#n00b gamer child

[hecallsmehischild]

Recent Media Consumed

Books

The Silmarillion by J.R.R. Tolkien. About ten or fifteen years ago, I tried to read this and was totally overwhelmed by it. I kept it around, hoping maybe someday I might be able to read it. I finally have, and here are my impressions: WHY SO MANY NAMES. WHY YOU HAVE TO NAME EVERYBODY, AND EVERY TRIBE OF PEOPLES, AND EVERY INANIMATE OBJECT, AND EVERY LANDSCAPE FEATURE. WHY. *ahem* So. I have a general comprehension of the events of The Silmarillion, but I dealt with it by doing what you do for an impressionist painting. I (mentally) stepped way back and let all the names flow by me, and if there were names that were repeated a lot, then I mentally attached appropriate plot points and character details to those names so I could track with who they were and what they were doing. And, actually, I found myself able to hang on and enjoy the book for the most part. This is going to lead into a re-reading of the Lord of the Rings books, since I haven’t read those in about as long…

The Hobbit by J.R.R. Tolkien. I haven’t read some of these books since pre-teen years, with one required re-read of The Two Towers in high school (i.e. it’s been many an age since I’ve read these and my memory of the stories has been far more heavily influenced by the movies). In re-reading the first book, I was struck by the extreme tone shift for the Elves and Dwarves. Elves seem much closer to happy, mischievous fairies than these ethereal, solemn pillars of elegance and grace the movies show them to be. And Dwarves are far more bumbling and craftsmanlike than the movies show. Aside from that, The Hobbit was a pretty solid adaptation from the book, and the book also reminded me that this story was the first time I experienced “NO, MAIN CHARACTERS DON’T DIE, HOW DARE YOU,” and probably was the first book to make me cry. I must have been 8 or 10 years old. I FORGOT HOW MUCH THIS STORY INFLUENCED ME.

A Conflict of Visions by Thomas Sowell. I have a longer-than-usual list of things to say about this book. First is that it was just that level of difficult that I was struggling to understand while reading it (on Audible), but I think I got it. Sowell has several base concepts that I see repeated throughout his books, though he does like to dedicate whole books to specific aspects of the same topic. He is pretty damn thorough that way. So, for example, I would put this book in the middle of a three-book spectrum of similar concepts: Intellectuals and Society (most concrete and easiest to read), A Conflict of Visions (next-level abstraction, a little difficult to read), Knowledge and Decisions (root abstract concept, very difficult, I have not been able to get past chapter 2). The second thing I have to say is about a couple interesting concepts it proposes. Its whole point is to help readers understand the roots of two ways of seeing the world that come into severe conflict politically, and he calls them by their root titles: the constrained and the unconstrained visions. He traces the path of each back through the intellectuals that most spoke of them (tending to contrast Adam Smith with William Godwin and Condorcet). Though he leans heavily toward the constrained vision (based on reading his other works) he does his best to make this book an academic study of both, with both of the visions' strengths and flaws and reasoning and internal consistencies fairly laid out. In doing so, he helped me understand a few things that make this situation really difficult for people on opposing sides to communicate. One of them is that root words and concepts literally mean different things to different people. I had some vague notion of this before, but he laid out three examples in detail: Equality, Power, and Justice. It was kind of astounding to see just how differently these three words can be defined. It makes me think that arguing about any specific issues rooted in these concepts is fruitless until first an understanding has been reached on terms, because otherwise two parties are endlessly talking past each other. Another really interesting idea he brought up is the existence of “hybrid visions” and he named both Marxism and Fascism as hybrid visions. This was especially fascinating to me because I have seen the accusation of “Nazi” flung around ad nauseam and I wondered how it was that both sides were able to fling it at each other so readily. Well, it’s because Fascism is actually a hybrid vision, so both sides have a grain of truth but miss the whole on that particular point. In any case, this was a little difficult to read but had some fascinating information. For people who are wondering what on earth this gap is between political visions, how on earth to bridge the gap, or why the gap even exists in the first place, this is a really informative piece.

Movies

The Hobbit & Fellowship trilogies (movies). I mean, it’s definitely not my first watch, not even my second. But I went through it with Sergey this time and that means the run-time is double because we pause to talk and discuss details. This watch came about partly due to Sergey’s contention that Gandalf’s reputation far outstrips his actual powers, so we ended up noting down every instance of Gandalf’s power to see if that was true. Conclusion: Gandalf is actually a decently powerful wizard, but tends to use the truly kickass powers in less-than-dire circumstances. That aside, this movie series was always a favorite for me. I rated The Hobbit trilogy lower the first time I saw it but, frankly, all together the six movies are fantastic and a great way to sink deep into lore-heavy fantasy for a while. And I’m catching way more easter-egg type details after having read the Silmarillion so it’s even more enjoyable. (finally, after about a week of binge-watching) I forgot how much this story impacted me. I forgot how wrenchingly bittersweet the ending is. I forgot how much of a mark that reading and watching this story left on my writing.

Upside-Down Magic. Effects were good. Actors were clearly having fun and enjoying everything. Story didn’t make enough sense for my taste, but it was a decent way to kill flight time.

Wish Dragon. So, yes, it’s basically an Aladdin rewrite, but it’s genuinely a cheesy good fluff fest that made me grin a whole lot.

Plays

Esther (Sight and Sound Theatres). < background info > This is my third time to this theatre. There are only two of these in existence and they only run productions of stories out of the Bible. The first time I went I saw a production of Noah, the second time I saw a production of Jesus. My middle sister has moved all the way out to Lancaster, PA in hopes of working at this theatre. My husband and I came out to visit her. < /background info > So. Esther. They really pulled out all the stops on the costumes and set. I mean, REALLY pulled out all the stops. And the three-quarters wrap-around stage is used to great effect. I tend to have a general problem of not understanding all the words in the songs, but I understood enough. I highly recommend sitting close to the front for immersive experiences. This theatre puts on incredible productions and if you ever, ever, EVER have the opportunity to go, take it. Even if you think it's nothing but a bunch of fairy tales, STILL GO. I doubt you'll ever see a fairy tale produced on another stage with equal dedication to immersion.

Shows

The Mandalorian (first two seasons). Well. This was pretty thoroughly enjoyable. It felt very Star-Wars, and I’d kind of given up after recent movies. Felt like it slipped into some preaching toward the end? Not sure, I could be overly sensitive about it, but I enjoyed this a lot (though I did need to turn to my housemate and ask where the flip in the timeline we were because I did NOT realize that the little green kid IS NOT ACTUALLY Yoda).

Games

Portal & Portal 2. Portal is probably the first video game I ever tried to play, back when I had no idea what I was doing. Back then, I attempted to play it on my not-for-gaming Mac laptop. Using my trackpad. Once the jumping-for-extra-velocity mechanic came into play, I just about lost my mind trying to do this with a trackpad and gave up. Later I returned to the game and played it with my then-boyfriend on a proper gaming computer. Now, after having played several games and gotten better at "reading the language" of video games, I decided I wanted to see if I could beat the Portal games by myself. Guess what. I BEAT 'EM. Yes, I remembered most of the puzzles in Portal so that's a little bit of a cheat, but I'd say a good 2/3 of Portal 2 was new puzzles to me. It is crazy how proud I feel of myself that I could beat Portal 2, especially. Learning how to play video games at this age has really knocked down the lie, "You can't learn anything." Though I still suck at platformers and games that require precision. Since I find those types frustrating, I probably won't be playing many. Games are about enjoyment, so I'll push myself a little, but not to the point where I can't stand what I'm playing.

The Observer. I like the concept and the art but I don't think I could keep trying to play this game. It's really depressing. My in-game family members all died of illness or accident or committed suicide. I also kept getting executed by the state. In order to keep us all alive I'd have to do pretty terrible things that I have a hard enough time contemplating even in a fictional setting.

Baba Is You. Fun and interesting concept, but I got stuck pretty early on. Don't think I want to push as hard on this one.

[catstailtavern]

Genshin impact characters as gamers

Characters: Abedo, Kaeya, Diluc, Childe, Zhongli, Jean, Hu Tao, and Lisa

content warnings: Childe being kinda an asshole lol.

authors note: I might do more in the future! These are just my headcanons so if you don't agree that cool! Feel free to let me know what you think they're like as gamers!!

Albedo:

what they look for in a game: Albedo seems like the type to enjoy games with vast worlds that involve lots of exploration and puzzles. I also feel like he like more quiet gameplay- if that makes any sense. Very much "Show, don't tell." Likes walking simulators!

things that turn them off from a game: He dislikes when games over-explain themselves/their plots. He likes to be able to unfold the mysteries and plot threads himself instead of being spoonfed. He also dislikes voice chat bc people are mean. If there is a VC he mutes basically everyone even if it makes teamwork difficult.

how much time do they devote to videogames: Albedo really only plays videogames on days off or when alchemy research has hit a lull.

a game or games that I think they'd like: outer wilds, shadow of the colossus, and journey.

Kaeya:

what they look for in a game: Story-rich games with unique art that explore heavy topics or philosophical themes! but also really likes multiplayer games where he can troll lol.

things that turn them off from a game: If he dislikes the art he finds it hard to play or pay attention to. This doesn't mean he demands picture-perfect graphics! He's mostly into unrealistic and eye-catching graphics/art he likes games with style and flair!

how much time do they devote to video games: Kaeya likes to play after a long day of work to unwind and relax!

a game or games that I think they'd like: Disco Elysium and the persona series!

Diluc:

what they look for in a game: Diluc is a very busy man who likes to be in control of his life and the things that affect it. Therefore I have come to the conclusion that he likes simple and sweet games with low stakes where he is mostly in control if not basically god haha.

things that turn them off from a game: Games that involve him to be emotionally invested or have lots of stressors are not his thing. Games are played to relieve his stress, not make him cry over character death.

how much time do they devote to video games: He likes to play a little bit on his break when he gets the chance or a little bit after work. Doesn't like to play for too long each day or he feels unproductive!

a game or games that I think they'd like: the sims, planet zoo, my time at Portia, stardew valley, and ANIMAL CROSSING!! (I dont care if this is OOC okay. Diluc plays animal crossing on his lunch break. His favorite villagers are the bird ones. His favorite fruits are apples and cherries, and he loves terraforming his island. He finds it therapeutic.)

Childe:

what they look for in a game: loves gacha games, he's a total whale, and loves to flex his pulls. Also loves games with intense competitive multiplayer and couch co-op games. Absolutely a sore winner who everyone hates playing jack box with.

things that turn them off from a game: Dislikes the story mode of most games bc they usually fail to keep this attention. He'd much rather be making yo mama jokes and shit-talking n00bs over the mic like the little asshole gremlin he is. The only exception so far is "The Last of Us," because of one time when the internet was shitting out on him during matchmaking. He decided to play the story while his connection got itself together and ended up liking it.

how much time do they devote to video games: Stays up late playing them at night a LOT. They're usually the reason he's tired the next day.

a game or games that I think they'd like: mario kart, smash bros, arknights, mortal kombat, apex, and dead by daylight.

Zhongli:

what they look for in a game: Zhongli likes simple games with cute graphics and easy controls. Mostly a mobile gamer as he finds most console game controls confusing. Loves virtual remakes of classic games that he used to play with other people physically.

things that turn them off from a game: Really dislikes first-person shooters. He finds them loud and disorienting. Poor old man.

how much time do they devote to videogames: Barely ever plays, might play while having a cup of tea or to pass the time while waiting for something!

a game or games that I think they'd like: mahjong, solitaire, candy crush, and those lumosity games for training your brain.

Jean:

what they look for in a game: At first when jean thought of video games the only thing that came to mind was "a waste of time." As the acting grand master of the knights of Favonius she rarely has time to socialize or even date. That's when she decided to maybe just maybe give dating sims a shot. She's a bit insecure about it, but they give her butterflies without the strain of a real relationship.

things that turn them off from a game: Really dislikes games that glorify villainy or have you play as the bad guy. She also really hates horror games. Fun fact, she played doki doki literature club but missed the warning somehow and WOW she got really upset-

how much time do they devote to video games: As mentioned previously Jean is a busy gal. So she really only gets to play games on her rare days off or maybe just a little before bed.

a game or games that I think they'd like: I don't know a lot of sweet and fluffy dating sims but I feel like the sweet and fluffy ones are her favorite! I've really only played one dating sim before and that was monster prom so I'm gonna use that for the example lol. I know there's a lot of mischief in that game but she always chooses the more moral upstanding choice even if it cost her a date haha.

Hu Tao:

what they look for in a game: Hu Tao is partial to games with gothic aesthetics and horror elements! Specifically really loves psychological horror and unique creature design. Enjoys difficult gameplay and feels a sense of accomplishment when she succeeds!

things that turn them off from a game: When a game is too easy to play she gets bored rather quickly.

how much time do they devote to video games: Frequently plays really late at night while listening to a paranormal podcast or other spooky content.

a game or games that I think they'd like: Dark souls, Darkwood, The cat lady, rule of rose.

Lisa:

what they look for in a game: Like Childe, Lisa likes competitive gameplay. But she's more into fantasy MMO RPGs! She just really loves fantasy things it doesn't have to be multiplayer. Also really likes games with lots of lore and digs strategy turn-based combat! Other game types she likes are visual novels or anything with a good story-driven narrative. Loves being able to discuss fan theories online in forums.

things that turn them off from a game: Mediocre writing, poor/inconsistent world-building, or a lack of lore. She needs a story to sink her teeth into or she just won't play.

how much time do they devote to video games: Probably plays a lot. Really only pausing to correct people's behavior in the library!

a game or games that I think they'd like: World of Warcraft, Hearthstone, League of legends, Darkest dungeon, and slay the spire.

[millennialdemon]

Summer 2019 First Impressions, The Final Round, Probably!

Alright, I finally checked out the last of the releases on Crunchyroll today... a mercifully mixed bag, this time. 

--Isekai Cheat Magician

Just based on the title alone, it is safe to assume that this is going to be another generic isekai power fantasy. And so it is! 

I don’t know what it is with the isekai genre, but for some reason being shamelessly generic is in itself “subversive” -- look ma, I Know I’m Worthless! I Am Very Clever. Though to be fair, even isekai with “twists” (having a smart phone, being a blob of slime, bringing your mom along with you, etc...) are just as generic despite how hard they try not to be on a surface level. Just Get A Gimmick, And You’re Good To Go! Except that you’re not...

But it turns out that trying to make the gimmick that there isn’t one, also isn’t a great idea. 

It’s almost like stories should be more than a soulless genre piece with some sort of thematically and narratively worthless hook...

I can’t be too mad though. Isekai anime the past few years has been not just generic, but actively and horrifically offensive. This title didn’t have aggressive perverts getting rewarded for their tenacity (That Time I Got Reincarnated As A Slime), 11 year old child slaves in an adult male protagonists harem (this has happened in more than one title), or constant incest and rampant misogyny. Which is the most remarkable thing it has going on. 

Which is terribly sad. So a generous 5/10 for at the very least, not making me run out of my house and into the woods to sit in a shallow river for a while. (And also for having a giant evil goth horse)

--Do You Love Your Mom and Her Two-Hit Multi-Target Attacks?

See above commentary about isekai being generic and awful despite the gimmicks. 

This one is decidedly worse than Isekai Cheat Magician though, because Isekai Cheat Magician didn’t have gross sexualization and clearly fetishistic characterization of the main female character, and didn’t have Genre Aware Narration Cracking Jokes Over Scenes Of Our Teen Boy Protagonist Also Being Genre Aware. A mother who looks 21 at most and is blushing constantly saying are pee gee? and being a n00b is truly the pinnacle of gamer humor, am I right lads...

2/10. Waste of time and whatever heart it is trying to put into its narrative about a teen boy learning to respect his over-bearing mother is completely ruined by fanservice (and awful writing...) 

--Is It Wrong to Try to Pick Up Girls in a Dungeon? Season 2 but for realsies this time!

Last time was an audacious review of the first season, but this time, it’s really happening! Season 2 is here, and there’s so much to say about the upcoming epic narrative potential of a new season of the highly anticipated Danmachi...

Just kidding. It’s the same ugly ecchi as ever, and this time our villain is an over the top whack job that is going to make Bell fight in a “War Game” while approximately twenty-one-thousand-three-hundred-and-fifty-seven bland side characters occasionally say things in the background and Hestia makes weird Hestia noises and I boo and throw tomatoes at my screen when Hermes is there.

But Bete Loga ending that bar fight made my entire month, so 5/10.

--Given

Easily one of the better premieres, and the personal best for me. I’m easy to please when it comes to humble slice of life anime -- though initially I was a little wary because of the shounen ai tag (y’know, because bl anime tend to revel in being as disgusting as possible the majority of the time! Erm... Gay Rights?) but anything that could be read as A Bit Gay in the premiere was mercifully tasteful and charming.

I also tend to like music anime in general, so a down to earth light-hearted drama about a wistful teen with baggage TM joining a band with his musically disenchanted peer sounds like a pretty good anime to me. 8/10.

[thefandomhouse]

[long post]

been reading youtube comment arguments (mistake) about how g//enshin is a bad game with a bad bland story and simplistic gameplay and anyone who enjoys it is an inexperienced child, and h//onkai i//mpact is WAY better and g//enshin is just a passionless moneygrab

and i'd like to address all of those comments here without actually getting into a youtube comment argument bc that would be the biggest mistake of all (trying to censor so this doesn't end up in any tags either, hopefully i succeed)

first off: i'm free to waste my time on anything that brings me real joy and entertainment no matter how "bad" somebody else thinks it is. i'm allowed to have bad taste. we're all allowed to have bad taste. you don't need to be condescending about it. grow up and embrace the cringe.

i'm fully aware that the characters are tropey and the storytelling is hardly the most nuanced or thematically resonant and the pacing is all over the place and the plot is inconsistent. so? i enjoy cheesy anime bullshit. i shrug off plot holes. the characters are charming and--this is important to me--not hypersexualized at every turn. the fact that it comes across almost as a dating sim sometimes makes me laugh, and it never takes it so far that i feel skeeved out. it doesn't take itself too seriously and its humor comes across in the jokes it makes at its own expense. it has enough "dark" elements to offset the silliness and enough sincerity to make those moments hit often enough for me to be genuinely invested. there's more i could say here! which quests i thought were forgettable or had more obvious plot holes, which ones made me fall in love with a character, which ones made me roll my eyes, which ones brought me to tears. it's almost like.......a person can have complex and nuanced opinions about a thing they enjoy without declaring it unambiguously "good" or "bad" on a binary scale? wild

second: the "simplistic characters" thing. ppl keep saying that characters "only have 2 abilities" and are "too simple" as though passive talents, weapon passives, elemental reactions, artifacts, and 4-character team synergy aren't enough to manage. you know what "simple" is? accessible. n00b-friendly. casual-friendly. i'm sorry that y'all are Expert Gamers and yet this game caters to me and my skill level than it does to you and your expectations of 30-branch skill trees

third: idk how these people don't feel the passion in every note of the OST, or the thought and care carved into the landscape. i think the people who designed the cat shrine island were filled with love. i think whoever came up with the frog pedestal hidden in the depths of the Chasm couldn't wait for people to discover their little joke. maybe those commenters never watched the version update streams where the concept artists and developers themselves talked about how much research they did to make in//azuma feel visually diverse yet conceptually unified, from the texture of the stone to the type of tree growing in naru//kami shrine. there's love in every extra line of dialogue tucked into the character menus to let us get to know their history, relationships, interests, hopes, and personality far beyond what we see in quests. believe me, i've played bland, passionless mobile games before (and deleted all of them in short order), and this isn't what they look like. i'm so sorry that the only demonstrations of love you can imagine are character kits and the ever-elusive "endgame content."

fourth: "h//onkai i//mpact is better/has better cutscenes/has a better story." i juuuust barely reached chapter 9 recently after months of forgetting that i "should" play it because it's "better." and yeah, when i finally reached it, the CG kicked ass! it was really cool, with great animation and a character moment that hit decently hard.

but i don't feel like i really...know anyone? until that moment, the characters felt mostly like tropey plot/exposition machines in between samey combat levels with camera controls that fight you at every turn and movement that feels like you're running through water half the time. i kept losing interest and taking weeks to pick up the game again. i hate every time i have to get into one of those slow-ass mechs. not a fan of the space defender levels or the floaty, awkward platformer segments. many of the enemies & missions feel random and decontextualized from the story surrounding them (why did i have to defend supplies during an infiltration mission?). the homescreen UI is an assault on my eyes, as is the fact that i get pop-ups thrown in my face every time i open the game. there are approximately one thousand types of in-game currency at any given time and i have no idea which ones are "standard" and which ones are for events, or where to use them, or where to get them. i hate that stigmata, a type of equipment, just look like more characters, AND that you have to use the gacha to get that equipment. you have to go through 8 menus before you do ANYTHING.

i'm not saying h//onkai is a bad game. on a surface level, it just ain't my jam, fam. if i stick with it, though, it'll probably grow on me, especially if i go out of my way to watch character trailers or read the manga so i actually feel connected to what's happening.

but to be 100% honest, i am simply a bigger fan of fantasy/mythological elements than i ever will be of sci fi and mechs, even though i do enjoy both. g//enshin showed me a giant, six-winged, blue-green dragon within 10 minutes of opening the game and my whole brain got dopey with seratonin. there are gods and illuminated beasts, mischievous spirits and silly tanuki, elementals and giant snakes and ancient ruins and likely more to come with every new real-world culture they take inspiration from. on a level that is fundamental to my very being, i care about all of that SO MUCH MORE than robots and zombies!!! and for a lot of people, i'm sure the exact opposite is true and those people lost their dang minds about getting to shoot missiles in a cool chunky mech. some of my h//onkai nitpicks probably apply to g//enshin to some extent too, but i notice them less because i'm so much more excited about everything that surrounds them.

none of us are incorrect! we just care about different things!!! and that care applies to everything from story structure, to game mechanics, to combat, to the genre itself!

back to the cool CG for a sec tho: the thing about it is that a) it thematically and stylistically matched the rest of the game, and b) it didn't use the game engine. it was 2D anime-style animation.

g//enshin does not have any 2D anime-style animated cutscenes in the game (though it has a recently-released short animated story teaser). all of the major cutscenes that happen in the present USE THE GAME ENGINE, and the cutscenes that are retellings of past events are highly stylized animations that reflect the art and culture of the relevant region. i highly doubt this is a budget issue, or a passion issue, as those commenters claim. it sure seems like a creative choice to me!! maybe i'm wrong and we'll get dramatic anime cutscenes in the future, but honestly i feel like that style would be kind of jarring to see in-game, especially if it replaces what is usually a pretty smooth transition from gameplay to game-engine cutscene.

and the game engine thing is important to me!! i can't tell you how many times i've seen a genuinely cool promotion for a game that ends up looking absolutely nothing like how it was advertised, with gameplay that feels even more stilted and limiting as a result of unmet expectations. (looking at you, LoL. if only you were as cool as all your promo material.) but g//enshin really looks Like That ALL THE TIME, albeit with more canned animations in standard gameplay.

meanwhile, h//onkai's genre and environment are well suited to those flashy 2D animations IN ADDITION to having a game engine that (as far as i'm aware) is NOT well-suited to portraying complex character expressions or dynamic environmental interactions. i could very well be wrong about this (i'm not on the dev team! obviously!), but it's potentially easier/less expensive to animate a whole scene like that in 2D than it would be to make it look good in the game engine.

idk if h//onkai really is the company's "favorite child" or whatever but i'm preeeeeetty sure there are more factors deciding what format the cutscenes take than just "they like the other game better."

fifth: there were also comments that boiled down to "they make a lot of money so they should be able to just Instantly Get Good," which is both a supremely ignorant take and demonstrably untrue (see: every argument about recent pok//emon games). i mean, i don't really know how the game development process works, but i'm pretty sure it's not some sim game where you click a button to instantly upgrade all your employees so they can produce the next quality tier of products. shit takes time to create! people need experience! apparently it took the devs a long ass time just to make sure Chi//lde's flowy cape didn't break the fucking game! i know it feels like there are long stretches with nothing to do but realistically speaking these updates/characters/events are coming out at BREAKNECK speed.

lastly: there are tons of perfectly valid complaints about g//enshin! it is far from perfect. i'm not gonna defend the artifact grinding system bc the artifact RNG is an absolute endless nightmare, no question. and i agree that the endgame content is lackluster at best, though personally idk what form i would want ongoing content to take. randomly generated co-opable dungeons maybe? i dunno! i just know not everybody likes fishing and mining as much as i do.

there's also the issue of the "empty world," which is less a g//enshin-specific problem and more about the inherently transient nature of exploration--like alb//edo mentioned in a quest one time, actually: once the unknown becomes known, interest fades, and what was once exciting becomes boring. b/ot/w had the same problem (arguably to a greater extent), but it was less noticeable for a lot of people because the story had a finite end, whereas g//enshin is ongoing. i don't think there's a real solution to this; it's just the nature of an open-world game released in pieces. we will always consume content so much faster than the creators can research, design, program, test, and implement it.

that was a whole lot of rambling to no one in particular (well, multiple people in particular, but no one i want to actually talk to) but it all boils down to this:

if you do not love this game--if you find the story bland, the characters boring, the gameplay overly simplistic, the world passionless, and the endgame empty--why the FUCK are you in the comments of a video about it? how did you even REACH endgame if you were so fucking bored the whole time? did you really spend weeks, if not months of your life on something that you apparently view with nothing but disdain, enough to throw contempt at anyone who genuinely enjoys it? was there nothing you loved, nothing that captured your attention? is it really the g//enshin devs who are loveless and passionless, or are you just projecting?

[hecallsmehischild]

Recent Media Consumed

Books

The Road to Wigan Pier by George Orwell. First, I actually appreciated the foreward to the “Left Book Club” copy, even though it says that anyone who is not a member should disregard it. It gave an interesting rebuttal to parts of the book. That aside, I’m not totally sure what to make of the book. On the level of descriptive writing, I rarely find something this richly penned. But it’s loaded with concepts and lingo and even a monetary system I’m unfamiliar with, and that hampers my understanding of the points. I get the general gist, but all the finer points are very lost on me, simply because I’m an American millennial.

The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F*ck by Mark Manson. I’ve seen the “F*ck” series titles floating around here and there, and I’m intrigued by a couple of them. The idea of this one is that people give way too many f*cks about everything, and that you really need to pick where you give your f*cks in life and never give a f*ck about anything that doesn’t line up with your values (in a nutshell). It’s an easy and interesting read. It’s interesting to me that, in the wake of what I hear was many years of positive-mood and high self-esteem type self help books (most of which I’ve only heard of and never read, were they before my time?), we’re getting a backlash of “Yes, life sucks. Yes, life has pain. Dealing with pain and failure appropriately is a part of life. Accept that, or lose yourself to complete entitlement” type self-help books. I’m curious what this trend produces in people over time. I’d also like to highlight that this book has the best discussion of dividing “fault” and “responsibility” that I’ve ever read.

Shows

Loki. WHAT EVEN. WHAT EVEN. WHAT. WHAT THE. WHAT THE. FRESH… THE FRICK FRACK PADDYWHACK???!!!

Mushi-shi. So, turns out the first time I watched this I somehow started on Season 2, and my source cut out before the season end… no wonder I was pretty confused. So I started re-watching this and… I remember how incredibly unsettling this anime is. It’s equal parts gentle wonder and soft horror, a blend that is very difficult to describe unless you’ve seen it. Much like Mushi themselves, eh? I think I’ll balance this out by ending each watch session with an episode of Log Horizon rewatch. That’ll keep the emotional balance intact.

Claymore. I ended up dropping this one halfway through. It has an interesting concept, but the “things that bug me” points mounted pretty fast. In the early episodes, everything is so dark that it’s hard to see what’s going on. There’s a huge amount of monologuing and info-dumping IN monologue, and this goes on even mid-fight, and even CALMLY mid-fight. Yes, this isn’t the only anime that does this, but it decreases my enjoyment. It’s difficult to take the story seriously when the big bad yells, “Why can’t I defeat you?” to the weakest-but-somehow-also-the-strongest member of a team, and then have a colleague of the team member calmly explain to the big bad exactly why he’s unable to land a blow, then they take off his head together. This show has a lot of that sort of thing. I’ll read up on how the series ended, not interested in slogging through the other half.

Elfen Lied. This is a re-re-rewatch for me. I stumbled on this anime when I was newly inducted into anime-watching and, well... given that Princess Tutu was my very first anime, this one was a real shock to my system at first. By all accounts I should have dropped it and run screaming at the time, but I couldn’t. There was something about the sheer tragedy of the story that called to me. Plus it was VERY short. So I returned to it from time to time. Now that I’ve developed more of a feel for what I do and don’t like in a story, how does this hold up? The relationships are terrible, imo, and the whole thing about diclonius is never explained enough (and I still don't understand the ending) but it's STILL hard not to be pulled in by the sheer tragedy of the series.

Movies

300. I haven’t seen this movie since college. Is it weird how much I enjoyed it as a romp? Yes, there’s death and tragedy, but the dry humor and utter gung-ho-edness of it is infectious. It’s a good flick, I’m really glad I went back to see it. And I also finally understand Leonidas telling the traitor, “May you live forever.” Damn, man. No wonder he flinched.

Weathering With You. GORGEOUS. I need to see more by this animator… LIGHT. WATER. FOOD. I hear they’re calling this person the new Miyazaki? I CONCUR. And the story is sweet and beautiful and just yes. Yes. Oh, look, he made something else before this movie…

Your Name. Okay so I have mixed feelings about this one. On the one hand, fantastic story and, once again, gorgeous animation that all makes me want to track with this creator in the future. And the twist definitely socked me in the gut, I didn’t see it coming. On the other hand, I feel like this movie hits an extreme of “show, don’t tell” in a way that comes awfully close to a negative. I didn’t think that was possible, but this movie switches timelines, POV, points in time, etc, so rapidly that it becomes difficult to keep track of what’s going on, properly. I could not imagine watching this movie in theaters, it has to be watched with a remote in hand to pause, rewind, rewatch, discuss what the heck just happened. It’s like watching Mystery Skulls videos, with that level of rapid fire little details that are incredibly important to the plot, but for a feature length film. Also, after some discussion, I came to see (and agree) that there’s a foundational issue in the main relationship that doesn’t bode well for the future, as much as I rooted for them to be together. Still, it’s an incredible movie and I can see why it was the highest grossing movie for Japan a few years back.

Games

Diablo II. I’m really happy. I live in a house with my husband and his best friend, and in the past year or so we’ve begun playing games together. This is the sort of game I would never have gone to on my own because I actually need someone in the room who I can ask, “Hey, how do you assign attacks again?” or “Hey, is this piece of gear better than the piece I’m wearing?” I don’t like playing the number game on gear so much, but I let the two of them dress my character up and then I back them up in a fight and enjoy myself. Looting and exploring for treasure is probably my favorite aspect (says the person who plays Breath of the Wild just to forage for mushroom and herbs), although as a level 20 Amazon I’m now shooting out waves of 8 arrows at a time, and that’s pretty epic too. It’s a special kind of joy to find out you actually like a type of gaming as long as there’s people there who can explain things along the way and who don’t get annoyed at re-asked questions. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’m having a blast playing Diablo II in a group. And as for the other game we play together as a group…

WoW Classic. I covered this before, but back then I was a lowly level 17 Dwarf Hunter. Now I’m a lowly level 36 Dwarf Hunter. With a mount! I have epic skills like explosion traps, poisonous shots, and multi-shot. My wolf has gained a ton more skills, too, and is (or so I’m told) a pretty effective off-tank. I have been told I am an effective DPS person, which makes me very happy. I really enjoy this kind of gaming, but specifically when I’m in the same room as the people I’m gaming with. Communication is a lot easier and we work really well as a team that way.

[hecallsmehischild]

Recent Media Consumed

Books

War Nerd by Gary Brecher. I have a lot of conflicting feelings about this book. First off, I had to try three times to read it, because the first two times I read it, I was in an emotionally unstable period, and this is NOT a book to read in emotionally unstable periods. On the third try, I blew right through it. Second thing is about the way it’s written. On the one hand, I wish all history texts were written with HALF the color and vigor and humor of this writer, because I would have retained way more information. On the other hand, it was incredibly difficult for me to come to terms with this style of angry, bitter humor combined with a worldview I can’t really understand. Which, I suppose, leads into some of my major take-aways from this book: human nature is not basically good (I already believed that, but this is a pretty good secular argument for it), human nature seems to crave war and peace is the exception, and there literally are people in the world who I will never understand no matter how hard I try because they want things that are antithetical to absolutely everything I deem important. I don’t mean minor things or even the things we all know come into conflict, like religion. I’m talking about things like peace. If you look at what peoples’ actions tell you over their words, it seems like some people (individuals AND nation groups) genuinely thrive on death and war, and that that was in fact the state of things for far longer than attempts at peace. It’s a difficult book on all fronts (except readability, it’s quite readable and certainly more enjoyable than most history texts as I’ve said), but it makes you think. I also can’t speak for how accurate this book is, but it is written by someone who clearly has a hyperfixation, so...

Inside The Robe by Katherine Mader. Judge Mader, a criminal court judge in LA County, kept a court diary throughout 2016. This book is the result of that diary, and is her attempt at giving an “insider’s view” on being a criminal court judge. She is a colorful writer with very clear descriptions and a distinctive voice. This book was a pleasure to read and gave me a better understanding of the incentives and constraints on judges through her daily vignettes.

Economic Facts and Fallacies by Thomas Sowell. I read this in the wake of my second reading of Basic Economics and thought this would be a good follow-up read. There’s a lot of overlap here, but this book delves more in-depth into some concepts that Sowell had to give less attention to in Basic Economics for the sake of providing a broader overview. As usual, there are some concepts that get a little too abstract for me to hang onto very well, but the majority of his work is very understandable and makes sense to me. I am grateful for the clarity with which he writes.

A Man of Letters by Thomas Sowell. This is actually a good accompaniment to his memoir, A Personal Odyssey. He collects several letters he wrote (and a few select ones addressed to him) to sketch his reactions to various events in his life. He has quite the dry wit. It was a treat to get a further glimpse into his life.

Books I had to drop and why

Battles of the Bible by Chaim Herzog and Mordechai Gichon. Sometimes I have to admit I made a mistake and not keep trying to force myself to spend time on a book I’m not enjoying. I thought perhaps this book would help me understand some context of the Biblical stories more, but really what this is is comprehensive step-by-step war strategy (complete with diagrams and TERRAIN MAPS) of each battle in the Old Testament. And… that’s not what I’m looking for.

The Road to Serfdom by Friedrich Hayek. I’m kind of sad about this one. Thomas Sowell has referenced Hayek reverently and I was told The Road to Serfdom would be a good read for me. Unfortunately what I’m coming to understand is that it’s very difficult for me to grasp ideas when talked about ONLY in the abstract. This is why Sowell is usually a much better read for me, because he tends toward giving concrete examples, so after about 3 chapters of barely getting what Hayek wanted to convey, I switched over to…

Marxism by Thomas Sowell. And I was also crestfallen here. From the fragments I gather, Marx (who Sowell studied extensively and followed wholeheartedly in his college days) broke things down almost exclusively to their most abstract concepts before building back toward concrete ideas and tended to look down on any economist who only examined things as they appeared. Prior to this I had some vague notion that maybe I could eventually read Marx and understand the root texts of socialism/communism, but according to Sowell, there’s a lot of pre-requisite reading involved in really understanding what Marx & Engels were talking about. He also criticized most interpreters of not bothering to do their homework on surrounding texts and that many have mangled some of Marx’s points. I was not able to make it past chapter two of this book because I was floundering pretty hard. It’s a little discouraging to feel the limits of my comprehension so sharply. I’m going to take a break with some fiction.

Video Games

Bendy and the Ink Machine. Want to talk about being late to the bandwagon? I mean, I got on the bandwagon when everyone was talking about it, but then I got through chapter 3 and there was a graphics reboot, so I started playing from the top and then kind of… dropped off? Never got past chapter 3. Finally, I felt like I was in a good place and could take the jump scares, so I blasted through the first three chapters in about a night. Then for the next couple days I played through the last two chapters. I have to say, chapter 4 is my favorite and has probably the most disturbing image that, while disturbing, was epic and fantastic in its own creepy way (merry-go-round-and-round, anybody?). I didn’t really understand the ending, but there were some interesting theories to be found on Youtube about what it all means. This was an enjoyable game for someone like me who can’t really handle high level horror and isn’t too adept with controls because it had simple controls and the horror was… toned down, I’d say. I played through Soma and I tried (and absolutely ditched) Amnesia, and Bendy is at about the level of horror I can deal with. Good game.

Confess My Love. Started and ditched it. I was very, very annoyed at the girl by five rejections. In the end, I rejected HER by uninstalling the game.

Movies

Wolfwalkers. *inarticulate noises* f-f-found family…. nnngh…. *gentle sobbing*

[hecallsmehischild]

Recent Media Consumed

Games

The First Tree. So, I’ve concluded that this game is not for me, but that doesn’t mean it’s bad. If anything, I’ve found it at the wrong time in my life. This is clearly a game meant to help people process grief, and I might recommend that anyone who is going through grief and loss give it a try. It might help.

Portal 2: Co-op version. SO. I can’t believe neither of us realized this… but around the same time, my husband and I realized that for years we’d both “figured we’d never get to play the co-op version of Portal 2.” HAHAHAH. We kind of sat there, stunned for a moment, and immediately dove in. MUCH FUN. And sometimes Glados has different dialogue for each player, trying to pit us against each other. Lovely extension of the game.

Books

The Housing Boom and Bust by Thomas Sowell. This was one where I didn’t understand everything, but the parts that I understood helped clarify a lot. My parents were one of the couples suckered by an institution that knew how to take advantage of the loopholes and risky creative home re-financing procedures described by Sowell. I have hazy memories of the situation because I didn’t care for finances and didn’t understand what was happening. I appreciated how Sowell tackled the failings of both political parties in this whole debacle, and the way he describes it, it stretches backwards and forwards and I can see the pattern and it is dismal and depressing. At the same time, very useful to know. It’s fairly readable and on the shorter side of his works. Very useful read.

Nutcracker and Mouse King/The Tale of the Nutcracker by E.T.A. Hoffmann/Alexandre Dumas. These two versions of the Nutcracker fairytale were paired in a Penguins Classic volume, along with a helpful introductory. I have to say that, though Hoffman’s is the original, I understand Dumas’ version far more easily. Maybe it’s a translation issue or maybe it really is a drastic difference in writing. Either way, it was interesting to read the roots of the George Ballanchine ballet I grew up watching, and getting a heavy dose of “author’s intent” lecture in the introduction.

Clara & The Nutcracker by T.K. Merchant (Jessica Kalei Sheffield). I was pointed in the direction of this story that someone had written as a follow-up to the Nutcracker story. First, I had to read the original Nutcracker story (as seen in the previous point) and then I read through this. I have mixed feelings. On the one hand, I feel this story could have benefitted from more editing work. On the other hand, I have bittersweet pangs of jealousy reading what is clearly a published (and legal) fanfiction. It’s a good story with a solid core that (IMO) just needs some more spit and polish.

12 Rules for Life by Jordan Peterson. At this point I’ve seen enough of his lectures that I’m starting to get a real feel for what he says and believes in general. That being said, this was still a very polished and condensed version of it, and well worth reading. I think I was dragged into an alley and MUGGED by his chapter about friendship. It was a big, “Ow. But. True,” feel. Some of his chapters are straightforward and concrete and some are more abstracted, so this book ranges from chapter to chapter in terms of ease in reading comprehension. This book is geared more toward chaotic type people like me. Now I’m curious what he has to say to the more orderly type people. *eyes the other book*

A Conflict of Visions by Thomas Sowell. This was interesting. It was probably medium difficulty to read because it did deal with abstract concepts but grounded them pretty thoroughly in examples and historical references. Though it’s likely clear which vision Sowell ascribes more to, this work (as far as I can tell) is an academic look at the roots, paths, strengths, and weaknesses of the political divide. I think this is a good “bridging the gap” book because it does attempt to thoroughly lay out why each side is self consistent in its beliefs and behaviors. I think it is a read that leads to deeper understanding of both sides.

The Quest for Cosmic Justice by Thomas Sowell. This is a collection of essays that overlaps other works of his (Intellectuals and Society, A Conflict of Visions, etc) but focuses on this one aspect. It is definitely not unbiased, but it’s very readable.

Movies

Loving Vincent. I’d heard about this movie, off and on, for a long time. Is it too low of a pun to say, “This movie is art”? I mean… this movie is animation… but with HAND PAINTED OILS. In the style of Van Gogh. How even??? And the dialogue is pretty good, too. There’s a lot of emotion conveyed in this film, both through the visuals and story of it all. And the flashback scenes are, sometimes, nearly photorealistic in their style. I also love how you have to piece together who Vincent was through many different peoples’ memories of him, not all flattering. It is a painful movie to watch, and ends with the iconic song dedicated to Vincent. This is quality cinema.

Missing Link. I really shouldn’t have put watching this off for so long. Laika studio’s stop motion gets smoother EVERY. FRIGGIN. FILM. Gosh… I have to believe some of these shots were just them showing off, seriously. Once you are looking for it, you can see some scenes that are just there because they’re impressive under the circumstances of it being STOP. MOTION. But they’re done well enough that they don’t detract even a tiny bit from the quality of the film (as opposed to situations where I’ve seen some films do 3D effects very intrusively). So, all that said, I didn’t enjoy the story as much. Cardboard villainy isn’t as fun for me as it used to be, so my enjoyment of the story isn’t as high as for other Laika films, but it's good for one watch through.

[hecallsmehischild]

Recent Media Consumed

Books

A Knot in the Grain and Other Stories by Robin McKinley. Not bad for a fantasy short story compilation, but as I read the stories I felt like too many questions went unanswered, or the answer wasn’t clear enough. I know there’s an art to not answering questions and making that intentional, but I didn’t pick up the feeling of the author being intentionally vague. It was still fun to read. I’m really just in a fantasy binge mode.

Fire and Water by Robin McKinley and Peter Dickinson. Both books are collections of short stories based on elemental spirits. Eh…. they were okay. Didn’t like them as much as the others.

Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky. Hard book to get through. There’s so much monologuing and it doesn’t all make sense to me. People seem to be talking trite nonsense half the time and then being unbearably deep the other half. It is an interesting look at morbid aspects of the human heart. Might be that it’s a bit over my head to appreciate fully, but I’d like to read at least one more by this author. Maybe The Brothers Karamazov.

Movies

Hello Dolly. (mini liveblogging of reactions) There are way too many musicals I have not gotten around to seeing, simply because I have old favorites and sometimes it’s hard to get out of a rut. I am two minutes and four seconds in and CLEARLY not watching this before now was a failure on my part. I am in awe of the opening sequence that is just a series of legs and feet, but they are all moving to the music and they tell a dozen different stories that are very easy to understand even without seeing anybody’s top half, this is EXCELLENT framing and shooting and I feel like I’m in for a real treat. (In the middle of “It takes a woman”) I cannot tell you how much I missed over the top satire. This very much has the feel of My Fair Lady’s “With A Little Bit of Luck”. But then it’s taken up by the protagonist with an entirely different tone and WHAM the feels hit. I’m not enjoying all of the musical numbers, but there’s this one bit in the middle of the song about dancing where Dolly accepts a dance invitation from the grizzled old groundskeeper, and seeing this high-class looking widow take his invitation without a shred of irony, and to see him take her dancing in such a way that shows he’s clearly done this for many years and may be a widower himself, it’s just this strange sweet kind of moment that’s meant to be savored. And then again WHAM this high class widow, whenever she has a musical number in private, just NAILS you with her song and performance and all her emotions. Barbara Streisand was incredible, absolutely incredible. A lot of the other characters don’t really feel real, they feel like Musical People. She slips on the clothes of a Musical Person but then she drops the facade and shows you how hard all this is for her and it’s incredible. The movie is worth it just to watch HER. Even if it is very stressful watching her manipulate conversations and move people around like pawns. I have to say I do not, for the life of me, understand why she wants a relationship with Mr. Horace Vandergelder, or why he agrees. They look like they’ll make each other miserable for life.

Honest Thief. I went in with low “dumb robbery movie” expectations and was pleasantly surprised. I think I was most surprised by the fantastic chemistry of the couple and pretty much everyone’s acting. Aside from the acting it wasn’t anything remarkable, but everyone took it up to the next level. Nice flick. Also it tickles me to hear the voice of Aslan talking about how he carried out perfect robberies.

Nezha. Holy. Cow. Okay it doesn’t make total sense to me, not all the way through, but I chalk that up to missing cultural/lit knowledge and translation issues. Setting that aside, animation was gorgeous. Story was fun, but also compelling. There was some gross-out humor, but I’ve seen worse. And the climactic fight scene? Man. It went SO LONG but I didn’t even care. Some fight scenes drag on, but this one could have been twice as long and I would have been fine with that. The creators of this film really went all out with creativity and variety all throughout the film. I don’t totally understand the ending but I would love to see more (as the credits scenes hinted that there might be more). Oh wait, there is more and it’s called Jiang Ziya…

The Mitchells vs The Machines. This movie was so full of heart and also so full of complete over the top dumb goofiness. It kind of reminded me of Despicable Me in that way. Definitely brought a smile to my face.

Shows

Star vs the Forces of Evil. I had to re-watch through Eclipsa’s and Meteora’s arc because I’d seen that much before, but too long ago to remember. I re-watched it, then settled in for the last season which I hadn’t seen before. Watching through the new content and… I’m… disappointed. Story seems to be all over the place. The conflict is so forced it hurts. People are flatter than flat. And they’re all idiots. I feel like the show is trying to reach for a moral and don’t even know what that is from episode to episode. Wow. And as I go into the final arc, it just gets worse. Ham-fisted with zero focus and twists out of the bloody blue that make zero sense. You know… this series was hard to get into because characters were annoying and gross at the start. But then it added depth to each character and made me care about them as it went along. But everything after Eclipsa became queen has flushed all of that down the toilet as fast as possible and it is maddening to see that story-trust wasted. Nothing means anything in this story, that’s the conclusion I end up coming to. Nothing means anything and there is nobody worth caring about. I am radically disappointed. And kind of angry at the sheer number of levels at which the storytelling became terrible.

Games

Legend of Zelda: Link’s Awakening. I wasn’t sure how I’d handle another controller-based game after getting so accustomed to Breath of the Wild (I’m on a second re-play of that, I play it whenever my brain is on the fritz so badly that I can’t do anything else). But it turned out to be pretty easy to get into. The hardest part is getting stuck about how to solve certain puzzles and trying to figure it out over and over. Sometimes I figure it out, but sometimes I need to look up a hint online. I’m almost at the end of the game and I’ve enjoyed it quite a bit. I want to play more Zelda games...

Katamari Re-Roll. This is so stupid. I mean, SO VERY STUPID. And so much fun. You start off as this tiny little person just rolling a ball around and you can pick up anything smaller than you (thumbtacks, coins, caramel candies) and as your ball gets bigger, your options open up (mice, carrots, eggs, crabs) and open up (shoes, toys, cats, dogs) and open up (humans, food carts, cows). I hear you get to roll up houses at some point. I’m looking forward to that. For now I’m at the level where I’m rolling up a lot of people. They’re all wiggly and shrieky. It’s funny. There’s a time limit on each level, and you have to reach a certain size by the time limit, which is the only really annoying thing about it. But I’m still having a lot of fun.

World of Warcraft: Classic. Of all the games I never thought I’d play, this is probably toward the top of the list. I don’t like the concept of grinding. I like story. But after playing Breath of the Wild, I also found out that I love exploration/open world type games. My husband helped me build a character and we ran around doing quests and levelling up. Now I’m a level 17 Dwarf hunter who does skinning and leatherworking. I have a pet wolf named Chompers. I’m having a lot of fun. Probably not obsessive levels of fun, but enough fun that I’m happy to sink a couple several-hour sessions a week into playing.

[hecallsmehischild]

Recent Media Consumed

Books

Half Bad, Half Wild, and Half Lost by Sally Green. Re-read Half Bad so I got all the details down, then blew through the next two books. Well. Doesn’t get any more light-hearted. Ending is super bittersweet, and I’d say heavier on the bitter. There’s a beauty to the story, but there’s so very much despair and blood and torture and… *glances back at my fanfics*… yeah, well… this… feels like it’s right up my alley for sure.

The Rational Bible: Genesis by Dennis Prager. Occasionally I find myself leaping up and yelling, “Oh no, absolutely not, that’s not what that meant! How even…?” Occasionally I shake my head or shrug at lesser disagreements. But overall? Very informative. I wish some arguments were more in depth, or made with more clarity, or were backed up more, but the chicken I’m finding is rather good. *tosses out the bones*

The Brothers Karamazov by Fyodor Dostoevsky. I read Dostoevsky’s Crime and Punishment and this book, and it’s hard to read these books without wondering why nearly every character in the cast seems to be on the verge of a mental breakdown. Again, there are very long monologues that are often spoken with a sense of mania, completely unfocused and barely coming back around to the speaker’s point. I don’t know if this is a literary style? Or if people in Russia were like this during the time period Dostoevsky was writing about? Or what… but after trying his work for two books, I don’t particularly enjoy it and will not be pursuing further titles by him. I do get the feeling I’m missing something, here, and that this probably is an important piece of literature, but that doesn’t make me magically “get” it.

Movies

The Marksman. Usually action movies like this aren’t MY pick, they’re Sergey’s pick when it’s his turn to choose what we watch, but often I end up enjoying his pick anyway. No exception here. We joke that Liam Neeson is “Jack Bauer Lite” and tends to play that role in most of his movies, but this one went a little deeper. I’m still trying to figure out where I stand on the immigration issues, and what I like about this movie is that it implies problems/asks questions with all sides of the issue. Nobody, not even the cartel villain (by the end), is a complete cardboard cutout. The situation is screwed up and complex and difficult, and this movie gives a taste of that. I really like that. Almost feel like it could be a good conversation starter for this topic. That aside, the writing was pretty good for the most part, too. There was one point where I was unclear how the villains found our protagonists again (felt a little too magically accurate), but aside from that every step was reasonably explained and accounted for, so on the storytelling end this was also quite good. Much like 24, the movie made me step back from my self appointed moral high ground on several points and ask myself, “Okay, but what if that was me? What do I choose to do in this situation?”

The Founder. Dramatization about the guy who made McDonalds what it is today. My thoughts: Human communication is ridiculous and difficult. If you can manage not to hate the protagonist anti-hero for the cut-throat way he maneuvers, you may be able to see glimpses of admirable things in him. Even moments where you know he’s right and the other person is wrong. But that happens for almost every character in this situation, you see where they’re right and also wrong. You see where peoples’ goals aren’t necessarily bad, but misaligned with each other so badly that it ends in burned bridges all over. On the acting front, this is stellar. There’s a bit near the beginning where three men are in a restaurant, talking about how they started their first burger stand, and the way they speak is nearly poetry for its rhythm and beat and back-and-forth. On the one hand I was thinking, “Nobody talks like this. It’s impossible to finish sentences for each other so perfectly like this.” On the other hand, “They sound like a routine. It’s nearly musical to hear.” If you can manage the stress of watching peoples’ goals be at loggerheads, then some rise while others crash’n’burn. If you can stomach this kind of anti-hero (who is also a stellar actor). Then you might enjoy this.

Munich. *long inhale, long exhale* So. In the 1972 olympics, in Munich, most of the Israeli team was captured and held hostage by Palestinians. Rescues were botched, and all hostages died. This movie, Munich, picks up directly after when Israel launched Operation Wrath of God to assassinate everyone connected with orchestrating this situation. This movie follows one of the teams. You see some of the targets and their humanity. You see the team members slowly fall apart with guilt or PTSD or doubt. Even the confident leader of this team comes back with much less of himself than he started. It’s heavy. There’s a whole lot of blood and nudity. It’s not your typical action film where everything’s clear cut about who’s virtuous and who’s evil. It’s something more complex than that, and I respect it for that. I also would like to curl up with some fantasy for a while because the world is cruel.

Luca. I was lucky enough to see this when I was in a full on downswing. I say lucky because watching this film was enough to derail me from the downswing and restore me to normalcy by the mid-point. It’s colorful. It’s simple. It’s delightful. Santa Mozzerella, was this one a joy to watch.

Shows

Wandavision. I enjoyed this on several levels. I love the comparison of sitcoms from decade to decade, and the slow reveal was unsettling all throughout. The implications of Wanda’s mind control are fully explored and it is pretty horrifying. I didn’t really understand what happened with Vision toward the end, but aside from that, very enjoyable watch.

Games

Superliminal. Oh this was a fun game. Definitely creepy at times, but fun. I caution people who get simulator sickness easily (like me) to play around with the mouse sensitivity on this one. This has a combination Stanley Parable and Portal-like feel to it, exploring the dream state in a puzzle-solving situation. Really cool idea.

[hecallsmehischild]

Recent Media Consumed

Books

The Ocean at the End of the Lane by Neil Gaiman. Wow. Chilling fairy tale. Beautiful. Immersive. Otherworldly. You don’t get to fully understand everything, and that’s exactly how it should be, in this story’s case.

Out of the Fog: Moving from Confusion to Clarity after Narcissistic Abuse by Dana Morningstar. I continue to read through some books about personality disorders and the relationship fallout from being connected with these people. This book, after “Healing from Hidden Abuse” by Shannon Thomas, has been the second most helpful to me so far. At first, it wasn’t giving me much new information. But as the chapters went on, it offered me two really valuable things. First, it offered me many stories from people who had been through these situations, including a few who had been through it in friendships (it’s hard to find literature covering abusive friendships). Second, it offered a lot of explanation of terms. For example, it defined what a healthy friendship is and is not. It contrasts a lot of terms it explains, too, like, “Boundaries versus fortressing,” or “Partner versus target,” etc. It explained the concept of “fleas” (problematic behaviors that abuse victims may have picked up from abusers that can be gotten rid of with careful attention, as opposed to “catching narcissism” or thinking you’ve become the same as the abuser) and introduced many other concepts I found helpful. Frankly, this is a good book to read whether you’ve been through an abusive relationship or not, because it’s also an educational tool for people looking for good friends or trying to enter the dating pool. I strongly recommend this book as a good read for emotional and social education.

The Tragedy of Islam by Imam Mohammad Tawhidi. Not sure all of what to say, here. It’s interesting, but also difficult for someone who isn’t very familiar with Islam to track along with. I had to do a lot of context mining to understand who various people were in relation to each other, and a lot of the moments where the author tried to make a serious point, I didn’t understand the weight behind it because I had no familiarity with the players. At the same time, my husband and I pushed through reading it and understood it for the most part. It sends me back to issues in my own beliefs, where the original documents are in a language I can’t read and don’t want to learn, so whose words do I trust on it? Many people CAN read those documents, but who is and isn’t lying? I will say, there is some weight to the fact that this book has over 20 pages of citations (that’s over 500 citations for references listed in this book). For now, not basing all my opinions/learning on this book, but holding it as a piece to consider as I move forward in general-knowledge reading.

On Deck: The Medium-SIzed Book of Zim Scripts vol 1 by Eric Trueheart, The Art of Invader Zim, Intellectuals and Society by Thomas Sowell.

Movies

Hoaxed. This is bleak. And hard. And makes me just want to disconnect and live in the woods.

A Whisker Away. I’m a little conflicted. On the one hand, I’m disturbed by the stalkerish behavior of the main character. On the other hand, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a character quite this level of expressive in anime before, and I really enjoy the 250% capacity she emotes at. I also enjoy the magical story quite a bit. I… dislike most of the people. However I can’t say these character types don’t exist in real life, so this is in no way a bad story, or bad characterization, I just have trouble rooting for them. I still enjoyed it overall, though.

Silence of the Lambs. Was obsessed with seeing it as a child for some reason. Wised up about my visual limits by teenagehood. Watched it recently for the first time. Not as gory as I thought, definitely disturbing. Interesting movie. The characters, man. The characters. What do you even say? Frightening and fantastic.

Hamilton. So I was not very invested in the first third. The narrative was a lot more scattershot than I’m used to, but it started really coming together after that, and it straight up murdered me during “It’s Quiet Uptown.” I know this is fictionalized history but tell me human history isn’t exactly this tragic, splintered by millions of large and small bad decisions. I hurt all over by the end of it, and I did not expect that at all.

Where The Red Fern Grows (2003). I had no idea there was a remake. The old version was an utterly traumatic part of my childhood that I rewatched many times because, apparently, I liked the heartbreak it brought me. This new version was pretty good. It didn’t especially move me, but I thought the hunt in the storm was a bit more intense and certainly the camera was more adept at catching close-ups of frantic, scurrying raccoons. Now I’m wondering how the old one holds up…

Games

Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild. I did it. A complete non-gamer beat Ganon. I’m so psyched. I want to play it all over again in a few months. It’s beautiful. It’s fun. It taught me my way around a controller. I want to play more…

On deck: Yes, Ant, Psychonauts. ;)

[hecallsmehischild]

Recent Media Consumed

Movies

Violet Evergarden: Eternity and the Auto Memory Doll. I was disappointed by the movie. If they had taken this concept and developed a new season around it, it might have had way more emotional impact, but I felt like we either didn’t have enough context to understand the weight of certain decisions or (more likely) we were given situations that were shoe-horned for the emotional drama and conflict they can bring, without any good reason behind them. That being said, it was fun seeing characters doing what characters do, and this show has gorgeous animation that was lovely to watch. Good eye candy, frustrating story.

Books

Basic Economics by Thomas Sowell. This was recommended to me by my housemate. I started reading it March 14th and it took me until June 6 to finish it. The beginning was a lot easier to understand than I thought it would be, but as I struggled through the middle, I realized it was best to take it slow with these concepts. I listened for a short segment, then set it aside and did something completely different, then came back to it days or weeks later to continue. I will likely be doing a re-read of this at some point, but I think I’ve got the gist from this first reading. If the Freakonomics books helped me look at “Where are the incentives pointing?” then this book hammers in the concept of “limited resources that have alternative uses” and all the implications that stem from that. I found it to be worth the time it takes to understand it. My takeaways are that, and the idea that it is impossible to remove the concept of cost from existence, it is only possible to transfer cost, and that this covers much more than just situations that have to do with money.

Intellectuals and Race by Thomas Sowell. This guy reasons things out pretty thoroughly, and no cow is sacred to him. Both are things I admire in people who tackle difficult topics. I want to read a lot more of what he’s written. Apparently this book is a subsection of a book called Intellectuals and Society, though expanded and revised into its own book. I will probably be reading that next. The biggest take-away I have from this book is to beware of people who support an idea that imposes no cost on them (but extreme cost on others) if they are wrong, and that it isn’t wrong to ask for evidence and hard facts, no matter how sacred-seeming the topic you are addressing. Being “on the side of the angels” is less important than the truth, no matter how right an idea may seem.

Games

Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild. Holy cow, you guys. Do you understand that I don’t do controller-based games? I can’t. I didn’t grow up playing them, and I dismissed all such games as impossible for me to learn at this stage in my life. How could I ever master the muscle memory necessary for games like Bioshock or Last of Us or Skyrim? It was forever out of my reach. Until. I watched a couple Youtube videos by a guy who had his wife play video games for the first time, a series about Gaming for Non-Gamers, and he covered Breath of the Wild. And I realized that this game actually teaches you, better than most other games, how to use its mechanics. And I also realized, for the first time, that video games have their own language, MUCH LIKE BOOKS AND LITERATURE ACTUALLY HAVE A SEPARATE LANGUAGE AND CONVENTIONS THAT HEAVY READERS AND WRITERS CAN RECOGNIZE. Once I realized there’s a purposeful language, I started looking for it, and recognizing it as I tried Breath of the Wild. Guys. It’s been a month, and I just beat the Divine Beast… I forget the name, but it’s the elephant. And I took almost no damage. Now, all that being said… this game is also hard-core tripping my addiction issues. I lose 7 hours without blinking while playing this game, sometimes longer. And also, I stop caring about other things. Like writing. Like cleaning. Like… contacting people. Those are all symptoms that accompanied my addiction to text based roleplaying. I am also using it to numb some current anxieties, which is ANOTHER addiction signal. So, for now, I’m going to haul back and put strict limitations on my playing. If it’s still a problem, I may need to drop it. But even if I do, the fact that I’m doing as well as I am continues to re-inforce an idea that slowly gains ground in me: many things that I dismiss out of hand as “I can’t do it, I don’t have the skills,” are things I can learn. I don’t think that is true for ALL things, however, it is true for more things than I have ever allowed as possible, and that is incredibly encouraging.

Anime

Log Horizon. This was fun, just lots of fun to watch. I’ve never played a MMORPG, but my recent base of learning the D&D system helped me understand most components of the MMORPG I was watching in this show (and my game-loving husband filled in the rest of the blanks). Unfortunately I found the second season to be confusing. It dropped a large number of new characters and motivations on us with little to no explanation, then didn’t spend time developing our understanding (or even exploring our lack of understanding) with them before throwing our heroes into conflict with them. Felt like they expected us to know where they were going, but I didn’t understand what was going on. In spite of that, the dialogue was spot on the whole time, in ways I found amusing because of how closely they parallel life OUTSIDE the game world. All in all, very enjoyable anime, and I look forward to the…. new season dropping later this year? Heck yes!

[hecallsmehischild]

Recent Media Consumed

Movies

Onward. Beautiful, funny, memorable. If the D&D world evolved and adopted technology and looked back on what its history was, that’s the setting and trajectory of the movie. On top of that concept, it’s a really tender journey of two brothers. Well written, directed, animated, scored–pretty much every level of this was a treat. Definitely watch.

A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood. This is one of those movies where I just say, “It was hard and beautiful and good. Go see it.”

Books

You Suck At Cooking by… You Suck At Cooking’s youtube channel creator who remains determinedly unnamed, including in the copyright page which lists the copyright as belonging to, and I quote, “Wangjanglers Unlimited Ltd.” This is the one and only recipe book that I have read from cover to cover. It is a ridiculous romp and full of really delicious looking recipes. It also has a few pages where the author absolutely does not give a flying fig. Most notably displayed on the “calamari,” “diet ice pops,” and “notfogato” recipe pages. Every time the author mentions putting oil in a pan it starts with “heat oil over medium heat until it shimmers like” and is followed by a unique and ridiculous metaphor that is different every time, such as “a freshly waxed Rolls-Royce under a moonlit disco ball.” This recipe book is amazing and the guy’s Youtube channel is just as good. Check both out.

Tales of Earthsea by Ursula Le Guin. This is one of those you-overlooked-a-living-classic-fantasy-writer reads. She has a style somewhere between Tolkien and modern fantasy, where there’s a rich historical type narrative interlaced with compelling zoomed-in closeups of character interactions. Tales of Earthsea is an omnibus that contains all the stories she wrote set in the world of Earthsea, and each one had an afterword that discusses the particular struggles she had with each book. These I found to be as valuable as the stories themselves. Reading how a fellow fantasy writer flails to find their craft always gives me hope. I’ll be looking into more of her books in the future.

Games

Untitled Goose Game. This game is pure delight. It’s a little stressful sometimes, trying to figure out how to get the to-do items to-done items, but overall this is just a delight. And if you want you can just spend time wrecking stuff and swimming around, honking and flapping. Simple, soothing visuals, soothing music. And the punch line? Oh yes, this game has a punch line of sorts, and by the time we got to it, I had forgotten about the setup so I laughed really hard when we got to the end. Absolutely marvelous.

What Remains of Edith Finch. Had this game on the list forever, finally played through it. The way it tells story through visuals and clues left everywhere, the way it builds suspense, the way it immerses you in the tale of each member of the Finch Family is incredible. Pretty short, but an intense and often disturbing story with a strangely triumphant declaration by the end.

Fanfiction

The Earlstone Mansion by Dib07. Invader Zim oneshot. Lovely set up, a haunted mansion with a backstory and setting to make your skin crawl. Author is very good at making you uneasy from start to finish, at the same time it’s something that someone who’s afraid of horror, like me, can still read through without fleeing.

Chomp by @velociraptoraddict. Invader Zim chapter fic. This story is ongoing at the time of this writing. The author has set up an interesting (parasitic? symbiotic?) relationship with a new alien species, exploring the lore of this species and outlining lore concepts from the Irken race as well. I’m looking forward to see where the author will take this story.

[hecallsmehischild]

Recent Media Consumed

Shows

The Twilight Zone. I finally sat down to watch all the way through instead of an episode here or there. So far, I’ve watched two seasons. There’s five total, but one is missing off Netflix, so I’ll only be watching four out of five. This is a show that understands tone setting, sustaining a pace, and creating intrigue. This is a show whose writers spin narrative phrases as rich as silk. This is a show whose characters we only get to know for a little bit, but who are living breathing personas. It is rare to see a cardboard cutout on the personality carousel, and caricature is a dirty word. Each character is acted like they have had, and will continue to have, seasons of development, even if you only see them once. Sometimes I cringe in humiliation for the characters. Sometimes I choke up. Sometime I want to leap up and cheer. Sometimes I nod, “Good riddance. Serves you right.” This show is still brilliant. (most of the way through the second season) Starting to get some “bad” episodes, ones that grate on me so much I can’t watch all the way through, but still pretty creepy/interesting premises, and still worth watching.

Books

1984 by George Orwell. This book was scary to read in high school, and it’s even scarier a little over a decade later. The whole “2 minutes hate” and “hate week” feels like the direction our online culture, especially, has gone (yelling furiously about the thing we’ve been directed by the media to yell furiously about, getting caught up in it because the people all around you are to the point where you can’t really help yourself). The surveillance is basically accepted at this point. Thought police are us, not “them.” 1984 ages really well on a regular basis and that is the most unfortunate thing I could think of.

Once Upon A River by Diane Setterfield. This is one of those stories that is like eating triple layered chocolate cake. It’s just a pleasure to read, from the way the stories interweave and flow, from the narrators understanding of that and comparison to the river, to the usage of words throughout, to the resolution (or deliberate open-endedness) of each branch of the story. Lovely book I happened to pick up in an independent bookstore, a very fortunate find.

Games

Her Story. When you figure out the twist, it’s a real smack in the face. Then once you’ve figured out the twist, the story gets progressively more disturbing. This is a good game, if a little frustrating at times. I’d recommend keeping a Word document on hand to type up important details, it will help you figure out the story better than the crude organizational function of the ancient computer the game gives you to “use”. It’s a lot of fun to play with two people, not that it affords two users, but two people sitting down can discuss the details as they are dripped out. It makes for a fun few hours.

Oneshot. Admittedly I did it very walkthrough style because I wanted to really get it right (getting a bad ending is heartbreaking so I try to avoid it). But I enjoyed the story a lot. It has a lot of Undertale vibes in the manner of meta storytelling and fourth wall breaking. It’s a sweet story, worth a play through.

Eliza. This is a visual novel. I haven’t really done visual novels much, but that might change. Based on the therapy chatbot of the 60′s that’s still available online, this story is about a company selling chatbot therapy with a human proxy speaking all the chatbot’s lines. Your character is one of the original programmers who dropped off the face of the earth for three years, following a tragedy, and returned to see what became of her work. It’s a fascinating character study, for her and everyone else in this tale. I know I probably say that a lot, but there aren’t any cardboard cutouts here. Lots of really different and interesting people with a variety of problems, but no cardboard cutouts. Worth playing. Or, watching? Reading? I’m new to this genre...

Fanfiction

Moving by VonRaptor. Mystery Skulls Animated chapter fic, ongoing. aaaaAAAAaaaAAAaaaAAAAAAAA. This is good. This hits the right notes for me, so much. The pace is slow, but it’s a good kind of slow pace with a whole lot of attention paid to detail in the interactions. The gang slowly works out their interactions as they move in together, post-Hellbent, and boy is there a lot to work out, and their enemies might not be totally behind them either. (edit after reaching the end) NOPE. ENEMIES ARE NOT BEHIND THEM. But it’s coming together beautifully and I can only hope this story continues as the author feels able to update because this fic is a good, steaming cup of mocha for the soul. Starts off with nice warm comfort and then THERE’S THE CAFFEINE SPIKE.

[hecallsmehischild]

@undead0relived replied to your post “Why in the world did I stop playing Sunless Sea? Seriously, this game...”

:o sunless sea? What can you tell us about it?

Tagging @pipefoxesonthemoon​, since he got me into it and can probably add on if I miss anything.

In the world of Sunless Sea, you seem to be in a sort of post-apocalyptic setting somewhere around Britain, but it’s no map you recognize. Most of it is ocean, with various and sundry islands on your map. You have to uncover the map as you travel, first in a terribly rickety ship that is an attractive target to pirates and sea monsters. As you trade cargo and complete quests and gather information and secrets to pass on to your superiors (or others who will offer you more money for them) you begin to weave a story. You also can hire on certain crew members, with the option of gathering items they need to resolve their issues and quests. Long stretches of time are spent traveling over the waters in your ship.

Because of this, Sunless Sea is a game that commits the crime of spending your time, which I have heard decried as a near-evil thing sometimes. I find it to be a very relaxing thing, however, to watch the ship move over the waters. Most of the music is fairly relaxing, unless your madness meter gets too high or your supplies too low. You will probably die several times before getting the hang of this game. I have chosen the death option that allows me to keep the map fully charted each time (as opposed to keeping an officer or a ship) because holy cow, that was hands down the hardest part. Uncovering the whole dang map. It can get pretty dark, depending on which stories you follow and which intrigues you get caught up in. There’s a whole lot of things that would be metaphorical in real life that are real life in this game, a lot of fun little quirky things, and a lot of story. I’ve played 40 hours and barely scratched the surface, finally getting my feet after several deaths. I dropped it for a while, busy with other things, but I think now would be a good time to take it up again.

[hecallsmehischild]

Recent Media Consumed

Shows

Green Eggs and Ham. Guys. Guys. GUY. I cannot sTrEsS iT eNoUgH that THIS is the Dr. Seuss adaptation everyone has been waiting for. THEY GOT HIS SOUL. THEY GOT HIS DESIGNS. THE SHOW MAKES YOU BELIEVE THEY ACTUALLY PAID COMPETENT WRITERS WHO LOVE THE SOURCE. THE ANIMATION IS FLUID AND BEAUTIFUL. IT’S FUNNY. IT’S HEART WRENCHING. AND IT GIVES EVERYTHING REASONS, CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT, AND YES YOU CAN DEVELOP A BOOK LIKE THIS INTO A FULL NETFLIX SERIES WHEN YOU PAY THE WRITERS RIGHT. THE SOUNDTRACK EVEN, THE SOUNDTRACK. In conclusion this was amazing and I cannot WAIT for season 2. YEAH YOU HEARD ME, THERE’S A SESON 2 IN THE WORKS AND IT EVEN MAKES SENSE WHY.

Air TV. Re-watch. I think that not all of it makes sense, but it still yanks my heartstrings hard. I dropped it two points on my rating scale, but it’s still a good series to watch. And very painful. You don’t need to understand everything to get the feelz of this anime. Though some things made MORE sense this time since I knew that this anime was adapted from a visual novel dating sim. Certain plot structures, decisions, and even dialogue make perfect sense, but only in that context.

Chobits. I watched this anime once through in college and thought I was never coming back to this, but decided to go on a cringe fest together with Sergey, who watched it around the same time period but ditched it by the infamous “panties” episode. Funny thing is, both of us agree that it’s a lot better than we remember. Yes, it is fan service central, but if the show could stop squealing over boobs for ten seconds at a time, there’s a legitimately deep and tender love story here. But, you know, they won’t, so brace yourself to roll eyes or squirm every other minute.

John Mulaney (Kid Gorgeous at Radio City, The Comeback Kid, New In Town.) My favorite was New In Town. I like bits of each act, other bits made me sad for inexplicable reasons, but it was interesting to watch three acts by Tumblr’s darling.

Movies

Inception. Seen it once but man. It’s as good as I remember. Love the creativity of this.

Just Mercy. Deserves all the praise it’s getting. Beautiful. Painful. Though the conclusion I walk away with is still not “death penalty is bad” it’s “defense representation is busted and needs fixing.”

Turbo. I remember when I first saw this. It was one of those movies I was really unsure about since it just looked so… dumb. Took me by surprise in all the good ways, and it’s still good.

Books

Gang Leader for a Day by Sudhir Venkatesh (Audible). This is one of those books I have a hard time expressing my thoughts on. It’s hard. Painful to listen to. Fascinating. Shocking. A rogue sociologist spends six years getting to know the inner workings of a Chicago street gang? Definitely not my usual. But stunning. I hope, one day, this book sparks a solution for the problems this book lays open, both the obvious and subtler ones.

Freakonomics by Steven Levitt and Stephen Dubner (Revised and Expanded edition) (Audible). I got a little thrown in chapter 3 when these guys cross referenced several events from Gang Leader for a Day and got some details… different? So I’m not sure about a couple of the details (the name of the gang was different and the fate of one member was different) but this book is fascinating and disturbing, and sheds a whole new light on the way people think and their motivations with questions like, how are the Klu Klux Klan similar to real estate agents? Or, what do sumo wrestlers and teachers have in common? The chapter on names was very dry, to me, but aside from that chapter, economics has never been so interesting. Be prepared to either set your morality aside or be mortally offended, however. The authors do not care about morality or your feelings. They ask questions and seek answers. And while some of the conclusions deeply disturb me, I do admire a dedicated search for truth in spite of what people will think.

Games

Life is Strange 2 (chapter 5). So this is a great story, and I loved the details woven into all the endings. I still walked away melancholy and depressed. It’s a good game, but I feel the weight of the whole of it. Also, could have done without a few more of the cardboard cutouts. But. At least those weren’t the only types of character portrayals.

Inside. This has been on the list to do forever. The mechanics are very simple and you have very limited actions. Nothing is explained to you. You are dropped into a situation you do not understand and you just try to survive and figure out how to move forward. Fortunately there is an extremely forgiving death save system, so you lose pretty much zero progress whenever you die. You are merely taken back to right before the life-endangering situation began. The atmosphere is confusing, frightening, and dark. The story gets darker the further in you go. It’s a short game, but really good. Unfortunately we got the bad ending on the first playthrough, and have to go back and replay, finding all of the machines to break along the way, in order to get the good ending. The bad ending is horrific, let me tell you...

[hecallsmehischild]

Recent Media Consumed

Books

Divorce and Remarriage in the Church by David Instone-Brewer. Before anyone gets their knickers in a twist, no, I’m absolutely not considering this. Friend is going through this and said it should be a general read in the Christian community because it also teaches theology and what questions you ask when reading the Bible, and how not to say things like, “Well, guess you can never get remarried,” to your friend going through divorce because it isn’t true. That prelude being said... I’m still not done yet, but I’m at least 3/4 through and it is blowing my mind almost every chapter and I will be reading this book aloud and posting it to Youtube, as I’ve been doing with other books recently, because it’s THAT important.

A Map of Days by Ransom Riggs. I’m not entirely sure what to think of this book. It definitely made me feel better about the too-many-coincidences-helping-our-heroes-out issues of the previous book. I think I’ll trek with this series a bit longer (she says, having come to the end of the book which cliffhangers off, promising ANOTHER in the works).

Watership Down by Richard Adams. I read this book a few times as a child and then again as highschool required reading (I was mortally offended when classmates referred to it as “the bunny book” as if it was some cute little hoppity hop hop fluff novel). It’s pretty much how I remembered it. Gritty. Puts you in with rabbits and the mindset of the animal (can’t really count higher than four, get to know each other through touch and smell and breathing rate and play, revere stories of tricksters, etc) and is overall a wonderful and absorbing read. I also greatly appreciate the inclusion of a glossary of terms in the back whenever the text doesn’t immediately explain a word. 2/3 through my re-read and it’s a comforting book to go through again, after all these years. My copy doesn’t even have a front cover anymore and the back cover is dogged and all the pages are near-brown and all the swear words are blotted out from my super puritanical phase where I wanted to censor all my books as a teen. It’s a lovely relic of bygone days and a comforting read. Though now I’m irritated at myself for all the blotted out words jarring me out of a good reading flow.

On Deck: Trauma Stewardship by Laura Van Dernoot Lipskey and Connie Burk.

Shows

Watership Down (Netflix). (before re-reading the book) I guess this could be classed as “miniseries” or “very long movie broken into four parts”. Last time I read Watership Down was in high school for assigned reading, though I had already read it as a morbid little kid and loved it. I can’t remember all details, but whoever made this show quite obviously loved the source material. It does similar things as the book, like dumping you into the rabbits’ vocabulary without explaining and allowing you to pick up what things mean as you watch (or hoping you read the book and already understand the words). Nothing rings very false to what I remembered. This is a well done adaptation. It’s a little hard to distinguish most of the rabbits from each other, but stepping back and watching with a general comprehension (instead of getting absolutely stuck on figuring out which rabbit is which) is useful in this case. Overall? Good watch. (revision of opinion post re-reading the book, see above point) So I’m starting to see where the Netflix version took a bit of a left turn. It did a fairly good job, though actually the book didn’t drop us into the terminology as sharply as I thought I remembered. The thing that stands out to me the most is that Netflix brought more females to the front of the story and that does actually bother me to a certain extent, and here’s why: where is the sense in dropping human morality onto an animal STORY? An animal FABLE is a whole different kettle of fish. An animal FABLE is like Animal Farm, where animal characters are intended to stand in for human counterparts to deliver hard truths. An animal STORY is like Watership Down or The Promise of the Wolves or Venus Among the Fishes and all stories that take place WITHIN the animal world as if we, the reader, are experiencing things from the animal point of view entirely. In the book, Watership Down, the female rabbits (does) are looked on mostly as acquisitions to be made and are not very plot relevant beyond that, but this is understandable because, simply, they are animals. This isn’t about human morality, this is about prey mammals figuring out survival, both day to day survival and survival of their warren. To this end, the males (bucks) do most of the planning and fighting and trickstering wherein lies the action of Watership Down. By bringing the does to the forefront, it feels like Netflix was trying to shoehorn in some human morality because saying otherwise would be distasteful to people watching. But. It’s. About. Animals. So this is a bit of a sticking point for me that does bother me. However, overall, I saw nothing that truly gutted the heart of the book and still consider it worth a watch.

Steven Universe: The Recent Upheavals. I don’t know. I love the new fusion designs. I absolutely adored That Scene (got chills when he shouted). But I’m not sure how I feel about a lot of the rest. Very conflicted.

Ditched after one episode list: Dragon Pilot (Netflix), Last Hope (Netflix).

Movies

Albion: The Enchanted Stallion. Okay, I guess? Writing was kind of mediocre, but another one where they were obviously trying with beautiful sets and costumes.

Shrek. It’s been a long time but it was a good rewatch. The gross stuff always gets to me a bit, but the thing is they built it to be totally in character and part of this creature’s fairytale existence which earns it more points. Shrek has always been one of the most loving fairytale deconstruction mockery movies and now I want to rewatch the second one because I remember it being superior in every way to an already wonderful first movie.

The Prince of Egypt. It’s been a long time. I was struck again how beautiful certain songs on that soundtrack are (any of the large chorus songs and the Heaven’s Eyes song especially) and the utter despair of coming to repeated dead ends, but how in spite of that, no. God was always there. I have a million questions about why the dead ends and heart-hardening was necessary in the first place BUT. God was still always there. And the Jews exist to this day. This movie isn’t, of course, completely accurate but it is beautiful and it reminded me of things I needed reminding about.

Games

Life is Strange 2, chapter 1. Conflicted on a couple of points. Character Caricatures don’t sit well with me in general. But it’s beautiful and gripping and I’m looking forward to continuing with chapter 2 soon.