#the dream is to rumiko takahashi sensei things up XD

[triaelf9]

I was thinking last night before bed like...I wish I liked doing fully finished illustrations more and like, I enjoy it for VERY specific thing, but really, what I love is comics. And I love telling my own stories, the connection there is just something I can't explain, I just LOVE it

Without that connection, it's really hard to finish something, or get started on it, and it makes commissions REALLY hard for me to do, they're SUPER draining. It also makes things other than patreon/ko-fi hard to make stuff for b/c like, I just wanna comics. All day, every day.

But the more niche I realize that I am, the more it's like "ah crap, comics don't pay well, they take REALLY long to make, how am I gonna support my family on comics" and then it's like, well, I know where my heart lies at least, but the collapse of things is just always there

It's funny b/c I know that my stories wouldn't be what they are without my brain and how it works, but also I would be so much more productive and be able to work on more things and probably support my family better without the ADHD. So eyyy, it is what it is I guess lol XD

So...yay! But also like... oh no ^_^;;