#ur being stuffed into crust

[undermine-the-instinct]

Good morning happy pillage day people pls remember that America is the colonizer and oppressor and rapist and murderer. 'Thanksgiving is about remembering and appreciating the things we're grateful for--' that's everyday. Literally. You can and should do that every day. Or do you not live?

[that-one-pretty-bitch]

Hii ur moodboards are so pretty!! and if don't mind then can i request a gallan x mitsuri like reader if u don't know her then she is from demon Slayer u can research it.u can ignore this request if u want to (⁠ ⁠╹⁠▽⁠╹⁠ ⁠).

𝑀𝒾𝓉𝓈𝓊𝓇𝒾 𝒾𝓈 𝒮𝒰𝒞𝐻 𝒶 𝓈𝓌𝑒𝑒𝓉𝒽𝑒𝒶𝓇𝓉!! 𝒫𝑒𝓇𝓈𝑜𝓃𝒶𝓁𝓁𝓎, 𝐼 𝒷𝑒𝓁𝒾𝑒𝓋𝑒 𝒶𝓃 𝒽𝑒𝓇 𝒶𝑒𝓈𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓉𝒾𝒸 𝓌𝑜𝓊𝓁𝒹 𝒷𝑒 𝒶 𝓂𝒾𝓍 𝑜𝒻 𝒸𝑜𝓆𝓊𝑒𝓉𝓉𝑒 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝓀𝒶𝓌𝒶𝒾𝒾  but 𝒢𝒶𝓁𝓁𝒽𝒶𝓃??? 𝒯𝓌𝑜 𝓈𝓌𝑒𝑒𝓉𝒽𝑒𝒶𝓇𝓉𝓈?? 𝑀𝓎 𝑔𝑜𝒹, 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝓈𝓅𝑜𝒾𝓁𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒯𝒾𝒶 𝓌𝒾𝓉𝒽 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒷𝑒𝓈𝓉 𝓅𝒶𝓇𝑒𝓃𝓉𝓈 𝑒𝓋𝑒𝓇!

****NOTICE: I’m not from India so I’m really sorry if I got something wrong please just let me know, I will correct myself.*********

♡ I’m pretty sure that Mitsuri is Japanese and Gallahan is Indian?? I’m not sure but I headcanon from the clothing and headpieces they wear that they are a powerful family in India.

♡ You first met Gallahan when you were traveling to India, you just got a break from work and decided to visit India because they had gorgeous clothing and jewelry. So you went to India on vacation basically for a shopping spree.

♡ Upon first reaching the country you noticed that their street food was delicious. You had a plate of pani puri. It was thin crust fried with stuffed spicy and sweet water in it, it was topped off with potatoes and chickpeas. Being the food that you were, you were enjoying yourself to the most after having a paneer kabab. Everything in India was so bright and colorful. 

♡ Then you saw something that upset you, a child was on the floor bruised up, it seemed as if she had no home. You helped her off the ground and offered to get her something to eat, after all it really was the least you could do for the small girl. You handed her a kebab stick and offered to get her more, after all you knew for a fact one kebab stick really wouldn’t do it for you.

♡ You were wearing a beautiful pink kimono, which made people instantly know that you were a visitor from a foregin country. Around this time Gallahan had left the estate with Tia because his daughter wanted to spend some time with him. He bought anything that Tia showed even the slightest interest in.

♡ As he was busy buying a small plushie that had caught Florentia’s eyes, Florentia saw a pretty woman with pink hair and ran towards her. She wore strange clothes, not something anyone here would wear. Running up to the kind lady Florentia tripped only to be caught in the arms of the pretty lady. She was even more cute up close. 

♡ “Are you alright?” Y/n asked the girl

   “ Yes!” Florentia absentmindedly brought her hand to the girls hair and began messing with it

   “I like your hair miss, they are very pretty,” She smile

She truly was very mature for a child

  “ Ah, thank you,” You laughed shyly

♡ Meanwhile Gallahan was having a breakdown, he lost his only daughter. God knows what could have happened to her!! He dashed around the bazaar questioning everyone he came across if they had seen his daughter but he had no luck. 

♡ He sprinted across from one shop to another in the hopes of finding his daughter but then he saw Florentia in front of a pretty foregin woman. The woman was giving Florentia what seemed to be foreign food. Sakura mochi, if he remembered correctly. He had told Florentia to not take food from strangers!

♡ Walking towards both his daughter and the delightful woman, 

“I apologize if she bothered you, miss,” Gallahan laughed nervously, he was so cute. Like father like daughter, you wanted to pinch his cheeks, squealing slightly as the handsome man got closer to you.

“No, no, not at all your daughter is so sweet, you must be a wonderful father!” Y/n smiled

This foregin lady was very kind, he liked you. The both of you had just met but you seemed like a great person, perhaps he could be your friend.

♡ You offered to take Florentia back to the palace with him and he agreed, genuinely wanting to spend more time with you. Florentia saw the bright smile on both of your faces as the two of you talked to each other and immediately shipped it. I mean, having you as her mom and her father as her father she would be drowning in love.

♡ Eventually Gallahan fell in love with you and visa versa, you both had similar interests and showed the same passion about protecting Florentia, so why wouldn’t he fall for you? You were always so kind and sweet, in his eyes you were an angel and in yours he was an angel.

♡ The both of you didn’t go on dates too much, you simply hung around each other and didn’t mind if Florentia came or any of his relatives came.

♡ A nice date would be when the two of you brought him some dango and the two of you were eating it together under a tree while discussing cute things that happened to the both of you. Gallahan would share a lot about his life with you, while you would also share a lot about your life back in Japan and then the both of you would just cloudgaze, stare at clouds and whatever cloud looks like something you would point it out.

♡ You both had asked Florentia to join for the picnic but she refused seeing that this might be an opportunity for the two of you to be able to go on a date. She lied about having something to do and walked away. While Gallahan shyly asked if you wanted to go with him alone. You were also very shy so you blushed and agreed. That was your first date.

♡ He literally married you 2 months after dating, because he knew you were the one for him and Florentia was SO happy when she found out that you would officially be her step-mother. She hugged the both of you and you were a cute lovely family.

♡ Gallahan often does Florentia’s hair, so now that he has you he does you hair too. Isn’t that just the cutest thing ever?

♡ He spoils you way too much with food!! Whenever you go out he buys you every food he thinks you might like!!

♡ You once gave him a flower crown made by you and he gave you the most adorable smile in the entire universe. He attempted to make one for you too but failed miserably, you had to console him saying it was okay.

♡ He addresses you as darling or dear. While you call him honey and Florentia munchkin, she constantly tells you to stop calling her that because it's embarrassing but you don’t stop.

♡ He gives you and Tia many headpats!! No, it doesn’t matter if you are his wife!! *HEADPAT*

♡ Very nervous about holding your hand or anything romantic even though you both married, your also quite nervous but you both manage in the end 

♡ His favorite place to kiss you is your cheek and his favorite place to be kissed is his nose.

♡ So respectful?? Like if he accidently walked in on you changing he would apologize for the next two weeks and do everything for you as an apology and you would have to reassure him that everything is okay and you're not upset with him!!

♡ When you try to feed him a dish you made he gets very blushy and fiddles with his fingers looking away.

♡ Your bright smile is his favorite thing about you, it doesn’t matter if you look like an idiot smiling, he. Loves. That.

♡ Your first kiss was literally, 3 months after being married. You both were so shy but eventually did it.

[mollyonpluto]

stuff i’m working out that i like or dislike as i live alone: (spanish edition below)

- vicks vaporub and some cold and flu medication when sick is infinitely better than just using paracetamol. (and hot tea!!!)

- mouthwash is super important, as is brushing teeth twice a day DAILY (throwback to the wisdom tooth incident)

- easy skincare: cerave or cetaphil face wash and simple moisturiser and eye cream is realistically all you need, inexpensive and works really well

- supplements because realistically with a university diet you’re not gonna be getting all the nutrients your body needs. iron supplements help with tiredness when anaemic, vitamin d if you play sports for bones and joints

- essential oils/pillow spray + brown noise or rain sounds from youtube = the perfect nights sleep (especially in noisy uni halls)

- instead of buying dominos pizza, buy the £6 tesco pizza deals with a side dip and pizza. it’s stuffed crust and actually really good, it’ll save you so much money as a student

- a big water bottle; im talking like 2 litres. it just makes you want to drink water because you’re carrying it around all day and staying hydrated actually makes a massive difference

- it is so important to continue your hobbies or things that bring you joy!!! having time to play games every day literally keeps me sane, as does playing sports! don’t underestimate the importance of hobbies

- HOT WATER BOTTLE. when the weather is cold, when you’re on your period, whatever. it just makes you feel more comfortable. the heat is so comforting

- AN AIRFRYER IS UR BEST FRIEND FOR COOKING AT UNIVERSITY <3 you can literally cook entire meals in 10 minutes and it’s easy to clean. will save ur life

- lofi music helps make doing anything peaceful and podcasts really help you get out of your own head if you’re an overthinker (the more silly they are the better!) ones abt life are good and all but realistically it’s gonna make you overthink more. i recommend under the influence podcast, it’s a gem

- engaging in shit that tests your brain every day is really important, but there’s a balance to that. do the fucking wordle it’s a great 10 mins of daily trivia and makes life more interesting

- HAVE A ROUTINE AND STICK TO IT!!! it helps you think that you’ve got your life tgt (tbh you have), and if people don’t stick around in your life forever, hobbies/routine/your degree will!!!! find some permanence within yourself

- having a little plant to look after makes life so much more interesting and bearable when times get tough

- GO TO UR CLASSES IF YOU CAN. please for the love of god it’s so important, yes you can catch up at home but being in a lecture is so much better for focus. higher attendance has a positive correlation to higher grades!!!

-

spain edition:

- COLACAO ON A HOT DAY IS THE BEST. literally fucking ELITE.

- do not underestimate the power of mosquito repellent and some cream for after you inevitably get bitten. it works WONDERS.

- alleoli goes with everything

- ALWAYS keep a water bottle on you no matter where you go bc the spanish sun WILL dehydrate you. and most places in spain (including small villages and parks as well as cities) have water bottle refilling stations so USE IT.

- keep some photos from home on your wall and schedule a regular call with someone from home, really helps home sickness and the scary side of moving abroad on your own

- kiss peoples cheeks when you meet them. it’s not weird, that’s just europe. it’s only awkward if you make it, trust me. (you’ll get used to it!)

[luveline]

never have i ever seen another person write peter as beautifully as you do 😩 im obssesed!!!! can we get more drunk + clingy tasm peter whenever u get the chance 🙏🏼

thank u! + tysm for ur request <3

You're a little bit tipsy. This is fine, except Peter is wasted. 

You're trying to put your hand up to hail a cab and Peter keeps pulling it back down to hold it. Both hands in yours, Peter wobbles beside you on the wet sidewalk, useless in his state but making up for it in an adorable fashion.

"You smell nice," he says, face leaning heavily into your chest, fingers squeezing yours. "I loooooove this perfume." 

"That's good, you got it for me," you tell him, resigning yourself to being a human lamppost for the time being. 

"I know," he replies. "'Cos you used to wear it when we first met, and I had to go around like five places to find it again. They sprayed so much perfume on me I smelled like a department store for a week." 

You laugh, your chest burning; you've never heard that story before. 

"You could've asked me." 

He shakes his head into your jacket before standing at his full height, eyes darkening, expression mischievous.  

"It was a surprise," he whispers like it's a secret. 

Something goes all soft on his face and he lets go of your hands. You think, good, maybe I can hail a cab now. Peter doesn't let you, as he's only let go of your hands so he can throw his arms around your shoulders and pull your face into his chest roughly, mumbling as he rubs his cheek into the top of your head. 

"You're the love of my life," he says quietly. His intoxication gives his words a heavy weighting, love sounding all jumped up and emphasised.

You wonder if there's steam coming out of your ears, you're so hot. "You're mine," you tell him seriously, hands crawling up his sides, across his back. 

"Yeah?" he asks. 

"Uh-huh." 

Peter seems pleased with this. He makes a sound in the back of his throat, a sigh or a hiccup or something that sounds exuberantly pleased as he squeezes you half to death. 

"I'm so lucky." His hands are grasping at you like you're falling out of his arms. 

"Peter, shush," you beg. 

"Whatever, loser," he says cheerily. "You wanna go get some pizza?" 

"I wanna go home." 

"After pizza, babe, c'mon." 

You're maybe a bit more tipsy than you originally thought because suddenly being the responsible one feels boring, and the drunken love of your life wants pizza. 

"Yeah, okay. Can we get stuffed crust?" 

Peter pulls back and kisses you, a little wonky but the thought counts. He tastes like a mini bar. "We can get everything you want, my darling. My sweetheart, my angel, my baby, my…" 

He calls you sweet pet names all the way to the pizza place. 

[yijaesang]

[text] ALSKJDFNLSJNDSAJD JAESANG STOP I LOVE THAT VIDEO SO MUCH U KNO I DO I READ IT IN HER VOICE I HATE U

[text] omg a crop top SCANDALOUS. do it

[text] but not if u know you'll see momo she'll make you change u kno 😰😰😰

[text] i may be bold but i'm not that bold quite yet 👀👀👀

[text] I might paint my nails though cos last weekend was so much FUN and i want to go all out for the last weekend...imagine if i find that polish that GLOWS IN THE DARK 🤩🤩🤩

[text] do you want yours done too? if it doesn't clash with your fits 🤔🤔🤔

[text] jaesang wtf is odd about being happy and excited?? man. you sound like a robot. 😥😥😥

[text] I mean i get it cos all we do is work all the time and this is like one of the first times we just let ourselves hang out and do our thing but this isn't the last time it's ever gonna happen yakno?

[text] WYM YOU KNOW SUSU PROUD OF YOU IM THE ONE WHO DID U A SOLID AND DIDN'T CALL U BIG BIRD COS OF UR CUTE YELLOW FLUFFY SWEATER LAST WEEK MADE U LOOK LIKE U WALKED RIGHT OFF SEASAME STREET.

[text] also are you forreal can i bring my cards i really wanna but i've also been so good this weekend 🥺🥺🥺

[text] some guy had a WHOLE HUNDRED JUST HANGING OUT OF HIS POCKET and i Had 2 Pretend I Did Not See

[text] 100, that's six stuffed crust pizzas from pizza hut yakno

「 text 」 : with the amount of times you've quoted it or shared it, I'm amazed it's not tattooed on your body

「 text 」 : I'll wear a hoodie or jacket over it if we go there 😂 she'd call me a hussy or something and hit me with bundles of chopsticks again

「 text 」 : we can break into naraes stuff, she's got ton of polish. we'll do them here together

「 text 」 : because while I'm happy at times, I never have much to get this level of excited about for myself. if I'm a robot so are you. You work just as many hours

「 text 」 : i hope it's not the last. We need more of it.

「 text 」 : I WOULD SJOW YOU OSCAR THE GROUCH AND DECK YOUR ASS IF YIU HAD I LOOKED C U T E

「 text 」 : did you see my shoulder? i was a total slut on stage wasn't I :/

「 text 」 : im serious. This crowd is perfect for it even if it's not to hustle. People love card tricks and you'll have fun showing off.

「 text 」 : well that's your own damn fault we don't have six stuffed crust pizzas from pizza hut now isn't it

[flawlesspeasant]

Hi! this might be really random but i used to love ur jolex au's with lyla and alex. a question I always had about them is what was jo and alex's relationship with they first had lyla? were they in a good place? or was there drama at the time when jo was pregnant w/ lyla? do u have a fic of lyla's birth? i can't remember if u did or not? if so can u post it, if not its cool:)

hello :) the question is a little random but i love it! i love it when people still remember that little universe and hear that people were attached to the jolex kids! i think it’s so cute! anyway, when jo and alex first had lyla, they were in a pretty decent place. jo was starting her fellowship and alex was still chief of peds. they were newlyweds and still in the honeymoon stage, married for less than a year when jo got pregnant.

i really thought i had written a story about lyla’s birth, but i searched my old documents and can’t seem to find it so maybe i never did write one? if i stumble across it, i’ll post it but i really can’t find it right now. the closest thing i found is an old fic of jo holding lyla and getting emotional when she is two weeks old because she thinks about being left at the fire station that young.

————————

When her feet touched down on the fuzzy, soft fleece rug beside her and Alex’s bed, Jo felt the bones in her legs shift and crack. Her mouth opened and she uttered a loud, voracious yawn before rubbing her eyes with the backs of her hands and stretching out her arms. Her eyes flickered to the clock on the bedside alarm clock and she sighed when she saw that it was only a measly 7:30 in the morning. She exhaled sharply, blowing air through her nose, and eventually stood up.

She wasn't surprised when she saw that the other side of the bed was empty. Alex’s shift started at 8:15, so it made sense that he was already up and moving for the day. Slowly, she dragged her very tired feet over to her laundry basket and leaned down to grab the pair of pajama pants she wore last night off the top. It had been two weeks. Two weeks since she had gotten proper rest, two weeks since she fell asleep at a decent hour and two weeks that she had been living like a zombie. Two weeks and she still wasn't on a schedule. She didn't want to admit it to anyone, much less herself, but she doubted that it’d ever happen. If the baby wasn't on a schedule yet, she probably never would get on one.

Jo shoved her legs through the holes of her pants and tied the drawstrings around her waist as she walked towards the bathroom, all the while tugging her chest-length brunette hair up into a leisurely ponytail. Each time she yanked her hair up, she reminded herself to never cut it again. Growing it out was too much of a hassle. She cut it way back when she was still a resident and now, two-almost-three years later, it still wasn't back to its original length. Picking the sleep-induced crust from the corners of her eyes, she yawned again as she rounded the corner into the bathroom, which was already illuminated and occupied by Alex.

Alex stood at the sink feverishly darting a toothbrush in and out of his mouth while the foamy toothpaste trickled out the sides. He hardly noticed Jo when she eased into the bathroom behind him, going immediately to the toilet. When he did notice her, she was sitting on it and releasing her bladder. He rinsed his mouth, shut off the spigot and looked at her.

“Rough morning already?”

Jo looked up at him with a tired expression and just weakly nodded her head. She didn't like admitting to him exactly how tired she was but dammit, she couldn't lie. Alex secretly reveled in her being tired because well...Jo being tired meant he was right and Jo hated when he would look at her with that smug little “I told you so” look. He tried to warn her months ago just how tiring newborn babies could be. So she didn't listen to him? Big deal. In hindsight though, she was really starting to wish she had taken him a little more seriously.

She wiped herself, got up off the toilet, flushed and bumped Alex out of the way so she could wash her hands. Alex hung the small towelette back up on the rack and leaned in. He pressed his lips to Jo’s cheek and grinned.

“I'll go get her up for you,” he offered and turned to leave the bathroom, already dressed and ready for work.

“Just make her bottle,” Jo murmured back as she dried her hands on the same towelette he just hung up. “I'll get her.”

“Got it,” Alex nodded and padded down the hallway.

Truthfully, she envied him. She envied the way he didn't have to get up at ungodly hours of the morning for feedings because he got to go to work. And she secretly despised the fact that he didn't really need to be up right now. He could've slept in for another 20 minutes and still made it in time for work. The fact of the matter was that Alex didn't want to sleep in. He didn't want to spend extra time sleeping in the morning when he could get up half an hour earlier and have time to spend in the rocking chair, staring at his little girl. Jo wanted to slap him for taking sleeping in for granted but quite honestly, there was no other way Alex wanted to spend his time. He would rather miss out on half an hour of sleep just to have ten uninterrupted minutes holding and kissing his girl. It always made his day so much better. Secretly though? Jo loved him a little more each time she found that he’d woken up earlier just to spend time with their baby.

Once she left the bathroom, Jo dragged her still-tired feet down the long hallway and quietly opened up the nursery door. She was still getting used to having the nursery. For one, it was still weird having an extra bedroom in the loft. When she was four months pregnant, Alex had hired carpenters to install carpet and put up walls and a door to make a bedroom for their baby and it still weirded Jo out just a little to know that their was a bedroom in the loft, for one. And for two, it was still crazy to think that a baby--their baby--was behind the door.

Inside the nursery, it was dead silent and nearly completely dark with the only light spilling through the closed blinds hung in front of the window. Jo tiptoed over to the white wooden crib and placed her hands on the top bar. Before she even disturbed her though, she looked inside. And dammit, every time she did, she couldn't help but smile.

The bedding was light pink with white polka dots and around the perimeter, the crib was padded with soft Minnie Mouse themed lining. A loose, light purple, cotton blanket was the only one inside the crib since it was the middle of summertime and almost swallowed up in the sea of blankets, bedding and plush stuffed animals, a tiny little body lie.

Jo leaned down and oh-so carefully, she wrapped her arms around the tiny baby’s torso. Softly, the baby grunted at being disturbed but quickly rested once her head hit her Mommy’s chest. Naturally, Jo rested her baby’s body against her chest and supported her by bracing her hands underneath her tiny backside. It was her most favorite way to be held. She loved the immediate contact and the sound of Mommy’s heartbeat when her head was in the middle of her chest and the rest of her body was tucked away in Mommy’s arms.

“Good morning. I missed you. Yeah, I did… Mommy missed you so much.” Without hesitation, Jo tilted her head downward and planted a kiss right on the baby’s lips. “You wanna go eat? Huh? You want some breakfast? Okay… Let's go see what Daddy made you for breakfast.”

She walked slowly as she carried the baby back to the kitchen and living room. As soon as Alex caught a glimpse of Jo holding her in the doorway, he immediately put the bottle he was shaking down on the counter and approached Jo with his arms out, ready to take her. He anxiously glanced at the clock and grunted. He had fifteen minutes before he had to leave but that wasn't nearly enough. He wanted so much more time.

“Gimme,” he mumbled and gently but eagerly took the baby out of Jo’s arms. “Morning gorgeous,” he whispered to her and pressed his lips gingerly to her tiny little chubby cheek. He situated her in his arms like a seasoned professional and stared down at her like he usually did. He loved staring at her and watching her sleep. Each time he looked at her, there was something new. Something that he’d never seen before. Yesterday he noticed the freckle by her hairline, the day before that was the slight dimple in her chin. Each day, she got more and more beautiful. “Her hair’s different today,” he observed as he took her hand into his and rubbed it. “It's… It's lighter.”

“You think?” Jo raised her eyebrows even though she was over at the sink running hot water along the outside of the bottle to keep it warm. “It was looking pretty brown yesterday.”

“No, it's definitely lighter today. She's gonna be blonde,” Alex said with confidence as he pressed his lips to the palm of her hand. In his arms, she squirmed a little and her tiny face cracked up as her feet began to rub against one another. “Shh shhh shhh shhh,” he hushed her. “It's alright… Daddy’s gotcha.”

“You wanna feed her?” Jo asked as she approached the two of them again, still wiping off the bottle. “It'll give me some time to grab her a new diaper and stuff if you do.”

“Yeah I'll do it.” Alex took the bottle from Jo’s hand and walked with it, over to the couch. He sat down slowly and like he’d been doing it his whole life, he eased the bottle’s nipple into her mouth and held it there for her to suck. He truly was a natural at it. It was just something so easy and natural for him. It was almost as if he was born to do it. “There we go. That's all better, isn't it?”

While she sucked, the baby’s eyes slowly parted and they popped open. Her glassy blue/green eyes roamed a bit but eventually, they fixated on him and she looked directly at him while she sucked.

“Still blue,” he mumbled to himself, smiling before he spoke up. “Hey Jo, her eyes are still blue.”

Jo returned from the nursery with a diaper and a package of wipes in tow. She smirked and plopped down on the couch next to them to see for herself. Gently, she pressed her fingertip to the corner of her baby’s eye and cleaned out an eye booger. “They are still blue, huh? I don't know where the hell she came from. I’m starting to think she's not really my baby.”

“She's yours. It's all in the face. The nose, the eye shape, that forehead and those big-ass ears. All you,” Alex teased and Jo swatted him. “But she's a Karev. Got Amber’s blonde hair and Mom’s blue eyes… That's that Karev in her.”

“I had a blonde baby,” Jo snickered. “Me… Jo Wilson… Brunette hair, brown eyes… Produced a baby with blonde hair and blue eyes. What the hell is that?”

“Eh if she's anything like Amb, she won't be too blonde. It'll be borderline brown but blonde. Like a gold kind of color. And she won't have bright blue eyes… They'll be a little green too.” Alex just stared and grinned. “She's pretty.”

“She's beautiful,” Jo agreed. “Lyla… Lyla. Look at Mommy, baby. Look at Mommy.” Jo held her hand and kissed it. “...Can you believe it's been two weeks? She's two weeks old exactly today.”

Reluctantly, Alex pressed his lips to her forehead and sighed once he realized that it was time for him to get up and head to work. Since it was empty, he eased the bottle out of Lyla’s mouth and caught the excess milk she pushed out with the fabric of her sleeper. Despite the milk on her lips, he kissed them and graciously handed her off to Jo.

“There you go,” he mumbled. “She's fat, full and dusted eight ounces of boob juice. I've gotta go now though.”

“Alright,” Jo nodded and immediately placed Lyla on her shoulder so she could be burped. For as much as she worried about it while she was pregnant, Jo truly did turn into the idyllic mother. Everything she did was natural but at times, like last week at her check-up when she took her outside without socks on, she was a little bit clueless on what to do with a baby. She was getting the hang of it though. She was a quick learner. “Have a nice first day back. Call me on your lunch hour.”

“I will,” Alex promised and without another word, he disappeared out the door.

Now alone, Jo continued to rub and pat her baby’s back but she looked around the loft and sighed. It was his first day back. Ergo, it was the first time in two weeks that she’d be alone all day with the baby. She wouldn't admit it to Alex but now that she was alone, she could say it. She, was nervous and a little bit scared. Alex always knew what to do. He was so much better at this whole parenting thing than she was. If Lyla was crying, he automatically knew what it was that she wanted. He had been her backbone for two whole weeks and now…

She took a deep breath and relaxed. I can do this, she thought to herself. She carefully took Lyla off of her shoulder and immediately smiled once she saw that her eyes were still wide open.

“Hello!” she crooned in a sweet little baby voice. “Hi beautiful. Hi. It's just you and me today, yep. Just you and Mama. We’ll have a girl’s day, okay? We’ll stay up real late, paint our toenails… Talk about boys…” She gently laid Lyla down on the couch in front of her and undid her onesie buttons. “...I'm a little clueless, okay? I'm not as good as Daddy. But I promise I'll get it together. And we’ll have lots and lots of fun together, okay?”

Lyla just looked at her with an expressionless face. She kicked her feet a little and brought her fists up to her mouth, which made Jo laugh as she took her diaper off.

“You can't still be hungry. You're such a fatty.” Jo leaned over and swept a pacifier up off the coffee table. She stuck it in her own mouth for a moment before putting it in her daughter’s. “Here, take that.”

With the baby quiet and content, Jo relaxed and changed her diaper with ease. Admittedly, she was horrible at this at first. She’d put the diapers on backwards, put the diapers on too loose. Lyla’s buttcheek would be hanging out the bottom or she’d pee right through it because it was on crooked. These days, Jo was better though. She changed a nearly flawless diaper each time. Once she was fully clean, Jo scooped her back up, set the soiled diaper on the coffee table and situated herself to be comfortable on the couch.

“You wanna watch TV with me? Let's watch… I dunno, let's watch Rachael Ray. And you can look at all the stuff your Mommy will never be able to cook for you.”

Jo turned the TV on and let whatever channel it was already on play. With Lyla on her chest, she combed her fingers through her light brown hair with one hand and used the other to pat her butt. Lyla closed her eyes and sucked on her pacifier and listened to Jo’s heartbeat until she was on her way back to sleep.

Subconsciously, Jo’s thoughts were reeling and she remained blankly staring at the television screen whilst her mind was moving at a thousand miles a minute. Today felt… Weird. Today was different. And she knew exactly why.

Today, her sweet little Lyla was two weeks old.

And in this two weeks, she watched her baby go from a bloody mess with matted, slick wavy hair to a cream-skinned, chubby cheeked beauty with fluffy light brown hair. She watched her hands turn from a haunting shade of blue to the usual shade of blotchy red and Caucasian skin. She watched her eyes go from a glossy shade of gray to a haunting shade of blue. She watched her umbilical stump dry up and fall off, watched her become more familiar with her and Alex’s voices and watched her grow and change each time she was fortunate enough to get her to latch onto her breast for a feeding.

And now today… She was holding her on her chest and she couldn't imagine her life any other way. She couldn't imagine this… This bond being broken. It was incredible. It was unfathomable. The way she felt so connected to this tiny lump of flesh, blood, bones and hair. The way she would easily lie down and take a bullet through the brain for this person. The way she never felt something so strong. The kind of love she didn't even know existed until she met this little person. It was incredible. And today… Today was the first time that she just didn't understand.

In her entire 31 years of being alive, she had lost count exactly how many times she told herself and others that she didn't understand. Didn't understand how one child could have two parents that didn't love it. How a mother couldn't love their baby. How a mother could just leave. She told herself and others countless times that she just didn't understand.

But now, she really didn't understand. How could someone feel this and let it go? How could someone look into innocent little eyes and not feel so much love? How could someone just make the conscious decision to leave their child? And worse yet, go through with it? How could someone just...not care?

She couldn't imagine that. She couldn't imagine Lyla not being on her chest. After carrying her for nine months? After watching her body stretch and grow to accommodate this blonde-haired, blue-eyed beauty? After twelve grueling hours of labor? After feeling the doctors rubbing her dry on her chest? After watching Alex clamp and cut her umbilical cord himself? After looking into her pair of tiny little eyes and know that everything she ever did and ever will be affects her?

She was this small once.

Once upon a time, there was a little baby Jo Wilson. And at two weeks old, she wasn't snuggling and sleeping peacefully on her Mommy’s chest. No, at two weeks old, she was shivering. She was crying. In the middle of the night. In a stroller. With a blanket. Abandoned, discarded, unloved. That was her life at two weeks old. And for the first time in her entire life, she truly didn't understand.

With a single salty tear now rolling down her cheek, Jo pulled herself out of her thoughts and wiped it away with the back of her hand. She looked down at her chest, only to find that Lyla was now fast asleep and content to be so on her chest. And she smiled. Because her daughter wasn't her. Her daughter wasn't in a stroller next to a dumpster outside of a fire station abandoned and left to the wolves at two weeks old. No. At two weeks old, her own daughter was on her chest and that's where she would stay. For the remainder of the day, her daughter would stay right on her chest like this.

“I love you,” she whispered as she pressed her lips to the top of Lyla’s fluffy patch of hair. “So much.”

[boymeetsweevil]

BTS as (weird) babies in your daycare

Kim Seokjin

The oldest of the bunch

brings two designer brand lunchboxes in to school

his lunches cost more than yours do

he eats all his food and then will go around the lunch table asking the others for small bites of their meal and they usually give in to him because he shouts “but we’re BROTHERS >:O” if they say no the first time around

the one that likes to take you by the hand while you’re in the middle of paperwork or something and bring you to see that castle he was working on

you compliment him on it and then you’re dismissed like:

“Wow jin that’s a great castle you did a great job stacking the blocks”

“Thank you teacher can you leave now?”

And you go back to your paperwork feeling kind of small before you remember that you are more than a decade older than the tiny child that sent you away

not the bossiest child (that’s jimin) but is a close second

is the most catalogue looking child you’ve ever seen

when you’re bored in the classroom during naptime and you play with your phone, he’s the one who only slept for 20 minutes

he then proceeds to come over and sit in your lap for a chance to play with your phone

You open up snapchat and play with the filters with him in the dimmed playroom and listen to his little chime-like giggles

his selfies are 80x cuter than yours before the filters and when the little dog ears come out to play you have no chance

Always brags about his older brother being able to use shoes “with no velcRO and long LONG lOng stringlaces” (=shoelaces)

hoseok always yells back that there’s no such thing as shoes without velcro “unless youre a growned-up and your hyung isn’t a growned-up i saw him at the park hes just a kid too!!”

Always brings in crafts that he made with his au pair for the class

currently has an obsession with hearts so he has been bringing in crudely cut heart shaped cut outs with scribbly stick figures on them

everyone got one, even you

he also made sure to draw himself into everyone’s heart as well

in the one he made for you its clear he drew himself first because he’s normal sized and you’re gigantic and bending horrifically around the edge of the heart because he didn’t plan the spacing well 

Also brings in the best group snacks when its a holiday or his birthday

cries when you tell him its not okay to sit on the other boys when they bother him

Always wants to be your helper and repeat what you just said to the class like he’s your assistant he is SUCH a teacher’s pet

“can i be teacher jinnie?”

“ummmmmm...not right now, maybe later okay?”

“oh...When im bigger???”

“uh Yes! when youre bigger”

“okay....Teacher im bigger now”

gives you wet cheek kisses :’)

He has the CUTEST laugh and when he laughs you laugh because its one of those rolling baby laughs that just doesn’t stop and you find yourself chasing him around the playroom to hear his giggle even though your feet hurt

drinks more milk than anyone in the class

as a result he has the NASTIEST farts

Min Yoongi

The one who has been coming the longest but still takes a good 45 minutes to stop sulking after being dropped off before he’s in the mood to play

will legit stand by the window to watch his mom drop him off every fucking morning like he doesn’t know where she’s going and if she’s coming back

when you come over to see if he’ll play with the other kids, he just turns and pouts at you and whines a little and turns back to the window

When he’s not in a funk though he is the most mature kiddo

Plays the best by himself, and is very simply entertained

brought in some homemade maracas for his show and tell day

it was literally just a recycled cardboard container with dried beans in it that he had scribbled all over with 40 different markers

keeps calling it “makaka”, you try not to laugh you fail

he just sat on the edge of the rug in the playroom and shook the box of beans softly to himself for an hour

when the shaking stopped you came over to see if he was alright and you realize he fell asleep

is surprisingly chatty

probably has the best vocabulary or is tied with joon

but also probably ahead of joon in terms of working vocab because while joon knows how to use “extraordinary” he also can’t grasp what the slide is called and yoongi has him beat there

ALWAYS FALLS ASLEEP first

sometimes will ask if he can start nap time early and drags the pillow and blanket the parents bring in from home up to your desk to make a more convincing argument

is always patient zero and gets fevers really easliy

when that happens you have to carry him around while you putter through the classroom and rub his back while he sleeps it off

you have to shush the other kids while he sleeps because theyre always so loud when they ask “Is Yoongi SICK???? :(”

he sleeps in your lap during nap time on those days and you stroke his fat fever-rosy cheeks when he whines in his sleep from the heat

cries whenever taehyung says his drawings are ugly

but they are, especially if he draws you 

theres always this weird expression on your face and sometimes you think about it when youre up late at night and then you cant sleep

is full of full facts about insects because his dad reads about them before bed

and is apparently always at the library

you saw him there once and he almost exploded because what are you doing outside the school

“teacher what are you going here”

“i came to get some books just like you”

“but i thought you couldn’t leave the school”

“i can leave the school...”

“wont you get a time out?”

“um no sweetie”

Yoongi has a huge sweet tooth and gets super excited on fridays when his mom packs him like chocolate milk or something 

can never open the little carton so he brings it to you and just vibrate next to you until you poke the straw in

pretty sure you saw his eyes roll into the back of his head once while drinking it

has fallen asleep with the carton in his hands on multiple occasions

HAS THE SWEETEST BABY LISP YOU’VE EVER HEARD

when you bring your guitar in for music days he sits at the front and listens SUPER intently and always tries to come over and touch it while you’re playing so have to be like

“yoongi, sweetie, please sit down”

“um okay. teacher ? im gonna play the giddar too okay?”

“while I’m playing it?”

“Yeah :)”

“no yoongi.”

“Okay...teacher?” REPEAT 1-6

Jung Hoseok

This kid is all over the place oh my god

srsly he is always tripping on shit because he is always running

and his jeans are a little too long because they're hand me downs from his sister and he refuses to let his dad put a belt on him in the morning

loves to hold hands but his hands are always so so so sticky

like wtf

he will want to hold your hand during walking field trips and you want to just yank your hand away and wipe it on your jeans and douse it in hot water but you don’t because he loves to hold hands and his hand is small and soft and warm and you don’t want to hurt his feelings :’(

you compromise by helping him when he’s at the sink and make sure he uses soap

probably the one who won’t stop putting his hands down his pullups

not in a weird way but in that way where kids will develop some weird habit/quirk that they do on autopilot for comfort

He probably tests your patience the most because is also: THE LOUDEST

he is that kid that screams bloody fucking murder when you turn the lights off for naptime,  every day :)

but not to be funny because he’s scared of the dark

he was originally placed somewhere else but he kept getting up in the middle of nap time to drag his blanket and pillow over to you to sleep nearby

when you asked him what he was doing he said that he sleeps near his big sister when he gets scared and you have to bite your knuckle not to cry when you realize he counts you too

Speaking of big sister, dawon goes to the day care for older kids on the floor above ur classroom

sometimes the teacher upstairs will let her come down to say hi

she stands by the doorway and watches him play with stuffed animals for a few minutes before going “hooooooobiiiiiiiiiii” and he drops everything to run over and she pets his hair and asks if he’s being good in that way where you can tell kids are parroting some random adult 

tbh this is your least favorite time of the day because he always wails because she can’t stay but he really misses his big sis and makes you tear up a little too

Sometimes another teacher will come in for “Body Time” and does yoga stretches with the kids

hobi is such a whiz at body time and always does the stretches with a surprising amount of control

its probably his second favorite thing next to running in literal circles in the tall grass during outside time in the spring

He’s a bit of a perfectionist because if you move his dominoes out of the little rows he made, even by just a fraction of a millimeter he. will. lose it.

Also won’t eat food that touches or crusts of bread or fruit skins

but he will eat orange slices without fail as long as you “make them into pieces first teacher :’(”

always gets stung by bees?????

because: yoongi likes bees a lot, he thinks theyre cute and interesting and he always takes hoseok by the hand to the nearest hive to tell him facts and point at things with a pudgy finger

but you’ve told the kids time and time again not to go near beehives but yoongi loves bees too much and hobi startles easily and either jostles the hive or pisses off a nearby bee

Kim Namjoon

Is the only one that can read

you were super shocked when you came over to him one day looking intensely at a book and he was confused and you were like

“what’s the matter, joonie”

“i can’t find the kittens in the picture”

“What kittens” and you read the little blurb on the page and see the word mittens and you’re like oh shit he can kinda read

so now you make sure he reads a different book from the bookshelf each day

jimin is always demanding to be read to and joon is happy to do it even when jimin switches pages on him in the middle of the book or asks to start over or start another book

Has those little baby glasses that tie behind his head so he can see

he always drops them though because he fiddles with the tie in the back and they get too loose throughout the day

He’s one of the more affectionate kids in class and will cling to your leg when he’s having a rough day

doesn’t want you to pick him up unless you’re sitting because he’s scared of heights

will sit on your lap any time its free though

often competes for lap space with kookie and often loses because kookie runs faster or joon will fall because this is joon we’re talking about

hes a good sport about it and stands next to you and asks kookie when his turn is next very sweetly

No surprise but namjoonie is always falling

but he never gets majorly hurt

maybe he scrapes a knee or a hand or something minor

he doesn’t cry much either hes a tough cookie!!

he’ll tell you a fact about prehistoric jellyfish with a wavering voice and watery eyes while you put his bandaid on

Baby Joon LOVES LVOES LVOES apple sauce

he cannot get enough of it and MANY of the stains on his little cords (his favorite clothing item) are apple sauce stains

Namjoon is sadly that kid that will eat anything though so you’re constantly watching him to make sure he doesn’t eat anything deadly

when he’s being too quiet or still in the corner of your vision you walk up quietly behind him and just stick a hand out and he spits whatever it is into the napkin in your palm with a goofy smile

eats his boogers probly :(

Joons mom always brings little treats for you because she was worreid that he would be bullied or isolated when she first enrolled him in the class but he’s doing well and she’s glad for the atmosphere you’ve set up

sometimes she sends him in with your treat if she’s too busy in the morning so he’ll totter in with his glasses and what looks like some homemade cake and your can’t help but scoop him up and plant a kiss on his cheek and tell him to tell his mom thank you

his best friend is probably jin because jin knows the alphabet and appreciates namjoon’s knowledge

jin helps joon get over his fear of the swings, but he’s still scared of heights i assure you he will start to wail if you take his feet too high off the ground

cries when he spills his apple sauce which is often but he always has a spare

 but! you’re not sure if his mom packs it because he loves it so much or because he’s bound to drop one

Park Jimin

When he first came in to school you gasped because those cheeks were a gift from above and the little always-there pout was so cute

he lives for praise, he is such a ham and he loves the way the old ladies at the front desk always try to bribe him with candy for a cheek pinch

he’s a shrewd little business man and won’t let anyone touch his cheeks for less than 2 soft caramels

Park Jimin is as bossy as they come

but everyone in the classroom has no problem with it except maybe you sometimes

he is always going “Teacher! Come here!” from somewhere in the room and you always have to go “You want to try that again, Park Jimin?” and he goes “Teacher! PWEASE come here!” and ur like...ok

Fairly independent

his dad assured you he knows how to cut with regular scissors but jimin continues to use the kiddie scissors and then act like he can’t do it and blink up at you for help

he just wants you to watch him do it

can also put on his own snowsuit without help but still wants you to do it for him because he LIVES for the personal attention

Is a tiny bit violent?

will yell really loud if you take his truck or his dino dolly

or if you make him try to take off his favorite faux cowhide sweater when its time to paint

never hits/kicks/bites tho

the one time it looked like he might hit jungkook you were there in an instant to pull him away and give him a calm and quiet but stern lecture about why his hands are not for hitting or hurting

he had frustrated tears welling up in his eyes when you brought him back to JK and had him use his words

“Kookie, I dont like when you take my toys when im still playin wif dem”

JK: *is preverbal*

and you pry the toy out of jungkook’s freakishly strong baby grip and return it to jk

Jimin’s best friend is probably tae

their moms are friends and they regularly have play dates at each other’s houses

sometimes they come in together in the mornings if one mom is busier than the other

they sleep next to each other during nap time

Chim cries when he can’t sit next to tae during snack time

Has a very adult palate for a baby

i.e. he loves vegetables

is kind of nosy and will come over to your desk when you open your lunch bag and ask to see the vegetables

you make sure to always pack a veggie because the one time you didn’t his eyes widened and he said “mama says you die if you dont eat no veg-ables”

asks if everything is a “veg-able”

jimin: *points to sandwich* veg-able?

you: no

jimin: *points to kimbap/turkey leg/piece of cake/bag of chips/an apple* veg-able?

you:....no

if you did bring a veggie that he doesn’t already have in his lunch, he’ll ask for a bite

normally you have to tell kids no when they ask for your food because you’d end up with everyone asking for a bite and no lunch, but no one else likes veggies in the class. 

so sometimes you slip a sliced cucumber to him and he holds it in two hands and runs back to his spot to eat it and then comes back like an outdoor cat looking for more food

Has a lovely singing voice

its high and pretty, kind of angelic and he tells you that he sings for his grandma a lot

you praise his singing so naturally he loves music day too and if you sing a song he sings with his mom at home he gets so excited

yoongi is enthralled when jimin knows the words to a “teacher song” before its been taught to the class

Kim Taehyung

idk why this is so pertinent to my idealization of him as a child BUT: Has the biggest head out of anyone in the classroom sorry

is so so so cute, might even be your favorite..

he’s super agreeable

loves to cuddle, eat all his food in his little stackable lunch containers, naps well, plays nicely with others, listens pretty well

BUT

he always pees himself :(

and you don’t understand it because his dad came in and bragged about how much of a big boi his son is at home in the bathroom using the toilet but at school? NOPE

he has like 8 changes on clothes for this reason

you can always tells when he’s about to pee himself because

he stands in the middle of the room and just goes “sorry teacher” really softly

your heart breaks when you hear how sad he is that he wet himself but you’re also a little irate because you’re convinced no one deals with as much pee as you do

you give him the talk every time which consists of your wriggling him into some ridiculous pink overalls while trying to make eye contact with him so you can tell him that when he feels like he has to go, he can just go to the potty

Tae carries a blanket around at all times!!!!!

he takes it everywhere with him and uses a different one to cover him up during nap time.

cries on the days that his dad drops him off without it because it has to be washed

the blanket was purple at one point but now it is straight up grey-brown

is surprisingly good at walking/running with it and not tripping on it

Jimin  started calling him tata

so now everyone calls him tata

Is probably the class sweetheart as well

when he’s out sick, literally everyone goes “where’s tata” at random times of the day even though you went over who was “at school” and who was “at home” and said he was at home

tae is so so so so good at drawing its crazy

hes way above his age grade in terms of drawing BUT he has a little trouble getting a pencil into his grip 

so you have to help him finagle it into his little hand but once he does WOOO here comes a dragon with you on its back holding a big ol sword

Is that one kid who manages to run around naked the most

its probably because you’re always in the middle of changing him when someone else distracts you and you turn around and all of the sudden he’s naked as the day he was born from the belly button and waddling back to where jimin is playing with flubber on the rug

you have to run over and scoop him up but also hold him at arms length because hello? pee?

he thinks this is hilarious and flaps his arms like hes flying

Everyone kisses tae

like when the kids get to that stage where they all try to kiss each other because their parents probably kiss them and they're like imitating their parents

everyone goes for tae

he takes it like a champ

but his face is probably v sticky after wards so you pull him over and take a wet wipe to his face

might ask you for a kiss and you place one on his LARGE forehead lol

His grandma comes in often with dolls she made for the class

tae shows them off proudly during his show and tell days and makes sure everyone plays nicely with them or theyll break because theyre normally made from soft yarn

He has a major thing for stickers and is always asking you for stickers to adorn his whole body with 

you are constantly telling him to take stickers off his face and sometimes he puts them on his eyebrow and you sigh because crying is inevitable at that point

you have limited him to 3 stickers on any given day and they go on a piece of paper labeled “Taehyung’s Tata’s stickers”

was mad when you tried to write his full name on the paper because he is tata at school >: (

Jeon Jungkook

the youngest! a true baby

when he first came to the classroom he was right in the middle in terms of age so like he technically aged out of the nursery down the hall but he wasn’t at the normal age minimum to enter your classroom and you were like Ummmmm i guess he can come? because you didn’t have very many kids so what’s one more right?

Started walking and running in the same day during his first week at the classroom!!!

you were worried he’d be too small to keep up with the other kids and might be hurt with their type of play but nope

he was constantly crawling after them trying to keep up until one day he just...stood up and you were like omg and pulled your phone up

when his parents came to pick him up you showed them the video and his dad cried

Now he’s the fastest runner in the class

he doesn’t really talk yet

hes still preverbal but you can tell he gets whats going on around him

the others are good about it

although you did have to have a day where you addressed the question they kept asking you

“Why doesn’t kookie have words?”

“he’s too little. but he’ll talk when he’s ready”

it was a short talk

He knows two words

no and something that is the approximation of hyung but you’re not certain

if he wants your specific attention he just goes “AH” really loud

says no to everything even when he means yes

this means that when you ask him if he wants to eat snack he says no and then cries when you put his lunchbox away thinking he may actually not be hungry

despite being the best at toddling, he always wants to picked up

he is such a teacher’s pet its crazy

its probably the one piece of evidence that he is the least mature of the group

and also because he misses the presence of his mom

he will settle for sitting in your lap when you’re at your desk

or when you’re trying to read to the group during “carpet reading time”

he will try to turn the pages for you but it took him a while to realize you weren’t always done reading when he turned a page and you’d have to fight him to turn the page back so you could finish

now he waits for you to say “you can turn the page now kook”

He is so so so shy omg

if a teacher from another classroom comes by to borrow something, they naturally try to come over and say hi to the one kid who you’re carrying on your hip or sitting in your lap and he just turns and smushes his face into your armpit until he suspects they’ve left

he does, however, have a weird obsession with the handyman that comes in to repair that one tricky light in the back of the art closet

kook will stare at him until he leaves and its cute because he’ll leave your lap or whine to be put down and toddle over to watch him work from a “reasonable distance”

the repairman is kind of gruff looking but he always turns and spots kook watching him like 8^O and will snort

one time he handed kook a rubber band that he had in his breast pocket and kook kept it clutched in his little hand all day

actually waves goodbye when he leaves its so precious

Kook is very sensitive to touch and stuff

so in the winter when he has to wear layers he cries a lot if the t-shirt under his sweater bunches up the wrong way

like he’s so finicky about tactile stuff

he can’t have bare feet ever

wears slippers all year, even in the summer

also cries if the classroom gets too loud and covers his ears

you think maybe he may have some sort of sensory sensitivity

won’t eat the bananas in his lunch unless you mash them with a fork for him

cried when you cut open a pumpkin to show the kids the seeds inside and later roast them because the smell was too strong for him

you had to put a tiny face mask on him to get him to calm down and he resembled a ninja turtle the whole day

He loves hobi very much and is always super giggly when hobi pays extra attention to him

always follows him around and is constantly bumping his nose on hobi’s back because he follows him THAT CLOSELY

always fights with jin

meaning he constantly swipes toys out of his hands and then sometimes gets sat on as punishment and cries until you heft jin off him

you don’t know why they always fight

is so good at hidden item picture books like Ispy

you will zoom through them because he finds everything immediately and you wonder if maybe hes a genius

you had a hunch one day and put him down in front of a 400 piece puzzle and he did a surprisingly good chunk of it in the span of the school day and went straight to it the next day

I was trying so hard to write this and couldnt think of anything and then i remembered yesterday that my friemd Worked in a daycare for the last three years??? so a lot of this is real life stuff which is funny but also really extra

all pics are from weheartit...

[magicbabydreamboat]

2018 THE BODY IS WAY OUT LIKE ACTUALLY OUT LIKE ALL THE OTHER TIMES IT WAS OUT WERE JUST WARM-UP AND NOW IT'S REALLY OVER. 2018 tamarind, John Frusciante, stuffed crust (kidding), blended margaritas, anything that says "I'm resigned to live like the mall of America bc I'm stressed about climate change". I've had an inactive Tumblr for about 6 years now. fuck the government etc. Fuck urself really. Don't we use queer politics as a way 2b relevant and continue to hate voting? masturbation is back in (remember- body OUT), not in a 70s or 90s CUNT way (I shudder) but feeling ur full 'borg-self (see next "month's" "discussion" on the self). Pass that love to ur friends hella not sex positive just give them affirmation on a real level. Vulvic flowers are always out I am blocking you on Instagram. Is it possible for the Internet to be out? Til it actually is maybe talking about it is. Circle K hot dogs, the Polar Pop, continue 2b the height of fashion, not making fun of Tucson for being shitty but like 79 cents for a beverage that stays cooler longer. Wrap urself in Styrofoam and see if it works for us too. FUZZY BOOTS. Platforms! always. Drinking water. Butch anklets (what is it?), glow stars applied directly to the non-body cosmology, and honestly latex. Boxing and rubber sex dresses. Boxing shorts, insulation of all kinds (but porous). Crops are timeless but plastic-wrap tops are rly coming up ;) "Language and meaning are mutating at an unprecendented rate and things are banalized instantaneously/a climging and fabrics that cling/saran wrap that presses and seals/clinging in general" 2018 if we can't be done at last with astrology then lying about your chart is hot. My sun is in Circle K and ur a Spanish moss rising. I'm not wrapped in plants. Climate change isn't real but the government says it is. Go swimming. P.S. Territory magazine continues 2b garbage but maybe no one reads it? We still wouldn't turn down a lress war. We charge our flip phones with the energy produced by burning Territory.

this is a collborative piece

[noisegf]

When u get hungry but there's nothing in ur house so you order a large stuffed crust pizza from Pizza Hut The only perk of being forced to participate in capitalism instead of mooching off my mom's participation in capitalism: being able to buy myself a big ass pizza

[jeichanhaka]

If Any Would Avenge: 27

Chapter 27: Dilemma

Lying on a cold, rough floor reminiscent of a dungeon, Killian's eyes shot open. His brain foggy, it took him a few moments and the soreness of his gut to remember about the cloaked woman and where she'd brought him. His stomach twisted and he lifted himself to his feet, while bracing himself against the pain from his gut. The air around him was cold and stale, tinged with a musty stench of mold. The walls damp, their gray cement hue only dimly discernible beneath the sparse electric ceiling light.

'I'm still in Storybrooke.' He muttered, glancing over the cement walls and electric lights. 'Or at least in The Land Without Magic.'

Glancing down the dimly lit corridor, he started walking forward, his eyes and ears alert for movement. The pain across his abdomen was already subsiding to a numb throb, only to instead fill with dread. It gnawed at him and at the lingering fog around his memory. There was something. Something he was forgetting. Something important.

Killian shook his head and pressed on, unwilling to spend the time trying to remember what he'd forgot. Not when he knew, sensed in his bones that those he loved were in danger. "I need to get to Emma and Sadie. That cloaked…." He groaned and nearly stumbled, his head throbbing as he tried to remember the cloaked woman's face. Her voice. It blurred the more he tried focusing on it, as though it was forbidden.

-"I've waited so long for this."-

A voice hissed in the pirate's head, the words distant like an echo of a memory hidden deep away. Killian gritted his teeth, ignoring the voice and the burning pain it triggered across his gut.

-"...didn't travel...years to...slip by me."-

The pirate drew in a deep breath, bracing himself using the wall as his gut roiled, the burning sensation stronger. It felt as though someone had repeatedly cut into his skin, not too deep but enough to make moving around a bitch. "...fuck." He swore and paused a moment, slipping his hand beneath his leather vest.

The moment he touched his stomach, he flinched, not just from the sharp pain as he touched his skin, but from the feeling of dried blood. He couldn't see them, but he felt the wounds on his stomach, crusted over with dried blood and pus.

"Bloody hell…." Killian groaned, his head throbbing.

"The Savior's…? You want Emma's daughter?" Gold gawked at the young man, surprised by the latter's demand. "Why? What could you possibly need with a newborn baby?" He asked, already thinking about all the various dark spells requiring a newborn or parts of one. His brown eyes narrowed, wondering which of such dark spells, if any, the youth sought to cast.

"That is my business. Mine alone." The youth replied brusquely, catching the furrow forming in the Dark One's brow and the glint of trepidation in his eyes. "Or are you having doubts about our deal already?"

"Of course not." Gold snapped, scowling at the young man. "I'm simply curious as to your reasons to want Emma's baby, or any baby. Certainly the child couldn't be much use to you, at least not enough for you to give up possession of the Dark One dagger so easily."

Listening to Gold, the youth tapped his lips, partly obscuring the gleeful smirk forming there. It widened as the Dark One's furrowed brow deepened and his eyes filled with suspicion. "...so you assume. But this child, Sadie, is special."

"Special? How so?" Gold inquired, curious. But to the Dark One's dismay the youth simply shook his head and placed his forefinger to his lips. Seconds after the gesture a cloud of dust surrounded the youth, obscuring him completely, and when it cleared he had vanished. Leaving behind nothing but silence and a single ebony feather.

x

Standing across from Emma and Killian's place, hidden by the shadows on the empty porch of what was William Kidd's house, Gold glowered silently. His eyes narrowed, many thoughts rushing through his head: some dealing with the 'coincidence' of Kidd's house being right across from the hook-handed pirate's, others with how he would manage to take Sadie. Hopefully without bringing suspicion upon himself - at least not until he had his dagger back and could leave for the Enchanted Forest with his full power.

But more than anything Gold thought about what his unwritten son had said. That Sadie was special. That something about her, something she possessed - magic or destiny or something - was worth the young man giving up the Dark One dagger. Worth surrendering his control over Gold, and his chance to take all the power of the Dark One for himself. Even now it chilled Gold thinking about how close he was to dying at his unwritten son's hand. Not since the first time he'd seen Gideon, grown up in Belle's dreams when he was trying to wake her from the sleeping curse, did he feel so horrified. And frustrated. The idea of his son not just hating him, but wanting to kill him, chilled him.

And despite denying and refusing to believe it every second of their earlier conversation, Gold knew the youth spoke the truth. The young man was his son from Isaac's book. A son whose personality was much like his own, cunning and thirsting for power. The only things missing was fear and a soft spot for loved-ones. Which only solidified his familial connection to Gold, as more than himself, the youth reminded him of his father. Peter Pan.

The youth was just as cold as the man-child. If the young man's chin and eye shape hadn't reminded him of Belle, Gold would've suspected he was some kind of trick thought of by the bastard who'd abandoned him. Now it was simply proof that the youth was the unwritten child.

His unwritten child, who wanted to kill him. Who relished the thought of killing him and taking his power. Gold wondered for a second if his own father had ever felt what he felt now. Knowing your own son wanted to kill you…it…. He shook his head, dispelling the idea that his father Peter Pan had ever felt similar to him now. The bastard who'd abandoned him had never wanted him, so it was unlikely he'd have been affected at all by Gold despising him.

Gold though wanted his sons. Always. Even the one Isaac had wrote for him in the book. The erased one. It mattered little that the young man's existence wasn't through natural means, he was his son. And the only child of his that was still alive. The only one he still had a chance to be a family with.

'But you do realize, don't you, who else he is?' His Dark One consciousness prodded, repeating its question despite his efforts to ignore it. 'His name. The name he took, it's echoed in your head since the moment you two spoke.' His imp voice crooned, appearing beside him as an hallucination. Chuckling coldly. 'Nemesis.'

Gold tensed, his jaw clenching at his Dark One's subconscious' words.

'That means, dearie, that he's the one who ordered Gideon's….'

"Shut up." Gold growled, stuffing away the thought firmly inside the deepest recesses of his brain. The idea the most unbearable. The most horrible.

'Fine. But it makes one wonder, doesn't it? If he can do that to his own blood, what will he do to Sadie? It's not like her young age will protect her.' His subconscious chided. 'You don't even know what he wants her for. Not to mention how it will affect your future plans.'

Gold flashed an angry scowl at the imp hallucination, his eyes gleaming with frustration and a tad bit of wariness.

'Come on, dearie. You can't hide the truth from me.' His imp form tittered, drawing up to him so that he was a mere inch or so away. 'You still want to corrupt the pirate's daughter. You still want to turn her dark for revenge. And for more than just Hook failing to protect Gideon.'

Gold sunk more firmly into the shadows of the porch, chilled but also lulled by his Dark One subconscious.

'You want him to pay for every transgression against you and yours.' The imp continued, his words followed by a mad giggle. 'Every. Single. One.'

Listening to his Dark One subconscious, Gold averted his gaze from the house, thinking about his plan and his premonition concerning Sadie. If Nemesis' plan for the newborn was deadly, if it risked the baby's life...that vision, that future revenge of his would be nonexistent. Worse, it would be his unwritten son who'd go dark, ur, darker, and yet another child would lose its life. For what?

"What does he want with her?" Gold muttered, glowering as he thought, trying to understand his would-be son. To imagine what the youth wanted. What, if anything, would be important to someone like Nemesis? Someone with the power to jump in at any point of time. Someone outside the story. Someone….

Someone…unwritten.

His narrowed eyes twitched, his scowling lips a thin line as the idea flashed through his thoughts, as clear and sure as one of his visions. Though it simply increased his befuddlement over Nemesis' actions. "Is that what he wants…to be rewritten into the story? But...why not just go to the Author? Surely Henry would've been able to write him back in. Why…?"

'Dearie, do you seriously have to ask why?' His imp self goaded, making a tsking sound before chuckling. 'Isaac wrote him to take after you. Ergo, he'd want what you would.'

Gold sucked in a breath and scowled at the floor of the porch without noticing it, realizing what Nemesis wanted. Or rather didn't want. "He doesn't want to lose his power. His ability to transverse to anywhere or when in the story. He wants to be returned to the story, but with his power intact."

'Hee hee. Right you are.' The tittering imp spoke, making a few grandiose gestures before cozying up close to him. 'And there's only one way he can accomplish that.'

"A powerful reversal spell. One cast on his page from Isaac's book." Gold muttered, his knowledge from his centuries of living and from being the Dark One meshing with his cleverness. "But that doesn't explain why he needs the pirate's daughter..." His eyes widened and he glanced back at the window leading to Sadie's nursery, a sickening feeling sinking in his stomach. "Unless…." Filled with curiosity, and with dread gnawing at his gut, he teleported himself into the baby's room, taking only the briefest of moments to check that no one else was around.

Appearing just a foot away from the crib, Gold peered down at the newborn and visibly relaxed upon noticing she was asleep. He still remembered how quickly he warmed to her earlier in the sheriff station, moved by his grief and paternal desire. Something he couldn't afford happening now, especially if his suspicion was correct.

"Now, now, dearie." He muttered, studying the newborn and debating how to proceed - to prove if his suspicion was right or not, he had to know what kind of magic Sadie had. Something more readily determined by seeing it in practice or testing a strand of hair - neither of which were feasible with the newborn. Babies seldom could use magic even when born with it, and like many newborns Sadie had little hair to speak of. "How to do…."

"Gah….Bhhr." Having woken up seconds after Gold started muttering, Sadie gurgled. Her wide blue eyes, filled with innocence, curiosity, and trust, gazed up at the Dark One. She smiled, reaching out for Gold, not at all afraid - far too young and innocent to know she should be wary. It nearly caused the Dark One to falter and teleport away to figure out some loophole to get his dagger back instead. Nearly.

"Shh. I…." Gold whispered, raising his hand in order to cast a sleeping spell on Sadie, lest she start bawling like the newborn she was.

It was in that moment that he froze and a strange feeling passed over his body. One quite like the times he crossed the town-line into the Land Without Magic. His eyes widened as he gawked at his hand, struggling to use magic but unable. His first thought was that Nemesis must have gotten hold of the chest and took the dagger back, but he quickly dismissed it. He wasn't being controlled, his magic was simply...gone.

"No…." He muttered, nearly giving into panic, until he realized his limp too was gone. His leg felt whole, strong, like it did before the Ogres War. Yet that wasn't…. Realizing the truth before even noticing that Sadie had managed to grab hold of his sleeve, he backed away quickly. The moment the newborn's tiny hand let go, he felt his magic flood back and his leg return to its crippled, but magically supported, state. Staring at the newborn, Gold's heart raced, horrified.

'Seems Nemesis was right, dearie.' His Dark One subconscious blurted, excited and amused. 'Sadie is special.' The imp paused, walking to the other side of the newborn's crib, and chuckling. 'This means your suspicion is on the nose as well. Nemesis….'

"No…." Gold shook his head, his stomach in knots.

'...is going to steal Sadie's magic and use it to renew his story.' The imp tittered, goading Gold. 'You'll once more have a son to dote on, dearie.' There was a pause, the manifestation of his Dark One subconscious leaning over the crib and flashing a heartless grin before continuing. 'There's just the one thing...this tiny, precious baby….' Another pause while the imp manifestation glanced down at Sadie, eyeing her emotionlessly except for an echo of his heartless grin twitching at his lips. '...will have to die.'