#that’s what he calls Steve anyway even tho he is not really doing secretary stuff lol

[missjashin]

Steve’s dad making him work at his company but starts regretting it rather fast because there’s this guy who keeps showing up and distracting Steve. He already made a big deal out of his son coming to finally work for him and this is how he is rewarded? Some boy in his ripped jeans and chains and with his long wild curls comes in and makes his son goddamn giggle.

And no one even knows how the guy gets in. The security guys have no idea where he comes from. Definitely not the front door, they would see him enter.. But without a doubt he will always appear at some point, chat up with his boy until he gets kicked out. And Steve refuses to tell anything about the guy, claims he doesn’t really know him.

[peacefulwriter88]

Ripples - Part 9

Series Tag List: @captainxamerica, @just---love, @senpaiace, @glittercoveredsouls, @findacauseandserveit, @devil-may-cry-11-blog, @agentbarnescarter, @mannatgalhotra @harrisbn @sapphire1727 @ishipmybed @nessy-bearxb @calaofnoldor @cautionconed @badassbaker @mannatgalhotra @girlwonder86 @thatpunkrockfandomchick @barnesdeservestheworld @gratittie @memory-of-a-goldfish @tacohead13 @greeneyedgirls4 @lloeppky @justanotherbuckydevotee@jasmineladjevardi @hollycornish @seargantbcky @planet-holland @violentpleasure @patzammit

Warnings – Fluff, language, being conflicted between Steve and Bucky

A/N: It’s been a while. I’m sorry. I lost a lot of inspiration for a while and got caught up in Ben Barnes as Billy Russo. Infinity War trailer re-inspired me. It actually kind of fucked me up. So here’s this. And probably another part soon. And also a new story featuring these two truly.

Need a refresher? Read part 8

Bucky POV

He walked over to you, watching the way you tensed as you neared him. He understood. If anyone watched you now, they would think that with all the excitement happening to you, you were immune to it. Immune to the fact that you were going to get more than a slap on your hand for all the drama you had caused. Could even possibly have jail time or worse. You didn’t let it get to you though.

This morning he did what he always did. Went to the window and waited for you, making sure that you got in okay. It was an odd habit, and Sam once had teased him that it was borderline creepy, but he just wanted to make sure that you were safe. That was important for him. He had watched you step out of your car, your white blouse a stark contrast to the black button pants you wore that you had opted to wear with suspenders. Red lipstick adorned your face and with the black heels you worse, the whole ensemble felt like a modern version of a 40s pin up girl and it stirred something primitive in him.

Even from where he stood at his window, his hands scrunched up in his jean pockets, he couldn’t help the way you made him feel. Aroused. Proud. Happy. At peace. He wanted to push you against a wall all the while whispering how much he loved you – how he wanted to spend the rest of his life fighting beside you as he drove his cock in you. Wanted to bruise your neck with his kiss, mark you for the world to know that you belonged to him. Wanted you to rack your nails down his back while you whimpered out his name, biting at his shoulders begging him to make you cum. Wanted you to run your hands through his long hair, tussling it so bad that when you both re-emerged everyone would know that he belonged to you, that he was yours.  

He was so in love with you and that realization and acceptance scared the shit out of him.

As he stood beside you now, your body tense as your brain went through all the outcomes of this international realization, how you blew your cover and now had a room of highly trained and powerful people aware that you were around to spy on them, he knew you were just as afraid. Not of the people in the tower – the people who held no power but somehow had some control over you. It was so bad, he was sure that Steve and him were an afterthought. It was the little things you did when you were anxious or nervous – you kept tapping your thumb nail against your cup, the ceramic container tinging against the light sounds of chatter coming from inside. Could hear the way your heart steadily beat, your breathing a rhythmic hitched sound as you shifted from one foot or another.

As a highly trained soldier, he knew this response. You felt caged, unable to find an exit. It was the worse feeling. It was how his mind had kept him since he had stopped being The Winter Soldier. Even though the Wakandians had cured his mind from betraying him, they couldn’t take away the nightmares. He hated that the most of himself.

“I don’t care about your secrets Y/N. I want to make sure you’re ok.” He places his metal arm hesitantly on your right shoulder and you look down at it before looking back up into his eyes. Your heartbeat instantly calms, your breath evens out and you shift to move closer to him, placing your head on the cool metal of his arm. He shifts, moving so he can wrap his arm gently around your waist as your head props on his left pec and you give a content sigh, closing your eyes.

Perhaps, in some odd, twisted way he helped calm you too.

“How are you healing up?” you ask and he shrugs, looking out to the forest scenery.

“Think I’ll survive another day doll. Steve does wallop a mean punch tho – kind of proud of him. Too bad he’s trying to steal my best girl from me.” He winks down at you and you laugh, wrapping your arm around his torso.

You give a content hum as he places a soft kiss on your forehead, letting the silence envelope you. If someone measured how much time the two of you spent not speaking, they’d wonder how the two of you became a pair to begin with. Wouldn’t know that when you’re a fighter, you’re constantly by yourself, in your thoughts. Thinking of exit strategies. Except when he was with you. When he was with you, he was home. Knew you were at home.

The price of peace was high except until you showed him that it was worth fighting for.

“Terry is going to kill me.” You finally say, breaking him from his thoughts as you free hand wraps around his torso, grabbing your mug of coffee to take a sip. He takes your cue, holding you captive in the caged hug and you rest your chin on his chest once you’re done finishing the cup.

“Terry….?”

“The silver haired fox who walked in with our secretary of defense who looks like a harmless old man but has the instincts of a lion. He was the one leading the MI-6 team, the CIA – FBI. Oh, and all the other heads who I can’t name but you know, basically the world’s top governments agencies. He’s my boss and he’s going to fucking kill me.”

He chuckles, watching the way your head curls back into his chest and he rests his chin on top of it, rubbing your back.

“I highly doubt that princess.” He whispers in low Romanian and you nip at him, your teeth grazing against his teal Henley. You hated it when he called you princess.

“I mean it Y/N,” he says more seriously. “You are damn good at your job. I mean, I don’t know exactly what your skill sets are outside of your amazing flexibility in bed…” another nick and he laughs, drawing you closer to him.

“I kid, I kid. Well sorta. Basically none of us expected you to be a sleeper agent and we are all designed to sniff this stuff out. Not even Wanda who can read minds. Don’t know how you managed that one.”

“God, I’m really going to have to up your movie game. Again!” You haven’t moved from his chest but he can feel the way you smile against him and gives a casual shrug. You always said that and it always led to hours being alone with you watching movies he could care less for. But it made you happy so he complied.

“My point is, you managed to do whatever it is you were doing here successfully. Except I’m guessing getting involved with Steve and I was not part of your end plan.”

You groan into his chest, before resting your chin back on him. He can tell by the way your eyes are looking at him your debating telling him the whole truth.

“Aww fuck it. I’ll tell you – probably will find out anyways. Obviously you weren’t part of the mission – you know the standard wine and dine. In fact I was told explicitly to make no connections with anyone. I tried really hard too but goddamn Bucky – you and Steve made it impossible. And Tony and Natasha. And Clint. And Wanda. Even Vision, Brue and Thor. And Sam…..

“Anyways, when I realized I was falling in deep, I let Terry know but he wouldn’t have it. Encouraged it actually. Said it was great to build trust. That was part of the gimmick. Ignored me when I suspected you had feelings for me. Oh yea Buck, I figured that out real quick. You were sooooo obvious.”

He can feel his face flush over in a coat of pink, the heat taking over his body and you place a soft kiss on his chest.

“It was endearing. It was cute. I liked it. I liked it because even though Emo Buck is around literally 99% of the time, you started smiling when you were around me. Started telling jokes. I remember the first time you laughed, it was like music to my ears. It eased me. I was worried about you. I liked that you started sharing more of yourself with me – your secrets. Your insecurities. All I wanted to do was tell you them back.”

“You told Steve.”

He doesn’t mean for it to slip but it does. It does because it hurts him. Always bit at his soul. You told Steve everything. Your eyebrows furrow together.

“Fucking Steve can’t keep a secret for shit!” he can’t help but laugh at that. That had always been true – Steve was way too open to hold other people’s secrets. He didn’t even mean it, just the way he was built.

“I told Steve because it’s easy to tell him those things. I trusted him too. But I knew if I told you…it’d be different. Because it wouldn’t be the scratched surface of who I am, what I was willing to share to build trust. It’d be the whole thing, including my current mission. And I couldn’t share my mission. And I couldn’t lie to you. So I didn’t say a word.”

That made sense. Made sense because he was fountain of information, typically about him, when he was around you.

“The point is, I told Terry as much and he brushed it aside as a kids crush. Told me ride with it. And then, at one point, I figured fuck it. I was just going to tell you how I felt. And then maybe I could balance this secret agent playing as an innocent secretary thing. Got too damn greedy. Probably why the whole Steve and I getting drunk thing happened. I was really nervous about telling you how I felt so I thought a drop of that damn devils blood of an ale would loosen me up. Not lead to me getting married.”

His lips quirk up in a smile. He knew you liked him. He knew it – could feel it. But he didn’t play with chance. Unless he voiced it, he wasn’t going to say a damn thing.

“So you were going to sleep with me that night?” he jokes and you groan, hiding your face in his chest.

“Get off it Buck.”

“Just tell me…” he pokes your side and you giggle, looking back up at him.

“No! Get off of it Winter Soldier.”

He lets up, placing a kiss on your forehead before murmuring,

“I already know...”

“I know you know.”

Silence. Then your saying quickly,

“Fine! I liked you. I was willing to sacrifice all of this, this secret agent business, so I could give this a chance. Figured I could monitor the Avengers and finally tell the man that I love how I was feeling about him. Figured that monitoring the progress of the group, gauging threat levels for our planet, measuring each person’s ability to protect us would go hand in hand with being able to love you back. Even if you were an ass about it. You know, using the jealousy card on all women doesn’t work.”

His eyes flit away from you, back to the scenery at hand.

“I’m sorry about that. That was rude and childish of me.”

“It was. But you know, I didn’t make it any better. I ended up falling for your best friend and marrying him.”

Oh.

You sigh as you push away from him a bit but he won’t let go. Not when he finally has you all to himself.

“I love you Bucky. I really do. And I didn’t feel that way about Steve when I married him either…I mean maybe like a physical attraction sure because Steve is just as much a looker as you. But it wasn’t until after….or maybe before…I don’t know. Something changed. Something changed and now I’m stuck loving two super soldiers. I’m telling you this because you deserve to hear it okay. You deserve to know. If we are really going to figure this out we gotta start being honest. This is my olive branch.”

You watch him, biting your lip anxiously and he swipes hair out of your face. Caresses your cheek. He couldn’t admit it hurt him to hear the words, knowing that you were just as much in love with Steve, his best friend – his brother – than with him. Could understand it. You may have once been broken like him, but you healed yourself like Steve. It made sense your compatibility with them both.

However, knowing something to be true didn’t take away from it hurting less.

“I know that,” he whispers. “Still sucks.”

You nod, your eyes welling with tears and he shakes his head, a gentle smile tugging onto his lips. It hurt but he still loved you. Appreciated you. Cared for you. Knew you felt the same. That was enough for now.

“I can’t convince you to stop loving Steve.” he places he places his hands on your face, cupping your soft flesh as he looks down at you. “I can tell you that I love you. That I hid behind the line of women because I didn’t think I could measure up to you. That I know what it’s like to have a tarnished past and to feel unable to move forward from it. Know that I am willing to wait for you, for 100 years or more if that is what it takes, because you deserve to choose what makes you happy.”

You didn’t cry. He knew that about you - knew that you had learned to check your emotions a long time ago. From the job and life, you led he was sure but now, standing in front of him you were a pool of tears. He was always the reason that made you cry and he hated himself for it.

“Bucky, I don’t deserve you. I’m literally putting you in the middle of a love triangle. You deserve someone better.”

He chuckles, shaking his head as he presses his forehead to yours.

“If the only lump in our relationship is having to deal with Steve, at least it’s a guy I respect.”

You laugh and nod, tears spilling out your eyes and he places a soft kiss on your eyelids.

“You’re strong and going to get past this.” he mumbles against your skin, referring back to the bigger issues that was pressing and you shake your head pulling away,

“I feel like I’m going to get shipped to Serbia. There’s a lot of mini Hydra bases they’d just love me to infiltrate and destroy.”

You give a small chuckle, trying to dispel the tension in the situation but he knows better.

“Even though Tony hates you right now, he also genuinely loves you and is invested in you. And you’re pretty badass and would be a great addition to the team. You took down two talented super soldiers. Pretty damn good resume builder if you ask me” you laugh as again as he pulls you into a hug.

“We are going to make sure to protect you. You’re going to be all right. And if not, I’ll go wherever they ship you off too.”

You shake your head, wrapping yourself around him and he gives a content sigh as you murmur,

“I hope you're right Mr. Barnes.”

He gives one last smile, bending down to push a kiss on your lips.

“You have to give yourself more credit doll. Steve, wouldn’t you agree she’s too hard on herself?” he turns to find Steve pressed against the door and you flush over, instinctively putting a bit of space between Bucky and yourself. You know it doesn’t matter but you feel obligated to diffuse where you can, even if it goes without care.

Bucky chuckles, infiltrating your space one last time to give you a slow and steady kiss before walking to the balcony doors, past Steve.

“She’s all yours,” he mumbles, moving past him and walking back into the house. Back to curious eyes who tried to hard to hide the fact that they had probably watched everything go down.

“That was a very kind thing you did for her.” Wanda says as he moves past the living room, the only person who hadn’t moved their attention from the television as Clint raises an eyebrow, looking up from his deck of cards he was playing with.

The sound of masculine shouts erupted from the space occasionally which he could only assume was their guests putting everyone on edge.  

“I haven’t done anything yet?” Clint says and Natasha rolls her eyes as Vision quietly answers,

“She wasn’t talking about you Clint.”

“Thought you all were going to be a part of that mess upstairs.” Bucky says, stepping into the open kitchen and digging through the cabinets and Bruce takes off his glasses, cleaning them expertly. A nervous habit he picked up when he was concerned.

“They thought that would lend to too many voices,” he places his glasses on the bridge of his noise as he continues, “seems like your girlfriend has created a bigger mess than we could have anticipated.”

He doesn’t mean to slam the cabinet doors but he does and everyone turns to him.

“She’s Steve’s wife.”

Despite what he had told you, he still had to make peace with that fact. And he honestly didn’t want everyone else to ask him about it. Everyone in this place, like Steve, didn’t know how to keep a secret.

Maybe Natasha. Possibly Wanda. He would even venture Sam to a degree. But for him, that was it. Steve once – he was good at keeping the big things when asked but since he married you, he bled everything that was shared to you.

He had to pay for privacy.

“The way you were shmoozing her on the balcony would say otherwise. Got Steve really pissed off. It’s the moodiest I’ve ever seen him…” Sam drawls off as Bucky’s eyes burn into him and he raises his arms.

“What? They were watching too. It is GLASS doors that’s separating that space from this one.”

Bucky rolls his eyes as he leans against the counter.

“Not like it’s any of your business but I’m out of this fight. The rest is up to her.”

Muted silence. Finally,

“.... that should bode well.” Sam mutters underneath his breath, gaining another jab from Thor.

“What? Its true.” he winces, rubbing the tender spot and Thor shakes his head.

“The metal man is right - its none of our business.”

Bucky chuckles, crossing his arms across his chest despite his sour mood. How could one man with so much good intentions deliver such subtle insults.

“For the last time Thor I’m not a metal man. I just have a metal arm.”

“Same thing.” The large Asgardian shrugs.

Steve’s POV

Steve walked into the shared space of the avenger’s tower, desperately trying to ignore the swarm of agents that were moving in and out. Needing to find you.

He had woken up in sweats, barely sleeping on and off. When he had come into the infirmary three days back, Natasha was sitting next to him, a book in her hand as her feet propped on the foot of his bed. She had glanced up and smirked, shaking her head as she returned her eyes back to her book.

“How you doing sleeping beauty?”

His response is a groan, trying to sit up in bed.

“Wouldn’t do that. You and Barnes beat the shit out of each other.”

He groaned, trying to lift his head when a stabbing pain entered his skull. What the hell did Bucky do to him.

“Oh, that little gift was probably left over from your wife. She had a lot of feelings about you and Barnes beating the shit out of her apartment complex.”

Steve closed his eyes, remembering the way he had felt when you had opened the door. Your lips plump, hair askew it was how he liked you best. When you first woke up and didn’t try hard to make yourself even more beautiful than you were. Then things had clicked in place. You weren’t wearing his over large t-shirt. Your neck was bruised, but not from his love bites. He could smell him just as it clicked in his head.

Bucky.

He was so angry. So angry at you. At Bucky. You knew it. And yet he couldn’t be because he knew how much you both loved each other. Knew how torn you were. Tried to reason with that. But Bucky had also known how much he had loved you too. Rather he liked it or not, he was supposed to step down. That kind of disappointing anger had fueled him up, leaving him in a rage.

“Is she okay? We didn’t hurt her or anything?”

Natasha snorts, shaking her head.

“No, she pretty much got the drop on the both of you. Forgot how good and resourceful she is,” she stands up stretching and Steve sighs, closing his eyes.

“What should I do Natasha?”

Natasha considered him for a moment, watching him carefully before saying.

“I know she loves you Steve. She has told me as much. She really likes the idea of starting a life with you. But…. there’s just something about her and Bucky. I know you see this too. Know you can feel it when they are together. They fit, like this perfect little unit. She knows him – he knows her…. I don’t know Steve. I think you could show her a whole lot about happiness and love but I think Bucky can love her and understand her despite her flaws in ways you never can. Not because you’re not right for her but because they’re just one in the same. But hell, what do I know.” She walks over to him and places a soft kiss on her forehead.

“Eventually, you all are going to have to sit down and sort this out. And whatever she decides, whether it’s you, Bucky or no one, you both need to respect that. I’m not saying she’s an innocent angel in all of this but I do know she’s really tried to disengage with both of you. She’d rather be miserable alone than ruin a good friendship.”

Steve knew this. You were selfless in all the ways you were being selfish. He was being selfish. Bucky was being selfish. Natasha was right. The three of you had to sit down and talk this out. No more whispering behind walls and using sex to manipulate you.

He had a plan.

And then he had woken up and found a note on the side of his table.

Steve,

I’m not worth any of this. I’ll be reassigned today and you won’t have to deal with me or Bucky or any of this anymore. You deserve happiness. You deserve someone who can love you and be true to you like you deserve. And that someone is not me.

I love you. I really do. But I just can’t hurt you anymore

Love,

Y/N

Your wedding ring had been on top of the letter and he had jumped into action. You couldn’t leave. Couldn’t say goodbye and decide without him having input in it. So he dressed and started his trek to find you but you were like a ghost. You knew how to be seen only when you needed to be found.

When he turns the corner of the living room, he feels the shift. See’s the way everyone watches him cautiously, their eyes flicking from the balcony back to him. You were here. And you probably weren’t alone.

“Where are they?” he sighs, trying to check his anger. Probably doing a crappy job of it.

Silence.

“They’re on the balcony, right?”

More silence.

He starts toward the door but Bruce is getting up, nervously flicking his eyes from Steve to outside.

“Maybe you shouldn’t do this now. Haven’t you caused enough damage.”

Steve sighs, placing a shaky hand on his shoulder.

“Not here to fight Banner. I just need to talk to them. Desperately.”

Bruce looks over to Natasha who gives a slight nod and sighs,

“If you say so.”

“I know so.” He says confidently, walking to the door and whipping it open. Trying not to let the pain that’s crusting his heart encase him. He had seen you give hugs to most men in the tower. His colleagues were all attractive people, men and woman alike and he was more than happy to see when you broke down your walls to share a little bit of affection.

But when he saw you with Bucky – something else tore through him. A rage of jealousy and pain. Probably because like Natasha said, you both just fit together. Even standing there, your face tear stained as Bucky held you, lips pressed to your forehead, his left arm softly placed on your hip as his right arm drew you in, there was something beautiful about the two of you together. You were a handsome couple together. Moved almost symbiotically. If you fidgeted, Bucky was sure to respond the same seconds later and vice versa. When you had fought them days ago, he had stopped to watch you move with Bucky because it was like a perfectly choreographed dance. You could anticipate each other. When you guys walked down the halls together, your bodies barely touching, Bucky’s face relaxed and happy, a permanent smile on your lips, it made him want that. It was like a couple in the movies that you wanted to emulate in real life. Wanted to steal from in order to obtain that bit of happiness.

You were both made for each other and he had barreled into that, breaking what had lived. And now, because of that simple mistake, he was on the verge of losing both of you.

“Mind if we talk?” Steve asks once Bucky’s moved past him and you nod, turning your back to him.

He stands there, watching you. The way the wind whips against your body, the relaxed way your shoulders sit as you play with the coffee mug in your hand. You smelled like Bucky and yet there was still the faint smell of you – a faint mixture of flora, vanilla and musk wrapped in one. In so many ways you were beautiful, strong and confident. So much different from Sharon, from Wanda or even Natasha.

And he loved you just as much as Bucky did.

“Steve, you don’t have to stand there. You could join me over here.” Your voice cuts through his thoughts as you look back at him, a genial smile on your face as your eyes rake at him and he knows what he has to do. He should make this decision for you. You deserved to be happy. He knew your history. Knew of the people who abused you as a child. Forced you to become something you didn’t want to become. How your parents had chosen money over your livelihood. Why you had hardened your heart and become a killer. What it felt like to realize that killing wasn’t going to solve the problems in the world and why you choose to leave that life.

He knew it because you would tell him when life was too down on him and he felt like he could speak to no one else about it. Not even Bucky, Sam or even Sharon. He couldn’t let his friends carry the weight of his problems. Except when he spoke to you it didn’t feel like a weight, but a cloud taking the stress away. When you told him that you knew exactly what it felt like to wake up and realize you had become something else by man’s hand, how people tried to manipulate your humanity – that was when he fell in love. It had challenged something in him that no matter how many things he tried to fill in his heart, he would always be alone.

When he was with you he didn’t feel alone. He felt whole. Felt complete. Felt like he could continue his mission to help others who may not have the capacity to help themselves.

You gave him that. He wanted you all for himself because that was the gift you gave him. If losing you would mean that he had to lose that feeling then he was willing to sacrifice it. You deserved happiness. Bucky deserved happiness, even if he still wanted to punch him in his face.

You both were made for each other. He’s confident in that.

Except, when he nears you, that feeling of confidence dissipates. He stands near you and you automatically move closer to him, your arms brushing as you stand in silence. He had watched you and Bucky sit for hours in silence, typically Bucky’s head in your lap as you work steadily on your laptop on the couch, not saying a word and yet somehow knowing exactly what was going on each other’s head. It fascinated him, mainly because when he was with you in silence he was uneasy. Unsure. Felt like the scrawny 17-year-old kid in Brooklyn who couldn’t fight for himself but always had to because it was the right thing to do. So, he filled the silence up with stories or talking through missions or his insecurities and you would listen, that same soft smile on your face as you operated around him.

But it wasn’t like you and Bucky.

“When you get lost in your head Steve,” You nudge his shoulder, your warmth wrapping up in his own and he can’t help the ease that comes with it, “You tend to get yourself in trouble. What’s going on in there?”

Your voice is gentle, has a playful tone but he can sense the worry behind it.

“I don’t think we should be married anymore.”

You tense up but your head doesn’t shift. You just watch him, your eyes bearing into his own.

“Is that what you want?”

“Isn’t it what you want?”

You sigh, heavy and long as you turn back to the trees.

“Steve, I don’t know what I want anymore. I love you, I really do. I love this feeling when I’m around you. I like the calm, like that you can be open and engaged and for once not carry the world on your shoulders when we hang out….” Your quirk your head to the side, debating your next words.

“But….Bucky….he’s……he’s just….I just feel….”

You’re at a loss of words and for once he knows how to fill it in,

“You feel like your whole when you’re with him.”

You turn back to him and nod. He tries to fight the tears threatening to pour out.

“I know. You always have been.”

“But Steve, I like being married to you. I know, I know it hasn’t seemed like it but I was happy when I woke up next you. Well…..I was confused and in pain,” he chuckles a bit at that. “But I was happy. I liked that you would get up earlier just so you could run with me in the morning, loved that you took the time to make me meals, loved that you learned how to use a scanner for me.” You laugh and shake your head and he can’t help but join in.

“I liked all of that because it made me feel a certain way. You make me feel a certain way. You give me hope, you remind me that you can be broke and still be okay. And that’s why I don’t know what to do Steve, because that was the feeling only Bucky had pulled out of me. I feel vulnerable, exposed. I feel like we woke up in Vegas and there’s this huge ripple effect that just keeps going and I want it to end for our sanity. We can’t keep doing this.”

The tears are coming back. He has never seen you so emotional about anything, trained to tame that emotion and his heart breaks. Because if he had just pushed you away that night three weeks ago, pushed you into the arms of Bucky, this would be a different story. You’d probably still be snuggled in bed with Bucky, both of you in happy bliss, finally saying everything what the world knew.

Three weeks ago, Bucky had finally caved in and admitted to him and Sam how he felt. Even after getting drunk on Asgardian ale, he denied his feelings. But something happened three weeks ago and he wanted the world to – the world being Sam and Steve.  Steve figured he couldn’t help it - had never seen Bucky so in love. He knew Bucky tried to wipe it away by sleeping with women, trying to paint your relationship black so you would hate him and go to Steve. Knew that he didn’t think he was good enough for you, that he would somehow tarnish you... But every time he tried that, he always ended back at square one.

Utterly in love with you.

Despite being wrapped up in your spell, despite the heavy feeling in his heart, Steve knows that he’ll find love again. It may not be as strong as it is with you, may not be as pure and natural. But it will come for him. He’s not sure if Bucky will ever find someone who will love him as much as you do. Not because he couldn’t. He could find someone yesterday.

Because he knew, like you both knew, that you were Bucky’s soulmate.

“Let’s go through with the divorce. Then you can….Bucky and you….”

Your eyes furrow together and you place your hand over his own and it’s like electricity is zapped through it.

Why does love hurt so much?

“You don’t want a divorce Steve.”

“I want my wife to be happy. I want to be able to talk to my best friend again. If this is the price then so be it.”

You watch him carefully for a minute, before you lean in and kiss him. And then he’s gone. Kissing you was like feeling at home again. Reminded him of laying out in the sun, or cuddling next to someone you love. Peaceful and right.

He can’t help but to deepen it, his hands getting caught in your hair as his tongue and teeth clash with yours and you moan, pulling away minutes later, resting your head on his forehead in shallow breaths.

“You’re so dangerous to love Steve. Dangerous because you’re also so right for me in all the wrong ways.”

You push off of the railing, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“Let me think about a divorce okay. Give me a week.”

And then you’re gone, leaving him with the more questions then he came with.