#why can't arthropods be big and huggable?

[evolutionsvoid]

I want to start this entry out right away saying that I absolutely despise the name of this species. Savanna Devils?! Seriously?! It's not only insulting but wrong! The name makes them out to be some bloodthirsty killers who are a menace to everything that lives and breathes! Ridiculous! Who gave them this horrible name? Not a natural historian, I can tell you that! They would have called them Savanna Spiders, or Cacklers or anything else that accurately describes what they are, but nooooooo, we got to be all horribly dramatic about it! It makes my leaves stiffen just thinking about it! Oooooo, I hate it. I hate it so much. But I guess we must put this aside and actually talk about them. Perhaps people who read this entry will see that the name is a complete misnomer. The....Savanna Devils are found exactly where the first part of their name suggests: savannas. Their habitats always contain large amount of grasses, with only a sparse amount of trees or shrubs to be found. These habitats also lean towards the hot side of the spectrum, possessing sweltering summers and mild winters. The Savanna Devils prefer these tall grass biomes, as their low profile allows them to hide within them. At the peak of their humped backs, they stand about three feet tall, with their body length stretching to about five to six feet. Mind you these lengthwise measurements are for the body, and are not including the forelimbs. Many storytellers like to add in their forelimb length in order to make these creatures sound more massive and terrifying. At this size, Savanna Devils are perfect for scurrying through the tall grass, keeping themselves concealed from predators and other dangers. These tall grasses are also used to form dens for them to hide and rest in during the non-hunting hours. If you spot a tube-like structure made of swirled grasses, it is safe to guess that it might be a resting spot for a Savanna Devil. While Savanna Devils may appear opposing enough on their own, they quite prefer to keep together in cackles (or clusters if you prefer). These cackles have about six to eight individuals within them, with there usually being one or two more females than males. With the cackle, there will be a dominate female, who is often the largest and strongest of the group. She is the one who leads the cackle during foraging expeditions, taking the front position of their arrow-like formations. While in this triangular formation, the males will take the out most corners behind her, with the other females positioned between them. It is believed that this formation is best used to ensure that breeding or carrying females aren't the first to be attacked if a predator arrives. While the lead female may be the one most exposed, she is often able to put up quite a fight for those foolish enough to attack her, giving the others time to escape harm. When out to forage, this formation will streak its way through the tall grass, following scents and smells to locate their favorite food: carrion.

"Now wait a minute, Chlora," you may say. "When you say carrion, you mean dead things they kill, right?" Nope! When I say carrion, I mean dead things that were already dead before the Savanna Devils got there. That is because Savanna Devils are scavengers! Scavengers, you hear?! Not predators! Not voracious killing machines, scavengers! They eat things that are already dead! Though Savanna Devils seem scary and monstrous to those with poor taste, they do not like to do any actual hunting or killing themselves. They prefer to search for carcasses and feast upon the scraps that are left. When they spot a carcasses to feed upon, the formation will widen and split apart to encircle the corpse, keeping themselves hidden in the tall grass. When they have surrounded their food, they will check to make sure no predators are waiting in ambush. If the coast is clear, they will all scurry forward at once and begin to feast. The other reason they secretly circle the carcass is in case other scavengers are on the body. If vultures and other carrion eaters are there, the cackles' mad dash from all sides will scare them off, that way they don't have to share!   When a carcass is secured, the cackle will happily feed. Everything on the body is consumed: meat, hides, claws and bone. The mouth parts of a Savanna Devil are incredibly powerful, acting as both shears and bone crushers when needed. Dried, hardened flesh is nothing to their jaws, and leg bones are easily snapped in half with a powerful bite. Their long forelimbs are used to pin down parts as they bite and chew, making the process easier for them. Every part is shredded into tiny pieces to be swallowed, and their digestive tract is well suited for dissolving every scrap they take in. In the course of hours, a cackle of Savanna Devils can erase a carcass from the landscape, leaving just a dried stain in the soil. Already I can hear people start saying things like "But Chlora, I heard Savanna Devils hunt and kill their own prey." Or "I was told that they sneak into nests, dens and houses when prey is sleeping and rip them apart during their slumber." Or a "don't Savanna Devils have flesh melting venom they spray onto people that rot their limbs off for eating?" No, no and absolutely not! These are not just myths, they are lies! Horrible lies! Savanna Devils are scavengers, and the only time they kill prey is when it is already mortally wounded and dying. Yes, they will finish off a wildebeest that is dying of disease or bleeding out, but they don't strike the first blow. The animal practically has to be laying on the ground in a state of almost-death for them to be confident enough to do that. They are fast, but not nearly fast enough to chase down prey of that caliber. Also, Savanna Devils don't have venom glands. At all. They literally have no way to create, store or use venom, so there is no way that the "flesh-melting venom" myth is a thing. If you hear anyone rambling on about such a thing, do the world a favor and tell them to shut their lying mouth hole. When it comes to reproduction, most Savanna Devils breed within their cackle. The males and a few of lesser females will usually breed amongst themselves, but interestingly enough, the dominate female does not. While the other females will simply take whichever male is closest, the lead female will choose which male she wants to breed with. This can include a male from an entirely different cackle! When out foraging during breeding season, the dominate female may catch a whiff of a potential mate, and drag her group along to hunt him down. When she spots the cackle that contains the male she wants, she will confront the lead female and communicate with her. This involves some kind of odd fight/dance, where the two nip at one another and stalk around as if they were ready to go for each other's throats. If all goes well, the other lead female will offer up the wanted male and the two will breed. After the leader gets what she wants, the groups will part ways. Sometimes the cackles may even swap males if they choose to. It is quite the odd system. After breeding is completed, the fertilized females will lay their sticky eggs in the grass, and then attach them to their undersides. This does not include the lead female though, as she will attach her eggs to one of the lesser females who did not breed that season. She will be the one to carry her eggs, so that the leader may move, defend and take charge without the worry of damaging her eggs. These females are labeled as "carrying females." When the larvae hatch, they will continue to cling to their mothers (or carriers), riding on their backs. If predators attack, the young will scurry to their mother's underside to shield themselves from danger. Once they reach a certain age, the young will climb off their mothers and scatter out into the wilderness, looking for another cackle to join. While I addressed this before, it should be brought up again that Savanna Devils have a horrendously fake reputation tacked onto them. The sheer amount of myths and outlandish tales about them is infuriating, as each one is more bonkers than the last. The venom is the craziest of the bunch, as people act like these things spray acid everywhere. I feel that these tales are only created because people find Savanna Devils so frightening (thus the stupid name). No doubt early settlers and explorers saw the cackles ripping into a carcass and instantly assumed that these arachnids downed the beast themselves. I can't blame them for that first impression, but the fact that no one bothered to research them before giving them that stupid name is what frustrates me. What further frightens people are the noises Savanna Devils make when foraging, feeding or communicating. Their stridulations and rubbing of hairs can create chirps, crackling buzzes, but most famous is their "laughing." These "laughs," a high-pitched, fast-paced "yer" sound, are used when the group is out searching for food. These sounds appear to be used to keep track of where the others are, but to other ears, people hear it as demonic laughter of predators hunting down prey. With that, you have packs of large spiders that laugh and yip as they search for meat, which sounds terrifying to many. Outsiders to the area often believe that Savanna Devils are waiting in every bush and piece of grass, ready to jump out and bite their legs off. This idea is only emboldened during harsh seasons. In times when Savanna Devils cannot find enough food to get by on, they will wander towards towns and cities. Savanna Devils are a lot smarter than people give them credit for, as it has been shown that cackles can recognize hunters from different species. They will quietly follow the hunter, and wait for them to down prey. Once the animal has died, and the hunter goes to claim their kill, the cackle will rush out from all sides. This display is meant to scare, so that the hunter runs off and they can claim the body. It is important to know that this is not an attack at all, just a scare tactic. Local hunters have shown me that standing your ground will eventually deter them. They will not bite, claw or scratch, they just want to spook you. If you stand tall and proud over your kill, they will give up and find someone else to follow. While this is an ingenious tactic on their part, it has fouled their reputation a bit. Hunters from other areas do not know this is a ruse, and assume they have come to devour them. After they run off screaming, they will go to the nearest bar or tavern and ramble on about how they were viciously assaulted by Savanna Devils and just barely escaped with their lives. Which will eventually lead to some group going out to hunt them down, which forces the Savanna Devils to defend themselves. When trapped, Savanna Devils will indeed bite back,and they bite hard. Fools who attack them have a chance of losing a foot or leg, as they can shear right through the flesh and bone. If you don't want to lose a limb, just leave these poor things alone. Thankfully, my visit to the towns close Savanna Devil territory has put some ease to my anger on the subject. While tourists, outsiders and fools see the Savanna Devils as spidery menaces, many who live near them understand their true nature. These villagers construct their towns and farms to keep these creatures out, and know that one needs to be careful when hunting and butchering animals. In some cases, defending your kill from a cackle of Savanna Devils is a sign of manhood (or something like that). If you have the guts to stand your ground from their fake assault, then that shows how big and strong you are (which is nice that they understand they mean no harm, but how is it some feat of manliness if you know that they won't attack you? Guess I am just an ignorant outsider on that front). Some people have even taken in Savanna Devils as pets or guard animals. They will happily feed on any bones or scraps that remain after a meal, and they are used to working in groups. As a pet, I have heard that hunters use them to flush out prey from the brush, like a hunting dog! Others take them in as guard dogs, or pets meant to intimidate others. With their appearance, false reputation and powerful bite, certain locals find them as suitable creatures to ward away robbers or intimidate others. I remember visiting a store in a more touristy side of town once whose owner had a Savanna Devil. The little guy had his bed setup by the pay counter, so that he was mere feet away from customers who came up to pay for their goods and souvenirs. You should have seen the looks on outsiders' faces when they saw him! They went white as a ghost! In one case, a man dropped everything and ran right out of the store! From the sounds of laughter outside, I think many locals sit outside to see such spectacles! I conversed with the owner and asked about his pet. The little guy's name was Amani, and he was such the sweetheart! The owner told me that he originally got Amani to help with hunting, but eventually settled down with his store. Now Amani served as a "guard," who deterred robbers and shop lifters. He used the word "guard" loosely, as Amani had never bitten anyone in his life. His mere presence kept people in line, even though his owner was sure he could never get him to bite anyone if he wanted to. Most of the time he just snoozed in his bed, only called to action in special cases. He told me that if he spotted suspicious figures in his store, he would order Amani to "flush out the prey." This command was used back in his hunting days, which would cause Amani to rush around prey to spook them into flight. This order now caused Amani to run through the aisles of the store, usually scaring the lights out of the suspicious customer and causing them to make a quick exit. Honestly, he was just the cutest little guy, and I would love to have such a creature as a pet! Unfortunately, my pet wish list is almost reaching the triple digits, and most of them I don't think are legal either.               Chlora Myron Dryad Natural Historian Editor note: Don't even be surprised that this entry needs some serious re-editing, Chlora. Some professionalism and restraint would be nice.  - Eucella - ----------------------------------------------------- Here is a species I quite enjoy, the Savanna Devils! A mix of baboon and camel spider for appearance, hyena for some of the behavior (as some hyenas are more predators than scavengers) and more camel spider for the horrendous and fake reputation. Writing this out made me love these little guys even more. I want one! I want one so bad!