#text post ✨✍🏻🤎

[katnissmellarkkk]

it’s always really funny when people say the books portray Peeta as too kind or too wonderful or that he shouldn’t be the representation of hope and rebirth and renewal and all things good in the world. i always wanna ask if the person saying this is aware that the narrator of the story is literally in love with him.

like of course she’s biased. that’s her husband of over twenty years.

[katnissmellarkkk]

katniss when she never thought she would see peeta again : depressed, anxious, mood swings like crazy, crying nonstop, disoriented, dissociated, grieving like a widow in the war.

katniss when she never thought she would see gale again : “now i can do whatever i want with peeta and no one can make me feel guilty for it”

[katnissmellarkkk]

as i was watching the ballad movie last night, my sister leaned over to me during the scene where jessup rabidly attacks lucy gray and said “so this is where snow got the idea to hijack peeta” and while that’s probably not exactly correct because doubtful old coryo kept this exact moment filed away for 65 years on the off chance he may want to use it for inspo, i couldn’t help but feel like visually it created quite a parallel. jessup chasing after the girl who cared for him, who refused to abandon him despite the arena and tried to keep him alive despite his obvious injury. i definitely saw the resemblance, between two rabid boys and the two songbirds who cared for them (to obviously varying degrees).

only difference is peeta didn’t stay rabid. just like the two girls, peeta was also a survivor.

[katnissmellarkkk]

Peeta : a sweet, genuine teenager who is crying on the ride away from the only home he’s ever known because he believes he’ll never return again and his mother all but validated his lack of self-worth in their probable last moments together.

Katniss : so what’s his angle? how does he plan to use this against me in the arena?

[katnissmellarkkk]

🥰🥰🥰

[katnissmellarkkk]

Katniss introducing her two love interests :

Peeta : ashy blonde hair that falls across his forehead in waves, his height, his eye color, his facial expression, his warmth—

Gale : he could be my brother.

[katnissmellarkkk]

— Katniss’ inner dialogue during the sewer kiss in Mockingjay

[katnissmellarkkk]

it’s super funny to me that in the first scene with haymitch in the entire series, he loudly proclaims he likes katniss, and then goes on to spend the next five hundred or so pages pretending the exact opposite.

[katnissmellarkkk]

it’s kind of interesting that throughout all of mockingjay, even when peeta was gone and katniss desperately missed him and his presence beside her at night, and even when she believed peeta would never again be the boy with the bread, the idea of gale sleeping with her or sharing the same bed as her to help with the nightmares never ever comes up.

[katnissmellarkkk]

there’s been lots of headcanons about katniss and peeta’s falling back in love lately and i’m curious for everyone’s take on my personal headcanon.

i really imagine that when all is said and done, and peeta is more or less himself again, he realizes all katniss (and haymitch and even finnick) did for him while he was recovering from his hijacking. and he realizes that she’s loved him all this time, even if she could never say it.

and i have always thought when he returns to twelve, he’s the one who’s more in tune with how he feels and it’s him reaching out and eventually he’s the one initiating the romance first (granted, i headcanon it’s fairly slow. i also headcanon growing back together period was only a year or so). but does anyone else feel this way or nah, you think it must be katniss who makes the first move because peeta never knew if she loved him or not (i definitely think he did by the end of catching fire, so after he’s recovered enough to return to twelve, i think he probably is fairly certain once again that she loves him).

[katnissmellarkkk]

i just realized movie!peeta never told katniss he loved her. every moment he said it in the book was cut.

[katnissmellarkkk]

tiktok just rudely pointed out that peeta planted the primroses for katniss to give her a place to grieve and a physical reminder of prim to hold onto because when the bomb exploded there was nothing left of her to mourn.

[katnissmellarkkk]

Only a couple more posts like this and then I’ll leave y’all alone but… I don’t know how to explain or articulate it properly but there is something I’ve never picked up on before that I suddenly caught when re-reading Mockingjay.

These two moments… when you compare and contrast them…

Gale’s touch and taste and heat remind me that at least my body’s still alive, and for the moment it’s a welcome feeling. I empty my mind and let the sensations run through my flesh, happy to lose myself. When Gale pulls away slightly, I move forward to close the gap, but I feel his hand under my chin. “Katniss,” he says. The instant I open my eyes, the world seems disjointed. This is not our woods or our mountains or our way. My hand automatically goes to the scar on my left temple, which I associate with confusion. “Now kiss me.” Bewildered, unblinking, I stand there while he leans in and presses his lips to mine briefly. He examines my face closely. “What’s going on in your head?”

“I don’t know,” I whisper back.

she says here she’s (somewhat passively) giving gale all that she withheld from him (when peeta, in her mind, was still a possibility) and thinks at least kissing him makes her feel somewhat alive, but even during the kiss she’s not present or focused on gale, and he catches onto that. but the portion highlighted is the important part of this scene. she is startled back into reality when gale calls her name and her awakening is the realization that this isn’t their way. she doesn’t even say “this isn’t my way” (as in, kissing isn’t something she does unless on camera for a show). and she doesn’t say “this isn’t our woods or our mountains or our home” (as in, this place is unfamiliar and strange and scary and that’s what’s disjointing her). no, she says “this isn’t our way”. because this isn’t what she does with gale. kissing gale feels alien and wrong in her heart. even with peeta out of the picture.

and then the second passage from later down the line in mockingjay:

Like the mutts. Like a rabid beast bent on ripping my throat out. And here, finally here in this place, in these circumstances, I will really have to kill him. And Snow will win. Hot, bitter hatred courses through me. Snow has won too much already today.

It’s a long shot, it’s suicide maybe, but I do the only thing I can think of. I lean in and kiss Peeta full on the mouth. His whole body starts shuddering, but I keep my lips pressed to his until I have to come up for air. My hands slide up his wrists to clasp his. “Don’t let him take you from me.”

peeta, who she claims to have given up on, is begging to be left behind. how many times has she claimed throughout this book that she wishes he was dead (either to end his suffering or to end her own)? and right here, she has just blown up the halo to mercifully kill finnick. she is so desensitized to death by this point. and she thinks she’s so desensitized to peeta. she doesn’t even want to consider he still is peeta. but here, when she has every reason to put him (and herself) out of his misery, she instead turns to kissing him. why? why would you kiss the monster who is actively fighting to not murder you with his bare hands? why would you kiss the boy you called a mutt? the one who you have already done your best to let go of? why would that even cross your mind as a last ditch effort?

because kissing peeta isn’t disjointing and it’s not something she only did for the cameras and it’s certainly not something she’s only doing passively. she’s kissing peeta to remind him who he is. to remind herself who he is to her. she’s tried so hard to stop caring for him, to sever the cord between the two of them, but in this moment she just can’t. she kisses him and says “don’t let him take you from me”.

because the act of kissing actually is their way.

[katnissmellarkkk]

don’t ask me why but these two quotes feel so similar to me.

the first, katniss reliving how she felt months after her father died :

It was during the worst time. My father had been killed in the mine accident three months earlier in the bitterest January anyone could remember. The numbness of his loss had passed, and the pain would hit me out of nowhere, doubling me over, racking my body with sobs. Where are you? I would cry out in my mind. Where have you gone? Of course, there was never any answer.

and the second, katniss expressing her agony for having lost peeta to the capitol :

I squeeze my eyes shut and try to reach for him across the hundreds and hundreds of miles, to send my thoughts into his mind, to let him know he is not alone. But he is. And I can’t help him.

idk if anyone else sees the vision besides me but these feel like parallel quotes to me 🤷🏼‍♀️

[katnissmellarkkk]

why are snow’s parents giving…. everlark on the victory tour? 😭

[katnissmellarkkk]

you know, as much as katniss reminds haymitch of himself, imagine with me for a moment that peeta reminds him of his girl (the one snow murdered).

like i always pictured haymitch’s love being from the seam. but what if she wasn’t? what if she was from town? what if she was a merchant? what if the reason haymitch has a soft spot for peeta because he reminds him of the person he lost?

idk thinking lots of thoughts.