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underthebtree · 8 years ago

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Are you a worrier?

Do you find yourself getting caught up in the ‘what if’s’ and live with a general sense that something bad is going to happen?

Do you find it hard to enjoy the now because you feel fear and anxiety every day?

Do you think that this worry has a function? Serves a purpose? Or has it been a feeling or experience that you put on back burner and try to ignore, hoping that it will go away, but it is always there getting in the way of you fully enjoying the now?

I have been doing some very interesting reading of late and now I am beginning to feel like I am holding out on you as I have not shared this with you! I have alluded to it at times, but have not been writing about it specifically, and some of the research directly relates to a more powerful way of dealing with worry and anxiety so you can finally knock it on the head!

Interested? Read on!

Managing worry

So standard protocol for managing worry is to encourage you to begin to break down worry into two categories and question:

Is it a SIGNAL or is it NOISE?

If it is a signal, a real problem that you can do something about NOW, then effective problem solving is likely to have been thwarted by the repetitive thinking habit called WORRY. The problem is worried about rather than problem solved, and it therefore becomes more of a chronic problem BECAUSE resolution of problems is NOT the outcome of worry – worry only serves to keep you living in FEAR. So learning how to manage this ‘worry as a signal’ type worry is crucial if you are to really understand and overcome this toxic habit.

However, many or our worries are NOT signals, they fall into next category which is ‘worry as noise’ type worry – these are the type of worries that are either exceedingly unlikely (what if I get hit my a meteor!) or actually not HAPPENING NOW, meaning that we actually can’t take effective action on the worry right now, all we can do is just worry and hope that it doesn’t happen (or so worry would tell you!!)

So this is where it gets a bit interesting, and for me A LOT interesting as typically I would take a ‘cross that bridge if you get to it’ type approach with the noise worries – do what you can now and leave the rest – which is pretty much standard protocol therapeutically. However, standard protocol is NOT what we are about here Under the Bodhi Tree! We are looking for innovation and NEW WAYS of looking at things, to find that ‘better mousetrap’ as it were, with the overarching goal being to increase your experience of HAPPINESS, not just to experience less worry!

Upper Limiting

So here it is – what if you were to consider that when it comes to ‘worry as noise’ type worry, meaning that you have done the first step and identified that it is NOT A SIGNAL (very important!!), that you were to consider this noise type of worry is actually a form of

SELF-SABOTAGE.

What if this type of worry is a form of self-sabotage that limits your capacity to experience ever increasing GOOD in your life?

What if the intention behind this type of worry was to keep you playing small in your life, by keeping you living in fear even when there is nothing real to fear, but you are in known territory and this tells your brain that you are safe?

What if this type of worry is actually an UPPER LIMIT PROBLEM – a habit that puts restrictions on the amount of HAPPINESS that you will allow into your life?

What if this type of worry is actually just your nervous systems habit, it says: life feels like this, and if it starts to feel any DIFFERENT (which includes happiness!) then it can trigger WORRY- which then brings you back down to your base level of happiness – what is known and familiar, even if it is miserable and fearful!

So what does this mean in real terms?

It would mean being prepared to consider that the problem worry is throwing up to you is actually a smoke screen and is NOT the real problem at all. You would need to be prepared to let this initial problem GO in order to OPEN UP to the GOOD that is actually underneath and is being sabotaged or blocked. It would mean being open to the possible GOOD that is there and being blocked by the habit of worry. This type of self-sabotage could sound like

Hang on a minute, life is too good, there are no worries, oh no!!

Or it may even be more subtle that this and may be like

Yippee, I have that new job, relationship, house etc, now I really do have something to worry about!

These thoughts are obviously not deliberate, and they may not even be conscious thoughts, but they likely UNDERPIN what is happening to fuel this type of worry because we are hard wired to love the familiar, even if that familiarity is uncomfortable and unhappy! Any change, even change for the BETTER, change that would allow us to feel ever increasing HAPPINESS, will be sabotaged if you are not watching CAREFULLY and questioning:

Is this a signal or noise?

And then doing something constructive with either option!

Worries as signals: there is a threat and we can problem solve these worries and put them to bed.

Worries as noise - Question: What is the possible GOOD THING underneath this worry, the good that worry is currently blocking me from seeing and allowing, that if I were to allow myself to FOCUS on this aspect then my life then things really could change for the better!!??

Overcoming Worry

What I love about this new theory is that it accounts for both sides of the worry equation which I don’t think has been answered sufficiently before! In this way you really can begin to work past your UPPER LIMIT threshold for HAPPINESS, and begin to allow more of it into your life, where chronic worry can become a thing of the past!

Sounds totally in alignment with our mission here Under the Bodhi Tree, and I hope that it is for you too!

Remember, that Bodhi starts with you!

Toni-Anne

PS: Want to know more about overcoming worry and working past your Upper Limit habits that keep you playing small in your life!? Stay tuned as there is more of this is coming soon!!!

PPS: If you love what you have read and want to know more, please like us on Facebook or follow us on Twitter, Instagram or Tumblr. If you never want to miss a blog post and you want to be kept informed of all our latest updates and courses you can also decide now to

Disclaimer: This information is in no way intended to replace psychological treatment should you be suffering from clinical depression and anxiety and be in need of personalised, individual therapy. This information can be used as an adjunct to your therapy and you can feel free to raise it with your therapist should you have one. If you are in any way suicidal, please contact your therapist or emergency support services.

#worry #upperlimitproblem

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