#seriously tho thanks for sending this <333 even if you don't like spideypool lol

[sarah-sandwich]

what's a scene u edited a lot that felt less like battling a creature and more like planting a garden? <3

I love you for asking <333

All of the ones that immediately come to mind are from Lemon Boy because I'm editing it right now but I've shared so much of that fic I'm scared to share more until it's up lol

BUT the scene where Peter and Harley finally freaking talk to each other is going the garden route. I wrote it out of order, way before the story actually got to that point so it doesn't quite mesh up with the scenes before and after and their interaction is totally off.

My notes call it "confusing, melodramatic, and weepy" so you can imagine what kind of work I have ahead of me lmao but I'm going to transplant it into a cozy indoor pot, give it a good watering, and prune up the wilted bits. Then it'll flourish.

For a published example I'm going to go with the entirety of the first chapter of Paradise (spread out with a butter knife). I babied it to life and then babied it some more until I couldn't baby it any longer and posted it even though I hadn't finished the fic yet and I very rarely do that.

Idk if you like spideypool at all?? I'm very bad at keeping track lol but it's a really fun fic if you haven't read it! Rave reviews. Stupid humor and LOLs abound. Turns non-spideypool shippers into spideypool shippers. All my friends say so.

Excerpt below the cut if you need some convincing?

Deadpool sits up and a heap of hamburger wrappers cascade off his chest. “I know a job you could do.”

“Being your sugar baby isn’t a job, ‘Pool.”

“No, not that. A real job at uh, Pym… whatever it is.”

Peter sits up. “Pym? As in Pym Particles? As in, Hank Pym? The scientist? The research lab? That Pym?”

Deadpool snaps his fingers and points a finger gun at his chest. “That’s the one! I happen to know they’ve got an opening in R&D. Or they will soon. You made your tech right? I bet you’d fit right—,”

Peter jumps to his feet as his heart jumps into his throat. “What the fuck? Are you taking out a hit on one of Pym’s scientists?”

“Nooo,” Deadpool says unconvincingly.

“Dude!”

“I’m not. I just happened to catch wind that someone is.”

“Are you kidding me?”

“Listen, I looked her up. This lady is bad news. Like, experiments on puppies bad. She says shit like ‘All Lives Matter’ and—,”

“What does that have to do with anything?! We have to stop it!”

“We?”

“Yeah, we. You let it get this far, now you’re on the hook for saving this woman’s life. Come on.” He squats down and gestures impatiently at his back.

“Am I dreaming? A Spidey-back ride?”

“I will drop you in traffic if you say that again. Hurry up before I change my mind.”

Deadpool doesn’t waste another second before clambering up onto his back and wrapping his arms and legs around him.

“You’ll need to hold on tighter than that,” Peter says and then launches off the building.

Deadpool squeals in his ear and his grip turns suffocating as they plummet. Then Peter shoots a web and they swing up and away from the sidewalk. A breathless laugh ghosts past his ear and then Deadpool’s breath catches audibly as Peter releases the web and they begin to fall again. He thwips out another web and they begin another arc.

“WOOHOO!” Deadpool crows at the height of the arc, loud enough to make him flinch and to catch the attention of the people on the sidewalk below.

A reluctant smile tugs his lips. Yeah. Web swinging is pretty awesome. It’s kinda cool that someone gets it, even if it is Deadpool.

~*~

Peter flips back and pinwheels to the side to avoid the flurry of deadly looking laser beams. Red, violent, and wicked fast, it’s all he can do keep from getting hit while he’s the sole target of the beastly machine squatting in the corner of the lab.

“You said puppy experimentation! Not mad scientist bent on world domination!”

“I was starting with the worst offenses!” Deadpool snaps back, stabbing a katana into a bank of computers. They spark and the screens go black but the death lasers don’t stop. “You’re the one that wouldn’t let me finish! Besides, if you hadn’t webbed up poor Marty and had let him do his job, we wouldn’t be in this mess!”

“He was going to kill— Ugh! Whatever. For future reference, next time someone builds a Death-Ray-Inator that’s the first thing I wanna know about.”

“Noted.” With a grunt, Deadpool rips free his katana and sheaths it.

“Screw this!” He rips his pistol out of his thigh holster and aims it at the death ray.

“Wait—,”

He fires several times in rapid succession. The noise is deafening and the bullets ricochet around the room, rebounding off the metal-lined walls with deadly force.

Peter twirls, just barely avoiding a bullet to the abdomen as the heat of a laser skims past his nose.

“Dammit, Deadpool! That didn’t work the first time, why would you do it again?!”

“I got frustrated.” He holsters his gun, pouting through his mask.

“No more shooting! I have an idea.” He webs himself up onto the ceiling, shifts to the left just in time to avoid a laser to his back, and then scurries toward the far wall.

“What do I do?”

“Don’t move and don’t get hit.”

“Those are very contradictory instructions! What if I need to move to avoid getting hit? I don’t think you thought this through.”

He growls under his breath. Yeah he didn’t think this through alright. He should have left Deadpool on that rooftop and cleaned up this mess on his own.

“Just stay where I can find you!”

“Where you can find—,”

Only a few feet remain between him and the wall when his Spidey sense warns him to dodge. He leaps forward, avoids the deadly beam, and latches onto the electrical box hanging on the wall. Another flare from his Spidey sense has him dropping to the floor and throwing his arms over his head.

The laser beam collides with the electrical box.

Bang! The box explodes in a flare of green light and then the room goes dark. Hesitantly, he gets to his feet and breaths a sigh of relief.

“Uh, Webs?”

A laser fires from the Death-Ray-Inator, the red beam illuminating the white of the eyes on Deadpool’s mask before slamming into his chest and knocking him off his feet.

“Shit!” Peter stumbles over an overturned table, scrambling to get back across the pitch-black room where he left Deadpool. “‘Pool?”

“Still alive,” Deadpool wheezes. “Fuck, that smarts. Not much of a death ray though, huh?”

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