#no more art for a week at least . ive done too much okay bye

[cubedmango]

white lie

(rest of the comic under the cut)

[heanv]

End To Start | haechan

genre: romance,angst

warnings:cursing,mentions of drugs

word count:1,6k

requested by: @ki-aechan

song: End To Start by Nct 127

Who knows  that a single person can change you and your future to the point you really actually change and find yourself again?

/ I know there is no point if it stops even in the dark/

There is this boy Haechan you  always had a crush on.You never  told  him of course and the reason  is obvious – he was lee heachan, the boy every single girl wants and dreams about and you were nothing more than another girl in an ocean of highschoolers.

But Haechan had his dark side and little did you know.He was addicted .He smoked every single day and it was getting worse as the time passed, he couldn’t think about anything else, there was just too much going on. The scandals  in his family, the pressure of being famous at school ,the grades and the fact that haechan had nobody. Sure he had his “friends” at school but most of them just wanted to hang out with him just because he was famous. His real friends live in another town far away from him and he always thought about leaving the hellhole he lived in and go and be free and happy with the people he really loves.

But for now he couldnt do it. He cannot let his friends to see him like this. Smooking joint every single night and wasting his money on weed, he just couldn’t. And the worst is that he had nobody to talk to.not a single soul.

/gotta end it tonight/

One night you are invited to a party of a classmate and haechan is  there. of course he is there. The whole night you observed him and you see the emptiness in his eyes and how  he pretended to have fun . suddenly he looks at you and you freeze . the whole eye contact  sends you hot waves and you feel his gaze burning you inside out. he looks away and not long after he leaves,looking at you one last time before he shuts the door.

You dont know why but you felt this as a sign to follow him. You tell your friends that you have to go and when you are outside the house you take a deep breath and you start looking around for haechan.

‘stalker much,huh?” you turn and see him smoking next to his car.

“you smoke?” then you smell something disgusting and realize this is not a regular cigarette “oh my god” you take the thing out of his hand and throw it on the ground,stepping over it.

“WHAT THE FUCK THIS IS EXPENSIVE “ he shouted

“ YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE IS EXPENSIVE- YOUR HEALTH” you pause for a second “ you cant just smoke weed on the street”

‘’I don’t see something stopping me besides that who are you to tell me what to do” you stay silent ‘’see it yourself, I don’t even know you”

“ you cant just smoke it heachan , this is destroying you and your body” you whisper

“ have I asked you to take care of me,hmm I don’t remember , so don’t  mess with me” he says as he lits up another cigarette and enters his car, driving away from you.

In the next few weeks you barely see heachan  at school. He looks so different , so dark and silent ,no one has ever seen him like this,he was cold to everyone and he was empty as if the whole world has gone bad and dark and you just couldn’t handle looking at him being a mess, you had to do something.So you did.

One day after school you go to your secret place on the last floor in the school,there is an old art classroom where nobody goes and this is the place when you often go when you want to be alone.When you are about to enter the room you hear that somebody is talking on the phone inside.

“-yeah im okay, im doing really fine,no I stopped playing soccer , I don’t know man, I just don’t feel it anymore,no I don’t workout too”he pauses for a moment” what I ate last,umm you know man I don’t remember but im fine like really fine but I miss you guys I miss you a lot,all of you I promise soon I will visit you,okay bye man,love you” you know who this is,there is no way you couldn’t recognize this voice.but he lied,he isn’t fine , he is a mess and somebody has to help him.

“so you still stalking me or what?’ you see heachan on the door he just opened.

“ I am not stalking you,this is my secret place I come every time I am s-“

“ no way this is my secret place,the only place in the fucking school where I can be alone”” he says and you feel the sadness in his voice.

Eventually he lets you inside and you both sit in silence as he lits up a cigarette.

“since when you started smoking?”

“since when you care?”

ouch,you didn’t expect  that.

“ I asked first “ you said,hopping he will finally answer.

“ I asked second” he looks at you smirking and you sigh in disappointment.’’  A year and a half”

You look at him “huh?”

“its been a year and a half since I started smoking,that’s what I said” he sends you a dark look but that’s what you wanted to hear.

“good you answered” now its your time to smirk “ Now,why do you smoke?”

“you think im gonna answer?”

“ yes you are”

“someone’s confident,huh?”

Lie,big fat lie, if you gotta be honest right now you are shaking,talking to him like this but you had to.’

“look I am depressed, 9 years ago when me and my parents moved in here, I left all my friends in my old town and its been 9 years since I last saw them,I miss them like crazy and right now im stuck in this town,this hellhole I have nobody here and my parents wont stop shouting at each other and im just done with everyone and everything,I just don’t fucking care anymore” he pauses to smoke “ you happy now, go and tell everyone so they can laugh at me,what are you waiting for?”

You just stand there,frozen so this is all he hides behind his smile and cool personality. this is what makes him smoke in the late hours in the night.this is what makes him go crazy. this is it.

“Im sor-“

“don’t , do not say it” he looked at you with his sad,red eyes. Now they arent’t empty, they are full of hidden emotions .

Since this day you and heachan became friends. He still smoked but at least he felt a bit better but you found yourself  falling more and more for him and the more time you spent with him the more you had to hide your emotions.

One night around 11pm you are ready to fall asleep when you hear a knock at your window , you stand up and see haechan sitting on the tree next to your window.

/ a voice that will reach you wherever you are/

“what the hell are you doing here?” you say,opening your window to let him inside.

“ my parents are shouting the fuck out at each other again and I didn’t want to listen again and the only place I could go is here”

“im happy you came” you say as you both sit on your bed

“me too” he says almost like a whisper but loud enough for you to hear it . he looks up to you with his beautiful eyes.” You know since we started talking  Ive been smoking less,I just don’t feel the need to smoke when I can talk to you about,hm, about everything to be honest”

You coudnt believe your eyes, he really just told you this.

‘’im so happy to hear this haechan,im really so happy for you”

“none of this would have happened if you didn’t stalked me so its your fault , I guess” he says placing his usual smirk on his face

“ I didn’t stalk you,oh my god haechan!” you say both of you laughing.

/dance on the surface to draw and draw and dance all night/

He looks at you with his smile fading and his face becoming serious.” y/n I think I like you” he says all of a sudden. You look at him with wide eyes not believing what you just heard “I know, I know it sounds crazy but anybody has never showed that they care so much about me and the fact that ive been clean for a week shows me that I don’t need weed to get high and forget all my problems for hour or two, the only thing I really need is you and I know it still sounds crazy but I realy really like you you,y/n, I really do.”

/ a scene that openes in front of you when night ends,yes I see/

You were on the verge of crying.” I like you too heachan, Ive always liked you” he looks with eyes full of hope no longer empty and kisses you. A kiss that was way long awaited from both of you and finally happened. When you parted your lips he whispered. “I will quit smoking, I promise” then he pauses “I will do anything to have you,y/n and im not joking’” then he kisses you again.

/ gotta end it tonight to start again,ready for a new flight/

masterlist

[bfknj]

tags masterpost (?)

I was tagged in a few tag games over the past few days and instead of posting them all separately I decided to just put them all on one! If I tagged you feel free to do any or all of these (including people who tagged me!!) As always, don’t feel any pressure to do any, I just think these are fun and wanted to share :)

- - - - 11 questions tag - - - -

Rules: 1. Make sure to post the rules!! 2. Answer the questions given to you by the tagger. 3. Write 11 questions of your own. 4. Tag 11 people

these questions are from @moonmyun !! michaela you had me stRUGGLIN OKAY YOUR QUESTIONS WERE HARD but ily still bless you for the tag you angel :”)

1 who is your bias group? why?

BANGTAN SONYEONDAN AKA MEME SQUAD !!!!!!! honestly they just make me so beyond happy wow holly nobody ever says that about their favs ur original a LOOOT of music is centered around love these days and not to say bts doesn’t do that with a lot of their music but they also tackle a lot of societal issues and I really respect them for that. From 21st century girls w politics, spring day mv and the ferry sinking, suicide in the I need u mv and many other things I feel like they take risks for the sake of portraying what they hold true to their hearts/morals not necessarily what will sell best and I can’t name many other groups who do that as well :( also my boys cute af I love those dweebs IM SO WHIPPED HAH

2 which kpop video do you find the most aesthetically pleasing?

this is hard :(( idk my number one but I really like seventeen hip hop unit’s check in, red velvet’s one of these nights, ladies code’s galaxy, kim lip of loona’s eclipse and crush’s fall ! they don't all match my aesthetic but I feel like they match the songs really well!!! watch them okay 3/5 of them are hELLA UNDERRATED bye

3 if you could instantly learn one choreography, what would you pick?

something by either gfriend or bts?? love whisper or not today or blood sweat tears?? OOOH or red flavor by rv!! tbh though I’m really skinny so my limbs look weird af with a lot of dances rip

4 who do you look up to as a role model (in the kpop community or not)?

there’s no person in particular that really sticks out but I will say I’ve always admired jungkook, and really all trainees for that matter, who leave their families to start training really young because its a process thats hard physically, emotionally and mentally for late teen/early twenties trainees but there’s sO many kids who enter in their pre-teens and idk how they survive also I realized this doesn’t answer your question at all I'm sorry its 1:28 AM I’m just waiting for the DNA mv to drop

5 whose concert would you go to if you could and why?

DAY6 DAY6 DAY6 DAY6 !!!!! THEY INVENTED LIVE SHOWS DONT FIGHT ME ON THIS or shoot maybe dean or crush or heize?? I LOVE TOO MANY TALENTED PEOPLE also I would say bts but although there are countless amazing beautiful armys there are def some crazy scary ones that are known to be horrible at concerts so

6 if you could pick one idol to be best friends with, who would it be and why?

OK YALL IVE THOUGHT ABOUT THIS A LOT IN MY DAILY LIFE SO S/H TO MICHAELA FOR ASKING ILY either boo seungkwan or ahn heeyeon!! I feel like hani would be so fun to have girl time with bc I feel like we’re really similar in some ways ?? IDK I LOVE HER bUT overall I’d say boo seungkwan because istg we are 100000000% the same person only he has a weenie ok just trust me I am boo and boo is me

7 would you want to be a part of a kpop group if you had the opportunity to be?

I’d absolutely love to be in the entertainment industry and I think the staging, costuming, group dynamics and publicity (variety shows, fan service/interations) in the kpop industry are all really cool but I honestly don't think I have the mental strength to do it lmao idols go through so much and I don’t think I could handle it regardless of how much I enjoy singing/dancing/performing etc.

8 what languages do you speak, and which do you want to learn?

english and some spanish??? I understand a lot because quite a bit of my family speaks it but my conversational skills have gone downhill recently because I haven’t had a lot of opportunities to practice :( with that said, I’d like to be fluent in spanish and - BEFORE YOU COME FOR ME READ IT ALL OK - I’d like to learn korean BECAUSE!!!!! when I was little before I moved I would go to a farmers market by my house and a lot of the older ladies there spoke korean and little holly though it sounded so pretty and I always wanted to chat w them ok THATS WHY I’m not a creepy koreaboo this has been a thing since before I even knew what a kpop was ok bye 

9 what song cheers you up when you’re sad?

fire by bts bc I get hella turnt to that song its a pROBLEM also jackpot by block b, baby/puss in boots by astro, chained up by vixx, not today/bst by bts, knock knock by twice, i think I love you by sonamoo THE LIST GOES ON I HAVE A WHOLE PLAYLIST OK

10 what things do you associate with your bias?

dimples!! pretty hands, closing one eye in selcas, ootds, happiness so cheesy ik sORRY, ryan, studying, awkward dancing, open mouth laughs, second hand embarrassment, sentimental rants

11 what’s your favourite thing to do in your free time?

cry over namjoon tbh I’m one of those people who is constantly listening to music so I’m always doing that and singing along regardless of if its free time or not HAH then I really like reading and catching up on my youtube subscriptions

my questions!

what is your dream job?

favorite book of all time?

what is your current fashion like and what is your dream fashion?

if your best friend was cloned, how would you know which one of the two was your best friend?

what song got you into kpop?

which idol do you think is most similar to you?

favorite kpop lyrics?

if given the opportunity to collaborate with any group/soloist of your choice, who would you choose and why?

what is your favorite physical and character trait of your ult?

which underrated groups/soloists do you believe deserve more recognition? any song recs?

do you read fanfics? if so, what are your favorites?

- - - - song title game - - - -

I was tagged by @kihani, your song choices were 12/10 

rules: spell you your url with kpop songs and tag ten people! (all of these happen to by song recs too so listen nd be happy friends)

mysterious - hello venus

i think i love you? - sonamoo (a fav ok listen pls)

life in color - beenzino

knock - knk 

jelly - hotshot

only u - daze

out of sorts - vixx

night rather than day - exid

she’s a baby - zico

- - - - get to know me tag! - - - -

1ST RULE: Tag 10 people you want to get to know better.

2ND RULE: BOLD the statements that are true. tagged by @sleepysugarmoon, thank you friend!! APPEARANCE: I am 5'7" or taller I wear glasses (or contact lenses) I have at least one tattoo I have at least one piercing I have blonde hair I have brown eyes I have short hair My abs are at least somewhat defined I have or have had braces PERSONALITY: I love meeting new people  People tell me that I’m funny   Helping others with their problems is a big priority for me I enjoy physical challenges I enjoy mental challenges I’m playfully rude with people I know well I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it ABILITY: I can sing well I can play an instrument  I can do over 30 pushups without stopping I’m a fast runner I can draw well I have a good memory I’m good at doing math in my head I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute I have beaten at least 2 people in arm wrestling I know how to cook at least 3 meals from scratch I know how to throw a proper punch HOBBIES: I enjoy playing sports I’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else I’m in an orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else I have learned a new song in the past week I work out at least once a week I’ve gone for runs at least once a week in the warmer months I have drawn something in the past month Fandoms are my #1 passion  I do or have done martial arts EXPERIENCES: I have had my first kiss I have had alcohol I have scored the winning goal in a sports game I have watched an entire season of a TV show in one sitting I have been at an overnight event I have been in a taxi I have been in the hospital or ER in the past year I have beaten a video game in one day I have visited another country I have been to one of my favorite band’s concerts RELATIONSHIPS: I’m in a relationship I have a crush on a celebrity I have a crush on someone I know I have been in at least 3 relationships I have never been in a relationship I have asked someone out or admitted my feelings to them I get crushes easily I have had a crush on someone for over a year I have been in a relationship for at least a year I have had feelings for a friend MY LIFE: I have at least one person I consider a “best friend” I live close to my school My parents are still together I have at least one sibling I live in the United States There is snow right now where I live I have hung out with a friend in the past month I have a smartphone I have at least 15 CDs I share my room with someone RANDOM SHIT: I have breakdanced I have had a teacher with the last name that’s hard to pronounce I have dyed my hair I’m listening to one song on repeat right now I have punched someone in the past week I know someone who has gone to jail I have broken a bone I have eaten a waffle today I know what I want to do with my life I speak at least 2 languages I have made a new friend in the past year

tagging some mutuals bc ily and why do you even follow me I'm a wreck tbh OK i tag: @kihani, @21jd, @lapatronakim, @94seulqi, @gayoongi, @springdqy, @medina-kim, @15minss, @je0n, @cottontae, @taebaeul, @booty-baekery, @lalisl, @babekhyun, @voidpjm and anyone else who wants to try any or all of these!! 

[intelligencehavingfun]

In response to the aolw fanfic please do it please

Well, since you twisted my arm...

Not canon. Just for fun. Not a collaboration; I stole Alex and wrote him, and I never feel like I do that well, so I just want to stress that this is not official in any way. But here you go, if you’d like to read some Art of Letter Writing ephemera.  

Five Times Zoe and Alex Met Before They Met and One Time They Didn’t

i

The summer Zoe is ten, her mom’s writing spot is a coffee shop called The Book and Bean. Zoe tags along with her most days, if she doesn’t have swimming lessons or camp or some other activity to go to.

She and her mom have a routine. They get to the coffee shop around ten every morning. Zoe’s mom spreads out her research and notes and laptop on the top of the table while Zoe nests with her own books and notebooks underneath. She writes her own stories until noon or she gets hungry, whichever comes first. Then she reminds her mom about lunch, and they go buy sandwiches and drinks at the counter (tea for her mom, and hot chocolate with some kind of flavored syrup in it for Zoe). When she’s done eating, Zoe reads a book or plays herself in checkers or puts together one of the puzzles from the back wall until her mom is ready to go.

One day, about halfway through the summer, Zoe knows it’s time to go when she sees her mom packing up her laptop and notebooks, but Zoe is almost at the end of her chapter, and she just wants to finish. She reads as fast as she can as her mom comes closer and closer to being ready to go, and finally, when her mom says, “C’mon, Zoe, we gotta go,” Zoe shuts the book and shoves it into the top of her very full bag and hurries after her mom.

A few seconds later, almost to the door, a voice calls out behind her, “Hey! Um, excuse me?” Turning, she sees a boy about her age, with warm brown skin and dark hair and eyes, holding her book out to her. “You dropped this,” he says.

“Oh! Thanks,” she says with a smile. He shrugs, and she takes the book, then turns and follows her mom out of the shop.

ii.

The truth is, Alex couldn’t really care less about football. But Emma had argued that they couldn’t miss the last game of the season. And the chili cheese fries are worth coming out for. But they’re playing Torrey Pines tonight, and the Torrey Pines football team sucks, so the game hasn’t been the most exciting. It’s the end of the third quarter, almost, and Canyon is a good four touchdowns ahead, so he and Emma decide to head to the concession stand.

It’s crowded, mostly with band members from both schools, who are only allowed to wander during third quarter or something, so it’s slow going up to the counter. He’s just gotten his food when a huge cheer erupts from the Torrey Pines side of the stadium. He turns to see what’s happened -- and runs straight into a girl from the TP Marching Falcons, spilling cheese sauce all over her scarlet and gold sleeve.

“Madre de Dios,” he mutters, bracing himself to be yelled at even as he grabs some napkins. He knows how Emma would react if some clumsy oaf spilled cheese all over one of her outfits. “I’m so sorry.”

But to his surprise, the girl shakes her head. “Totally my fault, I was right in the way.” She accepts his napkins and wipes up the worse of the cheese, but it’s still going to stain.

“You’re not gonna get in trouble, are you?” he asks, and she laughs.

“Have you seen these things?” she asks, gesturing to herself. Now that she mentions it, there are a lot of mud and grass stains on the uniform. “It’s the last game of the season, they’re getting dry cleaned next week. Seriously, don’t even worry about it.”

“Alex!” Emma shouts from behind him. “Are you coming?”

“Yeah, in a sec,” he shouts back over his shoulder, then turns back to the TP girl to say ‘Okay’ or ‘Bye’ or something equally awkward but less awkward than just walking away.

“TWO MINUTES!”

The shout comes from a burly guy also in scarlet and gold. Eyes going wide, the girl whips her head around to see the scoreboard, then mutters, “Shit,” and takes off for the Away side of the stadium at a sprint without so much as a backward glance.

He shakes his head and goes to meet Emma. Band kids are weird.

iii.

“All right now, Zoe,” the sandwich shop manager Tim says in a voice of gentle condescension that makes Zoe contemplate punching him in the face. “Do you think you’re up to taking an order all on your own?”

She does not say what she’s thinking, and she really ought to be commended for that. Instead she gives Tim her best, most winning smile. “Absolutely!” she says.

“Okay, then. Next customer is all yours. I’m not going to step in at all,” Tim warns. I’ll believe that when I see it, Zoe thinks, but keeps the smile on her face.

Soon enough, the bell rings, and a guy about her age walks in. “Welcome to Which Wich!” Zoe calls in an upbeat voice. “Have you dined with us before?”

“Um, yeah,” the guy says, already pulling a bag and a Sharpie from the holder on the wall. Zoe takes his bag when he’s finished filling it out and makes his Italian grinder quickly and efficiently, even with Tim breathing down her neck.

“Don’t forget to double check all condiment and topping choices!” Tim warns before she’s even finished with the meat.

“Thanks for the reminder, Tim,” she says through her smile. She is careful not to grimace or make any sort of face at all while adding banana peppers to an otherwise fine sandwich.

“Now, you have to make sure you call out the name loudly and clearly enough to be heard,” Tim tells her as she wraps the finished sandwich and puts it in his bag, her smile never wavering despite the fact that she has heard him say this at least twelve times in her two days of training. “Remember, it may be quiet now, but during our rush hour, there is noise and commotion, and a quiet meek little name call simply won’t---”

“ALEX!” she yells out with all the power of her trombone playing lungs. Can she help it if Tim the Manager was hovering too close and got an earful? “How was that?” she asks with a smile, turning to him. “Was that loud enough?”

“Just -- tend to your customer,” Tim says as Alex comes up to the counter. Zoe passes over the bag with a cheery grin and rings him up. She’s about to wish him a wonderful day when Tim interrupts over her shoulder with a, “And remember, if your food isn’t exactly how you want, we will make you a new sandwich or refund your money! Sometimes it can take these new girls a while to get the hang of things.”

Zoe will not strangle her boss with her apron strings, she will not, she repeats over and over like a mantra. She allows herself one second to breathe deeply and pray for patience. Luckily, the universe helps her avoid homicide, as a new customer approaches with a bag. Tim hurries over to serve them while Zoe finishes Alex’s transaction.

He tips her almost 50% of his bill, and maybe she’s reading into things, but he seems to be offering a silent means of support for having to deal with a misogynistic asshole of a boss. Zoe’s going to choose to believe that, anyway. Anything to help her get through the day.

iv.

He knows something odd is going on in Cuppa Joe’s that morning before he sets foot inside. All the baristas are gathered around the counter, and Andi is waving her arms in the air, and . . . are they all singing?

He considers turning around and going back to his car, but he needs his coffee, so he pushes the door open and slips in.

“ . . . birthday to you!” The baristas and half the shop finish their raucous rendition of the birthday song and burst into spontaneous applause, all directed at a girl Alex doesn’t know, who is smiling and laughing and enjoying the situation much more than he would be if an entire coffee shop decided to sing to him on his birthday.

“Thank you, thank you,” the blonde girl says, nodding to them all, still laughing.

Andi catches sight of him. “Mr. Carter!” she calls out, putting him on the spot. “Wish this lovely young lady a happy birthday!”

“Oh, um . . . happy birthday,” he says, and he thinks maybe he doesn’t sound like a complete idiot. The girl beams at him, like nothing gives her greater joy than having a stranger awkwardly wish her a happy birthday.

“Thanks,” she says, and then Eddie says something to her, allowing Alex to place his order at the counter, but when he goes to pay, someone else places a five dollar bill on the counter. “It’s on me,” says the birthday girl.

“You really don’t have to do that,” Alex says.

“Well, Andi refused to let me pay for my own drink,” the girl says with an affectionate eye roll. “And I’m like a hobbit. I like to give gifts to other people for my birthday. You are the recipient of a random act of kindness. No escaping it. Pay it forward if you like. I couldn’t think of a better birthday gift.”

And before he can think of anything to say, she flashes one more grin, gives the whole store a merry farewell, and bounds away out the door.

v.

“If I was an SAT Math workbook,” Zoe mutters to herself, slowly turning in place and scanning the study tables in the library, “where would I be?” She and Librarian Joy have been searching for the thing for almost ten minutes. The library catalogue says it’s in, Joy’s special librarian catalogue says it’s in, but it’s not on the shelf or on a reshelving cart or anywhere that they can find.

Then she seems him -- a boy about her age, typing away on a laptop, earbuds in his ears and a stack of books beside him. She takes a couple careful steps in his direction, the better to identify the books, and aha! There it is! Victory!

“Excuse me,” she says, approaching his table, but with his headphones in, he doesn’t hear her. So she reaches out and very gently taps him on the shoulder.

He startles, and she immediately springs back, cringing inwardly. “Sorry!” she says in a rush as he pulls out the earbuds. “I didn’t mean to startle you, or interrupt. I was just wondering if you were checking out the math prep book, or if I’d be able to use it.”

He blinks, then processes the question. “Oh! No, I’m done with it. Go ahead,” he says, extricating it from the middle of the pile.

“Thanks,” she says with a smile, taking it. “I think the math portion might actually kill me.”

He offers a tight smile. “Same,” he says, only a little awkwardly.

“When do you test?”

“Three weeks.”

“Me too.” And then, because every bit of his body language is screaming that he would like to be done with this unexpected social interaction, she says, “Well, good luck.”

“You too,” he says, and puts his earbuds back in as Zoe turns, searching out an empty table.

Librarian Joy comes over. “Oh, you found it!” she exclaims.

“Yep! When all else fails, look for another slightly frantic high schooler!”

Joy laughs. “Oh, Zoe, I meant to ask you. How did that project end up going for you? With the letters?”

“Really well!” Zoe says, her eyes lighting up. “Thanks for letting me stash one here -- I got a lot of responses, and I’m still writing to a few people. It’s been a lot of fun.”

“I’m thrilled we could be a part of it,” Joy says, then lets Zoe get to it. Zoe’s glad. If she can crack 600 on the math practice test, she’s allowing herself to respond to Alex’s latest letter.

Three tables away, Alex types on, completely unaware of who it is sharing his space.

vi.

All it takes is one overheard sentence. Alex is sitting in Cuppa Joe’s, reading a book and procrastinating going home when he hears it.

“ZO-oe, you are so slow!”

His attention is immediately brought to the door, where a girl a few years older than himself stands, her posture oozing impatience as she calls to someone out in the parking lot.

Alex is listening hard now for anything, any other clue that might confirm the suspicion making his heart race. Out of the window, he catches a glimpse of long, white-blonde hair whipping in the California wind just as a second unfamiliar girl in the doorway says something that ends in, “ . . . burned hand, cut her some slack.”

Alex is up and moving before the first girl’s response of “A burned hand does not affect her feet, and we are on a schedule,” has time to register.

In hindsight, locking himself in the bathroom may not have been the smartest move. Rachel keeps talking about remodeling and putting multiple stalls in the bathroom, but for now they’re single use, which is currently a blessing and a curse. A blessing because he can press his ear to the door and eavesdrop and know when certain people have left certain coffee shops. A curse because it’s going to be much harder for him to stay in here indefinitely without drawing attention to himself. At some point, someone else will need to use the bathroom. He can only pray Zoe has left by then.

Though it becomes clear after a few minutes that his retreat into the bathroom has not gone entirely unnoticed. The baristas are dragging out this interaction, and the only saving grace is that Zoe and her cousins seem to have someplace else to be, so he won’t be trapped in the bathroom for upwards of twenty minutes.

Finally, finally, finally they are gone, despite everyone’s best efforts. But Eddie is waiting for Alex when he gets back to his table.

“Dude!” he exclaims. “You have the worst timing! She was right here!”

“I know,” he says, gathering his things because loud as it will be at home, it’s gonna beat being here, with the entire staff staring at him and whispering among themselves about things he’s not sure he wants to know. “That’s why I disappeared.”

“That makes literally no sense,” Eddie says, and Alex refrains from rolling his eyes. “Don’t you want to meet her?”

Alex carefully schools his face into an impassive mask. Eddie talks enough as it is. Alex is not going to give him any more ammunition. “It’s an honor thing. We want it to happen on our terms.”

“That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. I say, the sooner the better. Why wait?”

“I have to get home,” is all Alex says.

He’s not usually one to indulge in “What ifs,” but as he drives home, he can’t help but think what might have happened if Zoe’s cousin hadn’t called out her name before she walked through the door.

i.

(and one time they had a conversation about it)

They’re lying on a blanket under their tree in the park in comfortable, easy silence, their hands interlaced between them when Zoe gives voice to something she’s been thinking about lately.

“Do you ever wonder how many times we met before we met?” she asks. When she turns her head to the side, Alex is looking at her.

“What do you mean?” he asks.

“I mean that you and I have both lived in San Diego our wholes lives, and that the city isn’t really that big, especially when you think about the areas we each really inhabit. There’s a lot of overlap in that Venn diagram. My mom has been writing at your stepmom’s coffee shops as long as I can remember. Our schools play each other at football. I work at a restaurant I know you visit because it’s cater-made for people like you who don’t like to interact with anyone.”

He elbows her side at that remark, and she elbows him back, grinning. “At some point,” she continues, “the Law of Averages has to come into play. I mean, we know we were in Cuppa Joe’s at the same time at least once. Honestly, I’d be more shocked to learn that April 18 was actually the first time we ever interacted. So, do you ever wonder how often we did?”

“Well, now I’m going to.”

She grins and turns her gaze back up toward the leaves. “Then my work here is complete.”

They lay in silence for a little longer, then he says, softly, “It’s weird to think about. That I could have met you, talked to you, and not remember.”

“We wouldn’t, though. Necessarily,” she replies, because she’s thought about this a lot. “Because it takes a lot for an interaction to move into long-term memory, right? I call my wait staff by name, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to remember their name three days later, or recognize them if I pass them on the street. Until someone becomes important or semi-permanent . . .” She trails off and shrugs.

“That’s . . . kind of depressing.”

She sits straight up and stares at him, shaking her head. “No, it’s not!” she exclaims. “It’s the most encouraging thing in the world.” He raises himself onto his elbows and looks at her quizzically. So she explains. “When I hypothetically made your sandwich at Which Wich, and did not make faces at the amount of banana peppers I’m sure you made me put on there--” He smirks at that, which was her goal “--or when we, I don’t know, bumped into each other at a football game or a coffee shop, or any other of a million possible interactions, we weren’t ready to really meet yet because really meeting then wouldn’t have led us to this moment and this reality right here, and the universe knew it! It’s like you going into the bathroom when I came into Cuppa Joe’s over Christmas. You knew the timing wasn’t right, but until we could sense those things for ourselves, the universe had to do it for us, and it did! It made sure that we met when we were ready to meet.”

“Or it kept throwing us in each other’s paths and we were too oblivious to notice,” he counters.

“See, that makes it depressing,” she says. “My explanation makes it encouraging.”

He sits all the way up and gives her that look that melts her into a puddle, that smile that’s barely there, his eyes shining with amusement at her but also wonder and joy and so many other things. “Well, then . . .” he says softly, “I suppose I should be thanking the universe.”

“I do every day,” she tells him, and the look in his eyes intensifies and she knows she’s about to be kissed (or she’s about to do the kissing, one or the other), and as the distance between them is closed, she thanks the universe one more time.