#spent the entire day working on a messy demo of it in audacity and was so absorbed i forgot to eat
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#just wrote my first song in over 2 years#spent the entire day working on a messy demo of it in audacity and was so absorbed i forgot to eat#that's how you know haha#and i've been so impossibly depressed for so long that doing anything feels like a completely foreign behavior. a memory from a past life#and i mean Anything. going for a walk. cooking a meal. Talking to people. all as unfamiliar and wrong to me as eating a book of matches#so the fact that i did something like this today without giving up and letting myself give in to pain and rot is crazy to me#i'm now kind of wiped of energy altogether though surprised i'm even able to type this#not one thing can be predicted#i'm still depressed as shit but#maybe i'm not wholly done for just yet#i still feel overwhelmed by every breath i take but#hmm#tomorrow i might try to get out some of my long untouched musick gear and working on an actual recording of whatever this is. so it doesn't#die in audacity smothered in nasty audacity reverb it deserves a better life it's barely been born#may the circle be broken#audio#Spotify
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