#playing a song in my head etc) theres still smaller branches of it that are commenting on what im doing? they're louder than the usual
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Lmao I found this old video I made to try and explain what my mind sounds like most of the time and its. Pretty accurate
(warning for just way too many sounds playing at once. Seriously it isn't a fun time lmao)
#its usually like#two or three random parts of a song just looping in my head#(if i focus and kinda mentally say the lyrics i can listen to the full thing? but theres like me 'talking' in my head and the song playing#in my head as two seperate things sk sometimes the song skips ahead/jumps randomly/loops random parts#and if i dont focus my mental singing does that too)#uh if im reading or writing something thats usually being read out in there#i have kinda an internal voice? so like i talk in my head and thats usually one of the loudest things in there#and the only thing i have full control over#i went through a weird years long phase where i was constantly narrating myself in second or third person which was. interesting#sometimes random phrases (either written or spoken) get stuck in there#and other random trains of thought start and stop that i dont think i have control over?#but they all kinda comment on each other sometimes#like 'hey i should do this it would be funny' and then the main/spoken train of thought goes 'no i shouldn't im just doing that for#attention' 'actually no im just thinking this for attention' 'everything i do is to fit a specific mental image i want to project'#'what the fuck are you on about i dont want to do this again im at work'#after a certain point its just my main train of thought arguing with itself lmao#and most of the time even when i switch the main train of thought to focus on something (writing#playing a song in my head etc) theres still smaller branches of it that are commenting on what im doing? they're louder than the usual#random trains of thought but not as loud as the main one (also not in my control? no fucking clue lmao)#idk it's a lot#kinda frustrating i spend so long in there and yet i have no clue how to visualise/explain it but w/ever#i dont even know if i can see images in there lmaoo#me.txt
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