#someone reblogged my headcannon and tagged it widowbrave

[pate-de-rolo]

So today’s hot take is my least favourite and favourite cr ships and one (1) selfish and biased reason why

Least-

Widowveth- Veth (specifically not Nott) sees Caleb as a broken child and Caleb sees her as a funky cat

The green team (veth and fjord)- absolutely rancid combo

Keguceus (keg and caduceus)- keg is stinky in a ‘I work in manual labour’ way and Cad is stinky in a ‘have you tried this organic rock deodorant?’ Kinda way and those don’t vibe

Windowjest- Caleb doesn’t have the backbone to give Jester the life she deserves.

Fjessek (fjord and essek)- they’re both too awkward (read: Travis is and matt wouldn’t push) and it’d be the worlds slowest slow burn and I simply don’t have the time.

Fluffernutter (Nott and Jester)- why ruin a perfect friendship?

Neau (Beau and nott)- She shot her! in the ass! That’s no way to romance someone!

Widomauk (Caleb and molly)- I truly hate widowmauk most of all for no real reason something about it just gives me an ick.

favourite

Nottbreaker (Nott and Sunbreaker Ulumon)- he was a Minotaur, she was a goblin girl, could it be any more obvious? (Also the name oh my god)

Claytagon (cad and Artie)- like the lichen in Cad’s hair, I didn’t like this at first but it’s kind of growing on me. Claytagon would be an absolute acid trip of nonsense

Dunamansea (essek and Marius)- Beau would bully bully both of them but call it “character development” and I’d like to watch that

Beauron (Beau and Dairon)- I just think it’d be neat, Beau would hate the paperwork involved with dating your boss.

Bisexual maelstrom (Caleb, astrid and Eadwulf)- it’s a sexy wizard polycule !

Been-attos (veth, Yeza and Caleb)- I hate the idea but love the name.

Beauleb (Beau and Caleb but friends)- they’ve got ‘coworkers than joined and the same time and are holding the business together but writing each others 2-week notice’ energy and I love it. They both chug coffee at the office and their SOs bake them little lunches to bring with them.