#ted when high as balls for real this time: HEY WHATS UP FUCKERS!!!!!!!!!!

[trentcrimminallybeautiful]

it would be really funny if ted's internal monologue actually has a lot of swearing he just almost never says any of it out loud bc like, he's a polite midwestern dad

[everyonesomething]

Session Ten

Sydney Gaydos goes O: "Gaydos doesn't believe she's had the pleasure of deep-dish pizza. Well, it will the Great Detective's Treat!"

Malkas: "Thanks Syd."

Edith Runekill: "I mean, see, that's just it!!! Here I am, being slung over the shoulder of my HANDSOME BOYFRIEND, in a cool, smoke-filled pool hall, after I watched two of my friends spend like ten minutes punching eachother in really cool ways???????"

Malkas does not trust her to go up stairs right now.

Edith Runekill: "And, like, I thought my life would just be I spend a few years in the city before I go back and become, I don't know, a farm wife???? Maybe do some agricultural magic????"

"Aaaaaa," she says, trying to sum things up a bit.

Grim just got called someone's friend

Grim does not know what to do with that

Malkas: "Corn magic!"

Edith Runekill: "I mean, corn magic is interesting!!! Agricultural magic is why the Plaguewrought Lands aren't wrought by plagues!! It's important, good work!!!"

"But it's not what I wanted. And I'm starting to think maybe what I want matters after all???"

Pepper: "I heard it's pretty amaizing, you could stalk out a good career in corn magic, right?"

Grim: "Don't encourage her."

Edith Runekill: "Yeah, it's... oh, stalk!!!! Hahahahaha! Hahahahahahaha, oh, Pepper. Stalk!!!!"

Grim: "You'll get an earful."

Malkas: "BA'AL."

Pepper squints at Grim. "I think you got popped harder than you think."

Edith Runekill: "An... ear... full. Oh sweet Auril!!!! Grim!!! You made a pun!!!!! Grim!!!!!"

Edith Runekill is wheezing hysterically

In this session we discover hidden depths to our party members.

The set-up: It's the evening of our lich-filled day and we're gathered at a poolhall for some much needed R&R.

The Game: The whole gang is sporting hot new threads because nothing takes your mind off near-death like buying an outfit.

Edith Runekill saunters into the pool haul-- wearing pants! And boots!! And a cool leather jacket!!! ...because her only other change of clothes is back at the Steele house.

Malkas is dressed in the same outfit but different colors.

Grim is wearing the poncho/cape/whatever situation that someone gave her, her old leather coat folded into her pack.

Sydney Gaydos is wearing the REAL and AUTHENTIC detective hat Pepper got her from their shopping trip!

Pepper has basically the same basic outfit with a nice silk handkerchief tucked into the pocket.

We look so good y'all.

Edith and Mal shoot a few games of pool while Pepper and Sydney waste money on the new pinball machine. Mal waves Grim over to join in their game who single-handedly clears the table before going back to being her usual level of social: hovering at the edge of the group and watching them goof off. Everyone else spends about 10 minutes crowded around the pinball machine before Pepper manages to hit the high score.

After that it's another round of pool: Mal and Edith vs Pepper and Syd. Edith is already drunk.

Pepper chalks up a cue. "Rack em up, then."

Edith Runekill: "Well, they say bad boys are hot! Haha. Uh."

Malkas racks up the balls, "Ohh Edith."

Edith Runekill: "Well, rack 'em...? Is that what they say?"

Malkas: "Please don't introduce new, funny words to Edi while she's drunk."

Pepper didn't think she had.

Edith Runekill: "Rack those balls. Haha. Um."

"Oh."

Edith Runekill has had maybe half of her drink at this point.

Edith Runekill | It's real bad.

The poolhall is also host to an amateur fight night in the basement, Grim, Syd, and Mal sign up leaving the two squishy casters to watch their things. Although Edith, drunk on cheap beer and her naturally rambunctious spirit, initially tries to sign up, too.

Mal's up first and fights some ugly mug known as Glass Ted who gives him a few body blows, then fights totally dirty by grabbing him by the tail and hurling him out of the ring. Edith is incensed.

Edith Runekill: "Mal, are you okay???"

"That [infernal] fucker!!"

Malkas rubs his the base of his tail, "I'll be fine."

Grim: "No magic, Runekill. You'd snap like a twig."

Edith Runekill: "What an [infernal] shithead [common] he was!!"

"I'm tougher than I look!!"

Grim: "That doesn't mean much."

Edith Runekill: "I, um."

Malkas: "Edith, I don't want to have to drag you home and explain to my mom what we've been doing."

Grim: "Tell you what, kid. Sit this one out and I'll show you how to throw a real punch when we get home."

Edith Runekill: "Oh!"

"S-sure!!"

Edith is a treasure and beloved asset to the team.

Grim's up next and her fight goes better, though her opponent does throw a handful of sand in her eyes at first before she trashes him. Syd gets revenge on Glass Ted for Mal. Soon it's down to just Grim and Syd as the finalists, and everyone really gets into it. How exciting!

Edith Runekill: "I'm glad this tournament is ending with chivalrous combat between two worthy opponents!!!"

"Haha."

Grim isn't that chivalrous though

Sydney Gaydos gets punched RIGHT IN THE SNOOT. Quite hard.

Edith Runekill winces at the blow. But, well, that's what happens in a fight...?

Malkas: "Oh Asmodeus."

Pepper directs some choice Elvish words to what she thinks of THAT punch.

Grim might be smaller than Syd but she fights like a sack of raccoons

Sydney Gaydos is doing that boxer hop since she's super into the moment

It comes down to the wire, but Syd manages to outlast Grim to win the match. Syd wins a sack of gold and Grim is in a good mood after the mutually-assured pummeling. Time for pizza! Mal and Grim go out to hail a cab and Edith keeps the mood light.

Edith Runekill: "Anyway, hey. Uh. Like. One gal to another. Do you ever get that feeling where, like, you just really admire another girl and like you want her to think you're good and cool and you also kind of want to be like her???? Does that ring a bell???"

Pepper looks at Syd like 'what'

Sydney Gaydos shoots Pepper a ?????? look.

Moving on.

All is forgotten when the gang gets to a pizza restaurant and is distracted by another pinball machine. Syd and Pepper make some headway into it, but then Edith comes over to show them the ropes. We wouldn't let her fight in the ring, but she's bound and determined to have her own battle of the night.

Edith Runekill: "All right, girls," she says, "Time to watch the pinball wizard at work."

Edith Runekill: rolling d20-2

(1)-2 = -1

Pepper watches Edith fall flat on her ass.

Malkas: "..."

Edith Runekill: "..."

"ta... da..."

Edith Runekill: "my poor butt"

Grim looks around

Grim: "..."

Pepper: "Definitely greasing the machine, here."

Sydney Gaydos helps the poor drunk Edith up.

Malkas: "... Okay."

Malkas goes to Fetch Edith.

Edith Runekill: "mal..."

"am i... dying..."

Malkas: "You okay, bunny?"

Edith Runekill: "mal... i love you... please remember me..."

Malkas lifts Edith up.

Grim is trying really hard not to laugh audibly

Edith Runekill: "Oof!"

Malkas: "I love you too. Let's get you some water."

Nora rolls up a new character out of shame.

Once she recovers some, Edith reminisces about life on the farm back in ol' Plaguewrought Land. Mal then waxes poetic about his job of tomb exploration for the museum: solving puzzles and traps that have stumped lesser researchers and preserving the history of it all. Grim shares her very practical reasons for bounty hunting: it's money and she's good at it. Syd tells us about her mothers and the Pixieton Detective Agency, her family's business—though she's cagey about how she came to be part of that family. Pepper uncharacteristically keeps her big mouth shut and doesn't say much of anything about herself other than claiming to have a restless spirit—well, that much is probably true.

The gang finishes out the pizza and the night with a better understanding of each other, even if nobody managed to beat that pinball machine.