#there's something called suspension of disbelief and contrary to what people seem to think

[qwanderer]

What makes a Loki a Loki?

Loki is called upon to be a lot of different people. He’s been raised on Asgard, and that’s formed some of the more basic aspects of his personality and values, but at the same time he has attributes that have been consistently discouraged and pushed down by that culture, and we can see them step forward as he moves into situations where they are encouraged.

Throughout the canons, there are a lot of Lokis. Siege Loki, Lady Loki, Kid Loki and his murderer, Ikol, King Loki, and the God/Goddess of Stories. The earlier aspects I know only by secondhand information, but I’m very familiar with Loki from Young Avengers and Agent of Asgard, some of my favorite comics of all time. But I know some basic facts - the way the earliest Loki was a quintessential comic book villain full of pure simple theatrical mischief and ridiculous schemes, the fact that Lady Loki was a somewhat more sinister appropriator of bodies for her own use.

In my view, MCU!Loki has, at the very least, the same capacity to shift personalities depending on the circumstances, and I haven’t yet seen anything in the Loki show that’s thrown my suspension of disbelief with regards to his characterization.

I’ve seen some people rebel at the idea of Loki gleeful over the destruction of Pompeii and the causing of chaos it allowed, but it reminds me of some meta I wrote very early on in my years of meta-writing in the MCU. The values Loki was raised with, Asgardian values, sometimes treat death very lightly, especially death in battle, especially human or otherwise non-Aesir death. In the Aesir context, at least to a certain extent and certainly in terms of what we’ve seen Odin teach his sons onscreen, violence is honorable, fighting is an adventure, lives are cheap and Valhalla is the ultimate goal.

I think a lot of the central conflict of Loki’s character is that he follows some of these principles to their logical conclusions in situations that Aesir values never meant them to cover. If life is unimportant, then it won’t be so bad if I tell Thor that Odin is dead. If the throne of Asgard has dominion over all the Nine Realms, then why shouldn’t I rule Midgard?

But he also shifts the way he acts to suit the situation. He is a shifter, it’s what he does. On Asgard, he is expected to be a warrior, a dignified prince, a companion and support for his brother. The values are bravery and dignity, and so a lot of what he projects there is bravado and elegance, which are close enough for him to get by.

When he is taken by Thanos, the only things Thanos wants and values are power and death. So Loki becomes an avatar of power and death. He carries that with him to Earth, because he is still very much under the jurisdiction of Thanos. But he very quickly learns how to use and manipulate Earth values, like wit and pathos. They seem to fit him better than the others, and he carries them through the other movies and the different frameworks he finds himself in.

He also tends to carry Asgard with him, the knowledge that he’s a prince, destined to be a king, that he needs to carry himself a certain way, with that elegance, dignity and bravado.

When I see Loki in the first episode of the show, I recognize him as some of the deepest, most quintessential parts of Loki that have only been allowed to peek out on occasion before. And that is due to manipulation on Mobius’s part - Mobius makes it very clear what he expects of Loki. To get down to the very basic levels of him and find out his motivations, what makes him fundamentally himself - “What makes Loki tick?” There’s a quiet void there, and the only thing that’s being asked of Loki, for once, is that he sit down and fill that void with words - the truest and most sincere words possible.

There’s a clear and interesting divide between that phase for Loki, and the phase we see in episode two - Mobius has stopped providing that space, and in the interim, he’s made it very clear what he expects Loki to be like, what mold he’d prefer the trickster to fit into.

The hard-working, lovable scamp.

Loki is hiding his deepest self again, which we all do most of the time. Loki can’t feel that deeply and express that freely all the time. Because of the environment he’s in - which may not be any more or less free than any of the other environments he’s experienced - he expresses himself in a particular way. He is the hard-working, mischievous scamp Mobius has been pushing him to be.

I don’t think he’s any more or less himself than he’s ever been - he’s simply responding to different pressures. And the pressures of this episode press him very hard into the Neal Caffrey mold. Which is an interesting mold in itself - when I was writing White Collar fic, I made a point to distinguish who Neal was when he was with Peter and who he was under different circumstances - prison, witness protection, with Mozzie, with Kate. (I wrote an autistic Kate, and had him most freely himself when he was with her.)

Like Neal Caffrey, the Episode 2 Loki is treading a line between behaviors that will get him things because he’s useful and compliant, behaviors that will demonstrate that he’s into minor trickery for fun now and might not be getting up to anything bigger, and those bigger tricks that are definitely still running in the background. It’s the obvious balance for a trickster on a leash with an indulgent bureaucrat.

You can see that it’s a facade in the way that he is near tears when he sees the Ragnarok paperwork, but when he brings it to Mobius’s attention and Mobius expresses his sympathies, Loki says “Yes, very sad,” and then dismisses it in favor of moving on to his mischievous enthusiasm over the resulting theory he’s had.

Like all good lies, it’s built out of truth, so when I see this Loki, I see pieces of the Loki I know, just put together a little differently, which is how Loki seems to do it.

Although he’s not free as he might hope to be, and in fact threading a narrow path between a very constricting set of pressures, I do still think he’s enjoying the dropped expectations of dignity and elegance. I think he’s enjoying being in a culture that encourages him to be a geek. To go on about the things he’s passionate about and his areas of expertise. And I think that’s a lot of what unsettles people about this Loki, because that elegance and dignity have carried everywhere else with him. And I’m not going to argue that the TVA are doing anything nice for him - quite the contrary - but I still do enjoy seeing him able to be the geek he’s always had the inclination to be, in the right circumstances.

It makes me wonder, a little, how much his mother is on his mind right now, after the first episode, because if I had a guess, the last time he’s felt free to be this enthusiastic and expressive about his interests is in magic lessons with her as a child.

So. The other variant.

We know from the Lady Loki comics arc that Loki can possess other people’s bodies over the long term, and we know from kid!Loki and his murderer interacting in YA that the original occupant of a body can sometimes hang around and talk back, if only as a figment of his imagination. We know from most incarnations that Loki can go to a lot of dark places if the circumstances push him to it.

As I’ve said before, I’m intrigued by the question the difference between the two variants poses - how much different can two Lokis be before they are no longer meaningfully the same person?

We’ve got clues on both sides, of course - our scamp on a leash saying “I wouldn’t do this to myself” on the side of them being not the same person, and the vengeful goddess he’s chasing saying “I was afraid they’d found a better version of me” on the side of them being the same person.

The more I think about it, the more I’m willing to predict that this vengeful goddess is, in some way, an incarnation of Loki. But (be warned, I’m going to reference Stephenie Meyer now) it could be in as small a way as something out of The Host - a stolen body’s original personality fighting dirty against the invading spirit.

If this is something based on the character of Sylvie from the comics, it could still be anything from a person - human or Asgardian - chosen and manipulated by Loki to do his bidding, to a full-on possession, or even a body constructed for a specific purpose but developing its own personality traits.

We know this variant is a body hopper, and Mobius’s briefing mentioned that it’s an inherent ability of most Lokis to shapeshift, so there are a lot of potential explanations for this unfamiliar shape.

But the differences between the variants could also stem mostly from different experiences.

The only thing I’m at all sure of is that this variant has also been tortured by Thanos. It’s possible that she branched earlier - that the wild desperation of having freshly escaped Thanos translated into being dragged into the TVA like a cornered wildcat, on the raggedy edge and desperate enough to go all-out to get out of the collar while still in the custody of the minute men. Then, as she became familiar with the TVA in concept and execution, developed opinions and built a personality around taking them down, taking them apart the way she wished she could do to Thanos, the way Thanos did to her.

But she could also have branched later - after the destruction of Asgard, or when Thanos appeared on the refugee ship. After the worst has happened to her people. With some preexisting notion that time could have gone differently, that some things that had happened should not be allowed to happen.

I have a weak spot for interactions between incarnations of Loki in the comics, so I am incredibly eager to see the MCU’s take on this.

[dreamteamfanblog]

Wilbur Soot’s villain arc was fucking WONDERFULLY set up and was actually what really got me into the Dream Smp

I still haven't really watched many streams from the independence war, much less the disc war. I've seen lots of clips and heard lots of quotes and read the wikis on them and watched summary videos and know the baseline of the story (well enough to analyze actions of the characters based on vods i've never seen in their entirety) but like...I didn't...watch most of the streams even up to the election. I watched Wilbur's video on the war, one vod from when Dream declared war, Wilbur's videos on the election, part of the disc war (the fortnight build battle and thats it), a few clips like the Eret betrayal (who hasn't seen that one?) and just read about the rest or listened to what the characters involved say about it now.  Like. I watched one vod and a few youtube videos regarding the Disc War and Independence War (and somehow still picked up the story in great detail but that's besides the point) then like...Skeppy and Bad's Dream Smp videos...then like a lightswitch got flipped every single stream Tommy, Tubbo, or Wilbur made at around the time of Wilbur's descent into madness, then expanded to every single stream Quackity or Fundy make around the time they turned on Schlatt. And like. You don't really need to watch everything to get the story, I like to think I have fairly good grasp on the events and characters involved and I missed like...every stream up until Wilbur's villain arc

I think Wilbur (streamer/writer/actor) knew from the start that his character wasn't a good guy and I think the fact that he so clearly cut out everything that makes that apparent highlights this fact. I've always thought Wilbur wasn't a great guy, I mean, as I said, during the first war I watched exclusively bits from Dream's point of view and afterwards heard him explain the situation to other people and was like "uh? yeah? dream was right?". I thought that we were just meant to extend a suspension of disbelief to the situation, though. Dream never felt like a bad guy to me (at the time, he is now, obviously) but L'manburg was very clearly the side we were meant to root for and even outsiders thought Dream was wrong (skeppy outright called the man a colonizer ajfaigsglisf). That's one of the reasons I didn't watch the Smp, because as much as I can extend a healthy level of leniency as to what we're meant to think, having us view somebody who's very clearly super shady as a 'hero' didn't sit right with me and I kinda thought it was..bad writing. Which I wanted no part in. I watched the election videos to see what all the fuss was about and my opinion still didn't change. Quackity seemed like an asshole out of context and Schlatt was clearly awful and to be honest Fundy and Niki felt like a joke so I did root for Wilbur and Tommy to win, but I couldn't help noting the fact that...Wilbur still seemed like a bad guy to me. Tommy can be excused for being hotheaded and going along with whatever Wilbur says, he's a kid and his guardian who he trusts and follows is clearly informing his behavior here, I picked up on that even at the time, but Wilbur...well I thought him rigging the election was meant to be just another thing we extent the suspension of disbelief to- like the drug cartel thing which didn't stop him from being the 'hero' of that war. But then..his pride and refusal to share the throne lost him the election..

I still didn't think they'd go all out and confirm the obvious fact that Wilbur was a bad guy, however at least some of the flaws in his character had to be intentional at this point. The way he rejected Quackity's offer to pool votes, brushing him off because Wilbur wanted it all to himself and then subsequently lost to somebody who was more willing to play the part and compromise, at least for the moment..as well as the fact that Wilbur was the one who decided to have an election in the first place when he's basically the George Washington of the nation and, to quote Hamilton (which they roleplayed throughout the first war), "As far as the people are concerned, you have to serve, you could continue to serve". He could have just kept being president but he decided to snuff out any debate of his power before it began by setting up (and then rigging) an election. As far as I was concerned Wilbur orchestrated his own downfall and it was at least partially meant to be that way. I was still annoyed they wouldn't all out condemn him, but I took a level of satisfaction in the idea that the plot holes i'd notice might have been intentional character design. AND THEN VILLAIN WILBUR HAPPENED AND I WAS THRILLED. That's when I was dragged full force into the fandom. Something i'd thought was bad writing was just a long con setup for the eventual outright villain arc. The reason Wilbur looked so good in the videos is because...of course he did. The fact that the bad things were cut out is the point, it was a long con setup, people were meant to see him as a hero, even if hesitantly (i sure did, i mean, i always held a bitter inward conviction that wilbur soot aint all he's cracked up to be, but at the time i thought it defiance of the smp's bad writing, not accurate analysis, and so i still begrudgingly admitted to him filling the narrative role of a 'hero' even despite my personal issues with this fact), Wilbur was portrayed to us as a hero because Wilbur's manipulative and knew how to weave a convincing story. He said he was the good guy and he convinced the people around him he was too and waited to see if that would be enough to get people to ignore the blatant evidence to the contrary only to hit everyone in the face with what he'd done during the full blown villain arc.

And I adore it. That's the reason I got so invested directly after his initial "what if villain" statement, the reason that's when I started making posts on the Dream Smp. Up till then i'd only vaguely glanced at it and treated everything surface level. I didn't get invested because it all seemed so...poorly done..but then the election arc just blew everything out of the water. It was brilliant.

They wrote a manipulative character so well he manipulated the audience, at least those who didn't think critically, and for those who did think about it, everything they noticed paid off incredibly! And that really solidified for me how good this show is. The way it rewards people who pay attention and how well thought out everything seems to be.

[quarterette]

Utawarerumono: The False Faces ep 13-25 Liveblog

Gonna just straight up do individual episode comments, since the second half is gonna be denser in content. As with the first half, this is a rewatch and will have spoilers for the games.

Opening Comments: Man there’s not much movement in the animation but its beautiful all the same.

Ep 13:

- *spit take* why are they sending Rulu? IDK if it was because the directors weren’t informed about the whole “baby of the family” detail because I can’t imagine Shis letting this happen

- Interesting how instead being of a secret force that Oshtoru sent, Haku and gang are now the accompanying force to Rulu and Atuy.

- I’ll be pleasantly surprised if Entua makes more sense in the anime than in the games

- oh wow Dekopompo is even worse in the anime, straight-up running off on his own.

Ep 14:

- I like how instead of Atuy catching the arrow the twins have a force field. Granted, it make Atuy even more of a non-entity

- the extreme long shots of the CGI soldiers are really nice. I don’t feel like we see the loss of formations as they come into contact with each other often in war anime

- why are the twins running like that - imo that way too much movement for dainty girls (maybe I’ve watched too much anime)

- wow they totally recontextualized retrieving Shinonon and cut down a lot of potential runtime.

- did they seriously remove Atuy’s bloodlust

- you know open-eyed Ougi is growing on me, him and Nosuri have such lovely eye color

- poor Maroro

Ep 15:

- I’m relieved that the adaptation art makes Raiko look less like Lelouch. Always seemed like lazy design to me, him and Mikazuchi look nothing alike.

- did they introduce the telepaths in MoD? I can’t remember.

- that triple-take of Zeguni dying was just silly. If it were one slice x3 it would have been fine but this... Oshtoru be flexing with that mountain.

- I never really felt calling Witsu an Eva was quite right but with the Akuruturuka.... yeah I see it.

- truly we are in the war arc proper now.

- Heh wouldn’t it have been interesting to have the proxies’ subservience kick in instead of having the twins shield Haku. Oh well missed opportunities. IMO it would have worked well with the accelerated timeline the anime needed to achieve.

- what is with the triple takes this episode

- ah haku wasn’t even able to save them gg

- post episode revisiting the VN comments:

they hint at the telepaths, and as I thought the Vurai razing the city wasn’t in the VN. It was a good showpiece and works with Vurai’s characterization, but messes with Haku’s as a cost - the VN suggests that Haku inherently can be ruthless (he suggests scapegoating Moznu for Anju’s kidnapping, which the anime totally skips over), while it looks like the anime is gonna use this mass destruction as the reason for steeling his heart. I can’t say I hate that the writers chose to have the main characters in the fray, but it definitely requires more suspension of disbelief that everyone got out okay compared to the VN.

- Interestingly we don’t see Oshtoru’s mech form at all. I do like the increased bro scenes between Mikazuchi and Oshtoru

Ep 16:

- Yeah we immediately feel the ripples of that last episode changing Haku’s trajectory... its a logical trajectory but... ugh. I’m not sure how I feel about such a contrary Haku. It wasn’t really a thing in the VN? So frustrating augh. Utawarerumono was never a story big on moralizing about war... and the anime writers aren’t doing a great job adding it in.

- I’m 99% sure they pulled some of Ukon’s lines for comforting Haku here from a conversation they had in the VN waaaayyy back around the gigiri fight, making the scene all the more frustrating. The concepts of powerlessness and loss of life is something that Haku had been introduced to the moment he woke up and had already been working on dealing with. I can’t say its an invalid take that he’d be shook over mass destruction (I mean, most people would) but it’s a sharp deviation from the VN.

- Oh wow they’re totally gonna retool the banquet to deal with haku’s trauma instead of him dealing with his memories of being the LAST OF HIS KIND aren’t they.

- yeah they did

- oh god don’t say the word seduce haku, rulu’s gonna die from blood loss

- lol i don’t remember the twins being tied up

- rulu is dead

- and now haku is dead too. I think only Ougi and Yakutowaruto escaped unscathed.

- this did give me the bro bonding that I had been missing in the show thus far. Not enough drinking scenes! like literally the VN is literally just baths and booze between the action lol

Ep 17:

- ah finally the flashback episode. lol all the crunchyroll comments are like “watch the first season”.

- haku calling his new buddies family... oof mito’s knowing gaze makes it all the much sadder

- Haku:”did you need to go that far” Mito: “lemme do it again with Tuskuru”

- hah “reposition your camera” nice, easy way to not show his face

- heh stares at your sister-in-law’s butt, that’s actually a pretty subtle hint without adapting any of the monologue from the VN that he kinda had feelings for her

- damn this is probably the most complete vision of the future we get in any medium

- hey to be fair the ameterasu blast was mutsumi and not exactly a product of mankind fighting each other - but it does go to show just how little Mito knew about what was actually going down

- to continue with my frustration, we see that haku is called out by his bro that he has a habit of “conceal don’t feel” so it makes his emo bit last episode even more jarring - though in hindsight I guess his depression comes less out of the blue for his friends now - its just that the reason is misattributed

- oof “make up for lost time”

- ooh I like the final scene with Woshis as the delegate to Tuskuru. The VN did fine without it but man what a cliffie for those watching the first time.

Ep 18:

- oof we’re not going to have any shinonon/kiwru antics are we

- man I can’t wait to see Benawi - he was my favorite chara in Uta1 after Touka

- wow they really did just ignore the fact that Kiwru is the prince of Ennakamuy and cut him out of the party

- dugh never mind I don’t like ougi’s open eyes here

- speaking of ougi they totally glossed over his role as reconnaissance

- and have they even mentioned that nosuri is trying to retake their clan’s name?

- cocopo still best bird

Ep 19:

- of course you’ll be sweaty haku, boro boro only wears that brown undershirt in tuskur smh

- i love how all of the dads we see dote on their daughters so much

- of course only now do they mention the fact that atuy and haku are drinking buddies and we just have to take it at face value

- actually seeing those sailor uniforms in action make atuy’s regret that much funnier, the stills don’t quite do it justice (though really, it’s the sound effects carrying the team)

- lol the background soyankekur antics are great

- cocopooooo noooo damn this romance with mukkur is great

Ep 20:

- huhu woshis was allowed down to the underground garden huh

- benawiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

- dang they didn’t use the hot air balloon ;-; so disappointing like if they do it this way they won’t even get to retake the supplies ;-;

- i guess its a good way to hint at kuon’s identity

- something is wrong with kurou’s face

- also where the fuck is nosuri - i know kiwru is a lost cause for this show but nosuri too? they really are trying to wipe out the tactics seen in the VN

- i do think the line about kurou’s line to kuon about “ripping the country in half” is nice - can’t remember if it was in the VN but at this point most of the good lines seem to be coming out of the VN

- ugh the twins are such a cop out, still think they should have went with the hot air balloon strategy

- we hardly knew ye mito

Ep 21:

- dang I’m pleasantly surprised by these CG soldiers

- bye bye munechika, still salty you can’t turn into a mech

- oof “I’m sure my mom was someone like you” this show lives and breathes on dramatic irony

- bye bye anju, what was the point of actually having oshtoru there when the tea was delivered? makes him seem more incompetent than he is, though entua was nowhere to be seen - imo for the best

- oshtoru, an honorable man through and through, giving up your mask, lowkey too honorable for your own good

- okay one of my favorite things is how regularly dekopompo is ignored during the generals’ council meetings; overlapping voices isn’t really a thing in the VNs due to its nature as a written medium first and foremost

- oh interesting Oshtoru’s men are coming to defend him that’s new

- oh no torture time ;-;

- post episode VN notes: ugh they also dropped the Woshis power grab of locking Dekopompo and Raiko outside of the gates

Ep 22:

- Yes go be a dad Yakuto and stop Nekone from doing stupid shit please oh please oh please

- Man they are seriously retooling oshtoru’s downfall aren’t they - wish it didn’t come off so crudely planned. Like, y’all know Oshtoru is loved by the people, did the generals not think some sort of rioting would happen if you let that info go public? Granted the original plot of having Entua sneak the info out is pretty contrived... but at least it better preserves the perceived competency of the generals by forcing a smaller timeframe in which everything goes down.

- man people watching this will be so confused next season when they realize Kiwru is a prince

- wut Kuon you should know you probably won’t be able to get info to the princesses once y’all leave. Good that Shinonon is going on ahead to Ennakamuy though.

- eh are they’re gonna try leaving by sea this time? even though Ennakamuy is in the mountains?

- secret tunnel ~ ♫

- aw no Evenkuruga reveal for Nosuri and Ougi. Though, I guess the anime never established that their base was in the Hakuorokaku basement...

- you know, since they just generalized the jamming barrier it’s kinda nice to see that the gang had to sneak in the hard way. IMO that’s one of the “game design justifies the plot” moments - the VN tries to keep everyone together so you can have all your unit options when fighting, but let’s be honest smaller strike teams work at times.

- oh hi Honoka, you’re not arrested here? guess not.

- oh god have they been translating Atuy’s “onii-san”s as “mister” this whole time? I can’t say that “love” was a better translation but that’s just tragic

- I wish we got more hints that haku actually has been doing some training (aka the SRPG parts of the game) rather than these random moments of competency and knocking out the guards.

- good god oshtoru your honorableness is gonna be the death of you. how can you trust Vurai. Seriously idk how it’s gonna turn out here, but Vurai literally wants to see Anju dead in the VN.

- ok i lie splitting the party was a terrible idea. they are taking way too long to convince oshtoru to take a stand. these men are way too stubborn. jk its fine

- whelp there goes the boat

- aw yeh Yakutowaruto lets go

Ep 23:

- Yakutowaruto continues to be a badass

- ugh and of course Oshtoru gets hurt, and he’s not gonna tell anyone

- ok I’m enjoying how acrobatic these twins are

- the plot change ripples continue to be seen; there’s no distractions at the gates since dekopompo is inside the gates. Raiko’s strategy stuff does make for good tension tho.

- ugh the fact that Soyankekuru is in the capital is gonna complicate things. The moment Atuy is seen to defect he’s screwed. That’s gonna change the timeframe of things second half.

- lol Kuon god powers time, hope there weren’t too many casualties. Poor Nosuri now has two sacks of people to deal with...

- ok I feel like I’m seeing more poor art quality this episode

- wow it seems that everyone’s on board for some arson today

- bruh don’t take him through the sewers Oshtoru’s wound’s gonna get infected

- oh god who thought it was a good idea to give Rulu a blade.

- Cocopo best bird. Period. MVP.

- Soyankekuru, what a guy.

Ep 24:

- ooh mech fight in the city? oh nvm its just a sword fight. a sword fight between two beasts. thank god vurai ain’t that dumb

- wait they said there was a barrier in the palace, but i don’t think there was a barrier for the outer walls? why the frick didn’t the twins just teleport out for the last bit? they were pretty close to the gates... unless they needed the gates open anyways?

- vurai? not dumb? scratch that, good god do y’all not care about the safety of the people? guess not cuz it’s MECH FIGHT TIME (ok, if we’re honest oshtoru’s the one who initiated so yes he’s equally dumb)

- water vs fire, groudon vs kyogre, this is what animation is all about YASSS

- the twins’ shield is too OP

- haku please stop indulging Nekone

- will the twins actually be able to seal Vurai? they were kind of trash at doing their job in the VN (though they did have the good excuse of being exhausted for this particular instance)

- ok that nekone running sequence is jank

- damn haku blocked that punch? oh no he’s on fire

- looking like nekone’s “it was my fault” is gonna be part of a cascade of setbacks rather than the final blow. I’m kinda glad - the VN’s take was probably the most exasperating part of the whole story - gutwrenching but also made me want to punch her. I’m up for arguing whether or not taking that away was a good thing

- oh no the salt. no. how could you put it at the post-credits scene.

- vurai’s confirmed dead? that could be a problem next season.

Ep 25:

- dang what an opener giving us no info just kuon looking sad. we had emo haku now get ready for emo kuon i guess

- nuedori is probably my favorite song after kimi ga tame, such a good song to overlay the time skip over

- man anime viewers must be so confused. like they saw Haku and Oshtoru get out of town but only Oshtoru show up. man this is so effed up.

- no not the fan noooo augh  brokoro in the kokoro

- sad nekone really sells it doesn’t it

- dang I knew Ennakamuy was surrounded by mountains but I guess the anime went and interpreted that as a CRATER

- at least kuon didn’t leave until later in the night?

-i know the twins did a spell in the VN as well but seeing the visual change between haku and oshtoru is a bit silly

- what’s with the flower field that’s so cheesy

- i can see why someone said laughed rather than cried during this particular use of kimi ga tame - the alternating shots to his saltification is just silly, there’s so many prettier shots for showing people dissolving - like the VN gave you a very serviceable “standing on a cliff as the sun rises and you fade into dust” why didn’t you take it

- side note in the VN i was imagining it something like this scene from CCS but different lighting (sorry I could only find the english dub on short notice, timestamp at 1:13:24):

- also how could you get everyone off model during such an important part

- you know what I’m just gonna pretend that there was some really bad production crunch so they had to do a rush job smh

- i do like this orchestration tho

- oh god the cheese never ends, now it’s raining

- that said it’s not terrible, but definitely missing something compared to the VN

- haha with some of your decisions next season you might just end up in Denebokshir Haku. jk we all know how it ends

- boro boro ;-; yes go hug your kid she needs all the comfort she can get

[xbarrjallenx]

Jealous

Pairing: Mike Wheeler x Reader

Request: “Omfg can i request a part 3 for "Chaising Pavements"?!?! Ahh part 2 was so amazing, im so sad and my heart broke into a million pieces! 😊😊❤ “

“please please please do a part 3 for chasing pavements/jessies girl!!! its so good oh my gosh”

“PART THREE FOR JESSIES GIRL PLZ OR SMTH LIKE THAT IT WAS SO GR8″

“OH MYGOD PLEASE PLEASE DO A PART THREE FOR CHASIG PAVEMENTS/JESSIE’S GIRL! I CANT STAND THE SUSPENSION! OMGGG IT WAS SO GOOD”

“3rd part please.... pleeeeeeease?????”

Summary: (Y/N) and Dustin sought for Nancy’s help to understand Mike’s actions, but he got worse and some important things slipped through his mouth.

Word count: 1.779

Posted: 25th of November 2017

A/N: OMG! Here’s the 3rd part of Charing Pavements and Jessie’s Girl, finally! I thank each one of you for the kind comments, I can’t believe that I got too many positive comments and you seriously made my day, motivating me even more on writing. Thank you so much.

I thought of ending it with part 3, but some of you requested some more Dustin Henderson x reader scenes and I had to make Mike jealous. I just love imagining him dying of jealousy. Anyway, if you want, I voluntarily will write part 4, probably the last part, so let me know. Thank you.

I hope you like it and enjoy! Comments are appreciated and welcomed.

- G. x

Links: Chasing Pavements (Part 1); Jessie’s Girl (Part 2); Can’t Fight This Feeling (Part 4)

Few days has passed since the Snow Ball, but you still couldn’t take Mike’s death and sorrowful glare off your head. You couldn’t understand why he would be grumpy and irked. He couldn’t be jealous, could he? And if ever, why would he? Mostly, when Eleven has already came back.

“Dustin, are you sure of this?” You asked him for the millionth time and you thanked him for being patient with you. You were so anxious and afraid of what might happen next, mostly when Mike could discover everything what you and Dustin were doing.

The group has planned to do another endless campaign of Dungeons and Dragons, but Will and Dustin decided not to as Eleven and Max kept on interrupting the game by asking explanations for every move that the party would make. Everyone in the group, except you and Dustin, offered a hand to teach the mechanics of the game to the girls. You, obviously, had a better thing to do with Dustin.

“Of course, (Y/N).” He nodded nonchalantly, lowering his voice so the boys wouldn’t hear your conversation. After all, they were still convinced that you were already in a relationship with Dustin. “Nancy knows how to make people feel better, maybe she knows why Mike is acting weird too.” You both stopped in front of Nancy’s bedroom door, slowly building your courage up before knocking.

“Dustin, Mike barely talked to us, you must be kidding if you think that he talked to his sister.” You rolled your eyes as Dustin took a deep breath.

You were both devastated as your best friend suddenly stopped talking to you, also because you didn’t do something bad to hurt him or make him angry. He has greeted you, but he was so cold and detached. Mike has never treated you in that way, he never did. He has always wanted to make you feel better, to see you with your widest smile on your face.

“You’re prettier when you smile, (Y/N).” He stated as he tucked your (Y/H/C) hair behind your ear. You flutter closed your eyes in happiness, feeling his lips on your forehead.

“Nancy?” Dustin knocked, gently shouting Nancy’s name to have her attention. Your eyes grew wide as you shook your thoughts off your head and you were about to run away, but Dustin grabbed your hand and squeezed it tightly. “You are hurting, (Y/N), but let me help you. You can still conquer the boy of your dreams, okay?” He whispered in your ear, softening your gaze.

“Hey Dusty, (Y/N)!” She cheerfully greeted, pulling you both in a tight hug. Dustin quickly let go of your hand as he didn’t want for Nancy to tease him with you. That boy has got a crush on the young lady standing in front of you. “What’s up?”

“Uhh,” You nervously blurted out and Dustin smiled at you to encourage you. “I need some help.”

“Oh,” She warmly smiled. “advices on dating Dusty?” She winked at Dustin, but he just rolled his eyes. You shook your head and she quickly knitted her eyebrows together. “But the rumours had it and I thought that you are together.”

“We’ll explain it to you.” Dustin seriously stated. Nancy nodded and she invited you to enter her room, shutting and locking the door nonchalantly.

“So, what is everything about?” Nancy curiously asked, sitting on her study desk. Dustin invited you to sit beside him on the edge of Nancy’s double bed. You followed him as you roamed your eyes around the room, catching some interesting photographs and posters on the wall.

“We aren’t together.” Dustin explained, emphasizing his words. “The people thought that we are, because we hugged in the middle of the gym during the ball.”

“Oh,” Nancy sang as she got Dustin’s point. “so, what is your problem? How can I help you with it?”

“The problem is Mike Wheeler, your asshole brother.” Dustin blurted out. He rolled his eyes at the thought of his best friend. He was a little bitter, because he suddenly stopped talking to him, giving him death glares as he tried to make you, his closest best friend, feel better. He did nothing bad nor awful, on the contrary!

“What did Mike do?” Nancy asked as she let her legs hang from the desk, swaying them as she listened to you.

“I love him.” You shyly blurted out, feeling the heat on your cheeks. Dustin widely smiled, showing his beloved pearls, and teased you cheekily. You shook your head in disbelief and you rolled your eyes, because you couldn’t stand the embarrassment of the situation.

“Oh my God,” Nancy enthusiastically cheered, making you bounce on the bed in shock. You corrugated your forehead as you couldn’t understand if it was a compliment or not, so you sat there: puzzled. “Jonathan owes me and Steve twenty bucks.”

“What? You’re betting on me?” Your mouth opened agape and you elbowed your best friend as he kept on giggling under his breath.

“I’m sorry, but we can’t help but do it. I can totally see in your eyes that you liked Mike.” She nodded, defending the fact that the teen adults made some bet on you and Mike. You shrugged your shoulders as Eleven came into your mind, sighing as the pain penetrated your already shattered heart.

“He likes Eleven.” Dustin murmured, almost silently. Nancy’s smile suddenly fell back as she heard his brother’s secret. “But the thing that I don’t understand is why did he just stop on talking to me or (Y/N). I did nothing but dance with her during the ball.”

“Hmm,” She brought the back of her hand under her chin to think and she sighed since she couldn’t think of the right answer. “have you talked to him?”

“No, he is detached and it seemed like he kept on pushing me away.” You honestly answered. You bit your lower lip, trying to halt your tears from glossing your eyes. “And, if ever, I don’t know what to tell him.”

“Oh,” She nodded, leaving the desk and stood in front of you instead. “I think that the guy is jealous. I know that you are his closest best friend, sometimes he would share to the family your moments together, sometimes your problems too. He would always be proud of himself whenever he would make you feel good. Maybe he’s just jealous and afraid that he might lose you.”

“I don’t know, Nancy.” You were perplexed and you gave her a confused look. “Sometimes, I just want to tell him that I love him, even though I know that it isn’t requited. Maybe I would feel better if I let everything out.” You vented, Dustin was just listening at your statements. Sometimes he would look at you, sometimes he would look at Nancy to understand the situation.

“You’d like to let everything out?” Nancy sadly smiled, thinking of a way how to help you. You stare at her while waiting for her answer, you watched her walk back and forth, trying her best to think of something. “Aha, I got it!” She happily exclaimed.

“What is it?” You raised an eyebrow as you carefully listened to Nancy.

“You pretend that Dustin is Mike and you tell him everything, as in everything.” She convincingly said in a lower tone. You glanced at Dustin and he smiled at you in response. “You’re going to practice and, whenever you’re ready, you talk to Mike. Is that okay?”

“Okay.” You shortly answered. You unleashed a long and heavy sigh, readying yourself. It wasn’t the same to have Dustin in front of you, of course, but maybe he could help you to make things easier.

“Whenever you’re ready.” Nancy encouraged you as if she was a director of some sort of film.

“Dustin,” You started, turning towards Dustin’s direction. You imagined having Mike in front of you, even though you pronounced Dustin’s name. You thought that calling Dustin by his best friend’s name was disrespectful. “I-I like you, no! I-I love you! It has been years since I started loving you, but I never had the courage to confess my feelings for you. I don’t know, maybe because I thought that we were just best friends or something like that and best friends don’t usually love each other, I mean in a romantic way.” Dustin nodded to encourage you to go on with your speech. He didn’t know that you stopped because you heard some footsteps outside the room.

“Just go on!” Dustin gently ordered with a smile. He was really willing to help you, also because he didn’t want to see you hurting anymore.

You nodded and took a long breath. “I didn’t even know what love was, but then El has arrived and my-“

You suddenly stopped when you heard a loud bang outside of Nancy’s room, jumping a little bit on the bed. Your eyes grew wide, afraid that someone has heard your confession.

“What the hell, Mike?” Nancy twisted her door knob, went out of the room and forcefully opened Mike’s room. You and Dustin looked at each other and followed Nancy, slowly walking, almost tip-toeing. “What’s your problem?”

You peaked through his doorway and your heart dropped as you saw his tears slowly streaming down his face. Dustin looked at you and you looked at Dustin, you were both puzzled, confused.

“Fuck off, Nancy!” He pushed her sister away, wiping his tears furiously.

“Mike!” You restrained him from pushing people away and treating them in a rude way. He wasn’t the Mike that you used to know and you kept on saying that you knew him well, but you didn’t even know why he was acting up in that way.

“(Y/N), just go away, okay? You do nothing but give me heartbreak and misery!” He fearlessly spat the words as if they were venom in his mouth. Your tears found their way through your eyes and your chest tightened, his words weighing in your chest. Dustin quickly hugged you, rubbing your back as you sobbed against his neck, knowing how hurt you were.

“What the hell, Mike?” Dustin defended you as he yelled at his friend. “Stop being a dick!”

Mike noisily sobbed and hardly sniffed, letting his hot tears to wet his red cheeks. “You know what, (Y/N)? It’s hard for me to say this, but,” He paused, terribly trembling as he took all of his courage out. He didn’t mind Dustin, but the scene of Dustin hugging you broke his heart even more, wishing that it was him. “I love you and I’m jealous of the way you’re happy without me!”

[pollyestergivens]

Part 2: Nancy Drew & The Case of the Missing Realism

Balancing Immersion with Puzzles

A wall of text series on how Nancy Drew games largely lost their charm.

A question every game developer must answer is, “How aware should the player be that they are playing a game?”

Games that focus on scoring points, gaining achievements, new & innovative game mechanics, etc. don’t always try to immerse the player in the way story-based games often do--indeed, some narrative based games these days are called “walking simulators” because of the almost complete lack of game mechanics.

What has always been special about the Nancy Drew series is the balance the games often achieve between game play mechanics and storytelling. Interviewing suspects, exploring locations, solving puzzles and collecting clues give the player an active role in unraveling the mystery.

In the early games, largely due to budget and hardware limitations, characters and locations were not exactly photo-realistic, but once they moved onto full-3D characters in the second title, I never felt it was significantly distracting or lessened my ability to get into the game (with the one glaring exception being their almost obsessive desire to slap the HER logo or Nancy’s name on every day objects in the game world, particularly in the earliest titles). 

However, the irony is that as HER improved their ability to produce realistic graphics with each title (and moved on to slapping Krolmeister on everything), the content of the games seemed to be increasingly unrealistic, causing the very thing they should have avoided at all costs: breaking immersion.

Mini-Games

Mini-games showed up early in the series, but they were exceedingly rare in the first ten or so titles. Instead, the games were full of largely realistic, detective-style tasks such as dusting for fingerprints, code-breaking, finding and using passwords and locker combinations, etc., alongside important suspect dialogues and general snooping, which made for a pretty balanced-feeling game. Jump ahead to the last ten or so titles, and you’ll find a completely different scenario. 

Take the last (and hopefully not final) game, Sea of Darkness. SEA is very nearly nothing but a barrage of mini-games. Whether you’re helping out at the pub “filling orders” or earning money by matching vocabulary words (though very fun for nerds like me), you’re painfully aware that you are playing a game. Many of the various contraptions on the ship (the wheel puzzle) and in the lighthouse (the 2048 clone) also scream “VIDEO GAME.”

Rather than methodically solving a mystery, Nancy is essentially going from mini-game to mini-game, with finding a clue or talking to someone as window dressing. It gives the player the feeling that the point of the game is not so much to feel like a detective or to care about the story, but rather to get a minor dopamine rush from finishing all the puzzles--much like the point of most hidden object games, which rarely take the time to produce a decent story since that’s not what the player is typically there for.

However, I would venture to say that Nancy Drew game players are there for the story and certainly there for the feeling of being a detective. By constantly being made to play mini-games like Aggregation, 2048, nonograms, sudokus, renograms, etc. ad nauseam, I find myself feeling less like a detective and more like I’ve just played a series of unrelated iOS games.

That isn’t to say that these mini-games aren’t fun--I found Aggregation and the wires puzzle from Trail of the Twister to be quite addicting. Nor do I think there were no great story lines in the later games (Shadow at the Water’s Edge and Ghost of Thornton Hall both shined bright in this area). 

Rather, they simply break immersion, which gives the game a distinctly different feel from others that focus more on things like snooping through someone’s computer or sending Morse code messages to smugglers.

Sure, you’re usually doing the mini-game while being sleuthy--getting into Gray’s computer in The Deadly Device or getting into the safe in Shadow at the Water’s Edge--but it takes away the realism factor to, in my opinion, an unacceptable degree.

When mini-games are used sparingly, as they once were in the earlier titles, they can bring a fun-factor that only a video game could bring, adding a little variety to the typical adventure game puzzles like “find the key for the lock.”

Implausible Contraptions 

However, mini-games are not the only culprit in The Case of the Missing Realism. Many of the games suffer from implausible contraptions made by dead people--sometimes for no apparent reason.

Again, look to Sea of Darkness for some egregious examples. Part of a skeleton holding a box within a secret area of an old ship that has been thoroughly restored yet somehow was not found??? The ship’s wheel has a fucking slider-type puzzle on it???

Was the captain an amazing engineer? No. 

Did he hire an amazing engineer? No.

Similar issues abound with Tomb of the Lost Queen. Personally, I found this game and its numerous puzzles (some mini-games, some not) to be fun, but it didn’t feel like a “true” Nancy Drew mystery. The ancient Egyptians obviously were great engineers, but moving columns??? Really??? I found there was an almost mystical feel to the game, which runs quite contrary to the game worlds of previous games.

However, the absolute worst offender is Labyrinth of Lies. While the game designers no doubt had the time of their lives creating all those beautiful set locations, the stage system and all the sundry puzzles it contained made about as much sense as the entirety of The Shattered Medallion: absolutely none.

That coupled with suspects literally spelling out how to solve their own puzzles or find where they hid something made LIE a thoroughly unimmersive game. 

We’re asked as players to suspend our disbelief in these sort of situations for the sake of an entertaining game, but again I ask: is simply being entertained really, at core, what Nancy Drew gamers want? 

I say no.

I think what drew us in and what we kept hoping to find again as each additional title was released was the feeling of really being a detective. But the more we’re reminded that this is just a game and realism is sacrificed in favor of shoving in as many puzzles as possible, the less we get that feeling.

Perhaps making all the contraptions realistic can pose a creative struggle for the game designers, but past games have proven that an abundance of interesting and challenging puzzles can be included without sacrificing a feeling of awe or simply being interesting.

A few good examples:

Benjamin Hawkins’ hideout in Danger on Deception Island 

The monolith in Secret of the Scarlet Hand

Almost all the secret areas in Treasure in the Royal Tower

The elevator shaft puzzle is a particularly clever example

The reveal of each of these places felt exciting and made me feel like secret rooms and hidden chambers can be real--like each of these places could actually exist in the real world. Part of what made them feel real was also that the mechanism which revealed them to us was not outlandish. Stone and jade artifacts were used to open the monolith, not a sudoku puzzle followed by the monolith rocketing off into space or some such feat of implausible engineering (though I won’t defend the bizarre, poetic speech given by the cast when Nancy escapes). 

None of this is to say that every bit of the old games was 100% realistic--a little bit of suspension of disbelief is okay. But there is a balance that should be maintained, and sadly it became more and more unbalanced with later releases.

Character Personalities

There is no doubt that the Nancy Drew series contains some amazing and memorable characters. From the older games, we got Professor Hotchkiss, Brady & Simone, the wrong amnesiac, Red Knott, and Ethel, to name a few. And the newer games gave us Big Island Mike, Henry Bolet, Colin Baxter, Yumi & Rentaro, Deirdre, Jamila, and Harper Thornton, among others. 

Aside from some “hip” dialogue that missed the mark in Warnings at Waverly Academy and questionable accents in several games, characters generally felt genuine and unique--only occasionally would they say something odd or out of character. But a trend started to appear towards the end: so many of the characters began to sound the same--they were almost all suddenly witty.

Aside from the ever evolving personalities of George, Bess and the Hardy Boys, Yumi and Rentaro were the first exceptionally witty characters I noticed, and at the time it felt quite novel and like a genuine portrayal of funny, young people. But then came Lukas, Marcus, and Karl in The Captive Curse. Then Ryan in The Deadly Device. Then Bridget in the The Silent Spy. Then the entire cast of The Shattered Medallion. Then Niobe in Labyrinth of Lies. Not to mention all the random, out-of-character injections of wit coming from countless others in almost all the last ten games.

I remember loling at some of the quotes from Rentaro and Miwako, and I think their wit and humor lightened up an otherwise dark and grim story line--similar to Harper’s role in Ghost of Thornton Hall. But increasingly in the newest ten titles, it seemed like the humor often fell flat or simply didn’t fit with the character. It started to feel like you weren’t talking to suspects in a mystery, but rather characters all written by the same author.

Sadly, not everyone is a master of wit in the real world, and the overuse of these type of characters can feel jarring. Again: immersion broken.

The Big, Glaring Exception

HER always ends the game with a final culprit-stopping puzzle. They usually involve quick thinking, recalling previous game knowledge and/or high-stakes puzzle solving--and they usually range from implausible to impossible. Sometimes dreadfully combining implausible contraptions with a mini-game, these doozies have been rearing their ugly heads since that alarm sequence at the end of Stay Tuned for Danger. 

The famous “fight” in Danger by Design and the Poe-inspired showdown in Warnings at Waverly Academy raised more than a few eyebrows--even on the HER official message boards, where criticism of any game is often tantamount to sin. But they’re far from alone in their bewilderment. From magical platforms in Tomb of the Lost Queen and The Creature of Kapu Cave to a well-trained whale in Danger on Deception Island and the mini-game-to-end-all-mini-games in Labyrinth of Lies, the ending has never quite been the peak of any Nancy Drew game.

Why It Matters

Some evolution of the Nancy Drew game series was perhaps inevitable, given the sheer volume of titles released. In an effort to keep interest up and stay relevant, HER took risks by adding mechanics and trying out new writers and designers over the years. The trouble is, the feel of the games evolved too. 

Rather than finding ways to maintain that sense of mystery and realism (and perhaps improve their endgames), they began to drift towards a much more “gamey” feel. Collectible phone charms began to be placed in game scenes (why are there cellphone charms in an ancient Egyptian tomb??? The real mystery of that game). Powering on a lighthouse went from logically deducing the correct light bulb to a round of 2048. 

Was it wrong of HER to move in this direction? Of course not. It’s all down to matter of opinion whether these changes made the game more or less fun, and I freely admit that I thoroughly enjoyed many of the newest titles. 

But did they feel like “true” Nancy Drew games? Not really.

With Pointless Tasks, mini-games, and unrealistic characters and scenarios around every corner, immersion was constantly being shattered, and I increasingly walked away dissatisfied with the newest installments.

But another culprit shares the blame as well--the topic of Part 3: Nancy Drew & The Vanishing Set Designer.

Read Part 1: Nancy Drew & The Curse of the Pointless Task

[singingwordwright]

Shadowhunters recap - s2ep18 “Awake, Arise, or Be Forever Fallen”

SHADOWHUNTERS Recaps Intro and Masterlist

These recaps may contain spoilers from the books (that may or may not happen in the show.) Proceed at your own risk.

Recap and meta under the cut.

Gotta give it to Max, he’s a little badass. Temper that with a bit of discretion and maybe he’ll actually live to reach adulthood, contrary to all book canon. Like, seriously Max, you couldn’t have gone to find Alec or Izzy once you realized what the hair leading you to Sebastian meant, instead of confronting Sebastian yourself?

Gratifying just how many times Sebastian gets stabbed in this episode. Of course, I’d prefer it if one of them was a mortal wound, but alas…

If Lindsay was lurking in the hall outside Alec’s office, she should have heard Max’s head crack against the desk. A blow hard enough to knock someone out and cause them to bleed from their nose and ears would be LOUD. I’ve literally heard real people hit their heads in ways that do much less damage and it sounded like a melon exploding.

Now that the banter and fun goofing around is back, so is Simon and Maia’s chemistry. I think this is the magic of Simon. I bought the Climon relationship the most when he and Clary were being giggly and having fun together. I found Simon and Maia’s chemistry in s2ep06 to be off the charts, again, when they were bantering and laughing. For some reason, whenever Simon forgets to be that guy whom women can laugh and have fun with, he loses a lot of what makes him click in his various potential pairings.

My frustration hit its peak with the fact that Sebastian was right there in the middle of everything while everyone was all, “Where is Jonathan?” There’s only so many times you can yell “HE’S THERE!!! HE’S RIGHT FUCKING THERE IN FRONT OF YOU!!!” at the TV before you just throw your hands up in the air and say, “You know what? Fuck it. You’re too stupid to live. I hope he guts you all.”

They carried this plotline right up to the brink of me hitting that point.

Current sexuality: Magnus saying, “m’lady.”

“Your crush” Oh, I’ll show you a fucking crush, you pint-sized wretch!

Let’s all take a moment to bow our heads and be grateful the producers are making a young-adult urban fantasy show and not a hospital drama. Because they would be really, really bad at it. Seriously I was cringing.

And what the fuck were the runes flashing on the monitor over Max’s head about? Are they there to remind the infirmary medics “This is how you draw an iratze. This is how you draw Nourishment. This is how…” (I’m not sure what that last one was, but it looked like some Shadowhunter stylized version of the Caduceus or the rod of Asclepius.)

Of all the times for Magnus to refuse to take Alec’s call.

Wow. I’d forgotten what an asshole Season 1 Alec could be. He’s come a long way, considering that in-universe it has literally been six weeks since he and Magnus met (No, seriously, check out my timeline if you doubt me. I did the math so you don’t have to.)

I say “asshole” in the most loving way possible, of course. He had his reasons, but he was indeed an asshole. It just goes to show how unhappy and uncomfortable in his own skin he was, and how much losing that burden of hiding himself away from the world impacted him.

Still, I sort of wanted Magnus to push back a little harder when Alec low-key threatened him. “If you let anyone know…”/“Oh, you’ll do what, Shadowhunter?” Because Magnus could almost certainly kick Alec’s ass with all but one of his little pinky fingers broken.

I’m glad we’re finally getting down to business with the whole Ollie thing. But IIRC it’s against the Accords (or Covenant?) to let mundanes know anything about the Shadow world. Which means Luke could be in trouble if the Clave gets wind of her finding out.

And why is so so eager to know, anyway? Like, why was she all up in his business?

I’m wondering if it doesn’t actually have something to do with Maia, considering the way Ollie zeroed right in on her. Say, Ollie’s a cop, but she also, idk, moonlights helping Sam (who maybe is a private investigator?) by taking on missing person cases at the behest of desperate families. Contrary to book canon, we’ve been given some indication that Maia’s parents may actually care for her, so what if they hired Sam and Ollie to track Maia down, and find out she’s gotten mixed up in what might look to be (on the surface) a weird wolf-worshipping cult?

IDK I’m just spinning bullshit theories.

I like how at SDCC Isaiah said that Luke is grooming Maia to take over the pack someday, and how we actually sort of saw that in action here.

I liked Jace’s distress here, because with the exception of s2ep08 and a pat on the head in the last episode, we haven’t really seen him and Max interact or gotten any impression of how his relationship is with Max. And his distress here feels a lot more…sincere? relatable, maybe?...than his oft-repeated bouts of brooding manpain over his upbringing under Valentine.

And, strangely, his pain feeling more genuine also made Clary’s empathy and support feel more genuine. This moment made me feel more of a connection between them than just about any other moment they’ve had on-screen together.

Funny how when you build a relationship between characters out of moments and situations that are arise organically within the plot—rather than forcing it—it just works better, isn’t it?

I feel like I should say something about Bat, but I just don’t have much of an impression of him or what part he’s going to play within the plot, yet. Kevin Alves seems incredibly sweet and eager to be a part of the show, however, so there’s that?

“Rebooting of the brain.” Really? (The part of me that actually knows something about medicine is rolling its eyes so hard right now. This was badly done. Suspension of disbelief in one area only works if you are meticulously grounded in accurate reality in other areas, and this would have been a good area to do that. Massive head trauma that can’t be magically woo-wooed away.)

I have lots of thoughts on the decision to keep Max alive, most of them not good. I was prepared for the pain of him dying, which would have struck pretty close to home because I have a 10yo son. And as a storyteller, I think it would have gone a long way to establishing the stakes for this story.

Like, Valentine wants to commit genocide, and Sebastian wants to help him. We all get that. And we’re all horrified by it. But genocide is a MASSIVE concept to try to really wrap your head around. The human brain, I think, tends to shield you from really grasping it. It’s just too much.

This is a problem faced often by storytellers who are writing stories in which the fate of the world is at stake. It’s too big. The audience can’t connect with it personally, can’t internalize it. So you take that, and you distill it to make the stakes personal. One death, of a character who is beloved by your protagonists and hopefully by your audience, an innocent with all the potential in the world that will now never manifest, stands in for the thousands or millions who will actually die if the bad guy isn’t stopped. That death becomes a rallying point for your protagonists, and a symbol to your audience of just how evil your bad guy is and how much he needs to be stopped.

In short, Max needed to die. He needed to die as tragically as possible. It would have had a lot more storytelling mileage.

God. This scene was just everything I could have asked for their first time to be. I’m pretty sure I wrote a line in a fanfic once about Magnus telling Alec that one of the rules of his bed was that you had to be able to laugh in it, so the giggling and giddiness was just so perfect. And the fact that Magnus responded “No such thing” when Alec expressed concern that he might be doing something wrong is really something else I could have written myself.

It was tender and sweet and sexy without being objectifying and I loved it.

I will say, though, I’m probably in the minority in that I never wanted or needed to see a scene where Alec was confronted with Magnus’s cat eyes for the first time and explicitly stated his unstinting acceptance of him. I always felt it would be othering to go that route. And I felt like this idea that Magnus, who is so incredibly powerful, would lose control so easily a little absurd. I always liked to imagine that the idea that Alec would find NOT being accepting of Magnus unthinkable, that he would be honestly and sincerely befuddled by the idea that Magnus’s eyes might be a Big Deal. “Yeah, he’s a warlock, he has a warlock mark, I’m not sure why that’s supposed to be something that matters.”

That said, if they were going to go there, then this was the way to do it. The thread that weaves through Magnus and Alec’s story in this episode and ties past to present is the fact that they come from different worlds, and with those different worlds come different obligations and priorities. So in this case, the othering was entirely the point and it played into that theme.

So, if it had to happen, I’m glad it at least happened within this context and wasn’t just schmaltzy.

I really loved Luke being such a badass here but I’m certain allowing Russell to live is a bad idea.

Seriously, though, Russell. Not only is Luke a badass just as a werewolf, but he’s got the martial training of a Shadowhunter. How do you imagine you’re going to win this?

Probably one of the most realistic fight scenes I’ve ever seen in terms of showing just how exhausting fighting becomes in very short order. Too many drag out too long before the combatants start to show fatigue.

I really want to know about the cooks at the Jade Wolf. Are they werewolves themselves? Is that why the kitchen staff never bats an eye at anything, including these people waltzing in and out of the kitchen and storeroom?

The scene with Maia explaining her backstory was extremely well done and Alisha Wainwright is all things wonderful and I love her.

“This is what love got me.” Let’s take a moment to recognize the symmetry of Maia and Simon’s stories though. Becoming a vampire, a Downworlder, is what love got Simon as well.

I can’t say anything about this scene that hasn’t been said before, and better, since they released it as a sneak peek. But it’s so beautiful and my heart hurts.

Magnus’s moment with the Lightwoods all together on one side of the hall and him by himself on the other is incredibly poignant but I can’t find the words to really examine it properly. This is the point at which things just began to hurt too much and my brain stopped being able to cope with it.

I’d really like to know how Jace, who can sense Alec’s happiness over things like having sex with his boyfriend for the first time, couldn’t sense the lack of a spike in grief that would have surely occurred upon Max’s death. Grrr.

The fight sequence with Sebastian taking out all the guards was amazing and Will Tudor is brilliant. Did he really use a sword that was still stuck through someone’s body to parry a blow?

What the hell was with him just using his hand to open the crypt, though? No rune or anything. Can Sebastian somehow channel magic?

This whole thing with Clary was awesome and for once she seemed to be working for her miracles so I’ll ungrudgingly let her have this. The one thing I don’t know is what finally tipped her off about Sebastian. Was the electrum nugget thing too warm after he handled it? Did she just realize she never saw his palm? What made her chase after him and check his palm?

I loved her stabbing him. Twice. I’m fully in support of stabbing Sebastian. Yes. Please. Let’s stab Sebastian more. Sebastian for Pincushion 2k17.

Sebastian continues to be a creepy-ass fuck. Seriously, WHY did they decide to go with the incestuous obsession thing? There are so many other places they could have taken that story.

I like that her Open rune that burned through Magnus’s wards also exploded the Institute security doors. I appreciated that for a couple reasons. First, because Sebastian taught her to do that, to use her runes and make them more powerful. Second, it’s also a nice little nod to the books, since we didn’t get that scene of Clary totally disintegrating and blowing up Valentine’s barge with that rune.

Sebastian has vamp speed, too?

I want to ship them, but I haven’t managed it yet. In-universe it’s been like, a week, since Clary and Simon broke up. And of course we know they’re not end-game. But the writers ended up making me buy Climon more than I ever expected to, so maybe they’ll do the same with this one.

I just don’t want to see either of them hurt, so if Simon ends up ending it with Maia, I’m going to be upset, and if Maia ends up ending it with Simon I’ll be upset. *sigh*

I hated seeing the home Simon has been making for himself torn apart like that.

This is the moment of my first death and the beginning of buckets of tears. This look on Magnus’s face after Alec says “our way back to each other.” I can’t. I just can’t. He’s just so heartbroken here.

And the way Alec’s eyes close when Magnus touches him.

And the way Magnus’s voice almost breaks when he says “I love you, too.”

And the way Magnus is trying to smile, just a little. To hold on to some of the joy he’s found with Alec. To file this portion of his life away as a happy memory. To remember Alec as a good thing and not a source of sorrow.

There are so many nuances here and every single one of them fucking slays me dead.

Alec’s disbelief and denial.

Alec’s youthful, naïve insistence that if they just work hard enough, if they’re just determined enough, they can find a way, and Magnus’s world-weary wisdom and centuries of experience telling him there’s just no chance for them.

“You once asked me what I was afraid of. It’s this.”

And here’s my second death. That all along we thought that Magnus was afraid of being alone, being abandoned, like Camille said, he never does well losing the people he cares about.

So, we’ve always thought he was afraid Alec would break his heart. Leave him. Be repulsed by him. Choose duty over him.

We should have known better. Magnus has lived long enough to have his heart broken before, and he knows he’ll survive it.

His real fear is inflicting that pain, that loss, on someone else.

My third and finale death. Alec stifling a sob is where I just lose it entirely.

So I guess what I’m saying here?

Yes, this is a break-up. That’s my read on it. Sorry. It just is.

I don’t believe it’s a permanent one. Of course it’s not. If they’re not back together by the end of the season, at least on some sort of tentative, provisional basis, I’ll be very surprised and extremely pissed off. If I’m left with this boulder sitting on my chest over the hiatus I’m not sure I’ll survive. This show is supposed to be my happy place and I think if they leave me in this hurty place for very long it’s going to ruin it for me.

I don’t think the producers will let this linger long.

But this scene right here? As far as Magnus is concerned in this exact moment as he’s walking away from Alec?

He thinks they’re done. He thinks they’re over. He means it to be that way.

Something will happen to make him change his mind, though, and that’s important. Because here’s the thing:

We’ve seen Alec choose Magnus over and over and over.

He chose Magnus in s1ep06 when he walked away from the Institute and duty to take an evening to at least investigate the possibility of doing something that wasn’t about duty.

He chose Magnus in s1ep12 when he walked away from his own wedding.

He chose Magnus in s2ep06 when he turned his back on his own fears and misgivings and plunged into this relationship.

He chose Magnus in s2ep08 when he challenged his mother’s lack of acceptance repeatedly and sent her a very pointed message about their relationship.

He chose Magnus in s2ep10 when he rejected Aldertree’s words about the impossibility of relationships between Shadowhunters and Downworlders.

He chose Magnus in s2ep13 when he risked censure from the Inquisitor to take a stand for what’s right.

Even when everything he’s ever been trained and brought up to do is telling him to do the opposite, he has chosen Magnus repeatedly.

The only time we haven’t seen him choose Magnus was with regard to keeping the secret about the Soul Sword, and even then, his choice was about Magnus, even if it was paternalistic and wrong-headed.

What we haven’t seen, though?

We haven’t seen Magnus choosing Alec. We see him clearly aware of the difficulty in their situation, especially since s2ep12, but he never really chooses to stand against it. Which is not to say he’s not committed, not at all. We’ve seen Magnus put himself on the line and expose himself and make himself vulnerable for Alec. That’s huge. But with the exception of his hesitation to keep pursuing Alec in s1ep12, we haven’t seen him make that same deliberate decision to damn the obstacles between them and make this relationship happen. His commitment has been more along the lines of ducking and covering and hoping whatever is heading toward them blows over before it pushes them to this critical juncture.

We need to see him make that choice. Everything since s2ep12 has been leading to him making that choice.

Now, I don’t want to step outside my lane, so I’m gonna tread carefully here. 

The thing we have to remember is that Alec, coming from the privileged group, is much safer choosing Magnus than Magnus is in choosing Alec. He’s got that safety net built in, so it’s easier for him. He may face censure and perhaps a decrease in some of his advantages (like being passed over for job promotions) but no consequences that he might face are on the same level of what Magnus might face.

So the two dilemmas and the choice to stand against their respective obstacles are not equal. If Magnus choses their relationship over his people, he doesn’t just face censure, he faces genocide. Pretty big difference there. The only possible way he can justifiably choose Alec at all is if he somehow discovers that choosing Alec dovetails conveniently with the best way to protect himself and his people.

My prediction is that something in the next episode, or in the finale at the latest, is going to bring Magnus to that decision point and make him turn around.

But for the moment? Right now, this scene?

I know it’s going to be an unpopular opinion, but Magnus really does mean this to be a breakup.

[faithisaverb]

Is the Bible literal? [40 Days of Questions, Day 5]

Day 5. Why does literal interpretation of the Bible help us vs lead us astray?

This is an excellent question that certainly cannot be answered fully in this one post, but I’ll do my best to respond in a full, yet hopefully succinct way.

How literal we must take the Bible is a common point of contention among the church today, with some claiming that unless one believes that every single word of the Bible is meant to be taken as literal truth, you render it all invalid. Thus, you cannot believe in the resurrection of Christ if you do not believe that Jonah was actually swallowed by a fish, etc.

This is a very problematic stance to take for many reasons.

First and foremost, it is unnecessarily exclusive, creating an all or nothing metric.  It presents an almost adversarial attitude toward anyone who might question any part of the Bible, treating the it as a book that must be defended and protected rather than a book that is “alive and active” (as it says in Hebrews 4:12).

Second, it forces us to perform some very difficult mental gymnastics to make certain things in the Bible physically possible (How did Noah get two of EVERY animal into the ark that would hardly be big enough to hold all the animals in the Pittsburgh Zoo?  How did the animals that need cold climate survive with the animals that need a hot climate?  What did he feed them all?).

Third, and perhaps most importantly, the Bible never was meant to be read in this way, and the Bible never once claims that every word in it is meant to be read literally.  Quite the contrary, the Bible is has many stories - such as the parables - that are explicitly meant to be taken figuratively.  It is a library of literature of a myriad of genres - some history, some poetry, some prophecy, some parable, some songs, some surrealism, some symbolism, some laments, some accounting, some aphorisms, some love stories, and many, many others.

How we are to read the truth in these different types of literature vary.  There is a big difference between the truth of the Gospels and the truth of the stories in Genesis.  One is presented as a historical account by those with firsthand knowledge of the events, the other is a completion of oral traditions passed down generation to generation to help us understand the relationship between God and humans.  There is genuine truth in both.  However, one is purporting that that truth is a factual account of real events, whereas the other can be more figurative and still have meaning that is absolute.  

Adam and Even do not have to have been real people for the truth of that story (how we turn away from God and turn to sin) to be realized.  This story can be figurative and the truth of it still be absolute. 

*Bare in mind, I’m not necessarily saying that Adam and Eve, Noah’s Ark, or Jonah & the fish weren’t real.  I’m saying that whether they were real people or not is not the point of those stories.  They don’t have to be real people for those stories to be telling us something true about God (and humans).

Jesus does need to be real.

Jesus had to have lived, had to have died, and had to have been resurrected for ANY of the rest of the Bible to have the meaning it does.  As Paul says in 1st Corinthians 15:14, “if Christ hasn’t been raised, then our preaching is useless and your faith is useless.”

This story must be literal, or the Gospel is just a story of a crazy person who said some nice things but thought himself to be a god, and the crazy people who bought it to the point that they were willing to die for it.  

We can still struggle with accepting the resurrection and have faith.  Knowing what to do with the resurrection is a struggle for many people.  But we should know that the Gospel story was meant to be taken literally.  Genesis, as a whole, was probably not.

A big divide for many is a literal six-day creation, coupled with a reading of the genealogy in Luke’s Gospel that leads some to believe that the Bible to claim that the earth is only about 6,000 years old.

(It doesn’t claim that).

St. Augustine, one of the most influential voices in the church, writing back in the 4th century, encountered this same problem.  Here was his direct response to those who claimed a literal six-day creation story:

Often, a non-Christian knows something about the earth, the heavens, and the other parts of the world, about the motions and orbits of the stars and even their sizes and distances, …and this knowledge he holds with certainty from reason and experience. It is thus offensive and disgraceful for an unbeliever to hear a Christian talk nonsense about such things, claiming that what he is saying is based in Scripture. We should do all we can to avoid such an embarrassing situation, which people see as ignorance in the Christian and laugh to scorn.

The shame is not so much that an ignorant person is laughed at, but rather that people outside the faith believe that we hold such opinions, and thus our teachings are rejected as ignorant and unlearned. If they find a Christian mistaken in a subject that they know well and hear him maintaining his foolish opinions as based on our teachings, how are they going to believe these teachings in matters concerning the resurrection of the dead, the hope of eternal life, and the kingdom of heaven, when they think these teachings are filled with fallacies about facts which they have learnt from experience and reason.

Reckless and presumptuous expounders of Scripture bring about much harm when they are caught in their mischievous false opinions by those not bound by our sacred texts. And even more so when they then try to defend their rash and obviously untrue statements by quoting a shower of words from Scripture and even recite from memory passages which they think will support their case ‘without understanding either what they are saying or what they assert with such assurance.’

Augustine, writing over 1500 years ago, warned against claiming that the Bible is saying things that go in the face of observable science.  To Augustine, science was not a threat to the Bible, but rather the threat was people claiming that the Bible said science was not true.  The amount of suspension of disbelief required to require the observable world bend to the constraints of a literal reading of Genesis 1 seemed toxic to Augustine.  Why would God work in a way that is against what our observations of the world tell us?  Rather, Genesis 1 is telling us that God made the world on purpose, and that God made everything to be good.  God in creation was building out of nebulous chaos toward elegant complexity.  How it was made and how long it took are not the point.

A literal interpretation of the while Bible is reading the Bible in a way that much of it was not meant to be read, and makes it far less accessible.  

Throughout the Bible, God is using nearly every type and style of literature to help us to understand who God is and who we are in relation to God.  The complexity of both God and humans require a complexity of ways to articulate that.  When we start to appreciate the diversity in the ways in which God’s story is written, we can better appreciate the diversity of the community that God calls us into, and the depth and complexity of the relationship that God desires with us.

The Bible is not meant to be constrictive - especially for our minds.

Rather the Bible is meant to inspire us toward wonder and create in us a desire to explore who God is, who we are, and to see the world in brand new ways.   It should awaken our minds, move our hearts, and challenge us.

The Word of God is life giving, 

and should make us alive, 

in all of the complicated ways that we can be.

[mild-lunacy]

My Meta Daydreams (and I)

When I read a fic for a canon I know well, I think it's genius achievement when I can shut my brain off. There's a reason I most enjoy fics where I have little familiarity with canon, if any, and that's because it's the only way I can usually stop yelling 'OOC! OOC!' at the top of my lungs. Sherlock is an exception, in that there was a lot of fic and so much of it was good-- and in-character. And, needless to say, 80%+ was Johnlock. Usually I'm only so interested, and can tolerate the mental dissonance only so long, especially with canon pairings. I think fondly of the fandoms where there's a lot of fic, and the pairing I'm into is far enough from canon reality I'm not constantly trying to gouge my eyes out. Usually it's that *either* there's a lot of good fic *or* the pairing is far enough from canon, and in the right way: the old-school slash OTPs generally hit a sweet spot 'cause the canon is *about* the relationship, but in a platonic sense.

In that regard, both Thor/Loki and John/Sherlock and all the rest of the partner ships, from Jim/Spock to Jim/Blair have a lot in common. Perhaps ironically, Johnlock will probably be remembered as a classic slash pairing that had a renaissance at the transition moment in media. I'm pretty sure Jim and Blair living together platonically on The Sentinel, or Fraser and Ray going off into the sunset together at the end in Due South would be hard to make happen these days without some people calling it queerbaiting; times have changed. Anyway, most people are much more vocally critical of the media we consume, these days (which is great). As in, most people who are not me, haha. The thing I'm knee-jerk critical of is fanfic; I sort of enjoy my entertainment with as much suspension of disbelief and mental bending as possible, particularly since I only watch most things once. The thing is, with stuff I read/watch for fun and enjoy enough to think about on the meta level, I *can* analyze, but I prefer to daydream. I think that's the difference, what explains why I'm still playing with S4 'as is' when everyone I know except Ivy has given up in disgust.

I think my relationship with analysis and whatever motivates my meta writing has demonstrably been shown to be different from the rest of fandom. I read and write analysis for fun, just like everyone else; I like thinking about fiction and I do it naturally, don't get me wrong. I do it if I'm interested at all, on some level. The thing is, I don't... default to critique, exactly, let alone social critique. The thing that comes naturally isn't wondering 'how'-- pretty much ever. I do that if and only if things are *really* confusing and nonlinear enough to require charts, like in TAB. Then I do want to know what's going on and how it works on the surface level. Usually, though, I get that part in broad terms, and that's more than enough. In other words, I'm Moffat's perfect audience, haha.

Some examples: Star Trek TOS wants you-- the audience-- to think about the progressive possibilities in the future of mankind, socially and technologically, in space. When I was a huge Trek fan, I spent all my 'meta daydreaming' about the future and how I can possibly live an extra 250 years and serve on a starship, and what other planets are like, how we should all give up having countries, and pondering Spock's feelings. Star Trek AOS wants you to think about alternate realities, and just how much would have changed if Jim Kirk's father had died, and Jim grew up angry, isolated and with a chip on his shoulder. What kind of man would he be, and how could he still (eventually) become the Kirk we know (or would he?) Likewise, what sort of impact would the destruction of Vulcan have on this timeline? What sort of things would still happen, but with major differences and at a different time and place? That's the sort of thoughts I had, and so I loved both the AOS movies while most classic Trek fans hated them (particularly Into Darkness). Not to put too fine a point on it, Series 4 of Sherlock wants you to think about the sort of influence a 'sociopathic' sister had on a young Sherlock and what the trauma she caused really meant for him. Mofftiss want you to believe in the unshakeable bond John and Sherlock have, which the other series already established, but to wonder about all the ways in which John hasn't been allowing either himself or Sherlock to be flawed. And so on and so forth. That's the sort of daydreams I tend to have, at base.

Perhaps you could say I'm very suggestible, though as I said-- this doesn't work with fanfic, where it *does* seem to work for most people. If I had to guess, I'd say it's that most people read fic that's narrowly tailored to their interests, with at least the pairing and the rating (and usually the main tropes being used) guaranteed. Most people's fic tastes aren't mine, so I don't normally have that experience of things being tailored to me with fic, aside from on the pairing level. Obviously, TV and genre lit is much more broadly focused, and thus much more likely to disappoint even the non-meta-inclined viewer. Most people tend to project their lives or experiences onto fiction enough that they get pretty turned off if they realize the story is suddenly not so relatable. One discordant new element, and it no longer 'gels' properly into the familiar shape. With most people who're into doing meta, I get more of a sense that the interest is in deconstruction-- in taking the narrative apart and seeing what makes it tick. Some people use this to make predictions or theories, some just analyze characterization, but most meta fans need the text to 'make sense' in the rational or practical sense, not the metaphoric one. It seems that this kind of meta is the opposite of making leaps, at least *with* as opposed to an imaginative analytical departure *from* the text. At base, after all, fandom is transformative.

I'm definitely not a transformative fan, even if I'm into many transformative pairings. Usually I get into stuff like Harry/Draco and Thor/Loki from the fandom side; as I said, I often start with fic. It's like a shared universe; I've always enjoyed those. With regular fiction, though, I feel like I'm free floating, not thinking or projecting so much as daydreaming. That's why meta is so natural and organic to me: I can *use* it to deduce things or create order, but in the end it's an open-ended and exploratory process of thinking in concert with the story. To me, thinking and daydreaming and experiencing fiction are naturally one. It's all kind of a single process, an experience in processing other worlds, other characters who are not me. That's why I don't project myself, as I said recently in response to Ivy, I think. I'm experiencing something holistically, which leaves no room for the deconstruction of specifics or questions of 'realism', not unless I focus and force myself to carve out a mental space to ask questions of the sort in the @twocandles discussion earlier.

I would imagine I'm not alone; I'm pretty close to the kind of reader that Ivy describes in her post, for example. Still, this absolute empathetic experience of fiction is... not typical, as far as I can tell. It's probably even less typical that I still enjoy playing around with other people's concrete theories and ideas, as I did with Sherlock. I've seen a lot of people who're mostly like this refusing to make any predictions about Mary or John and Sherlock's arc post-S3. I definitely didn't shy away there; it's definitely not that I'm naturally about seeing ambiguities or shy about my readings. Quite the contrary: I'm generally pretty confident about my reading and what it means (though I can change my mind, because the text always has new things to teach me). I definitely feel like I'm *learning*, generally. I listen to the text, and it normally tells me what it wants me to know, and what it wants me to wonder about. Sometimes I resist (about those Slytherins, Ms. Rowling...), but not for long. I like the meta daydream float too much.

I think in many ways, I've spent 70% of my waking hours suspended in that mental floating daydream state. It's comfy here; Series 4 is just a stone in a pond, like every other story. At least to me.