#viscar amelia

[helen-high-water]

Bloodborne bosses and how angry they are:

(before starting please note that I'm basing this solely on the limited amount of information I have on each boss, Bloodborne lore is confusing and I have forgotten a lot of it,also these are in the order of the wiki page,also I am aware some of these bosses may not even be able to feel human emotions but that's not gonna stop me)

The cleric beast:

MA'AM UH SIR OR MX WHATEVER YOU ARE PLEASE CALM DOWN AND STOP SCREAMING (VERY ANGRY, lovely screams tho)

Father Gascoigne:

He's angry but he's allowed to be angry cuz he's a dilf (very angry, thought I wasn't attracted to him then I heard the beastly howls)

Viscar Amelia:

I'll be honest I liked you more when you weren't a monster the size of a movable house with a shit ton of bandages? ribbons? whatever it is it's very hauntingly beautiful though (angry,she has a normal amount of angry but not a normal amount of beast unfortunately)

Blood starved beast:

it's just hungry,I think if we give it enough blood it'll just become a puppy, unfortunately it's hungry and the only blood around is yours(Hangry,Less meat flaps please)

The witch(es) of hemwick:

I do not enjoy the clusterfuck of eyes you coat yourselves in, I think they may be slightly angry but they mostly just want eyes(Slightly angry, Please wear normal clothes grandmas)

Dark beast Paarl:

it's a puppy! Skeleton puppy! skeleton puppy with lightning magic!angry skeleton puppy with lightning magic! (Angry,love it's zap zaps,would make a wonderful pet if it wasn't murderous and electrifying,oh also being the size of a small building doesn't really help)

Shadow of Yharnam:

They might be a bit busy being snakes to be angry,also probably a fight that might cause me to go insane if I were to do it(angry snakes?maybe?)

Rom the vacuous spider:

she's not angry, she's just disappointed (HA mom joke) , She's too nice to be angry at you but throwing meteors and sicking her children on you is fair game(not angry,Love and hate your name)

The one reborn:

put it back in the moon please,the definition of creepy and wet, whatever birthed this monstrosity should've considered an abortion,has 4(I think?) Adoptive witch mothers and none of them make it less bad(it's a fucking moon baby it doesn't know what anger is)

Martyr Logarius:

Santa is not doing well,and he's going to make sure you know that by kicking your ass into next Friday (angry, please stop floating it looks weird)

Amygdala:

what kinda fucked up giant enemy spider are you,why did you rip out your arms , couldn't you just hit me with them without ripping them out?why are you named after a brain part?(angry,stomps a lot)

Celestial emissary:

what even are you supposed to be,you 're kind of blueish so that makes you less angry,but also you look like there is a huge egg where your brain should be,I don't like you (not angry, please stop existing)

Ebrietas, Daughter of the Cosmos:

she's just lonely,she doesn't even attack you without you attacking her first, poor child (not angry,She looks like she has a giant clam for a head)

Micolash host of the nightmare:

who's crazy twink is this,he's way too crazy to feel anything other than utter chaos(not angry,needs a shower)

Mergo's wet nurse:

now I wouldn't say she's angry on account of the fact that she doesn't even have a body,or at least one we can see,she looks very calm but she's still gonna slice you like a lawn mower specifically made for hunters(not angry,very spooky,love the theme)

Gehrman the first hunter:

legit the first time I read your name I just said "is he German" ,grampa off the chair what will he do,he's not angry he just wants you to leave the dream (for some reason?) (Not angry,cool scythe)

Moon presence:

depending on which ending she can be very angry or not angry at all ,if you leave the hunter's dream she probably doesn't even aknowledge your existence after that,if you beat Grandpa G and you don't have enough umbilical cords in you she's not angry too,but if you want to turn into a slug you have to make the moon angry,very flowery, please don't bite my stomach that hurts (not angry/angry)

Ludwig the accursed holy blade:

is your name an oxymoron (I don't think I'm even using that correctly) starts out very angry but then calms down a little, unfortunately for you that means he's stronger (very angry then not angry, Horse man very cool,very cool sword)

Laurence ,the first viscar:

It's literally just the cleric beast but on fire , still very angry though(very angry, someone get a fire extinguisher,or don't idk)

Living failures:

if I see one of you fuckers make a "ha same" joke I'll send you to the shadow realm, they're not really angry,but they sure as hell want to ruin your day, pretty star magic though (not angry,what happened to your heads why are you deflated)

Lady Maria of the astral clock tower:

Probably my favorite boss,but she's not angry, she's way too tired to be angry,her anger has burned and burned and burned and left her empty,she needs some rest, although similarly to Ludwig,her being not angry just makes it worse for you (not angry,Badass lady with swords , wonderful, please don't stab yourself)

Orphan of kos:

ah yes Kos,or as some say kosm gr- *gets hit with a placenta*,You really should've listened to Lady Maria when she said "a corpse should be left well alone" because this baby knows only three things

1) Something killed it's mother

2)you are something

3)unending violence

The angriest thing in the game,how is your placenta so solid,not even therapy can make it not angry (VERY ANGRY, Stop screaming you butterfly looking MOTHERFUCKER,Very fair reason for being angry I would say tho)

And that's it,if you disagree with any of these please consider the following:

Suck my ass/j