#people say that the earlier chapters showed the squad's dynamic better and I think that's what makes me sad abt it

[m00nj3w3l]

Me all caught up with both the ONS anime+manga and getting back into the lowkey dead fandom:

My fucking ass tonight out of the blue: I miss Yoichi

[nickireadstfc]

The King's Men, Chapter 1 – Hello Foxhole, My Old Friend

In which the Foxes are introduced to Meat Grinder Neil, Nicky misses an opportunity for a memeworthy Christmas gift, we find out some things about Jean, and Andrew and Neil chill on a rooftop or whatever.

Sounds good? Then it’s time for Nicki to read The King's Men.

Hello hello hello, we’re back! Welcome to the one, the only, the glorious, all-surpassing, awe-inspiring, shade-throwing, capslock-inducing and feels-wrecking finale to this hell of a ride called All For The Game - welcome to The King's Men.

Let’s start at the very front: A cover, as always, says more than a thousand words, and this cover has one clear message it shouts in the faces of those familiar with the series, clear as day and ringing like a bell: IT'S SHOWDOWN TIME, FUCKERS.

Two Exy racquets, one orange, one black, crossed, clashing. The title, half-orange, half-black. Nora Sakavic' name at the bottom, also half-orange, half-black, menacingly laughing in my face like Rumpelstiltskin on crack, glee-drunk on my surely following future tears.

Whee-hee. Let’s fucking go.

(Also, the chapters are getting much longer by this book, so y'all will have to deal with these posts being longer as well. Soz.)

          Even after a semester at Palmetto State University and a couple weeks practicing on the largest Exy stadium in the United States, Neil was still struck breathless by the Foxhole Court.

Neil, my boy, you never disappoint. Even through hardship, bruises and cuts, one thing can always be relied on: Your gigantic boner for Exy. Get a room, you two.

          “It’s time to go,” Wymack said.

          That was enough to make Neil get up, although his battered body protested.

Oh yeah, quick reminder for anyone who might have forgotten (although – why the fuck would you ever): Neil is currently walking minced meat with Trauma Jetlag™, a literal prison tattoo, and #allnatural #naturaleyes #naturalhair #nomakeup #nofilter.

Because of that, he’s obviously not that keen on running into his squad at the moment. Can’t exactly blame the dude.

If I looked like Freddy Krueger with a facial tramp stamp, I wouldn’t go around instagramming selfies either.

Especially when I willingly ran into the arms of the dude who is nationally known for giving out facial tramp stamps.

          Wymack had even locked the office in his short absence. Neil had been in there enough times to know Wymack didn’t keep anything particularly valuable on his shelves. The only thing of any import was Neil’s duffel. (…) On Neil’s first day in South Carolina he had asked Wymack to protect his things, and seven months later Wymack was still keeping that promise. It was almost enough to make Neil forget all about Riko.

Guys, this just in: Wymack is still the best damn person alive. #dicksoutforwymack

The best damn person alive also already warned the Foxes Neil looked like a human punching bag in order to prevent them from having an actual heart attack when they see him. Yay, have fun explaining yourself to them, hombre.

          Matt moved soundlessly for a few moments before he finally managed to choked, “Jesus Christ, Neil.”

          “It’s not as bad as it looks,” Neil said.

This just in: Neil is Veronica from Heathers, minus the 80’s hair-do.

In order to fulfill his self-appointed role as Neil’s mother hen, Matt then swiftly goes and punches newly-arrived Kevin in the fucking face – which is generally a sentiment I can support, although it really is not his fault this time.

          Matt stared at him for an endless minute, then said, “I want to break [Riko’s] face in six places. If he ever comes within a thousand yards of you again –“

Same, Matt. Fucking SAME.

Matt being protective of Neil will never not give me a healthy dose of The Feels™.

One confrontation down, four to go: What do Aaron, Nicky and Kevin have to say to Mr Meat Grinder?

          Unsurprisingly, Aaron was the safest one to look at. (…) Neil gave him a moment to see if he’d ask, but all Aaron did was shrug.

Glad to see the usual amounts of sympathy and care coming from one half of the Minyard Murder Twins.

Although I’m doubting the other half will muster up any more affection.

          Nicky, on the other hand looked absolutely crushed as he took in Neil’s wrecked appearance. He reached out as soon as Neil was close enough and wrapped his hand around the back of Neil’s neck, (…) carefully pulling Neil up against him.

Also, glad to see the usual freaking normal reaction coming from Nicky, aka some goddamn comforting hugs for once in this cold, cold monster squad.

Nicky hugs are the best hugs.

          At least Kevin had the decency to speak in French. “Tell me the master didn’t approve this.”

Every time Kevin still calls Tetsuji “the master”, a little tiny thing inside my heart dies.

10/10 would protect my tiny big ass traumatized son.

          “Riko said he’d hurt us if I change it back. All I can do is duck my head and hope for the best.” (…)

          “How long do you think he’ll let you hide before he forces you to show [the tattoo] off? The press will be all over this (…). He’s trying to get you found.”

Well, duh.

I’m already looking forward to Neil regaining his confidence, and then I’m looking forward to him sassing the absolute everloving shit out of whoever tries to come for him for his appearance and tattoo.

          “He wouldn’t waste his time unless he thinks we really are going to be a problem for his team That means something, doesn’t it? (…) Kevin, you do what you do best and focus on Exy. Take us where he doesn’t want us to go.”

Hell effin yes.

We’re gonna fucking make it to finals, and we’re gonna fucking shoot that dumb Exy ball so hard around those Raven Fuckers’ heads that we shoot the asshole smirk right off Riko’s ugly face.

Yas.

          Nicky looked between them as if making sure they were done, then scooped his gift bags up again and held one out to Neil.

          “Belated Christmas present,” he said, a little sadly.

NICKY LET ME LOVE YOU.

Trust this dude to always bring the sunshine around at the end of the day.

          “I’ve got Andrew’s with me, too. Actually, I got you two the same thing because you are like the most impossible people in the world to buy for.”

Knives, hair dye, black T-Shirts, cigarettes, a coupon for an anger management course,… Andreil gift-shopping ain’t that hard, homie.

But scratch all that - Nicky got them each a winter coat!

This would have been even better if Nicky hadn’t gotten the same coat for each of them, but literally the same coat – because now all I can imagine is Neil and Andrew stuck in one coat like a Get Along Shirt.

If someone makes this into fanart, I will pay you in Ben & Jerry’s. I’m being dead serious.

Four reunions done and the most important one still to go – one road trip to Columbia later:

        “If you’ll sign in, I’ll ring Dr. Slosky and let him know you’re here.”

        (...) Neil was the only one who hesitated when his pen touched the paper. Riko hadn’t let him be “Neil” at Evermore. Every time Neil answered to it on the court, Riko beat him for it. (…) Riko wanted him to know how much trouble he’d caused the Moriyamas with all of his alibis.

Jesus fuck. Is there literally anything he didn’t get beat for at the Batcave of Extra?

Actually, don’t answer that.

Also, hate to be that person again but – shouldn’t he have gotten to that bit of trauma way earlier? Wymack and the Foxes called him Neil so many times already, why is this only kicking in now?

I legit don’t have an explanation and I think it may just be a continuity error. If anyone does have a good explanation, shoot me an ask.

They sit down to wait for Andrew and to everyone’s surprise (including mine), Kevin uses the wait to do something so incredibly out of character my figurative wig was instantly snatched:

Being a compassionate person.

        “I know what he’s like,” Kevin said. Neil looked at him, but Kevin was studying his hands. “Riko. If you want to talk.”

Fucking what.

        It was the most awkward and uncomfortable thing Kevin had ever said to him. Kevin was known for his talent, not his sensitivity. (…) That he tried at all was so unexpected Neil felt it like a balm to every bruised inch of his skin.

Oh my GOD.

HE’S TRYING, he’s trying to make Neil feel better, he just wants to help and to comfort him I’m gonna light myself the fuck on fire I can’t handle this.

These Kevin/Neil feels are ambushing me out of nowhere. I was almost over this dynamic, god damnit. What the fuck.

        “[Jean’s] father owed the Moriyamas a great deal. The master paid those debts in exchange for Jean’s presence on our court. He was property, nothing more. You are the same in their eyes. (…) I know it means he did not hold back.”

Wait – does this mean Jean initially got the same treatment that Neil just had to suffer through?

WELL, FUCK.

Jean Valjean has instantly risen in the ranks of my faves.

SWEET FRENCH SUMMER CHILD. YOU DID NOT DESERVE THIS WHAT THE FUCK.

No wonder he’s a (seemingly) heartless bitch now. Kill or be killed, I guess.

        “Were you ever going to tell [Coach that he’s your father]?”

        “I was going to when he signed me,” Kevin said. “I couldn’t. (…) [Tetsuji] has never raised a hand or voice against Coach before because Coach has never been a real threat to him. I didn’t know if a confession would change things. I couldn’t risk it.”

Kevin :’( protecting and caring for Wymack :’(( just like Wymack protected and cared for him :’((((((

Before I can get too emotional over this, though, the happy Kevin/Neil Honest Conversation™ is cut short by the arrival of everyone’s favourite murder maniac, minus the meds.

(Back at it again with the alliterations, y’all.)

        If Neil hadn’t known Andrew spent the last year and a half fiercely protective and territorial of Kevin, he’d think they were strangers. Andrew treated Kevin to a bored inspection, then flicked his fingers in dismissal.

Apparently, Andrew is not that different off his meds but continues to be a Stony Sinnamon Roll, Too Indifferent To This World, Too Dead Inside™. Well, bummer.

I don't know what I expected, since we did meet him sober before, but I think I thought when he'd be off his meds permanently he'd be... More? I guess? More of a person, I mean. Less walking void, and all that jazz.

Maybe he'll come around. Give the sinnamon roll some time.

Neil and the squad, finally complete again, drive back to campus, and as they get out we get a glimpse of something amazing we'll have more of later this chapter:

It's prime fucking Andreil time.

        [Neil] straightened and turned to find out Andrew had shifted closer. There was nowhere for Neil to stand except up against Andrew, but somehow Neil didn't mind. They'd been apart for seven weeks but Neil keenly remembered why he'd stayed. He remembered is unyielding, unquestioning weight that could hold him and all of his problems without breaking a sweat. For the first time in months he could finally breathe again. It was such a relief it was frightening; Neil hadn't meant to lean on Andrew so much.

ALL-FUCKING-RIGHT.

Alright alright alright. So NOT ONLY is this gay as shit as it is, and Neil is (whether he realises it or not) super fucking in love by this point, but - "Andrew had shifted closer", bitch, what.

Don't you dare tell me that boy isn't fucking infatuated with our favourite runaway drama queen.

In today's issue of The PSU Andreil Times: Heart-Eyed Little Shit Thinks He's Being Sneaky, Fails Miserably. More news on page 19.

When Neil is done waxing poetic about Andrew's ~strength~ and his ~*~unyiedling body~*~, he goes back to his dorm for part 2 of The Matt Confrontation:

        „Neil? We're here when you want to talk about it.“

        „I know.“

Is that... Neil... close to accepting actual help from outside...

Amazing.

        He knew just from looking at Matt that Matt would accept any truth Neil gave him right now, no matter how cruel or unbelievable. He'd done the right thing by going to Evermore; he was making the right choice in standing his ground here with the Foxes. (…) If [what happened] was the only way to keep his teammates safe from Riko's cruelty, it was an easy price to pay.

Okay ya brb while I drown myself in my own fucking tears.

FOX FAMILY. STOP RUINING MY FEELINGS. I'm supposed to be cool and witty here but I can't even do that because I'm just too emotional over this.

And the fun doesn't stop here, oh no.

Are you guys ready?

I know there are some people fidgeting excitedly in their seats right now because they know what's about to come up – the grand finale to a wonderful third-book-kick-off chapter:

The goddamn rooftop thing.

        Andrew turned to face him. „I'll take an explanation now.“

        „You couldn't ask for answers inside where it's warm?“ Neil asked.

Glad to see that even when faced with his (by now Confirmed™) crush, Neil still doesn't lose his sass.

But of course, Neil is not one to keep secrets from his murder boyfriend, and so he tells him of the Christmas Fuckery – which Andrew is decidedly not fucking liking, because of course Neil left Kevin's side and therefore kind of broke their deal.

Whoops.

        „Why did you go?“

        Neil didn't know if he could say it. Thinking about it was almost too much. Andrew was waiting, though, so Neil choked back his nausea. „Riko said if I didn't, Dr. Proust would-“

        Andrew clapped a hand over his mouth, smothering the rest of his words. (…) „Do not make the mistake of thinking I need your protection.“

Okay, but don't you, though?

Neil says it himself later on, and he's entirely correct: Andrew watches everyone's backs, who's gonna watch his?

He may be an expert in back-watching, but even the most back-watchiest back-watcher in the world can be out-back-watched, my dude. And who's gonna come rescue you then, hm? HMM??

Neil fucking will, of course.

        „The next time someone comes for you, stand down and let me deal with it. Do you understand?“

        „If it means losing you, then no.“

SHIT WHAT.

Since when are our boys so damn open with their love declarations?? This was so outta nowhere?? I'm fcukign?? Having a heart attack??

And following that – of course. The one, the only, the iconic:

        „I hate you,“ Andrew said casually. (…) „You were supposed to be a side effect of the drugs.“

        „I'm not a hallucination,“ Neil said, nonplussed.

        „You are a pipe dream,“ Andrew said.

BOY.

SHIT.

IM FCIKIGN FUCKKNGING FKUCKKVMFGNICHNNNKNX

The fact that Andrew thought his feelings (THAT ARE NOW CONFIRMED, I REPEAT, CONFIRMED ANDREW FEELINGS FOR NEIL HAVE BEEN SPOTTED) were a temporary thing, unreal, a side effect of being high out of his mind, is just like kind of, casually ruining my life. No biggie.

No fucking biggie.

Andrew quickly realizes he may have admitted too many feelings though, and in a feeble attempt to save his cold front and fragile masculinity, he throws Neil's keys off the roof, because just giving them back to him normally wouldn't have been Manly™ enough.

However Neil, once more, is able to show us that he can give as good as he gets (innuendo absolutely intended):

        Neil wasn't sure why he did it, but he plucked Andrew's cigarette off the sidewalk and stuck it between his lips. He tipped his head back to meet Andrew's unwavering gaze and tapped two fingers to his temple in Andrew's mocking salute. (…) It felt like a win, though Neil wasn't sure why.

Fucking hell.

These two are going to a) improve this last book exponentially and b) absolutely fucking ruin my life.

Nicki out.

As always: If you like what I do here and you want to help me continue writing fun things for you, please consider buying me a coffee. Every lil bit does absolutely help, getting me through uni and all that jazz. Thanks so much!!

[gheckoe]

JAMES’S CURATED QUALITY FANFICTION PRIMER

for @rev0lutions-of-ruin, who tumblr does not like letting me tag

foolish bird avoids ao3 for years and misses out on the Good Shit, but it will be okay! she has THIS now. ft. DUMB LONG-WINDED CAPTAIN AMERICA MOVIE EXPLANATIONS, because i don’t think you would watch those movies willingly.

lots of selection - pick and choose, but if you don’t read “out of the dead land” i will be very sad. just treat this as really weird queer genre fiction and you’ll be alright. fics with pornographic content are marked as such, but said content is easy to skip as long as you can pick up on the warning signs.

we’re gonna start with the funny stuff.

nanananana BAT-DAD! (no ships, just bruce being a dad. safe for work and hilarious,)

who needs therapy when you have microsoft excel.

tim drake (robin 3) is a transgender teenage disaster. and bruce wayne is just generally a disaster. (same series.)

okay, now let’s get kind of sad. but not TOO sad.

nananananananana BATMAN (and superman)

this one made watching batman vs. superman worth it. not quite. but kind of. it’s fantastic.

i forget what happens in this one but i know i enjoyed it!

snk? why this, james. why this.

bad show, i know, but. formative experience. i figured out i was trans by projecting my feelings onto jean kirchstein. (not sure how, that’s just what happened.)

this one is stupidly fucking huge, in first person, and still isn’t finished.

included by virtue of some weird nostalgia. it’s half a million words long. try the first few chapters; i can’t guarantee anything that happens. don’t fucking judge me.

boring, punch me in the feelings already. more angst!

STEVEBUCKY

i don’t think you’ve watched the captain america movies, so i will explain them.

the saddest, gayest shit you will ever see. will fuck with your heart, ideally! but (as per always), skip the porn. this fandom is really big on it. UGH.

BUT it’s based off of movie adaptations of comic books, so the backstory is... ridiculous. i will summarize it for you. (tumblr ate this so here goes again)

THE DYNAMIC/history/massive goddamn ship manifesto

two guys, sitting in the great depression, two feet apart because it’s not socially acceptable to be gay

steve: tiny, blonde, always mad and big on SOCIAL JUSTICE. gets into fights for SOCIAL JUSTICE, despite growing up in the great depression when SOCIAL JUSTICE was not a commonly-known phrase or a common thing. he’s a bit of a shit, and he gets into shit. with his scrawny lil fists. he has all sorts of chronic illnesses but somehow manages to survive in a time with shitty medicine, and grow up to get into MORE shit. likes art, but is (partially?) colorblind

also he’s VERY HEAVILY coded as trans.

bucky: taller, brown hair, very popular but secretly a bit of a nerd (loves scifi, and is good at math). likes dancing, girls, and getting steve out of situations that he’s clearly over his head in and talking shit about it after. a bit of a charmer, etcetera.

there are some good fics from this era (”pre-war”) but idk where they are in my bookmarks. will update later.

so wait, what happens?

bucky gets steve out of dumb situations (like fighting a guy for talking during a movie) for pretty much all of their life. childhood friends until after high school-ish.

BUT, bucky is either drafted into the us army (it’s wwii now) or enlists, and steve is left alone in brooklyn, new york, to get into shit, without anyone to bail him out or prevent him from getting into MORE shit. so he finally manages to lie his scrawny, ill ass into the army, and (as one does) volunteers to get experimented on by the american government.

wait, what the fuck

comic books, okay. don’t @ me.

steve manages not to die! he finds a really pretty, badass lady to bisexually fawn over in the army (peggy carter is a fucking miracle), the experiments are a success and he ends up BIG and cured of all his ailments and with superfast metabolism (no alcohol) and superfast healing. he’s made it! (he basically just got really fast, unrealistic HRT hahaha)

... except the army can’t replicate the embiggening process they did with steve because the scientist that did it got killed, and steve is made into a glorified prettyman mascot to sell war bonds, instead of going to punch nazis, which he would be better at. he is a terrible mascot.

meanwhile, bucky has a shitty goddamn time in the european theatre. it’s terrible. he gets kidnapped by the EVIL SCIENCE NAZIS and put in a freaky camp and experimented on, poor guy.

you said you ship them, right? they’ve barely interacted so far, man. what the fuck.

alright alright i’m getting to it

steve the dancing monkey (in his words) is doing a Morale-Raising tour in europe for the troops and they hate it and he hates it. he discovers that... oh shit... bucky and his regiment (?) have been kidnapped by HYDRA! (the science nazis.)

naturally, he of little training MUST go save bucky, because the people that actually know how to save people know that it would be pointless to try. but steve “dumb shit” rogers will do it his own damn self. don’t @ him either. it’s the 1940s so he doesn’t have a phone.

steve will walk to austria, if he has to!... but he actually just gets a plane ride there, from peggy carter the badass and some other guy who’s not that relevant right now.

he KICKS NAZI ASS, SAVES THE PRISONERS, and MAKES MEANINGFUL EYE CONTACT WITH BUCKY ONCE HE FINDS HIM IN THE EVIL SCIENCE NAZI EXPERIMENTATION ROOM. bucky’s so out of it that he barely even tries to question why his old friend is suddenly hot  TALL.

steve and the lads walk back from austria, and he is a Bona Fide War Hero and not just a mascot. he has the stylish grime and everything. on the way, he realizes that the lads are pretty cool, and assembles a Diverse Crack Squad of Guys That Really Wanna Kill Nazis from the cool guys he just met. upon return to wherever they were earlier, steve is made a REAL CAPTAIN now, and his Diverse Crack Squad is at liberty to... go kill nazis.

bucky tags along. he is very handsome and talented at math, so he is a SNIPER and saves steve’s dumb ass (from getting shot by nazis, instead of getting punched in the face) like he used to. the Diverse Crack Squad gears up to take down THE WORST OF THE SCIENCE NAZIS, on a train in the mountains! they can change the course of COMIC BOOK WWII!

you said it was tragic. show me the tragic.

the TRAIN INFILTRATION does not go as planned, and bucky is knocked from the train and falls to his cold, painful, (presumably) death. steve can’t watch.

they catch a REALLY BAD SCIENCE NAZI, but it is a very hollow victory. steve goes and tries to get drunk in a blown-up bar where he hung out with bucky and they were really queer together.

the OTHER really bad science nazi now has a plan to BLOW UP COMIC BOOK NEW YORK! steven will NOT allow this to happen.

he’s also kind of given up on life. he has a flair for the dramatic, and also the ambiguously suicidal.

not that being ambiguously suicidal adds to the Dramatic Romance of this. it doesn’t, and that would be creepy. the point is that steve rogers has a LOT of issues, including the ones that science can’t cure.

this SPECIFIC PLANE is headed towards new york, full of explosives. steve manages to get aboard the plane... and doesn’t even try to escape. he crashes it into the water in the atlantic ocean, saying goodbye to peggy on the radio as it hits. he is also presumed dead. it’s... basically a suicide attempt.

flash forward seventy-some years.

wait, wasn’t he in the avengers?

steve rogers is found inside the frozen plane encased in ice in the ocean. he’s revived (super healing, woop) and... doesn’t say anything, because he’s really not up to expressing feelings.

he has a TERRIBLE time. all of his friends are dead or old and went about their lives without him, and he’s alone in a confusing new world. (but the food is better, vaccines are good, and no polio.) he’s not fantastic at making new friends, because, as shown by him and bucky’s entire relationship, he’s a bit of a sad introvert and just picks one person and... holds on.

blah blah avengers one blah blah, new team and fighting BAD THINGS. but steve is too angsty to make friends. he joins the new security organization that peggy founded, SHIELD, without really inspecting it that well because... he didn’t plan to be alive past flying the plane into the ice, much less in the 21st century. he doesn’t know what he’d do otherwise.

idk that sounds a little slow

he has DEPRESSION. it is a little slow. but it’ll pick up! (not emotionally.) now it’s very anti-establishment action flick. enter CAPTAIN AMERICA (2): THE WINTER SOLDIER.

steve makes a friend. actually, two! sam and natasha are wonderful, and they have some things in common. but steve obtains friendship while realizing that SHIELD is corrupt to the core and actually infiltrated by HYDRA, so he and his new friends have to... burn it to the ground. he “died” (or tried to) to stop HYDRA, and it’s still here and worse then ever. things feel pointless.

to make it worse, he’s fighting this creepily effective impersonal masked assassin on a bridge and oh fuck, oh fuck it’s bucky and didn’t he die years and years ago and his arm is METAL what happened to him, and he’s pretending not to recognize steve.

HYDRA is planning to eliminate sources of resistance for their new world order via shooting them from the air, so steve has to take one specific FLYING DEATHMACHINE down. he does, and brainwashed HYDRA bucky, the winter soldier, is there to stop him.

steve makes an appeal to emotions. “bucky stop you can’t do this”

bucky is confused, but he’s been programmed to do this.

steve tells his coworkers to JUST SHOOT THE DEATHMACHINE DOWN ALREADY, because he’s... given up again. he’s very talented at equating heroism with self-sacrifice/suicide. but he disables the DEATH part of the DEATHMACHINE without it getting shot down.

bucky has been trapped underneath a beam, but steve’s with bucky till the end of the line, even if bucky is brainwashed and lacking memories. steve drops his shield in the water and falls.

it’s another attempt to die. stop that, steve. go to therapy.

bucky doesn’t remember who he is, but he jumps after him. steve is very injured from his fight with bucky, and wouldn’t have survived the fall, but bucky drags him to shore and... leaves.

steve wakes up in the hospital with his new friend sam. they’re going to track bucky down, even if it takes forever.

ISN’T THAT FUCKED UP? isn’t that sad? it’s terrible. now, fics. most of them are after ca:tws, because that’s when the ship got popular. a lot of them center around Finding Bucky and Getting To Know Him Again.

there’s a lot of sappy sad let’s-teach-bucky-how-to-be-a-person-again-and-get-steve-to-be-less-sad but i like the ones that are like sad action movies, or sad queer movies, and less like sad romance movies. my bookmarks are a mess, so here’s the best stuff i could dredge up.

out of the dead land: this one kills me every single time. there’s something terribly cinematic about it. but, as fandom is wont to do, there’s porn near the end. skip that part. ew. it’s an introspective scifi action epic, with just enough identity issues to make you want to cry! READ IT, IT’S IMPORTANT.

this: alternate universe, sans steve “dying.” epistolary. sad, as far as i can remember. (i’d rec the rest of this series but i think it’s best if you read this one first?)

courtroom/media fic. what if the winter soldier got arrested after the movie? (cap fandom does this kind of fake-media thing very well. i just reread it. it’s still good.)

this one isn’t exactly groundbreaking, but it’s a different take on the fandom’s typical post-winter soldier bucky interpretation. quite short, 100% safe for work.

in this one, steve successfully gets drunk, makes some friends, and gains some coping skills. good for dark humour. there’s porn somewhere but i’m sure it’s easily skippable, otherwise i wouldn’t have bookmarked it. not 100% the best thing every but it’s pretty fun.

if you aren’t team s/b all the way then we can’t be friends, but here’s some other marvel stuff i guess

lesbians, ballet, feelings? it’s a rarepair but it’s pretty lovely. au, no background knowledge required. basically a beautiful indie film that’s kind of oscar-bait. you will like this one, i think. there’s probably porn somewhere.

trans black widow. (that chapter only, not sure what the rest is). not very well-written and i have terrible memory but i’m 75% sure it made me cry.

ENJOY! or try to. don’t feel obligated to. but please at least TRY out of the dead land, it is groundbreaking.

[ventooreos]

Earlier today I thought “I’ll probably have chapter 11 out sometime this week!” Well psyche to myself, I finished it today. I almost named this chapter seafood, since I found myself making a lot of allusions to marine life... This chapter was fun, but it was a bit difficult at times to write so many people who are so full of emotion. I’ve gotten everything to a point I’m satisfied with, and I hope you all enjoy it!

Title: Story of Assassins Chapter: 11 - Fedeltà Characters: La Sqaudra Di Esecuzione, Trish Una, Buccellati’s Team, Cannolo Murolo, Tiziano Rating: T Words: 6,462 Summary: The confrontations in Venice leave everyone emotionally charged. Despite everything, they’re forced to handle the fallout and choose what paths they’ll walk next. 

“Goodness gracious, you two have certainly seen better days.” Murolo’s sudden presence in the bell tower was eerie. Tiziano’s head whipped around. His pulse had already been racing, but the man’s sudden appearance had thrown it’s beat into an erratic tantrum.

The guard bit his lip. He felt almost unable to respond. Panic was overflowing inside of him. Dread and mourning swirled beside it as he clutched his partner’s body. Squalo lay limp in his grasp. His ginger hair had been stained a deeper red when chunks of his skull had been bashed apart. Tiziano wanted to believe he still felt a pulse, that the gaping wound in the head of his companion wasn’t a death sentence. He clung to the shaking he felt in his hand. The throws of denial he found himself in were enough to blur the clear fact that it was caused by his own frayed nerves and nothing else.

 “It might be about time you give up on your friend there.” Murolo craned his neck, trying to peek past Tiziano to get a better look at the man he was holding. “You’ve got more work to do, and we certainly won’t get anywhere if you keep clinging to dead weight.”

 Dead. The word hit the guard like an iron pike. He’d wanted to keep that word from his mind, to banish it and never let the possibility of it’s truth soak into him. Murolo frowned as Tiziano grew stiffer.

 “Though I suppose I should give you two a moment. I can count my blessings while I wait - Awfully lucky that those assassins took out that nasty Clash for me! And not just them, the boss’s daughter too! What an incredible show!” Murolo marvelled. The drama that he’d just witnessed was what he lived for. “I didn't know she had it in her, but really I should have expected nothing less from someone sharing the blood of a devil.” The man chuckled and shook his head.

 Tiziano had long since stopped listening. The words that concerned him had come earlier - What work was left to be done? He’d failed. He would die from the wounds he sustained here or be executed by his superiors. Without Squalo, he was weak. He could do little to serve as a member of the elite guard squad. Whoever the man before him was, he knew this. He knew too much.

 “What do you mean?” Tiziano couldn’t hide the tremor in his voice. “Who are you?”

 “Ah, you’re ready to talk now? Well then,” Murolo cleared his throat. “I’m a friend of yours, Tiziano. I’m in charge of knowing about all the going ons in Passione, and I just need you to help me with that!”

 “No one knows everything about Passione-”

 “Precisely, and that includes you.” Murolo clicked his tongue. “Arrogant kids like you are a dime a dozen. You have no respect for anyone and you go on tangents without even thinking. You’re just a guard dog. A well groomed one, but a guard dog nonetheless!” He adjusted the brim of his hat, internally reminding himself to get back to the point. “No one knows everything about Passione, therefore no one could know if someone knew everything about Passione.”

 Tiziano wasn’t one to get lured into an argument, and this was no exception. He may not have known the man standing before him, but years of service in Passione had taught him to never underestimate a foe. His hand curled tighter around Squalo’s limp arm. The ginger had always been the more rash of the two.

 But with what had happened today, he couldn’t find fault in his partner’s actions. How could he have known that the boss’s daughter had a stand? One capable of such destruction no less. He wouldn’t bemoan the mistakes of Squalo, he couldn’t bring himself to. It was a cruel twist of fate. Just another unfair slant in the structure of the universe.

 “As it turns out, you have to do a bit of work to stay up to date.” Murolo stuck a bony finger out toward the guard. “That’s where you’ll be helping me. A few questions, then I’ll help you be on your merry way.”

 ---

 A tangible tension had come to rest in the room. It swirled between the four like the ocean waves; It connected them, yet pressed them apart.

 The expression Trish wore today was unlike any other that the assassins had ever seen on her. Her eyes were trained dead ahead - she wouldn’t let them drop to the floor or drift askance. There were things she needed to say. The task seemed impossible - colossal - but by now she’d overcome far worse.

 Risotto had stood to meet them when she’d arrived with Ghiaccio. It took mere seconds for him to realize the changes between them. The boy’s actions weren’t those of a guard watching a recaptured prisoner. He seemed to be shrinking away from her ever so slightly. Ghiaccio’s body language was far from subtle, it painted a clear change in dynamic. Risotto would need to act accordingly.

 “I see you had an exciting day.” Risotto gestured towards the broken window. He could have just as easily called attention to the drenched clothes that clung to her frame or the disheveled tangle that was once a carefully styled updo, but perhaps it was better to wait for an explanation there.

 Trish nodded in response. The Capo knew that he hadn’t offered the greatest opener, but there much to say and no good way to say it. A myriad of questions floated to the forefront of his mind, but it was obvious that this was not the time to demand answers.

 He was already exhausted. The events of the day played on a continuous loop in his mind. Each new detail his men brought him only added to the chaos. Just moments ago he and Prosciutto had come to the conclusion that Trish was gone for good - she had escaped and would never return. Briefly he’d considered sending Illuso to search for her, but the chances he would capture her again were slim and the dark haired man was already shaken over Formaggio’s state.

 When Risotto had first seen the dark haired man, he had assumed that it was Illuso who had been harmed. Streaks of red decorated his clothes, accumulated from time spent toting Formaggio’s mangled form.

 Needless to say, when he found out the state of the true victim he’d felt a weight drop to his stomach.

 “I..” The single syllable stretched on for longer than Trish would have liked. It brought Risotto’s focus back to the situation at hand. The Capo’s eyes briefly flicked to Ghiaccio. His glare was trained on her as he kept a measured, cautious distance between himself and the boss’s daughter. “I have some things I need to ask you.” She gulped and crossed her arms. “I expect answers.”

 “Then ask.” Trish blinked. Was Risotto serious? Was he daring her? The wall of a man was impossible to read. Every word he spoke was utterly dry and somber. Decoding anything hiding behind the surface was impossible.

 Trish took a deep breath, calming her nerves that were on the brink of panic. Each time they had spoken, Risotto had shown a surprising respect for her. Judging by precedent, it wouldn’t make sense for him to suddenly change his disposition.

 “So. Your main goal here is to murder my father. The Don of Passione.” It was more statement than question.

 “Yes.” Risotto nodded curtly. “That’s what we want.”

 “Alright. Just wanted to get that out there. Second question: Your intent was to use me as a lead, but that didn’t work out so I became a hostage right?”

 “That’s true as well.” As Risotto answered, Prosciutto frowned. To him it seemed that they were giving Trish quite a bit of leeway. It was dangerous.

 “And what would happen if it turned out I was useless as a hostage?” This question was more pointed than the others. Trish’s brow had creased and her lips pursed after finishing the sentence.

 “This is ridiculous, there are more important things that need our-” Prosciutto raised an eyebrow as he began his rant, only to be silenced by his Capo’s perturbed glare coming to rest on him. Words crashed to a halt immediately at the clear reprimandation.

 Risotto’s focus centered once again on the girl. The shallow breaths she pulled in were barely enough to feed the flare of fear and defiance in her chest. Ghiaccio lurked near the door. His eyes had left the scene inside the room. At the moment he preferred to look out into the barren hallway.

 “Would you kill me?” Trish’s question was just above a whisper, but it was more than enough to cut through the silence of the room. Maintaining eye contact with a rogue assassin after asking such a question took every inch of courage she held. He gave no clues to his thoughts, no sign of what answer he might give.

 This was a possibility that Risotto had grappled with before. When it became apparent that Trish held no clues about her father’s identity, the Capo had had to rapidly change plans. At the time he hadn’t been able to fathom a reason that she might not work as a hostage, but he still considered it. Every possibility needed to be covered if they were to survive. He already knew his answer.

 “No. I’d tell you to leave.”

 Trish froze. A sense of relief was crawling up her spine and prickling at her neck, but she couldn’t give in too it. She couldn’t allow herself to feel any bit of ease yet. Could she even trust Risotto? Truthfully, there was a part of her that respected him. He was honest with her and treated her like a human, despite having no true obligation to. To Trish he was the most familiar and reassuring - which seemed contradictory to his overall appearance.

 What about the other two? The blond who Risotto had interrupted wasn’t too terrible. He was strict with her and a bit uptight, but that could be chalked up to the stress of the situation. Well, maybe it wasn’t her place to make excuses for him. But in the hours she’d spent drifting in and out of sleep in the back of his car, she’d caught pieces of the conversation he’d had with the assassin named Pesci.

 He seemed different at that time. Calmer, more tutor than mafioso. Throughout the drive to Venice Prosciutto had shared facts about the Jazz albums and artists he’d played through the car’s speakers. The bulkier assassin had nodded along intently, asking questions whenever something peaked his interest or he thought Prosciutto might just want to talk further on a topic. Their conversation flowed naturally, the pattern of speech between them was familiar and their roles well-defined.

 If she was going to do this, she needed to remind herself of those traits. She needed to see the humanity behind the lethal facade and accept the truth of it. Over time it had become clear that these men weren’t simply looking for a paycheck. If this was a cold, detached money grab, things would be different. They were fighting to protect each other - They probably had no other option at this point.

 No one had been abandoned. Not Melone when his arm was lost, nor Formaggio after the myriad wounds he’d sustained. There was no such thing as dead weight.

 Trish hoped she could use that to define all of them. After all, her contact with the assassins had been fairly limited. She had begun to piece together portraits of a few of them, but others remained mysteries. Could she really believe someone was good without completely remembering their name?

 She didn’t have time to study each of them, she would have to act now. The girl had come this far. She was willing to gamble on the judgement of others, even if they could easily be mistaken for villains.

 “And what if I didn’t leave?” Trish’s words were stern. She waited to see the the assassins’ reactions, feeling as if she were testing the temperature of water.

 Risotto’s brow furrowed. He wasn’t angry, but he clearly didn’t like her response. He was dismayed - obstinate perhaps. The Capo turned her sentence over in his head. He hadn’t misheard her. Maybe he was misinterpreting?

 “No. We’ll be gone without a trace. You can stay here if that’s easiest for-”

 “I meant I’m not going to just leave if you tell me to.” She cut in, claws ready and confident. “I don’t mean the hotel, and I don’t mean Venice. I mean this whole..” She gestured to the two men in the room and to the boy in the hall. “Situation.”

 If Risotto had been surprised by her interruption, he refused to show it. But his expression had changed: It had hardened as Trish spoke. He now resembled a viper. Slowly he rose to his feet. His menacing form blocked the light that streamed in from the broken window, casting a shadow over the girl. Darkness was cast into his features, nearly melding them into the black hood that adorned his head.

 Trish felt tinier than the day she’d been abducted. Intimidation was a natural skill of Risotto’s, something he’d mastered even before joining Passione. Even as Trish fought to hold steady to the fact of his humanity, she couldn’t help but feel an urge to flee. His current actions painted him as a demon. The light pushing past the sides of his figure wasn’t holy or soft, it was a glaring juxtaposition to his being. He was a splash of black ink running down the portrait in front of her.

 “This isn’t the world you belong in.” Risotto’s heavy voice made the statement feel more like a command.

 “Well then I guess it’s too bad I was born into it.” Trish raised a hand to her hip and looked up at Risotto. This was the first time the assassin had truly tried to scare her, but she felt almost used to this behavior. She was at least familiar enough with it to not let it completely unnerve her.

 Risotto was taken aback by her sudden boldness. Whatever had happened today, it had changed her. He examined her, more carefully this time. She wore minor scrapes. Bruises were slowly darkening on her skin. They could be signs of an altercation, but they could just as easily be inflicted by trying to navigate the environment in a panic. It wasn’t likely that she’d tried to fight with Ghiaccio - This wasn’t the type of damage White Album left behind.

 Aside from that, it would take more than a fist fight to change someone in such a way. Considering her bloodline, Risotto had a theory of what may have taken place.

 “You don’t understand what you’re trying to do.” Risotto paused. What Trish wanted was inane. It went against what her basic instincts should have been telling her. “And yet, we are in no position to deny you a place here.”

 “WHAT?!” Prosciutto exclaimed from behind his Capo. The sheer shock of Risotto’s sudden surrender proved to much for him to suppress the outburst. Trish was similarly surprised by how easily the man caved. Her features softened into a look of astonishment, but instead of lingering in disbelief like the blond, she quickly moved to a smile.

 “Do you have a complaint?” Risotto looked back at his comrade. He considered his decision final, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t open to criticism from the man he trusted most.

 “Risotto, have you lost her mind? This is-” Prosciutto brought a hand to his head, fighting to decide which problem to point out first. “She’s the boss’s daughter.” He raised a hand and lifted one finger. “She’s supposed to be a hostage. And for god sake, she’s a little girl!” When he’d finished, he had raised three of his fingers. “How the hell does any of this add up to a good idea?”

 “Something tells me you may be underestimating our friend. But you’re right, she was our hostage. Now she’s not. We were the ones who kidnapped her in the first place, so do we really have any right to say no if she now wants to stay here by choice?” Risotto was calm as he spoke.

 “I just think it’s dangerous, Risotto. I know you can’t honestly be blind to how this could go awry.” Prosciutto crossed his arms and reached into his pocket to retrieve his cigarette case. Risotto closed his eyes and nodded in response.

 “Of course.” His attention turned back to the boss’s daughter. “Trish, I don’t know on what grounds you’ve made this decision, but I need you to know what you’re asking to become a part of.” The girl nodded. Her smile dissolved, leaving a look of intense focus on her face.

 Risotto combed a hand through the hair that stuck out of his hood and sighed. How could he even begin to explain the horrors Trish might see? The danger she could be putting herself in? Was he really able to allow that? Of course, she’d already been exposed to some of it. Mostly after effects, but those would still give her a pretty good idea of what his squad faced on a daily basis.

 “Trish, this is something that will leave a stain on you if you get involved with it. Our work is hell, and with our current status as traitors, we’re even despised by the underworld. As the boss’s daughter, you get a free pass out of here if we’re defeated. If you begin to sympathize with us, I can’t tell what effect that could have.” As the assassin spoke, Trish cast her gaze downward.

 “That’s the thing though, I’m not going to get that kind of treatment.” She balled her hand into a loose fist. Risotto waited for the girl to continue. “They- He wants me dead. The people who came after us couldn’t have sent a more explicit message.” She paused. “That’s why I needed to know what would happen when you found out.”

 Risotto’s features were solemn. He and his teammates hadn’t had time to conference about what had happened yet. Ghiaccio had slunk back to the door way at some point in the conversation. It was a rare sight to see him so quiet. Under most circumstances he had no qualms about throwing his two cents in.

 “Ghiaccio, can you confirm this?” It was likely that the boy had seen what had happened, perhaps he had even been directly involved. The blue haired assassin looked up from the patch of carpet he’d been staring at.

 “Yeah it’s..” Ghiaccio’s arms were crossed. He looked uncomfortable. “It’s just like what she said. They went after her with intent to kill.

 “And you’re sure they didn’t just fail to recognize who she was?”

 “There was no mistaking it.” Ghiaccio shook his head. “Given the opportunity to go after any of us, she was their first priority.” Risotto raised an eyebrow.

 “Any of us?” He questioned before waving off the statement. “No, we can discuss that later. Trish, I’m sorry.” Risotto raised a hand to the side of his head. It wasn’t the death of their main lead that troubled him.

 The revelation, in Risotto’s eyes, had increased their sins tenfold.

 “Uh, thanks, I guess.” Trish’s posture softened. “But you already apologised, so you don’t have to do it again?” There was no clear way for her to respond. The situation felt awkward.

 “No, this is different. It’s all different now.” Risotto turned away from her and moved back to where he’d previously been sitting. “Members of our team were originally responsible for finding out about your connection to the boss. We started all this. We’re the ones who put your life in danger.” Risotto’s wounds still ached from the battle he’d endured merely an hour ago. He was sore. He was bloodied. Giorno had helped to heal him, but the boy had only been able to get his wounds to a point where they weren’t fatal.

 There was a new addition to his colony of pains. A deep sinking in his chest. A hollow, steel cavity being dug out from within him. Trish’s eyes followed the man. Truthfully there was a bit of comfort in how seriously Risotto was taking the matter. But that didn’t relieve the sense of anxiety within her.

 “I mean.. I kinda thought you guys were the ones putting my life in danger from the start?” The girl shrugged. This didn’t change things for her. The chasm between their reactions to this information really only made the situation feel clumsy. Maybe she’d just had more time to process.

 But then again, this was going to be awkward. It was going to be strange, and a bit uncomfortable. Getting used to that reality now would be better.

 “I know this is all really strange, but I think it can work and I think it makes sense.” Trish began her explanation, leading Risotto to turn his head toward her. “Really I’m glad. This has gone well so far, I think.”

 “I think it’s a stretch to say this has gone well for you at all.” The assassin cut in. “I can’t see why you’d want to stay in this situation.”

 “Right, I was getting to that.” Trish rolled her eyes. “Listen to me for a second. Do you know about Sea Anemones and Clownfish? It’s ‘symbiosis.’ Usually Sea Anemones will attack anything that gets too close, but not Clownfish. The Anemone actually protects the fish. Get it? Outside the Anemone Clownfish have a lot of predators - Sharks, for one.” She pointed at Risotto. “I’m already too deeply entrenched in this mess to leave. If I did, Passione’s boss would surely send hitmen after me. But you guys are the mafia’s natural enemy now.”

 “Well.” A slight grin appeared on Risotto’s face. “You have thought this through. But I have to ask, what makes you think you’re going to get a group of highly trained killers to act as your bodyguards for free?”

 “First of all, you already accepted it.” Trish met his grin with a smile of her own. “Second, you obviously feel guilty about this whole mess. Third, who said anything about free? Why don’t you ask Doctor Freeze over there what I did to that shark?” The Capo gave Ghiaccio a questioning glance. The boy was obviously upset by the nickname, but quickly shook his head at his Capo and mouthed ‘long story.’

 Risotto Nero was not a man who enjoyed being out of the loop. It was his job to be up to date with information concerning his team. This sort of allusionary back and forth annoyed him to no end. His mind sprinted through a hundred different scenarios. No matter what the truth was, Trish’s implications were clear.

 “Hold on.” Risotto gestured for her to pause. “I don’t exactly know what you’re talking about, but if you think you’re going to be involved in any violence, you’re wrong.” Trish furrowed her brow. The assassin wasn’t joking, he was dead serious.

 “If I need to fight I’m going to.” She protested.

 “If you’re so worried about safety, you’d be wise to avoid the battlefield.” Risotto’s tone had become stern. The way his heavy baritone filled the room made it clear that there would be no arguing with his decisions. “Protect yourself, but don’t turn reckless.”

 “Fine.” Trish sighed. It was strange how casual the conversation had begun to feel. The girl turned on her heel and took a step towards the room’s exit.

 “Where are you going?” Trish froze. Risotto didn’t sound angry, but there was certainly something akin to annoyance in his voice. “You still have a lot to explain. If you want to be a part of this group, even in the weakest sense, you’re going to follow orders and contribute like everyone else.” The girl crossed her arms.

 “Look, I’m just going to get some ice.” She breathed out. “My lungs are drenched in salt water right now, so I want something refreshing to drink. Is that alright?”

 “Go on then.” Risotto shrugged.

 Trish continued towards the door, satisfied with the answer she’d received. Ghiaccio had left it ajar when he’s slunk into the room. As she clasped the knob, the ease with which the door swung open struck her.

 Little force was needed to get through this time.

 ---

 Fugo felt as if his consciousness had been forced from his body. He felt hazy, like his mind had splattered across the wall. Dripping hues of thought soaked into wallpaper as he desperately tried to tie together reality with threads of logic. Nothing made sense. But it did, it made complete sense. What Buccellati had told them was the unequivocal reality.

 His mouth felt dry. He looked down at Narancia, who sat at the table next to him. The boy was biting his nails, staring downward. To see him so insanely focused on a single point - in this case, the cup of coffee in front of him - was far from normal. Jagged tips were beginning to form at the ends of Narancia’s fingers as he indulged the nervous habit.

 A mangled piece of nail fell into his cup.

 “You need to stop that, you’re just going to end up bleeding.” Fugo’s voice was flat as he spoke. Disbelief stung and challenged him. They were no longer affiliated with Passione. When they’d lost Trish, they’d lost their privilege to live. Narancia paid Fugo no mind. “Are you even listening? I said stop that!” The blond’s voice began to crescendo. He could feel his chest shaking. Their decommissioning wasn’t the worst part of the current situation. Their Capo had been actively conspiring with the new recruit and planning treason.

 They wanted to orchestrate an entire coup. They were insane.

 “Stop biting your fucking nails Narancia!” Fugo’s hand shot forward, clamping onto Narancia’s wrist and knocking the boy’s hand into the cup of coffee. A sharp crack pulsed against their ears as it clattered from the saucer and splashed across the table. Abbacchio’s eyes snapped towards the scene. The pathetic little bar was too small for him to avoid their ruckus, comprised of only four tables and a half wall that divided the rest of the space from the bar itself.

 “Fugo, what the fuck!” The dark haired boy grabbed Fugo’s tie, his jagged nails scraping against skin in the process.

 “You’re being disgusting!” He hissed. Fugo wasn’t sure if the shaking in his hand was his own or Narancia’s.

 “And you’re being a dick!” Narancia pulled himself from the other’s grasp and stood up. Coffee had begun to drip through the slats of wooden table. The boy rubbed his wrist and glared at his friend.

 “Christ, could you both be quiet?” Abbacchio rubbed his temples and slumped against the wall. “Just make your goddamn choice. Stay or go before Bruno gets back.” The two boys had paused their squabbling to listen to him. Fugo’s eyes fell on the door.

 Buccellati and Giorno had left after revealing their true intentions, stating that when they returned their next steps would begin. Their Capo had always been a kind man. He’d told them that they were no longer under his command, that they had no need to listen to him or even to feel obligated to stay by his side. His actions now gave them a chance to leave. They wouldn’t need to confront him. They were free to go, and there was no need to make it feel like a betrayal.

 Mista had walked out of the bar almost immediately after Buccellati and Giorno had left. He hadn’t said a word, and Fugo had been too shocked to speak. Out of everyone there, Mista seemed the least likely to hold loyalties to Passione or to fear what might happen to them. As he had left, even Abbacchio had turned his gaze away.

 But was Mista really wrong to go? By leaving, Mista was giving himself a shot at life. As things were, their entire unit was a failure that Passione would eventually need to wipe out. With the coup that Buccellati was planning, they’d rise to the top of the hit list.

 Fugo stepped away from the table. He felt light headed. Soon the empty spaces in his brain would be flushed with a migraine, he could always feel them coming on. He crossed the creaky floor and laid a hand on the doorknob.

 “I’m leaving, and I think you all should too.” His shoulders were tight. Fugo wanted to face the others to give his statement, but something in his heart wouldn’t let him.

 “Don’t tell me what to do.” Narancia mumbled as he raised his feet onto his chair and hugged his knees to his chest. The door closed behind Fugo.

 The day was too bright outside the bar, bringing on the pain in his temple faster. The blond raised his hand to shield his eyes. Where was he supposed to go? The streets of Venice were foreign to him. Even if he found a map, what would his destination be? Up until now, his place in the world was wherever his gang was. That was no longer an option. It’s not like he could go home - that was definitely of the table.

 Where else had he existed before Passione? There was a University that he’d been expelled from. A prison cell he’d been abandoned in. The only location that didn’t feel cold and grim to him was his Grandmother’s house, but it had likely been resold or demolished at this point.

 “Hey, you’re not really about to leave, are you?” The voice cut Fugo from his thoughts. He looked down. Mista was leaning against the building, his legs crossed under him to stay in the shadow of the overhang.

 “What are you- I thought you left?” Fugo was incredulous. Part of him had already accepted that he’d never see Mista again.

 “What?” The teen raised an eyebrow. “Why would I do that? Fugo, that would be stupid.” The blond blinked.

 “You do realize Passione wants us dead, right?” Fugo questioned.

 “Yeah so?” Mista shrugged. “Who cares about Passione? People always want us dead. People inside the mafia attacked us just last week, and we were still members back then.”

 “But that was different, those were just thugs.” Fugo retorted. “The boss will send real trained killers after us this time!”

 “Dude, we’re real trained killers.” Mista rolled his eyes. Fugo was his friend, but the guy could be unbearable sometimes. “That’s our job description, and there’s strength in numbers. That’s not even what matters most.” Mista paused. “Buccellati.” He gestured with a flat hand as he said the name. “If it wasn’t for him, I’d be rotting in a cell right now. I’m with Capo all the way, Giorno too. Fugo, you can do whatever you want, but personally I think you need to turn that brain of yours off for a minute, stop over thinking, and make your decision.”

 Fugo looked away. He couldn’t convince Mista of anything - He wasn’t even trying to right now. Maybe he was right. Not thinking about it went against everything Fugo believed, but so did this entire situation.

 The teen took a deep breath before joining Mista on the ground. He laid his back against the wooden door. It’s paint was chipping, and if he moved at the wrong angle he would surely get splinters. Fugo turned his gaze toward the city. Cobbled streets. Tall faded buildings. He felt a faint anxiety creep over him, Giorno and Bruno could appear somewhere among them any at any moment. What was going to happen then? He felt a hand grab his arm.

 “I know I said turn off your brain, but I didn’t mean forever.” Fugo gave Mista a confused glare. Wasn’t this what the other had wanted? “If you lean against the door, someone’s going to hit you. Plus if you sit in the sun like that you’ll get all red like a lobster.” The teen motioned for Fugo to join him in the shadow of the awning. The blond complied, scooching toward the other.

 The two boys sat in silence for a time. Thousands of thoughts and concerns zipped through Fugo’s head. Meanwhile, Mista seemed oddly tranquil. He pulled out his gun and began polishing it, taking care to inspect every inch. To him these actions were natural. He trusted Buccellati and Giorno. There was nothing more to it in his mind.

 Fugo didn’t lack trust in his leader. He feared hypotheticals. Probability, logic, and caution ruled his life. Every moment needed control, that was what he strove for. The current situation felt like chaos, and it put him on edge.

 But in that moment he was glad to have Mista by his side. The presence of another human would keep him from panicking. Here he was grounded. Had he gone off on his own, Fugo might have already been overwhelmed.

 “Hey,” Mista straightened up. “They’re back.” The blond followed his gaze. Sure enough, the familiar forms of Giorno and Buccellati had rounded a corner and were heading toward them. The two teens stumbled to their feet. They could feel their Capo’s eyes wash across them. Buccellati was doing his best to conceal any emotion. Still, Fugo could see traces of his true feelings - Not fear, but something akin to it. Something lonelier.

 “Is it just the two of you?” Buccellati’s voice was strong. It wouldn’t betray his feelings.

 “No,” Fugo blinked, realizing what the scene must have looked like. “The others are just still inside.” As the sentence spilled out of his mouth, he couldn’t help but be transfixed by how quickly he was settling back into his normal role. Buccellati visibly relaxed as he answer.

 “Then I’ll grab the others and we can begin.” He pulled the door open and stepped inside. The frame emitted a loud creak as the door swung shut behind him. Fugo turned back to Mista.

 “Why did you come out here in the first place?” He questioned. “We all thought you had left.”

 “What?” Mista furrowed his brow, insulted by their assumption. “They really thought I’d leave? That bar just gave me the creeps, okay? I didn’t like it’s vibe.” The boy shook his head and turned away from Fugo.

 The blond couldn’t understand why the place had shaken him. Sure, it was old and a bit run down, but they’d been to such places in the past. All the place consisted of was a bar, a dividing wall, and a seated area of four tables, and-

 Ah.

 -

 “Formaggio is doing as well as he can be right now.” Illuso leaned against the wall of the hotel room. “Not great, but alive.” He’d felt restless since returning from the rescue mission. Their enemies were still somewhere out there, and they’d made an excellent show of brutality. Melone and Illuso had joined the rest of their squad - bar Formaggio - to report on everything that had happened.

 “Internal bleeding is our biggest concern right now.” Melone chimed in his analysis. The blond’s posture suggested fatigue, but his expression made it clear that he was more than willing to work through a bit of drowsiness. “He could easily have some organ damage, but it’s hard to say how extreme the problem is. I’ll keep tabs on him for now.” Risotto nodded.

 “It’s good to see you on your feet. Thank you.” With their recount, a full picture of the day’s events had finally formed. The attacks seemed less planned out than he had initially guessed. The squad led by Buccellati was certainly the other branch of Assassins working under Passione, but their approach felt all wrong.

 Snuffing out another squad was done quick and dirty. There was no need to press for information. Passione had it’s own branch dedicated to interrogation, so why had the girl Illuso spoke of put Formaggio through such harsh questioning? It went against the job, it allowed for mistakes. Risotto had done this sort of job himself. A unit in Genoa had been embezzling money and he’d been tasked with their deaths. The procedure was a tight one that had to be handled strictly.

 Stranger yet was the mercy and even compliance they’d been shown. Those who met with Risotto and his men and allowed them to live were signing their own death warrants. It was all too uncanny.

 “We’re going to need to move as soon as we can.” Prosciutto gnawed on the unlit cigarette in his mouth. “There are too many enemies here. They could be planning their next attack right now. They could already be at our doorstep.”

 “If they’re here I haven’t seen them.” Illuso commented. He’d been using the mirror world to keep tabs on the entire building. The homunculus that Melone had created earlier had yet to be destroyed or dispelled. For the time being, he’d left it to continue his scouting inside the mirror. It seemed to be one of the more compliant creatures made using Baby Face, but Illuso knew to be wary of its free will - Especially considering an old sample of Formaggio’s blood had been used to create it.

 “No, we’re going to stay where we are.” Risotto’s words carried his resolve. It was clear that he had already made his decision, but the idea still put his squad on edge.

 “Mind giving us an explanation?” Prosciutto challenged. “That doesn’t really sound like the best course of action when we’ve got Passione hot on our tails.”

 “I’m not totally convinced of who our enemy is.” Risotto responded. “Parts of what happened today seem more coincidence than plan.” As their Capo spoke, Trish appeared in the doorway. The gathering of ex-mafioso discouraged her from entering - listening from here would be just fine. “The one’s that we know were looking to kill us have already been taken care of.” Risotto’s eyes fell onto Trish as he spoke. By now the other’s had already been made aware of their alliance. How things would play out from here was a mystery.

 “We may not know for a fact that the other group’s goal was to wipe us out, but they could still come for us at any moment.” Prosciutto stressed.

 “Then let them come.” Risotto said his piece with utter confidence. “They only damaged us before because we were spread out. If they want to attack us all at once, we’ll let them walk into that massacre.”

[mintflavoredwindows]

A Really Long “Shinon/Gatrie Is at Least a Little Real and I Really Like It” Meta Post Thing

I just wanna talk about my Big Tellius Ship that I have trouble finding content for lmao, sorry to anyone who's seeing this post on mobile.  I got carried away!!!

So Shinon and Gatrie.  In PoR they get introduced together, they first leave the party together, they have a Really Good support, and just generally they have a lot of good interactions and are really tight.  I also have a hard time finding shippy content for them, I'm not 100% sure why??  There's some good shit out there for them but it feels like they would be more popular?  I mean, it's not like I don't have my own fic in the works for them, but I'm a lot better at just talkin shit like this than doing Serious Writing so this is gonna be Publishable WAY earlier, despite being way longer.

I was originally gonna go through a bunch of their interactions (especially their PoR supports) through the lens of Someone Who Ships Them and talk about why I like their dynamic and I think they work romantically, but this kinda turned into... a HUGE fuckin meta about both of them as characters and how they relate to each other + other characters.  I mean, it's hard to do the ship talk without the character talk.  I haven't actually played RD yet and I only know a few things about Shinon and Gatrie in that game, so if there's anything big to talk about there, I'm probably gonna miss it!  Thankfully, there's A Lot just in their PoR stuff.

So starting with their introduction at the end of Chapter 2, we're off to A Start. Shinon gets a really cool entrance where he fires some ridiculous shot and saves Rolf's life and then brags about it and demands that people thank him for it (spoiler: They don't), while Gatrie just kinda... barely arrives while sweating his ass off, complains that Titania and Shinon almost left him behind when they KNOW his armor is MASSIVE and impossible to run in (everyone ignores him), and claims that his running and sweating qualifies as hard work.  Now that I'm looking back at it, these are actually really effective introductions to their characters: Shinon as a guy who's real fuckin good at what he does but is a Raging Douche, and Gatrie as a generally good guy who gets memed on a bit and you feel bad for him buuut at the same time, he... manages to come across as a little bit of a tool too, even if he seems more pleasant than Shinon does.

We haven't even seen him try to flirt yet.

So in their first appearance, Shinon and Gatrie don't really interact with each other, you don't really directly get the sense that they're friends beyond the fact that they're introduced at the same time.  Actually, everyone just kind of ignores both of them??  Really in hindsight, I don't blame Shinon for feeling kinda underappreciated.  It's not until Chapter 3 that we find out that they work jobs together a lot, often enough that they have a name for their teamed fighting style:

Gatrie: “Ho, Deputy Commander! You want standard thunder and lightning maneuvers here?”Ike: “Er…Thunder and lightning?” Gatrie: “Yeah! I crash into ’em like thunder, and Shinon rains arrows down on ’em like lightning!”

Or Gatrie does anyway.  No one else makes reference "thunder and lightning" ever (Titania just says the plan "sounds good") and honestly I can picture him coming up with that and thinking it sounds So Cool and trying to make it A Thing.

After the chapter is completed, we see that Shinon and Gatrie are either 1.) definitely closer to each other than they are to the other Greil Mercenaries and that they have some priorities in common or 2.) really close friends and that Titania at least is really aware of this.  I'm gonna start with the first one because that's the scenario most people are gonna get (it's a little early in the game to be losing units).

So after clearing the pirates out of town, the mayor thanks the Greil Mercenaries, but suggests that they could make better pay in other positions.  They're really competent for a bunch of rando mercenaries defending a town from rando pirates.  Titania gets a little defensive over it, but it prompts this conversation if Shinon and Gatrie are both alive:

Shinon: “Pah! Jobs like this barely make a dent in my incurable boredom! It’s like that old buzzard said, there’s better work out there. Something with a bit of challenge.” Titania: “Shinon!” Shinon: “I’m joking. J-O-K-ing.” Gatrie: “Come, Titania. Be honest. Don’t you find the work we do to be a bit…disheartening? Unglamorous?” Titania: “What? You too, Gatrie? What’s gotten into you?” Gatrie: “Please! Look, we’re not a band of money-hungry recruits. We’re professionals, and we’re very good at what we do. Shinon and I have discussed this at length. All of this mundane mercenary work is unworthy of us. We’re wasting our talents.” Titania: “I see. You’re telling me that you think Commander Greil is mismanaging us. Do I have that right?” Gatrie: “Whoa! Hold it right there! That’s not what I’m saying at all!” Ike: “What is it, Titania?” Titania: “What’s what?” Ike: “You seem so angry. It’s not like you.” Titania: “Hmph…” Gatrie: “Exactly! Ike’s got the right of it!” Titania: “It’s just that I…Look, we do good work, and we help people. I want you to be proud of that. I felt like you were saying work that doesn’t bring fame and fortune isn’t worth doing, that’s all. Sorry.” Gatrie: “No…you’re right. We are the ones who ought to apologize.”

So there's a bit going on here.  This is obvious foreshadowing for Shinon and Gatrie being the ones who bail on the Greil Mercenaries after Greil's death to look for better work.  We also have Shinon starting some shit and Gatrie being the one to finish it, mostly by panicking at Titania's pushback and apologizing (not that Shinon doesn't do his own immediate backpedaling by brushing his comment off as a joke before Gatrie starts arguing on his behalf).  We can see that Shinon and Gatrie have similar priorities, ranking fame and fortune higher than the other Greil Mercenaries seem to, and Gatrie's mention of them discussing the subject at length (which Titania doesn't seem to have been aware of) makes it seem like they're definitely closer to each other than they are with the rest of the company.  I'd say that this exchange, plus the thunder and lightning thing, are really what establish Shinon and Gatrie as sort of a unit within the Greil Mercenaries.  After apologizing for stepping out of line, Gatrie is perfectly willing to concede the point to Titania and move on to a celebratory meal.  Shinon, on the other hand...

Shinon: “Pah. I’m surrounded by idealistic fools. What’s so wrong with fame? What’s wrong with having money to live well?”

He doesn't actually apologize for his "joke" and was, as it turns out, a little more serious about what he was saying than Gatrie was. Also, for all that somebody has Provoke as a default skill and is known to be foul-tempered and ready to fight, somebody sure does back down quickly when he's mildly rebuked/challenged!  Especially considering he wasn't joking at all!  There's probably another meta out there that interprets this as evidence that Shinon has a romantic thing for Titania and like, Okay Fair Enough, but that's not what this meta is, so I'm just gonna say it indicates that Shinon does care about Titania's opinion/Titania in general (as most of their few interactions do; they def respect each other and like each other as people) and that when he seriously steps on someone's toes who he really does care about, he's pretty quick to try to patch things up or change the subject.  Effective?  Maybe not so much. Anyway, Shinon and Gatrie are more in sync with each other than they are with the rest of the squad, but they're def not totally in sync!! (Which is good tbh, the world couldn't take more than one Shinon or more than one Gatrie I think)  This is reflected further down the line when Gatrie returns as an Other Unit before being re-recruited and expresses regret over abandoning his old company so quickly if Ike talks to him after he's back, while Shinon shows up as a straight-up enemy who taunts most of his old companions in battle conversations and needs to be defeated under really specific circumstances in order to not go down fighting, and even then, he demands that Ike duel him for leadership of the Greil Mercenaries if he's gonna come back to the company. But I'm getting ahead of myself, I gotta talk about the Sad Versions of this chapter end:

Shinon: “Hey, Captain. I’m gonna take off for a while.” Titania: “That’s no problem. We have nothing scheduled until tomorrow afternoon. Take what time you need.” Shinon: “Yeah. I’ll do that.” Ike: “Where’s Shinon going?” Titania: “He needs some time alone. Usually, I make everyone report in, but…with what happened to Gatrie today…” Ike: “I see.” Titania: “No matter how many times it happens, you never get used to losing a friend. Ike, this is…This is the world we mercenaries live in. Never lose sight of that one, cold truth.”

Gatrie: “Titania? I’d…um…like to take off for a while. Is that a problem?” Titania: “No. No problem. There’s nothing scheduled until tomorrow afternoon. Take your time.” Gatrie: “Thanks.” Ike: “Where’s Gatrie going?” Titania: “He needs some time alone. Usually, I make everyone report in, but…with what happened to Shinon…” Ike: “I see.” Titania: “No matter how many times it happens, you never get used to losing a friend. Ike, this is…this is the world we mercenaries live in. Never lose sight of that one, cold truth.”

Okay, so it admittedly doesn't take much to make me upset but this Makes Me Upset.  Shinon and Gatrie are close enough that if one dies, the other feels that they need to request some time off to grieve... and Titania recognizes that they def need it.  Shinon does this kind of posturing where he basically tells Titania he's taking the time off whether it's okay or not, but her convo with Ike makes it obvious that she sees through it.  He's actually pretty distraught about losing Gatrie?  Gatrie, as usual, is a little more upfront about his actual emotional state (the "um" kills me fsr??) and seems pretty subdued compared to most of his other dialogue.  Still, he doesn't actually have to say what's up for it to be obvious (to Titania, who definitely knows both of them better than Ike does) that he's broken up about Shinon dying.  Even though these conversations p much signal the end of any Shinon-Gatrie interactions for the playthrough they show up in, they make it obvious that they're really close friends who definitely care about each other on a level beyond "guy whose priorities are kinda similar to mine and we chill sometimes."  This also establishes that even though Gatrie is definitely more open with his feelings than Shinon is, neither of them is really... good with discussing deep stuff. Granted, it's hard to get deeper/harder to talk about than coping with the death of someone you really care about, but it's an indication that either of them might gloss over what they're really feeling when things get emotionally dicey.

There's not a whole lot to comment on in Chapter 4, but after pulling Shinon to be part of Ike's squad, Greil immediately picks Gatrie too.  I'm gonna quote it, not really because it's significant to anything, but just because I love it when Shinon gets memed on like this:

Shinon: “Commander, you must be joking! He’s just a boy, and he’s had barely more than a taste of battle. What do you expect a whelp like him to accomplish?” Greil: “Ah, Shinon. Since you’re so concerned, you can go as well.” Shinon: “Wait, that’s not what I… Blast.” Greil: “Who else…Gatrie, Rhys, and Soren. That should do.”

Shinon really really hates having Ike in charge of anything, huh.  Granted, if I kept getting passed over for recognition and stuff for a 17-year-old, I'd probably be pretty miffed too??

Another note, I'm probably gonna get on Gatrie's case for being sort of oblivious later on, but he's not totally unobservant.  He's the default character to notice Daein troops approaching in this chapter if all units are still alive.  He's also the one who notices the affilation of the dead soldiers if Rhys isn't around to  do it:

Titania: “Are they Crimean?” Gatrie: “I don’t think so. Look at that black armor, Ike. The vast majority of the dead are Daein soldiers.”

After the battle, he's also the only one who's paying attention to what Shinon's up to.

Gatrie: “I don’t know…Taking out these Daein soldiers may have been a bad move. Um…Hey, Shinon? What are you doing?” Shinon: “This swine’s got some nice weapons. Besides, he ain’t gonna complain. He won’t need them where he’s going.”

Shinon's a catch, huh.  Also, he calls Soren judgmental when he tells to him to "steal from the dead on [his] own time."  Yeah, Shinon, that's definitely being judgmental.

Moving on to Chapter 5, Shinon and Gatrie come down on different sides of the Elincia debate... kind of:

Greil: “Shinon? Gatrie?” Shinon: “Soren’s a pompous, superior whelp, but he’s got the right idea. Besides, the destination’s Gallia, so it’s a moot question. I don’t care how much we get paid; there’s no way under the sun I’m going to stinking beast country.” Gatrie: “Princess Elincia…She does possess a certain regal beauty… There’s a lot to be said for that, you know. However I do prefer country girls…A bit cuter, and not quite so standoffish…Oh! Forget I said that.Whatever you decide is good for me, Commander. Yep, uh-huh, yep…”

Again, they end up paired together when Greil asks for their opinions.  They really are kind of a unit within the group? Also, I'm surprised it's even this deep into the game before we get our first reference to Gatrie being kind of a womanizer, considering that becomes his Primary Character Quirk.  I'll talk more about how Gatrie flirts (It's Bad) and how I think that plays out in his relationship with Shinon later when I talk about their support conversations. For now, I'll say that Gatrie just... says whatever he's thinking sometimes, huh. Like he seems to know that the stuff he's saying is irrelevant to the issue at hand and also that it's stuff that the others probably aren't particularly interested in hearing, but he just... keeps on goin.  I will admit that "cute" and "not quite so standoffish" aren't really things I'd describe Shinon as, but Shinon is definitely less standoffish with people he's close to.  He's not particular nice in this scene, but Gatrie really really does not seem to mind:

Greil: “Open your ears and listen. Listen! All of you.” Boyd:“Huh?…What is it?” Gatrie: “Uh…I don’t hear a thing…” Shinon: “Idiot! That’s the problem. Don’t you think that’s a bit odd? Complete silence, in all four directions.” Gatrie: “Oh, so that’s what you’re talking about!”

Really, Gatrie seems to have no problem brushing it off most of the time when Shinon's being p damn harsh.  I'd argue that Shinon doesn't really mean the vast majority of the rude shit he says, especially jumping all the way to his PoR epilogue dialogue, after the war is over and everything is said and done:

Shinon: “…Bah. I suppose you want some kind of congratulations now, right? Well, too bad. You’re a snot-nosed whelp, and I’m still better than you. Don’t ever forget that.”

Awww, how sweet.  Seriously though, he's smiling when he says this and it's in the middle of a whole bunch of people congratulating Ike on ending a fucking war and affirming how much he means to them.  There is absolutely no way in hell he actually means this, he just can't bring himself to tell Ike that he did a good job.  He's too caught up in his fucking jackass persona to have a nice moment with anyone who isn't Rolf or Gatrie, as we'll get to, and even there he has some trouble.

At the end of the chapter, Shinon and Gatrie get paired together on another mission:

Greil: “Titania! Take Shinon and Gatrie and make sure we have a secure road from here to the great forest. We’ll make our way to Gallia through the sea of trees.”

Ditto with the intro to the next chapter:

Greil: “All right, let’s split up. The diversionary team will be Gatrie, Shinon, and me. The rest of you guard Princess Elincia and proceed to Gallia straightaway. Got it?” Ike: “Are you sure you’re taking enough men?” Shinon: “Idiot pup. Smaller numbers mean better mobility. Your time would be better spent worrying about yourself than about us.” Ike: “…”

Greil has Shinon and Gatrie working together A LOT near the beginning of the game.  I'm not skipping over anything where they get sent on different assignments??  They do work well together combat-wise (in theory, at least, because in my experience, enemies CONSTANTLY ignore Gatrie and his good good Def stat in favor of mobbing Shinon who can't take it as well because he has Provoke on him and I can't bring myself to take it off) and they're good at dealing with each other's personalities and quirks, but holy shit Greil Does Not Separate Them.  We even see some more of this in Rhys and Titania's C-support a little later on, which also gives us another example of how Shinon tries really really hard to pretend like he doesn't care about anyone when that is def not the case:

Titania: "Yeah, those bandits were a rough lot... Their stomping ground was right near your village, actually. It's all coming back to me now... They were tougher than I'd thought. We took most of them out with ease, but one fled into the woods and I gave chase. Big mistake. My horse got hung up in the undergrowth, and that bandit got the drop on me... At least Shinon hit him before I was killed." Rhys: "Gatrie and Shinon were both really worried when they brought you back to my parents' house." Titania: "Really? I didn't know that. Hmm... I didn't think Shinon ever worried about anyone... But they stayed with me until my wounds were healed, I remember that.”

Before splitting off from the group though, Shinon arguably calls Gatrie delicate (in a sympathetic way):

Gatrie: “Blazes, why does it have to be so blamed humid? If we weren’t being chased, I’d strip off this armor here and now!” Titania: “Then I’m almost glad that we ARE being pursued. I suppose you’ll have to grin and bear it, won’t you?” Gatrie: “Hm, I suppose I will.” Titania: “Right. So enough of your griping. You’re merely wasting energy. Still, this heat is appalling.” Shinon: “Dense forests such as these are not made for us delicate humans. The sub-humans love ’em, though.”

Granted, EVERYONE is complaining about the humidity (sidenote, I love Titania and I love her comeback to Gatrie saying he wants to Disrobe, it's iconic), but it does come across as Shinon backing Gatrie up on this one.

When Greil's party meets up with Ike's, Shinon and Gatrie have a little lore convo and then immediately get sent off on another assignment together:

Gatrie: “Shinon… What are these 'twisted games' the boss is talking about?” Shinon: “There’s rumor that King Daein gathers strong men from around the continent and sets them to fight one another. Those who live, regardless of their birth, are given influential positions. Don’t know if it’s true, though.” Gatrie: “Oh…So that weird dame’s got her eye on the boss now, does she?” Greil: “Shinon! Gatrie! I’ll distract the woman. You two grab Ike and the others and get out of here now!” Shinon: “Got it!” Gatrie: “But, Commander! We can’t leave you here on your own!” Shinon: “Idiot! That woman’s no threat to the commander. All right, come on! Let’s go!”

Gatrie's phrasing re: Petrine is so surreal to me... "That weird dame"... "Got her eye on the boss"... Like Shinon just told him about this fucked-up-if-true thing and it almost sounds like all he got out of it is that Petrine is like... interested in Greil??  Like I definitely think he's bi, but heteronormativity is one hell of a thing, especially where Gatrie's concerned.

Reuniting with Ike, Gatrie is happy to see him and gets emotional, while Shinon is... Shinon interacting with Ike.

Ike: “Gatrie!” Gatrie: “Hey, is that you, Ike? I heard you got the princess to Gallia. Nice work! You’re quite the hero. …But wait! So what in blazes are you doing back here?” Ike: “You’ll think it foolish, but I was worried about all of you.” Gatrie: “Aww…You’re going to make me cry, you silly pup! All right…sniff… Get it together, Gatrie. Tonight, you and I will share a meal sing a song or two!”

Ike: “Well met, Shinon. Are you unharmed?” Shinon: “Do I look injured? I’m as fit as ever. You must be disappointed Daein hasn’t stuck me full of holes yet.” Ike: “…” Shinon: “Guess it’s time to tighten our belts and move on. Now that I’m gonna be dragging your worthless carcass around again, I'll have to work twice as hard.”

"..." is about right, Ike. Shinon is really REALLY sure that the dislike is totally mutual (or wants it to be fsr?) when it really, really isn't.  Like, the whole rivalry thing between them is super one-sided.  Gatrie, on the other hand, doesn't have that weird animosity going on with Ike, so he's just touched that Ike cares. He even cries a lil bit.

The reunion doesn't last long though.  After this chapter, Greil is killed by the Black Knight and Shinon and Gatrie leave the company.  Together, incidentally.

Soren: “Shinon and Gatrie have left us.” Boyd: “Soren!” Soren: “What? There’s nothing to hide, is there?” Ike: “They left? Both of them? Why did they–Oh, I see. They left because of me, didn’t they?" Titania: “Ike…” Boyd: “Titania told us you were going to be the new commander. Shinon just about exploded…He and Gatrie left not long ago.” Oscar: “We went after them. We tried to talk things out, but it was a waste of time.”

Incidentally, Gatrie makes the decision to leave independently if Shinon is dead at this point because he doesn't want to serve under anyone other than Greil. But as long as Shinon's alive, his issues with Ike take center stage for this conversation.  They apparently stick together long enough that the rest of the group seems to talk to them both?  Eventually they go their separate ways though, with Gatrie finding a job as Astrid's bodyguard and Shinon enlisting in the Daein army.  I'm really curious at what point they split up tbh?  It's never really addressed and Gatrie's surprised to see Shinon fighting with Daein later on, so they pretty much definitely parted ways before that.  It's possible that it really wasn't long after this, although I like to think they stuck together for at least a little while.  This is getting into headcanon territory, but I think that Gatrie probably got pretty emotional when they were saying their goodbyes but probably bounced back pretty quickly afterward.  Shinon seems to me like he'd pretend it didn't really affect him at all, but other than possibly Rolf, Gatrie's definitely the one he's closest to in the Greil Mercenaries (and probably beyond that even?), so he's def feeling something.  He tries to brush off his emotional reactions when it comes to his work though, as we'll see a little later, and he usually tries to convince others to do the same.

We don't see either of them again until Ike's squad just happens to run into Gatrie on his new job in Chapter 13.  He's pretty damn flirty with Astrid and has a whole support of him trying to impress her, but please Astrid, you can do better.

Gatrie: "Lady Astrid! Allow me to serve as your shield!" Astrid: "Gatrie...I'm so sorry that I've gotten you involved in this, too..." Gatrie: "Oh, please! This is nothing. I'm fine!! Before I was hired as your bodyguard, I was a top-notch mercenary! I can handle this many opponents all by myself. This is nothing." Astrid: "Is that so? Your confidence is impressive, to say the least..." Gatrie: "Tee hee! Well...trust me, my confidence is backed with my blade! I'm ready to fight!"

As most of the other Greil Mercenaries note, Gatrie is thrilled to be working for a cute girl and really wants to impress her.  He also giggles a lot when that comes up, which is another thing I'm surprised hasn't come up before now? He's a giggler.

Titania: "My...I've never seen you so serious before. Whoever your new employer is, he must be quite special...or...would I be safe in saying 'she'?" Gatrie: "Tee hee! You know me too well! But I do love the work she gives me. I'm so happy, I don't know what to do! Well, it is nice seeing you again!"

Gatrie also gets a quick base conversation with Ike in the next chapter, where he tries to get Ike to join him in Some Straight Dude Bullshit and fails miserably:

Gatrie: "No, I'm here for different reasons. I'm just...admiring the flowers." Ike: "Oh, right. Yes, they all seem to be in bloom this time of year. The large yellow ones are especially pretty." Gatrie: "Not those flowers...THOSE flowers!" Ike: "...Gatrie, we're inside. There's nothing here but the temple handmaidens." Gatrie: "Exactly! It's like a whole new species of girl lives in Begnion! Everyone in this palace is drop-dead gorgeous!" Ike: "..." Gatrie: "You know what I mean, Ike? Tee hee! Say, which one strikes your fancy? That buxom lass with the chestnut hair is... Hey, Ike? Ike? Bah! He's still just a boy!"

First off, there is absolutely no way in hell Ike is a heterosexual.  Also I'm so sure that this wasn't intentional, especially since the rest of the conversation is focused on girls, but Gatrie does say that everyone in the palace is drop-dead gorgeous, which I didn't notice until now and I think I'm just gonna... call Death of the Author on this one, Gatrie is mega impressed by the dudes too.

Another thing to talk about here is Gatrie phrasing something weirdly (again) with the "whole new species of girl" thing.  Gatrie... What the fuck.  Honestly, I was gonna try to analyze that line but all I can come up with is "What the fuck, Gatrie" so I'm just gonna let it serve as a segueway to talking about Gatrie's non-Shinon support conversations and how he approaches relationships with women and how it's... honestly not great.  Like I think he's well-intentioned with all of it?  Like he wants to be romantic and do nice things, but he's suuuper forward with the flirting and gets kind of pedestal-y from time to time.  Eugh, fair warning, some of this stuff gets kind of uncomfortable:

Gatrie: "Marcia! How are you doing, beautiful?" Marcia: "Huh? How do you know my name?" Gatrie: "Why wouldn't I know the name of a cute girl like you?! You know, there was a time when Titania was the only woman in this mercenary group. Things have really started to shape up while I was away. Mmm... Not bad at all." Marcia: "Oh, nice line, chump. I'm swooning."

You tell him, Marcia.

Gatrie: "Ilyana!" Ilyana: "Oh, hello..." Gatrie: "I picked these beautiful flowers just for you!" Ilyana: "Oh..." Gatrie: "W-what? You don't like them?" Ilyana: "Well..." Gatrie: "Oh, good! So you DO like them!" Ilyana: "It's just that... Um..." Gatrie: "...No good, eh? Then what about this broach? Isn't it fashionable? I picked it up at a quaint little curio shop I stumbled upon." Ilyana: "Oh..."

You've barely talked to her Gatrie, slow down.

Gatrie: "That's nice of you to say, but having someone as gorgeous and talented as you join us is payment enough. I need nothing more!" Marcia: "Whoa...that's a lot of pressure. I had no idea people depended on me so much. In any case, I'll keep doing my best! Wish me luck!" Gatrie: "She's so adorable! She will be mine... Oh, yes. She...will...be...mine."

Gatrie, please chill out just a little.  On that note, Gatrie does tend to push boundaries farther than anyone really should when he's trying to flirt.

Gatrie: "That's no good, either? Are you sure you won't take it?" Ilyana: "Well... It's nice, but..." Gatrie: "... Oh! So you love it, right? Just like you love big, strong knights?" Ilyana: "Excuse me..." Gatrie: "Hmmm. She's a tough one to swoon. I'll just have to pour it on even thicker! There's no way I'm going to let such a gorgeous girl slip away!"

He does quit eventually though, even though all of his PoR supports with girls end with him deciding not to give up.  He's not total garbage when it comes to boundaries, just somewhat.

Gatrie: "Not interested, are you?" Ilyana: "It's not that--" Gatrie: "You don't want it, do you?" Ilyana: "Not really..." Gatrie: "Hmm, this tactic isn't working. To be honest, I was thinking that if I gave you something you liked, you might come out to dinner with me sometime."

Astrid: "I don't have a boyfriend. But... I do have a fiance." Gatrie: "What?! A fiance?!" Astrid: "Yes." Gatrie: "Well, er... Congratulations!" Astrid: "Gatrie! Do you have something in your eye?" Gatrie: "Oh... Don't worry about me. ...Sniff... Sniff... As long as you're happy... ...Sniiiifff..." Astrid: "Gatrie! Where are you going?" Gatrie: "I screwed up again! I thought I had a chance this time, too. Hmmm... Wait... She said she had a fiance, didn't she? Going out of her way to tell me that... She must want me to swoon her off her feet and steal her away! That's it! She should have just said so! Wait for me, Astrid!"

And thus the cycle continues.  I mean, Astrid literally ran away from home and needed to hire a bodyguard because she wanted to get away from Lekain so badly (as would most people), so it's not like Gatrie was completely misreading the mood there.  But he doesn't want to disrupt a hypothetical happy relationship and, in his support with Ilyana, he eventually gets the hint and I really don't think I'm overromanticizing him by saying that if he hadn't mentioned dinner and Ilyana hadn't jumped on that free food opportunity, he would have excused himself and had a good cry and that would have been the end of it.

Another thing about Gatrie's flirting attempts is that he tries really, really hard to seem cool.  He does a little bit of this with everyone, like when he arrives as a reinforcement in Chapter 17:

Gatrie: "...Puff... Puff... Whew!  There you are!  Hold on, everyone!  Your knight in shining armor has arrived!"

Man, he just keeps sweatin in that armor, huh.  He lays it on super thick when he's flirting though.

Gatrie: "I'm Gatrie. But I'm sure you already knew that." Ilyana: "Um...well, actually..." Gatrie: "Of course, I'm sure you've heard all about my victories on the battlefield. Oh, there was that business with the dragon..."

Gatrie: "Marcia! Good to see you. Actually, I was just about to meet up with Ike for a little sparring session." Marcia: "W-what!? You're going to fight the commander?!" Gatrie: "You bet I am! That's why I asked you to stop by. I wanted to invite you along so you could check me out in action. Now, don't get my wrong... Ike is a strong commander. But he doesn't have a chance to match my overwhelming physical power! It's breathtaking, really." Marcia: "Breathtaking? Really... I can't wait to see this, Gatrie." Gatrie: "Ha ha ha! Well, what can I say? Why don't you just kick back and watch me unleash the raw fury of these mighty arms! Hhhrraaaawwww!"

Gatrie: "Oh, I get it! That's very admirable, Astrid! Er... But now isn't the best time for that. I'm a little sore from... uh...lifting heavy things... Blast! Where's Titania when you need her? I don't know the first thing about training people..." Astrid: "Sorry? I didn't catch that." Gatrie: "Ha ha! No, nothing at all! Let's train some other day! I want to make sure I'm totally prepared!"

"Lifting heavy things."  Right.  He also gets pretty damn upset when he completely fails to look cool in front of someone he's interested in, as best shown in his supports with Marcia:

Marcia: "What's the matter, big fella? You're looking down." Gatrie: "It's better if you don't talk to me at all, Marcia. Don't even give me a second look. I'm nothing but dirt. I'm worse than dirt... I'm...sludge!" Marcia: "Oh, boy... This is about the other day, isn't it? When you got beaten down by--" Gatrie: "Don't remind me! I was such a fool! I can't believe I let you see me get smacked around like that. I might as well throw in the towel now. I'm just a big loser..."

So in summary, Gatrie tries to impress people by faking being cooler and tougher than he is and aiming for Big Romantic Gestures, usually without checking to see if they'd be appreciated first.  Like I said, I think he's well-intentioned and genuinely wants to pursue these relationships??  But he's a goddamn mess.  I'm about to blow your mind though with something I found out by combing through the RD support lines:

Shinon's even worse at flirting.

Shinon doesn't flirt nearly as often??  There is literally one totally unambiguous example of Shinon flirting with someone and... It Sure Is A Thing.

Shinon: "You know, I try to stay out of relationships. And I’m not saying I want a relationship. But, Princess Leanne, I do hope you live."

I hope somebody read that and is haunted by it for as long as I've been.  He's like?? negging her???  He's literally negging her, he's negging Leanne of all people, I don't know how else to describe it.  Most of the A-supports in RD take on some vaguely romantic undertones (Leanne herself basically proposes to anyone she has an A-support with-- Leanne is canon bi, u heard it here folks), so naturally most of Shinon's have him saying that it's not like he gets attached to other soldiers, he doesn't have friends or anything, by the way Apostle Sanaki, his mom never hugged him, you know.  No, really, that line is real and Sanaki-exclusive:

Shinon: "You know, I’m not very sentimental. My mother never hugged me. Anyway… Apostle Sanaki, you’re kinda key. You should live. I hope we both make it ’til the bitter end!"

Just a few other highlights of Shinon making an ass out of himself:

Shinon: "You know, I never thought I’d say this, but… King Naesala, I’m thinkin’ you should live. Don’t ask me why! Just a crazy notion. Maybe I like you?"

Shinon: "You know, I’m not one for making friends and being nice. But, Caineghis, I gotta say, you are one bad laguz. In a good way! Hang in there."

Of course, if Shinon is responding to someone else's encouragements to stay alive or declaration of some form of affection, he's still a massive tool about it:

Shinon: "Don’t try to tie me down with that. But I’ll think about it. Maybe."

ANYWAY, Shinon is BAD at letting people know they matter to him and is just as bad at responding to people letting him know that he matters to them!  Like, he's obviously attached to Gatrie and Rolf even if he doesn't care for most of the Greil Mercenaries, Gatrie at least is very obviously his friend, as is whoever he gets an A-support in RD with. It really seems like he just isn't really sure how to... say that. We also see a little bit of him having trouble processing other people caring about him in PoR support with Rolf too:

Rolf: "The first time I went into battle, my feet were shaking because I was so scared. But then I held the bow that you made for me, and it gave me strength. And I said, 'Rolf! You can do this!' I learned absolutely everything from you! That's how I've stayed alive this whole time." Shinon: "...But why on earth... Why would you depend on me like that? I mean, I just I taught you how to fire the bow on a whim."

Just a quick note on Gatrie's RD supports before I move on: Because all of the support dialogue is generic fill-in-the-name, it's really tough to figure out who's being talked to unless they have a unique title, so I can't say for sure what Shinon and Gatrie's supports look like or who Gatrie's supposed to be talking to at all in most of his.  I don't??? see a clear gender distinction with his more generic lines??  Like he has a few variations that don't involve calling someone a king or Apostle, but they pretty much all follow  the same pattern of acting like he had no idea the other person would be there, What A Coincidence, for the C-support, showboating a bit and telling them that he'll protect them (so long as they're okay with that) for the B-support, and saying that he'd never let anything happen to them If They Could Please Survive for the A-support.  No clear romantic cues in any of them, which is a little strange given his continuing characterization as a Big Flirt With The Ladies.  Arguably he's sorta flirting with everyone, since, like I said, a lot of the RD supports come across as romantic??  He's just finally being low-key about it for once.

When Shinon finally comes back as an enemy in PoR, he doesn't give a shit that he used to work with the Greil Mercenaries, he'll fight em no problem... or so he says.  The more I look at his dialogue for this chapter, the more I think that he was really hoping it wouldn't happen.  He gives some of them pep talks, tries to write the whole thing off as business, but he also encourages some of them to just... avoid him?  Like he'll still attack them after the conversation, but he clearly doesn't want to.  Some examples:

Rhys: "Shinon!" Shinon: "...Oh, Rhys. Great. I can't believe I've run into you." Rhys: "It is great, isn't it? Oh, it's good to have you back. When you left us, I was really worried about what would happen, but--" Shinon: "Hey, Rhys? Shut up. In case you hadn't noticed...we're enemies out here." Rhys: "What? You can't... You're not serious, are you?" Shinon: "You honestly never thought this could happen? You're beyond good natured. You're a fool." Rhys: "Shinon... What are you saying? You've always been gruff, but...Are you serious?" Shinon: "It's not like this is the first time I've called you out. You've never considered that people may not like you, have you? Know what? We were companions once, but if I'm getting paid, I'll gladly put an arrow through your eye." Rhys: "Shinon... Is there something you can't tell us that's forcing you to do this? Are you protecting someone? Has someone you love been taken hostage? If so, we could--" Shinon: "No! There's nothing! Nothing but the right price, at least... You're overestimating me. Get going, pretty boy. Stick around any longer, and I'll start earning my pay with you!"

Mist: "Shi-Shinon? Ohmigosh...Why are you with the Daein army?!" Shinon: "...Tsk. None of your business, kid." Mist: "But that's... Oh, what should I do? You used to be one of us. I can't fight you!" Shinon: "Stop whining. Didn't you ever think what it means to be a mercenary? We're enemies, kid. Get it? I'm ready to fight when you are. So what's it going to be?" Mist: "...Um..." Shinon: "...Yeah?" Mist: "No! I won't fight you!" Shinon: "Gah! What ARE you going to do then?" Mist: "Come back to the Greil Mercenaries!" Shinon: "What?" Mist: "If you won't do that, then come work for the Crimean army! Please?" Shinon: "Don't be stupid. Either way, Ike's in charge, right?" Mist: "Yes, but I don't--" Shinon: "I won't work for him. Get it? We used to be friends, so I'm going to let you go. Now get your naive little butt out of here!" Mist: "Shinon... Sniff...sniff...Wh-wh-why...? Sniff... Whaaaaaaaaa!" Shinon: "Crying's not going to help. Look, it doesn't matter who you send to talk to me. My answer's the same." Mist: "Even Rolf?" Shinon: "...Yeah. Even Rolf. Get out of here. The next time I see you, I'll stick an arrow in you. Count on it."

Boyd: "Shinon! I couldn’t care less who you decide to work for… Heck, I’d hoped you were dead! But even so, Daein? You couldn’t find anything better than this? What were you thinking?" Shinon: "Haven’t changed a bit, have you? You’re still a mouthy piece of work. Listen up! Daein’s a great place to work right now. The pay’s great, and strength at arms is the only thing that determines class standing. You want to join me?"

Of course, you could definitely argue that Shinon knows that there's no way Boyd will take him up on that offer (he's more or less civil with Oscar but I can't imagine Shinon actually cares about Boyd, given his feelings toward Ike and Soren and how Boyd is also an Annoying Teen), but it's still an out to this fight that doesn't involve Shinon surrendering.  He also basically just tells Mist to steer clear of him instead of fighting her initially and asbolutely does not seem happy to see Rhys and I don't think that's just because Rhys is too much of an angel for Shinon to stomach (although it's that too).  Like instead of starting the fight, he just tells him to scram.  Also I love how Rhys jumps to the conclusion that Daein is holding one of Shinon's loved ones hostage and that's why he's working with them.  Pretty sure that the details of Shinon's personal life are just a mystery to everyone else??  I also love that Shinon calls Rhys "pretty boy" in this conversation, but I don't think there's a whole lot to glean from that.  Of course, Shinon also has some dialogue with Gatrie in this chapter:

Gatrie: "Shi-Shinon? SHINON?! Oh, this can’t be happening! I mean, fighting you… That’s going to be tough." Shinon: "Come on, Gatrie. You can’t be worried about me forever. You’re a mercenary. All you need to do is worry about your own skin. You got it?" Gatrie: "Well, yeah… Heh heh heh… Ahh… Still…this will be a sad day…"

God...  So clearly, Gatrie doesn't want to go through with this, but Shinon gives him a little pep talk that covers roughly the same ground as his conversations with Rolf on this stage.  Gatrie does seem to try to cover up how surprised and upset he is, although it doesn't work too well imo.  Also there's the implication that Gatrie worries about Shinon on a semi-regular basis?  It's not really reflected anywhere else but I'm glad he apparently does because Shinon could probably use someone worrying about him lmao.  Again, Shinon tries to play it off like he doesn't care that he's fighting his old comrades, but honestly I get the vibe that his pep talks to Gatrie and Rolf are self-talk almost as much as he's trying to get them to be okay fighting him.  It's just... a mess tbh.

Once the stage is over, Shinon is FINALLY back and ready for support conversations.  Can u believe that I was pretty much just going to talk about Shinon and Gatrie's support convos in this meta... I can't believe it took me like 7k words to get here, I am so sorry.  Anyway, the number of stages Shinon and Gatrie both need to be deployed in to unlock their C-support is pretty low and is p much automatically met before they leave the Greil Mercenaries.  So Shinon comes back and is immediately ready to start shooting the shit with Gatrie again. And right away, we start with the flirting tbh:

Shinon: "Whatever. See you around." Gatrie: "W-wait! I'm just joking! Stop being so mean and listen for a second!" Shinon: "I will if you buy dinner tonight." Gatrie: "Mmmm... Oh, all right. But you better give me good advice!"

Remember how Gatrie gave Ilyana like a million presents as a prelude to asking if he could buy her dinner?  He's just gotta talk to Shinon for like five seconds and there Shinon is, asking him to buy him dinner, and Gatrie's like "Okay sure."  Shinon's dialogue also suggests that the two of them eat dinner together by themselves pretty regularly. We also see that, even tho Shinon acts annoyed with Gatrie a lot of the time, the negative feedback he's giving here is... honestly pretty fair and probably legit intended to be helpful??:

Gatrie: "But every time I spend money, you give me a hard time!" Shinon: "I do? How?" Gatrie: "What about the other day, when I bought the Ultimate Shield?!" Shinon: "Gatrie, that was a castle gate. Hey, did you ever give that back? That guard thought you were a thief." Gatrie: "And remember the SpeedBring 4000? That secret elixir that boosts speed just by sprinkling it over your body--" Shinon: "You mean that putrid snake oil? You dumped the whole bottle on your head without smelling it first." Gatrie: "But that wonderful little potion worked! I DID move faster!" Shinon: "You moved faster because thirty stray dogs were chasing you."

WOW Gatrie's gullible.  Shinon is definitely a jackass but it really does seem like he's trying to look out for Gatrie on this front.  Maybe Shinon's line about Gatrie worrying about him was more self-talk?

Gatrie's not totally afraid to call Shinon out on his being a jackass though, which is good.  He also apologizes when he thinks he's actually made Shinon upset:

Gatrie: "See! You're giving me a hard time again!" Shinon: "Oh, did I hurt your feelings? Wow, it sure is fun to tell you the truth and have you grumble at me in return." Gatrie: "No, no! I didn't mean to... Er... Sorry..." Shinon: "Hmm... You're too honest sometimes..." Gatrie: "Hee hee! You're embarrassing me!" Shinon: "All right, let's go eat! Now that's spending wisely!" Gatrie: "Yeah, let's... Wait a minute, Shinon! You didn't help me at all! This isn't part of the deal!"

Okay, I have to take a second to roast Shinon for almost exactly saying "Did I hurt your precious feelings?"  Jfc, he's talking like some shitty anti-SJ blogger... Red and black blog theme... Logic and rationality are the arrows in his quiver... Pictures of anime titty girls... Welcome to his twisted mind...  Chill the fuck out, dude.  He's messing with Gatrie though and doesn't let it go on too long. Honestly, it feels like flirty teasing to me?  As has been established, Shinon is Extremely Bad at flirting.  And Gatrie reacts to this Possible Bad Flirting by... giggling and telling Shinon that he's embarrassing him.  Like that's just a gay line of dialogue and nothing about the context makes it less gay tbh.  Gatrie has been Flirted With and seems to be responding positively.  The rest of the support takes a step back from that, though, and focuses on Gatrie's efforts to Woo A Lady.

Gatrie: "I really want to ask you something. Right now!" Shinon: "No, Gatrie." Gatrie: "I'll pay for dinner again." Shinon: "Get lost." Gatrie: "We'll eat somewhere more expensive tonight." Shinon: "Appetizers?" Gatrie: "Sure! You can order anything you want!" Shinon: "All right, then. I think I can spare some time for my brother-in-arms." Gatrie: "Aw, thanks Shinon! I owe you one!"

A couple things here.  One, Gatrie obviously respects Shinon's opinion/advice even tho it's unnecessarily harsh.  Two, he's totally aware that the way to get Shinon to answer his question is to offer to take him somewhere nicer.  I mean, free food is a Powerful Motivator, but I'm so sure there's something else going on on Shinon's end here.  Three, Gatrie, you're buying him dinner...  I don't think you really owe him anything else.  Gatrie's sleazy as hell, but he somehow manages to be innocent and sweet at the same time, idk how he does it.

Gatrie has a hell of a time actually asking his question though.

Shinon: "...Well? What do you want?" Gatrie: "Well, actually... What I need to ask you is..." Shinon: "Spit it out!" Gatrie: "Well, it's... Oh, I don't know. Do you really want to hear it?" Shinon: "Do that one more time, and I'll put an arrow through your eye!" Gatrie: "W-wait! Just a minute! I'll tell you now... Are you ready?" Shinon: "Aaaaaarrrgh!" Gatrie: "Ihaveanewgirlfriend!!!!" Shinon: "A new girlfriend? Is she blind or something?"

Aaaand he immediately gets negged for his efforts.  Shinon is definitely not immediately happy that Gatrie's seeing someone and Gatrie seems to know that that's going to be the case.  I chalk this up to jealousy on Shinon's part and Gatrie having some dim awareness of how Shinon feels.  Shinon cleans his act up pretty quickly though, thank fuck.  Gatrie's his friend first and given how much time Gatrie spends flirting with ladies, I doubt Shinon thinks this is going anywhere anyway.

Shinon: "Well, I'm happy for you. Oh, I see. You want to ask me what kind of gift to give her, right?" Gatrie: "Tee hee hee! Yeah, that's right! What should I give her?" Shinon: "I know everything there is to know about gift giving, my friend. I'll tell you all about it over a fine meal." Gatrie: "Please do, romance master!"

Romance master. Wow.  So Gatrie thinks that Shinon is like... good at this stuff. I mean, it's totally possible that if Shinon finds himself in a relationship, he does romantic stuff and is actually good at it.  I can see that.  He'd keep a closely guarded secret though, I think, considering his idea of flirting seems to include telling someone that he's not interested in relationships in general and he's not looking for a relationship with THEM, he just doesn't want them to die. Like, my dude... wanting someone to not die doesn't even vaguely imply u wanna date or anything, like when I hear "I do you hope you live," my mind doesn't go anywhere near any type of attraction.  I doubt that Gatrie got his entire ""technique"" from Shinon though, since he's really heavy on the compliments and upfront about his intentions, which is basically the opposite of what Shinon does in practice.  Still, Gatrie seems to dig it!! Someone has to, I guess!!

Of course, this relationship doesn't pan out for Gatrie.  Actually, none of them do?  Skipping ahead to the semi-tragic ending, Shinon and Gatrie never get it together, and for all his efforts at wooing, Gatrie never gets it together with anyone:

Perpetual Guardian (護る盾, Mamoru tate, lit. Protective Shield) Gatrie became a famous mercenary and a household name. Fate led him to find many women but never true love.

Shinon doesn't either, although his RD epilogue reads a bit more sad to me?

Deadly Adept (百の手, Crack Shot in the Japanese version) Shinon lazes the days away in his old haunts. An expert at all he put his hand to, he chose none as his calling.

I mean, if he's content, he's content, and the driving force behind his ambition in PoR is being able to live comfortably, which it sounds like he's doing??  But, predictably I guess since the dude has a definite habit of pushing people away, Shinon's ending sounds p damn lonely.  The reference to "old haunts" especially makes me feel like this isn't really supposed to be a good ending for him?  Still, I do hope he's happy with how things worked out for him.  Anyway, on to their PoR A-support to end on a high note.

Gatrie: "..." Shinon: "What the...?" Gatrie: "..." Shinon: "Why are you standing out here like a scarecrow?" Gatrie: "Hey, Shinon. I'm just waiting for my girlfriend." Shinon: "Oh. Her. Right. You're still dating?"

For the record, Shinon is smiling for that last line, so it's not SO blatantly him being jealous of Nameless Girl like I first thought it was when I was just reading the text.  He ends up being the one to hear out Gatrie's story about how he got engaged to her and then gave her all of his money but she's late to their meeting tonight.  So he also ends up being the one to express concern that Gatrie rushed this relationship and the one to break the news that she conned him.

Gatrie: "She knows I'm with this army, and... And..." Shinon: "Gatrie? She's not coming. You've been conned." Gatrie: "Whaaat!? No, I don't believe it! She's such a fine girl! So pure and kind! She'd never hornswoggle ol' Gatrie!" Shinon: "How can someone with only days left to live manage to walk the streets looking for a knight with lots of money?" Gatrie: "Because... Because she needed to meet me! It's fate! Remember?" Shinon: "Then why isn't she here?" Gatrie: "B-because... Um... Wolves?" Shinon: "No, Gatrie. It's not wolves."

He's a LOT gentler about this than he was about Gatrie's other bad deals. Like he knows this is gonna hurt Gatrie, so he's not gonna mess around about it. Gatrie takes it pretty damn well though.  Shinon is madder than Gatrie is?

Gatrie: "Oh... Hee hee! Hee hee hee! I guess ol' Gatrie... Whaa ha ha! I guess I got taken again! Whaa ha ha ha... Whooo! Oh man, I'll never learn." Shinon: "Tell me what she looks like." Gatrie: "Huh? Why?" Shinon: "All your money? That's going too far. I'll find her and...get it back."

Shinon's willing to Go To Bat for Gatrie when it comes down to it.  Of course, Gatrie is arguably too nice about this and says he's fine with it, Shinon doesn't need to do all that.

Shinon: "Sigh... You're hopeless, Gatrie. You know that?" Gatrie: "Yeah, I know. But I don't mind so much. It makes me kinda charming, right?" Shinon: "Well, I guess you don't have to worry about what to do with your money anymore." Gatrie: "Yeah, that's right. Hey, if you look at it that way, it's a blessing in disguise!"

Check it out: That fucking instant subject change when Gatrie asks if his gullibility makes him charming.  Shinon neither confirms nor denies that shit!! Like I said, I don't think Shinon expects this to actually go anywhere and even if he did, now would Not be the time.  Shinon's not about to make a move or anything, but he does make an effort to cheer Gatrie up:

Shinon: "Let's go find a watering hole with some cute waitresses. What do you say?" Gatrie: "Hey, that's a great idea! Oh, but... I don't have any money. Sorry, Shinon. Maybe some other time." Shinon: "Forget it. It's my treat." Gatrie: "Are...are you sure?" Shinon: "Yep." Gatrie: "Hee hee hee!" Shinon: "What's so funny?" Gatrie: "Supper on your gold piece? This is my lucky day!" Shinon: "Hopeless."

So FINALLY Shinon takes Gatrie out for dinner for once.  He's smiling fondly when he calls Gatrie hopeless that last time, he's very obviously feeling some sort of affection.  I think you can make a case that he's talking to himself a little bit too... Like Gatrie is a Disaster and yet... This is who Shinon likes... They're both hopeless tbh.  They definitely don't have the healthiest romantic dynamic, I have to admit that, but??? There is Something there.  Like Shinon is too flirty with Gatrie (he gets the guy to buy him dinner HOW OFTEN, like that is a Fake Date, Shinon is making an organized effort to Fake Date Gatrie as a substitute for Real Dating him) and Gatrie is honestly pretty receptive to it??  My personal headcanon for the situation is that Shinon has A Thing for Gatrie that he kind of tries to ignore but he also cares about Gatrie as a person and wants to be there for him when shit's rough and is enough of a decent person deep down that he wants to be happy for Gatrie a little bit, like he's probably Considered ruining Gatrie's fucking life all the time just because he's jealous but he always talks himself down from that shit because like... Bad, while Gatrie is??? sorta into this, he definitely likes Shinon and even Like likes him a bit, but he's too bogged down in heteronormativity to connect the dots about the feelings on either side (I say this sympathetically, I have Been There once upon a time).  I believe in him tho... He'll figure his shit out eventually...

Like I said way earlier, they can handle each other's personalities, like Gatrie doesn't even to seem to CARE that Shinon is massive dick, he p much just manages to brush it off.  And for all that Shinon complains about Gatrie being gullible and annoying, he's sure not going anywhere.  So when Shinon tries to neg Gatrie or w/e, Gatrie barely notices the insult part and sticks around.  And Gatrie basically can't do his typical Big Flirt because that depends on the person he's flirting with thinking he's cool and suave and Shinon already KNOWS that Gatrie's not really either of those things (at least not by the definition that Gatrie is going for), like he knows whatever incident Gatrie is referring to when he talks about "that business with the dragon" and I am so so sure it's not nearly as impressive as that summary makes it sounds (like if it wasn't something he was Completely making up, he probably just... got rid of a big lizard from someone's tent or something) and Shinon would def call that shit out.  Gatrie goes to him for advice a lot and is p much just himself around Shinon??  So like, not that he'd never try and not that Shinon wouldn't probably just laugh at him (which isn't strictly a negative response), but Gatrie kinda dug himself into the hole of Being Genuine with Shinon at some point, which I think is a much more stable starting point for a romantic relationship than how he approaches the women he's interested in.  Basically I don't... see them having a successful long-term romantic relationship with anyone else??  GOD I really did not want to end this meta like that, but I'm finally running out of stuff I wanted to say lmao.  Anyway, basically all of this was just to say that I love their dynamic even tho it's a lil messed up and there's def a Something going on there in canon imo altho I doubt it's an Official Relationship.  Hoooly fuck if you read all of that, thank u.

[nickireadstfc]

The Raven King, Chapter 4 – Andrew Does Shit No One Expects Him To, Pt. 2

In which Orange Sportsball finally starts to form into something resembling teamwork, the Foxes drag Neil for “I’m fine”, I suggest a quality mascot design, and Neil pulls some sweet stunts, only to be dramatically and jaw-droppingly out-stunted by Andrew ‘Extra’ Minyard.

Sounds good? Then it’s time for Nicki to read The Raven King.

GUESS WHO’S FCKNG BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have risen from the ashes of my shattered laptop, finally ready to once again bring you the foxy shitpost content you love and deserve. I’m writing this from a Dell brick that probably came out while I was still in elementary school and weighs as much as a small child, but I don’t care. It has a keyboard and a screen and Microsoft Word, and that’s all that matters.

Back not with a fizzle, but with a bang: I bring you an event filled with drama, shade and Extra, brimming with excitement and recklessness –

The first actually epic Exy game of this series: Palmetto State vs Belmonte University.

(This is a tad longer to make up for lost time, so strap yourselves in.)

           They were driving back after the game instead of checking into a hotel for the night. (…) They could have just hired a driver like most schools did, but Wymack was almost as leery of dealing with outsiders as his Foxes were. It was apparently better to be uncomfortable but safe than to trust a stranger with his fractured team.

This is ya friendly reminder that Wymack is a badass protective mother hen and deserves everything good in this world. My dude :’)))))))))) #dicksoutforwymack

           They stopped for gas and a bathroom break, stopped again for a quick dinner, and crossed a time zone on their way to Nashville.

And this is ya friendly reminder that American is large as hell. DIFFERENT TIMEZONES. IN THE SAME COUNTRY. How is this a real place.

They arrive at the stadium and Neil is once again faced with his worst enemy (besides new clothes):

Communal showers.

           The only reason the Foxes had private stalls on the men’s room was because Wymack specifically commissioned them. Neil forcibly focused back on the task at hand. First he had to survive the game, then he could worry about the showers.

I initially wanted to make fun of the fact that this is a real sentence, but actually I kind of understand what it’s like to not want to show parts of your body to everyone, so. He gets a pass.

Also, the idea of trans!Neil just does not leave my head. I want a billion pieces of fanart/fanfic now.

It’s almost game time!

           Neil didn’t see the Vixens, the Foxes’ all-girls cheerleading squad, or their mascot Rocky Foxy.

The have a fucking mascot??? Oh my actual God. What is it, an oversized Fox? Complete with a jersey, a black eye and a big FUCK YOU spelled on its forehead to match the team?

Why have we never heard of this before, this is the best thing ever.

           [Belmonte’s Terrapin mascot] stopped a safe distance back from their benches to make a couple crude thrusts at them. Nicky was happy to return it until Wymack swatted him upside his head.

Oh Nicky, never change. <3

           Kevin pulled one of his racquets free, fingered the strings like they might have come loose on the drive, and went over to the court walls. He didn’t spare the crowd a single look; all he cared about was right in front of him.

And if you look to your left, you’ll see Kevin being his usual Exy-obsessed, stoic and mighty self.

Also ahehehehe… Fingered. Hi, I’m 12.

As they are getting ready, Neil gets some sweet advice from Kevin – basically, only do boring ass gameplay until the second half and then go so hard you and I both bust a nut, also Andrew should realistically collapse field from withdrawal but he’ll probably hold up through sheer ego alone.

Sounds legit and like there could be nothing going wrong with it, at all.

We also briefly meet Katelyn, Aaron’s crush and – as I’m guessing – probably his date for the banquet thingy they’ve got coming up soon.

(You think I forgot about that, didn’t you. I never forget about opportunities for Fox banter, dress-up and hilarious social situations.)

However it’s not entirely a fun encounter as it’s time for another episode of our popular show What The Actual Fuck, Andrew?:

           “Oh.” Andrew slapped his fist into his palm as if the answer had just occurred to him. He flashed Matt a wicked grin but answered in German. “Maybe he’s afraid she’ll die on him like the last woman he really loved.”

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK, ANDREW. Also, what the actual fuck, backstory. I need it now.

No time to ponder on it, it’s game time, fuckers!

We’re kicking things off a bit unusual – literally:

           Neil listened for a serve that didn’t come. For a second he was afraid Allison would lock up and refuse to move. He was halfway to Herrera before he heard the distinctive thump of a ball against Andrew’s oversized racquet. Allison had served it back to him, and Andrew smashed it up the court toward the strikers.

Have I mentioned how much I love functioning teamwork amongst my children? Because fuck, yeah.

Have I mentioned what I also love? Some good ass Kevin/Neil Exy action.

           The only bright point was realizing his lessons with Kevin were paying off. (…) Passing wasn’t what Neil wanted to do in this game, but he could already see how he was improving. His shots were harder and more accurate, and it took him less time to figure out where to throw.

My beb :) improving :) being taught by Kevin because Kevin sees the heaps of potential in this boy and wants to make him the best he can :) I’m fine :)

           Wymack (…) send out his substitutes. Neil wasn’t between Kevin and the door, but Kevin detoured past him anyway on his way out.

           “Destroy him”, he said.

           Neil felt like he’d been waiting for this all his life. “Yeah.”

Fuck yEAH :’)))))))))))

(Again, reminding you all that I am passionate multishipper who gets into p much any ship if dynamics present themselves unto her, unless they are super problematic. If I make any comments about ships you don’t like – cool, we all have our own tastes but please don’t send me rude comments about it.)

From that point on, my friends, the game finally catches me and holds my attention way more than the first game did. It’s on, you guys. Passes are flying left and right and our faves are working together, I really cannot stress enough how much I love functioning teamwork.

And then, of course, Neil pulls This Shit™:

           He knew Herrera was right behind him for a body check. If he got crushed between the wall and Herrera, he’d lose the ball in the fight. Neil caught the ball right off the wall but didn’t try to protect it. Instead, he gave the butt of his racquet a hard pop with one fist. It sent the ball flying straight up out of the net. He dropped to his knees in the same breath.

           He almost wasn’t fast enough. Herrera crashed into him at full speed a half-second later, but Neil wasn’t where Herrera was expecting him to be. He tripped over Neil’s body and (…) crashed into the wall head-first. (…)

           Neil scooped the ball up and took off for goal. (…) He looked only at the goalkeeper and knew he was going to score. He put all of his first-half frustration behind his swing. The goalkeeper swatted at it and missed. The wall lit up red to confirm the point.

FFFUCKKK YEAHHH. This is the most badass shit he’s done since The Talk Show Incident™ (although nothing tops that ofc) and I am way proud of my son.

Also, Neil dealt with that backliner how I deal with my responsibilities: Letting them come at me full-speed and then swiftly ducking out of their reach.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Not before long, the first half is over and they’re at an even score! Amazing, wonderful, 100/10 proud mama right here.

           Neil couldn’t feel his feet, but he assumed they were down there somewhere. The shoulder he’d hurt in the first half was still throbbing thanks to the well-aimed blows of his new backliner mark.

What a fucking asshole move. Oh, you’re already injured there? Let me hit you a couple extra times, just for good measure, just to really fuck you up.

Remember that thing about Andrew staying off his meds, and how it’s going totally well? Yeah.

           Andrew stood a silent stone in their midst, looking a thousand miles away from all of this. He was a vacuum his teammates rowdy cheer couldn’t touch.

           “Stop it.” (…)

           Andrew slid a bored look Neil’s way. “I’m not doing anything.”

           “Exactly,” Neil wanted to say, but he knew it was a senseless argument. He didn’t have the right words for that gnawing feeling in his stomach.

Ah yes :)))

Wymack shows up and scolds them for not pushing harder earlier, yadda yadda, team talk. And then, I present to you the genuinely funniest thing to happen this chapter:

           Abby came to Neil last and stayed with him, feeling the line of his shoulder armour through his jersey. “How are you doing?” (…)

           “I’m fine.”

           Nicky fist-pumped in triumph. “Thank you for being so predictable, Neil. You just scored me ten bucks with two words.”

           Matt look up. “Are you serious? Who the hell bet against you?”

           Nicky jerked a thumb at Kevin. “There’s a sucker born every minute.”

I am hOWLING. I cannot believe they bet on his “I’m fine” oh my god this is the bEST.

DRAG. HIM.

The running gag of Neil “I’m fine” Josten will never not make my day. Neither will the Foxes’ obsession with betting on everything. I LOVE IT.

Kevin, never able to be anything but serious, drags him even more, but not in a fun way:

           “You’re an idiot. Do you see this?” he brandished his left hand at Neil. (…) “Injuries are not a joke. They are not something to gloss over. (…) If you ever say ‘I’m fine’ about your health again, I will make you rue the day you were born.”

Yikes.

           Abby eyed Neil. “I’ll ask again, then. Are you okay?”

           “I’m –“ It was too automatic a response. (…) “It’s just sore. So long as I can keep my mark off my right side I’ll be – okay.”

           Matt laughed at the near-miss. “I don’t see this experiment ending well, Neil.”

           “Some people are just hardwired to be stupid,” Wymack said.

I’m literally loving every single thing about this.

Fun times over, they go back on the field for second half, where Neil sits out on the sidelines at first and uses this opportunity to talk about his favourite subject: Andrew.

           “Why does Andrew do this?” Neil asked, unable to stay quiet any longer. “If he doesn’t care about Exy, what’s the point of going through this every Friday?”

           “Would you want to be crazy high every day of your life?” Matt asked.

No, but in my opinion, that still doesn’t add up. He could have probably picked any day to go meds-free, Wymack would have taken him anyways – I don’t know, pick every Sunday or every Monday or every Wednesday after lunch, it doesn’t matter. Why Exy?

The only logical reason to pick Exy days over other days is the possibility that – shocking! – Andrew does care about this dumb sport after all.

Excited for the final explanation of this. I have a hunch there’s still more to it.

In other news – my feelings:

           The Foxes were notorious for their shoddy teamwork, so most people forgot they were a Class I school. (…) If the Foxes could get over their differences and learn to compromise every once in a while, they’d be a formidable force. (…)

           Neil wanted to be part of this evolution. He wanted to feel the team click into perfect synchrony, even if it lasted only a moment.

Give me all that good teamwork, and give it to me now.

           The Terrapins came as hard as they could, but the Foxes shoved back with a ferocity the home team wasn’t expecting. They were exhausted, but Matt rallied the defense around him and Neil had permission to run himself ragged on the offense. (…) Every minute on the court brought him one minute closer to saying goodbye to Exy forever. He didn’t want to miss a single second.

As always, angst is the best motivator.

They’re all getting fired up and playing their hearts out when we near the most dramatic part of the game – the Foxes in the lead by one point, sixty seconds left on the clock. And then –

           Eight seconds from the end a terrapin striker got the ball. Aaron ran after him, but he was too exhausted to close the gap. The striker’s ten steps took him all the way to the foul line for his shot.

Oh shit.

           The goal was too wide and Andrew too small; there was no way Andrew could stop a shot this close-range. (…) Even if Andrew could get there fast enough, the ball was too low to the ground for him to swing his massive racquet.

Oh. Shit.

           Except Andrew was moving before the striker finished taking his shot, as if he already knew where the striker was going to aim, and he didn’t even try to swing. He threw himself at the ground as far over as he could and slammed his racquet down between the ball and the goals so hard Neil heard wood crack all the way across the court. He was just fast enough; the ball hit the taut strings of his racquet and bounced off.

OH SHITTTTTTTTT!!!!! BOI!!!!!! THE FUCK!!!!!! IM YELLING!!!!

This is exactly the sort of Extra and Dramatic Shit™ I was missing.

HOLY SHIT, WHAT A SAVE.

And with that, the game is over, FUCK YEAH.

Andrew, of course, is now completely done.

           Kevin didn’t have to ask what was going on. He’d lied to cameras for years and knew how to buy Andrew time. (…)

           Andrew let go with one hand and gestured. Kevin gestured back as if having an actual conversation. The only sound either of them made was the desperate gasp of air through clenched teeth as Andrew tried not to get sick in front of the crowd.

Cool move, actually. They seem to have done this before? I continue being beyond intrigued by their dynamic.

           The rest of the team fell in around them, bringing the celebration to their strikers and forming an impromptu barricade around their fallen goalkeeper.

Team <333

Protect that smol sick bastard, he just saved all your asses.

They get Andrew off the court safely, and with that, it’s good things all around.

           Neil had never seen Wymack smile like this. It was small but fierce, as angry as it was proud. “That’s more like it. Draw sticks and figure out who’s helping me fend off the press. The rest of you get your sticky, stinky asses to the showers.”

What a DAD. Love him.

           “Renee and I will handle it,” Dan said as they headed to the locker room. “Neil, you can use the girls’ showers while we’re busy.”

           Neil stared at her. “What?”

           Dan frowned at him, so Matt explained. “There aren’t stalls here.”

LET ME FUCKING LOVE YOU. I cannot get over this move, what the hell, that is so sweet.

Foxes being there for each other :’) I’m fine :’)))))))))))))

           Neil had noticed, but he hadn’t thought his teammates would. That they had, and that they were doing something about it, knocked the wind out of him. He tried to answer, but he didn’t know what to say. The best he managed was, “Is that really okay?”

           “Kid, you’re killing me,” Nicky said. “Why do you always get that deer-in-the-headlights look when someone does something nice for you?”

Yet another installment in our popular series Neil Doesn’t Realize People Actually Care About Him, episode 4 of a billion!

Before we finally leave this long-ass trip of a chapter, Andrew briefly joins Wymack, Andrew, and Andrew’s new best friend Johnnie Walker Blue for a chat:

           “Why did you pay for stalls, Coach?”

           Wymack lifted one shoulder in a shrug. “Maybe I knew you’d need them one day.”

           Andrew smiled around the mouth of his bottle. “Neil is a walking tragedy.”

           “You’re a pretty pathetic sob story yourself,” Wymack said.

Smol beans :’) bonding over how fucked up they are :’) love em.

Also #dicksoutforwymack, all day, every day. Maybe I knew you’d need them one day, holy shit, please have my platonic babies.

           Andrew headed for the door, but Neil put a hand in his path. “How did you do it? How did you know where to go?”

           “Coach said Watts always takes his penalty shots to the bottom corner. With the game riding on him he was bound to do the same.”

           Neil stared at him, startled and disbelieving. (…) It’d been an off-the-cuff remark amidst a lot of other information. Neil hadn’t thought Andrew was even paying attention to Wymack’s spiel.

Well, my dude, seems like someone gives more fucks than we all were starting to think. OF FUCKING COURSE. I’m still grinning my face off writing this.

And with that, they’re off, back on the bus home, and we’re letting this chapter ring out but some good ol’ Neil “Oh shit, what’s this, good feelings, get them away from me” Josten.

           As he listened to them, Neil realized he was happy. It was such an unexpected and unfamiliar feeling that he lost track of the conversation for a minute. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt this included or safe. It was nice but dangerous.

           Someone with a past like his, whose very survival depended on secrecy and lies, couldn’t afford to let his guard down. But as Nicky laughed and leaned closer to talk about one of Neil’s goals, Neil thought maybe he’d be okay for just one night.

:’))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Nicki out.

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