#thank you for the ppl that replied to the previous post btw. i appreciate it. i dont have anything to say back though.. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

dexaroth · 1 month

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i feel so hollow.. and guilty.. i wish i couldve done more for him. he's just.. gone. for real this time. i always made sure to take a look at him when going out or to the kitchen to make sure he was breathing, and yet mom found him first. i could swear i could feel a faint heartbeat from him, but it was mine racing so fast it rippled through my veins. just.. gone. i feel soulless.

#thank you for the ppl that replied to the previous post btw. i appreciate it. i dont have anything to say back though..#and i have a college test tomorrow too. sure hope i dont cry so hard i get a migraine again in front of the class 🙃#we managed to send him to be cremated right after we found him.. he died miserable. just like i will probably as well #i genuinely dont know what ill do when my other dogs die. theyre like 11. i try to be optimistic but when that happens ill just #not have anything else truly holding me back from ending it all. though i know its not the awnser and i wont do it anyways #i regretted the first time i tried because i went to say goodbye to him specifically. and i held him in my arms as i waited to die #and cried as i regretted it knowing they would be even more neglected if i did die #i dont know how to describe my feelings right now. genuinely hollow. i feel like i should see a blank featureless face in the mirror #tw pet death #dextxt #tw suicide mention

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