#tendou sex supremacy

[morimallow]

NSFW Headcanons for Timeskip!Atsumu, Oikawa, and Tendou as Boyfriends

I didn't go into detail for this one to make it GN. I hope this is still alright.

AKA: Atsumu and Oikawa sex fails, Tendou sex supremacy.

Atsumu Miya

This man is FLEXIBLE. When I say flexible, not only physically but just.. flexible. He's all into plays, kinks, and stuff. He makes sex fun and enjoyable for the both of you. Stops when you feel uncomfortable or when you say your safe word.

Sex is casual between you two. Your normal conversation consists of: “Have you tried this one?” “Oh, can we do this tonight or whenever you feel like it?” “Man, I wanna ravish your hole right now, babes.”

He is a thigh man because why not? He knows his are superior but he wants you to wrap your thighs around his neck.

Appreciates every part of your body like you're made by God himself.

You guys went out to a convenience store once at 3AM and bought one pack of each available condom brand.

YOU GUYS WENT CRAZY and slept around 5PM, LOL. His stamina is crazy. That wasn't all sex though. You had oral and non-penetrative. Let's say you didn't stop until all bought condoms were in the trash bin.

They have a beach rest house, yeah? And Shoyo's “phenomenal” story about having sex on the beach didn't leave his mind. He wanted to try it with you.

Of course, you guys blessed the whole house first with orgasms and moans. After the interior, he's ready to dominate you on the beach.

At first was alright. You had placed a big beach towel on the sand under the big rainbow beach umbrella. Y'all did foreplay and all that but then it felt weird because of the sand. Some might've got into you, LOL, SORRY.

Atsumu told Shoyo he's a liar and the latter didn't understand why he said that. Tsumu then explained his experience and Shoyo laughed so hard and said he was pertaining to the drink he had back in Brazil.

Tooru Oikawa

Don't fight me on this because I can't see Oikawa doing things other than vanilla sex and BDSM. I'm sorry. He's nowhere in between.

Kidding, he's into cross-dressing! He loses his shit when he sees you wearing tights. Foreplay who? He doesn't know it.

Hmm, you'd go out to buy outfits with a toy inside you or something. Likes the thrill of getting caught or when someone notices he's doing things.

HE'LL DO IT ANYWHERE as long as you're up for it too! He once fingered you senseless with his beautiful fingers behind the comfort room of a park and a ball stopped at your feet.

The kid then followed the ball and Oikawa was still into it, he went faster even and you couldn't contain your moans. You were panicking and he just laughed. You didn't notice he kicked the ball far enough so the kid won't see you.

You guys don't have sex so often even though he already has more than enough time for you because he realized overworking doesn't mean he'd achieve certain victory. He doesn't want you to feel like he's using you for venting purposes.

He wanted to try having sex in the shower for quite some time now. He actually asked you about your opinion in this matter and you were like.. sure, why not? What's the worst thing that could happen?

HE BUMPED HIS HEAD MULTIPLE TIMES. I'M SO SORRY I'M DOING THIS.

You see, he's used to having sex in cramped spaces — you did it in his car, gym's storage room, Harry Potter's cupboard. But in the shower? Both of you? AND DON'T MENTION THE WATER. Sex there was the worst.

You have an album entitled: Tooru's Nudes and Other Sexy Stuff. I won't entertain any questions.

Satori Tendou

You're pressed up against the big window of your shared complex overlooking the Eiffel Tower as Tendou's thrusts become sloppier by the second. Yes, I'll start with this for Tendou because he deserves everything.

Okay, we go to our Miracle Boy.. in this case, AN ATTRACTIVE MAN WITH SEX FINESSE AND EXPERTISE.

I'm not having my favorites, I swear. Tendou just knows what he's doing and what you're up to.

For example, you've been thinking about asking him to play with your ass and hours later mid-make-out session, he asks you if you'd let him play with your ass. Is he psychic or something? God, he's perfect.

It's either he has sex with you NAKED or FULLY-CLOTHED. Nope, there is nothing in between, ma'am/sir.

He likes the feeling of your rim squeezing him but he also likes it when theres a piece of clothing touching his dick while fucking you.

When I said fully-clothed, I mean even if you're wearing jeans. He'd just let it sit around your knees and he'd pull down his just enough to free his cock.

With that being elaborated, he loves fucking you in public. You guys had practiced the art of Not Getting Caught Having Sex in Public, yes, it's art.

This is weird and probably uncomfortable even just by thinking about it but he made you wear skinny jeans without underwear. Yes.

He wanted to cross that out of your guys'sex list (yes, he has a sex list on his phone and he adds something every day). KITCHEN SEX. FOOD PLAY. Oh, and he ripped your jeans. Haha, ripped jeans— RIPped jeans (LMAO, MY SENSE OF HUMOR IS QUESTIONABLE). Sorry, I had to say that.

SFW version here.

M. List

[waka-chan-out]

their favorite (sometimes problematic) songs

featuring: as many characters as i could think of

yes, they’re all feminists, but sometimes a song comes on that’s so good you have to set that aside and jam. these are their songs of choice.

also note that this is a joke. some of these songs are objectifying, offensive, weird, overly sexual, or problematic, but definitely not all of them. this is just a funny way to categorize this brand of music and is not meant to be taken seriously. this is for fun.

Karasuno

Daichi: sexy back by justin timberlake. just wants a partner that will hype him up when he sings this in the car.

Sugawara: WAP by cardi b and megan thee stallion. this is the first example of a song that isn’t problematic or misogynistic, but it’s dirty and fun and he loves it. sings it specifically to mess with asahi.

Asahi: escape (the pina colada song) by rupert holmes. he doesn’t understand the meaning though so he gets a pass.

Tanaka: fuck you by ceelo green. gotta respect a man that likes the classics.

Nishinoya: like a boss by the lonely island.

Ennoshita: mind over matter by anthony ramos. goodbye he is so hot. do yourself a favor and listen to this song asap it’s 0% problematic and 100% sexy.

Kinnoshita: gimme gimme gimme by abba. that scene in mamma mia awoke something in him that he didn’t know existed.

Tsukishima: shake it by metro station

Yamaguchi: 34 + 35 by ariana grande. mumbles the lyrics and does the little tiktok dance when he thinks tsukki isn’t looking but tsukki is always looking.

Kageyama: foot fungus by ski mask the slump god. i don’t have an explanation for this one but i can imagine him listening to it.

Hinata: yeah by usher. i can see him getting down to this song, especially during the brazil arc.

Coach Ukai: the stroke by billy squier

Kiyoko: jenny (i wanna ruin our friendship) by studio killers

Yachi: slumber party by ashnikko but she’ll take that information to her grave. she’s very much a tegan and sara lesbian but none of their songs really fit for this.

Aoba Josai

Oikawa: rules by doja cat. iwaizumi says he’s not into it but he’s totally into it.

Iwaizumi: scotty doesn’t know by lustra

Matsukawa: EVERYWHERE I GO BY HOLLYWOOD UNDEAD. this song and this man are the reason i started this list. holy shit.

Hanamaki: my first kiss by 3OH!3. i can do vividly imagine him and mattsun yelling this song in the car (specifically 0:28 - 0:44 and 1:27 - 1:48)

Kindaichi: beachboy. we wins the award for most likely to be caught by his partner’s father with them straddling his lap.

Kunimi: molly by mindless self indulgence

Kyotani: methhead freestyle by lil darkie.

Nekoma

Kuroo: SHAKE THAT BY EMINEM. thank you for coming to my ted talk.

Kenma: rap music by lil darkie. someone asks to listen to his music one time and they just stare at him with screaming in their ear.

Lev: don’t you want me by the human league. he and synthesizers are on the same wavelength. i don’t know how to explain it.

Yaku: stacy’s mom by fountains of wayne. milf fucker yaku supremacy.

Yamamoto: bonfire by childish bambino

Fukanaga: samurai abstinence patrol by ninja sex party. everyone is absolutely baffled the first time he plays this and 6969 on a long bus ride but by the end they’re losing their fucking minds.

Fukurodani

Bokuto: let’s link by whoheem

Akaashi: daddy issues by the neighborhood. i had to.

Konoha: motherlover by the lonely island

Shiratorizawa

Ushijima: reelin in the years by steely dan. this is an extremely self-indulgent pick.

Tendou: just lose it by eminem

Goshiki: 505 by the arctic monkeys. someone kiss this man i’m begging you.

Semi: scott pilgrim vs. the world ruined a whole generation of women by negative xp. i’m gonna punch him in the head.

Shirabu: bad girls by mkto. he’s seen the music video about as many times as i have (a lot!!!)

Inarizaki

Atsumu: STARSTRUKK by 3OH!3. i’m gonna scream.

Osamu: walk down by fnf chop. this never leaves my brain. osamu i’m begging you to come over.

Kita: closest i can get with this gem is come a little bit closer by jay & the americans. problematic, sure, but he knows that and just thinks the song is groovy. he likes the trumpets.

Suna: fashionably late by falling in reverse

Aran: the sadder by wiser girl (specifically the seth macfarlane version because it fucks)

Date Tech

Aone: summer nights from grease <3

Futakuchi: she’s so nice by pink guy. that’s very sexy of him.

Koganegawa: my band by d12

Other

Sakusa: no children by the mountain goats

Komori: american boy by estelle and kanye west. he just thinks it’s groovy. he also knows all the words to the fortnight version and it drives sakusa CRAZY.

Terushima: whip a tesla by yung gravy

Daishou: sexy bitch by david guetta and akon

Hoshiumi: short kings anthem by blackbear and tiny meat gang. i’m sorry but i’m also not. this is a perfect choice.

Hirugami: nicotine by panic! at the disco

Gao: OMG by usher and will.i.am

Meian: scream by usher

Oliver Barnes: lovin touchin squeezin by journey

remember this is based on music i listen to and enjoy. if you think a different song fits better or you don’t like something i chose, i highly encourage you to make your own list because it’s quite fun

also somehow donttrustme didn’t make the list??? i have no idea how but that feels criminal lmao