#theres that like. dim hope thats like im really young yknw? most people fall deeply in love in their late twenties thirties forties.
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sometimes i think about the idea of falling in love a little too much & it makes me sick
#.txt#part of me embraces and loves being aro because aro people are epic as hell#but also i. so badly want to fall in love and have those stupid cheesy cliche moments. but its so disconnected#i cant imagine myself with another person. i yearn for it but the images i conjur up are just. vague ideas or fictional characters yknow?#my longest relationship was nearly entirely online because it was easier to pretend i could. yknow. feel it all if it was detached from me#theres that like. dim hope thats like im really young yknw? most people fall deeply in love in their late twenties thirties forties.#but. but. i cant help but feel so certain that it just wont happen at all. i dont know what it is. but its unattainable#people try to describe what its like to fall in love and my mind is completely blank. theres no room for it#objectively there are people i would date. i guess. but i dont know if i want to date because i am so. stupidly obsessed with Love i auuugh#like. people i would date. i find then attractive. id enjoy being with them. id probably be down to kiss.#but my feelings wouldnt be notably different from the love i have just. for friends. it doesnt change .#sorry im having a crisis at 2am i have work tomorrow. pain
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