#self-conscious about being the only weirdo who doesn't go by their given name like a normal person -> when people naturally get confused | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

leatherbookmark · 6 months

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was all \(￣︶￣*\)) about poasting on a kpop community on dw, but then i noticed an introduction post! yay! i love introduction posts! except oops, you gotta introduce yourself with a name, like normal people do. stressing

#shrimp thoughts #so this might be a shock to some. but shrimp is not what i'd consider a name. it's like a jokey nickname that i started to use towards #myself and then just went along w/ it. i COULD crowdsource but i'm incredibly picky and i don't want people to feel bad #i also could yknow just come up w/ something on my own but what's the guarantee that i won't grow to dislike it/feel that it's not “mine”#anymore. i'm your typical overly sensitive shy kid irl so when i tried going by eliza in uni it was like one teacher makes a face -> i get #self-conscious about being the only weirdo who doesn't go by their given name like a normal person -> when people naturally get confused #or call me by my given name i'm hurt but correcting them feels like an asshole thing to do so i don't (until i do something extra like #ignoring when someone calls me by my given name and going 'did you mean me? that's not my name >:/') AND SO i'm just scared that #people will see the glaring red HIGH-MAINTENANCE AND SELF-OBSESSED neon sign floating above my head if i pick another name #after having made All This Fuss already. even though no one here knows me irl so. yeah #talking about yourself in terms of who you are and how do you want people to refer to you is so embarrassing #like telling them “lies” feels -- again -- high-maintenance and self-obsessed but while i'm fine w/ family/old friends calling me by my #given name i Would Rather Not actively introduce myself with it if possible... ach! such is life.

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