#the appointment went well i think. i fumbled my words to an ungodly amount and couldnt think properly
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guess who finally got to go to a therapist again today after losing their other one
ME!!!!!!!!!!!
#im so sorry that happened youre really strong#o get through it#afterwards i had to walk back to my mums which was around 20 mins#i just ended up playing fine by lemon demon on repeat to calm me down lmao i didnt have earbuds so i just played it out loud while walking#stayed at her work for the rest of the day helping her and got back home at dark#the appointment went well i think. i fumbled my words to an ungodly amount and couldnt think properly#i barely could keep eye contact and just ending looking all over the room and then just wall. ty wall. was just slumped in the chair adsfgh#it was weird having to tell someone about myself#and whats happened in my life#while i was talking i was just like damn huh that did actually happen to me#i guess ive just repressed a lot of stuff and then having to bring it all back up again and trying to explain it as well was just weird#like when i told her about some of the stuff that happened to me during school she was like etc and it was weird because i dont really see#t but i just feel like she shouldnt be saying that to me. i dont know it just feels weird. i dont see it as anything even though it is some#hing i guess. like when she asked about me self harming i just said how it is because i guess to me its just nothing. even though i know se#f harm is not good to me it kinda doesnt feel like anything. its just yeah i do/did. nothing of it i just yeah. i need to figure out how to#feel again. thinking and understanding as well i suppose.#okay skaluli shut up i dont care stop talking.
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