kinda painful. i got some pretty bad back issues and my arms tire and get sore easily and quickly when i'm standing in front of a canvas. it's a really physical activity for me and i just don't find something to be very fun to do at all when it's physically hurting me. i know drawing on a canvas has this issue too, which is why i prefer sketchbooks. sitting down and drawing something that doesn't break my entire spine every time i do it is much more preferrable than questioning if i should go to the doctor every time i make a brushstroke, lol

that's not to say that there's nothing i like about painting though! i can paint simple little things, and i like doing that. i like mixing colours with a palette knife and i find it fun and even a little relaxing. i painted some cute little chibi cardboard cutouts of the mario brothers one time and i found that to be really fun and i think i'd like to do that again! but apart from that, i just do not have the patience for it. i love the look of traditional paintings and i find many to be really beautiful, but i could never get into actually doing it myself because i hate the process. i'm content with just sketching and doing digital stuff because that's more fun to me and less stressful of a process to do. it's fun, it allows for more mistakes, it's easier to build up layers of shading and lines, not to mention using building up a figure with guidelines is super helpful with visualising what i want it to look like, and i can just erase something if i don't want it there or want to change something. it just makes sense to me.

tl;dr i dont like painting because it's inconsistent, expensive, time-consuming, directionless, frustrating and it makes my back hurt really bad. i'll just stick to drawing stuff :)

[nikkxb]

MWAHAHAHA For the Fic Asks, all the ones that end with a 4 (I'm are greedy) and of course, 10! Lay it on me, friendmigo!

Fanfic Asks || @pointyobjects​ 

Holy geez, lady. 

4. Do you ever re-read fics? How about triple-read? 

Yes! Not every fic and not even every fic that I love, but I definitely reread. Sometimes, there’s a scene that hits the right emotional chord and reading through it is amazing. It depends on the characterization and plot and writing style, but there are a lot of different reasons I’ll reread a fic. Especially in smaller fandoms. 

There are fics I’ve lost track on how many times I’ve read. Other fics where I’ve reread specific chapters over and over and over again. I don’t keep track of it. I kinda go with the flow, but I absolutely reread fics just to experience them again. 

14. What makes you give up on reading a fic? 

Oh boy. I feel this question is more focused on giving up half-way through rather than not reading after the first chapter or two, so I’m going to focus on that. 

Bad characterization. Sometimes, I’ll continue reading if there’s something “off”, but if it gets to a point where it pisses me off, I’m done

I read one fic where I continued past different nuances that rubbed me wrong for 23 chapters because by then, I’d already overlooked so much, I could keep ignoring it. But then a new character was introduced, but the characterization was completely screwed over because the writer used the character for a plot device, and I dumped that fic immediately.

Not enough happy times to balance the pain. This is probably the most common reason I’ll stop reading a fic. People really like their angst fests and while I can see the appeal, I can’t do it if it’s all doom and gloom. I need a balance, that kind of roller coaster with equal parts up and down that escalate toward the story’s climax. If it’s all bad bad bad bad bad, I’ll stop reading and remove all notifications. 

Double dislike if it uses red herring happiness. One fic I read was intending to be a dark fic, but then had this string of happiness forming between two characters. A sense of peace was settling in during a trying time. But because that’s not the main ship they wanted, that peace and happiness was destroyed and used to hurt the characters even more. I don’t read that. I don’t like that. It’s absolutely not for me. 

Bad smut. There, I said it. A little crazy and ridiculous, but it’s true. I will absolutely back out of a story if the smut is terrible. 

And I’m not using a loose definition of the word ‘bad’. Being new at something doesn’t make you ‘bad’. Being rusty at something doesn’t make you ‘bad’. Learning is not bad, inexperienced is not bad. 

When I say bad smut, I mean “that’s physically impossible” or “that action just tore skin, where’s the blood and the tears” or “yo dude your characterization DOES NOT EQUATE to what they’re doing, why so inconsistent” or “if you did the barest bit of research, you would see what you’re writing is wrong and unrealistic” or, my favorite, “your two characters have been snarky, sarcastic, and emotionally tight-lipped this entire time, where on earth did these over-the-top romantic proclamations of love come from?” 

24. What’s the longest fic you’ve ever read?

This sent me on a serious search, holy crap. I checked the main fandoms I’ve read, so there could be some outlier somewhere that I binged and forgot about. BUT the longest fic I’m aware I’ve read is Par Tout Autre Nom by Deviation. It’s a Yu Yu Hakusho/Inuyasha crossover (I’m aging myself something fierce) and is about 500,400 words long according to the website.

I cannot believe I’ve read fics that long.

34. Name a common type of fic that you cannot stand.

Mpreg. I don’t even attempt to read them. There are a lot of tropes I don’t like that I’ve read because the author has done them well, but I will not read mpreg, no matter how it’s done.

44. Do you mainly read TV shows, movies, or books?

TV shows. It used to be more book based back when I was in the Harry Potter fandom (over a decade ago). I’ll pop in to a few book now and then fandoms when I find one and there are a few movies I keep returning to, but TV shows are my main source currently.

And to be more specific, it’s mostly anime shows. I’m not completely sure why, but I have a hunch that I tend to avoid fandom for live-action shows and movies because I find it’s a little too close to real life? There are a lot few Marvel fics I don’t read because the physical descriptions and personalities mirror the actors more than the characters and I do not read real life fic at all.

So yeah. Mostly TV shows and anime specifically.

10. What’s the most hard-core smut or kinky fic you’ve ever read (be honest)!

I should have known this was coming.

I’m having a hard time picking one. I know I’ve read countless, but it’s been so long that I can’t remember if they’re actually as smutty/hard core as I remember it being. However, the three that come immediately to mind are:

You’re Mine by kittenchild on AFF. SessKag, dubcon, BDSM.

Belated Gift 2 by merrow on MediaMiner. Shigure/Tohru, dubcon, kink.

What Doesn’t Kill You by Stark_Black on AO3. KakaIru, BDSM.

You’re Mine is a mix of dubcon and BDSM in that Sesshoumaru blackmails Kagome into being his sub. Belated Gift is on the list because it’s dubcon like crazy because Shigure manipulates Tohru like crazy. The actual story is darker than I thought it was when first reading it. 

What Doesn’t Kill You is actually my favorite on this list because it’s not dark at all. There’s no dubcon, but it’s an explicit journey/education of BDSM. I love it so much because it paints a very healthy view of both the kink and the relationship, even during murky times. The fic uses sex to tell the story rather than using the story to have sex.

THERE. I’M FINALLY DONE.

[iamcinema]

IAC Reviews #19: Wishbone (2000)

Hey, is anyone still alive out there? I hope so.

Coming off of last year was a disaster, and well, we didn't enter 2021 on the highest of notes. I guess you could say I've been burned out and not having a ton of motivation to do a lot, even with how much I've been grinding on Letterboxd over the past few months. I think I'm ready to come back, and since there's a storm is brewing outside, let's make today a movie night...and boy, do I have a treat for you.

I think I've made it kind of apparent that I have a weakness for terrible, low-budget, trash fires. There's something oddly charming about them where they always find a way to lure me in, and given the scene on Letterboxd, there's a bunch of SOV masochists out there waiting to get their next fix. While digging around for material to cross off my lists on titles to find and add, I was reminded of a terrible, low-budget film that was shot in my hometown over 20 years ago. I'm full of fear for what's to come, and you should be too.

________________________________________

Wishbone is a 2000 horror film directed by Timothy Gaer and co-created by Michael Fasciana, centering on a woman named Laurie who receives an unusual artifact from her eccentric aunt she acquired from a pawn dealer that causes those around her to disappear when they make wishes on it. Hmm, seems simple enough. Let's what we're in for, and I'm absolutely not ready because the IMDb page says this shit is over two hours long, despite a version on Youtube having it just a bit over 90 minutes. Let us pray.

Wishbone in One Gif:

This acting is might be the death of me, but I'm not sure what's going to be the catalyst that causes me to fall down the stairs and break my neck: the sound quality, the weird editing, or the music...oh, god what the fuck is the music doing? So much noise, noise noise!

Okay, so let's dig into this before I take too long of a break and I don't come back to this. I've already had to pause the movie a few times to catch my breath or just rewind and go back because there's a good amount that I keep missing because, apparently, the star of the film is the score and not Laurie. This is so, so slow. I've seen a lot of long horror movies, but at least with those, it feels like things are happening. Even Blood Lake had filler that did something to some degree, and with that, it was consistently bad. This movie doesn't even know what it wants to do. So, as a disclaimer, there's a good chance I'm probably missing some key details that I didn't hear because it seems that characterization isn't important if the music insists on talking over everyone.

________________________________________

So, to date, this might be one of the worst horror movies (and movies in general) that I've ever seen and it might be one of the slowest things in the entire megaverse. This is over 90 minutes of, somehow, nothing and something happening simultaneously - if that makes any sense.

This takes its sweet ass time moving along and there's so little pay-off. The majority of the characters are either nameless or we aren't introduced to them in a way that matters enough for us to care about them. It's kind of like with Violent Shit and other low-budget slasher films where the majority of the characters serve no purpose but to be disposable. Next to the two main leads, Laurie and Joe, and maybe a few others, everyone is just forgettable and even then I couldn't honestly tell you anyone's name if it was explicitly brought up. IMDb isn't helpful either, and at this point it just makes me care even less. I'm not sure if my patience has been tested too much with this, but it's kind of sad that I'm more invested in seeing what the background characters are doing than Laurie and Joe - even though I can't really hear what the hell they're saying.

Yeah, I really can't move on without talking about the sound and the music. Why is it always the audio with these movies? This has an estimated budget of $100,000, or $154,779.43 today in August 2021. How do you have the ability to somehow not make this look like a potato for the most part, well for the day shots that is, but you don't have it in you to get a good mic and someone who knows how to mix and edit correctly? I would sort of understand if you spent the majority of the money on talent to cut corners, but this is just ridiculous. Did they use the cameras' built-in mics to catch the audio here?

I feel like I need to interrupt the movie constantly to tell them to speak up because if I turn up the volume, I'm just getting bombarded with this really weird soundtrack that doesn't fit. I shit you not, during one of the kill scenes, the music booming over it sounds like it was ripped from Kevin MacLeod's "lounge" library and then the reverse happens where ominous music is playing over a more touching scene - and that's not even a dig at Kevin as an artist. That's just how inappropriate and unfitting this editing is. The weird fucking thing about this specific kill scene is that it sounds like the audio is stacked, so there are two different instrumental tracks going on.

How do you fuck something as basic as tension up like that? The audio choices are so painfully inconsistent and it doesn't know what it wants to do. There are moments where you can hear the dialogue just fine, but then the music comes in out of nowhere to segway us into the next scene and it starts to muffle things out. If it isn't that, then the dialogue is just so soft that you'd think there was a pillow on the mic or we're hearing them from the opposite side of a sound-dampened room.

This is what I meant earlier when I said I apologize in advance if I miss anything crucial because I can't make out half of these conversations. So, I'm having to keep going back if I care enough or just having to pause and take breaks because there's only so much I can handle. This means that there's a good amount I'll blank on because I have to keep going back because I can't remember the majority of these no-named characters. Who the fuck are you people? Why am I supposed to care?

If I'm understanding the non-existent rules of the wishbone, you're connected to whoever dies in some way. So, why is any of this relevant to what's going on? If it's random, then it's another reason for me not to care just because some frat kids made a wish at some point. Again, who the hell are you and why am I supposed to lament over them? Why is there so much useless filler here? Did I mention that this is over 90 minutes long and there are *three* fucking party scenes? Party scenes are to Wishbone as ten-minute-long jetskiing and beer game scenes are to Blood Lake.

Oh, speaking of other shit that's annoying. Let's talk about general editing because the sound isn't the only thing that's a mess here.

I swear that almost every single scene in this ends with a fade-out/fade-in shot. Only one or two scenes come to mind where this doesn't happen, and the first time it did I thought my browser was freezing because it abruptly cut to black and then smash cuts to a party scene. I've never, ever seen a movie that abused this that much before and it's on par with something I would have seen made by a bunch of high school kids. So, when we have a moment where this doesn't happen and it plays out normally, it feels like a breath of fresh air. I'm sure this movie's run time could have been shaved down by at least a minute or two if this wasn't a problem, along with all the useless close-up shots that serve nothing to the plot.

It's such a waste of time. I'm so fucking tired. How was this movie's budget $100k? Did they spend most of it on renting the Scranton Police Department for a few shots or did it go towards their impromptu trip to Party City? I'm so tired and I don't care anymore.

Do you want to know what the real kicker is? With just barely twenty minutes left, the whole lore about the monkey's wishbone paw comes back and that's when Laurie and her friend Karen think something is weird. Isn't this whole realization trope that happens within the first or second act, not now with your Great Value brand version of the Dream Warriors?

Also, it's not specified how much time has gone by since the start, but it has to have been at least a week or two. It's incredibly weird how they paint the main characters and the unnamed background ones as such good friends that they don't think it's weird how almost all of them have disappeared - especially one girl who doesn't seem off-put that her boyfriend (or ex) disappeared after getting into an argument at one of the parties and none of his friends could reach him either at his own house.

The final showdown is an utter pain in the ass to get through because the conflict ends as abruptly as it starts and it's so unsatisfying. We get to see the face of our villain, I guess, and then more or less cut to our leads holding hands down the street set to the same looping lounge music we've been dealing with for over 90 damn minutes. Is everyone else who went with them dead? Did they live? Who cares! That's one thing the movie and I can agree on since we never see them again. We end on a shitty cliffhanger that's supposed to prepare us for a sequel, which thankfully never happened.

________________________________________

And that was Wishbone. Holy fucking shit, I've never been so thankful for a movie to be over in my life. It's 11:07 PM as of tinkering with some minor revisions and I've been in purgatory with this for over five hours, and yet, it feels like an entire lifetime has gone by.

I've raved about how bad Blood Lake was with its incredibly bad pacing, but this is next level awful and a testament to bad filmmaking if I've ever seen it. I expect a lot of the things I complained about from super amateur filmmakers who are shooting on an actual shoestring budget, not people who had that much money to fuck around with. How did they have that kind of a budget, and the most they can give us is bad audio, Windows Movie Maker levels of basic editing, three wrap parties, and a few crumbs of gore that we could see?

This was physically painful to see and I'm in much worse shape having endured it than I would have been if I sat through something liked Boardinghouse, and that has a two-and-a-half-hour-long version tied to it. This is just a marvel and I mean that in a so-bad-it's-bad way, not like how SOV enthusiasts who love this stuff pine over. If I had to give one thing going for it, one single granule of gold that I enjoyed from this, it's the limited shots we get of the area so I could make a game out of seeing what local spots I recognized. If playing I Spy is the only way for someone to endure your movie, then I don't know what else to say.

Wishbone is a hot mess where shit's happening, but also nothing is happening at the same time. I wouldn't wish this on anyone. In fact, I wish this movie never existed or would die in the ether and never return to our mortal realm ever again. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go have a smoke and hope I don't get run over by a hearse tomorrow.

RATING: 0.5/10