mattwhorenett

[swallowtail-ageha]

So i watched the ep one of netflixvania out of morbid curiosity after reading my mutual @beevean 's rants about it and said by someone who is almost completely fandom blind regarding the games and between the fedora tipping type of atheism (i think that the authors have actually never met a priest before), the needlessly edgy way gore is drawn (i am not opposed to extreme gore, i am a dorohedoro fan, it's just that it's obvious that it's drawn more in a "look how serious and mature we are" instead of being well integrated with the story) and the overall excessive vulgarity (did they really need to drag the goatfucking and the sibling incest jokes for that long?) I think that it's a bad series even if you don't consider the fact that it's a bad adaptation

[shinakazami1]

New tales Ep 5 live review! I had this in my drafts for so long, I'll finally post. I lost the draft 3 times while playing so some notes are missing or come from memory but yee jshshs

This run was a bad ending one so, a review of the game will happen once I play the good or neutral one, to see how the game was supposed to be played!

- the sequence with Phoung,,, like, I feel narrative would work better if we saw the choices we made in Ep 1? Like, talking about Anu's wrong doings without exactly suggesting them beforehand feels weird, esp since this is whole 'I don't care enough of others'. There was some foreshadowing for Octavio part but not this :/ like sure, it's sad Phuong had the anniversary and Anu forgot but I really wish we were showed that.

- Tediore soldiers are the most entertaining part of this episode istg. I'd even say they're the best part of the game in general as writers can strive at what they wanted - jokes.

- Fran part: Rita was adorable for trying to change (too bad she died sjhsjs) and LOU13 being a cat was amazing 🙀🙀 Bless you toxic yuri

- Mad that the relationship with killing in this game for each character is not stable. But once again, possibly something I'll need to check in good run

- Anu sequence : dear God Rhys made me so happy YOU DONT EVEN KNOW. LIKE I will replay the game and try to get to that part just to record him. He's so adorable 😭😭😭💕💕💕 even Anu can see that

- ouuuu I killed the psycho and I'm SO GLAD FINALLY HAVE ONE ACTION THAT WE ACTUALLY DID IN THIS WHOLE FUCKING THING.

- same with Keeper (tho Anu feeling bad for it, while works for her character, makes it silly since keeper was the one who wanted to kill her,,, but morality is a funny thing so IG it makes sense)

- I realised we lost that cute psycho tho,,, hope she will show up (foreshadowing)

- earlier I was mad about the sequence, it felt too forced. Seeing them mention the device - yeah I sort of see it but not fully nsjshhshsh

- wait the silly guard,,, omg is it the fella OMG IT IS OK HI HI THE CUTE PSYCHO

- free gym membership,,, would i also become a tediore soldier for that... What benefits does Rhys have...

- the fact after everything everything, first interactions siblings have is being mad Octavio shot his leg is beautiful. Siblings siblings siblings

- Fran focusing on mouth to mouth,,,a lot, even,,,, my hypersexual frem,,

- launch joke,, dear God,,,

- I'm a bit... Disappointed? That any arc happened and for now we didn't see a single thing about it, of her learning something or changing. Like why was the first part of episode for Anu there??? It feels pointless. I hope the good run will solve this...

-PUNCH THE DOOR

- I'm really mad

- I am hugging everybody with Fran cus why not djdjdhhd

- ouu tediore fellas letting BROCK do his thing is so cute sjshsh

- "I brought an echodex to a gunfight" HELL YEE GET HIM OCTAVIO

- don't kill the psycho NOOOO SHE WAS SO ADORABLE STAPLEFACE NOOO

- LOU13 IS SO SILLY with hsi timing to tell people what he thinks (tho he before seemed to respect them?) and telling any slay queen

- Googles,,, ouuuu why did Anu not learn enough with the goggles, dear God is it to show some people can stay ass holes,,,

- TIMM-E!! Pull!!

-I'm so mad that they didn't even go to Anu to talk about Stapleface? And like, yeah sure cute yuri but they didn't have much time spent together and idk why the crystal didn't work that time. It only didn't work for metal

- pour Frogurt,,,, dear God I wish this ;; and the punch with the whole ballet sequence fell so hard KSJDJDHEHE

- The shard changing Anu for different is so... Weird. Like it made her better bht now somehow, worse?

- I love tediore soldiers. Again jsjwhshl

- LOU13 NOOO DONT DIE and why did he have neutral expression instead of them using those we sad in that picture in Ep 1 ouuu

- ouuuuu OK ok that did hurt a bit

- ouuuu,,,, l0u13e,,,, no,,

- Susan,,, what the fuck sjehehshey

- Promethea,,,, news reporter,,,

- Dear God the ending feels so,,, hollow jshwhehshwh like the choice feels nonexistent? Also the friend is age

- OCTAVIO PLEASE

- and Susan is so dead inside??? And likes taco?

- gosh how we WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS WHOLE ENDING FIGHT AND STUFF WHY IS THIS SO LONG

- Goggles PLEASE ouuu

-beating Susan up was mostly for me than for anything

- WHY IS OCTAVIO SO DUM DJHSHHS the dancing thing (funny thing but i died 4 times on it jshshs)

- Anu for soemone who hates violence did a lot of it jsshhehe

- I really wished this would have ended cud ultimate battle felt so flat jsjsje

-,,, whatcha mean I saved Promethea, omg are we gonna get the Rhys ending

- ouuuu and how they end up being bicksrry

- Why 1 year later,,,

- bad ending cus I didn't develop Fran-Anu relation

* tho timm e is so cool

Final conclusions after this for now

- the game has good moments. There is some clever writing here and there and if you realise these characters are supposed to be cringe, it gets better. Tediore soldiers were always a steal and Badass Superfan, Brock, and the couple always made me smile when they showed up.

- I also liked L0U13's design and attitude. Some of his one liners were so strong and cool

- Susan was a villain. Certainly a clever and strong woman but also, often seemed to want to prove to the world she could do anything. Fs for her

- I REALLY hope that the weird inconsistencies I've been talking about with killing is my fault in some dialogues. I'll see if I can figure it out in the new run

- I'll write my review on Rhys' character cus I really feel people kept on saying how he's jack 3.0. There are some parts where the writing resembles more jack but I think it's something we can look at from another angle.

[phoenixcatch7]

Just finished bayonetta and honestly it was SO GOOD. FanTASTIC game. Final thoughts:

The final boss fights were both a million times easier than expected but they were over fast enough the hype hadn't had time to run out (and the manic pixie dream girl style bayonetta playlist I had blasting didn't hurt either XD. Hard to be irked when you've got Bling Bling firing at twice speed while you fight a giant hair tentacle lady with face missiles IN SPACE).

Also going in knowing the bayo 2 ending is so much worse because you can see how 500yrs of loptr has just eroded him into a shell of himself ToT. This weapon flailing peacock wearing ash white lunatic is so far from the righteous, devoted warrior who loved his family above all else 😭. He's still wearing his wedding ring!!! And he dotes on tiny cereza whom he never got to hold, but that's it. That's all that's left...

Bayo 2 did the sequel plot twist thing so good, because you can see so much more of loptr in him than balder. The speech rhythm, the weirdly crooning faux polite monologuing, the rippling blue of his eye and outfit despite all his magic (both in this and the next game) being gold?? Yeah!!!

The peacock feathers in his boss fight though,,,,, sooooo pretty. They moved so beautifully, it really had so much elegance and grace, even when I was chopping him up 😍

Him and Jubileus were kinda cheese though. Like, the final Jeanne boss fight was a million times harder and with so much high stakes (having to redo the missile section again). I died like THREE times, and one was because I was curious as to what would happen if I threw Jubileus into a planet (spoiler - she did not in fact take damage but instead shook herself off with an evil grin and one shotted me, boo).

The dance video was so much better than I expected! She moves so fast lmao. There's a lot of repetitive moves but she does it at such speed!! It looks like such a fun dance too lol.

And!! I unlocked the gallery and stuff!!! 100/10 it was an absolute blast to look through and listen to the music, I literally examined every single model and every single piece of concept art. Bayonetta's designs were all amazing but no one told me how feminine every SINGLE character was posed!!! Crying laughing. Everyone had their legs like a meter apart apart from balders 'rich new widow meeting the police at her door' energy.

New drinking game: go through the enemy/demon models and take a shot for every face/human skull you see. It's so creepy lol. Phenomenal character design on all fronts!

Got 10,000 halos for finishing the game and immediately spent it all on the super outfit maker thing. I deserved it!!

Also apparently I got an achievement for using 20 wicked weaves with dodge offset, which is hysterical given I still don't know how to do dodge offset. Still don't know any combos either! It's a miracle I made it this far XD.

The characters are great, even the bosses have little interactions with bayonetta (mostly her cutting them off and shooting them lmao) and the found family energy the bayo/cereza/luka trio had was off the charts, but I'm so glad they didn't go through with it like every male/female leads ever. It has a way of flattening everyone involved :/.

The final cutscene totally happened because bayonetta and Jeanne got together with rodin like 'okay the angels probably think she's actually dead. This is our only chance to do something SO funny' like Enzo and poor luka fully thought she was dead. Jeanne called her nun outfit cosplay. Rodin stole enzos cig and lectured him while he accidentally protected him from falling coffin lids XD. With the intermittent fight scenes in the credits, the dance video, the amount of unlocks I got, what a way to end the game!!

In conclusion - this was definitely a game I'm going to replay and try to 100% (maybe not platinum style, but everything else lol), and it's so obvious how much thought, effort and love was put into it. A masterpiece but also very clearly an older game (the lack of save points and a good place to practice combos, combined with the painfully long chase segments both attest to that). Something I've thoroughly enjoyed every aspect of and something I'm most definitely going to come back to for a while to come.

Kinda want to get bayo 2 now... Do you think they still sell it on cd?