#this is so shitty I’M SO SORRYIRHFE

[mimizficsz]

Hi could I request a JD x female reader flirting headcanons (before and after they start dating). All his bad pick lines and ways to try and impress her, but they never work lol

Y was this so goddamn short

My brain got stuck in the middle of writing this and I had to pause for 2 days just for it to turn out this short.

JD x reader headcanons : flirting

Warnings: Sexual/Nsfw flirting , Nothing physical tbh. DNI if you’re uncomfortable with this type of stuff, Minors DNI.

-At first he'd probably be all showy when he saw you. You know, trying to get you to see him do cool stuff but he obviously fails...

-After several embarrassing attempts, he got your number somehow (Or however they communicate but I’m pretty sure they have the internet in trolls in some shorts)

-When you get to know him, as in chatting with him more, hanging out with him, randomly in conversations he'd drop stupid pick up lines and either you'd brush it off and ccompletely ignore it, flirt back, or laugh (Maybe don’t do the last option, the first time you did he felt so embarrassed he locked himself in rhonda for 2 days without ever coming out)

-The flirty “jokes” would eventually get more and more meaningful… As in stupid poetry type of flirting. Except he accidentally offends and insults you most of the time while trying to do it.

“..Your voice is so deafening”

“Excuse you?”

Most of the time he won’t even realize it until he’s laying in his bed

-Now when you start flirting back or even flirting with him first, he’s just all… “Huh”, “Am I tweaking right now” , “WHAHRHFHEHFHHS” , and “Oh shit” basically he’d start malfunctioning and have passed out on several occasions.

-Somehow he actually caught you off guard once after trying to make his own pick up lines from what Branch taught him (he forced Branch to help him get better with flirting respectfully)

“I can stay here forever and get lost in your eyes..”

You just stare at him all like “Is this really John Dory?”

Turns into awkward silence once he notices himself staring way too long until one of you changes the subject.

Flirting but you’re dating now :]

-Watch as the flirting becomes so much more fucking explicit

-It’s either you or JD that starts it. Either way, the other would just be in disbelief. “Did he/they really just say that?”

-Overtime the explicit flirting becomes normalized :p but I think that you’d occasionally catch JD off guard.

John was sipping on coffee and you brought up a random topic while brewing your own

“Which name do you like to be called by more? JD, John, John dory, Dory??”

“I honestly don’t know babe.”

“I think John is the best. It’s the most moanable out of all of them”

“PFHFGT— WHAT?”

“What??”

Now he has to clean his shorts because he spat coffee on them.

Or something like,

“I actually hate you so much.”

“Doesn’t seem like it based on what you kept saying last night.”

“JOHN DORY”