#tho it's also... really funny that i plagued myself with something that wasn't even real?

[lorei-writes]

You know what'd be really cool? A feedback exchange project.

Now, when I say feedback, I do mean feedback -- a commentary on both the weak and the strong points of a given work.

In my experience, nearly all (if not all) fanfic writers are riddled with a certain set of doubts about their own creations. Surely, it is nice to be praised, but... In my opinion, it is also nice to receive information that something could be improved and to be given insight of what possible paths could be chosen. After all, our own perceptions of things can be warped, as we experience the world only as ourselves and are personally attached to what we make.

Hmm... Or maybe that's just me. Oh well.

[ladyseidr]

it's miserably hot so i Just Got Here but uh ke.l notes on my portrayal dump or whatever ( will contain spoilers! i was going to try to keep it mild but it, like, one hc in i realized it wasn't possible )

i do Not vibe with the idea that ke.l is the simplest character / least developed because what are we forgetting "they ignored me, hehe. . ." OR aub.rey's "i didn't realize people deal with grief in different ways" ????????

he's not a "himbo" he has ADHD and is trying his best ( and also his hea.dspace-self is literally 12 like damn give him a break fkdshflsadj )

"there are no signs that he's bothered by his brother being the golden child" we did not play the same game, but yeah no like he loves hero soooooo much but there's no way i'm looking past the whole "they ignored me" thing on top of the way he avoids his house / mother like the plague at parts. like, yes, i actually think his parents love him but his mother is fr so much like mine ( not the golden child part, everything else ) so i know what i'm talking abt kfhdsafhdslh. parents can be loving but also extremely judgmental ( or worse ), those are sadly not contradictions in my experience

i'm obv a good / true ending person, and for the record: yes he forgives sun.ny. it takes a while to fully work through it all, but he's verbally forgives him like. definitely quicker than everyone else

big big big big "i'm always there for everyone but no one's ever there for me" vibes, like i think sun.ny might be the exception, but i do think most ppl who know ke.l see his sometimes-forced confidence / happiness and silliness and just think he's fine

okay so this is probably projecting but the whole "oh he supposedly moved on really fast and started doing all these sports and making a ton of friends etc etc" thing does not read like him just "getting over it," it reads like how i cope with grief: by not coping with it. don't get me wrong, distracting yourself can sometimes be a healthy part of grief but in my case, i wouldn't let myself feel it at all and like. especially with hero suffering????? i really feel like ke.l bottled it up and tried to be strong for his brother and at some point he did or will crack

i am a big fan of ke.l visiting mar.i's grave super often hc tho

in the same vein as like, everything above, his whole "i thought i would just mess it up / make everything worse" ( i am not looking up exact quotes, bear with me ) is so. . . like i think he's literally a little fucked up from not being able to read the room / read social cues well when he was younger ( which, like, literally canonical ). like he was literally scared to reach out to his grieving friends, presumably even before the argument with hero??? all because he might make it worse????? kill me

okay okay okay okay on a lighter note: so bisexual and yes i'm gonna be honest i stand by my Has A Crush On Su.nny headcanon. i didn't choose this life, my gay ass brain chose it for me

( on that note i do still find ke.l/aubr.ey/su.nny/bas.il extremely funny. collects almost the entire friend group and hero is just like "why???????????" )

he's so extroverted i mean this is canon ( "while you were working i sat on a bench and talked to strangers!" ) but it Has to be noted. everybody is a potential friend to him. where's that one post that's like "i'm not here to make friends (big dumb smile) i'm here to make BEST friends"

loyal to a fault, protective to a fault, and full of bad ideas ( affectionate )

so touchy, physical affection is so his thing. yes this is also canon but he's a big hugger for sure

bringing up the ADHD thing again because it's so real, i was replaying the junkyard part and the whole "what were we looking for again" followed by "were we looking for something? :)" like 10 minutes later is SO funny, he's just like me for real

he saved sun.ny's life. like we do acknowledge that right. you can only get bad endings if you don't open the door to ke.l. opening the door and letting ke.l finally reconnect with sun.ny after trying so long is the only path to a good ending. sobs into my hands.

anyway