#then I will love you forever <3 humour me enlighten yourself

[hella1975]

HE SAID IT’S ALL IN YOUR HEAD AND I SAID SO’S EVERYTHING BUT HE DIDNT GET IT

[uksugarbabyxxx]

A Belated Update (The Good, The Bad, The Ugly of Being a Sugar Baby)

I’ll start off with a quick update, I’m now happily engaged to a great guy I met through friends, we’re living together in a beautiful home and we’ve just found out we’re expecting our first child together, our hearts are overflowing with joy and we cannot wait to meet him/her❤️

**I say the following in hopes of enlightening other ladies who want to / are practicing the sugar baby lifestyle. This is my story and I intend to tell the good and the bad, it’s quite personal, too, might I add.

It all started when I was 18, my mother whom I was living with at the time, was struggling financially, thus resulting in what I believe to be depression though she never got clinically diagnosed. I watched my own mother, a woman who I thought couldn’t be shaken by anything, brought to her knees by financial hardship, I witnessed her crumble and it was the scariest most unsettling thing. I can’t remember EXACTLY how I found out about the Sugar Baby lifestyle but anyway, i signed myself up to SA with the excitement that I’d be able to make easy money to give to my mother which would in turn mend her situation and, in a way, fix her.

My first meet was a black guy; skinny looking with glasses, very unattractive but promised me £500 just to meet. Of course I said yes. We met a few miles from my home in a restaurant and I was immediately uncomfortable, he began to touch my arms/legs/hair. This guy had no concept of social skills or personal space whatsoever. This being my first meet I had no idea If this was normal behaviour or not, anyway when I told him I couldn’t stay the night with him, he got angry and only gave me half of the promised money. Which I then spent £60 of in a taxi home and gave the rest to my mother. The experience unsettled me but I decided to continue.

My first actual arrangement and second meet was a half cast guy; small, kind of chubby, polite. However, he was extremely cheap. I was given £200 per meet to stay over at his and we had to have sex more than twice otherwise I wouldn’t get the money. I was basically his personal prostitute now I look back, but at the time I just assumed that that was how this thing worked. I felt disgusting each time, each time I’d think of a happy place or a film I enjoyed to try and take my mind off of what was going on. Despite this, I lived a nice life, I would meet him 3-4 times a week, give some money to my mother and then shop with the rest, although I could never get over how dirty I felt. The arrangement eventually ended when he moved back to London due to his career.

After this I didn’t really have a long lasting arrangement, a few guys who’d bought me nice gifts, given me cash, holidays etc. As I got more experienced, I learned my worth and how to talk more money and gifts out of men. But I could never escape the loneliness, I had copious amounts of money but no love, I had lost sight of why I started doing it in the first place. I have made 3k in a day before and done nothing more than a hand job, I think I was good at this lifestyle because I ‘sold’ friendship, somebody intelligent to chat with, a confidant as well as being pretty to look at. I’ve been gifted iPhone’s, holidays, amazing experiences, handbags, clothing, shoes but the buzz of a material item doesn’t last long. Sooner or later the buzz would wear off and I’d be back to feeling lonely, that’s not to say I didn’t appreciate the gifts btw.

Anyway to cut the story short, The cherry on top of the cake was earlier in 2016, a guy I met on SA but nothing ever came off as we ended up being good friends, often discussing economics and politics as they’re favourites of ours, invited me on a holiday with him and his friend to Monaco. It took me some persuading but I eventually agreed. He sold it to me as being ‘5 days full of interesting conversation, good food and good company’. After a while it actually started to seem as though it’d be enjoyable, a little while away whilst I could eat (my fave thing to do btw, surprised I’m 8st 5 still), converse, and get some sun. Upon arrival I instantly felt uneasy, a feeling I knew all too well as a result of my first ever meet. Unfortunately, at that point I couldn’t pin point what was up with me and so just put it down to excitement (? Weird, I know). Fast forward 2 days, its night time, we’re walking back from a restaurant after a lovely supper and a chat. The route back goes along a beach, I told them I needed the toilet and they said it’d be fine to walk along the beach and go there (disgusting? Yes. Did drunk me care? No), so I did and as I began walking back, in near pitch darkness might I add, the guy who invited me, whom I’ll call Captain Dickhead for privacy reasons of course, jumps on top of me, no joke, I hit the floor, he begins kissing me, his full weight on top of me I’m unable to move or speak due to his tongue being in my mouth. I’m frozen in shock, fear and a What the fuck is going on kind of thing, he pulls away and I instantly say 'I think I’ve dropped my phone can you help me find it a second’ I don’t know why I said that but clever Me as it made him get off me and begin looking for the phone that was still in my skirt pocket. Still shocked and freaked out, I walked back to my room to get into bed and think about what the fuck was going on because he clearly thought I was here to fuck him. The next morning I’m reluctant to come out of my room, think I was still a little shell shocked and scared, I’m alone in a foreign country with only $500 on me with this man and my flight home isn’t for another few days. When I finally emerged it was as if nothing had happened, I assumed maybe he had just had too much to drink and he was embarrassed by it as I was, so I didn’t mention it and got on with the day as I had been the past few days. I walked around the town, face timed a few friends, didn’t tell them about what had happened of course in case they worried, over dinner that night we had a great chat about the economy and poverty, I thought all was going well. I got showered in my room, climbed into bed when I got a knock on my door. I opened it to see him, with a clear hard on, at my door, I’m like oh fuck here we go again with the weird stuff, but again I’m frozen. He barges in and begins kissing my neck and groping me, so I don’t have to get into the horrible details long story short I told him no, he had a hissy fit and continued to have his way kinda thing, then got up and went back to his own room, I was well don’t even have words for how I felt afterwards. I cried, texted my friends about it and they told me to leave right away. I was in absolute hysterics, confusion and shock. I left the next morning. As I was leaving, he chased me down the corridor and handed me £3500 i looked at him like ??? WOT is this, he noticed my questioning expression and said 'isn’t that why you’re here? You know the site we met off?’ I was even more confused at this point, granted we did meet on that site but at no point had anything sexual or arrangement type ever been discussed, not even when we first began texting after exchanging numbers.. this experience will stick with me forever. Absolutely mind numbing. After this I closed down my profile and have never returned to the lifestyle. You never truly know someone’s intentions with you, as in this case.

Epilogue(?) to the story: I met my fiancé through friends and we instantly clicked. Same taste in almost everything, same sense of humour etc. I fell in love almost instantly, the feeling of love after enduring years of feeling lonely in the name of money was empowering, like a warm hug kind of or when you’re really sleepy and finally fall into bed and nap. Although it may be seen as a bad attribute, he is quite feminine in the way he is loving and caring. A thing I haven’t seen before in a man, it was refreshing. We are now engaged, living in a beautiful home together with our French bulldog, Sus (named by me of course💅🏽) and expecting our first child together. I couldn’t be happier with how my life is, I’m truly content. He is not rich for any of you that may be wondering, nor is he poor. We live comfortably and fairly luxurious I would say. Although I earn more than him. Our baby is due September the 10th 2017. Overall, I’m thankful for the experience of being a Sugar Baby, it has made me grow in ways leading a normal life could not, it has made me cry and laugh and smile and a whole load of other things. However, I look back on the reason I started it and I pray that my children don’t have to go through what I went through just to try and help me. I pray they’re never disrespected or 'priced up’ by dirty old men who get a kick out of fucking young girls. I pray my children never force themselves to do anything they do not wish to do just for the promise of money. I pray my children NEVER do what I did or anything of the sort.

I want to wish my followers and anyone who see’s this good luck. please remember to know your worth and then add 10. Please remember to never allow yourself to be disrespected or humiliated. Please remember to never let yourself get too deep and forget about what really matters in life. Please never get to a point where you feel numb. Please please please never force yourself to have sex or do anything you, are not comfortable with; there are ways of extracting money from men that don’t involve sex and are relatively easy. Please remember to look after yourself mentally.

This will be my last post off this account. I wish everyone the best of luck and safety throughout their Sugar Baby journey. May you never feel alone or unhappy❤️I know this story has been wild with a lot of twists and turns but I’ve told it as it was and tried to include every detail I could, everything that made me happy and everything that made me not so happy.