#or like. idk like i just. wasn't. dp/dr doesnt even make you feel like a different person you just dont feel like you anymore
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why is my brain . like this
#having one of thr weirder types of dp/dr rn#its mild. it was worse a few minutes ago#it felt so ??? euphoric??? i was so disconnected from my own existence that everything felt great. meaningless. no consequences i guess????#or like. idk like i just. wasn't. dp/dr doesnt even make you feel like a different person you just dont feel like you anymore#its like you're somewhere else entirely. beyond existence at all. at least during milder episodes#during worse ones we've felt like we're a video game character being controlled by some external force that isn't us#like we aren't in posession of our body at all#its fucking scary#but the dissociation from regular life. this near-constant state of being where im just not *quite* me. goddddd#its just. what#god im so. ghhhgg#vent in tags#tw derealization#tw depersonalization#and i so often think 'oh what if i'm exaggerating it all and im really just a hypochondriac mislabeling themselves'#but it would be so much easier if this didnt happen. like my life would be way fucking better without this shit#i dont want it. why do i have to do this
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