#n it says in both their bios they’re poly

[bimiio]

<3

[shuckinbeanz]

Sym-SFW Alphabet

warnings/notes: he doesn't have any alphabet hcs last i checked! so i'm making some for him n Dys 🥺👉👈 sfw ofc, and contains spoilers. intended for a human reader.

MINORS 👏 DNI! 👏 AGE 👏 IN 👏 BIO 👏 OR 👏 DNI! 👏 Head on over to @candybowbeansies please for my SFW pieces, or be blocked if you interact here! 😇

Tags: @dynamightsdaydream

HCs for Symmie <3

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

If there's one thing anyone knows about Symbiosis; he's very affectionate. A complete cuddlebug. He can't wait to show you so. many. things. He plays a big part in his planet, after all! Everything is so beautiful, if fleeting, just like his favorite humans.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Cheeky bugger. He enjoys the small things in life-it's all so precious to him! If you tend to overthink things or are indecisive, he'll be your ground. He'll be there to remind you of your roots, because a lot of things are actually simpler than humans think!

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Complete. Cuddlebug. Like I said! Think of him as a black labarador retriever...except he's a tall ass lanky alien.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Doesn't know the first thing about day-to-day things, doesn't need sustenance to survive(his physical humanoid form gets that from the vats), but he's surprisingly hygienic. Wouldn't hesitate to settle down with you and other(s, he's poly!) if asked! At least to a Gardener's standards-he's got a planet to keep going, so please be understanding.

On a separate note, he can't have kids, it's canon. But if you know a lot and I mean a lot about Biology and DNA and anything else that matters on that, he sucks up knowledge like a sponge-ya'll might be able to figure something out!*

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Sym literally was a plant for over 300 years just to prove a point to his fellow Gardeners. If you give him a big enough reason to end any relationship, he will do it immediately and politely.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Depends. What kind of commitment we talkin'? I'm joking. Loyal to a fucking fault, man would literally sacrifice his existence for what he loves. Doesn't see the point in marriage until the rings pop out-something to treasure, take care of, and remember you and any other s/o by for centuries to come. Again, he's poly! Love is love, and he has a huge heart.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Very gentle, kind, literally the patience of a saint. If there's something he doesn't understand, he will try his damnedest to. He will always be there.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

CUDDLEBUG.exe need i say more?

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

The first chance he gets, followed by all the time. And the thing is, with him, it never gets old. 🥺

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Jealousy? Who, Sym? That's not in his vocabulary. 😂

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Forehead, knuckles, cheeks, temples, nose. His kisses are the cuter ones most of the time, and it happens when he's feeling playful(which is basically 24/7).

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

The colony Manny. I 120% guarantee you, he will melt the hearts of even the toughest, most standoffish kids.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Doesn't need sleep. Might've scared you a few times before, admiring you taking a nap. Be sure to set healthy boundaries with him ahead of time!

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Most nights are cuddles, and he's often back to the vats. And if ya'll figure something out*...that's something for his NSFW HCs. 🥴

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Completely and utterly shameless. Tells you about everything off the top of his noggin. There's no secrets, and if there's more to know, simply ask!

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

You have to do a lot and I mean a lot to even remotely upset him. We'll get to one of the things under Security.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Every. Single. Thing. He remembers every. Single. Thing. Better learn to have little to no shame with this man if you aren't already shameless.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

The moment you landed on his planet. Okay, I'm half joking. Definitely the first kiss. No, not that first kiss, his physical form died protecting you. 😭 He wasn't able to back that memory up into the main frame!

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Can be extremely overprotective. Has zero self preservation, is basically suicidal. Doesn't see the need to preserve his physical form when he could easily make hundreds more. Yes, his physical form can feel pain.

While he finds it very unpleasant, he wouldn't hesitate to get himself hurt again, or even killed. Won't be able to remember what happened in the span of time from his most recent backup, to his death.

If you try to protect him, he just won't see eye to eye with you. While he finds the smaller things cute, he will throw a conniption fit if you attempt to protect him from something deadly. You're only human, little one. Don't go trying to end your life over something he can take care of easily.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Oooh, events. He absolutely adores these, he puts his all into everything, including simple everyday things.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

His worst habit? Trust me, he means well, but he can seem very condescending when it comes to the topic of a human's fragility. You're friends with/dating/married to a Gardener, so please try to be understanding of his views, no matter how frustrating they might be to you!

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Seriously doesn't give a fuck about how he looks. He's been a flower, a tree, a beetle, even a freaking swarm of hecklebees. But when it comes to humans he's close to? Oh, absolutely adorable. S/o? He will quickly learn the terms hot/sexy/handsome/beautiful.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

He's Symbiosis. Unlike humans, he doesn't 'age' but he can cease to exist. Of course, he'll mourn any passing of those close to him, but he knows it's the cycle of life. If a relationship is ended? He's an optimist. Won't feel down for too long.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

Can purr. Yes, aliens purr propaganda.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

Honestly? There's not many things that are a definite no for him. It'd have to be pretty bad things. Other than throwing your life away too easily, I'd say mass ecoterrorism. If you want to try and destroy what he and his fellows worked so hard to maintain and protect, kindly go fuck off to another planet. Maybe something there might want you.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Doesn't need sleep. But he does spend some nights cuddled up to you!

[moonlit-han]

part i: he came in through the bathroom window

genre: college au, neighbor au, fluff, humor pairing: femme reader x 3racha in poly relationship part word count: 5k part warnings: suggestive, alcohol consumption, explicit language request: yes and no~ a/n: this is in no way represents stray kids or bang chan, seo changbin, and han jisung, as it is a work of fiction. and to my readers: this is the first part in a series that’s rather dear to my heart, and while i’m not sure how long it’ll end up being at the moment, i hope you enjoy it!

✧ masterlist & tag list info in bio ✧

↠↞

Just before your final year of college, you moved into a new apartment—well, your part of a shared house that had been made into several apartments. There was another one on the ground floor with yours, and then two upstairs. It was clean, with lovely light and a surprisingly nice kitchen. Your bedroom was nicely proportioned, too, with amazing closet space. The bathroom adjoined your neighbor’s, and there was even a little door that connected the two, for some reason. You quickly found that you had to leave the window open, even just a crack, to air out the room—an old house meant no ventilation fan. Occasionally, the proximity to your neighbor made it a little weird when you ended up taking a shower at the same time because he sang in the shower. On more than one occasion, you had to stop yourself from joining in.

You later found out that said neighbor was a music student at the same university as you, and you were sure you would have never met him if he hadn’t been your neighbor. He didn’t hang out with the same people as you, didn’t have any of the same classes, seemed to spend all his time shut up in his apartment occasionally strumming on a guitar, and was just generally an introvert. He did seem to have two best friends whose laughter you heard through the walls on a regular basis.

On the second day you lived there, a Friday, he knocked on your door, a mango in one hand and a bottle of wine in the other. 

“Hi, I’m Jisung,” he chirped. “I live next door. I brought you a house-warming gift—sorry it isn’t fancier. Hope you like it!” Jisung thrust the wine and mango into your surprised hands and then darted away to the other side of the house before you could even invite him in. You just stood there for a solid two minutes, staring into nothing with the mango and bottle of wine.

Wow, he was hot. Shit.

For the rest of the day, you went about your business, unpacking and arranging your things. The bottle of wine drew your eye but you resisted temptation, knowing that you wouldn’t get anything done if you opened it in the mid-afternoon. Occasionally, you heard music or slightly worrying thumps from Jisung’s apartment. But, you’d only just moved in and didn’t know him well enough to feel comfortable going to check on him. Surely he was fine, right?

Around 6 pm, you gave in and got the bottle of wine. Rummaging in one of the boxes still lounging on the kitchen floor, you found a wine glass, and miraculously, the bottle opener, too. As you poured out the liquid, it smelled fruity and a little sweeter than you normally liked wine, but it was a gift and you’d been working all day. You couldn’t pass up free alcohol. And perhaps because you’d been moving in all day, the wine tasted delicious and you soon poured yourself another glass. Thinking there had to be a reason for Jisung including a mango, of all things, with the wine, you sliced it and ate a few pieces in between sips of wine. The combination was perfect, and you wondered how Jisung had discovered such a lovely pairing.

As you settled in for evening, your thoughts strayed to your new neighbor. He seemed nice enough, albeit a bit shy, and was thoughtful enough to bring a housewarming present. That had to count for something. But what you couldn’t get out of your head was just him—the way his eyes sparkled with mischief, the way his hair swooped around his face. And with the hoodie that practically swallowed him whole, Jisung was absolutely the cutest, most handsome guy you’d ever seen. 

Pausing the show you were watching on your computer, you had to take a few deep breaths to calm your racing heart. You’d only just met the man, and you hadn’t even said anything! How could you be falling for him already? Heck! Giving up completely, you decided to go to bed . . . on the sofa you were currently occupying because you hadn’t set up your bed yet.

 ↠↞

Three months later, you were successfully moved in and your classes were in full-swing. You’d seen Jisung a few times as you came and went from your apartment, but you hadn’t really talked much. You were okay with that, though—classes were busy and it wasn’t as if there was some mystical Book of Rules for New Neighbors that you had to read and follow directions from. When you did talk, though, he was perfectly nice, making sure to ask how you were doing and actually listening to what you had to say—a rare quality, you’d found. He always gave you a toothy grin that seemed to light up his whole body, too.

Your door knocker barely ever got used, which was why when very loud knocking echoed through your apartment on Saturday, you were sure the apocalypse was coming. Cautiously, thinking of all the bad things that could happen if the person on the other side of the door meant you harm, you opened your front door. Revealed on the threshold was Jisung, along with two other young men who could only be the best friends you heard so often. 

“Hey, Y/N,” Jisung said, moving slightly to the side so you could see his companions. “So, I figured I’d introduce you to my friends, since they’re around a lot. Also, I usually ask one or both of them watch the apartment when I’m gone sometimes.”

“Oh. Okay,” was all you could manage while being stared at by three highly attractive young men.

“Can we . . . come in?” Jisung asked hesitantly.

“Um, yeah sure,” you said, blinking, and moved out of the way.

So that was how you ended up with Jisung and his two best friends lounging on the couch in your apartment. They seemed perfectly at home, not noticing or simply not caring about the mess of books and mugs on your coffee table, nor the—

Oh shit, the laundry. 

Your laundry—underpants, bras, and all—was hanging on a drying rack in the corner of your living room under the window. You scurried over to the rack and quickly threw a towel, which had been catching any rain that happened to fall on your windowsill, over the clothes. Turning round, you found the guys looking at you. You smiled nervously, knowing you were blushing.

Jisung put his head in his hands. You felt like doing the same thing just then.

“So, let me guess,” said the one sitting on Jisung’s left, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees. “You’re name’s Reina, right? Since you’re lovely as a queen?”

You burst out laughing. You couldn’t believe someone had actually just used such a ridiculous pick-up line on you. “Sorry to disappoint,” you said, still giggling. “My name’s Y/N.”

“Oh well,” Chan said in mock-sadness, “that’s a pretty name, too. Just about as pretty as you!”

“Chan, fucking hell, man,” Jisung groaned. “Can you not flirt with every single person I introduce you to?”

“Sorry, ’Sung.” He still winked at you, though.

“Yeah. Okay.” Jisung addressed you again. “So this,” he pointed at the one he’d called ‘Chan,’ “is Chan. And the other dork who insists on being friends with me is Changbin. They’re also studying music composition and production.”

“Nice to meet you. And honestly,” you added conspiratorially, “I don’t understand why you’d want to be around Jisung either. Did you know he sings in the shower?”

Now it was Chan and Changbin’s turn to burst out laughing, falling onto the sofa’s arms.

“Jisung, your neighbor’s cool!” Changbin chuckled once he got himself under control. “Why didn’t you introduce us sooner?"

Jisung blushed faintly and grumbled something about not getting the chance. He’s really cute when he blushes, you thought.

“But yeah, we’re the bane of the Music Department’s existence,” Changbin said cheerfully. His voice was slightly husky, but somehow melodious, too.

“Just call us 3racha—because we’re spicy like Sriracha sauce!”

“Chan!” Jisung hissed, shoving his friend but he couldn’t wipe the grin off Chan’s face. Even though he seemed determined to be the cheesiest person ever, you noticed that Chan had extremely cute dimples and kind eyes.

“Wow, you three really are something,” you observed, with only a hint of sarcasm tinging your voice. “Jisung, did you really just come over and insist on coming into my apartment just to introduce your friends? Or, did you need something?” It came out slightly harsher than you’d meant it, but still. He’d practically barged in!

“Um, yeah, pretty much,” Jisung said. “Like I said, I wanted you to at least know who the people coming and going were.”

“And if you ever need anything,” Changbin added, “we’ve got you.”

“Thanks?” you said, not quite sure how they’d be able to help you, since you’d a) only just met them, and b) didn’t have any way to contact them. Although, Changbin did have a quiet confidence about him that was actually quite reassuring.

Jisung sighed, a little fidgety. “Well, I think we’ve trespassed on your time long enough. Let me know if the music’s too loud, okay?”

All four of you stood at the same time, Changbin leading the way to the door. “See you later, Y/N,” he said. “It was lovely to finally meet the person we’ve been hearing so much about.” And then he winked, too. 

What was with these guys and winking? you groused to yourself, trying to keep ahold of your expression. Wait, he didn’t mean… oh fucking hell. Judging by Changbin’s smirk that’s exactly what he’d meant. Why did the walls have to be so thin? Why!

Clearly exercising all the self-control he had, Chan just waved and said “Bye” on the way out. Jisung stopped as he was halfway out your door.

“Sorry this was unexpected, Y/N. I just thought you’d like to get to know them.” Jisung smiled a little sadly, and with that, carefully shut your door after himself.

You let out a breath you didn’t know you’d been holding just as a small scuffle broke out on your front step. You could almost hear Jisung berating his friends for something. Running a hand through your hair and massaging a temple in the process, you walked back over to sit on the couch. As you continued massaging your head, your eyes were caught by a folded piece of paper on the coffee table. 

Strange, you thought, I don’t remember ever having that pattern of note paper. You picked it up and opened it to see. . . 

Wow, the audacity.

One of the guys had left all three of their numbers for you on that slip of paper. Chan’s even had a heart next to his. They really had some nerve. Then again, you weren’t exactly complaining that three hot guys had just left you their numbers. You never knew when that could come in handy.

↠↞

You were finally snuggled in bed when you heard a crash. You went stiff for a moment, thinking through the various things that could have made that sound in your apartment. The sound seemed to have come from the bathroom. Okay. So, it might have been the mirror or a glass you forgot to move off the edge of the sink. It didn’t have to be the window. Besides, there hadn’t been any other noises after the first.

Reluctantly, you got out of bed and trudged to the bathroom to see what had happened. The shelf you’d put up two days ago lay on the floor surrounded by the shards of a vase you’d placed on said shelf just earlier that evening. 

“Damn it,” you muttered, bending to pick up the shelf and the larger pieces of glass. The weight of the vase must have been too much for the shelf, even though you’d properly attached it to the wall. You methodically cleaned up the glass and reattached the shelf to the wall, not putting anything on it this time in hopes that it wouldn’t fall again.

When you woke up, the shelf was still up and you felt rather smug for putting it back up properly. And when you got home, the shelf was still up, too.

That night, you took a lovely bath—taking care to crack the window to let out the steam—twisted your hair up into a comfortable top-knot, and then laid down on your bed with just yourself for company. You sighed gratefully. It had been a long week and you desperately needed some rest.

But, before you could even settle into the softness of your mattress, you heard the distinctive sound of shattering glass. From inside your apartment.

Fuck, not again.

You slipped out of bed, throwing on your sleep shorts and a loose tank top before padding out of your bedroom. Walking as silently as you could, by putting your the balls of your feet on the ground before your heels, you made your way to the bathroom.

You heard a thump just as you put your hand on the doorknob. If that shelf had fallen again…

It was not the shelf.

None other than Han Jisung was sprawled on your bathroom floor, arms and legs going everywhere, and a look of distinct puzzlement on his face. He shook his head, clearly having banged it on the floor. There were bits of broken glass scattered all around him, and you could see a light dusting of it in his hair.

“What the fuck?” you shrieked, backing up to just outside the door.

Jisung looked up at you and grimaced. “Hi?”

“What the hell are you doing in my bathroom? How are you in my bathroom? You had better have a damn good explanation, Han Jisung.” You couldn’t believe it. You’d thought Jisung was nice, that he was normal. But this? Sneaking into your bathroom at 12:30 am? That was just too much. Only a creep would do that.

Jisung scrambled onto his knees, his back to the wall. Under the window. The window that had just been broken. “I can explain!” he said, hands going up in front of him as his shoulders shrugged, as if expecting a blow. 

“You’d better talk fast,” you said, your voice dangerously low. 

“So, like a dumbass, I forgot my key.” He gulped, then took a breath. “And the guy who lived here before you used to let me come through here when I forgot my key because there’s the connecting door.”

You glanced at said door, which you’d assumed was sealed permanently. Apparently not. You glared at Jisung, who continued.

“Um, I thought I’d just climb in and go through the door. I didn’t mean to break the glass, I promise! My foot just got stuck and so I kind of tripped through the window, if that makes sense? I’m so sorry, Y/N! I thought I’d told you about the whole window thing!” Jisung’s face was screwed up like he might cry, his whole body tense as he made himself as small as he could.

You almost felt sorry for him. Almost. But, you didn’t say anything, waiting for Jisung to provide more of an explanation.

“I— My front windows don’t open and the back and side ones open onto the hill, so there’s nowhere I can use to climb into my own apartment. That’s the only reason this has happened. Really, I’m sorry!”

“So,” you said, hands on your hips, “you’re telling me that you used to climb through this window whenever you forgot your keys.” Jisung nodded. “Did you ever think of making of copy of the key and hiding it under a rock or something?” You were in utter disbelief—how hadn’t he done that? Or given Chan and Changbin keys? You mentally rolled your eyes.

“Shit,” Jisung lamented. “No, I hadn’t thought of that. Like I said, he just let me come in this way and it seemed to work fine. Plus, I don’t think the landlord would like us making copies of the keys, right?”

“Jisung, right now that’s the least of your worries. Please remember that you’re sitting on my bathroom floor. At 12:45 am. I was in bed!” You sighed loudly. Jisung just looked so dejected, you couldn’t stay angry at him for long. “For fucks sake, come here,” you said, reaching out a hand.

He took it, careful not to step on any broken glass from the window, and let you pull him up. His hands were calloused from playing the guitar. And suddenly, Jisung was very close to you. Very close. You could see how long his eyelashes were and the place where he must bite his lip when he’s nervous—you could smell his shampoo. You were also all too aware of just how thin your tank top was, and, it would seem, so was Jisung. You crossed your arms, hoping he’d just think you were cold from the breeze coming in the open window.

“I’ll contact the landlord tomorrow and say I was playing baseball or something and accidentally hit a ball through the window,” he said quickly, stepping back and trying not to look any lower than your face.

“Okay,” you replied, heartbeat faster than you’d care to admit. “Thanks. Now please get out of my bathroom, Jisung. I really do want to go to bed.”

“Yeah, sorry. Really, Y/N. I’m so sorry about this. I’ll— I’ll go get some cardboard and tape to cover the window. I’m sorry!” Jisung seemed like he would start rambling wildly any moment now.

“Just go back to your apartment. I’ll take care of the window, okay?” you tried to be as firm as you could, but Jisung could do sad puppy eyes better than anyone you’d ever met. Dear god, this boy… You gave in. After all, it would be one less thing for you to do. “Fine, Jisung. You can patch the window. Do it quickly, since I want to go to bed.”

With a soft, apologetic smile, Jisung went to the half-door next to your bathroom cabinet. After a moment of him fiddling with the latch, the door swung inward to reveal a small space through which he could crawl. Sighing, Jisung bent down and looked up at you. It did not escape your notice that this was the second time that night that you’d seen Jisung on his knees. 

“Again, I’m sorry,” he said quietly. “I’ll be right back to fix the window—just go back to bed.”

Before you could respond, Jisung was crawling forward into the slightly dingy area between your apartments.

↠↞

Jisung did, indeed, take care of the window getting fixed. When you went out to check how it looked, you noticed a conveniently placed log that would make it much easier to, say, climb through the window above. You estimated the height from the ground to the windowsill, and realized that Jisung would have had to jump and then pull himself up just with the strength in his arms in order to get through the window. Yes, the wood shingle siding provided fairly good footholds, but not that much. Damn, you thought appreciatively, he’s strong. You were suddenly glad for the chill in the air to cool your now too-warm face.

You found yourself thinking about Jisung at the most inconvenient times, such as in your lecture classes, and quickly realized that, even though you didn’t know him as well as you’d like, you had a crush on your neighbor. Strangely, you still hadn’t run into each other on campus, but you’d seen Chan and Changbin—in the distance and too far away to talk to. You weren’t sure what to make of the fact that you were into Jisung, but your daydreams had certainly become much more vivid.

That one night was just the first time of many that Han Jisung crawled through your window in the middle of the night. By the sixth time it happened, you decided to talk to Jisung.

You heard the familiar rattle of the window and immediately raced into the bathroom in time to help Jisung down. It was a bit sad to see him on the floor after he accidentally caught a piece of clothing, his backpack, or, one memorable time, an earring, on the window. You held out a hand to him, and he took it, hopping into the room like a lady exiting a carriage.

Holding Jisung’s hand was surprisingly nice. His grip was firm and comforting, as if he were transferring his warmth and affection—

Wait, affection? Huh . . .

You quickly dropped Jisung’s hand, but not after checking that his feet were planted on the ground.

“Jisung, why don’t you come into the living room, okay?” you said, hoping you didn’t sound nervous.

“Oh. Sure!” Jisung was clearly baffled, since you’d never done anything like this. Remembering to shut the window behind himself, he followed you into your apartment. By now, he should have been almost used to seeing you in your pajamas, but he wasn’t. Your tank tops left nothing to the imagination, which was maddening for him.

You pointed Jisung to the couch, and he took a seat, sitting with his back ramrod straight and an expectant look in his eyes. You couldn’t help but smile a little as you curled up on the other end of the couch. Jisung, who took this as encouragement, smiled back. 

“Jisung, I’ve noticed that you’ve come through this way once a week for over a month,” you said. “There’s no way you’ve actually lost your key every single fucking week. So, why have you been coming through into my apartment every week?”

You knew it sounded a little silly, but he had been appearing between 9:30 pm and 1:30 am every Friday. 

“Um, yeah. I may or may not be really bad at keeping my keys on me. Also . . .” Jisung’s voice trailed off so quietly that you couldn’t hear him properly.

“What did you say?” you asked.

“I’m really bad at keeping my keys on me?”

“No, the other part,” you said slowly.

“Damn, I was hoping you wouldn’t hear that,” Jisung grumbled.

“Jisung, what the hell?”

“I wanted to see you,” Jisung said and ran a hand through his hair, embarrassed.

You were stunned. It almost made sense—Jisung was clearly an introvert and seemed to be one of those people who would rather do something outrageous than actually have to talk to someone, much less someone they had a crush on. Neither of you had exactly made many other attempts to see or talk to each other, besides random meetings at the mailbox and leaving your apartments at the same time. Although, he had asked you to bring him soup when he got a cold in September, and you’d happily taken him some. Amazingly, the fact that he’d been all but sneaking into your apartment for the last six weeks didn’t bother you as much as you thought it would. That, you realized upon later reflection, probably had something to do with your crush on him.

“You . . . wanted to see me?” you asked, voice soft. You barely noticed as you uncurled your legs and shifted closer to Jisung. Your hands rested on the upholstery beside you. 

“Yeah.” Jisung had moved closer, too, and now you were sitting side-by-side, facing each other.

“But why?”

“Because,” Jisung said as he reached out and linked his pinky finger with yours. You nearly jumped, the contact seeming like a spark leaping from him to you. “Well, you’re beautiful and kind, and I’d like to get to know you better. And whenever I hear you laugh at whatever silly thing you’re reading or watching, I end up giggling because it’s the best sound I’ve ever heard. Did I mention you’re beautiful?”

You were silent for a minute, staring into space level with Jisung’s elbow; he shifted nervously but you didn’t let go of his hand. Your mind raced nearly as fast as your heartbeat.

“Kiss me, then,” you said, and Jisung’s eyes went wide. “Kiss me, Jisung.”

Jisung hesitantly placed his hand on your waist as you gently cupped his cheek—you could feel his pulse jumping in his neck. His touch was light as a feather and you could feel his hand shaking, even as he drew you closer. He leaned forward at the same time as you did, too, and a dull ache spread through your forehead where it had hit Jisung’s.

You crinkled your nose, leaning your head against the couch, and rubbed your brow.

“Oh my god, Y/N, are you okay?” Jisung said, not even thinking as he ran his hand over what was now a slightly red spot of your forehead.

You giggled and said, “I’m fine. Are you okay, though?”

“I’ve had worse,” Jisung chuckled. He also leaned against the couch, resting his arm on its back as, throwing all caution to the winds, he traced the arch of your cheekbone with a fingertip. “Here,” he said as he leaned toward you again and placed a kiss on your forehead. 

“Aw, you’re too sweet,” you said. Jisung was directly in front of you and you thought, Well, since he’s already this close. So, you leaned in and placed kiss after kiss down his jaw. Still hesitant, Jisung turned his head slightly and brushed his lips against yours. It was only for a second, but you immediately caught his lips with yours, wanting more. As you took the lead, Jisung relaxed into the kiss. His lips were warm as you renewed the kiss over and over. 

You took a breath, smiling and moving your free hand to Jisung’s hair—It really was as soft as you’d always expected. He hummed contentedly, leaning his head back slightly into your hand.

“I’ve been waiting to do that for so long,” Jisung breathed, letting out what might have been a laugh or a sigh. 

“Me, too,” you said, still carding your fingers through his hair.

“And now you’re too far away,” Jisung pouted, and slanted his lips to yours again. Continuing to twine your fingers around his hair, you let your other hand run over Jisung’s arms and chest, then down to wrap around his waist. As you did, Jisung held your hip and pulled you closer so you were nearly sitting in his lap. Not that you minded. You transferred a hand to his shoulder so you wouldn’t topple over. Jisung swiped his tongue along your bottom lip and you gladly opened to him. He tasted of the vanilla chapstick he clearly used, and as you explored each other’s mouths, you slipped your hand under the hem of his shirt. 

The feeling of your hand on his skin nearly made Jisung faint from surprise and he gasped against your lips before kissing you even more enthusiastically. After long moments of wonton kissing, your arm ached a little from resting on the back of the couch and, reluctantly, you broke the kiss. Jisung’s lips were very red and swollen.

“Are you okay?” Jisung asked, worried as he pulled back, just in case. You didn’t let go of him, though.

“Can we change positions a little, Ji?” The nickname had just slipped out and you didn’t realize you’d call him that until you saw his expression.

“Of course.” Jisung paused, not exactly sure what to do next. “Um, what do you want to do?”

“Well,” you pretended to think for a moment, “we could lay down a bit?”

Jisung blushed a little at the implication that hung in those words. “That’s,” he began and cleared his throat. “That’s just fine with me.” 

Taking a deep breath, Jisung slouched back onto the arm of the couch, bringing you with him. You had to do some scooting yourself, and soon found yourself straddling his legs. Jisung reached up and pulled you down to him, running his hands up and down your back as he did so. You rested your forearms on the couch behind Jisung and brought your lips back to his, leaving little kisses around his lips before fully kissing him again. Kissing him was like finding a lucky penny: unexpectedly sweet and such a simple yet exciting thing that you couldn’t help but want to leap with joy. All of a sudden, a giggle burbled up out of you and you hid your face in the crook of Jisung’s neck. 

“What?” Jisung asked.

“Nothing,” you mumbled.

“No, really. What is it?” Jisung was quite curious now.

You lifted your head, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks. “I kind of want to see you shirtless now,” you admitted and immediately burrowed your head in his shoulder again.

Jisung laughed, really laughed, as he said, “Yeah? Well, I can’t take my shirt off with you on top of me.”

Still quite embarrassed that he’d even considered what you’d said, you sat up and Jisung lifted the hem of his t-shirt. You couldn’t help yourself once his shirt was off: you whistled, murmuring, “Holy shit.” While you’d guessed that Jisung had nice muscles, you weren’t expecting him to have abs for days and killer arms, not to mention perfectly proportioned pecs.

Jisung smiled, a little embarrassed. “Um, like what you see?”

“Oh, you have no idea,” you said, and trailed a finger down his chest. Jisung let out a shaky breath and you felt a hard pressure underneath your bum. Your pajama pants felt quite thin at the moment. Swooping down, you captured his lips again and continued to run your hands over every inch of him you could reach. Jisung moaned every time your hands returned to his chest, and he slipped a hand down to your bum to hold your hips to his. Your kisses were soon so heated they were almost desperate, your hands ranging over each other’s bodies as the warmth inside grew.

“Jisung,” you said, breathing hard. You sat up, realizing, belatedly, that your top was dangerously low now. “If we don’t stop now—”

“I don’t want to stop,” he whispered. “But if you do, we will. It’s okay, I promise.”

Jisung was so gentle and careful, you could almost cry. “Oh, Ji,” you murmured, and kissed him again, lingering at his bottom lip before pulling back. “I don’t want to stop either.”

Jisung craned his neck to kiss just below your ear. “Then we won’t.” As you continued kissing, any hopes of going back to sleep disappeared like mist in early morning sun. But you didn't want to go to bed, not when Jisung’s hands were slipping under your tank top.

[spitefulcrepechan]

Since everyone else is doing it, what better way to spend the day that than to talk about headcanons n shit?

Most of these ships are more just fandom stuff that i kinda picked up but there may be a few bit of original stuff here especially with like family n shit

Cafe Family

Starting out with this little thang.

Madeleine is married to Espresso who's also married to Latte, Latte is dating Almond who's married to Roguefort. Almond has two kids, Walnut with Roguefort and Cream Puff with Latte.

Madeleine is strictly homosexual but is very buddy buddy with Latte and they both accept the fact that they're married to the same lad. Latte is straight poly, Espresso is Bi poly, Almond is Pan poly, and Roguefort is also pan poly but leaning towards men.

Cream Puff and Walnut are indeed half siblings but their relationship is slightly estranged cuz Cream Puff was born from Latte while Walnut was born from Almond's magic, and that makes her kinda jelly of Cream Puff, not to mention Cream Puff is all about magic while Walnut is more into technology and stastistics. Nonetheless they can set aside their differences for a bit so at the very least they're acquainted.

Cream Puff doesnt often see Almond alot so she usually has Madeleine and Espresso as surrogate father figures, and they both give her love even if she aint their child. Walnut's still kinda getting accustomed to Roguefort being her new step parent but she surely doesn't hate them.

Also Roguefort is a demiboy, they/he.

Lab Family

Dr. Wasabi gave birth to Aloe Cookie through implantation(i forgot the word to it), and Aloe married to Cyborg Cookie prior to them becoming a cyborg, and during that time Aloe gave birth to Mustard Cookie. During Cyborg Cookie's robotification, Aloe created numerous Ion Cookie robots, ended up getting attached to them and treating them all as children. Bell Pepper ended up walking into their lives and after learning that he's an orphan, cyborg and aloe absolutely adopted him.

Dr. Wasabi is ace, Aloe is pan, Cyborg is aro, Mustard is woman-leaning poly who often hangs with Butter Pretzel and Gumball Cookie due to their affiliation with art, though they have more of a platonic relationship.

Bellflower and Bell Pepper are also bio siblings with Bellflower being the oldest but they were seperated at birth so theyre unaware of each other's existence. Also Bellflower is bi thanks for coming for my tedtalk

Don't have much to say about Bell Pepper, Mustard, and Ion's relationship, they're all just cool with each other

Aloe's transmasc, using she/they/he, cyborg's demigirl, she/they, ion's genderless

Citrus and Skating

Lemon Cookie likes Orange Cookie, Lime Cookie likes Lemon Cookie, and Orange Cookie likes both Lemon and Lime Cookie. Orange is oblivious to Lime's jealousy and sees how she acts a bit hostile around Orange as being a tsundere, which makes Lime feel a bit bad cuz Orange is her friend and she can't exactly control who Lemon likes. Both Lime and Lemon are unaware that Orange likes them both and Orange is unaware that Lime likes Lemon and Lemon likes her.

Lemon is also into DJ Cookie who kinda likes Lemon? But is also into Rockstar Cookie, who manages to shout his feelings a bit louder than Lemon.(more about the music fam next)

Grapefruit's kinda the 4th wheel in the whole love chaos with the citruses and is more supportive towards Orange and Lemon but she doesnt say anything and just continues skating around with Skater, Skating Queen, and Ice Candy Cookie.

Skating Queen and Ice Candy are both dating and they both codependent on each other for their health.

Lemon straight, lime bi, orange pan poly, skating queen gay, ice candy gay, skater's a kid.

i definitely got more headcanons but these are just 3 of them cuz im struggling to put my words onto paper as shown by how short number 3 is-

I'll prob make a prt 2 to this

[lovely-yandere-imagines]

Zipper Man Gives me the Moody Blues: Part 1

Hello lovelies~! I’m here with another commission! with poly BruAbba! If you’d like to commission me you can find the link right here or in my bio!

Notes: 18+ ONLY! This is part 1 on a 2 part commission! This is set a few years after the events of part 5 where Abbacchio has gotten his job back at the police station and even got a promotion thanks to his mafia friends.

Pairing: Poly Yandere!Bruno x Police Chief!Abbacchio x AFAB Reader

Warnings: Mention of murder, unhealthy relationships, Bruno is delusional and has a daddy kink, Abbacchio is manipulative and has a corruption kink, this one is pretty tame compared to part 2

Word count: 1,530

Description: Bruno unknowingly kills someone in front of reader and they run to Police Chief Abbacchio for help but doesn’t realize Abba is married to the very man they’re running from.

The horrible sound of body parts landing on the ground with a slosh still fills your mind as you run. Thankfully Bruno didn’t see you spying on him so you were able to slip away quietly and get some distance between you in case he realized he was being watched. You made your way to the police station, you had to tell someone about this but none of the cops would believe you or they could have been paid off by Passione. The very same mafia you expected your boyfriend to be a part of.

Hopefully, if you went straight to the Chief of Police, Leone Abbacchio, he would believe you. He had a great approval rating and he was seen as one of the only good officers in the whole city. Chief Abbacchio was part of the reason crime has been so low recently since he was elected, drug crimes were low and the streets have been much safer to walk at night, apart from Bruno’s killings Naples has been relatively safe.

If only you knew what waited for you after you had stepped through the doors at the police station, you had your mind made up, you didn’t even bother speaking a word to the receptionist as you walked past them and ignored their words of protest, Finally making your way to Chief Abbacchio’s office and pushing open the door with a determined face.

Leone was stunned to see you there so late at night but he quickly regained his composure and before he can get out a word you say “Sir, I’m sorry to barge into you so suddenly but I have some information on the murders that have been happening recently and-” Abbacchio cuts you off and asked bluntly “Well what can I do for you, you storm into my office like you own the place and now you’re telling me you have information on the Zipperman murders and you expect me to believe you?”

You feel like your heart is going to burst and call feel the tears starting to form in the corners of your eyes, if Chief Abbacchio won't believe you then you might just be killed by the very man you called your lover. “Sir I really am sorry to disturb you but this is a matter of life or death in my case…” you grimace at the thought of Bruno finding out you went to the police. Abbacchio sighs and finally specks “Frankly doll, you look like you’ve seen a ghost...tell me what you got and then we’ll decide if it really is life or death as you say.”

You feel a wave of relief wash over you and you start from the beginning, about how you had been suspicious of Bruno in Passione and how you decided to follow him tonight. How you witnessed him dismember someone without even touching them and how you’re now practically begging for Abbacchio to believe you. You also tell him how he’s the only person you could have gone to with this because you know that the cops have been being paid off by Passione.

Abbacchio sighs and smiles at you “Well I’m very impressed, it seems you’ve pieced everything together perfectly, I’m glad you came to me with this information Y/n. And with your testimony we’ll finally make the streets of Naples safe together, that is if you will testify against Bruno that is..” He sees your hesitation and how you seem to tense up, you hadn’t even thought of testifying against Bruno, the thought made you head swarm and you could feel a tightness in your chest.

“No no no! He’ll kill me you don’t understand! I can't!” you feel like you’re hyperventilating before Abbacchio puts his hand on your shoulder and tries to calm you down “Hey! Hey, it’s okay, I won't let him hurt you, I promise,” he thinks for a minute and looks you in the eye “I don’t think it’s safe here or for you to go back home, it would be best if you came back to my place so I can protect you.” You look up at him with a tear-stained face and nod and with that, he can’t help but feel his heartache for you.

Abbacchio takes you out of the back exit just in case anyone sees you leaving and ushers you into his car and within a few minutes you are at his house, it is situated in a really nice neighborhood and you can't help but think all the houses around look like miniature mansions, “I guess being Chief of Police pays pretty well huh…” you say absentmindedly you thoughts are cut off by Abbacchio’s laugh, “It does most days but it’s mostly long hours” He winks at you and you can feel yourself begin to blush. He soon guides you inside and gets you situated in the guest room.

“Are you hungry? Or thirsty? I’ll get you anything you want” You politely decline the offer of food but then ask “Actually if you have any I’d like a glass of wine, it helps me relax after a long day… or well night I guess” Abbacchio smiles and he is quick to return from the kitchen with a bottle and two wine glasses full of the red liquid. “I hope you don’t mind but I went ahead and poured myself a glass as well” you shake your head and insist that it's alright as he joins you on the bed.

“So...this is a little awkward but uh, I like your makeup Abbacchio, I don't really know a lot about gothic culture but it um...it looks nice on you!” you say cheerfully and Abbacchio smiles at you again. “You know Y/n, you can call me Leone, I have a feeling that we’ll be spending a lot of time together” He places his hand on your thigh and feel your heart racing and cheeks began to blush before you look down and can clearly see the wedding ring on his finger as you feel the color drain from your face.

“Is your wife going to be okay with me being here, Leone?” you ask quietly and he laughs again before answering “My husband actually, and I don't think he’s going to mind at all, you see we’re in an open relationship. I think he will be very pleased to have you here honestly” You can’t help but blush as you finish the last of your wine. “I’m glad he won't mind...so what music do you like?” you ask as he pours you more wine and you can see him ponder the question for a few seconds before he answers “I like a lot of different rock bands like The Moody Blues, The Cure, Joy Division, Type O Negative, and Depeche Mode... You know the basic goth stuff” He says with a laugh that makes your heart flutter a bit.

Oh, I really like Joy Division and The Cure too” you say cheerfully as you quickly finish your second glass and now begin to start on your third as you start to feel the effects of the wine starting to hit you. “You know, if it wasn’t for you Leone, I’d probably be dead by now…” he says nothing for a moment and then caresses your face and give you a sweet smile that could make any girl smile “You shouldn’t think about stuff like that Mimma, let's talk-”

You cut him off and quickly spit out “No its truuuue! If you hadn't listened to me I would be dead by now, Bruno would have killed meeee! Can you believe that ash hole, he’s been lying to me from the beginning! I can’t believe I gave that-that MONSTER my first kiss!! At least I didn't give him MY VIRGINITY” he watches you in your drunken rambling and quickly cups your chin and gives you a passionate kiss.

“Shhh, it's okay Piccolo, you don’t have to worry about him hurting you. I promise” Leone reassures you but before you can say anything you both hear a knock on the door and he shouts for the person to come in. In your drunken state, you can barely make out the tall figure that must be Abbacchio’s husband who has an all too familiar face and white suit.

“Well, well, well...I certainly wasn’t expecting this, Leone would you mind explaining to me why Bambina here is drunk?” you can see the man shoots Abbacchio a glare. He tries to explain but decides it best if he just shuts up. The second man makes is way over to the bed and lowers himself down to you and you can’t help but feel the horror and dread building in you as the man brushes your hair behind your ear and you can finally make out the distant features of your former lovers face, then Bruno finally speaks “It’ll be so nice having you here with us baby girl, we’ll finally be a family” He kisses your forehead and you can help the chill that goes down your spine. Your fate was sealed as soon as you walked into Abbacchio’s Office.

[delifreshvibez]

yoooo it’s pris again! ( i also play @aimeesgao​ ) this time with the boi jay de leon, or just deli, bc he’s dumb n says it’s short for delicious. definitely a simp. if u wanna read more about this dumpster fire of a man that i’ve based off of all the pinoy boys i know slkfjds pls read below ! and as always, message me or like this post so we can plot and do all that fun stuff yee 

( manny jacinto, cis male, he/him ) have you heard about JAY DE LEON? they’re a TWENTY EIGHT year old TEAM LEAD in the PHOTOGRAPHY team. i don’t know what their last job was, all i know is that they’re originally from LOS ANGELES, CA. carol in hr said that they’re kinda HEDONISTIC and MISCHIEVOUS but jessica in marketing insists that they are JOVIAL and CHARISMATIC. at the end of the day, no one is worthy of the instant hype here. i just hope they get achieve their dream of being A TRAVEL PHOTOGRAPHER one day. According to the latest Vibez quiz, their Disney soulmate is Li Shang. ( pris, she/her, 23, pst ) 

BIO

deli is an la native all the way, literally grew up right in historic filipinotown and knows this city by heart

his family, which consisted of him, his two older bros, a little sis and a dog, were lower middle class, so they didn’t have a ton of free spending money but were able to get by. both his parents emigrated from the ph before he was born

school was never really his strong suit, at least when he was younger. he had other things he was interested in that didn’t involve studying and while his parents disciplined it was never really enough to change his behavior

what he does love? dance. while studying did indeed suck, he was able to at least keep his gpa up enough to stay on the dance team in high school

it was no question that he’d go to community college first to figure things out after graduating high school, because higher education was on the map..... it was just that he got sidetracked by other things 

things took a turning point, however, toward the end of his senior year when his father lost his job during the recession. both he and his dad sought out minimum wage jobs after that, & deli juggled his two part time jobs with school

his goal then was to transfer to a 4 year university, which he eventually did 3 years later and entered ucla as a transfer student

there, he resumed his passion for dance in various teams and was active in cultural orgs. it was also when he really started becoming a raver and never looked back. he had always been into photography, then capturing events really helped him grow in his craft 

as a result of his portfolio, he was invited to apply to vibez as intern for the summer after he graduated college

there was a part of him that was hesitant though, as his degree was unrelated (communications major, asian am minor) and he hoped to have a set job instead of an internship. but if you know deli, you know the guy is king of throwing caution to the wind

what started out as an internship to add some experience to his resume, soon became a permanent job on the photography team

he’s stayed put for the past 4 years, excited at actually being able to turn his passion into a career

besides that, the job was just fun. eventually, he worked his way up to lead and has been sitting in the position for nearly a year

a lot of people say he doesn’t take his job seriously, but deli would say that there’s nothing wrong with laughing and being a riot as long as you meet the deadlines

work hard, party harder amirite? soft fuckbois have rights. deli is ceo of the company

the change in leadership has kind of thrown deli off tbh -- he hates the faster turnaround and the idea of quantity over quality but who is he to say anything?

STATS

sexuality: pan / queer

sun sign: sagittarius

ascendant: gemini

moon: sagittarius

MBTI: enfp

moral alignment: chaotic good

enneagram: 7w6

hogwarts house: gryffindor

vibes: peter pan, lil papi evangelista, klaus hargreeves

WANTED CONNECTIONS

platonic

RIDE OR DIE: charli xcx / vroom vroom - pax.

PARTY BUDDIES: other ravers, drinkers, parties that are down to hang

BAD INFLUENCER: *enables u*-  brady.

PLUG: his yelp reviews are 5 stars

PRANKSTERZ: the prank wars at vibez between them refuses to let up,,, it just gets more n more ridiculous,, pls stop them - sutton.

WORK WIFE/HUSBAND(S): it can be a poly work marriage he doesnt discriminate - hunter.

conflicts

HATER: for some reason, deli really grinds their gears so they can’t stand him - vanessa.

FRENEMIES: self explanatory

FORMER FRIEND: self explanatory

romantic ( open to m/f/enby )

FUCK BUDDIES: it’s just. fun. booty calls! are! valid!

FWB: we love to see it

RAVE BAE: u aint down

FLAMES: so it’s getting spicy spicy eh?

repeats the msg: if u made it all the way down here, ily ty! again, feel free to dm me or like this post and i will come bother u <333 also technically i’m at work rn oop so if i’m late to responding im so sorry lskfjls

[slasherscream]

poly Billy and Stu and their s/o as parents? like the type of father's they'd be and all

A/N: glad you all know that i'm only here to put these dumb-ass boys in all sorts of domestic scenarios and nothing else. 

     billy loomis x reader x stu macher   ft. starting a family with these idiots

                                                     ——————– 

Let's get one thing straight here. Billy has been dodging the idea of starting a family since you started having it. He could smell the urge to have a kid on you and was like (big gag). There are so many reasons for him being like this he can hardly name them all. This doesn't stop him from trying        you know, cause he's a huge asshole. 

Him? Somebody's Dad? Okay babe, sure. He lists a lot of reasons that have nothing to do with the root of the problem which is actually his own insecurities. Yes it's true he's never really liked kids much. Yes it's true he's probably not the best role model even after all these years of growing up. You get the picture already Billy, fucking hell. 

Stu is neutral on the subject for a long time until his own "biological clock" starts ticking. Then you both find yourself sharing longing looks at families you cross on the street. You'll be having lunch out somewhere and coo at a baby that's all the way across the restaurant. Stu happily joining in. Once Stu is on your side Billy starts getting really defensive  .... (aka more insecure). 

Honestly you're not the one to talk him out of his own head for this one. That's all Stu. Because as ridiculous and goofy as Stu can be he understands intimately and deeply how Billy works         no matter how much of an enigma Billy fucking thinks he is. Billy storms out because he doesn't want to deal with his feelings (first time he's done it in years) and Stu goes to chase him down and tells you not to worry, he's got this.

You're very upset but when they come back the first thing Billy does is kiss you gently, Stu standing in the doorway and simply watching. There's several visible hickies on Stu's neck so you know he and Billy already made up while they were gone. Now it's your turn to receive Billy's apologetic affection. You and Stu share a knowing exasperated look over Billy's shoulder. You both love him though. 

Billy was just insecure about being a shitty parent or your relationship falling apart and somehow effecting a kid. Honestly it all goes back to his own undealt with familial problems and once Stu gave him an honest talk about how you're all not #His Parents?? He's good. He's using his braincell again and he's fine. 

Now onto the actuality of having the kid! You're in for quite the ride co-parenting with these two bastard idiots.

Stu is the dad you can get away with doing just about anything with. He’s the parent that if you go to them they’ll just say yes. Sometimes he’ll use his one borrowed braincell and hit the kid with “did you ask dad?” or “did you ask s/o?”. The kid pouts because like .... obviously fucking not since I came to ask the parent who'd just give in. Weak-willed! Weak-willed! Weak-willed!

This is Billy every time he has to talk to his kid about any bad behavior.

You'll have to be the PTA parent right off the bat because the boys are just ...not gonna. Unless there's a real problem they're gonna default assume everything is fine and not look deeper or get too involved because like... This has nothing to do with my fucking kid in particular? You want me to go to a parent meeting....about....repairs in the library? Fuck you.

The one exception to this is during the "first starting school age" and it's Billy who is the exception. Stu loves the kid but he's very chill and not a helicopter parent. He's honestly the one who has to calm you two down a lot because he knows everything will be fine.

Billy? Kid first starts school and he's this parent (don't watch past 15:00). He thought he'd be fine but he's anxious as shit. The last one to leave the drop-off even if his kid is fine. But oh god .... oh god if they're freaking out? Oh boy he's gonna start freaking out. Hiding it like a pro but you know your man and can see the panic in his eyes. One well placed "daddy I wanna go home!" and he'll break and haul them right from the classroom. You and Stu have to intervene.

Billy wants to hang out in the cafe that just so happens to be a five minute walk from the school all day. You put your foot down and tell him they're gonna be fine. You have to cuddle him on the couch all day to keep him still. When it's time to go pick the kid up he's out the door ... so fucking fast. He almost leaves y'all highkey. Billy and the kid run to each other full speed and he picks them up and doesn't put them down...like....all day. No you two cannot get a turn. 

Sometimes Billy gets very emotional about the life they’re giving their kid. Not out of insecurity or anything like he thought would happen when he first thought of starting a family with you and Stu. He actually realizes that you’re all doing a fantastic job of being parents and that your house is full of love to the max. It makes him soft(TM).

Wanted to keep this totally gender neutral but it’s gotta be said ….. this goes double for if the s/o is a woman. Seeing them with their child stirs something in Billy deeply vulnerable. He’s literally buried his head in the crook of your neck before and thanked you quietly for being such an incredible mother. He was so sincere about it you started crying and honestly? ….Maybe he allegedly got misty eyed. Okay back to gender neutrality now! 

Y’all wouldn’t have more than two kids honestly. I can’t imagine Billy and Stu wanting more than that. And they’d want to have them really close together/close in age so they grow up close/as friends. They're the single kids who kinda wished they'd had a sibling growing up. Billy because he thinks that would have been less lonely and Stu because he thinks it would have been fun. You (if you have siblings) know.... better. But if you wanted multiple kids yourself you keep your mouth shut and just wait for them to watch and learn. 

Stu is the favorite parent honest-fucking-tea. He just is! He’s playful. He’s fun. He’s loving. He lets his kid climb all over him and play wrestle. They're constantly playing airplane or on this man's shoulders. He can match them energy wise any day of the week. He doesn’t stop being the favorite when they get older either. When the kid is like grown/20′s        basically whatever their "I am no longer being raised to be a person" stage of life? They’d probably dead ass hang out with him as a "friend".

"Nah I can’t come to the party I got plans with my dad this weekend…. fuck you he’s way more fun than you guys-”

Billy is the strictest parent but he’s very loving and devoted. He’s the parent your kid runs to whenever they feel they need protection. It warms Billy’s heart to be that to them. Their first line of defense against the whole world. It’s been like this since they were little. If they had a nightmare they’d run into the bedroom and bypass the two of you completely and head straight for Billy. He's also a little smug about it. Especially to Stu and especially if they have a daughter. I'm the alpha Dad?? Tremble before me.

They don’t have a preference for adopting or having bio kids. You’re probably the deal-breaker on that, your choice goes. 

Adoption? They both thought they wanted a boy. Super adamant about it. Gonna play football... grill shit together. ...grill a football together. You? Neutral. But all along you knew damn well you were gonna wind up having a fucking daughter. Lo and behold!

They see a little girl playing by herself in the corner. She can’t be much older than six. She set herself up a whole little mini city and then they watched as she took a dinosaur toy .... and destroyed it thoroughly. She made quiet screaming people noises and everything. Or just ..... this. They instantly looked at each other like 👀👀👀      are you seeing what I'm seeing? 

Billy, clutching his chest: oh shit what’s going on You: your heart is growing three sizes you fucking grinch- Billy: don’t fucking curse she could hear you and she’s ours now-

Once they've got the perfect weirdo little girl under their belt then they'll think about having a boy. But they'd want to make sure she's totally settled into life with the three of you before they bring another kid into the mix. And ... lmao if she expresses disinterest in having another kid around. She is ... #Princess and gets whatever she wants. Whatever! She! WANTS! 

You have to convince her you three will never love her less even with another kid around and besides .... she's gonna be getting a stinky brother this time so she'll still get to be daddy's (plural) little girl. She agrees and now the boys are back on board. Fucking absolute pussies. 

Funniest fucking thing if you guys go as a family once again to try and get a boy and instead your daughter bonds with a ..... get ready for it! Different little girl! Billy and Stu are fucking SCREAMING. Look at her this one is perfect too. God dammit ... god dammit we have another daughter now. 

Two daughters? Two? They'd rule the fucking house. Billy can see manipulation coming from a mile away and yet he let's it happen because they're both so cute running the show. Plus it's like when lions fake being hurt when their cubs attack them to encourage them to be better hunters. He wants his daughters sharp! He wants his daughters clever! He wants them to be able to do whatever the fuck they wanna do! 

Stu is less good at seeing the manipulation and it's so fucking funny .... he doesn't even wanna see it! He's legally blind! His babies want something? He will throw any amount of money at them and whatever they want. Is the Dad that they'd beg him to start like... a new hobby or sport and he'd get them everything they need to do it (top of the line expensive shit) and then! If they wanna quit a week later? Not even mad! What do we wanna do this week, sweethearts? 

You have to stop them from being spoiled, little monsters because your husbands sure fucking won't. 

You have walked in on them doing tea parties and you did take pictures. Stu was posing for them while Billy just looked straight at the camera with murder in his eyes and you knew in your heart you were gonna be getting payback for this later in the bedroom (worth it). 

Billy is the type of Dad that if he tells someone he's gonna be busy watching his kids and they go "oh? babysitting duty, huh?" he launches into a ten minute rant about "how am i fucking babysitting? it's my fucking kids? these are my kids? you can't baby-sit your own fucking kids. that's called parenting. you know what, Nicholas? that's why your kids are so fucked up-"

Billy starts beef with other parents if I didn't make that clear. 

Stu is the parent that gets too into whatever his kids are doing. School plays? Soccer games? Science fair? Jesus christ... he has quite literally almost gotten you all banned from every activity your kid has been in. He's gotten penalties before. Decided to skip the middle man once and coach your girl's teams to make it easier. Chaos ensued that summer. 

Honestly? Best Dad(s) Award. 10/10. Should totally do it again. 

                                                     ——————–

[justagoddamnbranch]

The Reunion V

((Warning for brief mention of animal death (skip past the first break if this bothers you but you want to still read), and an awkward family interaction))

Chomper had just enough of the shenanigans going on, and besides lunch was ready. He apologized to their guests, though they actually took no offense to Petey’s ‘ice breaker’ and continued the joke. Chomper kinda smiled off the jokes, though he did think they were somewhat funny, and excused himself to call Eddy and Leo in to eat.

“BOYS LUNCH IS-” Chomper squinted at the two, “I swear to god. BOYS WHAT ARE YOU DOING?”

Leo turned around and waved at Chomper before yelling back, “LOOKING AT A SQUIRREL I KILLED!”

Chomper frowned and put his hands on his hips, “LEONARDO STAFFORD, I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO STOP DOING THAT. BOTH OF YOU, GET YOUR HINEYS IN THE HOUSE AND WASH YOUR HANDS.”

Leo suddenly felt very guilty, his tail drooping ever so slightly. He shoved his hands into his pockets and slowly walked up with his tail between his legs. Eddy followed behind, completely unphased. When he was level with Chomper he leaned in and pecked him on the shoulder.

“It was an honest mistake, don’t be too hard on him.”

Chomper sighed, “Ok but I want him to make a formal apology to it once we’re done eating.”

Eddy tried not to giggle out loud at that, but he did manage to get out a “Will do.”

After everyone was seated and washed up, Chomper brought the meal to the table. He was careful to have the spaghetti separate from the meatballs in case anyone was only a carnivore or only vegetarian. Everyone was getting along for the most part, to Eddy’s surprise, until the food was finally done being plated. Then the questions came up, as he expected.

“So, Ed, do ya still do yer mechanic stuff?” Vardaman said between bites of his meatballs. He was the only one who passed on the spaghetti.

“Yep.”

Max licked his muzzle clean of the sauce dripping from it, “Are the cats outside yers or are they strays?”

“They’re outdoor cats.”

“Are ya still doin’ the poly thing?” Stone stared Eddy down, relatively uninterested in his food.

“Sort of.”

“So you ‘n Chomper are married?”

“Yep.”

Max tilted his head, “Didja adopt Leo or?”

“He’s mine.”

Stone decided to stop talking, but Max and Vardaman kept going. The tone of the questions became a lot lighter then.

“How old are ya Leo?”

“I’m 21.”

Vardaman cracked a smile, “So are ya goin’ t’ school or are ya gonna be a mechanic like yer old man?”

“I’m going to school, yeah. I’m getting my degree to be a preschool teacher.”

Max nodded, “Honorable work, good on ya.”

“Thank you.”

Max then raised his head towards the other end of the table, “So, Chomper, are ya really a gen-u-ine mermaid?”

“Yes sir, born and raised in the water not too far from here.”

“Better not go swimmin’ out there then, huh?” Max laughed.

“No, probably not in the winter, but definitely in the summer! We tend to stay away from land folks.”

“Oh.”

Rumble nervously looked down at her food. She was obviously thinking about something. She hesitantly spoke up when there was a lull in the siren talk.

“Ed?”

“Hmm?”

“If you had raised me would you have been wanted to be called dad?”

Eddy went quiet, but Leo looked back and forth between the two with wide eyes.

“Wait...wait. Wait hold on, this is my half sibling?” Leo gestured towards Rumble.

“Y-yeah? Is there a problem?” Rumbled tapped her fingers together.

Leo stared at her and blinked.

“Oh my god.” He smiled and wagged his tail hard enough it was squeaking his chair, “I’ve got a- wait are you a boy or a girl or nothin’ or?”

“Girl?”

“I’VE GOT-”

“Leo, hush, we’re right here.”

Leo quieted down but didn’t hold back his excitement, “I’ve got a big sister.”

Rumble was grinning too now, neck and tail feathers fluffing up a bit. She gave a few quick whistles before going back to her food. Chomper flicked his eyelights over to Eddy, who was silently eating his food. Chomper could sense that things were going to get a bit awkward, so he quickly changed the subject.

“So, um, do you guys play ball?”

Max’s ears raised up a bit, and looked over, “Yessir, I play hockey sometimes.”

Leo got distracted a bit with the sports talk, and started telling them about baseball and how he was going to try out for the school team soon. The rest of the meal went on without any big events.

When they were finished up, the group asked if Chomper needed any help washing the dishes. Chomper insisted that they go have fun, and that it wouldn’t be too much trouble. The group didn’t push the issue and decided that they were going to go look around town and take a walk. Once they were finally out, Eddy pulled Leo aside.

“Listen, Pup, please don’t get too attached to these folks.”

“Oh I know, they live in Indiana and-”

“No, no. It’s not that. It’s...,” Eddy sighed, “Leo, you’re old enough now I can talk to you man to man.”

Leo nodded.

“We you see, I...I’m not really that Rumble girl’s dad.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, it’s that darker skeleton who’s mad at me.”

“Ohhh, alright I get it.” Leo nodded, “But I thought you’re, like, her biological dad or something?”

“Technically yes, but I think that doesn’t really hold up too much. They’ve dealt with her all these years, made her the young lady she is today, and then out of nowhere she comes up and wants to say that I’m her real dad. After all that.”

Leo nodded, “Tough one.”

“Very much so.”

“Well...I think you should go with it.”

“What?”

“I think you should go with it but I don’t think you should have her call you dad.”

“...ok I’m listening”

“What if she called you daddy?”

“Definitely not.”

“D-man?”

“No.”

“Fantastic Mr. D?”

“Leo.”

“What about Bio?”

“Like bio-logical dad?”

“Yeah!” Leo smiled, “That way you’re not really saying you’re her dad and you’re not taking any title away from that other skeleton!”

Eddy just stared at Leo. He swore to god if this kid solved a months long problem just like that he was gonna cuss.

“Alright, Pup, I’ll see if that’s ok.”