#the one thing i genuinely love about dumblr is this exactly

[undermattsun]

will you ever write about k-pop men

look i’m not saying i will but i’m not saying i won’t but i’m also saying i have a kpop and ppop sideblog @underskz and who knows what will appear on there……..who knows

[crispy-chan]

jas darling, im so sorry you havent been feeling great. idk if we've interacted in the past, but i just wanted to say i love your blog! its always a pleasure seeing you come up on my dash, and i think i havent reached out before because you seem like a big blog and i didnt want to bother you. but it appears you want interaction so hi!! how are you??

im sorry to hear about your friend cancelling, im sure since they keep reaching out, they truly do want to connect with you, if they didnt like you anymore, theyd just ignore you, yeah? so maybe things keep coming up. it sucks, but hopefully youll get through it. maybe try and organise something smaller, if sleepovers consistently dont work? like meet up for lunch or dinner, watch a movie and then leave before people have to sleep. i know one of my friends has anxiety over people sleeping over so we generally just do everything we would with a sleepover, but leave before 10 or whatever. it might not work, but worth a try?

anyway i hope you feel a little brighter soon, know that even if it seems like people always put you second, there are people that care about you and want to spend time with you, even if theyre not very good at showing it. and if all else fails, you have us tumblr gremlins to keep you company

aelia <3

hello <3

i also don't think we have directly interacted, but i do remember seeing you in my notifs and perhaps even on my dash o.O

anyways, first of all, thank you <33 i'm really grateful for you reaching out to me. i feel like i'm just a broken record when i keep saying that half of the fun of writing is the interactions (and by that i don't mean only feedback!)

that's really sweet of you to say, i appreciate it <3 i'm just always confused when ppl call me a big blog and idk if i should be honored or if i should laugh T_T bcs i have no idea what makes people think that. for me, big blogs are the ones with thousands of followers who get all the asks, write really good stuff and actually create nice banners lmfao </3

but please, trust me when i say you're never bothering anyone!

we're all here on dumblr dot com writing ff or creating gifs, i think that speaks for itself T_T i feel like this is an escape for most of us or a way to further advance our goals in life (for the ppl who want to write profesh) but i genuinely don't think any writer/cc would be bothered by interactions, trust me <3

i'm doing pretty well ig, just a tad frustrated but what's new :>

but tbh, i'm hoping that what you say is true but it's starting to feel like it isn't... she's the only person who i really ever do sleepovers with so it isn't anything new, just that our plans never work out nowdays. it sucks bcs i know that in between the two of us having to cancel out plans, she hangs out/sleeps over at other people so like not to be that insecure bitch but i'm staring to fear that she just doesn't want to spend time with me...

thank you though, and i mean it. i'm genuinely crying right now idk what's wrong with me. i'm such an emotional person but reading this has brought me to tears.

i hope you know how much i appreciated you reaching out <33 i never want to force these things out of people but it seems like people just avoid me on purpose sometimes, ngl. my self esteem isn't exactly the highest even though i sometimes act all high and mighty...

thank you... i'm grateful to all tumblr gremlins, just letting you know :>

[thatfanficstuff]

Meetings (Part 2) - Sherlock

Pairing: Sherlock x ex!Reader

warnings: not really

A/N: I will link part one in the comments because dumblr is dumb.

***

As if losing Sherlock wasn’t bad enough, John had let it slip that he had an inkling that Sherlock hadn’t been serious about your relationship but he’d never said anything to you. So, you hadn’t talked to one of your best friends in several weeks. Truth be told you’d always been a bit of a loner, but you’d gotten used to having Sherlock around and to seeing John all the time. Suddenly, you felt very alone.

You hadn’t heard from your brother since the day he told you why Sherlock was really interested in you but that wasn’t unusual. You didn’t approve of most of his choices and he was more than aware of it. You were sat at your favorite table in the little café you frequented, your computer open in front of you, but you hadn’t written a word in days. Your heart still hurt too much you supposed. If you didn’t pull yourself together you were going to miss your deadline.

Someone sat in the seat opposite you and you glanced up in surprise. Mycroft Holmes, appearing as regal as ever, looked over you with dark eyes and a frown on his face. You frowned and leaned back in your seat. You’d only met the man a handful of times while you were still with Sherlock and you had no idea what he could possibly want with you. 

“You are well?” he finally asked.

“As well as I can be given the circumstances. What can I do for you, Mycroft?” If he was here to plea on his brother’s behalf you were going to lose it. It wouldn’t be the first person Sherlock had sent to talk to you, but it seemed so out of character for the man in front of you, you didn’t want to chase him off until you heard what he had to say.

He cleared his throat and pursed his lips. “I need your help.”

Your brows flew up in surprise. “You need my help?”

His tongue darted out to lick his lips. “To be more precise, Sherlock needs your help.”

You huffed in annoyance. “Well, that’s unfortunate for Sherlock.” You grabbed your belongings and stood. “Goodbye, Mycroft.”

A hand on your arm stopped you. “Just hear me out. Please.”

You swallowed past the lump in your throat and while you didn’t move toward the door, you also made no move to resume your seat.

“If it makes any difference, he doesn’t know I’m here. I came on my own behalf as well as his.”

You nodded once and sat back down. If nothing else, you could hear him out and appease your own curiosity. “Talk.”

He glanced down briefly before looking up to meet your gaze. “Sherlock has always been rather emotional.”

You arched a brow but said nothing. Mycroft may very well believe his brother emotional compared to himself. They were both far removed from the normal human spectrum of feelings.

When you didn’t respond, Mycroft cleared his throat. “My brother has often struggled with self-destructive behavior though it had been some time since his last episode. He believes dulling his emotions heightens his mental abilities. Of course, all he is doing is destroying himself and taking his brain with him.”

You frowned. John had mentioned Sherlock’s addiction issues to you before but you found it hard to believe someone so smart could be so stupid. “Are you saying that Sherlock is using again?”

Mycroft pursed his lips and nodded once. “I am and I believe you to be the only person that may be able to reach him.”

“Why would you even think that? He lied to me Mycroft and used me in an attempt to find my brother. I mean nothing to him so why would you think he would care?” It broke your heart all over again to say the words and you were proud of yourself that you made it through without your voice breaking.

He shook his head. “You are wrong, Y/N. My brother cares for you deeply. Your estrangement has nearly broken him.”

“I’m sorry, but I don’t believe you.” You couldn’t believe him because if you did, then all the things you’d told yourself to get through the last few weeks would be a lie and you’d slowly fall apart.

“Your lack of belief does not make it any less true I’m afraid.” He sighed. “Just talk to him. That is all I ask. Do that and I will never bother you again.”

The silence stretched as he awaited your answer. “All right, Mycroft.”

***

You pulled your jacket more tightly around you and knocked on the door to 221B. Mrs. Hudson swung the door open and immediately pulled you into her arms. “Oh, Y/N. Thank goodness you’re here. He’s got me worried sick.”

“Hello, Mrs. Hudson.” You patted her lightly on the back and pulled away.

She wrung her hands together. “He’s just been so distraught since you left. And—”

You placed a hand on her shoulder to cut her off. “It will be fine, Mrs. Hudson.” You didn’t give her a chance to respond before you headed up the stairs. You loved the woman but all your energy was already expended just keeping you moving forward.

After taking a deep breath, you knocked on the door to Sherlock and John’s flat. As expected, John was the one to answer. His eyes grew wide when he saw you. He offered a hesitant smile. “It’s good to see you, Y/N.”

You nodded once. “John.”

He glanced over his shoulder before looking back to you. “Are you here to see me or…” he trailed off.

“Mycroft asked me to come.”

“Ah, I see. Well, I’ll just make myself scarce then, shall I?” He grabbed his jacket off a hook by the door and slipped out with a nod.

You stepped into the flat and shut the door behind you. Sherlock was in his chair, fingers steepled in front of him as he stared off into space. He didn’t even glance in your direction. “If that was a client, I hoped you informed them we weren’t taking any cases for the foreseeable future.”

You didn’t respond, instead using the opportunity to look over your former fiancé. The skin beneath his eyes was dark with fatigue and he was more than a little disheveled. You wondered when he’d last cleaned himself up. But nothing about the man in front of you screamed addiction. There were no obvious indications that he was using again.

“John, are you going to—” His eyes fell on you then and he was on his feet in seconds. He closed his robe and tied the belt before raking his hand through his hair in an effort to bring some sort of order to it. “Y/N. I didn’t realize you were here. Why are you here?”

You arched a brow but still said nothing as you were finding it difficult to decide exactly what you wanted to say to him.

“I mean…” He huffed out a breath. “I thought you never wanted to see me again. What changed your mind?”

“Your brother.”

“Mycroft?” He was unable to hide his genuine surprise.

“He’s under the impression you’re using again. Are you?”

His brow furrowed. “What? Of course not.”

“I’ll just be going then,” you said and turned toward the door. Sherlock darted in front of it to block your way. You crossed your arms over your chest as you looked up at him.

“Just…since you’re here let me say what I need to say. Please.”

You turned your gaze to the floor uncertain if you wanted to listen or not. You were still broken, still fragile. One wrong move on his part and you’d shatter all over again.

He reached out a hand then let it drop. “Please, Y/N. Five minutes. That’s all I’m asking.”

Instead of answering, you walked over to sit in John’s chair.

There was a brief pause as Sherlock processed that you were actually going to hear him out. “Yes, fantastic,” he said as he stepped away form the door. “Can I get you something? Tea, maybe?”

You darted your eyes up to meet his gaze. “You’re losing time, Sherlock.”

“Of course.” He took his seat with a flourish then leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees. “When I first met you, I had no idea who you were. By the time I asked you to dinner, I knew you were Andrew’s sister. And, yes, that is why I asked you out.”

Your heart twinged with the admission. It wasn’t anything you didn’t already know but the reminder hurt just the same.

“But it only took me a couple of dates to realize that you rarely heard from him and you weren’t likely to be of any more help than anyone else.”

“So, what? You kept dating me on the off chance he’d show up, or I’d let something useful slip?” Bitterness dripped from your words.

“No. I kept dating you because you fascinated me. Everything I discovered about you only made me want to know more. When I realized that I would never grow bored with you, I asked you to marry me. Our relationship may have begun because of your brother, but he had nothing to do with why it continued, I promise you.” His tone was practically begging you to believe him. And you wanted to. God, did you want to believe everything he was telling you, but if it was just another ruse, you wouldn’t survive the heartbreak again.

“How do I know any of this is the truth, Sherlock? Maybe you’re just saying what you think I want to hear to win me back. Maybe you’re still using me to find Andrew.” Your chest ached and you sucked in a ragged breath.

“I already found him and turned the information over to the police.”

You weren’t particularly surprised to hear your brother was in jail again. You were surprised he hadn’t contacted you to ask for bail though. Maybe he believed you when you told him the last time was it. No more money. You shrugged. “Am I supposed to be grateful for that? Thank you, Sherlock for arresting my brother. All is forgiven?”

He gave a sharp shake of his head. “Of course not. I merely wanted you to know that finding him cannot possibly be the reason I want you because he has already been found and I still yearn for you. Please, Y/N. I should have told you from the beginning that I was looking for your brother. I should have given you no reason to doubt my feelings for you were sincere. Are sincere. I love you, Y/N. Nothing will change that.”

Moisture flooded your eyes and you closed them to keep the tears at bay. “You broke my heart.”

“If it helps, I broke mine as well. Please give me another chance. I beg of you.”

A tear ran down your cheek. Sherlock’s thumb was there immediately to wipe it away. God, you’d missed him. When he would have pulled away, your hand found his and pressed it against your cheek. “No more secrets, Sherlock.”

“No more secrets.”

You opened your eyes to look at him then and found nothing but sincerity and hope shining back at you. You leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss against his lips. He hooked a hand around your neck and pressed his forehead against yours. “I missed you.”

“I missed you, too.” Before either of you could say anything else, Sherlock’s phone rang interrupting your moment.

He huffed out a breath and glanced at his phone. He rolled his eyes and answered. “Mycroft, would you mind telling me why you told Y/N that I was using again?”

“It was for your own good, Sherlock. You haven’t been yourself since the end of your relationship.” His voice was distorted, but you could still hear easily enough.

Sherlock’s gaze narrowed. You knew that look. He’d just figured something out. “Is this because I wouldn’t take the case you wanted me to?”

“Don’t be absurd. However, if you and Y/N have resolved your issues I do wish you would reconsider.”

You pulled Sherlock’s phone from his hand. “Goodbye, Mycroft,” you said and disconnected the call. You sat the phone aside and stood. Sherlock’s eyes trailed your every movement. You held out a hand.

“Come along, Sherlock. Let’s get you cleaned up.”

He took your hand and intertwined your fingers as he got to his feet. “Dare I hope that you intend to help?”

“Well, you obviously can’t take care of yourself so someone’s got to.” You tugged him down the hall to his bathroom, grinning the whole way.