#sobbed hysterically multiple times while writing it as well as when i finished because i was so damn proud

[missingn000]

hey all! i wrote a what-if character study & action fic for if king fought sanji instead of zoro during the raid on onigashima. i'd really love if you gave it a read! thanks so much!

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[avocadogirl216]

Another Winchester?

AN: Hello Everyone! So lately I’ve been wanting to write a winchester x sister!reader and I got this idea. Just know that this is my first ever story that I have shared with anyone else so please let me know of any mistakes or any of your thoughts. Thank you!

Summary: You are the little sister of The infamous Winchester brothers and this is how you meet them. This is set in season six after Sam gets his soul back.

Warnings: Mentions of drinking and drugs,language, mentions of sex, some violence, mention of abusive mother, suicide by overdose, some blood and I think that’s it.

!TRIGGER WARNING! If you are easily triggered by mentions of abuse, suicide or drugs please DO NOT read this.

 Your name is (YN) Anderson. You’re 14 and a hunter. Your mother is Melinda Anderson who is a alcoholic and a drug addict. She was always either high or drunk and no matter what day or time it was. She was unemployed and brought home sketchy men almost every night.  She had an awful temper and the tiniest things would set her off and when she got angry, you didn’t want to be with her.  She would take it out on you and if she was too tired or drunk she would let her one night stands beat you until you were unconscious.  

Let’s just say you weren’t a big fan of her. You’ve tried to run away multiple times but since your mom has many drug dealers and one night stands pretty much everywhere in town you would always get caught.

Your father was John Winchester the infamous hunter. You didn’t know much about him. All that you knew was that he was in the Marines and that his wife, Mary Winchester, died in 1983. From time to time you would daydream about him, wondering what your life would be like if you lived with him instead of your mom.  

John worked a case in that town and after he finished the job he went to a bar got drunk and found your mom. Nine months later you were born.

You met your father when you were seven and there was a pack of werewolves in town that your father was hunting. He found out about you a couple years earlier and was surprised to find out that he had another child. Since he had been close to finding Yellow Eyes he didn’t have time to visit you and since him and Dean were hunting together for most of the time he didn’t want Dean to grow suspicious.

John shot a bullet in the heart of what he thought was the last werewolf he decided to finally go meet you.  He was nervous because he didn’t want anything happening to you considering his job.

He finally pulled up to your house. It was small and a little rundown but he didn’t care. All he cared about was you.

You were watching cartoons on the old TV in the living room when you heard the doorbell ring. Your little head perked up and the sudden noise.  You hopped off of the couch and walked over to the door and opened it only to reveal a man who was tall and muscular.  He looked down at you and started to take in your features.  

You were a spitting image of him except you had your mother’s chin and pale skin. You looked at each other in wonder for a good minute.

“H-hi” you squeaked. You were scared of the man standing at your door, especially since he was so big.

“Hey” John said while he was kneeling down to your height. God she is so small he thought.

“Who are you?” You said with more confidence.

John hesitated before he spoke. “My name is John.”

“What are you doing here?” You spoke while crossing your arms.

“I came to meet you.” He said

“Why?”

“Because...” he said while trying to think of the right words “I’m your father.”

You were surprised and a little confused.

You had a lot of questions. Your father? What was he doing here? Where had he been all your short and terrible life? You squinted your eyes and tilted your head a little.

John knew that you were confused “I know that this is a lot of information to take in and maybe if you get your mother then maybe she can explain things easier then I can.”

You didn’t want to bring you mother into this because then she would get furious at you about opening the door and talking to this man. You were tempted to let him in and talk to him and not caring about what her thoughts were. You knew what the punishment would be if you did that. But you were curious to learn more about this man.

“Mom isn’t home right now but you can come in if you want.”

John looked at you in shock. The way you trusted him to come into your house since you just met him made him worried. He saw how sketchy this town was and he saw some of the people, most importantly the men, on the streets and was nervous about how trusting you were.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah”

“Don’t you think that I might hurt you or something?” He asked.

“No”

“Why is that?”

“Because you have a different look in your eyes then the other guys in this town.” You stated.

She’s smart thought John.

“So do you want to come in or...” you asked.

John hesitated “Uh yeah”

You opened the door for him and John walked in. He observed the place. It was dirty and needed cleaning, badly. You seemed to notice his eyes lingering on a certain spot on the wall.

“Sorry” you said shyly

“For what?”

“Our house is dirty” you said while tears started to form in your eyes.

John noticed this and kneeled down once again and hugged you. “It’s alright” he said. You sniffled and pulled back.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah”

You two moved over to the couch and sat down. Y’all stared to talk and before you knew it, it was dark outside.  

You yawned.

“You tired?” John asked

“Yeah” you said while yawning agian

“Why don’t we put you to bed? Huh?”

“Will you be here tomorrow?” You asked

John sighed “I don’t think I can stay.”

“Why not?” You said sadly

“Because-“ but before he could say anything else the front door crashed opened and 3 men with yellow eyes, long nails and pointed teeth ran in.

You screamed while John hid you behind his back. The wolves surrounded the both of you.

“Well well what do we have here?” The biggest of the three said “The mighty John Winchester with a little girl. How cute.”

John pulled out his gun “How did you find us?”

“It wasn’t too hard. We just followed your scent and it led us to you.” Said another wolf.

“I’m going to enjoy ripping you apart for killing my family” said the biggest wolf.

“And the little girl will just be a bonus” snickered the smallest.

“Ok listen, you can have me just let her go” John said while you were clinging to his legs, shaking like a leaf.

“I don’t think that’s gonna happen” said the second wolf.

Then all of a sudden you screamed as you were ripped from Johns legs by a wolf that came in through the back door.

“No!” Yelled John

You were now crying hysterically. You didn’t know what was happening or who these people were. “Dad!” You screamed holding your arms out to him while struggling to get away from the werewolf holding you.

“Dad?” Said the one holding you “You have another kid?” The werewolf asked as he bent down and smelled you which was startling and made you whimper. Then the wolf stood up to his full height and said “Yep the little rugrat is yours. I can smell your blood in her veins.”

“Please just let her go” John pleaded “I’ll give you anything!”

“Now this doesn’t sound like the big, bad John Winchester that I’ve heard about.” Said the smallest one.

“How about you let her go and then I’ll show you how big and bad I am” John said with a sneer.

“Hmmm that does sound tempting but I have a better idea.” Said the fourth werewolf.

He kneeled and looked at you in the eyes while putting one hand on each shoulder. “This isn’t going to hurt for long” he said while showing you his teeth. You whimpered, still trying to get away from the monster from your nightmares.

Then a gunshot went off behind you which made you scream once again.

John was tackled to the ground by the other two werewolves and his gun slid across the floor hitting the wall to your left.

You were trying to get to him when the wolf that was holding you grabbed you tight and dug is long, sharp nails into your shoulders. You screamed in pain.

John brought out a silver knife and killed the other two wolves. He then tackled the wolf holding you and was on top of him in seconds.

They were fighting and you ran to the nearest corner watching as best that you could with the tears that were in your eyes.

The wolf then punched your dad in the face and flipped them so now he had the upper hand while your dad was struggling underneath him.

You were scared but you wanted to help so you looked over at the gun and picked it up.

You didn’t know how to use a gun but you did know that when you pulled the trigger the bullet would come out. So you pointed it at the monster that was hurting your father and you pulled the trigger.

A load shot rang off the walls and startled you. John then pushed the dead wolf off of him and ran over to you.

“Are you ok?”

You were shaking and confused “WHAT WAS THAT?!”

John sighed and debated on telling you what that really was.

“DAD WERE THOSE THINGS?” You Said sobbing.

He pulled you into a hug and picked you up. He then sat on the couch with you in his lap.

No way I’m getting out of this one John thought. He sighed. The told you everything.

You were terrified and confused.

After a while you fell asleep in Johns lap. He put you to bed, cleaned up the mess and left.

You woke up the next morning looking for your father but he was nowhere to be found.

About a week later a package came in the mail you opened it and it was a journal from him telling you everything you needed to know about how to kill monsters. That was the last time you ever saw your father.

Seven years later

(YN)’s POV

Dammit! 

You just got off of your shift from the towns diner and you were running late to get home.

Mom is going to be so pissed.

Since your Mom didn’t work you had to find a job which was the dishwasher at the local diner. You were surprised that they would hire you considering that you were only 14 but life is full of surprises.

You ran down the street at full speed and took two right turns and one left and there was your house.

You were hoping that your mother wasn’t home but your luck seems to be running out lately because her car was in the driveway.

Crap

You took some deep breaths and walked through the front door.

Something was off. You could feel it. The TV wasn’t on like it normally is or the fresh smell of weed wasn’t was strong as it usually was. But mom could be upstairs with another guy like Ace or James but there was this weird feeling in the pit of your stomach telling you different.

You pulled out your gun loaded with silver bullets and started to go though the house. Downstairs was clean. You slowly start to walk up the stairs to the second floor. She wasn’t in the bathroom or your bedroom. You took the risk of checking her room.  

You opened the door and you found her on the floor. Unmoving.

You walk over see a empty pill bottle in one hand and half a bottle of Jack Daniels in the other.

She still hasn’t moved.

You bent down slowly and checked her pulse.

Nothing.

Your mother was dead.

Dean’s POV

“I don’t know man. There isn’t any activity out there.” Said Sam

“Well I guess that we got lucky then.” Dean said as he looked over at his brother.

Sam scoffed “Dean I’m fine. I don’t remember anything about being soulless or anything about hell. So you can stop worrying about me.”

“I’m sorry have you met me?” Dean said “ I just want you to be careful and not having any activity is good because people are safe and you have less of a chance of your wall breaking and leaving you a drooling mess on the floor.”

Sam rolled his eyes “Yeah, whatever”

Dean returned is concentration to the road. He was actually glad that he could have a day off and hopefully he could stop thinking about the world ending crap that was hanging over their heads.

Another hour passed then there was a vibration coming from the glove department.

“What’s that?” Asked Dean

“I think its one of dad’s old phones.” Said Sam while he was opening the glove department. He searched through the clutter until he found the phone.

He answered it.

“Hello?” Sam Said

“Hello is this John Winchester?” Said a woman on the other end with an annoying high pitched voice.

Sam look over at Dean.

What? Dean mouthed

They’re asking for Dad. Sam mouthed back.

What do they want? 

I don’t know 

“Sir are you still there?” Said the annoying woman on the phone.

“Yeah I’m still here.”

“Is this John Winchester?” She asked again.

“Umm... no this isn’t him.” Said Sam. Dean then took the phone out of his brothers hand and started to talk.

“Why do you need him?” Asked Dean

“Sorry sir I cannot tell you unless you are John Winchester or a relative” said the woman.

“I’m his son. Now who are you and why do you need my father?” Dean said angrily.

“Apologies. My name is Cindy with Bay Area Adoption Services in Mountain View, California.  I am calling regarding John Winchester’s daughter.”

Daughter?

“Umm last time I checked my father doesn’t have another kid.” Said Dean.

“Well he does. His name is on her birth certificate and there was a DNA test done when she was born and this was the only number listed to get in contact with him.”

Dean was confused. Dad had a daughter? He had a little sister? Why didn’t he tell me about her?

“Why do you need him? Did something happen?” Dean asked.

“Yes something happened but I cannot discuss that over the phone since I have no identification on who you are. If you want to talk about the situation then we are going to have to meet up.”

“Umm ok. Where do you want to meet up at?”

“Bay Area Adoption Services in Mountain View, California” Said Cindy

They were in Nevada which was about 11 hours until Mountain View.

“What time?”

...

“I can’t believe we are doing this.” Said Dean. He was starting to have second thoughts.

“Hey it’s our sister. It doesn’t hurt to be curious.” Said Sam

“Yeah but what if she is like Adam? Huh? What then?”

“What if she’s not?” Argued Sam

“Well-“ Dean was interrupted by Cindy walking through the door.

“Hello! You much be the Winchester brothers! It’s so nice to meet you!” Cindy Said.

God her voice is worse in person. Thought Dean.

“Yup that’s us.” Sam Said

“So I’ve gone over your identifications and you seem to fit the profiles.” Cindy Said too enthusiastically.

“Good” Said Dean

“So I’m thinking that you would like to know some things about your sister.”

“Yeah” Dean said

“Well (YN) is 14 and a straight A student in all honors classes. She is actually in a grade higher than she should be. She is a little shy but who can blame her for everything she’s been through.”

“Wait. Everything she’s been through?” Asked Dean

“Well she didn’t have a father figure in life and her mother was a alcoholic and a drug addict who was also abusive.  Since her mother was unemployed, (YN) had to work two jobs after school and on the weekends. So her life hasn’t been easy.”

“She was abused? Why didn’t you do anything about it?” Asked Sam

“Believe me we tried.” Said Cindy “But every time we went to inspect, her mother would hide things, so we had nothing to report. But we could tell after the incident that (YN) was a little relieved that she wasn’t around her anymore.”

“The incident?” Asked Dean

“(YN) came home from working at the local diner to find her mother dead on the floor.”

Sam and Dean shared a look.

“How exactly did her mother die?” Asked Sam

“Overdose on sleeping pills and alcohol.” Cindy stated. “Why?”

“Just curious” Said Dean

Poor kid 

“Okay... well would you like to meet (YN)?”

Cindy Asked.

“Why not” Dean Said with a slightly fake smile.

“Let me go get her.” Said Cindy happily.

(YN)’s POV

They pulled you out of breakfast to talk to someone who might be willing to adopt you. You’ve been here for three days now and all you wanted was to get the hell out of there. Lately you’ve been planning to get out and your pretty close to a almost foul proof plan.

Cindy took you into a room with 4 chairs and a table in the middle. It looked like an interrogation room. There were also two men. One was really tall with long, shaggy hair with puppy dog eyes. The other was slightly shorter with short, spiky hair and apple green eyes. Both were muscled and intimidating to you, considering that you were only 5’1.

“I’ll leave you three to talk to each other.” Cindy Said in her annoyingly high pitched voice.

She closed the door and there was an awkward silence that followed.

You walked over to the table and sat down in front of the two of them.  You stared at each other for a little while when the taller one that reminds you of a moose decided to break the ice.

“Hi. I’m Sam and this is my brother Dean.” He Said as he held out his hand for you to shake.

“Umm hi. I’m (YN)” you said quietly, taking Sam’s hand.

You looked over at Dean to see if his hand was out to shake but it wasn’t so you just put your hand in your lap.

An awkward silence followed. “So...” you said trying release the tension in the room.

“So...” Said Dean

“Umm So where did you guys come from?” You Asked

“Northern Nevada” Sam said

“Huh. Isn’t that like 11 hours away or something?” You asked

“Yup” Dean said flatly. He looked bored. Like he didn’t want to be here but honestly neither did you.

A moment of silence followed. You kept looking around the room while wringing your hands, trying to think of a way to either break the silence or get out of there.

While you were looking around your necklace fell out of the collar of your shirt which had an anti possession symbol on it.

“What’s that?” Dean said pointing to your necklace.

You looked down and saw the necklace. “Oh umm it’s a charm that prevents possession.” You Said. Wow real smooth (YN). Now they might think that you worship Satan or something.

“Possession? Like demonic or...?” Dean questioned.

“Well yeah.” You Said.

“Huh. You believe that stuff?” Dean asked skeptically.

You looked at him in the eye. “Call me superstitious.”

Sam and Dean looked at you curiously.

These two know a lot more than they were letting on. The way that they looked at you and the way that Dean asked questions, they probably knew a thing or two about the supernatural world. You were going to ask them if they believed in the supernatural but the door suddenly opened and in walked Cindy “Well now that you’ve learned a little bit about each other I hope that the brothers have come to a conclusion.” She said hopefully while looking between you and the brothers.

“Umm...well... could we talk to you in private please:” Sam Said

“Of course! (YN) could you please come with me?”

“Yeah, sure” you said. You wanted to get out of there more than anything. You gave one last look over to the mysterious brothers who are supposedly from Nevada and you walked out.

Cindy took you to your temporary room and closed the door behind you.

Something was off about those two. I can feel it. I don’t want to stick around and find out. You decided to put your plan into action. You grabbed your backpack with your clothes, money and hunting supplies then opened your window. You were on the third floor so jumping wasn’t an option. You looked on both sides of the building noticing a fire escape a couple of feet away. The only way to get to that was to walk on the tiny ledge on the side of the building that couldn’t have been more than a foot wide. So your options were you could either go with those mysterious men who were demons or god knows what or walk down this ledge and more than likely fall and break a couple of bones. 

No competition.

You carefully put your foot on the ledge and grabbed onto the side of the building as best as you could. You started to shuffle over to carefully.  There was a large gust of wind that nearly made you topple over the edge but you quickly grabbed onto the edge of the fire escape. Breathing in a sigh of relief, you put one leg over the rail of the escape, then the other. You started to climb down the ladder until you reached the ground.

You ran down the alley and never looked back at the adoption center.

Deans POV

Cindy came back 3 minutes later.

“So have you boys come to a decision?” Cindy asked.

“Well...(YN) seems like a good kid but-” Sam tried to say but Dean interrupted him “Is there a way that we can wait on the adoption? So that we can have some time to think about this?” Sam gave is brother a look saying what are you doing?

“Of course. I can give you 24 hours to think this over. I understand your hesitation considering that adoption is a huge step in both yours and (YN)’s life.”

“Great. See you in 24 hours.” Dean said while walking out of the room.

Once the brothers were outside and in Baby, Sam had a million questions for his brother.

“What the hell Dean?”

“What?”

“You’re not seriously considering this, are you?” 

“Why not?” Dean asked

“Dean you know that this life isn’t for a kid, especially one who has barley lived their life.” Sam argued.

“Don’t you think that I know that? I’m not stupid Sam, I know how dangerous this life is, but you saw her necklace and she knew exactly what it represented. Maybe she already hunts.”

“Are you nuts Dean? She’s only 14. How could she hunt? With a fake badge? We both know that no one would buy that and not to mention that she didn’t have that look to her.”

“What look?”

“The look that every hunter has, the look of not having hope and the look of lose and pain.”

“That doesn’t mean anything. I think that she already knows about whats really in the dark and she more than likely knows how to kill almost every evil son of bitch that’s out there.” Dean said.

“We need proof Dean.” Sam said with a hint of annoyance.

“I know that. I’m still not even 100% about this yet but how about this, if we can’t find any proof in the next 24 hours then we drop it and let (YN) have a normal life and get adopted by a soccer mom or something, but if we do find any proof then we can take her and help her.  After all she is Dad’s kid, so if any monsters find out about that then we have to protect her. Deal?” Dean offered.

Sam sighed and looked out the window for a good minute before answering. “Deal”

(YN)’s  POV

You walked to the bus station and opened the door.  There weren’t that many people in there. There was a married couple arguing with the ticket agent about a refund, there was a frazzled mother and her crying child at the vending machines and there was a homeless man who was very dirty and sitting at one of the many benches.

You walked over to one of the counters to a ticket agent who looked bored and annoyed.  “Can I help you?” He said flatly. 

“Umm yeah I was hoping to buy a bus ticket.” You said

“Doesn’t everyone.” Said the man “And aren’t you a little young to be buying a bus ticket by yourself?”

You pulled out your wallet and handed the man a 20. “I don’t have to be.” You said.

The agent perked up and immediately took the money with a little too much force.  “Where to?”

“Whats your furthest route?” You asked.

“Hmm lemme see.” The man said while looking at his computer.  After about half a minute of listening to the man type he answered “Aspen, Colorado.”

“Perfect. How much?” 

“About $400.” 

Your mouth dropped open but you gotta do what you gotta do “Okay” You said while handing him the money. He counted the money out loud and when he was satisfied he pushed a button on the keyboard and a ticket printed out. He handed you the ticket. “The bus leaves here in about 5 hours.”

“Okay, thank you.” You stared to walk out but something crossed your mind. You need to cover your tracks because CPS will be looking for you and they would more than likely come here. So you turned around and walked back to the counter and pulled out a 50 and handed it to the man. “If anybody comes in here asking for me, tell them that I went to Southern California.”

The man gave you a look but took the money. “You betcha.”

You walked out of the building and you put the ticket into your left jacket pocket. You had time to kill and on your way here you saw a small diner. So you started to make your way to the diner.

...

You took a seat  at the back of the diner and sat in a chair facing away from the door. You ordered a bacon cheeseburger with extra fries and extra bacon with a cherry coke. While you were waiting for your food you heard a rumble of a car. You turned around and saw a beautiful black ‘67 Chevy Impala pulling into a parking spot.

Damn what I would kill to have that car

While you were admiring the car you didn’t see who was driving it.  When both of the front doors swung open the two men from the adoption center walked out and shut the doors.

Crap. What are they doing here?

You turned around and put on your hood on to cover your face.

I can’t leave now, they would notice me.

You tried to think of any escape routes other than the front door. The back door from the kitchen might work if you didn’t get caught which is a pretty big if. There might be a window in the bathroom but if there wasn’t then you would have to walk out and risk them seeing your face. You were trapped.

The bell above the door rung and Sam and Dean walked in and sat down at one of the tables in the middle. You moved your hair to try to cover your face more.

“What are you two fellas gonna get?” The waitress, Kacey, asked.

“I’ll have a bacon cheeseburger with extra bacon and extra fries while my brother here will have a salad with extra tomatoes.”

“Ok. I’ll get that right out.” Kacey said in a cheery voice.

After a couple of minutes of listening to Sam and Dean argue about who was better, Jet Li or Chuck Norris, Kacey brought out your order.

“Would you like to have any condiments with that?΅

“Umm, some ketchup please.” You said quietly trying not to be heard by the brothers.

“Okay! Be out in a shake!” Kacey said while walking back to the kitchen.

Deans phone rang and he answered it. After another minute of waiting, Kacey walked out with the ketchup. She placed the bottle on the table and walked away. You put some by your fries and on your burger. When you were done you screwed the lid back on it and placed it on the edge of the table. Dean hung up the call and started to talk quietly with Sam. You reached for your drink and your arm bumped into the bottle which made it topple over the edge of the table. It broke with a crash.

Of course it had to be a glass bottle.

Everyone in the tiny diner looked at where the noise came from and looked straight at you. You looked up and saw the brothers staring at you. 

Uh oh

They shared a look, stood up and walked over to your table.

Crap what do I do?

They stood at the end of your table and stared down at you.

“Well hello (YN). Fancy meeting you here.” Dean said.

You tried to play it off cool. “I know. Isn’t it a small world?” You said with a nervous chuckle.

Dean crossed his arms while Sam arched is eyebrow.

“What are you doing here?” Sam asked while taking a seat across from you. Dean followed suit.

“Umm...eating?”

“Cute. He means why are you here instead of the adoption center?” Dean said

“Well... I went on a walk and got hungry and then I came here.” You said while scratching the back of your neck.

“Huh” Sam said, not buying a word you were saying,“Some walk. Considering that the adoption center just called us saying that you were missing.” Sam said.

You didn’t know what do say so you just looked down at your hands in your lap.

“Are you running away?” Dean asked

You looked back up at them. “If you want to call it that.”

“Why?” Dean asked while looking in your eyes.

“Because I don’t want to stick around here and I don’t want to get adopted.”

“Why not?” Sam asked while looking at you with his puppy eyes.

“Because I have very bad luck that follows me wherever I go. Believe me I’m saving you the trouble.” You said while popping a fry in your mouth.

“Bad luck like...” Sam pried

“Bad luck like getting people hurt or worse.” You said a little agitated.

“Is this about your mom?” Dean asked

You tensed when he said the word mom.

“No”

The brothers noticed you tense. “Are you sure?” Sam asked.

You let out an angry sigh “This has nothing to do with my mom. I hated her and I know what you are gonna say ‘Oh your just overreacting’ or some crap like that but I did and I still do.  She was a selfish bitch who only cared about drinking, drugs and sex. So could you please drop it.” You now had tears spilling down your face and you avoided eye contact with Sam and Dean.

Silence followed for about a minute then you wiped your face and got your self situated. “I’m sorry. I-I didn’t mean to blow up like that.”

“Hey its okay. Its understandable.” Sam said

You sniffled.

More awkward silence followed. You wanted to break the silence so you asked them a question. “So I’m just wondering, why did you guys come from Nevada for me?”

“Well we got a phone call from the agency telling us about you.” Dean said

“Why? Were you guys looking for someone to adopt or what?” You asked

Sam and Dean looked at each other then Dean spoke. “No but they were looking for our dad.”

“Why would they be looking for your dad?”

The brothers were quiet for a little bit, trying to find the right words.

“Who are you people?” You asked

“We told you.” Dean said

“Yeah you told me your first names and that’s it.”

Dean sighed “My name is Dean Winchester and this is my brother Sam.”

“Winchester? Like John Winchester?” You asked

“You know him?” Dean asked

“Well yeah. He’s my dad.” You said it like it was obvious.

“Well... he’s our dad too.” Sam said

“What?!” You said. Dad had other kids? I had brothers?

“Hold on. Have you even met dad before?” Dean asked

“Once. About seven years ago.”

“What happened?”

You went quiet. “You wouldn’t believe me.”

“Try us” Sam said

You sighed. “I was seven and it was a normal day. Mom was out and I was home alone when the doorbell rang. I went to answer it and there stood Dad. We talked and hung out all day and when it was night I was ready to go to bed when...” you stopped yourself. If you told them what really happened then they would think that you are crazy.

“When what?” Dean asked

“When the door was kicked in and some... werewolves broke in.” You looked up at your brothers and they were staring at you.

“I told you that you wouldn’t believe me.”

“We never said we didn’t” Sam said calmly “What happened after that?”

You took a deep breath “Then they surrounded us while Dad got a gun out. The wolves were talking about how he didn’t seem to live up to his reputation. One snuck in and grabbed me from Dad.  It nearly bit me when dad killed the others and tackled the one who was holding me.  I saw his gun on the floor. picked it up and killed it. Then Dad told me about everything.”

Sam and Dean were quiet. 

“Then what happened?” Sam asked

“I woke up the next morning and he was gone. A week later he sent this in the mail.” You dug around in your bag when you finally found the old, leather bound journal that he sent to you all those years ago.

“This has taught me everything I know about hunting.” You said as you handed your brothers the journal.

Dean took it and flipped through the pages. “It’s in his handwriting.” He said to Sam.

Sam then took it from his brother and did the same as Dean. He handed it back to you.

Sam spoke “We have one like it.” He signaled Dean to get it out. Dean gave you a wary look but got it out and handed it to you. 

It looked just like yours but thicker and more worn.

“May I?” You asked

Dean and Sam nodded.

You flipped it open. You were hit with the smell of whiskey and ink. You flipped through the pages when a picture fell out. You picked it up and observed it. It was of a woman with a bright smile and blond hair hugging a little boy whose face was full of freckles and had bright green eyes.

You looked up at Dean and asked him “Is this you and your mom?”

“Yeah” He said with a hint of sadness

“She’s pretty.” You said as you handed him the photo and the journal.

“Thanks” He said.

“So, you hunt?” Sam said

“Yeah I do. Mostly ghosts and demons but there’s been a pack of werewolves or vamps here and there. I killed a ghoul and a witch once. That wasn’t very fun.” You told them.

They looked at you like you just grew two heads.

“By yourself?” Dean asked in shock.

“Yeah”

“But your only 14.” Sam said with the same amount of shock as his brother.

“And? Age is just a number. I know how to work a gun and I know how to kick some ass.” You said in a proud voice.

“When did you actually start to hunt?” Dean asked in a big brother voice.

“When I was 10. When I was younger I found cases and sent them to local hunters and now I hunt with cases that are near me.” You told them.

Dean shook his head while Sam’s mouth hung open.

“And another thing. How do I know if you are legit? You could be a ghoul or a shifter for all I know.”

Sam and Dean gave you a look but held out their arms for you to test. You looked around to make sure that no one was watching when you pulled out a small pocket knife made of silver and cut them both with it. When their skin didn’t sizzle you got out a flask that had a cross on the outside of it and poured it onto their skin. 

“Okay. Your turn.” Dean said.

You held out your arm and he did the same to you. When you were all satisfied you spoke. “Sorry I meant to do that earlier but I didn’t want you to think that I was trying to kill you or something.”

“We understand. It doesn’t hurt to be too careful.” Sam said with a smile.

Some time passed with silence.

“So what now?” You asked your brothers.

“What do you mean?” Dean asked

“Well I have two options. Option one is to take this bus ticket-” you pulled out the bus ticket you bought earlier “- or I could go with you guys.”

Sam and Dean looked at each other and had a silent conversation. 

“Look, I know that is a lot to ask of you guys. I mean your the infamous Winchester brothers who saved the world. You always have a world ending crisis on your plates and I get if this is too much. I can go on my way and if you like, we don’t have to talk to each other again. It’s your choice.”

They both looked at you like you were crazy.

“Would you quit hunting if you went on your own?” Dean asked

“No” You said

“Why not?” Sam asked

“Because you can’t just leave the hunting life. You can run and hide all you want but it will catch up to you. So I might as well embrace my future rather than fight it and get hurt.”

You had a point. Both Sam and Dean have tried to live normal lives but it didn’t work out and they didn’t want you to go through that pain that they went through. Although they didn’t want you to go through the pain of the hunting life, you had them to protect you. That much they knew.

After a while of thinking Dean stood up and Sam followed suit. They started to walk to the front of the diner. Dean turned around and said “You coming or not kid?”

A smile grew on your face. You grabbed your backpack and slung it over your shoulder while you threw some cash on the table and you walked towards your brothers.

Sam opened the back door of the impala for you and you slid in. Both brothers got in the front seat and Dean turned the key in the ignition which made the engine roar a beautiful sound. 

You pulled onto the highway that lead you down your new life and destiny.

The End

(Sorry if this sucked. It was my first story)

[littlecarowrites]

~ Hold My Hand ~

Request: Jim Kirk, your boyfriend, teaching you to slow dance at a party. - Anon

Words: 2897

Warnings: None really, a little bit of tears and angst maybe, but the rest is hopefully fluff!

Beta'd: Again by the lovely @yourtropegirl! I'm sure all who follow me also follow her, but if you're not following her... go do it! She's lovely and kind and really, really nice!

A/N: I'M SO SORRY NONNIE! I have no idea why it took me so long, but I deleted this story at least 10 times before I found a beginning that I liked. And I'm also really sorry that the part of the actual dancing (or learning at least) was cut short, I just am a person with two left feet, so I kinda went with my own experience here (I did google how to teach slow dancing, but that didn't really help me, because I had no idea how to turn what I saw into words, so I hope you're not too mad at me!).

Tags (requested for this fic): @musingsongbird, @cookieoffortune 

“Ambassador Y/L/N?“

You put the little girl you had in your arms down on the ground and nudged her softly, pushing her in the direction of her friends and siblings, who were running around a little bit further down the path.

“Yes?,” you said, straightening yourself up and turning around to face the man who had spoken.

“I have a message for you. It's from Yorktown.”

“Thank you”, you whispered, smiled weakly and took the letter with a trembling hand from the Vulcan. He just bowed a little and disappeared between some houses, his tunic floating in the wind.

As you pondered over the decision to open the letter or not, you walked down the path to the little cottage you called your home, at the border of the capital while you were on New Vulcan. Of course you had heard of the events in Yorktown and about the destruction of the Enterprise during the rescue mission of that alien's crew, so you knew that the letter would come sooner or later.

The moment you walked through the door you slumped down to the floor, your body shaking and tears flowing. Not only had you lost your good friend Ambassador Spock some time ago, now you had to live with the knowledge that your boyfriend and his crew had passed away too.

Sobbing you ripped open the envelope, not caring for the multiple expressions of compassion and condolences of Starfleet, you just needed to know if you were invited to a funeral or not.

There were no words to describe your surprise, as you wiped the tears away and saw that the letter wasn't written by Commodore Paris of Yorktown, but was signed by Spock and Bones.

'Dear Y/N, I hope those green-blooded hobgoblins aren't straining your patience too much. I still don't understand how you can be so 'fascinated' by them. Anyways, I don't know how much you know about the events of Yorktown, but be aware that we all survived, even the annoying first officer.'

You chuckled, because even through his writing you could hear Bones's grumpy southern accent. The writing changed after those sentences.

'What the doctor is trying to say ambassador, is, that we all miss you, but logically the captain misses you the most. As a celebration for the construction of the new starship ‘USS Enterprise (NCC-1701-A)’ the Starfleet will be hosting a party in Yorktown. And we want to invite you and ask you to finally stop Jim's god damn whining. It's getting annoying, even more annoying compared to the rest of his dumb ideas. Just, don't tell him. We don't want to hear him boasting about your appearance either.'

You sighed amused and thought about how the two men tried to write a letter together. Needless to say that you were more than impressed that they had managed to do it.

'Commodore Paris was kind enough to send a ship out to get you. It should arrive shortly after this message gets to you. Live long and prosper.'

As soon as you finished reading the letter, someone knocked at the door. “Ambassador Y/L/N? We are here to escort you to Yorktown!“

“I'll be right there! Just one moment, please!“ And with that you stood up with a new found joy and ran to the bathroom to wash away the rest of the tears.

x–x

Nyota had waited for you beside the landing field and escorted you immediately to her quarters, where she had helped you change into your dress and did your makeup and hair. There hadn’t been much time for catching up, but you both were really glad to see and talk to each other again, but of course you lost her shortly after you had entered the big ballroom together.

There were already some drunk men and hysterically laughing women crowding the standing tables all around the room. You brushed non-existent crinkles out of your dress, not because you felt uncomfortable in your skin, but because you weren't used to wearing something so fancy.

“Wow... it's been a long time since I was at a party. Vulcan's aren't really dancers or party throwers, but I think you know that“, you said to her, nodding in the direction of her boyfriend Spock.

“I'll teach him our ways, he won't have any other choice,“ she teased him, even if he couldn't hear her.

You laughed heartily, imagining a stiff Spock dancing with Nyota, as you let your gaze wander through the room, searching for someone special. "Hey, do you know if Jim's al-... Nyota?“ Confused you turned around, only to discover, that Nyota was in fact not standing beside you anymore.

“What? How? I didn't even hear her leave...” you mumbled to yourself and started searching for her, squeezing yourself through the mass of people looking out for a familiar face. Only, you never got far. “Uff!”

“Oh my God! I'm sorry Miss! Did I stand on your foot? That was not my intention! How about we dance together and you can payback by stepping on my foot?”

You giggled but shook your head nevertheless. “I'm sorry sweetheart, but I don't hurt other people intentionally.”

You left him before he could say another word and your eyes locked on to the bar. Finally! You could use a drink and a little snack. With a big sigh you sat down on one of the small bar stools and asked for a water.

“Only a water? What, are you trying to stay loyal to someone and not let yourself fall into temptation? I mean, you’re not wrong, there are some pretty handsome men walking around tonight. Me of course included.”

You stayed silent, not bothering to turn around and face the man that had just sat beside you.

“I'm sorry, that was stupid. It's just... I saw you here, all alone. Don't you want to dance?”

“Thinking about it… yeah, I actually think do want to!,” you huffed out sarcastically. “Barkeeper, make it a shot. Or no wait, make it two. One for me and one for the lovely man here. I'll need the alcohol to make his face look pretty and he'll need something to numb his pain for when I stand on his foot later on. You see”, you turned around, pushing the glass of water the barkeeper had just placed there moments ago out of your way, “I can't dance.”

“How come a beautiful woman like yourself can't dance?”

You just shook your head, following the movements of the barkeeper with your eyes as he slided you your shot, your gaze then staying on the glass. “I probably never found the right partner. Or well... He was never there to dance with me.” And in one swift motion you drowned the shot.

“Well, it wasn’t solely my fault! It wasn’t like you were there either for us to try. I wasn't the one who run away to play ambassador on New Vulcan,” he argued.

You sighed and looked up into the face of your boyfriend. His blue eyes were as dark as the deep ocean, filled with emotions that were swimming around like little fishes. His cheeks were glistening with tears, his lips were twisted into a sad smile and he let out a breathy laugh.

“I'm sorry. I just... It's been so long since I last saw you. I missed you so much and when we crashed on Altamid. I cou... I couldn't shake the thought of you moving on with a Vulcan”, he apologized.

Now it was your turn to get teary eyed and even though you could detect a hint of a joke behind his words, you knew how he felt, because you had felt the same. There were many nights that you spent awake on New Vulcan thinking about him.

You stood up from the bar stool and pulled his tall frame into your small one, pressing your head into his chest and inhaling the scent of his cologne, the cologne you had given him as a gift before he left on his five year mission, a scent that always reminded him of home. He buried his face into the crook of your neck and started to press fleeting little kisses into your skin, sending shivers down your back.

“I missed you so much,” he hummed against your skin, while shaking slightly and you felt tears falling onto your shoulders.

“And I you”, you said and pushed yourself out of his embrace, just to wrap your arms around his neck and press your lips to his. It had been three years after all, since you were in his arms, felt his warmth and were able to kiss him like this.

“I was so afraid... I... I broke down when I got that letter from Starfleet, when they told me the Enterprise had been destroyed. I thought I had lost you and that I'd never see you again,” you said, crying and shaking now too.

“I gave you a promise. I told you I'll always come back to you and I'll always hold to that promise. I was so glad that you went to New Vulcan, even if it meant that I wouldn't be able to see you as much, if I survived the alien attack, because I knew that you were safe. During that time I even thought about retiring when we got back and going to live with you on New Vulcan.”

That statement made you chuckle. “That would have been bad for both of us. I know how much you love your job. And even though you can stand Spock, you wouldn't like it on Vulcan. There aren’t enough rules that can be broken.”

“There are too many rules that can be broken,” he corrected you and pressed a quick kiss to your lips.

“You know what I mean… You wouldn’t see the light of day anymore, sitting there in your own private prison cell.”

You both stayed there for a few moments after that, enjoying the feeling and soaking in each others presence, forehead to forehead with closed eyes.

“Did you know that I was going to be here? Or did you just flirt with every woman you saw and by hazard I was your next target?”

He laughed. “Bones came to me and told me he had an early birthday present for me.” He held up your necklace that he had given you three years ago. In the medallion were two pictures. One of you and him and one of the whole crew, so it would remind you each time you looked at it, that you were in his and their hearts.

Your hands shot to your neck and for the first time that night you felt that the cold and heavy metal of the necklace was missing. “That doctor and his damn hands.”

Jim gestured for you to turn around and when you did he brushed your hair to the side and put your necklace around your neck again. Then, when you heard the faint 'click' of the closure, you felt his lips kissing along the new scar you had on your upper shoulder.

“I’ve had my own fair shares of accidents. You're not the only one who attracts chaos,” you smiled back over your shoulder at his questioning look.

“And this is an old classic for all the love birds tonight, it's called 'All of Me'. Enjoy!,” the DJ said through the microphone.

What would I do without your smart mouth? Drawing me in, and you kicking me out You've got my head spinning, no kidding, I can't pin you down

Jim turned you around to face him again and grabbed your hand. “Come on, let's dance!”

“No, I wasn't kidding Jim! I really can't dance.”

“I'll teach you!”

“I don't know. We could do something else since we haven't seen each other in so long,” you whispered into his ear as you leaned closer, hopefully sounding intriguing and pulled at his suit, smirking.

He shook his head. “No, come on!” He pulled you into the middle of the crowd on the dance floor, holding on to your waist and started to sway you both to the music.

How many times do I have to tell you Even when you're crying you're beautiful too

“Jim, see? I can't dance. I have no rhythm and all the other things you need for it.”

“Stand on my feet then.”

“You know that that only works in movies, right? I'm heavy! I’m an adult and I’m wearing High Heels! I really don't want to break or hurt your feet!”

“Come on Y/N! Just do it!”

“Fine,” you sighed in defeat and stepped carefully on his feet, trying to lay all your weight on your toes, so that your pointy heels wouldn't pierce through Jim's shoes.

He started to dance with your feet on his and it worked. You tried to focus on what he was doing, tried to memorize his steps and find the rhythm and pace in them. 1, 2, 3. 1, 2, 3. You knew that was the pace of a Waltz, you had seen it multiple times in movies. So you tried really hard to understand how his movements worked with the music, you didn’t want to let him down.

'Cause all of me Loves all of you Love your curves and all your edges All your perfect imperfections

“You know,” Jim murmured after a while, when you had given up trying to learn the moves and just let him dance, “it would help if you'd actually tried to learn something from my moves and not just stare into my eyes.” And with that he lifted you down from his feet to the ground again, held you tighter around the waist, grabbed one of your hands, put it on his shoulder and then grabbed the other one and held it to the side.

Cards on the table, we're both showing hearts Risking it all, though it's hard

You pouted. “But I've missed them. Looking at the ocean and the sky reminded me of them and now both of those things seem utterly dull and bland compared to your beautiful baby blues.”

You're my end and my beginning Even when I lose I'm winning 'Cause I give you all of me And you give me all of you

x-x

“It's impossible to teach me how to dance! I have two left feet!,” you laughed, as Jim tried to show you how to do a twirl for the fourth time already. But instead of twirling under his arm, you only managed to bump rather ungracefully into his chest all the time. “Let’s blame it on the shoes!”

“But you need to be able to dance!”, he said, sounding rather desperate.

“Why? For what?,” you giggled at his outburst. “We can just sway softly to the music.”

I can hear the bells, well, don't you hear 'em chime? Can't you feel my heartbeat keeping perfect time?

“Well... I think it's custom for a newly wedded pair to share the first dance after their wedding. And we can't do that, if you can't dance.”

Everybody says that a girl who looks like me Can't win his love, well, just wait and see 'Cause I can hear the bells, just hear them chiming I can hear the bells, my temperature's climbing

Surprised you almost stumble over your feet, but Jim caught you in time and dipped you to make the mistake less visible. Still overwhelmed you pushed the hair out of your face when Jim pulled you back up and opened you mouth and closed it again, trying to process what you just heard. “W... what?”

Round four, he'll ask me for my hand And then round five, we'll book the wedding band So by round six, Amber, much to your surprise This heavyweight champion takes the prize

“Dear Y/N Y/M/N Y/L/N.” As Jim sank to his knees right there on the dance floor your hands flew to your mouth and you realized that everybody was staring at you both. Even the music stopped and all you could hear was your heartbeat and his breathing.

“Being stranded on Altamid and not knowing if I would ever see you again, not knowing what you are doing and not being able to send you my normal 'Don't you dare look at another guy, good night sweety'-message, made me think. We may not always be together in flesh, but I want us to be together in heart and mind. I want to know that you want me just as much as I want you and that I don't need to worry about another man that could grab you to dance-”

“DAMN IT, MAN! Just ask her already!,” an angry doctor could be heard from somewhere, probably the bar.

Jim glared at Leonard who suddenly appeared with a ring in his hand, so he wasn’t at the bar after all, but before Jim could say something else or take the ring from him, you threw yourself around his neck and kissed him passionately, nodding while tears streamed down your cheeks. “YES!”

Listen, I can hear the bells (We can hear the bells) I can hear the bells (We can hear the bells) I can hear the bells

[mercyimagines-blog]

New York, New York

Requested by anonymous: I LOVE YOUR WRITING!!! Can you do one where shawn finished a concert, on his way to a plane to go to you and he get in a car accident. After months in coma he wakes up and your still there waiting for him even if a lot of people told you to move on?

Note: tears, just tears and it’s super long so prepare yourselves

-

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 11; 7:37 PM EST

This was not happening.

You were not going to let this happen.

Everyone was silent.

And then you lost it.

“Are you kidding me?! You totally cheated!” You laugh, lightly kicking your younger brother.

“Pay up.” Noah smirks and you roll your eyes, giving him the twenty dollars you bet him.

“Want some more pizza?” You ask, standing and opening the lid to the pizza box, taking your phone out of your back pocket.

“Nah, I’m full.” Noah says and you don’t answer, noticing that Shawn had called and left a voicemail.

Raising your phone up to your ear, you listened quietly.

“Hey baby, I wanted to let you know that I’m headed to the airport right now. I’m on my way home to you, can’t wait to see you, shit. I miss you like crazy and I can’t wait to hug you, I love you. Give me a call back. See you soon.”

The message ends and you look at your phone, noting that he left the message around an hour ago - meaning he would probably be on the plane, or at the airport with his team, at least.

However, you still press the phone icon and listen to it as it rings, hoping you’ll hear his voice.

“This is Shawn, I’m not available right now. Leave me a message.”

You hang up, thinking he’s already on the plane and headed his way towards you.

9:37 PM

You stifle a yawn as you take a seat on the couch, feeling as sleep makes your eyes droop. Although, when your cell phone rings, you are wide awake - hoping it’s Shawn, saying he’s outside.

As you looked at the caller ID, though, it wasn’t Shawn who was calling you; Karen’s name came up on your screen.

“Hi, Karen.” You say, smiling slightly.

It was then when you heard the panic in her voice.

It was then when you listened to her sob as she struggled to get words out.

It was then when she asked you to pack a bag, everyone was going to New York.

It was then when she told you Shawn had been in an accident.

It was bad.  

You rush to get things into a backpack, not needing much as your mind was racing and tears were threatening to spill over onto your cheeks.

How could this be happening?

Shawn didn’t deserve this, any of it.

He deserved everything good in life, not to almost be taken from it.

11:30 PM

You held Aaliyah’s shaking hand as Karen and Manny led the way into NewYork-Presbyterian, trying to find their son.

Karen was just as distraught as she looked and you could tell that Manny was trying to hold everything together - because that’s who he was as a person.

John and Geoff walked out of a hall and they noticed all four of you immediately, Karen profusely asking where her son was.

It seemed as if Geoff had barely come out unscathed - his left temple was stitched up as his right arm was in a sling and cast. John had noticeable bruises and dried blood scattered against his face, as well as having both of his hands bandaged - one of his wrists in a brace.

Your heart slammed against your chest violently, threatening to drop out of your body as you took into account that Shawn was not with them, with only a few scrapes and bruises.

Karen was talking to John and Geoff, almost in hysterical tears and Manny is about to rip someone’s throat out because they won’t tell him where his damn son is and it unnerves you. You’ve never seen them like this, in complete and utter panic and you’re going to be honest - it scared the shit out of you. Aaliyah sniffles loudly beside you, keeping in tears as she hugs you and you cradle her head against your chest and the palm of your hand, not knowing what was going on at all.

A doctor comes towards your group and begins speaking to Manny, giving him a sad look.

“You and your family can follow me, Mr. Mendes.”

What happens next, you almost couldn’t stomach.

You’re all lead to the ICU and the doctor stops you outside of a door.

“I’m afraid to say that Shawn has suffered the worst of the crash. The car directly impacted with his side of the vehicle; resulting in multiple broken bones, a punctured lung and head trauma. He is in a medically induced coma due to that - however, at this very point in time, we are unsure of when he will wake up.”

You almost dropped to your knees in a fit of sobs, but Aaliyah did that for you as you held onto her. You stood there with your mouth open and eyes burning, thinking this whole thing is so incredibly wrong.

“Can we see him?” Manny’s voice shakes as he holds Karen in his arms.

The doctor nods sadly and opens the door, walking away to give you all some privacy.

As you entered the room, Shawn looked battered to a pulp as tubes are shoved down his throat and wires are pinned into his arms, one for blood, another for an IV and others connected to his chest under the gown that he was wearing.

This was not the Shawn you waved goodbye to at the airport.

Not being able to bare looking at him anymore - you walk outside and sit in the chair in the hall, right next to the door.

Your breaths got shorter and shorter until finally, your tears left your eyes and you slouched forward - hanging your head in your hands as you sobbed quietly to yourself.

And later that night, you listened to the voicemail again.

MONDAY, DECEMBER 13; 9:15 AM

Shawn had been transferred from the hospital in New York to one in Toronto, his family wanting him home.

However, it was no different in this hospital room than it was in the other. The only real difference was that your home was fifteen minutes away, not an hour and a half away.

You sat and listened to the sound of his heartbeat on the machines, and the sound of the machine that pumped air into his lungs.

A knock at the door sounded and you lift your head lightly to see Manny at the doorway, holding some coffee cups and pastries from a shop down the street. He smiles sadly and hands you a cup and pastry, you thanking him quietly. Your eyes were itchy and irritated from all the crying you had done in the past two days and honestly, you think you’re all cried out. (Probably not true).

It seemed as if none of you had left Shawn’s side in the past couple of days, only leaving his room to use the bathroom or to go to the cafeteria. However, since it was Monday and no teacher was going to excuse this - Aaliyah had to go to school.

So, that’s where Karen had gone off to - taking Aaliyah to school.

As Karen told Aaliyah it was time to go, Aaliyah pointed out that when Shawn was home, he was the one taking her to school.

That hurt.

It all hurt.

Not being able to hear his voice, his laugh, his singing.

It was painful.

You pinched the bridge of your nose, shutting your eyes tight, before sipping at the coffee Manny so heavenly supplied.

“He looks so vulnerable, all the time.” Manny said, staring sadly at his son.

Your eyes flick to Manny, seeing him slouched in his chair and eyes puffy. Pulling the paper cup away from your mouth, you look again towards your unconscious boyfriend - your heart aching.

Bruises had clearly developed along his once very prominent jaw line and one of his eyes had swollen shut, causing you pain just to look at him.

“He does.” Your scratchy voice quietly answers, not moving your eyesight from him. 

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 24; 5:03 PM

Your brain throbs as the laptop in front of you flashed some difficult inverse math equations.

You desperately wanted the beeping to quiet, causing a headache - but you knew that was the only way you knew that Shawn was still alive.

And with that information, came hope.

A few of your friends had come to visit Shawn, as well as a few of his own and it made you feel slightly better.

Slightly.

You were still miserable.

They told you it had been a full week and a half, saying that’s a long time for someone to be in a coma.

You argued, telling them that people had gone for months in a coma and come out just fine; their mouths snapped shut.

Karen told you that they were going to spend Christmas here at the hospital, and since they knew you weren’t leaving (even when they pestered you to spend it with your own family) they told you that you were always welcome to join them.

Your mother of course requested your presence at Christmas morning and dinner when she came to visit. You politely declined, not wanting to leave Shawn. There was no way you could do that to him.

Although, your mother did beg you one day to come home and rest and shower, which you said no to at first, but decided it was a good idea - with reservations.

Karen was with you everyday, as was Manny, while Aaliyah of course, had to go to school. But after, she was right with you all.

Aaliyah brought a deck of cards which you and her would play in the cafeteria - relieving some of this panic and stress.

Your professors sent all your work to you electronically, knowing you were stubborn and were not going to come to class.

A yawn racks through your body as you look at Shawn, his voice playing in your head.

“You know, with a mouth as wide as that, you can eat a beehive.”

“What? Why in the hell would I want to eat a beehive, Mendes?”

“Just a thought, babe.”

“A weird and slightly demented one.”

“Sorry?”

And after that he laughed, kissing your forehead. You would give anything to have that back.

As he sat in that hospital bed, it was hard to imagine that was the same boy who would take you to help him pick out a new guitar and discuss names for it - as if it were a pet or a child.

It all seemed like some twisted nightmare.

TUESDAY, JANUARY 12; 2:49 PM

It had been a whole month, with no signs of him making his way onto the path to recovery.

It was tiring.

It was exhausting.

It was downright painful.

The voicemail he had last sent you was what you fell asleep to every night, the sound of his calming voice. It was your only connection to when Shawn was conscious, at this point in time. Most of the time though, you would cry the second you heard it - and by the time you had played it for the one hundredth time, you were asleep. 

You had been home a lot more to rest as Karen or Manny forced you to get some sleep in your own bed. You would take and/or pick Aaliyah up from school, often. You were alone a lot - not wanting to deal with any of your friends as they continuously told you he wasn’t going to get any better and you should let him go.

“Maybe I should let my negative ass friends go. Because when he wakes up-”

“If.”

“When, I’ll be right by his side because I love him. And when you love someone, you don’t give up on them, especially when they need you the most.”

That’s when you would leave, wanting to get away from all the bullshit that clouded you whenever you were with them.

You came to the hospital today, having brought some fan mail that Shawn had received from his very worried, very supportive fans.

When you broke the news to them in an Instagram video - it seemed like the world imploded. You had thought it did, too.

“I brought some mail for you today, Shawn. They’re all from fans who are wishing you well in your recovery. And no, they’re not mad, at all. They care more about you, then anything else in the whole world.” You say the last part softly, relating.

Your eyes go to him, a huge breath slipping out of your mouth.

Nothing.

You had hoped since you started talking to him, it would help him come back.

Come back to you.

Come back to his family.

Come back to himself.

Karen looked at her son, wanting to know if that would create any kind of reaction and when it didn’t, she looked away sadly and went back to flipping through her magazine that rested in her lap.

“Shawn! I shot two goals today at practice and freaking slayed against this one kid on the team who was supposed to be on the “other team.” Well, anyway, I slammed him into the wall and he cried like a baby - it was hilarious.” Aaliyah says as she comes into the room, her sweaty jersey still around her body.

She waves her hands around like a mad woman, but stops as there was no reaction from Shawn.

No one said anything afterwards, accompanied by the beeping that you had managed to block out.

MONDAY, JANUARY 31; 4:28 AM

Manny had fallen asleep in the chair across the room, as both Karen and Aaliyah were fast asleep on a portable bed that the staff had rolled in.

You had scooted your chair right u against Shawn’s bed, allowing you to rest your head against your arms on the side of his bed, inches away from his hand that lay still.

Your eyes observed the way his skin glowed under the dim lights, his bruises faded weeks ago.

You raise your head, shakily grabbing his IV stuck hand in yours, pressing your lips delicately to the top.

Slowly setting it down, but keeping your hand against his, you open your mouth, gaze dropping.

“My mom asked me what I was going to do if you didn’t wake up, today.” Your voice is quiet as the possibility slammed against the inside of your brain, terrifying you. “I told her I didn’t know because you are going to wake up.” You say, trying to convince yourself more than anything.

At this point, you didn’t know anymore.

Doctors said his vitals remained the same, giving you no reason to raise your hope levels - but not giving you a reason to lose hope altogether.

“I need you to wake up, Shawn.” You say, sniffling. “Your mom may look like she’s fine - but it’s killing her that she can’t cook with you at night anymore, teaching you new recipes. Your dad may look like he’s fine, too, but every time I see him, I know he’s breaking just a little bit more. And Aaliyah, god, Aaliyah. She’s staying strong, staying tough. But, it’s hard when I have to listen to her cry herself to sleep because her older brother isn’t around to drive her to hockey practice or to make fun of her for something stupid.” You pause, wiping tears from your cheeks. “And me, well, I’m a god damned mess. Please - please, come back to us, baby. Come back to us.”

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 18; 12:18 PM

It startled you at first, your eyes losing sight of the paper you were writing.

Your eyes stayed on Shawn’s face, as you swore his head moved.

And when a sound came from his mouth, around the tubes that were breathing for him - you almost dropped your laptop, heart racing.

Karen, Manny and Aaliyah had stepped out of the room momentarily for different reasons, saying they would be back soon. And now, you were wishing they had waited five more minutes.

You sat on the edge of Shawn’s bed, breathing rapidly.

His finger twitched with his right arm and you almost burst into tears at the sight.

Then, came the unexpected.

Shawn took a huge breath - not from the machine, and began gagging at the fact that there was a tube shoved down his throat.

“I need some help in here!” You screamed loudly out the door, doctors flooding in as the beeping began to speed up.

Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god.

This was it.

He was waking up.

You held onto the wall, feeling lightheaded and as if you were going to pass out from excitement.

You heard him take his first breath on his own, without a tube down his throat and slowly walked towards him.

“Shawn?” You cry, holding onto yourself.

His brown eyes that you loved so much, were open and looking at you - although he did seem as if they looked a little blurry.

His body was stiff as he adjusted himself slightly and looked at you in confusion.

“Shawn?” You ask again, voice louder.

His nose scrunched up and the wrinkles in his forehead appeared, making you almost die from how happy you were.

“Who are you?”

And your heart dropped.

“What?” You ask, lip wobbling.

“Are you another nurse?”

You look around, the doctors looking at each other.

“Shawn, it’s me.”

“My name is Shawn?”

You almost stopped breathing yourself, until a small smile made its way onto that beautiful face of his.

“I’m just playing, baby.”

You burst into tears.

“You asshole! What makes you think that was okay?” You cry, collapsing against the bed.

His smile disappears as he appears worried and leans forward, taking you into his arms for the first time in months.

God, did it feel good.

“I’m sorry, baby. I’m sorry.”

You kissed him, you kissed him like you needed air - desperately.

“How long have I been out?” He asks, softly, his eyes searching yours.

Shawn’s thumb moves to swipe your tears from your eyes as you dreaded to say these words.

“You’ve been in a coma for two months.”

Shawn physically seems as if that crippled him, his breathing getting heavier.

“Listen though,” you wipe your nose on your sleeve. “You’re okay, and that’s what matters.”

You both cry together as he held you in his arms - your stomach feeling fluttery and content.

As Shawn’s family came in, they all burst into tears - overwhelmingly happy as Aaliyah hugged him while his parents attacked him with touches and kisses.

He was back, and you thank god every day.

-

the ending absolutely sucked, but I still hope ya’ll enjoyed!!

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