#prance darty

[erikbergstrom-blog]

PRANCE DARTY (a stand-up comedy show) every Thurs 8pm at the Knitting Factory at Baker Falls (101 Ave A, NYC)

PRANCE DARTY is a stand-up comedy show with Erik Bergstrom (Comedy Central, Colbert) and some of his favorite comedians. 8pm every Thursday at the Knitting Factory NYC at Baker Falls (101 Avenue A, New York, NY, 10009)

8/31 with: Ophira Eisenberg (Comedy Central, NPR, HBO) Myq Kaplan (The Tonight Show, Letterman) Abbi Crutchfield (MTV, VH1) Mike Drucker (Tonight Show, Bill Nye Saves the World) Knitting Factory at Baker Falls101 Avenue A, New York, NY, 10009

[slafkovskys]

neeeed more possessive quinn and angel thots pls

luke was going because a good percentage of his friends were still going to umich and he had only left a few months before, so spotting him on the sidelines at one of the first football games of the season wouldn’t be weird. jack was going because luke was going and because she had promised to get him to a darty while he was on campus. jack would never turn down a good party.

quinn, however, had said no when she pouted her lips at him in the kitchen upon finding out he was the only one not going. he said no again as he busied himself on his phone beside her in the nail salon and she batted her eyelashes towards him as her tech made the intricate design he had chosen on her fingernails. he said no for a third time when she was between his legs. he was stronger than his brothers, she couldn’t just ask him to do whatever she wanted while he was a little cum dumb and get her way. they both knew that.

it’s when she’s modeling her game day outfits for them in the living room that he caves. her prancing around in a navy blue cheer skirt that barely covered her ass and a white tank top with a maize-colored m in the center has him feeling something. the last time that quinn remembers feeling like this, this pang in his chest, the twisting in his stomach, is when he was ten and luke was six and his youngest brother stole his favorite action figure out of his room.

he remembers seeing it sticking out of luke’s backpack as they were walking to the bus stop and ripping it away, yelling something about it being his because it was. luke had no right to take something that was so obviously his (going through a toy story phase months before, he scratched his name on the sole of the toy’s boot so there’d be no question) and now here he was, almost twenty-four years old and watching the girl he shares with his brothers strut around their living room in little outfits with his alma mater plastered on them.

he watches as jack tries to slip a hand up her skirt and she shoves his hand away while luke watches bemused, “see, angel, i’m just showing you why you need to be careful about bending over when we go out-”

“it’s a good thing we’ll all be there, then,” quinn clears his throat and her head whips around to look at him. “y’know, to make sure nobody tries anything and you get to wear your cute outfits.”

she squeals and bounds over, straddling his legs easily. his hands go to grip onto the back of her thighs as she presses a quick kiss to his lips, “oh, thank you quinny! it’s going to be so much fun!”

fun was absolutely the last thing that quinn was having.

she had made good on her promise of dragging them to a darty and he felt so out of his element. it had been over four years since quinn had been a student at the university, everyone he knew (with the exception of her) had long graduated and moved on with their lives.

luke had cliqued off with dylan, ethan, and everyone else from his year. jack had gone off with brisson somewhere and he was really hoping that wasn’t him he saw in line for the mechanical bull. quinn had been attempting to make himself invisible as he also balanced keeping her in his sights. he was always aware of her, even more so that they were in somebody's crowded backyard and she was likely immune to the eyes on her as she downed another seltzer.

there’s one guy, tall and unnaturally blonde, who had been watching her similar to how a predator watches prey. quinn stands up a lot straighter when the kid steps away from his friends at the same time that she does and he watches with narrowed eyes as she finds her way into luke’s arms. the guy stops in his tracks and his shoulders fall and quinn can’t help the smug smile that graces his lips.

he watches as she turns in luke’s arms, his brother’s hands a light weight on her stomach as she holds onto his wrist, as her eyes search the crowd for something, for someone. her eyes land on him and he sends a quick to finger wave to which she pouts. she uses the hand that wasn’t holding onto luke to beckon him over and he goes easily, leaving nico mid-conversation about some golf trip he was trying to pitch to his other clients.

“quinny,” she whines and he knows she’s tipsy. luke doesn’t say anything, only sparing his brother a glance as he approaches and loosening his grip on their girl when he realizes it’s only him before turning his attention back to mark, “what’s wrong?”

he shakes his head, “nothing-”

“it is,” she interrupts and he raises an eyebrow, “you’ve got you’re annoyed face on. c’mon, tell me.”

he wants so badly to reach out and touch her, pull her out of luke’s arms and into his just so everyone at this party knows that she’s his too, but he can’t. instead, he sighs, “it’s nothing that you need to worry about, angel. just have fun. do you want another drink?”

“i want you to tell me the truth, quinn.”

and she never called any of them by their names. it was always quinny, jacky, lukey, or some pet name. she only did that when she was mad or annoyed and he could tell that she was over him not telling her what was making him have such a sour expression. she narrowed his eyes and he sips his beer before giving into the girl, “there’s a guy that won’t stop staring at you. it’s pissing me off.”

“you’re jealous?” she sends him a playful grin and his mouth is back to being set in a hard line. she shakes it off and leans back into luke’s chest, humming at the feeling of the boy’s thumb hooking into the waistband of her skirt, “where is he?”

“over by the bouncy castle.”

“over by the- oh my god. tripp?” she looked at him like he was crazy, “he’s in my creative writing class! he’s really nice and we help each other out with assignments and things.”

“oh, he’s nice?” there’s venom coating the word as he says it, “does he know that you have a boyfriend?”

“yes, he knows that i have a boyfriend, quinny,” she rolls her eyes before something switches, “but you know what he doesn’t know?”

quinn raises an eyebrow at the almost teasing grin that stretches across her lips. she taps at luke’s arm and they immediately fall, setting her free. she closes the couple foot gap between them and quinn’s eyes go wide as she smooths her hands down his chest. he warns, “angel-”

“he doesn’t know that i have two other boyfriends, too, and that’s not fair,” her lips fall to that signature pout as she grabs onto his hands and places them so suggestively on her ass. quinn can feel the end of that stupid skirt against his fingertips as her breath fans over his jaw, “it’s okay to be jealous, quinny. i’m just as much yours as i am luke’s or jack’s.”

“we’re in public,” quinn’s jaw clicks as she presses her lips to his neck. they had never done anything like this outside of the privacy of the lake house and god, was quinn’s brain going to short-circuit any minute. luke’s not even paying attention to the two of them, but he catches dylan sparing them a glance and when his eyes find quinn’s he quickly looks away.

“i know. i’m letting tripp know that my boys take care of me,” she leans her body more into his and it’s like muscle memory when his fingers grasp her ass cheek. he knows his thumb is resting right over the red ink that reads ‘bite me’ as she giggles, “he’s watching us.��

quinn smirks when luke finally looks at them and where quinn’s hand is. he nods, raising his drink to his brother before pointing something out to ethan. quinn’s chest rumbles as she grabs onto his shirt, wondering how long they could disappear without anyone noticing before the game started, “good.”

[dipulb3]

2020 Ferrari F8 Spider first drive: The perfect summer fling

New Post has been published on https://appradab.com/2020-ferrari-f8-spider-first-drive-the-perfect-summer-fling/

2020 Ferrari F8 Spider first drive: The perfect summer fling

The breadth of flexibility in modern supercars is staggering. A 710-horsepower Ferrari F8 Spider will make you laugh maniacally when you launch it and rip your face off with its cornering force. But it’ll also run errands with the docility of a Honda Accord. A very loud, very flashy Honda Accord.

Every new Ferrari has to be engineered to lap the hell out of Fiorano or Monza, even if most will never even see so much as the parking lot of a race circuit. That makes a car like the F8 Spider surprisingly easy to live with and enjoy every day — especially on a warm summer afternoon in Southern California. But make no mistake, that doesn’t mean it’s any less thrilling. 

Steven Ewing/Roadshow

You can’t see the V8 from outside the car, but you can see what’s behind you through the rearview mirror. Kind of hard to decide which is more important with a Ferrari.

You’ve already met the F8 Tributo, the very worthy successor to the incredible Ferrari 488. The F8 packs more power, its interior is more luxurious and its exterior design makes a stronger statement — for better or worse. I’ll be honest, my personal descriptors of this car’s styling aren’t exactly positive — “a little much” is what’s written down in my notebook — but it certainly wouldn’t be a Ferrari if it didn’t turn heads. I can’t think of another car that nearly caused so many gawking-induced wrecks over the course of 24 hours.

When you remove the roof, which takes just 14 seconds, the Spider does away with one of the F8 Tributo’s most controversial features: the rear window. On the Tributo, this is made of Lexan, and sliced three times for visual interest. Does it look cool? Sure. Does it absolutely kill rearward visibility? You betcha. Instead, the Spider has a body-colored rear panel, underneath which is where the roof is stowed when folded back. This means you can’t actually see that monstrous V8 from outside the car. But it means you can see what’s behind you through the rearview mirror. Kind of hard to decide which is more important with a Ferrari.

After all, that engine is one hell of a showpiece. As in the F8 Tributo, the Spider’s 3.9-liter twin-turbo V8 makes 710 horsepower and 568 pound-feet of torque, and thanks to a lighter crankshaft and flywheel, the engine weighs about 40 pounds less than the one in the 488. Huge side intakes feed cool air into the turbochargers, and the large inset tailpipes belt out a song that isn’t quite as intoxicating as a naturally aspirated V8 rasp, but it’ll nevertheless wake the neighbors two blocks away on a cold start.

Setting off in Los Angeles traffic, I found the F8 Spider had a very brief learning curve. Push a button for reverse, pull the right paddle to put the seven-speed automatic transmission into first gear. Use the toggles on the steering wheel to activate the turn signals (I hate this, by the way). Hit the suspension button on the left side of the wheel to put the F8 in Bumpy Road mode, giggle at the cuteness of the name and then enjoy the suddenly smoother ride quality. Don’t bother with anything but the default Sport mode in city streets or on the highway. And don’t bother looking for any driver assistance features. There aren’t any.

Even before you get to a good driving road, the F8 Spider clearly communicates its intentions. The steering is borderline darty with its quickness, but gives you plenty of detail about what’s happening where your tires meet the pavement. The brakes are a little tough to modulate, but offer a reassuringly strong bite, letting you know they’ll be there to bring you back to reality should you get carried away. The V8 has a huge reserve of power, but it doesn’t feel like a dam that’s about to burst. You can roll onto the throttle and accelerate up to highway speeds quickly, but not overwhelmingly so.

But when you get off the highway and point that homely nose up a canyon road, holy cannoli, does the F8 rip. Ferrari quotes a 0-to-60-mph acceleration time of 2.9 seconds, matching that of the hardtop F8 Tributo, the shift lights on the steering wheel flashing red just before you pull the paddle and slap into the next gear. The rear-wheel-drive Spider has no trouble clawing into the road and putting the full brunt of its power through those 305-section tires. The front end lifts slightly as you launch forward. The V8 wails. The world flies by. Do not let go, and be sure your hat’s on tight.

Steven Ewing/Roadshow

What appears to be a small cockpit is actually quite roomy, especially with the Spider’s endless headroom.

This is where you find the other end of the F8’s capability spectrum. Every turn is rewarding. Every power-on moment out of a hairpin makes me smile. Every action in the F8 is so perfect that it starts to feel effortless after a while. And just when I think I’m not giving the car my all, digging even deeper into the throttle reveals a whole ‘nother level of aggression I hadn’t yet discovered.

I could do this all day long.

That’s especially true given how comfortable the F8 Spider is, even with the — gulp — $9,112 carbon fiber racing seats (which of course then means adding the $2,531 racing seat lifter, as well as the $1,266 prancing horse emblems on the headrests, and you should absolutely have them done up in blue like my tester). With its shallow center tunnel and slim row of climate controls on the lower part of the dashboard, what appears to be a small cockpit is actually quite roomy, especially with the Spider’s endless headroom. There isn’t exactly much in the way of storage space, however, even in the front trunk, which is big enough for a pair of backpacks and not much more.

Should your co-driver get bored (hint: drive faster), the $4,556 7-inch touchscreen passenger display has more features than it did in the 488, showing things like multimedia and navigation information, as well as performance metrics like acceleration and cornering forces so they can back up the experience with real data.

Steven Ewing/Roadshow

Speaking of in-car tech, well, there isn’t much to speak of. A rudimentary infotainment system is housed in a small screen in the gauge cluster, controlled by a knob and some buttons to the right of the steering wheel. The experience isn’t all that great, so I recommend just working through Apple CarPlay, assuming you’re an iPhone user, and assuming you don’t mind spending a wholly absurd $4,129 for the privilege of using your own tech.

Not that money really matters when you’re talking about a Ferrari. After all, the $302,500 starting price — which includes $3,950 for destination and a $1,300 gas guzzler tax — is really just the beginning. Once you option it up to your ideal spec, you’ll be shelling out a boatload of additional cash. The Giallo Modena car you see here? It’s got $94,494 in add-ons, including titanium exhaust pipes, carbon fiber pieces and a premium audio system. At $396,994 as tested, this Ferrari is more expensive than any house I’ve ever lived in. Neat.

The real figure to care about is $23,000, because that’s how much more the Spider costs than the F8 Tributo coupe, which is basically chump change if you can already afford to park a Ferrari or three in the driveway of one of your many homes. That giant caveat out of the way, I say live a little and go for the Spider. It looks just as good (so I’m told) and performs every bit as admirably, whether you’re running through canyons or just running errands.