#talesfromthecity

[coryystandby]

50! #talesfromthecity #lifestories #midlifecrisis #malemidlifecrisis (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CnjPSNwLvHw/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[ladresse-tableandwear]

#botanical #bysamuelzeller #swiss #photography #talesfromthecity #lastrainyday @ladresse

[nicolaslaborie]

About to lose myself in @new_union_bordeaux new book #talesfromthecity #escapeplan #ebook #teaready #reading

[gloryholesupernova]

Tales From The City

[radiotatuapefm]

#Repost @moyses_fabio ... http://bit.ly/TalesFromTheCity Pré venda do CD disponível (em Radio Tatuape FM) https://www.instagram.com/p/CRlYfMUDRpB/?utm_medium=tumblr

[nymblism]

Entropy

Success is a good idea, but it doesn’t exist. No one truly has their shit together. You only get better at juggling the chaos.

[girl-on-the-side]

#1.1

It took me a while to notice the ring. At first I was drawn to the complete atrocity of a violet taffeta dress she was wearing. It looked like something a New Jersey bridezilla would force her bridesmaids to wear with matching eyeshadow. But by my third time clicking through her profile pictures (there were only five, so it didn't take that long), there it was. Centered. Staring right at me, tauntingly, as platinum proof that she would always be the winner. I should've seen it earlier, as one of the two photos they shared was the typical "purposefully draped left hand on your man's chest to announce your engagement" photos, but I think my insecurity was too busy scouring her face and body for imperfections - any place where I could at least feel physically superior - to notice the obvious. And I did feel superior for a hot second; she was a bit doughy, with a pedestrianly forgettable face, big teeth and a desperate need for a good blowout. But she had the ring, and I didn't. I shouldn't really take this personally; I mean, they were engaged before I even met him. Almost a full year before our first date, if the upload date on the photo is any indication. I had a slight glimmer of hope that maybe, just maybe, they had broken up since, but she was in his brother's cover photo as well - a group shot taken at his mother's birthday dinner three months ago. And after some more stalking of his brother's photos (people should really make everything private on Facebook), I realized the dog in her cover photo was his mother's recently deceased dauschound. Nope, they were definitely still together. Before you start to feel too bad for me, I knew what I was getting into. I knew he was "ethically non-monogamous" before the first date (even if it was after he had already asked me out). Hell, there were two couples pictures of them in his old profile pictures (though from 2011 or so) I discovered after the second date. We had very clear boundaries, even if they were unwritten. In four months, I had never been to his apartment. He had never slept over. He would come to Brooklyn, we would spend the day/evening together, then he would Uber home by 2am. This should've bothered me more, but open relationships have defined rules and boundaries, and I figured these were his. And he never asked about the rest of the nights we didn't spend together, when I was busy fucking my way through the rest of the Finance Bros of New York. He would drunk text about how he'd rather be fucking me than on a business trip to Boston; I would drunk text him before making out with whatever emotionally inferior derivatives analyst I happen to be out with that night. But seeing her sitting on his lap, so happy (and a reflection of the smugness I am projecting on her out of resentment), I just couldn't handle it. Affianced just made everything so official for them, so out of reach for me. I always say that I'm too broken right now to be in a real, grown up relationship, but seeing him in one (albeit one where they don't spend as much time together as the typical New York couple) makes me think it's worth a shot. I'm not going to fight for this one, though. They have been together for at least three years in an open relationship (probably longer, and have survived at least one move if my internet skills and assumptions are what I fancy them to be), there's nothing I can really do or say to make that change. I'm not going to make him choose; he's already done that. Would I fight for more intimacy? More time together? That's just setting myself up for more disappointment later. I already text him more than I've texted any guy since I exchanged 250 a day with the childish PhD student. This is a placeholder relationship for me and nothing more; I've always known it somewhere in the back of my mind, but just wasn't quite ready to confront the hopelessness of the inevitable resolution.

My friends seem to think she doesn't know about me. They look at her picture and say "no, not that girl," but I give her more credit than that. I don't think he will ever be capable of a monogamous relationship and she knows it, so she instead is taking whatever she can (which is still quite a lot) and leaving the bad bits for girls like me. She is well-educated, she plays hockey, and she is apparently more emotionally evolved than I am if she can live in a relationship like this for years.

I really did think I had a handle on this situation, though. I've always fancied myself a modern, progressive New York girl who was above the antiquated conventions that still hamper dating and intimacy. Even if he is engaged, it shouldn't have mattered if I was really as open-minded as I had thought, emotionally capable of handling someone else's non-monogamy for the sake of my own promiscuity. It turns out I was wrong, though, and I have the tears to prove it.

[coryystandby]

50! #lifestories #talesfromthecity (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/Cnhzyprrcbl/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[coryystandby]

50! #midlifecrisis #lifestories #talesfromthecity #maletales (at City of London) https://www.instagram.com/p/CkBteOYLEj4/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[coryystandby]

#midlifecrisis #talesfromthecity 50! (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CjYZXmrru21/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[coryystandby]

#50 #lifestories 50! #midlifecrisis #malemidlifecrisis #talesfromthecity (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/Cgq4urcMc4k/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[coryystandby]

#lifestories #talesfromthecity (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CdwQSYEr1D4/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[ladresse-tableandwear]

#botanical #bysamuelzeller #swiss #photography #talesfromthecity #lastrainyday @ladresse

[ladresse-tableandwear]

#botanical #bysamuelzeller #swiss #photography #talesfromthecity #lastrainyday @ladresse

[ladresse-tableandwear]

#botanical #bysamuelzeller #swiss #photography #talesfromthecity #lastrainyday @ladresse

[ladresse-tableandwear]

#botanical #bysamuelzeller #swiss #photography #talesfromthecity #lastrainyday @ladresse