#oh you're here because youve had heart palpitations and fainting spells since you were a child and you finally want them checked out?

[healingheartdogs]

Doctors visits as an AFAB person that have absolutely nothing to do with potential pregnancy and do not at all match symptoms of pregnancy be like:

Doc: "When was your last period?"

Me: "I'm currently on my period, it started (date)."

Doc: "And are you on any birth control?"

Me: "Yeah I have the nexplanon arm implant."

Doc: "And are you currently sexually active?"

Me: "Nope, haven't been for years."

~ Fifteen minutes later ~

Doc: "Well your pregnancy test (that we didn't tell you we were doing or ask your consent for) came back negative so it's not that."

No. Fucking. Duh.