#sairambles

[arashi-no-saxlphone]

Axl Low is conceptually so funny in-universe. You've got this poor guy who by all accounts is the sweetest coolest guy, but he's literally a gang leader. BUT. He leads a gang to end violent crime in his town and he does it by fighting but without netting a SINGLE CASUALTY while doing it - he just beats up all these criminals and almost every single time they're like "This guy kinda rules I'm signing up with him actually" and he SUCCEEDS in ending crime in his neighborhood doing that. Then he meets his girlfriend and she thinks he's such a weird goofy guy and she falls in love instantly. Things are Great and then he is Yeeted Through Time multiple times. He ends up a few hundred years into the future and he just kinda deals with it, maintaining a glass-half-full attitude for the majority of that time despite this being probably one of the most horrifying things that can happen to a person. No one really cares about all that though, because the guy with time powers is Very Dangerous because of the time powers. Imagine being told "That guy over there is an extremely dangerous threat to reality on a metaphysical level" and you look over and they're pointing at some guy with the Union Jack plastered all over him just DESTROYING a hamburger and he looks over and waves at you.

By Xrd and Strive he's got control of his powers, and this makes him A Very Seriously Dangerous Threat. The Original contacts him personally to deliver a message to The Fucking Gear Maker. The Gear Maker sees him cause like "Holy shit. The Axes of Time. This guy is very dangerous and we should be careful" and Axl Low shows up, asks him if he's The Famous War Criminal Who Caused All This Bullshit, and freaks out and leaves when said war criminal offers him cookies for his trouble.

Jack-O asks Sol in Strive what the biggest threat to the world is right now and he goes "Axl" with a straight face. They talk about how dangerous he could be and within 4 seconds of that conversation Axl Low drops out of Fucking Nowhere onto their Speeding Motorcycle cause he needs Sol's help to save some innocent people on a hunch. How do you not shit yourself? I'll tell you how - because Axl Low is the equivalent of accidentally tripping into hell and meeting the devil and it turns out that the devil is actually just a fluffy golden retriever who has NO idea what he's doing and just wants pats like any other normal dog. Except he is just really powerful so people make assumptions. "Absolute Power Corrupts Absolutely" not my boy Axl Low. Decided against doing what he wanted to get what he wanted most because he wasn't going to erase an entire timeline to get home, even though he easily could've justified it as "Not my problem, not my fault, this is awful." The second he has full control over his time powers he uses it to either help people or get fast food really quickly so he has time for a stupid quip after a round. What a fucking hilarious character dude imagine if you met father time and he was just like "can I borrow some cash for McDonald's?" because that's pretty much how he acts. And you're just bewildered so you're like sure, hand him a 20, and you blink and father time came back cause he got you some fries. I fucking adore this man.

[scrumandf1]

can finally change my url tomorrow for the world cup

[arashi-no-saxlphone]

Thinking about that one 4Koma where Axl and Testament compare Sickles/Scythes and just gush about it and also how they both canonically enjoy tea I just KNOW they would be besties. Please. Please. You see my vision. I'm not asking I'm telling you you see it.

[arashi-no-saxlphone]

Asuka's fundamental misunderstanding of personhood and the value of identity is one of the most fucking compelling things about him when you think about him - he has such poor self-esteem that he doesn't even understand his own identity or value so it makes so much sense that he's constantly fucking up everyone around him when it comes to their identity and bodily autonomy. He mentions at one point that he never felt in control of his life and never really made his own decisions - he didn't even want to become a scientist but felt pushed into it. He doesn't understand the emotions of others, he cares only about "reality" because that's what his whole life has been - reality, logic, the "correct" answer. So when Aria gets sick, he cryofreezes her. When she says she doesn't want to miss out on time with Frederick, he makes him immortal. When the Gears are planned to he used as weapons, he figures "Oh I'll make Aria into a command gear - won't matter if she gets to be woth Frederick, right?" basically RIGHT after a drama CD shows us that she values her own person immensely and who she is - she says that to Frederick. Then, when he tries to bring her back by creating the Jack-O Valentine unit, he's likely kind of perplexed by the fact that she's developed her own personality! Hell, he's probably baffled at the fact that Frederick seems to treat her like Jack-O and not Aria, but fuck me man, Frederick probably does that because he fucking remembers what Aria taught him about identity!! And after! Al of this! Asuka! Goes to the moon! And CLONES HIMSELF TO TRY AND UNDERSTAND IDENTITY AND WHO HE IS!!! HE FIGHTS BATTLE DATA OF ALL THESE PEOPLE TO TRY AND SEE IF HE CAN UNDERSTAND WHY EVERYTHING THAT MATTERS TO THEM MATTERS SO MUCH TO THEM! I am so sick. Do you get it? This man is so twisted but he isn't EVIL! He's just a little fucked up, and I think that all this is why he loves Frederick so much - this is the man who is everything he wants to be. He's sure of himself: he's the "find a way or make one" guy! Asuka spends so much time trying to quantify and understand the one thing that can't be measured with his understanding of "reality:" Humanity and love and emotions. BUT HE'S TRYING SO FUCKING HARD TO LEARN. You gotta see my vision you gotta see it I feel so fucking bad for this man.

[arashi-no-saxlphone]

Me: I'm just never going to fit in this world, something about me is fucked up and wrong and I can't figure out what it is. What am I supposed to do?

Guilty Gear: Fit in the world? Oh, like Axl Low, who was thrown through time into an existence that is a permanent possibility? Who refused a way back home and learned to change his perspective? Like Sol Badguy? Who was permanently changed and slept for long that when he woke the world he was in hated him and was no longer his own, but then found his own way to exist? Like A.B.A? Who doesn't fit in the world but doesn't care? Like Testament, who thought for certain they were doomed to be a monster and found love for life anyway?

Me: *sniffling*

Guilty Gear: It is going to be ok.

[arashi-no-saxlphone]

Thinking about how Johnny Guilty Gear is just an unashamedly good guy who acts like a little goofball. He adopts war orphans and gives them a home and a family. He goes around with the mission to "protect the innocent." He constantly affirms people and gives them lessons any time they're struggling with some aspect of life. Sol Badguy but just a little sillier.

In Strive he tells Testament "Looks like you finally understand the importance of family, huh?" it's mentioned offhand a couple times "Johnny usually only lets women on his ship. He lets Testament hang out sometimes though."

Johnny lost his father young, presumably his only family, and Kum mentions that Johnny doesn't rely on anyone unless he's really at the end of his rope.

Johnny knows what it's like to be lost, to be alone - he recognizes that in Testament the way they hide themselves away in the Grove with no one but Dizzy for company. He gets it, that's why he provides a home for all these lonely or lost people. Yet another character in Gear that is just so profoundly and deeply human, exhibiting the struggle of being a human being and also showing why it's so worth it to hang onto your humanity in spite of that. And yet he just acts like such a goofball.

Again: Sol Badguy, but he's a little silly.

[arashi-no-saxlphone]

I'm Blazing the Bullshit. I'm Smelling the Game. I'm... Blaming the Beasts? *Ky Kiske shakes his head disapprovingly* I'm riding the lightning? *Ky Kiske smiles and gives me a thumbs up* I nervously smile. Sol Badguy Tyrant Raves me in the spine and I am killed instantly.

Guilty Gear.

[arashi-no-saxlphone]

Most fucked up thing about Asuka is that he really was trying to help. He really did love Frederick and Aria. Except instead of an awkward normal like "Oh man I fucked up on understanding normal favors and social cues and now things are weird!!" he committed real, seriously atrocious crimes against the humanity of the two people he loved the most and wiped out over half the earth's population (indirectly). He's so fucking funny. I love him so much. I hear that part of "The Gravity" that's like "As the universe turned black / did the sun ever defy fate / beyond hope do you recognize me" and like. That's about Sol. That's about how much he loves and values Sol. He fucking put himself in a synthetic body because he wanted Sol to be able to recognize him no matter what. I'm so crazy about this. He's so fucked up and sad he's like the saddest wettest cat and it's like, barely his fault he just keeps compounding fuck up onto fuck up until he finally is like "Maybe I will just go to the moon now." That's so. Fucking sad. And then in the arcade mode the clone kind of implies Asuka made him to be able to still carry on work if his abilities are needed for some future disaster, because he didn't want to neglect his responsibilities for his actions, but also wanted to kill himself for what he's done (this might be a stretch on my part but that's what I was getting from the weird arcade story he has). And above all those complex layers, he is literally just some silly little nerd. He acts like a fucking dork. I'm so ill about him.

[arashi-no-saxlphone]

I fucking love Testament. Nagoriyuki: "OH OK KEEP TALKING" Testament: "Ok :)" *annoys him into being nice*

Also the fact that they're just... consistently reminding us how fucking strong Testament is. Like yeah they're normal now but they are still REALLY dangerous. Noted by both Chipp and Nagoriyuki. Charming. Also new Sin intro with them calls them scary LOL

[arashi-no-saxlphone]

something that's so rough about adoring Guilty Gear characters and actively playing the game is that I'm like "I love Sol Badguy he's an extremely well written character and allegory for living life in a way that matters to you. However he is bullshit fucking busted this patch you can't fucking keep this fucker off you all his combos are filled with burst baits and do a million damage and FUCK him." Which is a really bold stance to take when you play Axl Low, resident "annoying zoner motherfucker" who is probably agony to play against. Anyway there's a running joke that all competitive gear players hate every character cause at the end of the day, every character has something fucked up about their kit that's difficult to deal with and it just made me think the phrase "Not called Innocent Gear is it cunt" like that one transformers post and I laughed so hard I scared my dog.

[arashi-no-saxlphone]

Axl Low is literally insane and inhuman for making that decision at the end of Xrd btw. I know I keep bringing it up but I really don't think we appreciate just how fucking different you have to be to make that decision. Axl lived his whole life doing the right thing and trying to make the world around him better (ending gang violence in his neighborhood, refusing to take a life no matter what, that bit that mentions he cannot ignore someone in trouble) and after all that effort, he gets fucking shafted by fate. I need you to understand that for the majority of this series HE DID NOT HAVE CONTROL OF HIS TIME POWERS: HE WAS SLIPPING TO RANDOM POINTS IN TIME AND HAD NO IDEA WHY. There are a few moments where he gets happy with a specific situation and TIME SLIPS IMMEDIATELY! This happens to him for YEARS. Do you know how insane that would make the average person? He misses his home, he misses his friends, he misses his wife Tails (he misses her a lot), and he just can't do anything about it.

Now imagine after all that you find out you can go back. You have a way back home. "Finally, it's fucking over. I can be done"

Oh but hold on! You are a Time God now, a "Possibility!" If you go back you are essentially killing everyone in THIS timeline (which is fucked up and shitty and plagued by monsters, arguably) and you are just a normal man who has to cope with all of that! But hey, go back if you want, it's your power.

After YEARS of putting up with all that. Put yourself in Axl's shoes. Look me in the eye and tell me you'd give a flying fuck about any of that. Aren't you fucking tired at this point? You didn't ask for this. You were stolen from your time without your consent and time powers got basically stapled to you and now its YOUR fault? You should give a shit and be stuck here forever because of that?

Now, REALLY become Axl Low. Really look back at all that angry paragraph and think to yourself "Wow Sai, that's not how Axl thinks of it at all."

Exactly.

Axl agonizes over a decision that should be easy, even if that decision would be monstrous and selfish, because this is a man who is carried by PERSPECTIVE. Axl is a man who will tell you a glass is half full no matter how you phrase the stupid logic problem, and if you dump the glass out completely he'll just go and get you a fresh one. Axl talks to a bunch of people about his decision - hell, as I recall, Sol actually tells him if he tries that shit he'd try and stop him because that's his world you're erasing. Bedman talks about how much he cares for his sister. I-No talks about how no matter how powerful she is, she can never seem to write the future she wants. Axl seeks the advice of all these people and that's when he realizes:

These are people too. These are people just like him. They didn't ask for this fucked up world they're stuck in either, but they're all living in it. They're making it better. If they can all do it, hell, can't Axl do it too?

"A girl passed by a dog's bark bow wow the smell from that cafe makes me hungry I knew all about it"

Isn't there stuff in this world that makes it special too? Isn't life just as beautiful here too? Don't these people deserve to exist too?

"I'm alive. I'm alive. It is dramatic with just that."

He's still kicking isn't he? Sol's still around and he's been through hell - he's still finding time to drink with this goofy brit he keeps bumping into - Can't Axl find a way to live here too?

He outright admits to Sol that Megumi would probably forgive him - it's an impossibly unfair decision after all, he KNOWS that. But I think after seeing himself in all these people he knows what he'd want- he'd want to live and exist.

And Axl Fucking Low says "How could I be a man worthy of Megumi if I did that?" and saves the fucking world with Sol Badguy. He makes an impossible decision and stays here. And he says he's lucky.

You're the unluckiest man alive, Mr Low. I've not seen anyone get more unfairly treated by fate in my life. But then again-

I suppose I can't convince you how much water you've got in that glass.

[arashi-no-saxlphone]

Gaze upon my most powerful form

[arashi-no-saxlphone]

I am once again asking ArcSys to put in legacy costumes for Strive. No no no shut up about your blorbos I mean yes of course I agree but I am exclusively asking so they put Axl back into his sluttly little torn up male stripper outfit from Missing Link. Give it back to me. He looked so stupid. Put him back into it.

[arashi-no-saxlphone]

Axl post time: where is he getting money? He doesn't have a job. He's one of the only Gear characters with no occupation. He isn't even doing the bounty hunter thing, dude even BRIDGET is doing the bounty hunter thing. Is Sol constantly covering the bar tab? My man, TESTAMENT works in construction - they came out of the woods after decades and instantly slayed and got a job in CONSTRUCTION and like 30 hobbies - how does Axl not have a job? Is he homeless? Is he sleeping in the rough? (I think in the side manga with Tyr I forget what it's called he literally has an apartment - how???) This is literally not a big deal at all but pretty much everyone else has some kind of work going on yet Axl Low has been a wandering bum for 26 slutty, slutty years. Daisuke let me in I have questions. No don't call the police I just wanna talk I'm normal you can trust me.

[arashi-no-saxlphone]

I need need NEED more character to character intros in Strive. The Axl/Sol ones all make me smile so big can you imagine if Axl talked about Romeo to Delilah or if he and Bridget had lines??? I'm talking something stupid for the latter like "(thick british accent Axl)Great to finally meet someone who speaks my language!" followed up by "Uh... Mr Low? Why do you sound like that?"

[arashi-no-saxlphone]

Axl Low has changed my life because I hold my fast food like this now. Never had thought to do that. If you cradle the bag in the crook of your arm like that you can grab the drink with that same hand and have an entirely free hand for your keys. I can get into my car now. I realize this is an insane post but you have to understand I was walking to my car and didn't know how to get to my keys and I thought of this and was "This is fucking stupid but my whole world is different now. What the fuck."

Thank you Axl Low