#these kind of early formative alliances and friendships as a queer person still figuring things out is SO important

[freedom-shamrock]

Bi the Pricking of my Thumbs

Huge thanks to @galahadwilder for letting me play in your sandbox!  

For those just tuning in, this story comes from THIS post. In case it’s not obvious, this is a piece in honor of pride month. It's safest to assume that no one is straight or cis in this story. If this is a problem for you, if Bi-drien and Bi-nette have no place in your head, this is probably not the story for you, and it would be better for both of us if you just take a hard pass and skip it. Sincere questions are welcome, but bi-phobia will not be tolerated.

Note: Chat’s father is a bigoted fuckwad, and Marinette knows the stats for poor outcomes for queer kids.

Also on AO3.

Chapter 1

"What do you think?" Marinette held up a sketch for Tikki to see the minor modification she wanted to make to her superhero look for the month of June.

"Very tasteful," Tikki said, clapping her little nubs together happily. As she examined the pink, blue and purple striped ribbons.  "They’re clearly a nod to your own sexuality, helping bring awareness and visibility, while remaining your usual professional Ladybug self." She swooped in and nuzzled her holder's cheek. "It's so nice to see society changing their perspective on this matter."

"I can't wait to show Chat." At seventeen, she truly felt her partner was her best friend. Sure, she had very good friends in her civilian life, and some of them even unknowingly backed her up in battle now and again, but over time Chat's unwavering support had risen above the rest. About nine months after getting their miraculous, Master Fu started meeting with them to learn more about their individual specialties and powers. He gave them homework and exercises to work on both alone and together. Despite the covert nature of their time together, it had had the intense bonding impact of a week away at camp, adding to their already strong friendship.

While she still insisted they maintain their secret identities, she'd relaxed a lot as she'd grown more confident and sure of herself as both Ladybug and Marinette. She was no longer opposed to sharing personal details that wouldn't identify them, though in the last year she'd gradually accepted that a reveal wouldn't be such a bad thing. It had been nice to really get to know and understand her partner. Given his isolated upbringing and cold father, it made sense that he'd needed to learn proper social etiquette for pursuing someone romantically. She'd been gratified when he met up with her for training one evening with a heartfelt apology for his self-described "dudebro behavior." He'd been respectful and appropriate ever since.

"Didn't Chat say he was planning on coming out this month?" Tikki asked. "In his civilian life?"

Marinette nodded. “That’s part of why I want to do this, this year. I want to support him for a change.” He'd seen and heard how her own process worked for her. At fifteen, Ladybug came out as bi, letting her test the waters and see if she could handle the reaction without a super suit to deflect the cruelty she expected to follow. The following year, Marinette made it clear to those who hadn't already figured it out. Since it wasn't something she'd actively hidden, it wasn't a big surprise to her friends and family, though it was confirmation for those who didn't already know for sure.

Last year the two heroes had been asked to speak at Paris Pride Fortnight, and Chat Noir made a beautiful heartfelt speech at Tour Montparnasse, ultimately revealing that he wasn't merely a supportive ally, but that he was also bisexual. Only Ladybug knew that her sweet and kind partner was still very firmly in the closet as his unmasked self. She'd been the person he went to when he was starting to question his sexuality, and she'd been first person he'd told once he felt he knew where on the scale he landed. She suspected she was still the only one who knew, and she was excited and hopeful that his friends would be as supportive as hers were.

"It's about time to meet up with him," Marinette said. Technically it was a little early, but Chat was often early to their trainings. It got him out of his house and let him feel free. "Can we give the new ribbons a test run?"

"Of course!" Tikki said brightly. "You know the words."

* * *

Chat looked the part of an utterly dejected kitten when she found him atop the Eiffel Tower. He didn't even try to fake it when she zipped up to their favorite beam and landed beside his hunched form. He glanced at her, a deep hurt clear in his eyes before he returned his gaze to Paris. "Hey Bug," he said softly.

"May I hug you?" She was pretty sure of the answer, but she needed to be sure. "You look like you need a hug or thirty-six."

He let out a totally unamused snort. "I would love a hug, and I'm not sure thirty-six even comes close to what I need." His voice sounded rough, something she'd learned happened  when he'd fought with his father. Shouting and crying were hard on him.

She threw her arms around him, pulling him close. "I'm happy to listen if you want to talk about it. But we can also sit quietly if that would help you more. It's entirely your call."

He took a shuddering breath and burrowed into her shoulder.

"Oh Kitty, I'm so sorry," she murmured, moving to lean against an upright beam so she could better hold his weight. "Whatever it is, I'm here for you."

After many long minutes, he seemed to relax, the shakiness had passed. "It's my father," he muttered. "But you probably already guessed that."

She was starting to think the biggest danger in revealing identities was that she'd straight up murder his father once she knew who he was. The abusive fuckwad.

"I told him that I planned to come out as bi in the next few days, and… I knew he wouldn't like it, so I'd done my research. I had a whole presentation on my planned social media announcements and stuff. I had statistics to show that it wouldn't hurt in faaa - our line of business." He let out a heavy sigh.

"It didn't go well?" She wished everyone had parents like hers.  So supportive and loving.

"Ha!" He let out a mirthless laugh. "Apparently, he didn't realize I wasn't straight." He sat up, rubbing angrily at his face. "I guess that means I've done a good job at hiding it, or maybe he really pays as little attention to me as my friends say."

She caught his hand. "Did he hurt you?"

He cringed and she wished she could take back her words at the pain they obviously caused. "I have no illusions that he loves me.  I'm not sure he's capable of it. And I kind of thought he didn't feel anything, that maybe he wasn't human enough to have emotions anymore, but the disgust… the absolute revulsion he feels for me being bi… it hurt far more than any slap or punch could have."

She scowled out at the lights of Paris. "Just so we're clear here, I hate your father. I've never really hated anything, not truly hated it before.  It's kind of a gross feeling."

"Yeah. I know what you mean." His voice was soft, and she wondered how many times he tried to convince himself that he didn't really hate his father. "Anyway, I… I don't think it's going to be possible for me to be public about my sexuality until I move out. He hauled out his usual array of threats if I go against his wishes and come out as planned."

"Oh my god, is he Hawkmoth?" she demanded. "Because he sure as hell is having a go at being Paris' greatest villain." She shook her head. "You're seventeen.  You know how you feel, and science is behind us on this. Sexuality isn't binary and all evidence suggests that treating your queer kids like there's something wrong with them increases their risk of alcohol and drug use, depression, and suicide." Though she had to miss more meetings than she wanted, she'd joined the Lycee chapter of the Gender and Sexuality Alliance in her first year there. Lots of people thought she was just being supportive of Marc since it was also the year they started collaborating on cross disciplinary projects. With the meetings she’d made it to, she'd learned more than she'd ever wanted to know about poor outcomes for teens like them.

She turned to give Chat a full once-over. "You're not okay, Chat. And that's fair.  It would be unreasonable to expect you to be okay while living in the home of a man who finds your sexuality disgusting. For your own well-being, I think you need to start looking at getting out of there as soon as you can. Whether you get your own place, or you stay with friends, you need to get out of that house."

He nodded, looking a bit surprised by her vehemence.

"You're beautiful and amazing, and I'm so proud of you." She caught his face in both her hands. "You are perfect the way you are. There's absolutely nothing wrong with you."

Even in the low light, she caught the warm flush of pink in his cheeks. "Thanks, Milady."

"And I need you to do me a favor." She picked up one of his hands, clasping it firmly between hers.

"Anything," he whispered.

"I need you to tell me immediately if you ever feel like harming yourself.” She was completely serious, and she saw surprise on his face.

“Oh, I’d never…”

She shook her head. “No Chat. You may think you’d never, right now. But that can change. And it can change so fast.” She squeezed his hand. “You may feel like you’re deflecting your father’s hostility and negative reaction, but some of that gets through. And it will every time. It will add up, and it can suffocate you. So promise, please.”

Understanding washed away the surprise. He nodded.

“I need you, Kitty,” she said gently. “I really can’t do this without you. I wouldn’t have the heart to keep doing it.”

His smile was weak and watery, but it was sincere. “Thanks Milady.”

“And you’ll work on getting out of the house?” she asked, certain it was the long-term solution he really needed.

“I’m going to need to think that one over a bit more,” he admitted with a shrug. “There’s… a lot to consider.”

“There is,” she agreed. “And if you can’t figure it all out, let me know.  I’ll help. I’ll find you a place to stay if need be.”

He hugged her again, for a long moment.

As she tightened her grip on him, she considered what else he could to to feel better. “Maybe you should find one friend, one person who you know will absolutely not blab to others, and let them know. You deserve to have someone in your regular life who you can share this stuff with.”

“It seems unfair to burden any of my friends with this secret,” he admitted.

“My Maman has a saying about that,” she pointed out. “A burden shared, is a burden halved. Just make sure it’s someone who will respect your need for secrecy.”

“I’ll think about it,” he agreed. “Like seriously and for real.

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Check out Chapter Two >>

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This was supposed to be a quick one shot, but I now expect it to be 3-4 chapters.

And if you’re so inclined, feel free to support me over on Ko-Fi