superchat · 6 months ago
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this could be the start of a trend where stories that really grab me has a long running chant that is nonsensical but just coherent enough to be convincing
Where lies the strangling fruit that came from the hand of the sinner I shall bring forth the seeds of the dead to share with the worms that gather in the darkness and surround the world with the power of their lives while from the dimlit halls of other places forms that never were and never could be writhe for the impatience of the few who never saw what could have been. In the black water with the sun shining at midnight, those fruit shall come ripe and in the darkness of that which is golden shall split open to reveal the revelation of the fatal softness in the earth. The shadows of the abyss are like the petals of a monstrous flower that shall blossom within the skull and expand the mind beyond what any man can bear, but whether it decays under the earth or above on green fields, or out to sea or in the very air, all shall come to revelation, and to revel, in the knowledge of the strangling fruit—and the hand of the sinner shall rejoice, for there is no sin in shadow or in light that the seeds of the dead cannot forgive. And there shall be in the planting in the shadows a grace and a mercy from which shall blossom dark flowers, and their teeth shall devour and sustain and herald the passing of an age. That which dies shall still know life in death for all that decays is not forgotten and reanimated it shall walk the world in the bliss of not-knowing. And then there shall be a fire that knows the naming of you, and in the presence of the strangling fruit, its dark flame shall acquire every part of you that remains.
You are a worm though time. The thunder song distorts you. Happiness comes. White pearls, but yellow and red in the eye. Through a mirror, inverted is made right. Leave your insides by the door. Push the fingers through the surface into the wet. You’ve always been the new you. You want this to be true. We stand around while you dream. You can almost hear our words but you forget. This happens more and more now. You gave us the permission in your regulations. We wait in the stains. The word that describes this is redacted. Repeat the word. The name of the sound. It resonates in your house. After the song, time for applause. We build you till nothing remains. The egg cracks and the truth will emerge out of you. You are home. You remind us of home. You’ve taken your boss with your boss with you. All hair must be eaten. Under the conceptual reality behind this reality you must want these waves to drag you away. After the song, time for applause. This cliché is death out of time, breaking the first the second the third the fourth wall, fifth wall, floor; no floor: you fall! How do you say “insane”? Hurts to be happy. An ear worm is a tune you can’t stop humming in a dream: “baby baby baby yeah”. Just plastic. So, safe and nothing to worry about. Ha ha, funny. The last egg breaks now. The hole in your room is a hole in you. You came and we let you in through the hole in you. You have always been here, the only child. A copy of a copy of a copy. Orange peel. The picture is you holding the picture. When you hear this you will know you’re in new you. You want to listen. You want to dream. You want to smile. You want to hurt. You don’t want to be.
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chocojjk · 6 years ago
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Eggs
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summary: badboy! changbin if you squint 
words: 7k
warnings: one mention of death by illness
a/n: this took way too long cause i got so lazy lmfao, slide into my inbox with prompts cause idk what to write after this 
not edited per usual, im lazy :(((
you and changbin lived in different worlds
changbin has always been the schools most notorious bad boy
along with his group, 3racha
he was the typical bad boy -- gets into fights, wears leather, barely shows up to class, etc.
after watching countless of rom-coms, you and i, reader, should know that bad boys like to keep to themselves
and they won't bother you unless you cross their territory, not at all different from changbin
someone bullies one of his friends???
you might as well run now , because he will be coming for your ass
he catches you talking shit?
you should probably say goodbye to your mouth and have a doctors appointment ready
the point im trying to make is that seo changbin does not take shit from anyone
which doesn't really matter at this point because everyone has learned to fear him
on the other hand, you're, what they say is a “good girl”
too caught up with your books and your grades, in the library 24/7, worrying too much about the future you envision
you stayed away from drama as much as possible, happy with the 2-3 friends that you have  
and,,,
well,,,
you probably saw this coming,, but just in case you didnt, ill say it
your two different worlds are about to collide
---------------
youve been searching for a little over 20 minutes to where he could be when you finally spotted him at the table all way in the back of the library
you let out the deepest sigh, you shouldve figured he would choose that table jfc
‘he really is sticking to his reputation’ you think to yourself as you made your way over to him
“hi, im y/n, i'm your tutor,” you say, giving him a soft smile
changbin doesn't even bother to reply to you as he got up and left
you were left standing there like,,,
what the fuck just happened ??
before you finally snapped out of your confused trance and chased after him
catching up to him you grab his arm, putting a complete halt to his movement
and suddenly the library was even quieter than it should be
every single eye in the room focused on the interaction that lies in front of them
the notorious bad boy and the goody two shoes,,, how incredibly cliche
he looks at you, his eyes dark and unreadable
the expression on his face was emotionless yet it felt like he was crushing you under his stare
finally noticing that your hand was still gripped around his arm, you quickly let go, letting out a small “ehem”
the tension in the air was thick, it felt like someone just put a dark cloud above your head and you couldn’t blow it away
god damn this was awkward
not even the good awkward where you can laugh about it later, this is the kind of awkward situation that hits you in the middle of the night and suddenly you're just cringing at every bad thing you have done in the past
“uhm, im suppose to tutor you,” you try to say confidently as soon as you found your voice, but really it was barely above a whisper
“maybe show up on time,” he says, his voice as dark and as strong as his aura
and with one final look at you, he walked out of there
you didnt bother anymore, you knew you were at fault
‘we’ll try again tomorrow,’ you think to yourself before your best friend, hyunjin walked up to you, pulling you outside the library  
“dude are you okay?”
“uhmm, why wouldn’t i be?”
“i just saw you talking to changbin”
“ok and ?”
“he’s bad news y/n,” your best friend says, warning you
“ i dont really have a choice hyunjin” you reply
you think back to 3 days ago when you were called to the principal's office
not gonna lie, you were shaking in your boots,, only bad kids get randomly sent to the principal's office
as you entered the room, Mrs. Seo was already waiting for you behind her desk
“hi ms. l/n, i dont think weve formally met,” she says, reaching out to shake your hand
“ its nice to meet you”
“ please, sit down, make yourself comfortable,” she continued, pointing to the seat right in front of her
sensing your nervousness she quickly added a, “don't worry, you're not in trouble”
phew
your brain was starting to hurt from trying to rack what you must have done wrong to be seated in the big office
“ why am i here then if you don't mind me asking?”
“ ah yes, i need you to tutor my son”
,,,,,
oh
(◎_◎;)
,,,
“umm, why me?”
“you're top 1 in the class, is there anyone better than you to do it?”
well,,, she wasn't wrong
you mentally pat yourself at the back for this, happy that your efforts were being noticed
“don't worry ms. l/n, if you succeed, i’ll make sure you get into any college that you desire “
‘pshhhh, im top 1 ms seo, i can do that on my own’ you think to yourself 
“....and fully paid for.”
well, shit , how can you say no to that offer
its literally free education right in your fingertips  
what's the catch??
“ you can do that?” you ask
“ of course. i know very important people. so what do you say?”
and after a few minutes of contemplating within yourself, you finally agreed
“ also, while you're at it, i want you to change my son's reputation.”
and there it is
“ i'm sorry?” you reply,, maybe you just misheard the fact that she literally asked you to change her son
“ i don't just want you to tutor him in english, i want you to make him a better person.”
“how do you expect me to do that?”
“be his friend. teach him the ways of life, i'm not always gonna be around to get him out of trouble. You're a smart girl ms. l/n you'll figure it out.”
without giving you a final say, she ushered you out of there but not before she added
“ one last thing ms. l/n, dont tell anyone about this.”
the way she said it was so scary, and its like a spell was casted on you and you could only utter out an
“ of course mam”
i guess from her standpoint, she made sense
“ i just dont understand why Mrs. Seo chose you out of all the people”
“ we’ve already gon over this hyunjin”
“ yeah yeah, its cause youre the smartest of the class-”
hyunjin continues to talk however you’ve tuned him out as your eyes went to focus on changbin, himself
greeting the rest of his friends, an actual smile on his face, much different from the changbin you encountered a couple minutes ago
he gets up on his motorcycle and was about ready to put his helmet on when he felt someone staring at him ( i told yall, tYpiCAl bad boy )
he whips his head around in quick search for the culprit
and for the second time that day, you found yourself looking in the dark brown eyes of the the one and only, seo changbin
his smile quickly disappearing once he found your eyes
putting on his helmet whilst still maintaining the eye contact, he quickly drove away and you can't help but continue to just watch his figure retreat to the size of a dot until he was completely away from your line of vision
the next day - friday
you were in the library, seated in the table changbin used the day before
unlike yesterday, you were there dummy early
exactly 30 minutes before the actual tutoring session
he wasn't going to get away this time
finally , the chair across from you gets occupied, a backpack loudly flopping its way unto the table
he doesn't say a word,
he doesn't even look at you
he just sits there, staring at the table between you guys
“uhm, i think we got on the wrong foot yesterday, im y/n”
you say, a wide smile on your face, trying to change the atmosphere
he scoffs at this
‘omyfuckinggod who does he think he is’
‘im gonna fucking murder this kid’
‘his mom was right when he said he needed to change’
as much as you wanted to just punch him in the face, you plastered a small smile on your face instead
“should we start?” you continue
“i guess”
for the next hour, you learn that changbin doesn’t even need tutoring
he was definitely smarter than he lead on
he knew the answer to every single question you asked and didnt even seem like he was trying 
“uhmm, changbin can i ask you something?”
he just nods at you, urging you to go on
“are you failing your class on purpose?”
and with that he stands up, giving you a small smirk, “i think this session is over,”
“i-okay- i-i’ll see you on monday!” you say even though he was already a good 5 feet away from you  
-----------
as you laid in your bed that night, you wondered why the boy chose to fail his class
but no matter what scenario you could think of, you just cant understand it
is this what privileged people do ?
they know that they can get away with anything so they dont even try ?
‘aish, why am i thinking about him,’
‘y/n stop it’
‘ahhhhh’
you tried forcing yourself to sleep, to completely shut off all thoughts
but damn that stupid smirk on his face just keeps reappearing
and with that you slapped your pillow unto your face, not at all excited for the days to come
saturday night - 9 pm
to be honest, you weren't the type to go out on a saturday night
however you stayed in bed the whole day binging your netflix shows that you completely forgot to run your errands
so now you're here, at the local supermarket, buying your weekly groceries
you may be asking why can't your parents just do it?
well,,,
you only live with your mom, and she was very busy running the night shift at the hospital + picking up extra shifts
so she's really never home 
and when she is, she crashes right to sleep, exhausted from work
so ever since two years ago, when you turned 16, this has been the life that you were used to
you weren't complaining of course, she was only working to provide for you and your future
the least you could do is help around the house
after a good 7 minutes, you finally gathered everything that you needed
eggs, check
bread, check
peanut butter, check
a bag of hot cheetos,,,, check check and check
you nodded, proud of yourself for finishing it so fast and made your way to your car until a loud crash stops you from doing so
the next thing you know, you were being dragged into the alleyway
“1!!!!1111! I- get off of me,” you say thrashing and kicking, trying to get away
‘oh god, im gonna die tonight,’
‘if there is a god out there,, pls,,, not tonight’
‘i haven't finished my netflix series yet,, plssss’
however your thoughts were cut short when your captor whispered, “shhh, its changbin”
changbin??
chaNgbIN???
chANGBIN???
he finally turns you around, making you face him
“play along if you don't want to get hurt,”
and in one quick motion, his lips were on yours,,,
seo changbin was kissing you
your eyes open, stunned at what was happening
and then you noticed it...5 men walking around the area
and hoping that you've watched the right dramas, you pieced together what you think is happening
leading you to closing your eyes and kissing him back
which honestly caught changbin off guard, “good girls” dont react this way???
but he’d never let you know that, as he pulled you closer to him,
his arms snaking  around your waist
your hands going around his neck, the grocery bag being forgotten
yall were full on making out now
too caught up with each other’s taste to even notice the 5 guys leaving
(((im really bad at writing these kinds of scenes jfc, this sounds awkward as hell pls just picture it)))
until finally after like 23823 years, you pulled away, trying to catch your breath
damn, that kiss was good
probably the best one you’ve ever had
what????
just cause you're a goody-two-shoes doesn't mean you haven't been kissed before okay,,, were not going THAT cliche
he slowly lets go of you, his eyes darting to the grocery bag on the ground
“your eggs are broken,” he says
“m-my eggs?”, you reply, still on cloud nine,
following his gaze, you snapped out of your daze
“oh, r-right, my eggs,” you say softly, a frown making its way upon your face
changbin grabs your hand, pulling you towards the grocery store
“what are you doing?”
as usual, he doesn’t reply
honestly, you should be used to this by now
he dashes around the supermarket
you were right behind him, trying to keep up with his fast paced speed
finally, he gets to his location, the egg aisle
“which one do you want?”
“what?”
“eggs, which one?” he replies
“uhm, you don't have to, i can ju-”
“i'm not doing this for you,” he replies, cutting you off
you looked at him , not knowing what he meant
‘if he wasn't doing it for me then who the fuck is he buying these eggs for, i don't see anyone else here’
sensing your dumbness he grabbed a carton of the most expensive eggs and made his way to the cashier, pulling you along  
and you don't know why, or what has gotten into you, but all you could do was watch and follow
“here. were even now.” he says, before walking away, leaving you in front of the grocery store, holding a carton of eggs
monday
and now we’re back to the start of the week
which means another week of tutoring
as you waited for changbin to show up at the usual spot, you can’t help but think back to two nights ago
the feeling of his lips against yours all a distant memory yet at the same time, one that you could still remember clearly
“hey,” changbin says, breaking you out of your thoughts
“hi?” you reply, confused as to why he even greeted you in the first place
you guys do the usual, read a couple of flash cards, learn new words blah blah blah and all that boring crap that you learn in a high school English class
at one point you guys find yourself just sat in silence, and you can’t help but ask the question that’s been on your mind since Saturday night
“so who were those guys?”
“doesn’t concern you”
“uhm, the fact that you had your tongue down my mouth says otherwise,”
changbin was shocked, he wasn’t used to people responding to him the way you just did
don’t you know who he is???
he gives you one of his signature smirks, regaining his composure
“you liked my tongue being down your throat,” he says teasingly
o_O
<(。_。)>
excuse me what
is he flirting with you ??
what’s happening ??
“who said I did?” you say mimicking his tone, not allowing yourself to back down of this conversation
after Saturday night you told yourself that you were never going to just watch and follow
if you didn’t want the damn egg, you should’ve said something, you were so disappointed in yourself
you had your own brain, you can make your own decisions
besides you were here to be in control over him, not the other way around
“oh cmon, you’re really gonna try to refute it??” he says, the stupid smirk still evident on his stupid face
god, how you wish you could just smack it off
with your mouth
wait, who said that???
“you enjoyed it just as much as I did,” you say, knowing that if you answer then he would stop
and you were right, he completely shut his mouth and let the silence envelop you once again
“they were kids from another school,”
you look up at him, shocked that he actually answered
“why were they looking for you?”
“I may have keyed their car,” he says chuckling
“Because?”
“Isn’t that enough questions y/n?”
y/n
that was the first time he’s ever said your name
and you weren’t gonna lie, you liked how it sounded
“sorry”
“it’s fine”
“i don’t want to question it but why are you being so nice?”
“you helped me out without questioning me which means you trust me. im just returning the favor.”
“so, what im hearing is , you trust me?”
<( ̄︶ ̄)>
“don’t make me have to say it out loud”
trust
you don’t know how you did it so quickly,
maybe the gods are at your side, but you finally got thE seo changbin to trust you
2  weeks later
you’ve been tutoring changbin just the same
same time
same table
same library
however, so much has changed
mostly the dynamic of your guys’ relationship
it was like he was a totally different person
like I said before, changbin was smart
but in these last couple of days, you realized just how smart he actually was,
he can honestly probably give you a run for your money
and because of this, your past tutoring sessions have ended up with you guys just laughing and joking around
weird, right ?
changbin and laughing ?
who would’ve thought ??
even onlookers were surprised
and everytime changbin laughed at one of your guys’ silly antics, you swear you can hear a pin drop
the whole room just becomes silent
at first, it bothered you how people were just listening in to your conversation, obviously judging the scene
but as the days went by and it seemed that changbin could care less, you started not caring either
and if you were being completely honest, you looked forward to spending time with him
when changbin was with you, it was just you and changbin, nothing else
he somehow manages to make you forget about reality
“lets ditch tutoring sessions today,” he says as soon as he took the seat next to you
“changbin, no”
“c’mon y/n, live a little”
“excuse you! I do have a life!”
“making out with your homework and watching Netflix shows 24/7 is not a life”
“okAy, now you’re just being mean,” you say, pouting at him
“im not being mean, I’m being honest,”
“yeAH and?? no one asked for your honesty,”
changbin laughs at this
lately he found himself laughing more
and for once, he didn’t mind it
you were doing something to him
and he liked it
“cmon, I’m not taking no for an answer,” he says, packing up your things
you sigh in defeat
you know that once changbin sets his mind to something, there's no changing it
so here you are, standing in front of an abandoned music building
“uhhhh, what are we doing here?”
“have you ever trespassed before?” he replies, a smug smile on his face
“nu-uh nope, no way in hell changbin!” you say, your attempt to stop this from happening
however, changbin was already making his way towards the door, completely breaking the lock
aannnndd
he was inside  
“c’mon y/n,” he says reaching out his hand to yours
even though all you need to do is take two steps forward and you're officially a criminal
you were scared shitless
what happens if you get caught omg
almost like he was reading your mind, he quickly says, “y/n, ive been here over a million times and ive never gotten caught,”
“i dont know changbin”
“hm, thats too bad, i wanted to share a secret with you,” he says, a hint of playfulness in his voice before he stepped out of the building and made his way towards his motorcycle
but of course,,,
you being a nosy bitch
“wait,”
“yes?”
“lets go inside”
you guys enter the building, the rooms getting darker and darker the deeper you go (this building is huge okAY)
if you weren't shitting your pants before, you definitely are now 
an abandoned building???
and its dark???
youve seen this in every scary movie out there
it never goes well
“uhm changbin,” you whisper, as you guys continue to walk
“hm”
“i-um can i hold your hand? im scared and - actually you know what its fine its dumb you dont hav-”
but before you can even finish your sentence, his hand were already laced around yours, providing you the comfort and security that you were looking for
you shut your mouth after that, just letting changbin lead the way
passing by so many rooms, each one looking the same as the other, it was starting to feel like a maze
however , changbin seemed to know exactly where to go
‘I guess he has been here over a million times’ you thought to yourself
“were here,” he says, opening the door and letting go of your hands as he reached out for the lights
not gonna lie, you were missing the way his hand felt around yours but thats not the time to think about that
“a music room?” you asked, clearly puzzled
“yeah, you might not know this about me but i can spit barsss,” he says, letting out chuckle
“eyE”
“you dont believe me huh”
“absolutely not”
“ok, watch this”
and with that he entered the recording booth, of course not after he pressed a bunch of buttons
honestly , you have no idea what he’s doing
but as soon as he put the headphones on
*cue any 3racha song because im too indecisive to choose one*
he was,,
indeed,,,
spitting bars
you could not believe your ears
who the fuck is this
you stood there, stunned at the fact the he was rapping about real shit and not something stupid and meaningless (rip wow, she is meaNinGFUL to me okAY)
after he finished rapping, the room was absolute silent
changbin felt dumb, he thought you were gonna praise him but there you were not uttering a single word,
he need you to say something ,anything,, hell, you can even laugh
he’d prefer anything over the silence  
he’s literally the ‘i just showed u my dick pls respond’ meme but its like ‘i showed u my talent pls validate me’
avoiding to make eye contact with you, he walks out of the recording booth
sitting on the couch against the wall, he finally breaks the silence
“so yeah, thats a song my friends and i wrote, its stupid-”
“its not stupid.” you say quickly
“oh?”
“since when where you into this?” you ask, curiosity filling your eyes, taking the seat right next to him
“what do you mean? music?? everyone’s into music y/n” changbin retorts, not wanting to go into detail
“hhhh, you know what i mean changbin,”
changbin doesnt know why
but he wanted to share this side of him with you
maybe because you were the first person that he has ever allowed himself to be close with
or maybe it was because you stuck around him for this long, no one, besides chan and jisung were able to do that
whatever it was, he wants to keep you by his side
he figured that showing you his true self would do just that
so after having a battle with his inner thoughts, he finally says
“my dad was really into this stuff, he taught me everything i know,” changbin beamed
“oh! thats really cool, do you still make music with him?” you say, genuinely interested, youve never really heard about his dad before
“uhmm, hes not really around for me to do that,”
aaaannd,,, thats why,, god reader smh
“oh, im sorry,” you say softly, mentally slapping yourself
“no its okay, you didnt know….he passed away when i was 11”
“what happened?,,,, y-you dont have to tell me if you dont want to,” you quickly added
“I want to,” changbin says, reassuring you
“he just,,, he just died in his sleep, apparently it was a stroke,” sighing, he looked up at the ceiling, trying to hold back his tears
“you must miss him,” you say, your voice still soft
for the first time since youve met changbin, he resembled a piece of glass
so fragile
he was giving you a piece of him, letting you see clearly a part of who he was
and all you wanna do is make sure that you won’t break that piece
“he built this studio...wanted to start his own music company,” he continued as you sat there just listening to him
“my mom hates it though, she stopped funding this place as soon as she can,”
oh
the mention of his mom suddenly brought you back to the deal that you have made 2 weeks ago
and god, you felt guilty
you were here, trying to change him, when nothing should be changed
sure seo changbin had a bad reputation but he is not bad
he’s just protective is all
to be honest, he was one of the kindest, gentlest soul you have met
“i promised myself that i would continue our dream, for him and me, but mostly for him,”
“i-is that why youre failing your classes?” you ask, everything finally piecing together
“huh?”
“you dont care about school because you already know what you want to do...where you want to be”
“hm, you truly are a smart girl y/n,” he says before nodding and flashing you a smile
those words
so similar to the ones his mom has given you
but this time you weren't in the mood to pat yourself in the back
because shit, this is thE dumbest thing you've ever done in your life
after hearing this, you made up your mind, you werent gonna partake in this deal anymore
if you were really as smart as everyone says, you can get into the school you want without any problem
sure it won't be free, but your mom aint working her ass off during her nightly shifts for nothing
and so, right when you go to school tomorrow, you were determined to end it
you’d still tutor changbin, you just won't accept any of the perks that came along with it
“thank you for sharing this with me,” you say genuinely, a smile creeping unto your face
“thank you for caring enough to listen,” changbin replies, his smile getting wider
and then it hits you,
“wait, so you mean to tell me that this is YOUR studio all along??”
and at this changbin lets out the loudest laugh
and you can't help but mirror his actions
1 week later
oof, that time jump, i thought you were gonna end it the next day reader
welp,,
you work hard, but somehow satan, aka the author, works harder
Mrs. Seo had to leave for two weeks, attending board meetings around the country, and whatever principals do,,, i'm too lazy to research what they actually do  
╥﹏╥
and so you spent another week, with seo changbin by your side
one week down, another to go
and when that day comes, you can finally freely hang out with him without all the guilt eating you up
this week you guys even hung out outside of the library
you’ve been with him so much, even your friends have started to notice it
“y/n, are you coming with us to the movies,” felix asks
“oh,, umm sorry guys, i cant,”
“who else are you gonna be with? i thought we were your only friends,” minho pointed out, a pout on his face  
“with changbin of course,” hyunjin hissed, obviously upset that you have been pushing them to the side  
“ i can hang out with anyone that i want,” you argued, really not having any of his attitude 
“ you shouldnt hang out with people like him,” hyunjin retorted
you scoffed, “what’s that supposed to mean?”
“i mean blink once if youre being held captive” hyunjin joked, as the rest of the table snickered
however, you didn't find it funny,
who were they to talk about changbin like that??
they didnt even know him
and so you stood up, leaving all your friends calling out for you
-------------
walking to the table, you flopped down on your chair, slamming your backpack on the floor
“what's got you in such a bad mood?” changbin asks
“nothing,” you huffed, getting your materials out of your backpack
you didn't want to tell changbin that your best friends think hes the devil himself and didn't want you around him
meanwhile , changbin was annoyed
it seems like he's shared so much with you since the music room yet he still barely knows anything about you
he wondered that maybe you didn't want to be in his life the way he wanted to be in yours
but fuck it, he’s just gonna spend the time he has with you enjoying it rather than filling his mind with negative thoughts
but damn, you're frown was really bothering him
“y/n,” he says, calling out to you
no response
“y/n,” he continues, poking you on the elbow
still no response
“y/n”
You sigh, looking up at him, an emotionless expression on your face, you responded with a strong, “what.”
*insert changbin doing aegyo*
and with that , you lost it
you were an absolute madman
you never expected that the one and only seo changbin
notorious badboy
would ever do aegyo
all because you had a stupid frown on yourself
you laughed so loud
changbin doing the same as soon as your melodic laugh hit his ears
which resulted to you guys being kicked out of the library
-------------
“ i cant believe you got me kicked out of my favorite place,” you say, seated in a booth inside the ice cream parlor near your guys’ school
another one of changbins ideas
“ hey its not my fault you laugh like a hyena!” he says smiling before you threw a curled up paper tissue at his face
a couple of seconds later, after your laughter has died down
“ so, you want to tell me now why you were in such a sour mood?”
you knew that if you werent gonna tell him now that would still end up finding out about it from someone else
and so you came clean
“ its just my friends,,,, they dont think youre a good influence, wants me to stop hanging out with you” you say
“ oh,”
“ but dont worry!, i didnt listen to them, i actually told them off,” you confessed
“ why didnt you listen to them? theyve been your friends longer than youve known me?” he asks
“ because they dont know you” you reply, “and im sure if they did, they would also be friends with you”
as much as he appreciated the way you stood up for him, he didnt want you going through all that trouble 
‘god, what did he even do to deserve an angel like you,’ changbin thinks to himself 
“ don't tell them off next time,” he grunted
“ wh-what?”
“ everything they say about me is true”
“ changbin, no its not”
“ honestly y/n it doesnt bother me so dont let it bother you”
“ why doesnt it bother you?” you ask, wanting to know the reason
“ because its high school. after this, literally no one would care anymore. and then real life starts, people move on and worry about bigger things, things that actually matter more than the status quo. let them say what they say.”
and just like every other time, changbin has left you stunned
the arrival of Ms. Seo - tuesday 
a week has passed since the ice cream parlor
and Ms. Seo was back in town
this was it
the day you finally put a halt to it
and you were beyond ready
you haven't seen changbin all day
you figured that since his mom was back then he was also back to avoiding the school like it was a plague
you entered Ms. Seos room, determined
“Ms. Seo -”
She puts a hand up to her lips, signaling you to be quiet
‘bitch omygod i literally cant keep doing this any longer,’
‘its already been over a month’
so you ignored her warning
“im not doing this deal anymore. I’ll still tutor changbin but I won’t change him,,,, and you can keep your stupid money,” you let out, releasing all the bottled up emotions
“is that all,”she replies
“yes”
“then you may leave”
what???
it was that easy????
you thought she was gonna stop you, force you to hold your end of the bargain
if you knew it would’ve been this easy then you wouldn’t have worried over it so much
but you don’t know a lot of things
and you certainly didnt know that changbin was on the other line
later that day
you’re seated in the library
usual place, usual time, waiting for the one and only seo changbin, yet he never showed
you didn’t think much of it
‘maybe he just forgot’ you tell yourself
the next day - wednesday
here you were again, waiting for him
still nothing
you try and think of reasons why he wouldn’t show up two days in a row and can really only think of one - maybe his mom told him that he didn’t need tutoring anymore?
but surely, he would tell you
right ???
sure you guys started off on the wrong foot but you were friends now
at least you thought so
you decided to just give him the benefit of the doubt
‘maybe he’s just busy’
2 days later - friday
you’ve tried everything you can do to get a hold of changbin
all your calls went straight to voicemail
texts were left on delivered
you didn’t even see him around school anymore
it was like your worlds never collided and he was never a part of yours
you were starting to get worried, what if he got himself into trouble
“look who decided to show her face,” hyunjin comments as you took the seat next to him
ever since the day you guys had your argument, you have never been able to talk to him about it
“im not in the mood,” you reply,
hyunjin sensing that you were exhausted,
“hey,” he says softly, “what’s wrong?”
“nothing”
“y/n please, we’ve been friends for over 3 years, you don’t need to lie to me”
“aren’t you mad at me?”
“no. im upset that you’ve been pushing us to the side for your little boy toy but im not mad,” he says giving you a soft smile
hhhhh, it was times like these you remember why he was your best friend
hyunjin was just so thoughtful, so caring
you return the smile he gave you as you pulled him in for a tight hug
“I’m sorry hyunjin”
“it’s okay, im sorry too, now tell me what’s wrong?”
“it’s just changbin-“
“I swear to god, if he even laid a finger on you he’s a dead man”
“no!” you say quickly putting an end to his assumption
“so what happened?” he asks, eyebrows going up in sheer curiosity
and then you told him
you told him about the deal with Ms. seo
about how your relationship with changbin changed along the way
how you ended the deal
and now we’re back to changbin and ignoring you
“damn, well have you tried actually going to him?”
“i wouldnt even know where -”
and then it hits you
the abandoned music building
“hyunjin, youre a genius!!!,” you say excitedly
“thanks, we been knew”
“ i have to go ill explain later, bye!!” you say, dashing out of there as fast as you could and made your way to the abandoned building
taking the bus there gave you time to reflect on everything that has happened this past couple month
how much your life has changed since changbin entered it
he pushed you to take risks, to live out of your comfort zone, to not care about other people’s opinions
he made you feel free
and most importantly, he made you happy
the good girl has fallen for the bad boy, i told yall this was gonna be cliche right?
continuing on
just as you  expected, the door was open
the dark didnt even bother you anymore, the only thing in your mind was changbin
oh,, where could he be??
could you ever find your way into this maze of a building and retrace the steps that he took when he was by your side?
as you got deeper and deeper into the building, you feel yourself start to get lost
‘fuck i already saw this door’
‘omg y/n did you really just walk in a circle’
and then you hear it
music, singing
your nightingale
you walk faster, desperate to get to the voice
and here you are now, face to face with the one and only, seo changbin
he stops singing as soon as he saw you walk in
“hey,” you whisper out yet he continued to just stand there, not uttering a single word
“your voice is really pretty, i didnt know you could sing!-”
“what do you want?” his voice, dark and firm just like the day you first met him
This caught you off guard
Did you do something wrong?
“Did i do something wrong?” you say, not aware that you have said your thoughts out loud
changbin chuckles but it was so uninviting, like he was taunting you
“ please, drop the act”
?????
“what?” you reply, completely confused
“ you dont like me ”
“ changbin, what?”
“ you're just like everyone else”
“ changbin i really dont understand pl-”
“ i shouldn't have trusted you.”
“ what?!??, no changbin, you can trust me! just tell me whats wrong!”
all the while, you guys were still talking with a glass between the two of you
ironic, since you felt like a wall has been planted around changbin and you cant reach him  
“ you think i should change”
“ no”
“ what do you mean no? I heard you y/n! I heard what you told my mom, i heard about the stupid deal, the stupid money!”
(⊙…⊙,)
“ changbin, let me explain”
“ i know im known as the bad boy y/n, but you… youre even worse than me”
“ changbin.”
“ youre a monster”
and with hearing those words, the tears that you have been so desperately trying to keep just bursted out like a waterfall
changbin too, has let out his tears
and all we got now are two broken people who can clearly see each other yet are still on opposite sides of the glass
“ you're just like everyone out there that you have resented, you judged me by other people’s words, i thought- i thought that i can finally found someone i could open up to but you never even gave me chance from the beginning”
you let him talk without interrupting him
you deserved the ache you were feeling in your heart
everything he said was true
and with that he breaks down, straight to the floor, back against the wall, hugging his knees
and all you could do was watch, until you couldn't take it anymore
you finally entered the recording booth , taking a seat on the floor right next to him, mimicking his broken figure
“im sorry”
silence
you looked up at the ceiling as you sighed
he deserves an explanation
“ yes, i took the deal, but that's because i thought i needed it changbin. I may be smart, but financially my family isn't doing well. my mom already works extra shifts but it still won't be enough. my dad isnt even in the picture, i dont know where the hell he is”
and with this, changbins head slowly perks up, looking at you with his glass-like eyes, as you continued to stare at the ceiling
you were finally opening up to him
just like how he has been doing
“ i took the deal because, you’re right, i judged you, i was stupid and i never expected us to actually be friends, clearly i was wrong. you have taught me so much. you have pushed me into doing things i never thought i could do. you made me see the world in a different way.”
he’s still just listening to you when you finally took your eyes away from the ceiling and faced him
“ i understand if you dont want to see me anymore but i cant leave you knowing that i never got to say this,” you continue, afraid of the results that were about to come
“ what else are you hiding from me?” he says, but this time, he says it softly, the furious changbin that you have encountered just minutes ago was completely gone
“ i think im in love with you,” you say, quickly looking down, embarrassed at your confession
“ y/n look at me,”
“ i dont want to”
“ why?”
“ i know you're gonna break my heart”
“ you broke mine first,” and with that he lifted your chin up, making you look him straight into his eyes before kissing you
this kiss was different from your first one
it was slow but passionate, filled with all of the unsaid words between the two of you
your guys lips both slightly chapped from all the crying
yet his lips still felt like the softest pair against yours
pulling away, changbin leans his forehead against yours, his eyes closed
yours were open though, taking the sight all in before you pulled away, wiping away his left over tears
“ god, were a mess,” he finally says out loud, before he pulled you in a tight hug 
“ im sorry,” you say again
“ i’ll forgive you if you promise to continue tutoring me?”
“ what ?”
“ continue the deal, get the money”
“ changbin, i really don't want to do that”
“ i know you dont. but we have to finesse my mom somehow,” he says, bursting into a smile, clearly joking
..
“eYE,,, i cannot believe you right now! You can't be serious!”
“ but i am. go back into her office tell her you’ll continue it and get the money for your education.”
“changbin! stop joking! I already feel bad about it!”
“Okay fine i just like it when you tutor me okay, its kinda sexy” he says
playfully slapping him, you guys laugh, the tension in the air finally gone
“ you know if you didnt buy me those eggs, we wouldnt be here by now,” you say, a small smile on your face
“ hmm, and why?”
“ because those eggs were the first time i realized that the most notorious bad boy, the one and only Seo Changbin, can also be soft,”
“ do not use my name and soft in the same sentence ever again,”
“ what are you gonna do about it?” you reply, taunting him
and so
he pulled you into another kiss
and another
and another
until a series of laughter coming from the both of you interrupted it
“im glad i bought you those eggs”
hhhhhhh this ending is so rushed and so bad i just didnt wanna leave it unfinished 
ALSO IM SEEING STRAY KIDS BITCHES!!!!!,,,,,, MY SEAT HELLA FAR BUTS ITS OKAY BECAUSE ILL STILL BE THERE ╭(′▽`)╭(′▽`)╯
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