#this is terrainofheartfelt canon now

[terrainofheartfelt]

Liz's definitive track assignment list that nobody asked for (but I know I'm right)

"Fortnight" (featuring Post Malone) -- DAIRFAIR DAIRFAIR DAIRFAIR

"The Tortured Poets Department" -- derena breakup track. derena divorce track. take your pick. serena pov <3

"My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys" -- 🪑

"Down Bad" -- changing course because this is rwrb firstprince alex post lake house I'M RIGHT

"So Long, London" -- same for above. acd-coded

"But Daddy I Love Him" -- blair waldorfian. i'm having his baby jk lmao. unhinged.

"Fresh Out the Slammer" -- calling it another post derena divorce. pov both of them. dan floats to blair, serena gravitates to carter. and. fuck it. 🪑divorce. "I served my time" and all that shit

"Florida!!!" -- ivy/charlie. florida woman. fuck this city i'm getting fucked up in the gulf. yeah. she could have been so much more.

"Guilty as Sin?" -- BLAIRRRRRRRRRR s5ep4 if you want to get specific. reading steamy book scenes. gurl.

"Who's Afraid of Little Old Me?" -- JENNY GIRL. "I am what you trained me to be." I MEANNNNN.

"I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can)" -- 🪑

"Loml" -- dan. sad dan. sad lonely boy

"I Can Do It With a Broken Heart" -- serena. always. constantly. (though cherry & I also agree it's firstprince coded)

"The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived" -- louis divorce yeehaw

"The Alchemy" -- serenate reconciliation

"Clara Bow" -- blair & jenny and the girls that are destined to replace them.

[themimsyborogove]

Tagged by @amchara 💖💖💖

How many works do you have on ao3?

39, but a few are ficlet collections. If I separated them out, it would be closer to 150

What’s your total ao3 word count?

296,544

What fandoms do you write for?

Mostly TSC. Dipped my toes in Shadow and Bone show fic a little bit, but I think I got all I wanted to write there out of my system.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Just Keep Walking, Step By Step

And We Keep Living Anyway

Hold on Hope

The World is Gonna Roll Me

We Made It Here Through the Storm

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I always try to. If I ever don’t respond, it usually means I saw the email while I was somewhere I couldn’t stop and write a reply, then forgot that I hadn’t actually responded.

What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

We’ll Have to Muddle Through Somehow, the Ragnor&Tessa&Raphael fic about what happened to Thule!Ragnor. No happy endings allowed in Thule

What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Probably Like a Storybook Story, the Princess Bride AU. It ends with a solution to the mortal/immortal ship angst

Do you get hate on fics?

Only once from a known troll. I think most of what I write is too niche for the majority of the fandom to have a strong enough opinion on that would make them upset enough to write hate comments

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I still write some, but I’m not comfortable posting it anymore. Most of what I write is character exploration through smut or hurt/comfort. I actually ended up working out some real headcanons for Ragnor and Hypatia through the nonsense I was writing a couple of months ago that I might be able to edit into something postable eventually.

Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I’ve never written one, but a friend and I used to joke about a warlock squad/Gundam crossover

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I don’t think so

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No. I wouldn’t be opposed to trying, but I think I’m too controlling and stuck in my own headcanons about certain characters to be a fun person to cowrite with

What’s your all-time favorite ship?

Catarina/Ragnor, mostly because I’ve put so much work into making content for them

What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

We Share the Weary Load, which was missing moments from QoAaD. There were a few more I wanted to write, but I just ran out of steam and never picked them back up

What are your writing strengths?

Filling in the holes canon leaves for more minor characters and relationships/friendships that happen mostly off-page, coming up with rules for how magic works, and swinging from humor into angst with no warning

What are your writing weaknesses?

Long plotty stories

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I use a word or two sometimes, but not whole sentences of dialogue. Japanese is the only second language I speak well enough to do it with, but I think throwing whole sentences of Japanese into a fic would just be jarring and confusing

First fandom you wrote for?

TSC

Favorite fic you’ve written?

Different ones hit different spots, so it’s hard to pick one as a favorite. But since Christmas season is upon us, Florida Man might be winning right now

Tagging @terrainofheartfelt @ibrushmyteeth-donttellanyone @chibi-tsukiko @upagainstabookcase @vivacephoenix

[blairwaldcrf]

my words shoot to kill when I'm mad (fic drabble)

Summary:  or, 2x08 if Jenny had overheard her brother Dan yell at Nate.

read/comment on ao3 here

Brought to you by this post of @terrainofheartfelt’s I couldn’t help but add onto awhile back after @strideofpride shared this very haunting, well-written Nate-centered fic. ily both and i’m sorry that i’m not sorry <3

given the rather serious topics, please be warned of the (canon) past-assault mentions

 “How dare you,” Jenny all but screams at him, pure rage as she comes up and shoves him not dissimilar to the way he’d shoved Nate not three minutes ago. “How dare you! You think--,” she pauses to get closer to him so the other people in the hallway won’t overhear, voice still firm despite the lowering. “You think because he’s a hot guy that he was fine? After Vanessa got Blair involved you still thought, what? Everything was consensual? That because he showed interest first he’s not allowed to change his mind?”

 “Jenny--,” he tries.

 “Is that what you think about me and Chuck?” she asks, voice breaking.

 He can’t feel the floor underneath him anymore.

 “No, of course not. I--,”

 “Go to hell, Dan,” she spits back at him with venom. “At least there you can’t inflict yourself on others.”

 Because even before she was Blair’s pupil, she still knew exactly how to hurt him the most.

 He leaves before Vanessa can find him, which he knows is selfish given how she must be hurting over the kiss, but the idea of her finding out exactly what he had said to Nate is too hard to bear. Jenny was right-- Vanessa had told him. She had actually listened to Dan’s suggestion and gotten Blair involved, which he should have seen as a red flag, but their entire world was filled with red flags, fields of them even. His cheeks flush with shame and embarrassment as he remembers his words to Vanessa-- something gigolo something-- and he wants to throw up. Surely vomiting at this point would feel better than the encompassing nausea, but his stomach doesn’t acquiesce.

 Blind ignorance doesn’t excuse his actions, especially when he wasn’t even blind, not completely. He had seen the empty brownstone with no furniture or electricity, had known Anne Archibald was off at some vacation home without her barely eighteen-year-old son. Known that money was needed. Dan simply hadn’t wanted to think about the reality because it was just too fucking dark and depressing.

    When Dan arrives back at the loft, there’s a small mercy in the fact that his dad and Jenny aren’t there. Only Nate, packing the few things he even had to bring over, back into a duffel bag. The dirty blonde doesn’t look up all the way at the entrance, only enough to see it’s Dan, and continues back to the task at hand.

 “It’s fine, Dan,” the other boy says with a weary sigh, but he won’t meet his eyes as he continues. “I’ll figure something out.”

 “Nate,” he tries, voice breaking under the weight of his regret. “Don’t go.”

 “I shouldn’t have--,”

 Nate looks up then, blue eyes still striking despite their resignation. “You think you’re the first to say it? Could have come up with something more original as a writer though.”

 “I wasn’t going after her,” Nate defends again ruefully instead of acknowledging the apology over Catherine. “Jenny. She was just-- she was someone who actually understood.”

 Dan doesn’t find the morbid humor funny. “I was wrong.”

 It’s not meant to be an accusation, but it still hangs in the air between them.

  Is that what you think about me and Chuck?  

“I know. I’m sorry.” Dan says genuinely, and he does know now that his anger is out of the way and he knows Jenny is safe. Nate had been the first to come to him about his little sister last year, concerned about a request for four grand, not trying to play white knight without letting her family know. Dan had been grateful, at the time, even if he hadn’t thought to say so. “I’m over protective and I have a temper, but you know why.”

 “I’m not Chuck,” Nate argues roughly, only now with narrowed eyes and grit in his voice.

 Dan isn’t sure how to word things properly-- he’s done a fucked up job so far tonight-- but he tries to tread lightly as he explains, “Of course not. But the first time you and I ever really spoke ended with you defending him the night after he assaulted her. Telling him not to fight me because I ‘wasn’t worth it’.”

 “So whether it’s fair or not, whether you’re even friends right now or not, I think I still subconsciously associated you with him when I saw you kissing her.”

 Nate looks back down.

 Dan doesn’t nod, just looks away as well, uncertain of how many emotions he’s supposed to show around male friends after a litany of female figures in his life and a musician for a father. “I still shouldn’t have said what I did.”

 “Yeah, I guess when you put it like that I’d be mad at me too.” Nate has chosen to find the organization of his shirts more interesting than it really is.

 “I am trying, Dan,” Nate sounds less deprecating or guarded now. “I don’t want to be that guy anymore.”

---------

"I don't think you were that guy to begin with," he tries to say, knowing he won't be believed. "Fuck, I'm definitely not any better."