#theyre born with the urge to create but they do not know What to create and just stumble about until the world changes for the good

[thiscatisbisexual]

Thinks about my giant centaur gods and their attempts at creating a living world.

[kemalamalam]

RULES: post 5 songs associated with your OCs and 4 outfits they'd wear

i saw @bhaalsdeepbat doing the tag game and i wanna make one too i hope you dont mind 👉👈

huehuehue this is Chevrotain, my durge bard

they got fucking wormed half way through the game and became hard to look at so i changed their hair then they look half-decent (not as good looking as the default but still)

im gonna be sorta infodumping about their lore bc im insane for them

1. Bloody! Bloody! - Junie & TheHutFriends

so in my canon Chevrotain isnt the dark urge like the origin character but another bhaalspawn, theyre still a bhaalspawn though so their gameplay is still a durge playthrough and this song is so accurate to durge's storyline?? like

Ain't it funny how I scare myself sometimes

..You take his hand quite literally..

..I probably shouldn't have said that..

They said, the lady in red / Bloody! Bloody!

Durge being literally shocked at kicking the squirrel involuntarily?? / the Gale incident / durge saying freakish shit most of the time / literally Orin

this song is my number one go to when i think of Chevrotain 😭

2. Abbey - Mitski

i mentioned that Chevrotain is a cannibal 🥺 its funny bc they dont have any sense of taste, they also have a huge identity crisis thanks to Bhaal whispering to them on their "role" and they whole "you were created bc blah blah blah"

I am hungry I have been hungry I was born hungry What do I need? I am something I have been something I was born something What could I be?

the theme i like to go with them is "starvation", like being starved of fatherly love from Bhaal, being starved of their own identity, being starved of their own mind, being starved of a home.. so this song fits into it SO PERFECTLY

3. Our Word - 36 Questions, Jessie Shelton

GAH this song is so cool from the coolest musical i know (i only know like 6 musicals 🙃), its literally a musical podcast?? so cool.

anyways Chevrotain is a bard right, they usually manipulate people with their words, a lot of deception and persuasion bonuses, so they are a very deceitful and as a result they are a very distrusting person.

the song is about a girl who was raised to be a compulsive liar - when she accidentally broke her dad's ship in a bottle - her mom told her to lie to get out of trouble and it worked, so she kept lying and lying and lying to get herself out of situations.

the song ends with a near death experience, but all she can think in her dying moments is how her parents are going to lie about her existence just to avoid the hassle of dealing with her death.

And it's our word Yes, our word It's our word Yes, our word Against theirs

the thing about Chevrotain is that they cannot trust easily - and what they fear the most is that theyd be tricked the same way theyve been tricking others - its a constant for them and this song embodies it perfectly (･ω･)b

4. Animal Cannibal - Possibly in Michigan, Karen Skladany

haha cannibal mention

iconic song tbh, this one isnt as intricately tied to Chevrotain's character quirks in my mind as the others and its more of their whole vibe and sthick

Who knows how some people turn to strange ones Is it up to me to make them into dead ones? (Here we go again) I bite at the hand that feeds me Slap at the face that eats me Some kind of animal cannibal (Animal? Cannibal)

the tricking people into thinking theyre an unassuming bard even though theyre an experienced necromancer

and that they rebel against Bhaal pretty aggressively (well, as aggressive as you can when youre going against your literal God father without being punished by death 💀) such as never calling Bhaal as "father" pre-amnesia

5. The Milk Carton - Madilyn Mei

have i ever mentioned here that Chevrotain fell into the Feywild when they were around 9?

they were following a grinning cat named 'Alice Alice van Malice' who later became their guardian because fucking Ethel spotted baby Tain, took them in bc she realize that a bhaalspawn would make a strong hagspawn, since Alice didnt want to be responsible for a horrific fate of a child he decided to keep watch of them 😭

so this song is more to baby Tain's perspective, that they are now living in a stinky swamp in the Feywild and sleeping on a cold slab of stone instead of the cozy foster home they were in before..

I think I really miss my bed Oh when, oh when will the nightmare end? I had it good, I had it good And yet I left and can't retrace my steps Think I forgot a couple things My brain is still at home (Stop telling me all about your problems)

..but hey, at least theyre not dead!

Outfits/Style

Chevrotain's style is called classy and youthful in the DnD universe and timeline, but in todays world we call it grandmacore ❤

ok well it has a prince-like flare to it, the embroidery would be all silver bc one thing about Chevrotain is that theyre good at commiting to the bit, also the clothes beinf airy, flowy and puffy is important bc they dont like their clothes being skin tight bc they get uncomfortable easy.

its all billowy blouse + black pants combo bc its a classic and i love it SO MUCH, i eat this combo all the time everytime

im too shy to tag anyone else for this akdnsjnd anyone who wants to join in from seeing this post.. please tag me in it bc im nosy and i want to see ur Tav/Durge :3

[vapidsims]

Got tagged by @erosims on Newtumbl but i’ll post it here too!

Whom should I- Mathias. its Mathias

1. How old is your sim? 

good question. young adult but im not finna put an exact year-span on him

2. When is your sim’s birthday?

He dosnt have one. but if he’d been born he wouldve been a winter baby.

3. What is your sim’s zodiac sign?

-scrambles to zodiac site- uhhhhhhhhh either Libra or aquarius

4. What is your sim’s ethnicity?

 he dosnt really have one. but I have an au where hes human and is asian/white

5. Does your sim have any nicknames?  

Boltboi

Math

6. Do they have a job? 

He dont even got a shirt on. where he gon work at?

7. Where does your sim live?

currently Oasis springs. moving soon.

8. Who does your sim live with?

His sleeping brothers and creator previously. Hes gonna be sticking with Rae now tho.

9. What environment did your sim grow up in?

 bad.

10. What are your sim’s favorite foods?

he doesnt need to eat. 

11. What is your sim’s favorite drink?

Alien juice.

12. If they have one what is your sim’s favorite color? 

neon blue/ royal purple

13. Does your sim believe in any clichés?

 not yet xD

14. What is your sim’s sexuality?

 Raesexual  hes not sure

15. What is your sim’s gender identity?

Male. He/Him/His

16. Is your sim type a or type b? 

what?

17. Is your sim introverted or extroverted?

Introverted.

18. What is your sims favorite woohoo position?

-sweats-

19. Is your sim a pet person? If so what is their favorite animal? 

Yes. cats and dogs. but dogs will make him nervous after a bit because theyre so waggy and bouncy.

20. Does your sim have a best friend?

Rae. Various other sims not introduced yet

21. What is/was your sim’s favorite school subject?

wtf is school?

22. Is/was your sim a high, mid or low achiever in school?

N/A

23. Are they planning to go or have they already been to college? If so, what would be or what was their major?

hmmmm. no

24. What are your sims political beliefs? (if they have them) 

N/A at the moment.

25. What is one thing your sims wants to do before they die?

Nothing really before Rae stumbled into his life. he was somewhat content with existing and then... not. Though he did muse about meeting his brothers whenever Andrews decided to “awaken” them. 

26. Does your sim have a favorite tv show (cable) and/or movie?

He gonna  interested in romance movies xD 

27. Is your sim a Netflix viewer? If so what are their top 3 shows.

Not yet

28. Does your sim like books? If so what’s their favorite one?

He's had limited access to books, but he read atlas hugged a few times. 

29. Does your sim enjoy video games, if so what is their favorite one and do they play on pc or console?

 not in the traditional sense. he likes those virtual boxes.

30. What is your sim’s personal style?

hes shiny. 

31. Does your sim have a lucky charm?

No

32. Is your sim religious? 

No

33. What kind of music does your sim listen to and who is their favorite artist? 

-resist the urge to say electric music-

34. Is your sim a festive person? If so what’s their favorite holiday? 

Hes gonna love the romance festival (hes a lover boy)

35. What is your sim’s favorite type of weather?

snow, it makes him feel grounded to the world for some reason.

36. Does your sim prefer to start fights or finish them? 

Under the right or wrong circumstances Mathias will absolutely fuck a bitch up. But you’d have to had really trampled this boys last nerve first. XD

37. Does your sim have a dream job?

 no

38. Does your sim have any siblings? 

Yes. Marios, Marcus and Myrder. whom are all still unactive. then Circe (deceased) if we wanna count her.

39. Does your sim get along with their family? 

(’>.>)

40. What is your sims favorite hobby? 

turns out he likes the dancing thing. and cooking.

41. What does your sim look for in a romantic partner? 

he aint picky. hes lived in a hole his whole life. but hes pulled towards free spirited/unbound energy.

42. What is a secret about your sim? 

We already know he was created after Andrews “obtained” some sixam tech. What we (well mathias really) dont know is the affair was a little...murdery.

43. What is a wish your sim has? 

He keeps feeling things. He wants to feel more things, to grasp the gravity of it. 

44. What is a flaw your sim has? 

Anxious, overthinking, quietly tempermental, passive-agressive-

45. How do others generally perceive your sim? 

Curious, adorable, strange, anxious, moody, clueless.

46. Does your sim have a greatest achievement? 

Leaving.

47. If they have one, what is your sim’s greatest regret? 

being unable to move his father.

48. Does your sim have a favorite emoji?

no

49. Does your sim use simstagram? 

No

50. What is the last text your sim sent (and who did they text)?

no phone?

[maxtrashpng]

Tagged by @laggage ! (sorry this took so long! i saw it last night but i was already heading to bed) 1.) Nicknames: none :^(

2.) Gender: Agender 3.) Star sign: Cancer

4.) Height: 5'9″

5.) Time: 11:00am 6.) Birthday: july 12th

7.) Favorite band: Courtship.

8.) Favorite solo artist: St. Vincent 

9.) Song stuck in my head:  The Marías - I Don't Know You

10.) Last movie you watched: P sure I rewatched Baby Driver for the 12th time a couple weeks ago lmao

(also what the fuck love actually, give the women above 30 love interests, make em gay, it would be so much better)

11.) Last show you watched: Parks n Rec

12.) When did I create my blog: August 2012 im p sure

13.) What do I post: uhh shit posts, overwatch, other stuff. its mostly shit posts. 14) Last thing I googled: computer speakers

15.) Do you have other blogs: i have urls saved, but otherwise no i dont have any others

16.) Biggest muse at the moment: I think its obvious but overwatch, its gotten me to do stuff that ive never been comfortable with (using voice chat in game, literally just playing with other people online in a game) used to give me super bad anxiety, i still get nervous playing but yeah! also have the urge to draw the characters 24/7, also makin me real happy! 17.) Why did you choose your url: I thought it flowed nicely lmao, also my name and jokingly calling myself trash

18.) Following: 547

19.) Followers: 727

20.) Favorite colors: red, blue, pastel yellow, teal, coral

21.) Average hours of sleep: maybe 5 or 6

22.) Lucky number(s): tbh ive never been one for lucky numbers but i usually choose numbers that relate to my birthday like 7 or 12 when it comes to it

23.) Instruments I played: I used to play cello for school but school was complicated for me and i ended up switching to art class and ended up forgetting how to play :^/

24.) What am I wearing: ghoul grumps shirt, black jacket, and harley quinn pajama pants bc im doing this when im supposed to be getting ready for a appointment lmao

25.) How many blankets I sleep with: 2

26.) Dream job: concept artist or illustrator 

27.) Dream trip: idk always though japan looked really cool, but also cannon beach in oregon, even tho ive been, its really nice

28.) Favorite food: idk if i really have one tbh! but i’ll say crepes so somethings here bc theyre great

29.) Nationality: American

30.) Favorite song: rn its Sweet Dreams by BORNS

(Not tagging anyone cause i gotta go like rN, but do this if youd like!)

Thank you again!! <3

[polistini]

To preface the deal of what happened between Kolstad and Uhlir I think its a good idea to explain what exactly they both are. Kolstad is something that people dub a 'boogeyman'. Theyre beings that have assumed the responsibility of guiding people onto the path that individual deems to be right, and some use fear to get this. Others assimilate into human populations and do so in more casual and healthy ways by being in positions of guidance. Kolstad has been around for centuries and has done that in many places around the world. At the time they met Uhlir they had been a town's priest during a time where people didnt bathe regularly and monsters were a very big very real fear (i havnt settled on a era yet)

Uhlir is a ghoul, which are beings who are birthed looking like human babies and replace a couples actual child or leave theirs outside the homes of welcoming people, and is raised until the ghoul child becomes unruly and runs into the wilderness and assumes a more monstrous form. They have to eat meat to live essentially. They can live for hundreds of years but they need to eat more and more as time goes on to keep from rotting, and they often scavenge anywhere they can to keep from decomposing more.

One of Kolstad's duties in their job was to essentially maintain a graveyard near the church they lived in, during a winter they had noticed some graves were being dug up and desecrated. This troubles their community so it troubles them too and one night they decide to stay in the graveyard to try to catch whatever it is doing that.

Kolstad essentially catches Uhlir digging up things to eat in the graveyard and because Kolstad just genuinely likes beings of all kind and understands he doesnt do this out of spite, they decide to try to help him. Uhlir initially tries to tear them limb from limb because ghouls know people are dangerous and not to be trusted. Kolstad isnt human and could easily overpower Uhlir if need be but they dont want Uhlir to Know because they dont want any sort of agreement of help to be borne from fear.

So after convincing Uhlir they arent there to hurt them Uhlir tentatively agrees to stop digging up the graveyard if Kolstad brings them food. Which Kolstad does for weeks and Uhlir realizes there is actually no danger and Kolstad must just be either really clueless or really weird (or both) and starts somewhat talking to them for a while. During one of these talks Kolstad offers Uhlir a place to stay at the church/their home and essentially join the human town under the cover of being a wayward person in need. Uhlir vanishes for a while after that to mull things over but ultimately agrees because Kolstad says he can leave if he doesnt like it.

But he does like it because ghouls are typically solitary and fight a lot, so its nice to be able to talk to someone without worrying about them trying to bite your face off. Kolstad is similarly happy because Uhlir doesnt really care about their status in the People Communities and treats them like any other rando and in a way its comforting. Because of their guiding intents Kolstad is often in positions where just being someones friend is often weird or would create an uncomfortable power imbalance that they would like to avoid.

The two live together for quite some time and become very close. They live together, work together and are nearly inseparable, despite the towns initial confusion and suspicion they ultimately accept Uhlir. Things are good and both genuinely feel as though theyve finally found a true friend after centuries of near isolation. They continue on like this for quite some time more before things begin to take a downward spiral.

While Uhlir is out he is approached by other ghouls which is, weird to say the least because they are territorial and solitary. The other ghouls essentially heard that one of their own has assimilated into an actual human population which is goddamn Unheard of. Uhlir tries to just ignore them because hes happy and thats fine who gives a shit right? The other ghouls begin talking about how this must be some sort of cruel stunt and that humans always end up doing the selfish thing and betraying each other, let alone a monstrous outsider.

Now this gets Uhlir thinking and worrying about if Kolstad has been stringing him along the whole time, maybe waiting for a perfect time to expose him. To have him killed or chased away to show power maybe. He attempts to push those kind of thoughts away but unfortunately the seed of doubt has been planted rather firmly. Uhlir had been hurt before by people and has seen the damage they can do, whats to say Kolstad was any different?

The thing is, Kolstand isnt a human. They know full and well the way humans can be towards things that go bump in the night, and they do their best to not be the same way. But they wont tell Uhlir the truth of their origin because an entity like them is one feared by nearly every creature. Kolstads worse fear is that Uhlir will find out about their nature and suddenly their equal friendship will turn into Uhlir only sticking around out of fear.

There is a hitch in their communication and Uhlir begins to withdraw and Kolstad has absolutely no idea why. In a rather short period of time Uhlir has convinced himself that he needs to get Kolstad before they can get him. He keeps thinking theres no way someone would bother to do all this without some ulterior motive. Uhlir begins to form a plan that would 'save' them from ever being turned upon.

Ultimately Uhlir decides to create false evidence of Kolstad being the monster, not him. He claims they were the one tearing up graves and they were the one doing everything that was out of the ordinary. They manage to actually turn the entire area against Kolstad and leads a Literal Angry Mob into the church while Kolstad is in there cleaning. He figures that the town people can 'dispose' of Kolstad and then he can take their place and be safe and no one can ever turn against him. Its not rational thinking whatsoever.

Kolstad had not been expecting any of this and suddenly theyre greeted with the people theyve cared for over a span of decades and their only genuine friend demanding that they be put on trial to expose their monstrous nature. The townsfolk all urge Uhlir to the one to expose Kolstad since he is the one who was the "sole witness" of Kolstads monstrous state. To Uhlir Kolstad is just a person, who will be killed by the trial and then he thinks he can live his life without the fear of betrayal.

Kolstad is stunned and shocked and hurt in ways that cannot be simply described in words. They decide that if they want to see a monster they have no choice but to oblige. They reveal their giant ice void fear being form and thats when Uhlir realizes the severity of the mistake they have made. He only understand that Kolstad literally never had any intent to hurt him or anyone once its too late. Hes left genuinely wordless and the rationality in his brain finally clicks on and he kinda just gawks in horror at what he has just done.

Of course now theres no fixing the situation, theres no chance of redemption, no possibility of going back to how things were. The towns people are in hysterics and chuck whatever they can grab at Kolstad out of fear and rage and they just, sadly, slowly, leave. There is nothing for them to to say and they have no heart to attempt to "fix" a completely ruined situation. Once Kolstad has left/ been chased out of the town Uhlir is congratulated by the townspeople for ridding their area of such an evil being. Uhlir is just shell shocked and wants to crawl down his own throat and die.

Uhlir attemps to find Kolstad for months after this but theyre long gone, and they have No intentions of coming back. You really wanged that one up, Uhlir. Good Job.

The whole situation fucked Kolstad up so bad they wandered forests in complete isolation for nearly 70 years just kinda attempting to come to terms with what happened. They slowly began to re-assimilate into human society but has been on a much more down low level. Only in the Present Time have they began to make 'friends' again, but even then they hold people at an arms length. Its been actual centuries and its still something they get upset about from time to time.

Uhlir's whereabouts are unknown and he may or may not be alive anymore but lord knows he  regretted everything Way too late.

[neliedoria]

Game On

Originally posted here some time ago.

Eli had avoided Erudition for several days, choosing instead to haunt her ancestral home while she tried to come to grips with all that had happened.  She may not have been there in person, but her eyes had seen all and relayed it all back to their mistress.  Another unfamiliar pang caught at her heart, the woman’s pacing pausing as she breathed through it.  

The woman who seemed to be a new constant at her brother’s side merited little thought from her as yet, but at the same token Eli could appreciate that she had kept close through all that Ailos had endured.  It had been difficult, watching him writhe and scream and trying so hard to hold back the urge to rush to him; to try and keep him tethered and safe.  She had seen the writing on the wall even as he’d stuck his hand in the ground, she had noticed the changes that were already beginning to take their hold even before his great fall.  Her pets hovered ever close, so near so that not a word passed without her hearing it, not a thing happening without her seeing it - the little good it did when all was said and done.  

It was a hard pill to swallow.  To have born witness to the hidden face Ailos had shown her briefly when they had reconciled was one thing.  To know that he had fallen entirely, embracing that darkness that clung to him, just waiting for that perfect moment to strike - it made her nauseous to even think about it.  He was supposed to be the incorruptible one.  The Light had always shone so brightly for him and from him as far back as she could remember…and to watch? Unable to act as that flame was snuffed out?  It tore at the woman.  

The servants seemed to understand that something was wrong, that something had happened to put her in a way.  Always unpredictable even in her younger and better days, Ailos’s staff gave the younger woman a wide berth.  So it was with some surprise that there came the rapping of knuckles at the door to her rooms.  Anger at the intrusion lashed out at the unfortunate behind the ornate wood, revealed a moment later to be Altiel.  The same Altiel who stared down at her, unamused when she snarled at him.

“What do you want?”

“You have a visitor.”

“There is no one I wish to see right now.”

“Which is precisely what I told the fellow, but that he then handed me one of these.  You will speak to him.”

Eli bristled and bowed up, preparing to rip the older man a new one for his audacity but that the sigil on the small packet caught her eye and she paled visibly.  She snatched the packet out of Altiel’s grasp, turning it over this way and that as if it were some sort of prank, that her eyes were playing tricks on her.

“Show him in,” she ordered, turning away from the door with the packet caught tightly between her hands.  Her eyes fluttered shut and she exhaled long and slow, trying to collect herself before she heard the movement behind her.  A familiar enough gait, one she recognized from one of the trio who were among her most trusted associates.  He dropped to a knee as she turned back around to close the distance.  

“Apologies to you for the intrusion, mistress,” the man murmured, tilting his head to the side to give Altiel a look where he’d set himself up to listen with the doors closed behind him.  Eli scowled, but waved her hand to soothe his conscience and to speed things up.

“Pay no mind to him Vyen.  Whether he hears this now or later, it will not matter.  What is the meaning of this?  Where did you get it?”  It was then she took note of the small chest between the man’s hands.  

“It was found with the normal correspondences, mistress.  No one saw it delivered, no one saw anyone or anything unusual.  It created quite a stir, as you can imagine.  Our…place of business is secure as it has ever been.  Or was until this.  There was only a small card with your name on it.  We opened it to ensure it wasn’t something explosive or dangerous, or so far as we could tell.  After seeing the sigil, I came straight away despite your warnings to keep our distance.”

“No, you were right to come,” she said lowly, looking from the small packet she had in hand to the chest stuffed full with neatly packed rows of similar packets.  She gave it a small shake, a furrow working itself between her brows at the muffled rattling sound.  There was no label to identify the contents, absolutely nothing save for the disturbing sigil that marked the packet and all those in the chest.  Briefly she raised her eyes to Altiel’s before she cautiously ran a fingernail along the seal.  She tipped the packet over into her hand, the furrow deepening further at the half a dozen seeds toppled onto her palm.  A sharp breath hissed between her teeth, and she hurled the seeds away from her as if they burned.  "Of course,“ she snarled, her fingers balling up into a fist as she began to pace, anger warring with the touch of fear that would flit across her features.  "They’re quick, but how could even they know that fast?”  She muttered softly as if there weren’t still two other occupants within the room.  

’Look what havoc a single seed wrought.  Here are a metric shit ton just to drive home that we know.’  "Snide sons of bitches.  I’ll run each and every one of the bastards through for this,“ she growled, coming out of her brief reverie to pause and stare down both Vyen and Altiel.  Stalking forward she snatched free one of the packets and flung it towards Altiel.  

"See what you can find.  I’ve my methods, you put yours to work as well if you wish to keep him safe.  No matter how much or little you manage to dredge up, report it to me.”  Eli didn’t bother waiting for his response before turning back to her minion.  Another packet was passed over to Vyen, then after a moment two more for his brothers in arms with the same order.  She picked up the chest without another word and strode through the winding halls of the estate.  Only when she reached the large courtyard did she stop, plucking free a few more packets that were safely tucked away before she dropped the chest to the ground with a clatter.  She closed her eyes, sending a silent command to her two remaining pets that were nearby, the third still trailing her brother closely, so that they flew swiftly and silently around the surrounding land.  

That seen to, her eyes roved over the landscape briefly before she held out a hand and tried to call on the magic that ran innately through their blood, though she never had so much skill in it past a few parlor tricks.  It was enough though, to call forth a small ball of flame that danced and flickered over her palm, a few wispy tongues of Fel green dancing among the natural fire.  With little pomp or flare, she hurled the flame at the chest, a small smile of satisfaction curling her lips as it burst into a bright ball of fire.  

“Be careful just who it is you think you’re toying with.  I won’t play nearly so nicely as some others,” she said for the benefit of any ears that happened to be nearby, standing there until nothing remained but ash.