#this is a very basic execution but eeeeeeeee i got it out

[screamn-robo-drawin]

graphic design is my passion ft. baldur's gate murder lobster flavored cookies

[twilightknight17]

Today on P5S, we’re taking a nice relaxing dip in the hot sprin--

Fukuoka, Kyushu! The plan was to keep going straight through to Kyoto, but Makoto was hurting from all the driving, so we pulled over with the intention of spending the night in a proper hotel and having a good meal. Which, of course, means ramen, because we gotta try the local ramen in each place. ^_^

Even Morgana wanted to try, though he requested that Akira blow on it, first, because “feline tongues are sensitive.”

The plan was to stay in Fukuoka until Makoto was feeling better, but Zenkichi called and basically said we had to get to Kyoto right away. So after a night of sleep, we got up the next morning, and we finally learned why Haru hasn’t been driving, despite having her license.

My wife has a lead foot.

Apparently no one but Joker and Queen ever drove the Mona Bus, because everyone but Makoto seemed extremely surprised.

Supposedly it was eight hours to Kyoto. We were there by noon.

Anyway, this old bar is apparently Zenkichi’s safe house, if anything ever goes wrong on an investigation.

He’s tracked the list of names that we found in the lab back to a politician called Jyun Owada, who was apparently a Shido supporter. This guy would benefit from changes of heart, and one of his supporters is the CEO of Madicce, Mr. Akira Konoe. They determine that Owada wouldn’t have a Jail himself, but that he’s probably getting Konoe to influence people for him. Which means that, since Sophia sensed a Jail in Osaka (that we missed because we were all screaming at Haru’s driving), it’s most likely that Konoe is a Monarch.

So my dart hit the board, I just gotta see how close to the bullseye.

Zenkichi heads to Osaka for a meeting with Konoe to try to get his keyword, and convinces the kids to stay behind. They need to rest and recover so they can be at their best for the Jail. Plus, he’s put them up in the nicest hotel in Kyoto! Which means it’s time to go to the hot springs!

The boys are having a lovely time relaxing. Even Morgana’s chilling on a rock with his tail in the water, basking in the chance to really unwind.

.......Atlus. We need to have words.

Not only was this absolutely unnecessary...

It’s the exact same scenario as P3. We’re even in the same goddamn city. If I thought Gekkoukan would be willing to spend 40K per person a night, it might as well be the same hotel.

Apparently, the boys went in right before the time switched over, and didn’t realize. And now, once again, they’re up for an unjust execution. At least Yosuke and Teddie were actually peeping in P4.

Personally, I think a better plan would have been to start yelling, “Who’s there?” as soon as the girls came in. Sneaking just makes it look like you’re up to something nefarious. It was an honest mistake. And really, trying to get out without causing a scene isn’t a heinous crime.

We don’t see who knocked over the thing that got them caught, but they do get caught. There’s no gameplay here. Defeat is inevitable. And...

The girls jump immediately to accusing them of being perverts. Never mind that they’re wet because they just got out of the damn hot spring. And the boys try to explain. They try their best. They explain that they didn’t realize the time had switched. They explain that they’d gotten locked in without noticing, because the men’s side doors lock when it switches over. “It was an accident,” Akira says, plaintively.

And Makoto looks at these boys that she’s fought alongside for over a year. The ones who risked their lives to save her and everyone more than once. The teammates that she stood beside as they shot a god and saved the entire damn world. The ones who, on this very roadtrip, stepped in to defend Haru from Natsume being a harassing jackass... And she says...

She sounds actually angry.

And she beats them up.

For an honest mistake.

I know this is a trope, but in this particular instance, it’s stupid, and it feels incredibly out of character. None of the boys deserve this, but Akira least of all. He’s your goddamn leader; he’s done more for any of you than anyone else. He’s been falsely accused of shit over and over, and now he has to deal with it from his own teammates?

For shame, Atlus. Shitty writing, especially because this event is never going to be brought up again. Was this supposed to be funny? Because in this situation, it wasn’t at all.

...now that I’m done being cranky, let’s go check how Zenkichi’s meeting in Osaka is going.

Hm. Nowhere, apparently, because Konoe’s gone for the day. Weird. Zenkichi had an appointment and everything.

Now let’s check on... well fuck.

Commissioner Kaburagi, Zenkichi’s boss, is summoned by the commissioner general and the previously mentioned Owada. This asshole is claiming to have evidence that the Phantom Thieves are behind all the changes of heart. They hacked into EMMA!

You’ve got a lot of fucking nerve, when you’re the one behind this.

.......maybe this lady is better than I thought.

She says that there’s not enough proof, and that they need to look into things more. The commissioner general counters that the Thieves are going to be tried for murder. Because apparently they killed that poor man at the Okinawa facility after they learned how to get into EMMA.

Kaburagi knows this is bullshit and wants to investigate more, but they basically tell her to do it or else. And promise that she’ll be commissioner general one day. After the current commissioner general launches his political career with the capture of the Phantom Thieves, of course. And she’s just going to follow orders. Never mind. God. I didn’t misjudge her at all.

Konoe goes on TV and announces that they’re shutting down EMMA temporarily, because the Phantom Thieves hacked it and stole personal information. He also informs everyone that they murdered one of his employees. Zenkichi and I had the same reaction, which was “WHAT?!”

Look at this asshole.

Zenkichi realizes what’s going to happen and takes off for Kyoto. Cut to that night, where there’s an entire fucking squad of police outside of the hotel in riot gear. For seven teenagers. Zenkichi shows up and basically pleads with Kaburagi to stop and think, because the real mastermind is still out there.

Kaburagi snaps back with, “You mean like with your wife?” and Zenkichi shuts up. Low blow, lady. She also points out that he seems very attached to criminals.

Before Kaburagi can have the police storm the place, Zenkichi yells for the kids to run, and gets arrested for it. The kids make it to the safe house, but when they find out about the arrest, they want to go after him. They end up agreeing to let Makoto handle that, and then we get a look at King Asshole himself.

I hate how nice this man’s office is.

And I’m kind of afraid of EMMA.

Good luck with that, though. You’d have to break them first; you can’t change the heart of someone stable enough to have a persona. Not that this fuck would know that.

God, he’s like if Shido and Maruki had a fucked-up kid. He wants his own personal team capable of entering the metaverse and changing people, to make the world “better”. Holy fuck.

Somehow I don’t think you’re the one in the right, when you’re talking about making us a “sacrifice to bring about [your] new world order.”

So the next day, the Thieves get a text from Akane’s phone number, that basically says she’s been kidnapped. It’s clearly a trap, but they all agree that they have to go. According to the text, if they want her back, they need to come to Inari Taisha.

Also known as Fushimi Inari, the largest Inari Shrine in Japan. I’ve been there.

I have literally been right there. I have a picture:

And so the kids head into a Jail based on Fushimi Inari where the keyword is “Phantom Thieves”, and I try not to explode from sheer glee because oh boy I thought I’d have to wait a lot longer for this and also I didn’t expect it to be somewhere I know.

Eeeeeeeee~

They find Akane tied up and all go running towards her. Futaba trips, and before she can catch up, a huge cage snatches up the rest of them, because surprise, the Jail Monarch is Akane, and she’s absolutely ready to lord it over them.

Meanwhile, Zenkichi is getting beaten up in interrogation and taking it like a champ.

But it’s okay, because Makoto called in a favor. <3

Futaba managed to get back to the safe house, and Zenkichi met up with her there after Sae got him released.

So you know that bit in P5 where the phan-site poll hits 100% belief and we summoned a demon the size of a skyscraper? That’s Zenkichi right now, except he’s hitting Maximum Dad Energy and I’m pretty sure he’s going to summon his persona.

There’s a cool stealth sequence where you have to sneak by a bunch of shadows, because Zenkichi doesn’t have a persona. Futaba runs navigation for him, but it’s so funny because he... sneaks like a regular person. He doesn’t leap into cover with superhuman speeds.

It might have been cool to play Zenkichi With A Gun, but stealth mode was fun, too. XD

And then the confrontation with Akane. She gives the Thieves a choice of who wants their heart changed first, but before anyone can stupidly volunteer, Zenkichi shows up, and a few more things get revealed. Most importantly, the fact that Owada is the one who killed Zenkichi’s wife, and Zenkichi got death threats directed at Akane if he didn’t stop investigating. No fucking wonder he couldn’t solve the case. But Akane is too disillusioned to listen, because she doesn’t understand. And Zenkichi is forced to confront that at some point, he compromised his morals, telling himself he was doing it for Akane.

This line wasn’t sung, but I kind of wish it was, considering who his persona is. :P

Zenkichi admits that he might have been wrong. But he was doing it to protect the only family he had left.

“But at least I know what makes a person evil. Evil only cares about itself. It’s the mark of a man who would bring another to ruin and dare not show remorse.”

And his awakening was badass.

Shitty picture, but his literal shadow had glowing eyes while it was forming the contract. It was so cool. :D

Wolf is awesome. After beating up a whole hoard of shadows by himself, Akane got away, the Thieves were freed, and we all went back to the safe house to rest. And I swear, you take a nap for one hour, and cannot get any peace. XDDD

Thank you, darling. Now I gotta figure out what deck that’s from.

So that was today. Technically I only played for like...2 and a half hours?? But god, we hit the hot springs and everything just flung itself directly off a cliff and all I could do was hold on.

I have so many thoughts about things!!! But I need to see more first. But this has been fantastic overall.

[all-hail-the-witcher]

questionable government spies: chapter 8

all previous chapters are under # spy boys

alright so I’m going against all of my rules literally ever posting this cause I only have like a chapter and a few sentences written after this one and I’m usually two ahead but like school and y’all need comic relief in the form of race being a freaking idiot 

also this is a link you might wanna play when you get to /the part/

https://youtu.be/F16O5OAK2K8

___________

ship: platonic ralbert, eventual sprace 

warnings: Race is a little shit

word count: not very long

editing: I’m actually not sure ignoring I finished editing this one

___________

Race threw off his covers and bolted into the shower. Two weeks had passed since the day they had met with Spot. He had gotten a call very late the previous night saying that he was going to be going through gang initiation today - whatever that meant - and he was supposed to report to a coffee shop in Brooklyn at 8 am sharp.

Race didn’t really know why he was being sent to a coffee shop, or why he had to be out through initiation, but if it gave him a chance to flex in front of Spot he wasn’t complaining.

He dressed in a pair of black adidas track pants and a fitted black long sleeve shirt and fluffed his blonde hair before walking into the kitchen.

It was barely 7 and Albert was probably still asleep - he had managed to sleep the entire night in his own room last night without nightmares so Race had yet to see him - which meant Race couldn’t have coffee, because Albert made the best coffee ever and his tasted like dirt. So, Race did what any caffeine deprived person would: woke up Albert to make him coffee.

He paired his phone to the Bluetooth speaker and sifted through his Disney Spotify playlist until he found the song he was looking for. Then, while the intro played, he banged around rather loudly as he prepared his lucky charms.

The chorus of the song began and Race put down the cereal he had been puring to scream along, well, sort of.

“No one's nerd as Gaston! No one catches birds like Gaston! No one says WHAT THE FUCK RICHARD like Gaston!” Race screamed at the top of his lungs. This wasn’t how he usually woke Albert up, but hey, he was going to be a gang member today, he needed to get in the villain spirit - Race style.

“For there’s no man in town half as memelyyy! Perfect, a pure meme god! You can ask any Tom, Dick, or Stanley. And they'll tell you whose team they'd prefer to be onnnnnnnnnnnnnn…”

Race cranked up the music louder and grabbed his spoon to use as a microphone as he pranced around the kitchen dramatically. “Whoooooo’s aaaaas meme as Gaston? Who can scream like Gaston? Who can do Krispy Kreme flips like Gaston? As a memelord, yes, I'm intiiiiiiimidaaaating! My, what a boi, that Gaston!”

From Albert’s room, Race heard a loud groan and he smiled. He hoped Albert was appreciating this. True art such as this was only created once in a lifetime.

“I needed encouragement, thank you, LeFou. Well, there's no one as easy to bolster as yoooooooooou! Too much? ...Yuuup.”

Race paused dramatically before leaping into the livingroom to continue his performance.

“No one bakes like Gaston! Has a face like Gaston! In a vine comp no one says they were roommates like Gaston!”

“When I flirt I sneak up with wii music,” Race tip toed awkwardly into Albert’s room. “And all of my friends say a praaayer. First, I hope what I say is not too sick, then I flirt from behind- Is that fair? I don't care!”

Albert rolled over, pulling his pillow over his head as Race jumped up onto his bead and began to sing dramatically. “No one tickles like Gaston! Eats pickles like Gaston! No one says look at all those chickens like Gaston! I'm especially good at quoting lazzzzzzzytown!”

Albert let out another loud groan, which Race ignored, and pulled his blanket over his head. “TEN POINTS FOR GASTON!” Race yelled as he did a straddle jump off the the bed and ran back toward the kitchen.

“When I was a lad, I ate four despasitos every morning to help me get large! And now that I'm grown, I eat five despasitos,” Race climbed up onto the counter and tried to flex, “So I'm roughly the size of a goooooOOOOOOOOODDDDDDD!”

Race grabbed two pots off the counter and began slapping them together on the beat of the song. Then he jumped down off the counter and began parading around the apartment - first the living room, then the hallway and then into Alberts room, all the while banging his pots together and improv tap dancing. If Albert didn't wake up after this he was going to have to break out the airhorn.

Race danced back into the kitchen, executing perfect leaps and turns while still banging his pots. He heard a loud clunk, which sounded suspiciously like Albert falling off his bed, and he smiled before climbing back up on the counter to finish off his performance.

“Who has a bed like Gaston? Drinks mead like Gaston? Who can say roadworrrrrrrk ahead like Gastoooooooon? I use yeeting in my everyyyyyyyyyyyyday liiiiiife!” he paused, looking at the pots in his hands. “YEET!” he screamed, throwing them across the kitchen with a fantastic clatter.

“RACETRACK HIGGINS!” Ah, yes. That was Albert, definitely awake and definitely pissed that he was awake. Race could hear him stomping down the hall angrily but that didn't stop him.

“Say it again! Who's a meme among men? Who's the super success? Don't you know? Can't you guess? Ask his fans and his five hangers-on! There's just one boi in town who's got all of it dowwwwwwwwwwwn…”

Albert arrived in the doorway wearing only a pair of sweatpants, his hair rumped from sleep and glaring fantastically at Race who was still standing on the counter. Race gave him a wink and a smirk to which Albert rolled his eyes before he began the final verse of his performance.

“And his name's R-A-C-EEEEEEEEEE.... I believe there's another EEEEEEEEE…… It just occurred to me that I'm illiterate and I've never actually had to spell it out loud beforeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee… Gastoooooooooooooooon!” Race jumped down from the counter and bowed graciously as the song ended.

“Are you trying to start a cult?” Albert said in disbelief, his voice raspy from sleep.

Race looked up at his friend sheepishly. “No…?”

“Then why are you screaming Beauty and the Beast before 7am?” Albert groaned.

Race leaned against the counter, cocked his head, and put on his best pleading face. “Make me coffee?”

Albert muttered several curse words under his breath before moping into the kitchen. “Sure, fine, whatever.”

“Oh, thank you, Albie!” Race exclaimed, clapping his hands. “You’re my favorite person in the whole wide world!”

“Yeah well,” Alber muttered, reaching into the cabinet to pull out the bag of Hazelnut Coffee. “You’re not my favorite person today.”

“I’m not your favorite person any day, am I?” Race sniffled.

“That’s not true,” Albert sighed. “I just don’t like it when you wake me up by screaming incorrect Disney lyrics.”

“Mmmmm so any day that ends in y then,” Race mused and Albert threw a coffee filter at him.

“I don't have time for your bad jokes,” Albert stressed. “You have to be at initiation in like an hour. Let’s go over your cover one more time.”

“Fiiiiine,” Race groaned, hopping up on the counter.

“Alright so, what’s your name?”

“Philip Marx.”

Albert sighed and rolled his eyes. “Tell me why you picked that again?”

“Welllllll,” Race began, “Philip like Philip Carlyle form the Greatest Showman cause he’s a badass and goes from one lifestyle to a complete other, ya know, becomes an outcast and stuff? Isn’t that kinda what it’s like to be in a gang?”

“I don't know,” Albert said rather annoyed as he measured out the coffee grinds. “Also I doubt that people choose their gang names based on a movie about joining the circus.”

“It’s not about joining the circus Albert!” Race smacked his friend with a dishtowel. “It’s about love and loss and finding yourself and realizing who you really are and telling social norms to screw themself and Zack Efron’s just really hot, okay?”

“Alright, fine, whatever,” Albert sighed. Race was beginning to regret waking him up, he was acting far more grumpy than usual. “Do I even want to know why you picked that last name?”

“Because Karl Marx is a badass.”

Race laughed as Albert turned to him, sputtering incoherently. “Ra- wha- why- ugh.” He buried his face in his hands. “First of all, Karl Marx is dead. Second of all, he’s not a badass he invented communism and basically started the downfall of Russia and a crapload of other problems. Third of all-” Albert was interrupted by the timer going off signaling that Race’s coffee was done brewing.

“Yeah, yeah, I get it,” Race smirked. “He’s problematic, like me. Also we both have really great hair.”

Albert wordlessly handed Race his cup of coffee. “Remind me why I thought it was a good idea for you to do this job again?”

Race pondered. He couldn't exactly say that it was because he didn't want Albert to get in harm’s way. “Because I’m a good agent and you love me?” He hopped off the counter to pour some coffee creamer in his coffee.

“Close enough,” Albert sighed. “Now hurry up and eat your cereal. I gotta get you to initiation.”

•••

Initiation, as it turned out, was a gruff looking man inside the coffee shop handing him a folded piece of paper with a strange code on it. Race solved the code quickly, it was a simple number scramble that said: down three blocks, back parking lot.

He walked out of the coffee shop, down the street three blocks, as per the instructions.

“Rapunzel, where are you going,” Albert asked through the comms unit in his ear.

“Down three blocks to some back parking lot,” Race responded.

“Alright, Vincent just pulled up a street camera. Looks like there’s a guy in his late 20s there and that's it.”

“Okay,” Race responded, a little disappointed that Spot wasn't there. “I’ll talk to you guys when I’m done.”

“Be safe, Rapunzel.”

•••

Two hours later, Race climbed into the back of Jack’s van, tired and very much in need of a shower.

“How was it?” Albert asked, turning around and laughing at Race’s flopped position on the floor of the van.

“Tiring,” Race sighed. “I had to break into a store and steal a cd without setting anything off.”

“An actual store?” Jack asked from the driver’s seat.

“Yes, an actual store,” Race said pulling himself up.

“Ah, yes,” Albert said, “my best friend, a petty thief.”

“I’ve been a petty thief my whole life, Albie, remember when we-”

“Ah ah ah” Albert cut him off, gesturing to Jack. “We have children present.”

Race laughed and rolled his eyes as Jack protested. “Anyway, the guy had me also do all this fancy parkour junk and self defense stuff. Haven’t worked that hard since training with Jacobs.”

Albert made a sympathetic face. FBI training camp had been the most strenuous thing either of them had ever done to date. “What was the guys name, again?”

“Oscar Delancey,” Race said, wrinkling his nose. “He was nasty. He kept pushing me unnecessarily hard. And he said something weird. He told me ‘oh, you’re him’ which didn't make any sense.”

“Yeah, that's kinda weird,” Albert agreed. “Maybe he expected you to be someone else.”

“Maybe,” Race brushed it off. “Anyway, I got my first mission tomorrow. Gotta report to the used car place at 9 am sharp.”

Albert and Jack let out a cheer. “That’s fantastic, Race!” Albert said, shooting him a smile. “Pretty soon we’re gonna crack this case right open.”

Race couldn't agree more.

___________

ah yes that song took me three days to write and it’s probablt the best thing I’ve ever written

did anyone catch the jace quote ?

also pay close attention to the greatest showman references....

also shits about to get real yo it’s going the hell down

feedback is always appreciated hmu to be on the tag list

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