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#this is a joke and i know im being mean im so sorry
jwsverse · 2 days
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𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 timestamp 03:09
pairing ⁝ jake x f!reader
synopsis ⁝ in which jake tells the boys all about his crush on you, and he's way too downbad
genre ⁝ fluff!!! , reader is implied to be "cold", jake is in luv and the boys are real goofs, oh reader os also said to have bunny teeth (sawry if you guys dh it cause i do so im sorry for being self indulgent 😥)
word count ⁝ 0.8k
author's note ⁝ ummmm idk what this is but i wanted to make tbis like black cat x golden retriever typa shii... kinda wanna write a long fic for this icl!' also fhis is NAWTTT proofread
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“you like who?!”
jake stumbles back a bit at the loudness of jake's voice. he chuckles awkwardly, glancing around at the boys who are now gathered around him. even heeseung, who was about to make his leave for his next class, turns around with wide eyes.
“uh, i like y/n?” jake scratches the back of his neck shyly, flushing under the eyes of his friends as well as from his confession, “what's wrong?”
jay jumps from his seat, leaning across with his palms flat om the table as he hurriedly says, “but why? i mean like how? what about y/n? why her?”
jake is a little confused, and it's clear, so sunoo quickly clarifies, “there's nothing wrong with y/n! she's our friend and we love her!” then a pause, and his face scrunches up as he hesitates, “but it's just... you know, y/n. she's not the most cheerful nor is she the friendliest! and you've known her the shortest among us! so you know, we're just shocked.” sunoo ends his ramble with a stiff tilt of his head as he leans back into his seat.
“oh,” jake utters out quietly, flushing red, “but y/n's great. she's not very cheerful or friendly. but she cares a lot! especially for you guys!” he defends.
he doesn't quite understand what the guys are trying to say here. he knows that amongst all of them, he's known you the shortest, considering he joined the friend group late after transferring here. but, feelings don't need explanation, right? there's no reason for liking someone, it's a ‘just because’ kind of thing.
“and she's super pretty! especially when she smiles and laughs, which i know is rare, but she only ever does it around you guys, you know? she hates it but, when her bunny teeth shows it's the cutest thing and i think that makes her so unique. and she may seem cold, but i think she really cares for you guys! like whenever we go to parties, she doesn't drink cause she know you guys would get drunk, so someone has to take care of you guys.” jake rambles. he takes a deep breath, only then noticing the boys' wide eyes all staring at him.
“what?”
sunghoon, who has been silent all this while, shakes his head, gesturing for jake to go on.
“y/n's... well she doesn't show it. but she's actually really sensitive. every time you guys tease her, she may flick you off but deep down, she does get hurt! i mean you can just tell by the way her eyes shift downwards and she goes quiet for awhile.” jake frowns at a fresh memory from just last week when the boys joked about you rejecting a boy who confessed to you too coldly, and you had looked hurt for a second, before masking it up into annoyance.
“she hates it when people see her blush, but when she does, her cheeks don't turn pink, her neck does. and she always tucks her hair back when she's nervous and she'll never make eye contact with you! she's always the happiest when she's with us, and you'll miss her subtle smile if you don't pay attention. her eyes always go brighter and her way of showing care and love is by rolling her eyes and being childish.”
“i like y/n. i really do, i know i've known her the shortest and there are still many things i need to know and understand about her, but i just want you guys to know i'm really sincere about her.”
jake has to take a deep breath once he's finished. his face is red, and his mouth is dry from all the rambling. even so, he wants to go on, and he intends to, until heeseung cuts in, with his palm in his face, stopping him.
“okay that's enough. we get it jake, we trust you.” heeseung utters out with a smirk, finding the flush on his friend's cheeks awfully funny and cute. “we know you're a good guy and we think you'll be good for y/n! let's just take this slowly, okay? let's discuss after class.”
heeseung grabs his bag and heads for the door, turning back to jake as he winks, “don't worry, we won't tell y/n.” he twists the door knob and immediately halts.
right behind the door, stands you with wide eyes in shock and your hand about to knock. the heat is evident in your neck as you glance from heeseung to jake then you look away immediately.
“i...” your throat dries up as you snap out of it and tuck your hair behind your ear in a hurry, “i just wanted to grab my book.” then without looking at any of them, you cover up the side of your neck, sneak pass heeseung to grab your belongings and you run out of the room.
sunoo chuckles awkwardly, “well... at least you got her behavior on point.”
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© jwsverse
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aru-art · 1 year
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two-headed calf by laura gilpin
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kagoutiss · 10 days
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green beetle black beetle
#star wars#the original trilogy#boba fett#darth vader#hi. sorry for star war jumpscare. genuinely#i feel like ive kinda been on an art hiatus lately due to health stuff#i got diagnosed with a parathyroid disease recently (wahoo) so now i know why i have been feeling so bad! need more tests though#anyway. in the mean time most of the entertainment my brain can handle has been like. youtube clip compilations of shows and movies#not even the actual shows or movies. literally just sections of them on youtube#i wish i was joking#the only reason i know what happens in succession is because i have watched it in disjointed order in youtube compilations. not joking#anyway so ive learned a lot more about star wars than i ever. thought i would#mostly just the original trilogy and prequels. some of the old comics & books are interesting too#(sick to my stomach) i like darth vader he has like the same personality as ganondorf except he had no good reason for doing anything#when vader/anakin does literally anything weird or unacceptable it like. makes me laugh so hard its like jerma when he sees a car accident#boba fett’s costume design has been rotating in my head a lot too it’s very good#he’s very colorful and like. matte/unpolished compared to vader and it makes them a cool duo visually#those 2 are my favorites. vader why is the space cowboy the only person aside from sidious or tarkin who is allowed to get mad at you#sidious is my 3rd favorite. he sucks so bad as like a person that you just. you have no expectations of him except just being evil#so its just really funny like everything he does is horrible and he’s so happy all the time like good for him#i’m making it sound like ive never seen star wars before. i have i just never really cared about it until i got an endocrine disorder lmao#but yeah idk art may continue to be slow while im figuring out treatment stuff#if anyone reading this also has or has had hyperparathyroidism im wishing the strength & radiance of 1000 beautiful horses upon you
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moeblob · 2 months
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Moeblob: (tries to establish a fish theme. likes to be called salmon.) FEH: Broccoli alts only, no negotiations.
(this is for you Leo.... I'm sorry........... you don't deserve it)
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rexscanonwife · 11 days
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Happy Mexican heritage day, by the way! Thanks to my whitewashed-ass mom I didn't grow up with that much of the culture, but I'm proud to be a part of it nonetheless!! 💖🇲🇽💖🇲🇽💖🇲🇽💖🇲🇽💖🇲🇽💖
To celebrate I'm gonna imagine showing my f/os things from Mexican culture where applicable > u <
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erisolkat · 2 months
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god i hate everyone
#who thought it would be cute to immediately start ribbing me about how hairy and bald and ugly im gonna be when i go on t#one. im taking minoxidil. two. i wanna be hairy. and three. im not transitioning to attract you guys im transitioning to attract other trans#people! other trans guys find it hot come on!#like ok so dads brother is out here rn right#so first mom tells me hes gonna ask me questions about being trans. ok fine.#second she starts going on about how i had to be emotionally vulnerable with like 3 different therapists for this. whatever.#then when i start participating in the conversation she immediately asks “so how are you feeling about losing all your hair”#THEN she has the audacity to say to my uncle “yeah its sort of a gamble hes either gonna end up hairy like the italian side or fairly#baby smooth like yall“ when she fucking KNOWS that im dysphoric about my lack of body hair#and this happens every time! and its out of nowhere constantly!#all the while the cis men in the room are fucking bullying me with all this toxic masculinity bullshit!#sometimes i just wish i had never come out is all im saying#kept this a secret until i became an adult yknow. yeah i would have to do everything myself but it wouldn't be like this#just because i told you that you could call me a fag doesnt mean youre suddenly allowed to do microagressions constantly#shes tickled to fucking death with calling my future bottom growth my “teenie weenie” what the fuck! what the fuck!!!#and meanwhile every time i try to say words or make a joke my dad and grandpa jump on the fucking opportunity to correct me! or cut me off!#sorry im fucking exhausted i barely slept at all the night before last and got i think maybe 7 hours of sleep at most last night#and i just got out of therapy which always wears me out
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pretty-little-martyr · 9 months
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always a little unsettling to be lsitening to a reddit story about someone who's being kind of a piece of shit and then partway through the OP is like "i found out theyre bipolar" and suddenly all the comments are like "typical, of course theyre crazy, only bipolars do [x thing that pretty much any human is capable of doing]"
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bunnihearted · 3 months
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🏹
#i hope no one reads this bc my avpd is crazy rn and i cant be affectionate#BUT...#i know there are some good ppl in the world#many ppl on tumblr (and twitter) has been very kind to me#i know not everyone are bad ppl#im just stuck in this bpd mood where only ONE thing is true#and i constantly feel so hurt and trampled on and disrespected#and i feel like i cannot trust anyone#so my brain hones in on that i feel unsafe w everyone#but okkkk listen i know i know some ppl are very nice to me#and i appreciate that more than i can ever have words for#so.. like yeah i've gotten some asks but i cant reply bc i cant be social directly#but no i dont hate everyone on here or think every single person is awful#like when ppl are nice to me no i dont think theyre horrible#but with my trauma brain... and my past experiences#i get very sensitive sometimes and i feel like everyobe are lying to me and making fun of me#and everyone is in on a joke abt me that im unaware of#and i feel like if i lay myself bare i'll only be taken advantage of and humiliated#i just feel right now very weak and like all my skin's off#and im walking around like a huge wound and if someone even breathes on me it hurts so much#so im sorry for being mean and saying so many rude things rn im just kinda falling apart#but i still have capacity to recognize that ppl are nice to me on here ok i just dont know what ro#what to do with it*** bc im not used to that#im used to ppl bullying me or being mean and i hate that but i just cry and hurt myself and i know what to do#when someone's nice to me i feel like the world is upside down and the sky is like green and the water is red i dont get it#anyway.. yeah i hope no one reads this and when i ramble and write a lot the chance of less ppl reading gets higher#anyway... i just wanted to write this and get it out into the universe#bc i sometimes do things to isolate myself even further bc i've never had community or support or comfort or friendships so lowkey i dont#even want to nurture things that can lead to that bc idk what to do with that. how to not fuck it up.#anyway... idk what im saying or thinking even
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hanzajesthanza · 1 year
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me whenever the short story "something ends, something begins" is mentioned, or not even mentioned, but i have an opportunity to mention it myself
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boxwinebaddie · 5 days
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NINAAAAAAAAAAAA? DO YOU HAVE ANY MORE KYLEYB CONTENT? I LOVE HIM
nOOOOOOOOOOOONICA!
-- and do i EVA, dollface!
( edit: the spelling across the board is non-existent. so sorry. you are morally obligated to be nice to me; i have a tumor. also, my apologies for yesterdays post -- it is gone now *shudders at memory* --
i was very manic and upset and the jerseykyle in me that gets angry, really, really is convinced she can kill god...i do think that's still true, but it was very chaotic and embarassing to be like that on the dash.
but if you are worried about the tumor i am trying to have a ( bad ) sense of humor about, again, it’s benign, noncancerous, very, very small, to the point where it requires no surgery or radiation treatment at this time ( i do have a radiology appointment for another brain scan on the 26th so please keep me in ur thots if you can ) and i just have to cope with a lot of gnarly side effects.
i love you and hope you heal. <333 -the u.n.
so...i wrote this weird ~'thing'~ ( i'm not sure what else to call it ) because i was having a very loose and silly-goosed ( but as always, wonderfully and graciously soul-warming ) converslaytion in the dms
with dearest, darlingest teria ( whose work you should not only read and whose art is not only more immaculate than the piss-and-moan-a-lisa, but whose advice, council and conversation i enthusiastically urge you to enlist because she is truly, a little bit of heaven on earth )
and, i don't know, i was doing the silly kyley b voice for shits and giggles in my texts and...it never...left my brain ( is THAT what gave me the brain worms? ) and i had to write my weird ~'thing'~, which is my boy, THE BUOY, kyley bi-atch! talkin’ to the new kid and givin’ them some street-wise, beat-the-shit-out-of-you-poetic advice.
( if you want it...it's down at the VERY BOTTOM -- everyone say hoooola cuervostan ;) xxx -- of this post...i got weirdly passionate talking about kyley b and jersey in general, so you can read all of that if you WANT...but i'll leave the screenshots after everything, so you can scroll down easily and reach it; also...gender neutral, i promise, just girl-scout-squirrely-whirly nicknames, haha. )
cue a future me leaving this here where i left off:
*unfreezes tv screen and a feral past nina springs to life*
also, i am...so sorry in advance for this, bc, okay, look...
-- does he sound like ball bustin', good fa' nothing pauly d, soprano mobstaH? yeah...yeah he sure does, aND WHATTABOUTIT, BETCH?! ( i'm just kidding, you guys; mwah ) but like...is that not The Vibe?
like? he is not supposed to give your rough and tumble ol buddy nino down at the jewish-italian pizzeria who looks like he would rather fkn blow his brains out that take 'ya ordah' ( but loves his ma and his kid brother, and the counter guy got fkn shived, so there he is baby baby;
-- the worst man on planet earth...
…and The LUVH Of My Loife! )
...who repeatedly calls you 'toots', but he's not really hitting on you, he's just trying to size you up ( also, i love you pre-(ed)isordah jersey, the BIGGEST and the baddiest, baby! ah-baddabingbaddaBOOM! )
and he...( quite literally ) wants you to stay the fuck away from him and get the hell out of his shitty city, and, he is THE KYLEY B, BAY-BEE! he's the curliest, cuntiest, coppa'-ist ( do naaaught, howeva, group him in with the bootlickers, or he'll make you lick his...just so HE can call /YOU/ one...like...he is my BF, do you understA-- )
hooOOoo
( i am sorry; he is...my favorite mwob-buoy-bawhss xx )
but...on the inside, underneath it all, really is...just...a fine and truly beautiful specimen, the meaner he is to you, the more you like him...and...you accidentally fall in love with him ( oooY geVAULT! )
that is...in fact, what sweet, sweet stanley marsh did ( he is a genius and a visionary and I RESPECT THE FUCK OUT OF THAT SCARY BOY CRAZY CRUNCHY KALE SALAD KIIIIIIING; like, he really played The Long Game...AND WON!!! HE FUCKING WON, BABEY!!!! like
i have this pre-rm, childhood headcannon, that ( because he was trying not to say stan's name or acknowledge him -- very interesting to me because that is the Same strategy stan employed when he publicly gave kyle the jersey nickname, bc he knew he could not remain detached/unemotional if he said kyle's name --
that babyjk when he lived in south park regularly just called stan 'bambi' or 'sug' or 'masug'; short for 'masugganah' or crazy in yiddish
because rm!santanastan...
( which is what sharon called him, for the band and just to respect his chosen name, in spanish, without alerting randy's suspicions...i will start crying, i should talk abt the south park era of the rm fbs more )
was just this insane boy with gigantic fucking goldfish, cartoon dear eyes who would approach him when no one else would even DARE, was freshly obsessed with him and thought he was the bees knees.
so, because the reader, reminds him a lot of stan...he starts using those little nicknames and i wanted you to know the rm!origin. yes, he does still call stan 'bamb' and 'sug' ( which is cute, because as a nice pet name he likens it to 'sugar' sometimes, aw ) to this day
and i think, almost did it or actually one time with raven of crimson dawn and stan's gigantic fucking sugar glider eyeballs lit up and kyle was HORRIFIED because oh my god, that was a Stanley Marsh ONLY nickname and i used it on this fucking CELEBRITY MAN...like y'know actually bestie, you are a fucking genius…
— that's Your celebrity man.
BUT BACK TO BACK TO KYLEY B, BAAAAAAAAABEY!
who is the red-(H)ead-BIC of NUEW JOISEY, kid!
like my best description is that he's this fast-twalkin, street rat, night life, mortal ( but not really; he basically thinks he's god ) kombative, fucking feral, ruthless palooka-pummeling, curbstomping, pavement leveling, street-fighting piesa' literal gutta trash, or sort of like if luffy from one piece was a mad swole ( emphasis mad, he's pissed and humungous, holy shit ) scary freckled ginger new jersey pirate king
who ( bc i love a visual ) is typically out there, rocking:
a way too tight ( to the point of it almost being threadbare and rolling paper thin; he looks good tho; he's my lil diamond in da ruff ) worn out, extremely stretched out, skin-tight, faded/distressed
( that's fraying and unspooling in several along the mom-mended and barely held-together seams --sounds like a metaphor for something -- with the distracting curly font almost nearly peeled and cracked off ), probably heavily stained ( with blood...and whatever meager, worm-infested brain matta splattered on his shirt when he was bashing some bigshot's stupid head in with a tire iron -- rip; sorry ma -- sunbleached from scorching nj summers that it's almost...brown ) black affliction tank top
some huge, torn-up, baggy, aggresively rhinestone-studded, heavily sequined ( k.b, it's already so hard to see and street hardened, police siren, rough around the edges radiance is already blinding me, please have mercy [ never not once ] ) mike 'the situation' influenced, super quintessentially 2012 jersey shore adjacent ( in that they're very loud, vibrant, in your face, tacky and obnoxious ) faux americana, tattoo parlor-popularized, badly screenprinted, ed hardy jeans ( eyeconick! )
the M-o-s-t ( sigh ) hideous ( and i do mean fucking hideous, sheila broflovski is fashion blind; but she is so beautiful and kind, she is forgiven in every way ) men's size thirteen ( jersey has frighteningly large, monster-sized clown feet ) highlighter green-orange-purple basketball shoes you've ever seen
-- purchased, with love, from the sale rack of ross for dress for less ( where they were collecting dust; no one wanted those things ) and her widely amassment of store credit from...numerous previous returns ) by none other than, my favorite beehive-styling, cherry-red, new jersey hauswife, legendary broflovski matriarch ( she rlly runs that whole fkn house like the navy; choke gerald )
Miss Sheila Broflovski...
the only person who is not scared of the notorious k.m.b. kyley b and routinely, while they're out in public, ft. a baby-faced, mean-mugging kyley b jersey acting all big and bad, will pull him down by the tag of his tank top, go 'you've got some schmutz on your face, bubbula!'
hold down this gigantic, vicious, snarling, menacing, thick as brick, hard as titanium, six foot tall, juvenile detention center frequenting, frightening concrete wall of an eighteen year old boy who looks like he could gut you with his stare alone, like he's a cute, cuddly teddy bear, hawk the loudest, wettest, gnarliest lougie into a schmatta she fished out of her purse and proceed to volently scrub a tiny spot of 'sahwasce' her son's face while he squirms like a feral cat; i love her. )
and the crowning jewels ( or jewels really; not sure if they're real, but they're big and shiny, which is what matters ) duel-ery, which i call that because…
he literally weaves his way through the back-door inner-city system of crime in new jersey through info he mercilessly squeezed out of a coupla peabrained Gabbagoons, uses what little information he could decipher out of those fkn weasel's pathetic wheezes to deadpool square to wherever their bosses lair is…
makes them regret they were even born, beats them with in AN INCH of their sorry life, leaves them lying in a pool of their own gross blood, stamps a big, blingy 'B' on their forehead and browses the shattered, blood-soaked display case and five-finger discounts ( but really, if you just won a major battle or boss fight; clearly, you deserve kind of reward or compensation, right, guys? and by his logic...you're not rlly stealing what quite morally wrong, but rightfully...belongs to you )
...whatever the largest and most impressive ( or not, tbh, sometimes he's like 'ugh, really...a toe ring? that's your big come up?' ) piece of jewelry they're wearing is, sterlizes it, and flexes it it on his body and on the streets as a silent, but deadly warning to all other 'so-called' king pens and 'unstoppable' underground crime lords that
'oh, that guy YOU were scared of? i beat the piss outta him, he cried like a fucking baby, he bled like a stuck pig and is lying in the fucking sewer like a half-dead rat. and if you fuck with me; you'll be next ) and scare legit 60 y/o robert deniro level frightening men, who have been running the game since the crimson dawn of time…
-- Into SUBMISSION.
...at like...seventeen or eighteen years old.
LIKE HE IS A FUCKING LEGEND IN NEW JERSEY. they still whisper about him TO THIS DAY and have to look over their shoulders before they do...like he was that fucking Terrifying when he was out there.
and i need you to know that he is H-U-G-E. like the incredible hulk HUGE. he's not like, this scrawny, gangly, sniveling little ginger vanilla wafer cookie rolling up on you...he is like, this six foot two, gigantic size thirteen shoe wearing, slim-jim-ripping, gum and fist snacking,
NFL FOOTBALL FIELD PLAYER WIDE, like not just some measly, tiny-itsy bitsy football player -- oh, no; you wish -- he is STACKED AND JACKED, he is ten times wider than the widest receiver...he is the WHOLE DAMN FOOTBALL FIELD BITCH, fkn might-o-chrondia ( because he is the new jersey powerhouse of the concrete and hard titanium juvenille deliquient cell, which shakes when he walks, bro. )
tldr; KYLEY B IS FRECKLY, JEWISH, GINGER, NEW JERYSIAN 'THE THING' FROM THE FANTASTIC FOUR, COULD VERY EASILY BODY YOU, OR VIOLENTLY DISMEMBER AND KILL YOU AND MAKE THAT SHIT LOOK LIKE L-I-G-H-T WORK. AND I MEAN THAT.
but...he actually, believe it or not, does NOT...Kill People?
which, i honestly want to say, is stanley marsh's gentle 'post-mortem' pacifist influence still lingering around him like the sweetest ghost.
because, honestly, i think a lot of those people deserve to fucking die, not just for being extremely fucking cruel to jerseykyle for literally just existing, for how he looks of all things, his fucking APPERANCE!
( it's the teacher in me, but child and adolescent bullying, particularly in school settings, really makes me viciously angry and very, Very fucking sad because it causes soooo much psychological damage to the victim, who most likely did nothing to warrant such incessant and merciless taunting -- that was probably perpetrated because he was whip-smart, and therefore a fucking nerd, significantly larger than other boys, wore glasses, has a 'funny', loud, cartoonish voice...
( which is simply...a dialect and manner of speaking that he literally developed from growing up in new jersey and from his mother teaching him how to talk -- that shouldn't at all diminish the weigh his words carry or the meaning behind them; which, minus...a little...or a lot, of potty-mouthed sailor swearing -- which, again, only fucking happened because he was so viciously bullied, he had to adopt a harsh, slangy, malicious vernacular -- is often extremely profound, academic and reflects a very introspective perspective )
and because he's immunocompromised, had to report to the nurse's office frequently throughout the day to prick his finger and check his blood pressure for his diabetes and is often, very, very sick -- which i guess makes other kids view him as weak, but most damningly was that...he didn't fit into the mold ( or, uh, most traditional size ranges, sheila only bought him clothes from the 'big and tall' men's section of most department stores because he was so Large in stature,
like he could not squeeze into child-sized...anything; meanwhile ravenstan has itsy, bitsy baby feet and could probably slide his non-existent ass -- you are so sexy king, i love you, you needed a flaw -- into a pair of the largest sized black pair of skinny jeans they got on the racks of the junior girls section of target...like, he could and he would look damn Good too! like go AWHFF king!
HES SOOO BAD! i need to focus, but before i do~
btw; rs definitely sent jk a picture to laff. he was like damn, i am sorry it won't load; will you send five more from different angles? HELP )
but, anyways, my lifetime horny writer girl max security prison sentence aside ( and pending ), he just wasn't traditionally thin or tiny or conventionally attractive or healthy like most other boys or children and general were..so the other kids, probably ring-leaded by the most convention of the bunch, othered him, dedicated making every single day of his life miserable and made his life a living hell...
...just to have a little 'fun' at recess and laugh.
FUCK. THAT.
because, i don't know, bullying like that, creates what are usually painful lifelong feelings of self-inferiority, very difficult to remedialize through therapy and selfcare, social emotional issues with expressing yourself/emotions in healthy positive ways, militant self-isolation
and ALL of that happened to jerseykyle...and on top of just never hearing 'i love you' from his father, that hate he received from the outside world, forced him the keep everything inside and it's why he couldn't tell ravenstan he loved him, because basketball is just a game,
...but it never FUCKING ended and he could only alternate between being defensive or offensive, there was never a bell that sounded to tell him he could stop playing and that it was over, and return to 'normal', that was his normal, because, from all his overwhelming negative experiences with vulnerability, if he stopped treading water, every shark on planet earth would smell his blood in the water...
and spill it everywhere. :(
NINA, DID YOU HAVE A POINT? AND WERE YOU EVER GONNA GET THERE? i...think so? i think the point is that, these are bad people that kyley kg fucking b was putting the hurt on...and the point is that, because, like i said, he considers himself a 'debt collector' and appears villainous bc of his vicious disposition,
is really more like...
a misunderstood antihero than anything?
he's kind of like a red robin hoodie, if you will, because he goes after rapists, child molesters, guys who hurt women/animals/the weak, power-hungry bastards in suits who use that power for evil and take it out on those who are stricken with poverty, like, he is a violent criminal...but he takes out even More violent criminals.
hot boy shit!
and yeah, he does do it sort of vaingloriously sometimes, for street cred, to wear people's status symbols on his hand and placate that hurt place in himself by being scary and ferocious and making motherfuckers pay for what they did for him and how they treated him...and with all that blood in his eyes, he gets blind to the ethical portion of what he's doing...but, subconsciously...
he's doing it...
— For GOOD.
and killing people, the notion of it, not only made stanley marsh, punk rock pacifist prince, violently, violently sick, but it's also, one, too messy, a lot on his hands ( already quite heavy with his heisted and thieved jewels and video game loot ) but...i don't know? he really loves his mom, you know? batshit insane as that woman is, he loves her to death...and does spare bad-guys because of it. because everyone has a mom and not everyone's mom is kind and lovely like his, but they could...and he's sending their kid back home to them...
...in a [ BOX ].
it just...it didn't sit right with him ( he acts unbothered by the idea of murdering people...but, unless he had to, like if it was going to kill someone else and the only way to fix it would be to kill the thing about to kill them, he could do it, and again...he could do it easily. )
he also acts simultaneously above the 'laur' and studies it in school, but ultimately...what happens to this fuck-ups after he fucks them up...is not up to him. whether they live or die, that is. he gave them what was coming to them...and the rest is up to someone else.
and i won't get into it too much ( A LIE; but i have like 74937403 other blurbs about this in my drafts, i should not ferally release all that insanity in here ) but it's interesting...because rm!jersey, loses a lot of that subconscious 'good' in the process of being 'bad'.
because, after his drastic kyley b transformation into ivy league jersey, he, for the first time, is being noticed in a 'positive' way by people on the outside and he's getting 'positive' attention from them, and he feels...for once, powerful — even though, really, he's essentially rendered powerless and is chained to the approval of these people and destroys himself every moment of everyday...to be in a pretty, and small, and palatable package for them...
( yes, i want k*ll myself. )
but he BECOMES the very EVIL that he was hellbent on destroying and starts doing EXACTLY what those people did to him. and because he is so unhappy and morose and hurt and devastated, he finds outsiders, weak people, but mostly, just looks...happy? :((((
…unbothered, merely existing...and decides
to psychologically debase and torture every drop of happiness from that individual, to make his self esteem better and make him feel like, good, i am so much better than that miserable worm, squirming away, squinting at the light it once basked in...
now it can be as insufferable and small...
— As I Am. </3
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH. BROTHERS, THIS SHIT MAKES ME SO SAD. I AM SOOOOO UPSET LOL.
NOOOOOO--
and they're both brutal, kyley b and jerseykyle ( who, really, do need that distinction because they are...VERY different ) jersey, one, is far worse than kyley b, i don't CARE if he could twist your intestined into rope and hang you with them...the things that jerseykyle can say, as the most beautiful man EVER, Using That Voice,
looking at you with the most disgust and contempt and unworthiness you've ever felt and completely debase you in a couple crisp, dififnued, academic words...and not touch you a single time, bc you're pathetic and beneath him...you can heal a broken bone in a couple weeks...but your mind? your heart? your self esteem?
your once…wealthy, healthy feelings of self worth?
when jerseykyle reduces you into ash with his eyes, when your body was a temple and he burns it down, like somehow, it will make his stronger where he feels weak and helpless or like it will some how vindicate stanley marsh...it is very, very, very difficult to make that rubble into a city again. like...that man will RUIN YOU LIFE.
( pleaaaAasee kiss me!!! pICK ME CHOOSE MESHSJ )
but jersey is scary in a very...bone-chilling, below-freezing, self-pleasing, self-destructive ( but in a more subtle, seemingly artistic, less 'unhand me, you big brute, ya no-good palooka' kind of way...
and, instead, it's this twisted, muted, shadowy…
...oh wow, you...really are the devil in a fresh pressed suit, college student siren who leads boys to their untimely demise, and drains them of their lifeforce in his bedroom they way he would a dry glass of wine or a cheap bodega cigarettes like in a tasteful, snake charmer kind of way...a dark academic, sleek, chic, fuck-and-succubus way )
like jerseykyle is a very pretentious, jane austenatcious, bond villian type of self-destructive...that revolves around mentally preying on the weak/innocent...because he hates himself and wants literally everyone to hate themselves more than him...so he can like himself.
and when he guts you its, in a mentally incapacitant, poisonous, cruel and insidious way, in a...classically trained, philosophical, fashionable, was...in the way a thorn on the most beautiful rose you've ever seen would gut you...or a delicate antique letter opener...might slash your palm open, gash you and bleed you dry...
whereas kyley b was a faaaar less tasteful or restrained ( in that sense but jersey is still unhinged ) destroyer of worlds...he was very hands on, ( jerseykyle will not touch you unless he has to, he'll only punch you if you will not shut the fuck up and touch you as little and impersonally as possible to sleep with you…which is ironic, i know )
kyley b is a very fast and loose, wild animal, loose canon, carnivorous 'i'll slice ya and dice ya and put ya on ice ya' and beat you until you are bloody and unrecognizable...but on the inside...
he's just this...Frightened Little Animal. :(
who hurts you because he is scared you will reach for him, and when you put food in your palm, bites it because he's scared it's a trick.
aaaaaaaaaaaaah....idk he is my special little man.
okay, shutting the fuck up now HERE IS YOUR SNIPPET:
( edit: LAMBORGHINI MERCY, ITS LONG; LO SIENTO! )
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
GOOD LUCK, BAMBI. </3 ;-;
( just a...branch in my eye. ) i also was worried about the nicknames being a little too...'fem...inine-ish?' which, i glawhSSED on earlier, but wrote this little extra dialogue as an example using all the little satana stan nicknames ( aw ) because i am gonna be honest, it's gender neutral and not personal, he'd tell you, straight up -- my man always keeps it one-hunna and 100% kosh, ketzele; --
something like:
'ya can throw daisy chains ova a pile of cowshit aaaaaalll you want, masug; but no matta how ya dress it up, when alls said and done; and all those pretty flowers keel ova' and die...all your fine exteria design... fuck: what's cityslicka for 'useless, fancy schmanchy holy crappola' uhhh...your...dainty lil'tle 'floral achootrama' or whateva';
gesundheit.
...means fuck awhll in new jersey, 'cause the freakin' se-wer systems! ( manure, really ) like all the people, are all totally wasted, loaded and gunked-up with broken needles, instant spray tan and crushed up cred cans; wow, golly gee whiz, dory. so...you mean to tell me...my whole life...is all a buncha crud, huh?
o-oh, no, shit i might cr--
HA! gotcha, sensodyne! cause one man's trash...is another man's treasure...and you better get comfy and rest your goddamn laurels on a street corner where a prostitute isn't going to give you freakin' hepatisis mauling ya for struting your stuff on her turf...
cause this, outta townie...
— is your new home sweet home. ;)
...wonderful little joint, ain't it? you should see when it's all lit up with gang violence...that'll really jumpstart your heart, sug. it's, uh, kinda like fireworks...if they were fucking HORRIBLE and KILLED YA.
so...and i'll talk real slow, because i'm not sure i speak malibu freakin' barbie: h-e-r-e....in...hoebroken, ( that's where we are...in case you forgot, bamb; don't look so scared, honey; the junkies will only give ya little nibble; not too many teeth there otherwise. or, uh, oxygen flowin' to the ole cranium, they're basically harmless! uh...not him. staaaaaaaaaay, the hell away away from him, sug. aY, YOUSE! SNAP CRACKLE POP! KEEP YOUR FKN DISTANCE OR I'LL CAP YA BI--
basically; v.i.p., between you...and me, there's crap...on crap...on --wait! could it be--oh no, just more CRAP lined from the rock bottom of nj all the way up to the ny-sea to shining sea skyline ( might be our fault, but the fuckin' big city biddies and hoity-freakin-toitys out there can hoof it a little; by that, i mean horse shit; fuck 'em. uh, no offense, bam. ) i shot that one outta the park a little,
ball-point is:
it's backed allllll the way...TA HELL. which, might even be kinda, uh, nice...well, compared to this fuckin' trash compacta. so take a good, long, whiff sweetheart; ‘cause here? everybody's shit stinks...
— even yours, princess.
which—OOH.
es-Specially, yours.
ever heard of a shower? you r-e-e-k."
hEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP THATS MY BOOOOOOOOOOOYFRIEND! look at him!!!! I MISS HIM EVERYDAY; KYLEY 'IF YOU AIN'T MAKIN' MONEY, TAKE! YA! BROKE! ASS! OUTTA! HOE(BOKEN)! BEFORE I BREAK IT SOMEMORE, BREAK IT SOMEMORE...(B)-I T C H!"
like and suuuuuuUUubSCRRIIIBE~
-uncle nina, the gay kyley lGBea(t)in'theshitouttayaBETCH agenda
#i'll fill the tags l8r BUT CAN YALL BELIEVE I POSTED SOMETHIN LIKE FUCK U TUMOR HOW MY DICK tAST--#but ur welcome or i'm sorry also the spelling is shit but i'm blind okAY I HAVE A TUMOR U HAVE TO TELL ME IM PRETTY#for me going on and on and OOOOOOOON in this post but i hope the lore thrilled you and the exerpt was punchy and cunty#i do really have a lot of love in my heart for kyley b i miss him everyday...but he was unrestrained and lawless#and i will talk about it later but...i think he always wanted to be classical and refined...but never had the means to do so#so actually he was meant to be a sleek chic red wine drinking dark academic intellectual boy with a passionate feral spirit#and i LOOOOOOOOOVE HIM FOR THAT NUANCED KING#i am very passionate about the rm flashback santana stan bambi and masuggash nicknames very cute to me#not raven of crimson dawn being like AAAAAAAAAAA and jerseykyle also being like AAAAAAAAAAAA#like THAT WASNT FOR YOU I DONT KNOW WHY I SAID THAT I USED TO CALL MY DEAD BEST FRIEND THAT SORRY#and ravenstan like SO SORRY ABOUT YOUR FRIEND DO U LIKE HIM WERE U IN LOVE WITH HIM IF HE WAS STILL HERE#mental...illness...both of you...#i'm allowed to joke about 5150s because i literally got 5150'd twice but i'm calling one in for rs and jk bc they are INSANE#NO YOU CANNOT BE ROOMATES I KNOW THEY WOULD TRY AND SQUEEZE A QUICKIE IN BETWEEN EVERY#15 MINUTE CHECK IN I AM SCREAMING I JUST FUCKING KNOW IT ENJOY YOUR 14 DAY STAY GAY BOYS#FUCKING NASTY AND UNBELIEVABLE ( never stop kings...maybe uh not every 15 minutes BUT GO OFF )
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sockdooe · 4 months
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Every time someone edits Keith in the black paladin armor an angel loses its wings.
#keith kogane#listen I understand that he needs to be the black paladin but he should be there temporarily#it’s worse when people do it with lance#I’m sorry but Keith cannot be the black paladin in my mind heart and soul#that spot is RESERVED for SHIRO DAMMIT#HE FAUGHT SO HARD TO BE WITH THE BLACK LION AND YOUR TELLING ME HE DOESNT EVEN GET TO SIT IN HER SEAT ANYMORE????#IM SORRY?? ARE THE LIONS NOT COUNCIOUS??? DID BLACK JUST NOT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT SHIRO AFTERWARDS???#it’s some fucking horse shit#and Lance should’ve stayed in blue and allura should’ve gotten red#allura dead ass does not fit within the blue lion#I love her but that woman is a red paladin#I mean even the fucking show jokes about it#lance being in blue fit his character far more and I believe would’ve led to far more growth#I hate how much people argue about who the better black paladin would be whether it be for Lance or Keith#its shiro#through and through#he ran so Keith could walk bitch#also yes Keith being with the blades is cool and it makes people realize just how much of a pain it is to not have a lion to protect you#to show the true stuggle of those who are still actively fighting against space nazis#that don’t rely on a giant robot#but here’s my thing#I don’t like that Keith separated#because I feel like his character goes backwards#I would’ve preferred Keith actually being there for his teammates and family then almost sacrificing himself over and over again#I also don’t think ryou should ever be in the black lion#like piloting#cause he’s not shiro and I think the black lion would know that#I just wish there was more shiro appreciation within the fandom#like how do people not understand that shiro is an amazing leader???#why does he have to get replaced???
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lesbiradshaw · 1 year
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i wish nonlesbians could be Normal about lesbian headcanons or characters
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zouisalmightie · 11 days
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l0rd-0f-c0ws · 22 days
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I frequently feel completely isolated no matter how much I talk to people. So that's fun
#sorry if anyone sees these im tired of using my personal discord servet to vent. i always spiral too much#anyways i have an idea for a good poem to write for class because of recent events#ughhhh idk i just wish i wasnt so annoying about asking if i can open ip to people#or if someone would just ask if i was okay. i mean actually id probably lie i am not actually good at being open.#but like hey idk it feels nice to feel like people genuinely want to know#ughhhhfhfhf i do this to myself sometimes JSHSJSKDJDJD#welp its just how life goes. i feel lonely all the time and i soldier on#surely helping the next person will make me feel better! nope. surely helping yhis next person will make me feel better! nope. surely-#tgats me. thats what i sound like#yeah idk it feels like everyone is going through something worse than me so itd be a moral failing on my part#to ask them if i could just like. feel bad. noticeably#not even talk about it just look down and out of it for a day#yknow i emailed one of my teachers asking permission to go by a new preferred name#this is at like. a massive very queer and trans art school.#and i asked him permission to do this#and i was joking with my friends about how pathetic i sounded in it#and one of them patted me on the head and said “there there buddy” like very jokingly#but i almost cried because thats the first time in so long someone has like. really tried to comfort me#or shown me much physical affection#my mom gives me hugs and stuff but thats always about her. i dont blame her shes got a lot of stuff going on#but idk its really selfish of me but i just wanna have people see me and feel bad for me and it be about my pain for a little while#ill get over it im just being a teenager but shit god fucking damnit#i just want a break from feeling like my world is falling apart#then getting some footing#then it falling apart again#okay i feel a bit better now better stop the complain train JDJDJSKSJD#hey why do i never hear that it rhymes and everything thays so good#damn i gotta use that more#welp weve reached our stop sorry if anyone ever read thjs. hope you have a nice day tho lol
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dansevilpianotea · 1 month
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trenchcroats · 5 months
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Aaaaarhrhhhhhgggggg I HATE BEARINGS. I HATE ANGLES. I HATE MATHS. I HATE FUCKING CALCULATIONS WHY DO WE HAVE TO DO STUFF WITH MATHS ANY LARGER THAN DIVISION WHERES THE FUCKING CLASSES ON TAXES OR SOMW SHIT. FUCKING. MAPS??? I JOINED GEOGRAPHY TO KNOW WHERE PLACES ARE AND I GOT SOCIAL POLITICS AND EROSION????? STOP GIVING US BULLSHIT RE CLASSES WHY ARE THEY THE SAME THING IN A DIFFERENT PACKAGE
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