#so I'll probably have to go straight into the psychiatric hospital. I mean it's probably not that bad i hope its just gonna be stressful

[vinilsoup]

Every time I'm near my period I'm like "pls god don't send me to the psychiatric hospital" and sometimes he hears me. This time however may not be the case.

[dumplingsjinson]

(don't mind me if we've moved on, I'm just a simple follower with my bindle, showing up late to the party)

I'm by no means going into relationship counseling for my degree BUT I do work at a psychiatric hospital for raw experience (I work FL, baker act laws an all, very, uh special compared to other involuntary laws anywho-) and my physical degree is in research for broad psychology.

With that being said, let me be as brief as possible. I'm super proud of you for speaking up to this guy, a good handful of my patients can't even do that and they end up with me short-term because they said the wrong thing to the wrong person (oh FL, and your special wording) or another involuntary placement happens (ex-parte or marchman) because not all relationships are great or have boundaries or what have you.

(Also again, not 100% my forte here, but I've been burned in real life to the point that my two extremes became "study the human psyche like a bug" and "study the human body like a bug" but in a villain origin story sort of way, and I'm almost done with the psyche part, I'll be a real villain with the other part, not the point-). I did kind of scroll past some of your other vents about this and skimmed them so forgive me, I lack the attention span for things. I want you to know that your concerns look valid, and some of your friends (not us) also seem concerned (and some of us, here, also have concerns). You have a decently broad support system and you're using it in such a good way, don't let anyone take it from you (block out the haters. Spoons, CDs on the glasses). The reason we get suspicious from past things is also 100% valid, we've been burned (or however you personally want to describe it) before more likely than not. I'm not here to tell you to break up with your significant other immediately if there's no reason for it. You're allowed to be suspicious. But you're also doing great by working up this courage to speak up, that's one of the hardest steps. I know for me, speaking up in some situations (even coming off anon sometimes, I'm also super anti-social and I picked psychology as a degree, research as a pth and a psych hospital as a job, which is the most social thing I could find, 0 stars) often feels like those movie scenes with intense fear and anxiety, almost fishbowl-like, y'know what I mean?

Make yourself come first at the end of the day no matter what. You don't have to have main character energy in the sense that you own everything and get away with everything, but you should make sure you do things for you, not to keep the peace. If you're not happy, you've got a support system from what you've demonstrated, you can do anything with that. If you think something is amiss, trust that feeling, investigate safely, draw your own conclusions because obviously you know more than your devoted tumblr followers because we do not live in your head (that'd be weird, a constant party I'm sure, but still weird).

I personally don't know the full story, so I don't want to dictate your decision and I'm just some girl on anon who's crying over a piece of paper from a university, I've got my own life struggles beyond my piece of paper that I probably could've bought off Amazon if I were smart (alas, am not, went to school instead; I could probably solve my other struggle like that too right? anyone know a good neurologist I can buy off Amazon at this point. Mine completely forgot which patient I was LMAO she keeps asking if I'm her chronic TBI patient like bro? huh? so I'm back at square one with 0 treatment because of her stupidity, maybe worse because of how it happened, anyway this leads into my next point). A little venting only hurt people who want to be mad that they didn't blacklist what they don't want to see, a little venting might help you think straight, do what you gotta do so you can do what's best for you. This bubble is your world, not his, not mine, not some other anons, not another tumblr user's.

Like I said, I'm not very social, this is my anon two cents worth. My psych charcuterie board, my social interaction for the week. Time to fuck back off into the woods into my witch cabin once again, recharge, cause psychic damage to someone to balance out this anon, y'know, girlie things. (I said brief earlier and gave you a thesis I'm so sorry LMFAO I do that a lot).

First of all, I am very honoured you're out here writing out a thesis for me LMAOOO.

This was a really entertaining read I'm ngl, and I'm a little at a loss for what to reply with so excuse me for my brevity but thank you so much for the encouragement.

Ever since getting into this relationship, I feel like I've wracked up the nerves to communicate my needs and confront someone when something's gone wrong, or when something's irking me. The anxiety, or the want to get rid of that anxiety, is what drives me to do what I never thought I'd do. I'm starting to realise I'm someone who cannot let something sit on my chest or it'll absolutely suffocate me, so I let that be the driving force of getting me into action.

My brain basically works like this now: "We need to alleviate this anxiety now by talking with them. Is it nerve wracking? Yes. Does it feel like you're gonna die? Also yes. But could you let this sit on your chest for any longer than it already has before it actually fucking kills you? No. So just fucking do it and don't look back."

And yeah, my support system on both here and within my own friend group has helped immensely, I don't think I would have been able to do this alone.

Obviously, the mix of opinions and advice can sometimes make me feel a little bit muddled up on what to do, but I do end up taking some of the advice on board, mixed with my original plan on what to do, and it's full steam ahead after that.