#wolf359 reactions

[nobodysdaydreams]

OH AM I GONNA HAVE SOME FUN WITH THIS IF I EVER HAVE THE TIME TO WRITE FANFIC

(Or my reaction to Episode 61 of Wolf359: Brave New World).

Well gang, we did it. We've reach the end. Sorry for how my reactions went from super spaced out to speed running the finale in a number of days, but I did warn you that I'm just sporadic like that. Though I have been semi-putting Brave New World off, because as much as I want to know how Wolf359 ends, I don't want it to end. I love these characters. I want good things for them. As much as I hate what they did, I wish that Hilbert and Maxwell had gotten the chance to get the redemption arc that Jacobi got. Hilbert had plenty of opportunities, but Maxwell was young and its not fair. I don't know how much more sadness they are gonna throw at me, but I'm guessing its a lot and I can't listen to it all in one sitting, so I'm just mentally preparing myself.

I also don't want this to end because I've loved giving you guys these reactions. Thank you all for reading my rambles and enjoying them. It means a lot to me, and I hope you were entertained. Thanks for coming on this journey with me, and please know that the second this is over, I am gonna figure out how to unblock the wolf359 tags (I did it so long ago I forgot how I did it, oopsie-daisy), and I am am gonna be reblogging and going crazy over all your posts and fanart and stuff so I hope you're ready for that.

Plus finishing the podcast also means it's time for me to deliver on those fics I promised y'all, which have been very carefully written (in my head). I will write them out eventually, but if there is anything my tmbs mutuals will tell you, my wolf359 mutuals, it's that my ideas tend to lead to other ideas, which means my fics do tend to be a little long, but (based on the reviews I've gotten) worth the read. So it might take a while to get them on AO3, but when I do, I hope you enjoy them!

Tagging the mutuals who got me invested in this, and if you want to be tagged or untagged from these posts, lmk, or you can follow my blog or simply follow the tag "#bods wolf359 reactions". Anyone who has followed me for a while knows my updates are inconsistent, so I apologize in advance for that and for any spelling/grammar mistakes in my posts.

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs @herawell @commsroom @lovelyladylavie

Episode 61: Brave New World

The fact that Brave New World was written in 1932 and Cutter and Pryce are old and the fact that the message of Brave New World is about humans losing their humanity...already we're setting the stage.

And based on Kepler's earlier declaration, why do I suspect that this is the part where Doug's daughter's life and Minkowski's husband's life are finally on the line. I know Cutter and Pryce won't hesitate to aim their guns at them (and probably the rest of the planet too).

That moment when you can't tell if Wolf359 starts with sad piano music, or if this is just an ad for another podcast.

Oh it's the intro. Hi Hera! Or Miranda...oh wait I genuinely can't tell if this is Miranda talking about herself or Hera talking about her.

Clouded eyes, weak heart, child genius, orphan, no friends...I see. Obsessed with making things stronger and better. Yeah, except for herself I bet. Oh. She made her friends. Because she could control them. "Never left her behind, never talked back, never were afraid of her...except when she wanted them to be." "The one thing she couldn't fix was herself" see I called it!

Until? Oh no. Marcus.

And Old Man? Almost as clever as her? "Hello little girl. I want you to make a doll for me. You're very best doll. It must look like a real person, and sound like a real person, and be a real person." "And if I can?" "Then you and I will fix the world. I will be young and you will be whole and the world will finally be everything it could be. Everything it should be."

Okay. Thoughts.

When I made my jokes about Pryce being Cutter's evil science girlfriend, I was not assuming a romantic relationship, I was trying to use that language to insult Pryce and Cutter by making them sound like the kids they hate so much in a frivolous, juvenile and toxic relationship. Then, I was told by a few of you that given this assumption, it’s important that I know that I shouldn't assume that Pryce met Cutter when she was young based on this story and it was meant to be "fairytale language", which does make sense given that Cutter being willing to call Miranda his "work wife" when he's known her since she was young enough to be his granddaughter is incredibly creepy.

I appreciate the clarification, but also, I really don't think it matters whether this is hyperbole or not. If it is, then okay. Pryce and Cutter's relationship is still weird. If it's not, then Cutter's a creep, what a surprise. Tell me something I don't know.

"And so they did. And everyone lived happily ever after. The end."

The fact that it's Cutter that interrupts Miranda's story to give that closing line and declare this the end adds to the creepiness. Miranda says what Marcus's promise to her was, but never says whether she agreed before Marcus jumps in with "and so they did". Also, if Miranda was dying, Cutter was her only chance at survival. It also sounds like she was a kid with a pretty messed up view of the world. Doesn't excuse anything she did, but see Cutter? THAT is how you give a good sad backstory, and she did it in five minutes. You spent a whole hour with Nash just so you could cry that the government took your precious telescope.

--------------

"THAT'S the evil plan?" Care to fill us in Doug?

"That's THE plan, yes." Shut it Rachel. It's evil and you know it.

It's...so evil. And so...planned. Doug's words might be simple, Rachel, but sometimes simple is better. It gets to the point and cuts through the BS.

"It's real and it's happening" And ARE you happy about this Kepler? And why tell them?

Good question Kepler, why are you here? Please tell me you're going to take Rachel away.

"You're going to help" "of course I am" Are you Kepler? Oh please tell me he gets a redemption arc and betrays Cutter.

Does anyone want to fill ME in on the plan? No one? Okay. :(

"Where's the trust?" That's not for you, Rachel.

"I really don't like her" I don't either, Doug.

"What about Cutter's plan?" WHAT IS THE PLAN? WILL BOB AGREE TO IT? WHAT WILL WORK? WHAT WILL THEY DO?

We can't stop them, so let's see our families again. No, Minkowski, you can do this! I believe in you! You can't just go home, we have two hours left! That's plenty of time to stop them.

It's been a long...years.

I forget how long they've been up there. And that everyone on Earth believes they're dead.

And not do anything about WHAT? WHAT IS THE PLAN PLEASE FILL ME IN.

What was that sound?

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Oh Doug is in the comms room. Oh yikes. It's okay, Doug. We've all broken very expensive lab equipment before.

"Living in a cuckoo clock" you have no idea, Doug.

"I wouldn't do that." Is that Pryce or Hera? And yeah why is there gas?

"Good boy" oh good it's Hera. Hera calls him good boy, Pryce just calls him boy.

"Who are you?" OH THIS IS DOUG MEETING HERA FOR THE FIRST TIME. At first I thought that Doug...forgot her? Or something? I was confused.

Ultraviolet halo? Contraband cigarettes. 😂

"Just ask. I'm here to help." Aw that was sweet.

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Ew Rachel. I'm gonna start using "----" breaks to cut off sections.

"Actually he's in quite a lot of pain. Back to work." Always charming, Rachel.

"Thanks for saving our lives-" Kepler, that's a great question. What IS this? Where was the concern for brainwashed Jacobi or better still, WHERE WAS YOU CONCERN FOR MAXWELL? Or Jacobi dealing with her death?

"And do what? Get myself shot? Get you shot? No. I played the game." Was it worth it, Kepler?

"That's the lie you tell yourself. The truth? The truth is that you were afraid. And the only thing YOU did was try to save YOUR hide?"

Dang this dialogue is amazing.

"You're not wrong." "Which one?" "Both of you." This isn't YOUR conversation Rachel.

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Momentary weakness?

Oh my gosh, the good food too? Why does Cutter hit so many show Curtain parallels? He might torture, enslave, and kill people, but he's gonna get them a good meal first.

Good for you Doug, turning down the wine. I'm proud of him.

This is a sweet moment between Doug and Lovelace. I gotta say, since I'll be reacting to this section by section, it's nice that they have it broken up a little like this so I can reach a section and then get to a stopping point if I need to.

I'm just worried about who is going to die. These conversations feel like goodbyes.

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Minkowski. I know you miss your husband. But...yeah, ARE you ready to go back?

YEAH WE'RE DOING THIS! To borrow from Eris's words: "Let's beat the bad guys 🥳"

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Quiet Rachel.

LET'S GO MINKOWSKI. WHO CARES WHAT CUTTER AND PRYCE WANT?

Wait. Destroy a whole species?

Are they talking about humans?

...are they ecofascists? Eugenicists? Pryce is literally disabled, how the heck...

"Only stay if you have to." Well, it sounds like you all have to.

"Hera what did you say to her" "Something a friend once said to me" 🥰🥰🥰

"I'm starting to think these guys are my kind of stupid" GO JACOBI!

"Adorable corpses 🥰" Rachel you suck!

"Come with us. You're still people, you're still on our side, even if you don't think you are." Very true. What do you think Pryce and Cutter will do to YOU when they have what they want? They'll dispose of you too.

"You're allowed to make mistakes as long as at some point you admit that they're mistakes!" "I was wrong and people died. All I can do is not be wrong again" "You knew what you were getting into" "No I didn't. I didn't know I was getting into mind control and reducing people to nothing. There's a line. And you're almost out of chances to get on the right side of it." PREACH!

"There is no line. Forwards. Always forwards." FORWARDS TO WHAT RACHEL? WHY HAS NO ONE SHOT HER YET?

"Thank you, Daniel, and goodbye." Oh so that's how it is. Goodbye Kepler. I look forward to your last minute sacrifice.

Character arcs woven like a quilt.

"We're going to crush them" Yeah, let's do it!

A full reboot? Worth the risk? That kind of stuff always worries me.

Is this Maxwell's notes? It's hard to recognize the voice on the recording. "She really was something special" Oh it is Maxwell.

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Ah. Another flashback! Jacobi meeting Maxwell.

Looks like Kepler got an important text.

"Cool stuff with robots" good work Maxwell. The best scientists can always dumb it down.

"The Whiskey speech" 😂

"You're one of the best. You're gonna do great things. It's the last nice thing you'll ever hear from me. Except: you need anything I got you're back. No matter what happens, I've got your back. I'll take you up on that." 😭💔

Oh it's okay. Take my heart. I didn't need it.

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"Are they going to do the smart thing?" "Well who are we to deny them an agonizing death?" Shut it Cutter.

They put a tracker on Jacobi? See I knew Rachel was a snake. So is Kepler, but at least he's gonna take a bullet for someone or something. My money's on Jacobi, but I could be wrong.

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Yep. Eiffel logs everything.

"I never got the chance to say I'm sorry. YOUR DAD LOVES YOU, YOUR DAD LOVES YOU SO MUCH." 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

"Don't let anyone tell you that you can't do something. You can go so far. I wish I could be there to see it. I love you Ann. Always and forever."

AKJLS;DJFKL;SJF;ALSKDJFA;KD

Time to go? Oh. The comms room? Oh, right. Poor Doug.

"One more day, and then we're done." This is so sad.

Wait...what is happening? OH SHE LIED. SHE'S TAKING EIFFEL HOME TO PROTECT HIM. SO HE CAN SEE HIS DAUGHTER? DON'T DO THIS TO DOUG! DON'T DO THIS TO ME.

"Go home Eiffel, hug your daughter" OH HE CALLED HER RENEE!

This leaves me with so much feeling.

Eiffel can't leave he's the main character. Who will make pop culture references? Who will save the day through the power of random associations, luck, and good intentions?😭😭😭

I hate that they the bad guys know exactly what happened too.

"I'm so sick of this happening!" Use too Doug.

Oh "For god's sake just let me change the flight plan!" So that's what the F stands for. The lore I've been waiting for.

"People need to know what's coming?" Minkowski...I get why you did what you did, but HERA DIDN'T GET TO SAY GOODBYE.

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Is this Minkowski's flashback?

Oh when Minkowski met Hera.

"I heard units prefer to go by their serial numbers..." "I don't" Good for you Hera!

I love this. I love these flashbacks, but they just make everything so much more sad!

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Ah. More piano music. Does this mean we're back to the bad guys, or...?

Is this Cutter playing the piano?

"The Tempest. Do read a book sometime. Is this the best use of our time?" Pryce and Cutter are really the most toxic people.

"A storm is coming. And on the other side..." "Oh Brave New World." "That has such people in it."

Yes, Pryce and Cutter. People. As in humans. As in: NOT YOU.

"How have they decided to throw their lives away?" "By destroying the device"

WHAT DEVICE? What are you talking about?

Heck yeah a harpoon! I hope Cutter gets it.

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"This is Minkowski. I love schedules and musicals and that man who I married." 😂 1-2-3-4-5? It was a good guess Doug. Would have worked in my fanfic.

Okay here comes Victor...

...um what is happening? What is this?

...a surprise party? Sounds fun! 🪩🥳

Oh right, the bio tracker. I'm happy to see Jacobi pulled one over on him. Now shoot him! Please tell me that was Victor that got shot.

They...they trapped him in the room. "Tell me this before I kick your ass" Why on Earth would he ever tell you anything Victor?

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Okay, so they are blowing up Pryce and Cutter's evil device, but...what is the device? What ARE they doing? Did I miss it? I'm sure they're doing something to enslave or kill all of humanity, but I'd like the specifics.

"The Hephaestus has almost fallen out of the sky so many times, it's hard to believe it's happening." Well...the show isn't over until it's over.

Is this a Lovelace flashback? A date? A date with who? Oh, Hilbert. Not that kind of date then. Oh, this is her introducing Hilbert to the crew he's going to betray.

"Prudent to keep things formal" to avoid the guilt.

Selburg. Once again with the constant fake names. Dmitri. Matthew.

Though I think Miranda has always had hers.

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Yeah Doug. You've listened to her say it so many times. This is like me trying to drive in my hometown. No, I wasn't paying attention in the car as a kid, I was not the one doing the driving. I just zoned out and we got from point A to point B by magic.

Oh, Minkowski. "Get up and do it already. You can do it."

Yes you can Doug. You are the main character. You are the guy that's gonna swoop in at the last second when Cutter pulls one over one them. So you CAN do it. I believe in you, Eiffel.

"Victor Uniform Lemma Charlie Alpha November VULCAN" I knew it must stand for something! Good work Doug!

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Oh dear. More of Pryce and Cutter's marriage falling apart.

"Time to change the world." Or you could not. Maybe you could just not.

WHY IS THE DEVICE RUNNING? WHAT DEVICE? WHY DOES HE NEED TWO MINUTES?

Please explain this? Oh of course he has a speech.

Oh he's talking to the dear listeners, not the Hephaestus crew.

Ah. The Decima virus. Thanks a lot Hilbert. DEPLOY THROUGHOUT THE EARTH? He wants to cause a pandemic????

Automatic, can't be stopped, destruction of human race? But why would the aliens care? Oh because Cutter wants them to talk to HIM? But the aliens prefer Doug.

As do most others it would seem. Hurts, doesn't it, Cutter? All those years of experience and work, and yet, you still just can't have what he has, can you?

Ah. It's Bob. Did he just shock Bob? No temporal jumps, no disintegration?

"Remarkable and cold" No Bob, you saw Doug! It's just them. They don't need to be cold.

Willing to disrupt species survival??? What piece of tech do they want? Surrogates?

They want to fill the world with people they can control?

"You can't make duplicates of our species." Bob, they are worst than you can ever imagine.

"We're going to make better humans." "That is not the way that-" "Random part out of the equation" That's a bad idea. Do you know how evolution works? Do you know the negative side effects that have come out of selective breeding of animals? The unintended consequences? To quote Miranda from earlier in the episode: READ. A. BOOK.

"Our Humanity" Gross.

HOW ARE THEY ACCEPTABLE? IT'S MUSIC. WHY ARE YOU THAT DESPERATE FOR MUSIC?

Oh here is comes. Betraying Rachel and Warren.

OH TELL HIM BOB.

"Your brains can't handle it without modification. I cannot with my limitations. Do you have Doug Eiffel?"

Hahaha...hahahahahahaha....HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA..... 😂😂😂😂

Oh boy...oh Cutter is gonna snap. If only Doug had just kept going...

Oh wow okay Cutter has lost it. What happened to emotionally playing the piano and giving speeches about how the time had come?

oh geez no, Doug is back. Doug, no, they need you for the evil plans. This is a good idea, but very bad timing.

"He wouldn't" Oh he WOULD. He really really would.

Show 'em how it's done Dougie Boy!

"I'll get it" No you will NOT Miranda.

Kepler, now is a great time to betray Cutter and Rachel. A really good time.

Also is Victor dead? I'm trying to keep track of how many bad guys are gone.

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"You're the only person who can receive the data Pryce and Cutter want" Oh dear.

"With my life darling, with my life" 🥹💕

So what is Hera going to do?

"Lets make sure at least someone makes it through this" YOU ALL NEED TO MAKE IT.

"Let's go get our idiot back" That's the spirit baby!

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Oh dear. Jacobi. "Terrific for an SI-5." Wow.

"I'm gonna win!" I hope so Jacobi. But it sounds very not good.

Oh and here's Doug. And um...other Doug. Aka Bob.

Bob. Do not do this.

That was it? "You shall not call me again" "No Bob. I shall not."

THEY KILLED BOB.

"I hate loose ends"

I mean, I saw that coming, but dumb idea. I'm SURE Bob's family will be cool with that! Oh right, he just...recreates himself. But this has got to be trippy for Doug because Bob takes his form. Imagine watching a clone of yourself die.

"Pryce is not right?" DANG IT DOUG, I WAS GONNA USE THAT PUN IN MY FANFICTION AND NOW I CAN'T (WELL MAYBE I STILL WILL WE'LL SEE WHAT HAPPENS HERE).

"Let's make a deal 🥰" Wow Pryce is the worst. Again, very trippy how much she sounds like Doug.

Wait. GOING IN? What does. What does "going in" mean? Don't go in, I don't like going in?

Ah yes. Going into someone's mind. I've done that in my fics before too. Fun stuff. And um...it's because you're disorganized Doug, I hate to tell you.

"That was...that was...that was..." OH SHE DESTROYED THE MEMORY. OH SHE TOOK THE MEMORY?

This is...horrifying. She could take his daughter away. She could take Hera, Minkowski, and everyone and everything away.

HERA! HECK YEAH!

Oh my gosh is she actually here? Like as a person?

This is everything.

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Ah yes, confrontation with Cutter.

Cutter has modified his body or he has a magic shield.

He can catch bullets? Of course he can.

I wouldn't try hand to hand combat either. I bet he gave himself super strength.

There has to be a weak spot. He has to have a weakness. But what could it be...

...what is the opposite of a chai latte?

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Ah. Back to Jacobi.

Kepler this would be a GREAT TIME to come in and get your arc. "I'm not a good guy" oh Jacobi. What's happening now? Oh has he been pretending to lose this fight to buy them time? What is happening? It's hard to tell.

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She's always been interesting, Pryce! You’re just noticing now.

"You don't look like me." Disappointed, Pryce? Sad that she’s better than you?

And the fact that all these AI want human forms...this is so sad. They structured them based on human consciousness so of course they want human bodies and experiences, that's just cruel.

Wait Doug got beat up in the 2nd grade? The Star Wars Prequels? "I might be okay without that one" No one tell him about the sequels 😂😂😂

"Of course you can. You can do anything." 💕

"You and what army, 214?" The sounds in this really makes the fight sound super epic. One of my favorite parts of the whole thing.

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Oh gross not Rachel again. Why is she still here?

And Kepler. Dude, you wanna hurry it up? Grab your arc or go, the clock is a-ticking.

"We're changing what humanity can be." you suck Rachel.

Pulse beacon, half power? What does that mean? The signal wouldn't have made it back to Earth?

"We have tell Mr. Cutter." "Do we?" KEPLER THIS IS IT!

YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES!!!!

He gave you a chance, Rachel. He gave you a chance. "After all, I am still a person. I'm on Jacobi and Minkowski's side. Even if they don't think I am"

And even if they never know you were.

Is she gonna blast him out the airlock? Rachel, you're dying, it's over! You were wrong! The best thing to do is let him live!

He's literally drinking as he goes out the airlock. My...my wish came true. But this isn't how I wanted it to... why now? Why like this? 💔

It's a true sacrifice though. Because even though no one will ever know, he still did the right thing.

You became more than just a Whiskey Boy in the end Kepler. You became so much more.

Rachel, no so much. You were never anything. It doesn't matter if Warren was not as good as you. Because now you're both dead. And your life, well...you were never anyone. Or at least, you haven't been anything or anyone for a long, long, time. So be quiet now.

Silence at last.

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HOW CAN CUTTER GET HER TO POINT HER GUN AT MINKOWSKI? WHAT...WHAT DID THEY DO?

Well this isn't good.

Ah yes. Back to Jacobi. Looks like Kepler's not coming to save him. But at least he took care of Rachel.

Explosives? Fireworks? Oh this is a party! 🎆🎇🧨

Well that was a grand surprise party! But um...does this mean Victor and Jacobi are dead now?

Ah back to Lovelace and Minkowski!

"It's...side wave radiation!" Okay, thank you Cutter, now we know what we need to shut down.

"Humans who do exactly what we tell them to do" "You're crazy"

Yeah. He is literally crazy.

OH SHE SHOT HER??? Oh no....Oh no please tell me SOMEONE makes it out of this.

What really did happen the night of Doug's junior prom? Sounds interesting.

Fishing with Dad? Okay these memories are getting personal.

Wait, what did Doug do?

What are they going to do? Oh they could delete the memories Bob put in there. But they need to find them before Pryce.

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Shut up about the stomach wound Cutter. No one cares. This isn't rewriting a person. And THAT'S NOT WHY PEOPLE CARED ABOUT HER YOU IDIOT. And without your intelligence and tech, who. are. YOU, CUTTER?

Renee Minkowski! YES! Tell him!

Lovelace you can fight this. I know you can.

Shut it Cutter. No one cares.

"Sooner or later, you're gonna do as your told" And sooner or later, you are gonna lose everything, Cutter.

"You really think I'm afraid of you?" "THE BEAUTIFUL THING IS I DON'T NEED YOU TO BE"

Please tell me they have the harpoon gun.

IT WAS THE HARPOON GUN? OH HECK YEAH!

"That's...not...how...this is suppose to..."

Yes, it is Cutter. Like you said. You know how these stories end. The good guys win. They might lose a lot in the process, but, they win.

Is he dead now, like, for real dead? I don't want to celebrate too early but MAN what a way to go.

He and Rachel even died in similar ways to. It's like they short circuited when they realized they didn't win.

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Ah Pryce. "I don't need to beat you. No matter how much I want to, no matter how much you deserve it, it wouldn't change anything. What I need to do is make sure you're not going to hurt anyone else again ever." That's right!

"I'm not going to hurt you." OH SAY THE CLIP YOUR WINGS LINE COME ON COME ON COME ON.

"Clip your wings a little. Goodbye Dr. Pryce."

So...Hera's gone now. So what is about to happen?

Oh no. Is she...is she gonna delete both their memories?

"Bye bye to my memories?" Oh Doug, oh poor Doug. His daughter, everything...oh Doug this sacrifice will not be forgotten. 🫡 This is so Milligan coded of him (@/tmbs mutuals).

"You can't. Don't do this." "Oooo...sorry buddy, we gotta" YEAH THROW IT BACK AT HER EIFFEL!

And goodbye. I hope you have a second chance with your daughter. I hope you never remember the trauma. All a bad dream. All a bad dream.

"Do you have any idea what you've...I'm sorry...what was I saying...where...where am I?" Oh my gosh the way her voice changed...and she apologized. Oh my gosh. She's literally a new person.

So...memories gone? Where does this leave her? Oh this will be fun in fanfics. Imagine having no memories, and people are weird about it, and then finding out that before you were basically the worst person to ever exist. How would you even mentally cope with that?

"Yeah commander, it's going." No, Doug! Doug!

"It was an honor, sir" Oh this is so sad.

"Hera...Hera I...I..." You know Hera. You were in his mind. Please tell me you know.

Oh. He's gone. 💔

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WHY IS RACHEL BACK I THOUGHT WE TOOK CARE OF THAT?

Oh it's her and Eiffel meeting, okay.

"Are you just asking if I'm the commander? Yes." I love Minkowski and Doug's friendship.

"Never use one word when ten will do" oh Doug...never change. Even if your memories are gone, I hope you find yourself again.

He didn't know you couldn't smoke in space? Oh Doug...at least now you can quit.

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"Do I know you?" Yes Doug. Yes you do.

She's briefing him. He...he doesn't remember Star Wars???

Well. At least he gets to watch it all again!

Wait. What's happening to the station? Are they...are they going into the star?

Oh no. So it's up to the dear listeners to save them, or...they just die here. Heroes. Heroes that everyone on Earth thought were dead already.

Oh she's rebooting now.

"Should we be doing something?" Oh did Renee pass out?

So...is Doug on the ship alone without his memories? What's happening?

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Where is Renee now? Lovelace? Where? What? The Urania? How?

Did they leave Pryce on board? Did Jacobi get out?

Oh good Hera, Minkowksi, and Lovelace made it. Jacobi did it! Nice work, Jacobi. Oh gosh he's so dramatic 😂

So I assume Doug made it too?

"What about Kepler" "No." Oh so, they must have found Rachel and discovered what he did. "You can't save everyone I suppose"

But you did save him, Jacobi. You did save Whiskey Boy.

And then where is Doug?

Oh he's listening to himself.

"I was a jerk" There's a lot worse things you can be, Doug.

It does make you wonder. If you looked at your life with a blank slate, what would you think? How would you be kinder to yourself? How would you be more critical?

"Am I still that same person?" If you want to be, Doug. If you want to be.

And what happened to Pryce? Please tell me you did not give her to the dear listeners.

IS THIS PRYCE?

Oh Hera and Pryce. "Your voice is like mine, isn't it?" "Nice to meet you, Hera." Oh. Oh my gosh. Pryce calling her Hera.

"And I'm...I'm going to tell you a very, very long story about the two of us, okay?"

I hope this ends well...

...please be a good guy, Pryce.

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Hey guys. Guys. Quick question.

Why are there 10 minutes left?

I um...I like this ending. They're going back to Earth, all is well. Please tell me nothing bad happens.

What happened with Pryce? Hera hasn't glitched at all? She did it. She conquered her fear. GO HERA! But um...what about Pryce? Is she...is she good?

Minkowski needs to find her husband. And yeah...you guys have a lot to figure out.

Lovelace...yep. Take Goddard down. Good idea. Explain to your friends you're an alien with extended lifespan...might want to break that gently.

Take who out?

Oh the ship. Is this it? They're going home? Please tell me they're actually going home. Don't tease me like this.

Oh right, what will Hera do now? I'm sure you'll find something.

And yeah. Doug might not know who he is, but he knows there are people he should see. And then...he'll figure it out. They'll all figure it out. "Am I still Doug Eiffel? I'm not sure. Want to find out together?"

Yes. I love this. 🥰

I also love how it connects to "will I miss you, when you go away forever Doug?" Yes, but he's not gone Hera. He's not gone.

----------

Five minutes left. So...what is that for? Do we finally get to meet Doug's daughter and Minkowski's husband...or…

That was wolf359! Oh it’s just the credits!

Great ending. But...wait. No wait. I'm confused hang on.

How did Jacobi escape from Victor to get the Urania? How is Hera going to survive on Earth? How did they fix those wounds? If the Hephaestus went into the star...

Wait. These aren't more alien copies are they? Oh wait, no Hera's here, sorry y'all I panicked for a moment. They duplicate human lives, but as far as I know, not AI. Also, if this was a happy dream sequence, why would Pryce be there? Okay, phew, we're good. We're...finally good.

And even if they are alien copies...the process will take 14,000 years. So. For the rest of their lives, at least. Especially since...they're still using Lovelace to spy on Earth. For the next 14,000 years. But I guess that’s a problem for future generations.

Okay. Great ending. Thoughts:

Cutter got what he deserved. So did Rachel, but I feel a bit sadder that she never realized the pointlessness of her life until it was too late (and really not even then). Also love that Cutter's original last name was "Newman" since he keeps making himself into "new men".

Kepler's sacrifice was great no notes. I hope he enjoyed the Whiskey.

Blessie should have come back, and in fanfic, I will find a way to make this happen.

Eris should have come back, and in fanfic, I will find a way to make this happen.

Are the Dear Listeners just going to leave Earth alone now? If the Hephaestus went into the star...does that mean they can make Rachel and Cutter copies? Because I don't like that...

I love that the aliens weren't the biggest threat in the end and Cutter was always the real monster.

Is Pryce cool now? She doesn't want revenge, does she? Like what do you even do with her at that point? (I have plans for this, don't worry).

How do they dismantle or repurpose Goddard? Cutter probably has guys still loyal to him on Earth or people who are gonna try to be the next Cutter now that he's out of the picture. How do you deal with them?

Okay...so the decima virus can be used for great good and great evil. Cutter apparently had stations with it set up all over the Earth. I hope no one stumble across one of those anytime soon. What exactly are they going to do about decima? It's still swimming about in Eiffel's blood.

Is Minkowski's journalist husband going to blow this case wide open? I hope that after her brief phone call with his secretary, Cutter didn't kill him to keep the rumors from spreading.

Will the families of all the other astronauts that died ever get closure? I know we don't want this getting out and causing panic, but they deserve answers too.

When. Is. The. Empty. Man. Going. To. Show. Up???? /j /It was Cutter the whole time because he has no humanity

Well that was fun. Again, the fanfic will probably take a good long while (I put off a lot in order to listen to this ending), but I look forward to mapping it out.

Once again, thank you all for listening along with me. This has been fun.

Now, to figure out how to unblock those pesky tags...

[rosielav]

Now onto Wolf359!

On episode 3, I like it so far. I have luckily forgotten everything everyone has ever told me about it, and I'm not looking back at my (strangely popular; thanks Tumblr) podcast rec post to get that info again, so...

Here's hoping its a semi-horror podcast :3 I love a good audiolog!! And I love when things get spooky.

No spoilers please!! Don't worry, I'll get through it fairly quickly, so I'll be happy to discuss and/or yell at anyone who loves it when I'm done :D

[cirque-dhomosexual]

I don't know what crack and ambrosia they put into this song but holy shit Paradise Valley by Honey and the Sting is so fucking good.

[isabellovelaces]

Wolf359 characters as reaction pics i got in my phone

Eiffel

Minkowski

Translation: be strong, lioness

Hera

Hilbert

Lovelace

Kepler

Maxwell

Jacobi

[hephaestuscrew]

Hi! im relistening to Wolf359 again and upon listening to Pan-Pan(ep29) ive come to notice a bit of a parallel (?) to Need to Know (ep35). Minkowshi not telling the crew about the cracks on the fixtures and how in less than 100 DAYS that the whole station could go down no matter how many repairs they make due to not wanting to add more weight and hopelessness to an already high stressed situation vs Kepler not telling anyone shit bc he doesn't see that as none of their business (I may be overlooking something tho, i have to relisten to that ep once i get off work)

I'm trying to see if there's an actual connection there or am i on my tin foil hat biases again.

Thanks for the ask! I ended up writing far more than I expected about this, so I'll put my response below a cut.

TLDR: Minkowski and Kepler make a similar choice to withhold information, but for very different reasons. Minkowski is motivated by her responsibility to protect her crew. Kepler is motivated by his desire to maintain his own power. This relates to their different ideas about leadership.

I think there's an interesting comparison to the extent that these are both cases in which people in authority positions have to make decisions about who to share critical information with. Minkowski and Kepler both withhold information from their respective crews that is very relevant to their future survival. They both use the phrase "need to know" in their justification for doing this. When Hilbert asks why Minkowski hasn't told them about the cracks, Minkowski's first response is "Because… you didn't need to know." Kepler talks about the idea of 'need to know' quite a bit, but perhaps the most notable instance for this comparison is when he tells Jacobi "That mission parameter [about the potential for alien duplicates] was marked for black archive clearance. Need to know. And you didn't need to know."

But I think the similarities between Minkowski and Kepler's approaches to withholding information pretty much end there. I believe that Minkowski is telling the truth when she says she didn't tell Hilbert and Lovelace about the cracks because they'd "suffered enough". She doesn't tell them because she doesn't want them to lose hope. She doesn't tell them even though, as Hera says, doing so might make wrangling them easier.

For Minkowski, knowing something that she doesn't tell the rest of the crew is something that weighs on her. I think you can hear it in her voice when she tells Hera that she won't tell Hilbert and Lovelace about the cracks "not today". I think you can hear it when she breaks down towards the end of Pan-pan ("Just like the cracks, and the station just keeps falling apart. And there's nothing I can do, and I am sorry.")

In contrast, I don't think we are given any reason to believe that Kepler feels a sense of regret or conflict about the knowledge he doesn't share with the rest of the crew. Of course, he regrets the consequences of losing Jacobi's loyalty and his control of the station. But Kepler's reaction to Jacobi challenging him on his secrecy is focused on standing by his decision and justifying it. Unlike Minkowski, Kepler refers to Goddard rules when defending his decision not to share information. He didn't tell his crew that Lovelace was probably an alien duplicate because he believed that doing so wouldn't have supported his objectives. That's sufficient reason for him.

I think this is actually a good illustration of a key difference between Minkowski and Kepler's attitudes towards leadership. For Minkowski, leadership is first and foremost about responsibility - the responsibility to be a good Commander and keep her crew safe. (Other leadership priorities are more prominent for her early on, but by season 2 I believe that's her primary motivation and I think it's always been a key part of her concept of leadership.) In contrast, for Kepler, leadership is first and foremost about power - the power to push mission progress forward, the power to order and manipulate and threaten in service of the bigger picture. And information is power, so why would he share it if he doesn't have to?

Those contrasting ideas of leadership underlie their choices when they withhold information from their crews. Minkowski doesn't tell her crew everything because she wants to protect them from losing hope. Kepler doesn't tell his crew everything because he wants to be the one holding all the cards - he'll only reveal information to others when doing so supports his aims.

To come back to your original question, I think there's a connection here, but it's less that the writers are deliberately encouraging these comparisons, and more that Minkowski and Kepler are both people in leadership positions in a life-threatening environment, and that inevitably necessitates decisions about who to share information with. And very different leadership priorities can motivate similar choices in not telling people things they would want to know.

[benevolenterrancy]

hi!! sorry to bother you about this, i was just wondering why you deleted all of your wolf359 fics? feel free to ignore this ask

Anon you nearly gave me a heart attack 😅 I had to scramble to check my account before I realized what must have happened.

They're all there but I actually locked all my fics a few weeks back because of the AI scraping. I don't know if it does any good - that ship has rather sailed after all - and I'll probably give in and unlock them again but it was an angry gut reaction to what was going on.

If you log on to ao3, they *should* all still there, just hidden from prying bot eyes ^^

[transarchivist]

(id in alt)

[thesnadger]

Note: fxngirl4ever sent this ask but tumblr’s been fukkin wild with readmores and I had to delete the original response:

It's been really fun scrolling through your Wolf359 reactions! Especially the Si5 crew seeing as I have some conflicting views on them myself. Any thoughts on them individually?

Thoughts aplenty! (Spoilers below)

(Note that I’m just past 46, taking a break to catch up on MBMBAM cause I need something a lil more upbeat for a bit.)

Maxwell is absolutely the one I have the most complicated/positive feelings for. Her storyline with Hera was really interesting and she cared enough for me to feel conflicted. 

I never, ever, ever trusted her, never had any doubt that she would rewrite Hera’s brain, pausing only to say “I’m sorry” before immediately crossing that line (one’s she’s absolutely crossed before and would again and again.) But it was impossible to get through Memoria without some feelings for her, and hearing her advocate for Hera to Kepler did go a long way.

That said, I never got too attached because I had zero doubt she was going to turn. I knew the depth of her understanding of Hera’s psyche would only make the inevitable betrayal worse. That bit in Hera’s recruitment where Cutter says “let’s give this to Doctor--” and gets cut off? He was 300% going to say “Maxwell.” While Hera was bonding with her I was like “this is the person who would have rewritten her brain to make her happy with her appointment if she hadn’t accepted quickly enough.”

I mentioned that Maxwell’s death was satisfying to me, and it was. Here’s the thing. It’s not even that the SI5 agents were constantly snickering about how they had all the power and would kill everyone without hesitation if they caused trouble (and had done that sort of thing before.) Whatever, I’ve been hyperfocusing on TMA for the past seven months, I can get behind a fun, charming monster. 

What made me want them to get taken down more than anything was the smugness. Their certainty that the crew could never touch any of them, even when all the circumstances pointed to it. And Jacobi in episode 45 just feels like the epitome of that. Episode 45 was like:

Jacobi: Hey loser, you know how you just heard a member of your crew die? I’m gonna kill another member of your crew while you listen if you don’t surrender yourself for torture and death right now.

Minkowski: If you kill Hilbert I’ll kill Maxwell.

Jacobi: Haha whatever (kills Hilbert)

Minkowski: (kills Maxwell)

Jacobi: surprised_pikachu.png

I have found that (so far, he’s still alive so we’ll see where his story goes) Jacobi aggravates me more than any of the others. 

I get it, he’s been working under Kelper for a long time, there’s no question that being in that position will mess you up. The line about “I’m going to be as smart as she needs me to be” might sound like a ‘they have each others’ backs and care about each other’ thing. But I also connected it to the story he told of Kelper locking the door so they couldn’t flee. Jacobi is totally in the mindset of “I will be able to do this thing because this is the thing I am required to do," which of course, works until it doesn’t. So I get it.

But man, in practice it’s so aggravating for him to constantly be like “stop whining and do your job, you big babies” lash out when he’s put under an unusual amount of stress, then two episodes later be back to “god stop complaining about being sent into unreasonable danger you’re such WHINERS.” 

Which makes it a satisfying plot development that Maxwell died and he lived. Like. Now YOU have to live with the feeling you kept gleefully inflicting on other people. Stew in that and maybe have some character development about it why don’t you, idiot.

As for Kepler, I don’t have a lot of strong feelings about him. Besides “smug” and “ruthless/sadistic” and “uses anger as a tool for intimidation, but may potentially actually have anger issues, it’s unclear” it’s hard to get a bead on his characteristics, and we don’t really know anything about his life before this job. I see him less as a character and more as a box of interesting secrets and plot developments. Interesting, but only because he’s full of Lore.

[scissorsisters]

i am LOVING your reactions to wolf359, it's one of my favorite podcasts!

IM GLAD LOL I'm enjoying it

[nobodysdaydreams]

I FINISHED SEASON 1 OF WOLF359 AND THIS IS NOT OKAY (Reaction to Episodes 11-13, plus mini episode 1)

So basic info on the tags and how to follow my reactions below, but I'm honestly too emotional to type much more than that. What the heck was even that? I gotta get going, so I'll let past Bods of a few minutes ago do the talking under the "Keep Reading Button" but YIKES this was a LOT.

I currently have Wolf359 Tags blocked to avoid spoilers and will try my best to react blindly. I also made this meme to describe my recent feelings.

Tagging the mutuals who got me invested in this, and if you want to be tagged or untagged from these posts, lmk, or you can follow my blog or simply follow the tag "#bods wolf359 reactions". Anyone who has followed me for a while knows my updates are inconsistent, so I apologize in advance for that.

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs

So for these last few episodes, I'm just gonna live react since I have the time to sit down. Sorry for inconsistent formatting.

Episode 11: Am I Alone Now?

Um... Hilbert? A grey door where no one ever goes??? Well...where does it go? "Open in Emergency When You're Alone"... what does that mean?

Oh the joke about the genie. I've heard this one before: "I wish my friends were back with me". Yep, that's it.

Wait. Wait. Is that what the door does? Does it somehow...bring them back? What is this metaphor trying to suggest? Or...does it only make you think they're back? So that you don't go crazy? Or is it a door that leads outside the ship? Like...a door that gives you the option to, for lack of a better word, "give up" if the others die and you're left alone in space? Because that would also be dark.

Okay, Hilbert, I agree, fear can be adaptive. Uh, not sure about the gun and war thing, that's not exactly what I meant...wait bombs? Hilbert, no, you SHOULD be afraid of yourself.

Working on the fear of death? Uh...Hilbert? Are you uh...working on reanimating corpses in space, because that sounds like a bad idea to me.

"Alone should be afraid of us instead there is a door incase I am ever alone." Well what about the others?

I agree Hilbert, alone can be a good time to focus, but I gotta say, not sure I like how you're spending your valuable alone time.

"The scary part is the part of your mind that whispers back: how can you be sure?".

Oh. Now what's interesting about that quote is that in the "Alone should be afraid of us" sentence it personifies alone. The only way to really be comfortable being alone is if you are confident that you are stronger than whatever might be there if you aren't alone. But how can you ever know 100% that you are stronger than the unknown? Also there are sound effects that sound like someone moving about. Don't like that.

Is it Blessie?

"Someone must think they are alone when they are not, there must be monsters underneath someone's bed". Okay, Hilbert, clearly going for the creepy quote of the episode award.

Why is there knocking?

Uh...Empty Man?

Um...why is WHO here Hilbert? What other missions???? Was Hilbert on another mission? Hello???? Hilbert? EXPLAIN????

"You weren't here last time, but now you are here waiting for the day, open in case of emergency, open only when you are alone."

Does the empty man want them to open the door? When they think he's not around? Why?

Uh...I don't think that joke is very funny Hilbert. And no, I'm not laughing, you're dodging my questions.

Oh now we're onto Hera. I like this. We see a lot of Doug alone but not the others.

Yeah, Hera you should NOT trust the code Hilbert gives you. I wouldn't be surprised if he's experimenting on you too.

HERA. WHAT DO YOU "SENSE UNSEEN?" And yeah...Hera I know how programming works. If I don't unblock the wolf359 tag, tumblr.com isn't gonna just show me wolf359 posts, or tell me "hey here's one you should look at". But let's just say, hypothetically, that one of my mutuals draws some wolf359 season 1 fan art that doesn't spoil anything for me. Then I would trust that they might message me, and tell me that it's okay to view their wonderful art, but I won't know that unless they tell me because the tag is blocked. Not the best metaphor, but the point still stands, Hera I guess you don't HAVE to tell them about the "empty man" roaming the ship unless they ask you for that information. But as their friend, you probably should. What motivation would you have for hiding this? Hera seems to have very human attributes in terms of her ability to have social connections. She also seems to care about them to some degree. At least, she seems fond of Doug and has some tension with Mincowski and Hilbert. She's pretending to talk to Doug, which is a very human thing to do.

Ah yes. Good for you for finding loopholes in your programming Hera. I like riddles too. But...what exactly are you going to do with these riddle answers you've acquired? Are you going to help the rest of the crew? Blessie? The empty man? Or do you have your own agenda?

"Somedays I wonder if I'll miss you after you go away forever Doug." Aw, Hera. 🥺.

"I doubt it". No, I think you will Hera. The fact that you, a robot, are even wondering about missing Doug makes me think you will. Especially since you could, theoretically, live until the heat death of the universe, which is a very long time to be alone.

Wait. WAIT. The storm is happening on a part of the spectrum that their minds can't process...is that what the empty man is? Is that why they can't see him? But Hera can't see it either so her programming must either not be able to see it or it's being blocked. But weirdly enough, only visually it seems. Huh.

Hera seems frustrated with humanity, but also seems to care about them, maybe envy them a little bit. I love this level of complexity with her. "Once the game is over, I'll come up with some names for these colors." Yikes, Sophie, when you said that I was writing the Whisperer very similarly to Hera, I didn't realize it was gonna be that spot on, but okay, especially with her calling this a “game”. It’s kinda like a darker version of what I’m writing or at least, it seems to be leaning darker, probably because it’s adult media. It also makes me wonder who Hera's creator is and what they want, or maybe that just doesn't matter in this story.

"Someday. After you've all gone away..." Um. Hera. Did you open the door?

Or are you the genie in this metaphor?

Ah now we're with Doug.

INCINERATED? What sort of psych evaluation is this? And these questions are NOT standardized for space. When coming up with psych evaluation materials, you need context. Answers that are normal in a warzone or in space are not normal in everyday life.

WHY IS HE SEARCHING FOR ALIEN LIFE IF HE DOESN'T WANT TO BE HERE? Doug, I know pizza hut might not be paying much, but you gotta follow your passion, and this clearly isn't it.

10 things you miss about earth and not one person? No one? No family? No friends?

"Great listener"/"I empathize too much" ok Doug.

Hm. Not too sure about Doug's answers. Honesty is only overrated when you're not the one being lied to Doug.

It also makes me wonder what you really miss about Earth.

Wait. Mission = Punishment? Spaceship = Prison? Is Doug...are they...are they doing this because they are completing a criminal sentence? If so, I can see how Hilbert and Mincowski got assigned to this as a punishment, they have science and military backgrounds, but what on Earth is Doug's story? "He was a former tech genius kid who burnt out got into drugs and alcohol, worked at pizza hut, did a crime, and now they sent him to space?" And since when do space missions fulfill court mandated community service? Also Doug I think technically has arms training, because if I recall correctly, Mincowski gave him a gun but refused to give one to Hilbert. Like...who are you Doug? What is your deal?

Alone...again. Yeah, just Doug and the voices in his head. Forgot about those. There's a lot to keep track of for a small cast of characters.

Let's do a quick run down before we hear from the commander:

Doug Eiffel- former pizza hut employee, no family/friends to speak of, possibly serving prison sentence, apparently knows how to use a gun and a lot about communications

Dr. Hilbert- doing VERY unethical space experiments, sees himself as a genius despite being a huge liability whose mind was nearly over taken by a killer plant. Obviously knows SOMETHING the others don't, so I don't trust him or his spinal fluid stealing ways.

Commander Mincowski- stereotypical by the books commander, I like her, but she also has a ton of unanswered questions and vague backstory so ???

Hera- seems nice, I wish people treated her better but also clearly keeping secrets from the others including Doug who is her friend so Hera what are you doing?

Percival The Plant aka. "Percy" aka. The Blessed Eternal aka. "Percival B. Eternal" aka. "Blessie" aka "Specimen 34"- a plant that thinks of itself as a god. Where did it come from? Even if it did take over the ship, what is it's plan? No one knows.

The Empty Man???- may or may not exist, seems to be off the visible spectrum even for robots and AI. He's hungry or as the messages put it "the empty man hungers" and that's about all we know about him. What we don't know is what his food source is, and I find that rather troubling. Maybe Doug can make him some pizza. Oh, and one other thing: he knocks. Which...is surprisingly courteous behavior from a dangerous man that can't be seen. But why would they open the door for him, unless...oh. Unless they are so desperate not to be alone that they embrace the empty man. But like...how would that even...I don't even know. Also apparently the empty man was asleep, because the first message said he'd awoken. Awoken from what? Hyper sleep? Was he in the box? Apparently he can see them even if he can't be seen, and I don't like that.

The voices in Doug's head- they say "he's not the first". Which is kind of crazy, because Dr. Hilbert was talking about "other missions". So um...what other missions? Who are the others? Who are the voices? Is something being transmitted into Douglas' head?

Captain Lovelace and that scientist lady (don't remember her name) from the sealed off lab- are they still alive? Were they on a previous mission? Why did they want to make spiders bigger? What was the point of these experiments? I SWEAR I saw people posting about Lovelace before I blocked the tag, which makes me think she's important.

The Spiders- presumed dead. Let's hope so.

The thing in the box- weird that the box was 953, which is 359 backwards. Weird that it had a heartbeat. Weird that it was labelled "for Doug Eiffel" with no other information. Odd that there were so many other seemingly nonsensical boxes in that room.

Whoever sent the “Empty Man” messages. Because I’m starting to suspect it might not have been command and there might not have been a psychological experiment. Which means the messages were meant for someone, but whoever sent them didn't want the others to know about it. ...but who were the messages for? Hilbert? Hera? Hilbert? ...Blessie???

Whoever sent that jazz music earlier. It's good music, but why?

Also important to note that multiple characters on this list might be the same people, people pretending to be the same people, or different versions of the same character due to cloning or time travel experiments thanks to weird space magic and also Dr. Hilbert.

Now let's here from the captain.

I um...I wouldn't call the talent show a success. Dr. Hilbert didn't get to make the ice cream! We never even got to find out what everyone's favorite flavor was 😥

3 minutes. Okay. Let's see what Captain Mincowski says.

I wonder who she's talking to.

Yeah, the plant being, it's weird that that's not a priority here, I agree Captain.

Huh. The weather is weird. VERY weird that Hilbert is ignoring it, and VERY weird that he has human tissues samples and jars with dead things after giving a monologue about trying to conquer death. Don't like that one little bit.

Soap? Hilbert you need to get better at lying. And yeah, captain given that he's talking about "other missions", I think he might have been lying for longer than anyone realizes...

Things moving around and turning up in odd places...it seems the empty man and Blessie (one of the two) enjoy furniture rearranging...yeah I do think there's more than the three of you, my list had at least 10 with some possible overlap.

I'm sorry what. The station changes? THE DOOR TO A SECTION JUST VANISHED? Terrarium? That might be Blessie, but still...that's weird. Eiffel...huh. Unsure if this is a case of him being so absent minded he didn't notice or remember the terrarium, or if he legit can't remember. Wait Wednesday started over? Clocks turned back at midnight? FOOD RETURNED? Okay you can change clocks, but you can't...okay time is being warped now. Maybe. Possibly. This is gonna be one of those things where you don't know how much is in their heads and how much is actually happening right? Oh boy. But also...how can one remember a time loop and the others don't...unless they are all remembering different loops...oh goodness, is this like Netflix's Dark, where I'm gonna have to start drawing maps or something?

"I don't know if there's anyone else I can trust": yeah, commander, and with the others in the same boat, it looks like you all really are alone.

Wait "MARRIED ME?" Who is she calling? Aw. Happy Birthday. That's sad but sweet. I hope she makes it home to whoever that is, but...for some reason I doubt.

Also...with the time loop stuff...is that what they mean by saying Doug isn't the first? Is Hilbert trying to escape the time loop is that why he remembers the other missions? What are the missions for? What does Hera know? Man I gotta stop doing these as study breaks or I'm never gonna quit.

But. Wait wait. Okay, I know I’ve had about 600 different insane theories already, but one more: I don’t know who sent the empty man messages. But. Is the empty man… a vessel for someone? Hilbert was talking about cheating death, time warp stuff is happening, maybe this is an invention of future Hilbert. If it came from the box, it might be for Doug. Like a… backup body for his consciousness or an… invisible clone or something? It makes the “you’re not the first” stuff make sense too. Doesn’t explain Hera’s behavior or why Doug is in space, or why the empty man is hungry and knocking, but… you know what never mind idk where I was going with this one.

I think I'll react to the rest tomorrow, because it's late, and I'm tired.

Episode 12: Deep Breaths

Update: It is tomorrow. :)

Why so doom and gloom Doug? Oh it's Christmas. Well someone's a bit of a scrooge. What else besides celebrating a nice holiday Doug? What doesn't the commander remember?

No Doug, don't hint at stuff, explain it. Normalize explaining things.

Doug. A cigarette cannot be all you are living for. You need help. You all need help.

Don't cry for me Argentina? Do not go gentle into that good night?

Doug is so dramatic. I'd hate him more, but I'm in this picture, and I don't like it.

Hilbert. Why do you need him for your experiment?

DOUG DO NOT LIT THE CIGARETTE.

Hera tell him.

Everyone needs to listen to Hera more. And also ask her more questions.

Oh boy another recording!

Sounds like music, less clear this time...oh. A band!

Aw, Hera remembered his birthday! 🥺 Wait...were those words via the transmission!

Oh Hilbert hush up.

Why would it matter if they were all music or always old transmissions from the 10s or 20s?

Hilbert. Okay. Look, 7.8 light years away, I get that...but...now hear me out...isn't it possible that you could be picking up music on a station that plays music from an older decade? Like if I picked up the song "Let it be" by the Beatles my first thought would not be "Hey! That song didn't come out 8 years ago. ALIENS." it would be "oh we pick up a 60s/70s radio station". Now obviously something deeper probably IS going on here, but still a bit of a leap.

Uh. Making a return trip to...where?? Also this is some pretty clear music. Also good quote "When you eliminate the impossible, whatever is left no matter how unlikely must be true."

Also I recognize the music playing. Is that...hold up is that Church music? For Christmas? Wait now it sounds like a ballet?

Um...what is that.

...and why did it happen as soon as they talked about trying to find the aliens?

Let's see. A little weird that the station can receive transmission better than it can send. 40 light years away? That's pretty far.

And um...I don't know if I'd be so optimistic about this. We still have a lot of unanswered questions.

What is lock down protocol 24c and what is indigo39? Hilbert. HILBERT. Were you lying about the aliens to experiment on Doug Hilbert?

Oh poor Hera. Alpha victor? What... how does Hilbert have all these codes? Why can't she let Mincowski in? Hilbert. Are you taking over the ship? Is this a one man mutiny? It is treason. WHY DOES THIS ALTER THE MISSION? LAST HALF HOUR OF OXYGEN? NO NO NO NO NO!

Yeah Eiffel, he IS crazy.

Oh no Hera.

Minutes? How does he have a way to contact Earth? Who is YOUR superior Hilbert? The devil? He must be since you are RUINING CHRISTMAS AND DOUGLAS' BIRTHDAY THAT NO ONE BUT HERA REMEMBERED. How hard is it to save your evil plans until after the holidays? How hard is it not to betray a man on his birthday?

Hera. Hera PLEASE tell me you found a way to win the game. PLEASE tell me you found a way around this.

...Hera?

Uh-oh.

Episode 13: Gas Me Twice

Well that was a bummer. I swear, Mincowski better not die she has a family.

I hate Hilbert so much. Dude is the WORST.

Wait! The oxygen mask! For the cigarette! Douglas your stupidity has saved you again!

...oh my gosh I really am in this picture, and I don't like it.

Oh no. Hera. Hera you need to help him. Yes Douglas! Have faith in her! Even though she's actively withholding information, she still seems nice! HERA! It hurts her? Oh no... oh Hera no. 🥺

22 minutes of air? Well, at least she's still alive.

Incoming pulse beacon? Interesting...

Hephestus station please respond? ...Who is Cutter???

Contingency scenarios? Data series? Transmission from deep space? Origin source? Who are these people? WHAT ARE THEY LOOKING FOR?

Oh...wait why would he know about Eiffel being alive? Haha...oh Eiffel. This was a good plan. But you might have wanted to get a little more information from him.

Death was no immediate? Okay so Hilbert was under orders to kill, but it seems Doug is his own experimental side project? Interesting...

Oh dear. A fire. Looks like you have to let Hera have control back.

Yes! Mincowski is still alive! :)

YES HERA! Emergency response overrides it! For 20 minutes? Great. Kill or capture Hilbert now.

MADE HIM DO WHAT? NO HERA NO!

HERAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Restarting... no. No. Hera. You killed her. 😢😟🥺

This gif I found pretty much approximates my feelings:

HILBERT NEEDS TO DIE.

Shut up Hilbert. No one wants to hear you speak.

Oh...hello Mincowski :)

NOW BEAT HIM UP!

And yeah...it's okay Mincowski. A lot has happened. Christmas was ruined. You lost a crewmate. It's okay to not be okay.

Can you hear me? Well Hera did say she could always hear him. Maybe a part of her mind got saved somewhere. At least, we can always hope.

Lobotomized her? No you need to fix her. 🥺

Hilbert you bastard. I don't swear much or at all on this blog, but if there was ever a time, it is now. And um... given the plant situation and the other mysterious stuff on the ship...look I don't support murder, but maybe you could just send Hilbert off by himself in a little pod and let nature take its course.

You deserved a good dinner Mincowski. Aw, Doug is 32. Happy Birthday Doug.

Hm. A communication from Hilbert's commanders. This is awkward. But better open it. And yeah, you both deserve answers.

But who is on the other line?

...Why does it sound like an telephone?

WHAT.

How dare. How dare they end on such a cliffhanger?

Mini Episode 1: Are space suits itchy?

So I'm not sure what this is, but it's on my podcast list as the last episode of season 1, so I'm gonna listen to it? Let me know if it's not canon or something, but hopefully it will be nice, even if I don't get any answers.

Aw, third grade questions. "What do you do when you're crewmate betrays you?"

IDIOTIC QUESTION? Doug what is up with your family? Be nice to Stephanie, it was a fair question.

Yeah, no don't see your doctor. He's nuts. I feel like I might be listening to his out of order. Which is a good thing. Otherwise Doug would be on the podcast telling third graders to not call their doctor lest the doctor try to kill him.

Oh boy the censorship 😂. Mincowski is the better person for this.

Well that was a quick one, but nice! Oh okay, so it was like a mini episode that aired during a break, okay. Well I hope that soon enough I'll be able to listen to more. Because I need answers. Hera needs to get better. And Hilbert needs to go to jail. I want his degrees revoked! I want him rotting in the slammer! I want the world to look upon him with nothing but contempt and disgust!

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this, see you all next time.

Wait no, wait hold on. What about the door? The door that Hilbert was supposed to open once he killed all of them? The grey door, the one he kept giving ominous monologues about? And...he knew about the empty man, or maybe the transmission were to tell him about the empty man. But what is that? What does that mean? You know what, we can figure that out later, I'm still mad at him.

[nobodysdaydreams]

I have many questions about Pryce and Cutter's backstory, but I mostly want to know more about their insecurities and failures. Also, do they have bones?

(Or my reaction to Episodes 55-58 of Wolf359).

Welcome back dear readers! Should I have reacted to more Wolf359 this weekend? No. I have work to do. But, like Doug Eiffel himself, I cannot just let a cliff hanger like that go unfinished. The events of the last two episodes have been spinning in my head for the last 24 hours and I need ANSWERS DANG IT. Will this lead me to an even bigger cliffhanger that I will surely regret later? Probably, but that's the risk we need to take. As Doug Eiffel said "a leap of faith".

Tagging the mutuals who got me invested in this, and if you want to be tagged or untagged from these posts, lmk, or you can follow my blog or simply follow the tag "#bods wolf359 reactions". Anyone who has followed me for a while knows my updates are inconsistent, so I apologize in advance for that and for any spelling/grammar mistakes in my posts.

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs @herawell @commsroom @lovelyladylavie

Episode 55: A Place For Everything

Okay, before we start this episode, a few thoughts that have been going through my head:

Obviously Minkowski is brainwashed sadly :( BUT:

Is Jacobi brainwashed too because Kepler ratted him out, or is Jacobi playing as a double agent?

Did Pryce and Cutter brainwash Kepler too, or is he on their team?

Hera is clearly fighting Pryce to warn Doug, but how much is she able to fight past her?

Can Pryce and Cutter even brainwash Lovelace considering she's an alien clone?

I need to figure out where everyone is. I need to know what happened. Was there a struggle or did Cutter just stroll in and snap his fingers?

Oh we're going back in time. Nice to see Minkowski, Jacobi, and Lovelace working together for as long as it lasts.

Okay so they are looking for Doug, and find Dr. Evil and her psychotic murder business man boyfriend instead.

It's nice that they're doing so much to rescue Doug though. But he really should have talked this through with them. And then they all should get the heck out of there before Cutter shows up.

Kepler. BE QUIET. Has he learned nothing? Does he have a death wish?

Kepler: "There are limits to the human body...I'm not talking about Eiffel. Give them a chance to catch their breath" Wow, such caring words from the man who risked the lives of his crew just to get a bottle of Whiskey back.

"Since when you are worried about pushing people too far." GREAT QUESTION MINKOWSKI.

Oh you "knew" Jacobi was on your side did you Kepler? "Maybe there's other things I've been wrong about." NOW? You're figuring this out now, Kepler? It took you that long? Is he awkwardly trying to grab a redemption arc too? I want to hope so, but something tells me he'll flip the second Pryce and Cutter show up.

"Just be wrong quietly" I love Minkowski

A shuttle? Shoot it. SHOOT IT.

Oh great Cutter has a message.

Wow, he even made a fake "We're not your enemy" message.

HERA CAN'T STOP THEM FROM DOCKING. NO NO NO NO NO.

And what are they doing to Lovelace.

Does Kepler know it's them? Oh yeah. He and Hera know. Everyone knows now. Oh boy...

Yeah. Really really bad is an understatement. I hope you guys have a plan. A really really good plan.

Well here come the bad guys.

"Who's gonna come through those doors? High level SI-5?" Jacobi doesn't even know...oh Kepler you really kept them in the dark didn't you?

Um. What was that. Four people? Who are they?

Another Australian guy?

Oh is that Rachel Young? Ew. Why is she there?

Ah...there he is. Yes, Cutter they did have quite a party. Shame you're here to ruin it. "You look awful" don't insult Kepler, Cutter. That's MY job.

THEY TOOK OVER THE MINDS OF THE HERMES CREW? So that's why they're following them.

"This is just a formality, don't you Daniel? Just until you can be...processed." Okay, so he's gonna brainwash him.

And Cutter has been 100% listening in on EVERYTHING. EVERYTHING. Who are you lying for? Those "reports" are probably just so he knows how much information you're willing to tell him.

And...there she is.

Oh Cutter named the AI? Interesting.

She said "no" Pryce, does she need to say it again?

HERA DON'T TELL HER THAT.

Oh dear. They got Hera too now.

I'm surprised more people aren't freaking out about Pryce and Hera sharing a voice.

"Neither of them is my type" Then...who is Jacobi, also what do you think picking the lock will do?

Yep. Brainwashed Zombies.

"I'm an SI-5 agent in good standing..." Jacobi, that doesn't matter anymore.

"There isn't someone worse that still hasn't showed up" Oh...but you haven't considered the dear listeners.

Okay so we got Cutter, Rachel, Pryce, a black ops agent, some brainwashed zombies they picked up from Hermes, and...wait what's wrong with Pryce's eyes? Is she a cyborg?

Huh. Pryce would need to be 50 at least to have written the space manual. And Cutter would too, but did so under a different name. Oh this is a development. I assumed they were like in their 50s/60s being played by 20 something years old actors...but I guess they actually do look that young...

...

...I guess they have a great skin care routine? Diet? Biotech? Are they both cyborgs? Do they replace parts of themselves whenever they break down? And if so...just how old are they?

Oh Doug is back! Poor Hera. You can save him, Hera. I know you can.

"Hi Doug :)" Don't like that.

"The Sol" of course Cutter would name it after the sun. He sees himself at the center of the universe.

"Renee is fine. Healthy as a horse" shut it Cutter!

"Hera? Is that you?" I love that Doug is the one that picked up on that and Pryce, being mistaken for Hera is the biggest compliment you could ever hope to get.

Counterpart?

"Why do you have Hera's voice?" Because Miranda is evil and likes to play god. Oh my gosh, they literally do think of themselves as gods. Not them quoting scripture too, I swear with each and every episode Cutter and Pryce make me want to vomit. You're not gods. You're just every other selfish terrible lazy parent who has a kid and thinks that they have a right to control the course of their life. Just because you make or create someone doesn't give you the right to do whatever you want with them!

"What?" MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY DOUG.

"1,001 pains in my ass Pryce?" TELL HER DOUG! It's the least of her crimes, but we have to start somewhere.

The...the next you? What um...what happened to the real Carter?

Don't call Doug "good boy" ONLY HERA GETS TO DO THAT.

"You have not been doing a good job as communications officer." HE JUST CONTACTED THE ALIENS. He's the best communications officer you could ever hope to have. Sure, up until now he's done a terrible job, and openly neglected his duties, but this is what happens when you send random ex-convicts with known substance abuse issues and obviously ADHD up into space instead of, oh I don't know, rehabilitating them???

"4 months ago, you took a while to get up here." Exactly what I've been saying.

So they got to Hermes two months ago, but...oh the aliens kept them away! And now Bob let them in, oh no. See Doug, this is why you should have talked to the crew first.

"Go screw yourself" Tell them Doug. They deserve to hear it.

Oh Miranda's torture chair. Of course they have one of those.

"Too bad" it's so unsettling how much Miranda sounds like Hera.

Hopefully, Bob managed to give Doug's mind a little resistance.

It seems that Rachel and Kepler don't get along so well. Bit of a rivalry there?

"Deliver or you're off the team" I don't like that motto.

Oh hi Australian guy. I'm sure my mutuals will be more than happy to tell me more about who he is. But since he's evil and not that interesting, I don't really care.

"He makes you disappear, Warren" Rachel seemed way too happy about that. I always thought she and Warren were on the same level, but I think someone just got promoted and someone else might be getting demoted.

"It will take some time to uncouple it from all the Star Wars trivia" good work Doug, keep the hyper fixation noise in your brain.

"Do you ever get a little tired of hearing yourself speak?" Doug is asking the best questions!

"Defiant until the end. You gotta respect that." "No, you don't." It's interesting how much Pryce and Cutter seem to differ in that Pryce stays very guarded and cold while Cutter embraces a very fake pleasant exterior.

"I am never following your orders ever again." Doug...I love you calling them out, but please do not tempt fate. The more you push, they more they push back. They clearly have a thing for breaking people (and machines).

"That wasn't an offer. There's not an element of choice here." Yeah...saw that coming. Sorry Doug. :(

Hopefully Hera can save him and Minkowski.

Oh Jacobi's been dragged off. So did they get him too?

Ew Rachel's here too. Oh and they have a way to hurt Lovelace. But can they kill her if she's an alien?

"Critical system failure" you go Lovelace!

"I owe you a coke." So apparently Pryce and Cutter don't stay young by avoiding sugar.

New friends? Oh no, he's going to show Lovelace what he did to her friends.

UPGRADE TO THE FULL VERSION? Like Hermes? Deleting certain thoughts? Oh my gosh. Like it's irreversible? Do they want to make the whole world like that?

And also if they had that the entire time, why have they not used that on everyone at Goddard from the beginning? They wouldn't have so many problems if they did that from the beginning. But I suppose that if they can't do the full version right away, the tech is probably pretty complex and expensive.

Okay so Raymond is the name of Australian guy. (Got it from the credits).

Well. At least they didn't get Lovelace's mind. We have that to be thankful for.

Episode 56: Idle Hands

Once again, another episode with no opening credits they just take you right in don't they?

So...is Jacobi not brainwashed? He seems agreeable, but not as robotic as Minkowski.

"Don't push them too hard." "Well it's not like they feel it" "I only turned off their pain receptors. They still have bones, primitive things." Miranda, DO YOU NOT HAVE BONES? WHAT ARE YOU?

Great, now I have the bananas have no bones song stuck in my head.

"It's not like any of them are gonna be alive much longer" And perhaps neither will any of you.

AND STOP WITH THE UNIT 214 STUFF.

"No need to speak. Just give me the sum." Interesting. Miranda really hates the sound of Hera's voice.

"What are you trying to accomplish with these attempts at resistance?" You designed her Miranda. You built and created her. She has your voice. You gave her a personality, presumably similar to yourself. You declared yourself her god. So here's an idea. Why don't you figure it out for yourself?

"My name is HERA...screw you" I'm glad Hera told her off, but the way that Pryce and Cutter scold Eiffel and Hera like they're disappointing children...you really do feel the age gap now.

MINKOWSKI CALLS HER UNIT 214 NOW???

"Things are going to be okay." Did they get Jacobi too? Oh they did.

"Just because they can't talk back doesn't mean they-" good point Hera. We understood what you meant.

Also: "I'll find a way to discipline her later." ... Well, well, well. Looks like someone slipped up there for a moment, didn't you Miranda? What happened to "not her. It?" All of a sudden Hera is a her now? And you talk about her like a disappointing child. But since you clearly just view her as an object, I have to wonder, is it hard losing an argument to someone who sounds like you? Someone who expresses a part of yourself that you perhaps, are a little insecure about? See, Miranda, that's the problem with the whole "playing god" thing. You can act all proud of yourself for making something in your own image, but if you don't like yourself, you might not like the image that looks back at you. Happens to real parents with children all the time. Happens to every human who spends too much time together and starts picking up each other's habits. I am going to enjoy writing some fic about you, Miranda /ominous.

"I'll get creative" I'm sure you will, Miranda. And so will I.

"She was always very persistent" "Watch yourself Warren. You don't want to sound like you admire it" well, it looks like RACHEL knows to refer to Hera as an it, and Kepler doesn't, so it seems Miranda really did slip up there. It's not a writer's mistake if they're being so intentional a few minutes later. Oh, this is going to be so fun for me.

"Pryce gets everyone sooner or later" And Hera was made in her image, Rachel. You might want to think about that.

"Pryce doesn't delete AI, she just corrects them" Oh, the AI that sound exactly like her? The ones that sound just like her? She finds their flaws and corrects them, does she? Not at all reflecting her own self-esteem issues I'm sure.

Replaced cranial architecture? Just because Miranda was bored? Wow, she and Cutter really are the worst.

Rachel is also the worst. Oh and Warren calls her "Miss. Young" while she calls him Warren...I guess they're not on the same level at Goddard or if they were...that's for sure over now and Kepler knows it too.

"I'm not worried about her." It's okay to worry about things other than Whiskey, Kepler. A little character complexity before you die won't be a horrible thing.

"Something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy." And it sounds like Rachel would wish a lot on her enemies. So...what is happening with Lovelace?

Cutter's playing Funzo with her? I assume it's Funzo, but they seem to be playing something. Oh Backgammon. 😂

So this is what Rachel was referring to. Oh the parallels between Cutter and Pryce and Doug and Hera just write themselves at this point.

Lovelace: "I don't eat with creeps" Cutter: 🥺 ...me?

Yes you, you evil creepy murder man.

"I mind every second that you exist." Same Lovelace.

Cutter is smoking? "We all have our vices" That is the LEAST of your vices Cutter. Also between the sodas and cigarettes, clearly Pryce and Cutter haven't been staying alive and looking young due to healthy habits.

"You seem tense" very observant Cutter.

What is it with this man and chai lattes? I've seen a few untagged posts about it, I thought people were exaggerating.

"Miranda and I don't agree on everything" "Tell me you're not about to make me do marriage counseling for you and your work wife" CALL HIM OUT ON IT LOVELACE. 😂 "Even for you that's too evil."

"Miranda is...wonderful. But she can be a little cold." Ah. I see. So you and work wifey disagree on how best to torture people. Luring them into a false sense of security vs. being unfeeling and dark from the start. I suppose that's why they work together, to strike that unhealthy balance.

"I don't wanna do that. It's messy. And that's not how I want to do that. We can be better." So they're doing the good cop, bad cop routine?

And something tells me Lovelace doesn't want a pony. I think she wants you dead.

"Compromise is the cornerstone of a good work marriage" so he doesn't deny it then.

Cutter really is an old man. The smoking, the board games, it's only a matter of time before he starts playing bingo, watching wheel of fortune, and talking about how it was "back when he was young whippersnapper".

I swear, if Cutter and Pryce try to drop their tragic backstories...

Who is asking for Unit 214? Oh Doug. This is so sad. "Thank you 214 :)" "Yeah whatever" "Is everything okay?" EVEN BRAINWASHED HE STILL CARES ABOUT HER. "Pryce is nice" No, she's not Doug!

What happened? HE CALLED HER HERA! DOUG IS BACK! DOUG IS BACK! Doug, you have to pretend, but this is good. He's back. Our boy is back. 💕 Did talking to Hera bring him back?

YES HE IS BACK BABY. TAKE THAT CUTTER, YOU NASTY OLD FART!

"I was alone" Oh...oh. Hera's I am alone monologue. :( 💔

Doug talk like a robot! You need it to be believable. Oh Doug, don't become an actor. Thankfully Australian guy (Raymond, whatever) doesn't seem to be the most perceptive.

"It could have been worse. It could have been Dr. Pryce" Yep. Way worse.

What is Pryce doing that has RACHEL of all people so rattled? I don't like those sounds.

Oh her eye? And I guess that looks pretty gross. And still needs routine adjustment too. Well, well, I think we found some more insecurity. My "ripping apart the villains" sniffer is sniffing out some good stuff here.

Oh yippie. Jacobi's here to help.

Performance review? Review of who? Kepler? Style is Marcus's department, that is very true. HOW BADLY DO YOU NEED JACOBI? oh Kepler is gonna be tested isn't he? Are they gonna make him torture and shoot a compliant Jacobi?

"Boring again..." you're one to talk Cutter. It's always the same with you people.

DOUG, HE CAN TOTALLY TELL. Oh good Cutter is preoccupied and leaving them alone. Just say "yes sir" in a monotoned voice Doug!

Phew. I guess Cutter isn't used to doubting his work wife.

"Wanna know a secret?" 😂😂😂

What's funny is that Cutter could totally make Doug do that to trick her. Oh it looks like Lovelace thought of that.

Doug be incompetent and make references. Not even Pryce and Cutter can fake that. See? She believed that!

Headache? What does that mean? Lovelace's blood? Oh.

So what I'm hearing is that we need to do a few blood transfusions.

"Dr. Pryce can see and hear everything" then you might need to leave Hera.

"I'm here to help! 🥰" Jacobi seems cheery.

Examination table? What are Pryce and Cutter doing to him?

"How old was Dr. Maxwell?" 28. That's...that's young, oh no. That's so sad. Cutter knows it's Kepler's fault too. He's never gonna be done getting tortured with this.

Oh right. His arm is gone, I keep forgetting. They're giving him a prosthetic arm? Well they could have been far less ominous about that. "Prove you belong here." Um...how? He's giving him reading homework? Well that was less ominous than I thought. Wayyyy less ominous.

Hearing Jacobi like this is so funny, I'm sorry. Hopefully, Doug got him the blood and hopefully Jacobi keeps his mouth shut.

Oh. Jacobi didn't make it. Doug you can't risk losing the ground you have. You don't have 10 minutes!

Oh no. It's not Jacobi is it?

Ah. Kepler /derogatory.

I don't know about that Kepler, but I think you might be drowning in Whiskey.

Episode 57: The Devil's Plaything

Nice of them to take us directly back to Kepler's "well, well, well".

"I'm done here" That's the most you've sounded like a robot all day Doug!

See?

Oh and Jacobi is back!

I see Jacobi doesn't know about Kepler's new prosthetic upgrades.

"Putting an end to this. Blowing up the Hephaestus." I hate to say it, but that might be the only solution now.

Doug. Look. I know. I would never pick this solution. But think about your daughter.

Oh, Jacobi has plans to get them off. But um... WHAT ABOUT HERA? She IS the Hephaestus. Can you um...make her the sol? Oh, the sol can hold her consciousness? Well that's good, but Maxwell would be really useful right now. If only Kepler had been the one to go.

That is a good question Doug. Why didn't you get Minkowski first?

Oh gross. Doug. Doug. Do not talk to her. Don't talk to Rachel Young. Don't talk to Dr. Pryce.

"Are you there?" It might not be safe to speak. But Hera is always there, she said so herself.

Visual and thermal sensors? Good plan, but won't Pryce notice?

"As long as it's not Jacobi" *flashes to Jacobi*

"How are things?" Not the best time for small talk Jacobi.

Jacobi knew one of them? This is so sad. He's...yeah they're gone. No one comes back from what Pryce did. 💔 "What they did to them is what you wanted Maxwell to do to me" That was rough, but fair. Jacobi needed to hear that. I like his redemption arc. I'm glad to see it's finally going somewhere.

Rachel really hates Doug 😂

Doug please don't talk to yourself. And remember, you technically can't feel pain. Pretend it's an inconvenience. Why does Rachel sound like a schoolteacher yelling at a first grader while Doug moans and whimpers? 😂

"Oh hello Eiffel. You're bleeding." Indeed, Minkowski.

"Everything is going to be fine." Why do I feel like that might be a phrase Cutter and Pryce use to hypnotize them or something, they say it constantly.

"You just stuck a needle in my neck. That wasn't very nice of you" 😂 Please this is too funny.

"Everything is going to be okay." SEE? SHE LET HIM GO!

Oh no. He called her Hera. Pryce won't allow that.

"Why are you calling her that?" I knew it! Just come up with something... um...Cutter asked me to call her that for his amusement?

oh and even "it's all okay" won't save him now.

How did Minkowski get the walkie-talkie? Oh dear. She's been under the longest too. And she's a trained solider. Doug you should have shot the comms system faster!

"Commander?" "Not quite." "I'm putting the lieutenant on manual." PRYCE CAN JUST SPEAK THROUGH THEM?

DOUG DON'T TELL HER! DON'T TELL HER!

"Don't delude yourself boy" It's little things like calling Doug "boy" that make me realize how old Pryce and Cutter really are. At first I thought they were boomers, but are they from the early 1900s because they seem even older than boomers sometimes just by the way they talk.

Oh dear what's happening now.

"Eiffel is sacrificing himself, what a hero" 😂 Jacobi, never change. Well, do change, but not your sense of humor. That can stay.

The airlock? She's making Minkowski leave out the airlock?

Oh Pryce is onto Jacobi too! "Go to hell" "not before the lieutenant does" Just because you're doing there doesn't mean everyone is Pryce.

Hopefully the alien blood protects them?

Gross. Rachel and Hermes zombies. The worst.

Minkowski! Come back! You can do it!

The Hermes crew went down! They did it! And yes! Punch Young in the face!

No. Not Minkowski. No. She needs to see her husband again!

SHE'S BACK! NOW RUN! RUN FAR AND FAST!

"Have they hit you with a wrench before?" well, no, but they did try it. That's what happens when you lose Jacobi, Rachel. You get hit with wrenches.

Oh poor Hera. It's not your fault.

Alive or dead? Alive, if you can manage. Well at least that's good...I think...

"Only a set back" well let's hope not Cutter. Not interested in your idea of fun.

Episode 58: Quiet, Please

Is this episode about Kepler or Cutter? Because I need them both to be quiet.

Oh right, the plant monster. Good thing Minkowski set up all those weapon stations! Now let's go hunt the real monsters.

The new plan can't be the old plan. Hera told them everything. They know. It's not her fault Jacobi!

Hera, you have to realize that you can't hear this. You have to trust that they will get you off the ship. "Show that WOMAN some respect" YES MINKOWSKI. Very true. But also, you need to make sure they have no way to hear about your plans.

Cutter is also probably waiting on the sol for them in a big evil chair. He's likely practicing his evil speech right now.

This would be a great time for the plant monster to come back and kill Cutter. I wish they keep him around. 💔🪴

"As long as I don't have to be out there" *cuts to Doug out there*

"The only time you're getting visuals from one place" "It's weird I don't like it" Interesting. It probably does feel weird to Hera.

And there goes Doug. I just imagine Kepler telling Pryce "don't worry. I've been tracking them and I'm positive they're in storage, right behind this door" only for Doug to go screaming and flying past the window as Pryce stares at Kepler with a deadpan look.

Talking uses air. Good point. Perhaps they should all talk less. The good news is we haven't heard from Whiskey boy the entire episode. Perhaps he's giving Pryce and Rachel the Whiskey monologue as they go through the ship.

"You're other left" once again Doug is me.

As we listen to Doug go on this journey, I once again return to Kepler's prosthetic arm. I wonder if they can hack it.

Wait what's happening now? Oh the security system is active? Oh dear.

I'm just waiting for things to go wrong. There's no way Cutter Pryce and the gang aren't onto them.

Biometric or retinal... do they need Pryce's eyes? Oh she has spare eyes. I wonder what happens if they break. And how she lost her original eyes. 👁️

"Everyone in favor of going to the lab say "eye"" Lol, "the eyes have it" I love it.

I just know they're gonna show up. I know it. I'm just waiting for it.

There's no way Miranda would leave her lab this unsecured.

Oh...she has a lot of eyes does she? THEY MOVE? Ew. Well... I guess Pryce needs a lot of backups. If I were them I'd just grab one. What's so gross and unsettling about it? I mean, I get that they're eyes that move, but...they make it sound so horrifying. I guess this really must be Miranda's insecurity.

Did he drop the eye? Oh no. This just keeps getting worse. And why wouldn't you grab a backup and smash the rest? If Miranda needs backups, it must be for a reason! Make sure she can't see. It's like smashing someone's glasses or destroying their contact lenses. Get whatever upper hand you can!

Oh. Hi Raymond. Didn't expect you to be here. Um...what now?

An inspiring speech from Doug. Yes, give Hera a moment. I believe in her. 💕

Oh never mind it's Kepler. Gross.

Oh right, Pryce can see in the dark because of her eyes.

"I don't kill people. It's wasteful. I value all my workers highly" I hate Pryce. She's clearly mad about how they broke out of her restraints.

Recycle it! Good work Doug. Recycling and reusing is good the planet. Of course, we're in space, but...oh fire code. ♻️

Oh so Eiffel, Minkowski, Pryce, and Kepler are ejected in space?

Well. Um... that's an awkward group. Perhaps they can play a little Funzo?

Okay, now I REALLY can't listen to anymore. I've wasted way too much time procrastinating. But we're coming to the end now, which is exciting. See you (hopefully) soon everyone!

[nobodysdaydreams]

Y'ALL I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE TO BEGIN. WTF? WTF?

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

(Or my reaction to Episodes 53-54 of Wolf359).

Welcome back dear readers! Thank you for enjoying my reaction to the Mission Mishap and mini episodes, which were shorter and a lot easier to fit into my busy schedule. I try to make sure I have time to type out good live quality reactions for you guys, so thanks for your patience on this.

Tagging the mutuals who got me invested in this, and if you want to be tagged or untagged from these posts, lmk, or you can follow my blog or simply follow the tag "#bods wolf359 reactions". Anyone who has followed me for a while knows my updates are inconsistent, so I apologize in advance for that and for any spelling/grammar mistakes in my posts.

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs @herawell @commsroom @lovelyladylavie

Episode 53: Dirty Work

This episode has gotten a lot of hype from the mutuals. I hope that means Pryce and Cutter are actually gonna bother to show up this time. The two of them did their whole ominous “we’re going to space” thing at the very beginning of this season, well hurry up and go to space then since you care so much! Instead they gave us enough time for Doug to have his radio show arc, which (while it was necessary, and I enjoyed it), just goes to show how much time Pryce and Cutter actually put into this. Which should be evident given that it has taken them at least this long to get to space despite it being their “life’s work” (and for some “higher purpose” they’ll probably monologue about too no doubt 🙄. Hopefully they keep their speech shorter or at least more interesting than Whiskey Boy). Laziest villains of all time sending other people to space the dirty work. Which happens to be the episode title, look at that.

And if I had to guess who is going to be doing Pryce and Cutter’s dirty work, my money’s on Whiskey Boy. Well, actually, my money’s on free-will deprived Hera, but I hope I’m wrong.

Well this is rare. No preview ads to skip through. Huh.

Oh, Minkowski 🥺. We know you didn't want to kill anyone. Don't worry, I will give you justice in fanfic if the show doesn't give it to you here.

HILBERT. Shut up. Even in death, you still don't get it do you? Minkowski has a right to be upset. Even if anyone on this ship makes it back to earth, they are still gonna be extremely traumatized.

Doug, what are you up to now?

And no, Lovelace. Minkowski is not okay. None of you are okay.

"23rd time is the charm!" That's the spirit, Doug! 🥰

Oh right, the reset that Hera has been putting off.

Lol, Hera's "Good Boy". There you go Doug. You see, he can be taught.

"Get him to do what he's told!" Well that would likely be Hera's department.

Not the bottles of beer song. I swear, why are Kepler and Jacobi even still here? What are they contributing? 🍻 "Don't do anything stupid?" a bit late for that.

Um...what is this? Who was that? Wait is that Maxwell's ghost talking to Jacobi?

Do not be a bad guy again Duck Boy. 🦆 That is how your friend got killed, remember? Do you want to be a dead duck?

Well at least we got some music. Nice work, Doug! 🎶

VERIFICATION CODE WHISKEY. a;lsjkfklsdjfk I KNOW Kepler came up with that one. I don't care that it's a legit code, I know it is, but he probably puts Whiskey in every single secret code of his.

Doug. GET BACK INSIDE.

Not demolitions. Jacobi. You fool. You impulsive explosive dumb-dumb. Do not blow up the ship you're on.

"Now I may not be as smart as my late colleague" understatement of the century Jacobi.

Oh great. He's willing to kill them all. Fantastic. Oh and Kepler's coming too. OH. Because Minkowski killed Maxwell and Kepler let her die and had no remorse. Jacobi wants revenge. Oh. Oh no...

"How's your day going?" been better.

Kepler's speech...so was he working with Jacobi this whole time? Convincing plan if he was, but I gotta say Kepler, I don't know if that's gonna work as smoothly for you this time around. Jacobi seemed pretty upset, and there would be no reason for him to reveal that now when he has the upper hand.

SHOOT HIM!

AS:Jlkfjsdlkfjlkds I KNEW IT!!!!!!!

"Pretty please with sugar on top" oh we're going there.

And after hearing about how Kepler bought him explosives...this whole betrayal thing really did go to the next level with them.

"Is this an elaborate prank to teach me a very important lesson?" askjdfkld;jf I love you Doug. 😂 And that would be hilarious.

Poor Doug...that's it Doug! Go into the star! That's what they want! Why do they want this? Who knows. It is weird though. They presumably know that humans die if they do that, and if they wanted them dead there's a million more efficient ways to kill them.

"Blow Kepler's brain's out" "Jacobi...where are you going with this?" Wow, Whiskey Boy really IS slow, isn't he? Maybe it wouldn't have killed him to shed a few fake tears at Maxwell's funeral.

"He was the one who put her in the line of fire, and you should be the one who has to do it."

That does make sense. Because Kepler won't care about shooting Minkowski or anyone else, and while Minkowski certainly wouldn't enjoy dying, she's still tortured with guilt over the fact that she killed Maxwell. But force Minkowski to relive that trauma, intentionally and painfully, and taking everything from Kepler...oh man Duck Boy really did think this through.

"You complete and utter idiot..." YES PUNCH HIM JACOBI! Unconventional grieving process is an understatement.

"I don't want to kill anyone" "Else" ouch.

And yeah... this is Jacobi's "2 birds one bullet solution"

Jacobi is unhinged.

"This is it. Either she shoots you or I kill everyone" yeah it really is over.

Jacobi. You don't need to do this. You really don't.

PHONE CALL?

No. Do not call Pryce and Cutter. Do not call them Jacobi, I don't care if you want to tell them off do not give them information do not call them. Do not call anyone. Maxwell is dead, who does he even have to talk to? Is he gonna call his family? Maxwell's family?

Kepler begging Minkowski for a backup plan...Jacobi really DID beat him...he's nothing now. Though to be fair, he didn't have much to begin with.

"There's no bomb?" Then...what is...oh no. Jacobi what is this game?

"I'm not crazy, that stuff's dangerous!" 😂 Why is Jacobi evil Doug sometimes? I swear if it wasn't for the circumstances they would be friends.

"You've been through plenty, just sit tight. It will all be over soon." I don't know if that's meant to reassure Lovelace or sound ominous Jacobi, but if it was the former, you really gotta work on not sounding like the bad guy.

"Blue, being sucked in, process, killed the original captain Lovelace...the door." There you go Doug! I knew he could figure it out! His science fiction knowledge really comes in handy.

That is a big risk, especially since you don't know what these aliens want, or their history with slimy business man and his evil science girlfriend!

Yep. Leap of faith. Scary stuff, especially when your trust has been broken before.

"Why couldn't it be snakes" Doug, be careful what you wish for.

"How could he? After everything we've been through?" Kepler, be serious. You stalked him, brought him expensive Whiskey and sweet talked a desperate and broken man into joining your murder organization, showed him creepy levels of favoritism at various points in time (especially coming from you of all people), and had zero remorse when you let his best friend get killed. That's what you've been through.

"Will he blow us up" "Yeah." "Can you override his override?" "No. He and Maxwell handled that. I trusted them." Yes, Kepler. And they trusted you. Now one of them is dead. Let's think about this for a moment. I'm sure if we all put our heads together, we can get to the bottom of this mystery of why Jacobi has betrayed you for apparently no reason.

Is Kepler's back up plan shooting Jacobi? OH MY GOSH IT IS...AND YOU WONDER WHY HE BETRAYED YOU? Kepler, you moron, he's probably listening to this entire conversation. He might be deciding which side he wants to back at this very moment. Now is the time to act really really sad about Maxwell and very very broken up about how you treated Jacobi. Not openly admit that you threw Maxwell's life away to get what you wanted, and that you'd throw Jacobi's life away to save your own skin. Otherwise, Jacobi might just end up shooting YOU when he walks through that door.

"Who is putting your station in danger?" You Kepler. You are doing this.

"For once in your life, shut up" About time someone said that Kepler.

"You're hurt, we all are. But you don't have to kill anyone." Oh Minkowski, I know you're trying but Duck Boy is not in a rational space right now. He's literally trolley probleming you right now.

Okay now Minkowski is going insane. Minkowski stop. JACOBI STOP.

If Kepler was a better man he would shoot himself to end this instead of muttering "this is crazy" at the drama that he is directly responsible for. He really does not know when to keep his mouth shut, does he?

"It's not too late to change your mind." YES MINKOWSKI. TEACH THEM GOOD MORALS. It's never too late. Thank you, finally, someone gets it.

"After everything he's done, after everything you've done?" Yes, and after everything you've done too, Jacobi.

Tell him Minkowski. "I know who you're angry at. It's you. Because you could have backed down but you didn't. We both did. We killed two people. And that's eating you up inside."

I love this so much.

"We kill them. Whatever orders, whatever they did, we did it. That's what the riddle teaches you. However you make the choice, you still make the choice. The blood is still on your hands." "You know what doesn't help? MORE BLOOD"

The cycle ends here! YES MINKOWSKI!

"What will?" Jacobi is listening! Come on Duck Boy. You're waddling your way there. You can do it!

"Twenty bucks says I figure it out first" is this really happening???? Is this really happening???? Please tell me Duck Boy doesn't relapse. I need someone to come to reason.

She never had a bullet. You never had a bomb.

YES, Shut Kepler up! FINALLY the team up we deserve.

I'm glad Lovelace and Minkowski are checking in on each other. And you two both deserve command. You need each other. You all need each other.

Oh Hera. She missed the whole thing. 😂

"What did I miss?" Well, Jacobi is a sort of good guy now (or at least an ally), Kepler still sucks, and everyone forgot about Doug.

Wait. DOUG WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

NO DOUG. NO DOUG NO. AT LEAST GO BACK TO THE SHIP AND TALK IT OUT WITH THEM FIRST.

Well that WAS a wild ride. Maybe one of my favorite episodes so far. I can see why y'all were hyping it up.

Episode 54: The Watchtower

Huh. No more pre-episode previews again. And who is this?

Oh Doug. Oh dear. Doug, you poor thing, I'm glad you had a breakthrough but you probably should have talked this through with everyone first.

Doug. Oh Doug. You're the main character and there are a lot of episodes left. You can't just casually throw yourself into the star midway through the season and die like that.

Something is coming out of the star? Reaching out towards, Doug? Oh boy. Well...

...yikes. What is he saying?

Hera is probably listening to this like "oh Doug...Doug what did you do?"

I love how Doug is still talking to Hera. 💕 "Any objections? Good girl." Well that certainly parallels the last chapter...

Wait. Two more stars? Triple star system? That's pretty cool.

Um. What is that? Aliens? ...hopefully nice aliens?

...or not. Oh dear.

...and um. Where is Doug now? Woke up? Woke up from WHAT?

Did the aliens put Doug back in the ship?

Or...is this now clone Doug? I hope not.

Well at least there's breathable air and gravity in this alien hotel.

Mirror? Yeah that is a creepy touch. Considerate, yet creepy.

Self-repairing mirror? Again, cool but creepy. And Doug is prefect for this. They got the movie from YOU MIND Doug. They built this creepy hotel for you, I'm guessing.

And when the alien shows up, I bet it's gonna be one that looks like you or your loved ones given that they used your voice already.

What was that noise?

Are they just keeping him there?

"Let's get our probe on" Doug...they are. What do you think this is?

Yep...alien Doug. Hi alien Doug. :) 👋👽

"Tell me this isn't where I die and you take my place. My dad always said I'd die if I wasn't more careful..." it's alright Doug, I've been told that myself plenty of times.

What?

Words. Speak more words.

Why do they need Doug to speak words?

Ah yes. Mirroring and learning. That's what they want. But why? Why Doug?

Crippled by a language limited by what? Yet achieving interstellar momentum? Uh...what? Symbiological base set of language?

Doug singing the alphabet 😂

DIE????

What is die? The concept is unknown? Oh...oh dear. Explain that it's a bad thing Doug. Explain that it's a very bad scary thing.

"I hate it when Kepler and Jacobi are right" Don't we all Doug, don't we all?

Stops existing!

Incomplete understanding of the universe.

Yes, yes, to dust you shall return, no matter is created or destroyed it simply changes form, but you seem very unnaturally calm about this.

All matter is reused and repurposed. Ceasing from existence is not possible. ...well that's true...but...YOU are something else now. YOU are gone. Something else is in your place now.

Bob. Bob. "Limited time?" "Unsuitable for his biology?" So you DO know what death is. Because you understand that a place unsuitable for his biology = no Doug.

Wait. In the NETWORK? WE? Bob. Are you a hive mind?

"You learned to speak English?" "Correct. It has also lead to debate over whether YOU can speak English." Dang, they really came for him there.

The process? Why are you evaluating Doug?

"Terms you can understand may take some time" Well for super intelligent beings, you should be smart enough to dumb it down.

Don't like that laugh. "A place very very far away from here." Interesting.

"The farthest point away from civilized space"

I see. And what exactly does civilized space look like?

"Discomfort should pass quickly" time is relative, so I hope you're right, Bob.

He gave Doug knowledge? Well, that might be a good way to one up Cutter.

Okay transfer between stars...I'm guessing no, because they didn't use the sun. Huh. I was correct.

Red = no, Blue = go. Well, Bob, sometimes the basics are all you need.

Another species. Rearrange matter? I see. So they are basically aliens with god-like powers that join together to form a superpower.

And they're recruiting humans...but they seem unimpressed so far. Why would they...oh.

They want the music don't they? They've never...they don't have music, but they like it for some reason.

Well then just send them up a band, seems like an easy solution.

Examination, evaluation...surrogates of specimens?

"Unnecessarily dramatic description" "The wolf doesn't even know it's a wolf!" "We arranged atoms" "You brought her back from the dead" "The distinction is irrelevant" Doug, please explain it to them. They really did do Lovelace dirty.

OH MY GOSH THIS IS EXACTLY LIKE WHAT CUTTER DOES TO PEOPLE. Spy on them, and if he likes them, they get to join his special secret club. And if they don't like you...I think we both know what happens Doug. They DO have a concept of death. They just prefer not to call it that.

"Ideally isolation" Well at least they are semi-ethical.

"If they can't be isolated" "redistribution into different atoms" SEE I KNEW IT. They call it redistribution because they can't accept the moral idea of killing people.

"They are given a new purpose." Bob...Bob this is immoral. This is horrifying.

"Terminology is inadequate" his terminology is spot on Bob.

"Our interest in your species is not moral. It is technological" Yeah Bob, I think you made that VERY clear when you said you were willing to kill everyone on Earth if they didn't play nice.

You don't deserve our music Bob. Not one note. Which is...a sentence I never thought I would type as a reaction to this show, but here we are I guess.

They can turn back time, escape death, and traverse space, but they don't have music Doug! Most of their language isn't auditory. They have it, apparently, but not to the extent where they'd develop it.

Commander Zhung...valued the tech more than anything.

Oh. I'd like to have met Commander Zhung (I hope I'm spelling that right). She sounds...she sounds nice if that was her reaction to hearing music for the first time.

"You haven't figured out sound recording?" No, Doug. "The music?" There you go, Doug.

And um...I think the aliens might be more into the oldies and by oldies I mean the classics Doug. The old school classics. Stick to classical music. Not sure they're ready for rock and roll or rap or pop or country.

In time they'll learn more about each other, slowly. Okay...so they have some time. That's good. 14,000 YEARS? Oh no wonder they don't fear death. They live a ridiculously long time. And yeah Kepler is in for a treat.

And then...he woke up.

But um...where has he woke up? Near the star? But where is the ship?

"Everything is completely under control"

Why...why does Minkowski sound like a robot? I mean, she usually sounds pretty strict before she snaps at Doug for risking his life, but the actress sounds distinctly creepy here, I don't like it.

Creepy music? Hera struggling and begging him to run?

Oh no. Oh no no no no no...Cutter and Pryce came didn't they? Oh no...Oh no...

Oh Cutter, you bastard.

And I don't have time to listen to anymore tonight. Or this weekend, or for a while, gosh DANG IT, BUT THAT WAS SO GOOD.

Well, I hope you guys enjoy this. I have a lot of emotions so I'm gonna post this with no edits and scream about it in a discord chat somewhere. Bye!

[nobodysdaydreams]

Okay, now they REALLY gotta drop the Jacobi duck-related lore 🦆 (and I need to stop holding out hope Blessie will return 😔💔)

(Or my reaction to Wolf359’s Mission Mishap Episodes).

Welcome back dear readers! My schedule has been busy lately, but the Mission Mishap episodes were mercifully short, so I’ve been listening to a few episodes per week and have gathered my reactions here for you all to enjoy.

Tagging the mutuals who got me invested in this, and if you want to be tagged or untagged from these posts, lmk, or you can follow my blog or simply follow the tag "#bods wolf359 reactions". Anyone who has followed me for a while knows my updates are inconsistent, so I apologize in advance for that and for any spelling/grammar mistakes in my posts.

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs @herawell @commsroom

Also tagging @lovelyladylavie because I promised I’d tag you way back on this post and forgot (I’m so sorry!) but my reactions are all under the tag so you should be able to find them!

Mission Mishaps: A Little Night Music

"Not fully reading your contract before you sign it...not understanding your job responsibilities, and wanting commander off your back" I love Doug's sponsorships and the dramatic irony 😂 *Cue The Fine Print playing in the background...*

I guess the only actor they could get was Doug. Nice of him to fill us in on what Minkowski and Hera are saying though.

OH MY GOSH.

HIS VOICE.

DR. DR. PROFESSOR DR. PROFESSOR F. EIFFEL 😂

It's so fancy. Mannnyyyy PhDs. Very impressive, Doug.

I'm so happy we got more radio show Doug. I need to hear him do a radio show where all his personalities talk to each other. Being the special guest on the show is Cutter's punishment for all eternity. The Dear Listeners make 5 copies of Doug so he can be all the characters.

"The feeling you'll die miserably..." yikes, broke character for a second there Doug.

"Ah yes...the way the piano notes dance around the...other piano notes...absolutely fantastic piece for when you want to start your day with the paino-y energy" Well said Doug.

Oh boy. Cowboy music. Is this the return of Badass McAwesome? Do I dare to hope?

Ah, well, better luck next time.

His poor toe. I hate when that happens too, Doug.

The...mind eraser?

Don't like how that sounds. Especially after the threats in "Change of Mind".

Better not be foreshadowing.

"This song is a mutant, it's superpower is being catchy. It never leaves."

Okay, THAT better not be foreshadowing.

"Afraid of the plant monster?" I wish we could be, Doug. I wish we could be. 😔🪴

"Worried you'll never get back to Earth to see you're family?" Oh, Doug. 💔

"Bosses you're pretty sure are kind of evil" Kind of is generous Doug.

Yeah...yeah Doug that got very dark there for a bit.

Moral boosting? Oh dear. MUTE 😂 AFTER TWO MINUTES 😂

I love Doug. Poor fellow. I enjoyed the broadcast Doug. They don't appreciate your talents.

Mission Mishaps: The Space You’re In

I love the title’s double meaning.

More of Doug dodging his work I see. A common theme.

“Please stop going off on tangents” I guess Cutter and Pryce didn’t send them up with any ADHD meds. “I’m here for work 😊” Nice cover, Doug. 👍🏻 nailed it.

“I’m gonna get that thing that I forgot”. You do that Doug.

How did I know Doug was gonna break something? 🤣

Specimen incubation period??? BLESSIE????

How dare they tease us with Blessie lore?

Good question Doug. Why IS there a harpoon?

Doug literally has no where to hide. 🤣

Oh right. Space. Why do I see that backfiring?

PFFTTT—- Did she just call him a lizard? 🦎

“It’s beautiful” -> “I hate space” poor Doug. I’m sensing a pattern 🤣

Mission Mishaps: You Want, I Solve Ah Doug stealing coffee from Minkowski. Once again, I sense a pattern.

Wait. A puppy? 🥰🐕‍🦺🐾

“The mean lady who runs this place” really Doug? You did just steal her coffee.

2 tails? Well, twice the wagging, I see that as a win. 🥰

Follow him Doug!

IS ZACH VALENTI DOING THE VOICE OF THE DOG?

AS SMEGOL AND GOLLUM FROM LORD OF THE RINGS?

AND IS DOUG HALLUCINATING FROM THE COFFEE???

The dogs are multiplying? David Bowie is here? Okay Doug is hallucinating for sure.

Ah hello Hilbert.

Why is he treating the manual like it’s the ring? 🤣

Well. That was weird.

Oh, Hilbert. All to get Doug to bond with the manual.

And yet something tells me he still won’t read it. It does sound like he might be cuddling with it at night and killing anyone who tries to take it from him though. Mildly concerning. Mission Mishaps: The Veldt Oh my gosh. The episode description. Eiffel goes into the greenhouse… y’all. I don’t wanna get my hopes up, but…

IS THIS BLESSIE CONTENT???? 🪴

I’m so excited guys. I don’t wanna get my hopes up, I know I shouldn’t, but I need Blessie back!

So Doug is doing his chores again. I sense a pattern.

He does a great Australian accent. Again, I need the aliens to clone Doug just so he can have a show where his different personalities talk to each other. Hm. Oxygen chamber has a lot of passwords. And a lot of weird ways to enter passwords. Which is nice for protecting the air, but not so great when you, you know, desperately need air and only have a few seconds to enter the password.

The binary forms of color? This is so extreme not to mention boring. Not one sign of Blessie. I’ve been bamboozled. And WHY is there a timer? This is so weird.

THAT’S IT?

Well I’m upset. We went to the greenhouse and didn’t see leaf or stem of Blessie. 💔

I’m not giving up hope. If not in the show then in fanfic that plant is coming back.

Mission Mishaps: Lights Out

Another entry from dear Doug. I wonder if Minkowski and Hilbert are gonna have him do something he doesn’t want to and then hijinks ensues and Doug messes something up?

HP Lovecraft, Call of Kuthulu? Oh me too Doug stuff is hard to pronounce.

Doug does a good creepy narrator voice. It’s funny to think of Hera listening to all this. It reminds me of those people on Lovelace’s crew reading stories together.

“Property of Dr….”

DOCTOR WHO? (A good show, but I’m literally asking the question).

Is it that girl on Lovelace’s crew who liked to read? (I’m sorry it’s hard to keep track of their names).

Ah yes, and the star is acting up. As is Doug’s imagination. I’m sure this couldn’t possibly go wrong.

Hilbert. What sample? What escaped?

I’m not getting my hopes up this time. You teased me with Blessie once. I’m not falling for it again. I’ve been burned before.

It just sounds like a little mouse. 🐁

…I hope it’s not one of the spiders… I’m now beginning to realize Doug’s fears…

“It’s small and scurrying”

Is it a mouse?

Doug, it’s probably just a mouse. “It’s staring at me.” Well it’s probably scared too, Doug.

Doug, you better not have killed that poor little mouse.

You killed the maintenance drone Doug? Well that was a wild ride. At first I thought they weren’t gonna go the “Doug messes up a thing Hilbert and Minkowski are doing” route but they always surprise me with their ability to bring it back there. Not that I’m complaining, I’m loving these stories. Mission Mishaps: Cold Turkey More Doug! Wow. 553 days. That’s… that’s a lot.

Thanksgiving? Is this the same Thanksgiving from Hera’s memory? 🦃

Banned from the kitchen? Oh poor, Doug. Was Hilbert not available? I guess he’s Russian so he doesn’t celebrate it. But he can probably cook.

Doug is just like me fr. Don’t ask my partner what happened when I tried to make him food. All you need to know was that I tried my best, and it’s the thought that counts.

Doug is gonna burn this Turkey. I know the actress was probably busy and these are “extra” episodes, but Hera please come online and help him.

Oh gross. Cans of spam? Disgusting.

Right, maybe Hilbert can do something. But on the other hand, Hilbert and Eiffel can make each other worse. And what was that about psychoactive properties? What was Hilbert exposed to?

“Can I give indifference? I have plenty of that.” Yes, Hilbert, you made that very clear.

“Oh well if I have to “come on”.” “Really!” “No.” Hilbert is lowkey hilarious 🤣 “I like pecan pie…maybe thanksgiving is not so terrible.” 🥧

I love how Hilbert sounds like he’s plotting something ominous even when he’s just talking about pie. 🤣

But seriously, why was he in Texas? He never answered that.

“The best way to keep him away from the kitchen was to put you in charge” oh poor Doug. She was right though.

Aw, this is sweet. I like how it connects to what we saw in Hera’s memories too.

Mission Mishaps: No Complaints Aw man, SI-5? What happened to Doug?

First they take Blessie from me then they force me to spent time with his killers.

Well gang, I guess it’s time for the adventures of Whiskey Man and Duck Boy.

Wow. Sitting in a car and brooding in the rain. An action packed adventure if I’ve ever heard one.

Oh wait, are they stalking Maxwell? They said she was from a small town.

“Did you stalk me?” Yes, he did Jacobi. Kepler was acting so creepy at that bar, I’m sorry. What even was that?

“I really hate you sometimes sir. ✨You’re the worst✨” oh Duck Boy you have no idea.

THE DUCK THING? OH NO PLEASE TELL US ABOUT THE DUCK THING.

What video. WHAT VIDEO.

Please tell us why Jacobi is brooding and PLEASE tell us about the duck video.

Jacobi taught him questions only? Wow he really does love to dig his own grave.

Kepler is not your friend Jacobi. If you think he is, you… gosh you really need to meet somebody. Anybody.

All this complaining… Jacobi really is the evil version of Doug sometimes…

What was on Jacobi’s mind? What did Rachel think was on his mind? Oh, his one year recruitment.

Nothing good ever comes out of a mysterious duffel bag. Why does he have all those fireworks?

When your evil boss takes you on a fake stake out and gives you some fireworks to blow up because he knows you crave destruction: 💣🎆🥰🎇🧨😍

I like that they play fireworks sounds as they roll the credits. It’s a nice touch. Mission Mishaps: Happy Holidays Already down to the last one. Time flies when you’re having fun. Oh more SI-5. Hopefully a little less Whiskey Boy, a little more Duck related lore.

Oh no such luck. :(

Geez, Kepler really does love flexing every single bit of power that he has, doesn’t he? Just get to the point already! Why couldn’t he have been the one to go instead of Maxwell?

“Oh no! Not a binary fault in the quartical… um… that’s bad!” Duck Boy stop being funny I don’t want to like you.

Not Kepler’s slow claps… I swear this man is infatuated with the idea of being a super villain.

What are they afraid of?

…

A holiday party?

the evil space corporation has a HOLIDAY PARTY?

For what holiday? Cutter and Pryce clearly hate holidays. They’ve ordered people killed on nearly every holiday we’ve seen! … actually maybe that’s their way of making the holidays their own… and it makes me wonder who they want to kill at this party. Jacobi and Maxwell have a right to be concerned about this.

“We don’t ask questions. We trust that we were given orders for a reason.” THAT ONLY WORKS IF YOU ARE WORKING FOR TRUSTWORTHY PEOPLE. And committing or endorsing murder takes you off the trustworthy list.

The idea of Cutter and Pryce celebrating Christmas disgusts me. Like, physically I have a hard time stomaching it. Christmas is about joy, and love, and goodwill toward mankind. Cutter and his crazy science gf have no place involving themselves in that. Not unless they show some serious remorse and do some serious penance and jail time.

SECRET SANTA EXCHANGE?

What kind of horrifying messed up gifts do people get each other? I hope Jacobi gets a pet duck.

… Maxwell’s mom died? “We all know you don’t talk to your mom” “…my mom just died?” “No Jacobi.” STOP BEING FUNNY.

Compare this to the holiday stuff that happens with the Hephaestus… this has such a creepy undertone. Especially when you imagine the events happening at the same time.

Well, that’s all for the Mission Mishaps. Sorry it took me so long guys, but I love and appreciate your patience. Excited to finish the rest of the series and hopefully I’ll have more for you soon!

[nobodysdaydreams]

I STARTED WOLF359 SEASON 2 AND FOUND SOMEONE I HATE MORE THAN HILBERT! (Or: my reaction to episodes 14-20 of WOLF359).

Gonna keep my intro for this one short and just dive right into it.

Tagging the mutuals who got me invested in this, and if you want to be tagged or untagged from these posts, lmk, or you can follow my blog or simply follow the tag "#bods wolf359 reactions". Anyone who has followed me for a while knows my updates are inconsistent, so I apologize in advance for that. And for any spelling/grammar mistakes in my posts.

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs

Episode 14: The Kambaya Approach

Um… keyboard clicks and music?? WHO IS THIS? Goddard Futuristics? Who is David? Who is Saul? Rachel? WHY ARE YOU THREATENING TO THROW RACHEL OFF A BUILDING?

Ah a telephone! Could it be our crew?

Oh so THIS is Cutter. Who seems to be Hilbert’s boss. Don’t like him. Oh no did Hilbert find a way to contact him?

Oh now THERE is the telephone sound I heard at the end of last episode.

Renee? Oh so that’s her name. It’s a nice name. But I would prefer you called her “Commander Mincowski” Cutter. Give her respect, and stop acting so chipper. It’s easy to be that confident when you’re not the one in space.

And what kind of boss makes his employees work on Christmas or the day after?

Oh cool Hilbert’s name is Alexander? Wow, so cool, ✨I don’t care✨.

Cutter really seems to love the supervillain monologue. Yeah Doug, good call don’t tell them about the signal…

OH HE’S TRYING TO TEAR THEM APART. SHUT IT CUTTER. WHATEVER SECRETS MINCOWSKI AND HERA HAVE ARE NOTHING ON YOUR TOMFOOLERY.

Incredible. I did not think it was possible for me to hate someone as much as Hilbert so quickly, but he did it! Less than six minutes into season 2, and by golly Mr. Cutter did it! Round of applause for him ladies and gentlemen, truly despicable, I hope he gets his karma.

A complete waste of space. Horrible loser man.

Why do I not believe they’re actually on hold? Mincowski, please listen to him. But Doug get to the point: HILBERT WAS TRYING TO CONTACT CUTTER. HE LITERALLY SAID THAT.

Just pretend like Hilbert went insane.

YES! Taking my advice, smart play, smart play, act like you know nothing, tell them info they’d already know or could easily deduce anyway.

…Cutter. Stop calling her Renee! And stop being like this! What in the supervillain nonsense?

Oh money, of course it’s about money. And the backhanded compliments. OF COURSE DOUG IS THE BEST MAN FOR THE JOB HE’S THE ONLY OTHER MAN ABOARD.

Cutter man, your laugh… I picture him in a high school uniform kicking his feet in the air on his bed as he giggles to himself like an evil little schoolboy. “Hee hee hee I’m killing people in space 🤩” … shut up Cutter.

Okay. So. I know I wanted Hilbert to die earlier. But um… I think I might want Cutter to die more. Yeah… I’d be careful with what you transmit to Cutter. VERY careful.

Oh he knows. Doug he knows. You’re screwed. You’re… you’re completely done for.

Aw, Renee has a cute laugh. She’s nice. At least she and Doug are getting along.

But… will it be easy to get Hera back online? It’d better be. They better save her.

“No I’m not.” GOOD FOR YOU RENEE! Get something out of Hilbert. And yeah, watch the programming. Make sure if you DO get her back online that Hilbert can’t influence her.

Cutter’s instructions are BS… or wait! Is that Hera? Please be Hera.

Oh it’s the voices! It sounds like the echo in an indoor swimming pool.

“I don’t know who you are. I know you have no reason to believe anything that I’m about to say, and I know there’s nothing I can do to prove to you that this isn’t some kind of trick. But please believe me for your own sake”.

Solid start.

CAPTAIN ISABEL LOVELACE! I KNEW IT! Wait is it Lovelace or loveless??? Guess I’ll find out.

Oh the Hephaestus… but… WAIT. Are they in a time vortex? Are they getting signals from the past? Because Lovelace’s mission is over, her lab is sealed off. 955 days ago, okay, so longer than their mission, and a bigger crew too, 5 people plus Lovelace. And yeah, we got the lying thing down. and… yeah the “never make it back to earth” was also quite clear and VERY unethical. They played Hilbert like a fiddle. For a smart man, he’s far too trusting. Cutter was probably planning to shoot him the second he landed.

Communications and science officer got sick? Uh… sick from what? The astrophysicist just VANISHED? Okay… that doesn’t happen. It’s space! Where exactly could he go?

One thing is clear. These aren’t missions. They’re trials. The crew are lab rats. Though I must say, this is a very poorly designed experiment. What on earth are they even testing?

Oh right, Dr. Selburg. Wait. No. The spiders!

…but why would they be experimenting with that? If my crew was dead, and I found out I was sent to die, and I was in that situation, my first thought would not be “bummer. Oh well. Guess it’s time to make some poison spiders grow 🥰”. I honestly don’t know WHAT I’d do in that situation, but I can promise you, it wouldn’t be that.

And who is “THEY”? Command? And what something else??? THE EMPTY MAN?

Are… are the crews connected across time and space? Are they each other’s empty man? No, that wouldn’t match the messages’ warnings. Would be cool though.

“You’re not the first. We were here. Get out before it’s too late for you too.”

Poor Lovelace. And we never do find out what happens. Also Hilbert talked about a lot of other missions, implying that there were more AND that he was on them and somehow made it out alive.

Was he the astrophysicist that vanished?

Also the empty man messages: “There’s no way out…but there is a way in.” In where? Where are they supposed to go if they can’t get out?

Yikes. I guess that’s it then.

Episode 15: What’s Up Doc?

I like the title. Let’s see how the dear old doctor is doing. Perhaps he’ll be more cooperative when he finds out that his boss ordered his demise. But I doubt it.

Ah. Doug’s logs. Might want to be careful with what you say. Day 583.

Red menace’s damage to our autopilot 😂 Good to see Doug has his sense of humor. I think he’s gonna need it.

51 systems with glitches? You need Hera.

He’s playing chess? Well, looks like Doug and I have procrastination in common.

I’d hate playing any game with Hilbert. Chess or otherwise.

Huh. They don’t even have a record of Isabel Lovelace in the air force. Unless… wait crazy theory time: if time warping is a part of this, maybe Isabel is from a FUTURE crew of the Hephaestus not the past. It’s a possibility.

Also side note, but anytime I share literally any of my theories from this show, I get tons of comments that say things like “grinning like the Cheshire Cat right now”. Which is funny, because I do that when I read comments on my fanfics, and that grin usually means one thing: you found the pieces. You have all the pieces. But you won’t put them together and you won’t realize what they mean until it’s too late. I hope that’s not the case here. And if you’re Sophie please disregard this. And to the other TMBS mutuals, if you’re still reading my stuff, please disregard this.

Mincowski knows about Lovelace! Oh she doesn’t remember hearing the name in the lab. Wait… can they not remember the lab?

Yeah, we might want to isolate Hilbert a bit more. Maybe a few more days.

Oh dear. “Don’t get distracted”. Doug, please tell me you brought some adderall on board.

YOU DID MURDER HERA HILBERT. HOW DARE YOU CALL HER A PROGRAM? AND YOU ATTEMPTED TO MURDER YOUR OTHER CREW MATES FOR A MAN WHO JUST ORDERED YOUR EXECUTION.

APPLIANCE?? He’s calling her an APPLIANCE? Hilbert. You better start coughing up some info.

Haha… her imitation of his accent 😂

Apple! 😋 I love apples. 🍎 Just the thing for my hypoglycemia. Nature’s instant sugar. You might want to consider the offer Hilbert. After going days without food, you should be craving something sugary right about now.

NOW HE’S CALLING DOUG A PET MONKEY? THAT IS IT. EAT THE APPLE IN FRONT OF HIM MINCOWSKI. HE DOESN’T DESERVE IT.

On that note, I just remembered I sliced myself up an apple earlier in the fridge. Bods’ snack time! 🥰

Don’t like how confident Hilbert is about the airlock. … oh Hilbert using it as leverage.

You can still be tortured Hilbert. Slowly and painfully tortured.

“You break me? You have no idea who I am what I have done what I have endured”.

Well, we know you’re a murderous loser and pawn Hilbert. Perhaps you shouldn’t overestimate yourself.

HOW DARE YOU CALL MINCOWSKI A COWARD? HE’S IMPLYING THE WHOLE REASON SHE’D JOIN THE ARMY IS TO KNOW WHAT IT IS LIKE TO KILL BUT DOESN’T HAVE THE GUTS?

Uh Hilbert man wtf is up with your world view?

“No one who matters ends up in a place like this one”

Self-esteem issues doctor?

Also what was THAT? Doug? Empty man? Blessie?

No. Doug do not. Do not. He’s running experiments on you. He’s probably been waiting for this.

He’s annoying him to death. I love it 😂.

The good times? When you tried to kill each other?

Afraid of folks back home? Now that might actually be something. And yeah, they have been lying to you.

The truth about how you ended up here? Oh was I right? Did he do crimes?

Hilbert, I think that she’d respect Doug more than you. I certainly do.

Okay good, he didn’t murder anyone. Nice to know.

Hard drive? Oh right his secret experiments.

And he probably has more backups somewhere. But for the ones we have…

✨It’s Hammer Time ✨

He’s a geneticist? Why just question this now?

Radioactively charged microbes make more soap products… is soap products a code for something.

Renee. RENEE. You are on point, but… Doug is a friend.

Mission on the ship? Wolf359 unique energy signal different from other stars. Properties used for mutations… viruses?

Doug, Hilbert doesn’t strike me as the cancer curing type.

Man made retrovirus? Reverse cellular damage? That’s huge. Theoretically… it could reverse aging… and death.

Decima is “unmanageable”?? “Active environment??” HIS BLOOD STREAM?

That is VERY illegal. You used your colleague as incubator for your pet virus? And no. No apples for you doctor. You don’t deserve apples. Apples are for people who don't do unethical science on their friends!

Episode 16: Painfully Ever After

This one is not going to be as detailed because I'm also half doing work, but I have no self control and need to know more.

...My goodness I really AM like Eiffel. I think it's the ADHD. Let's blame that.

Also..."navigation off by a few clicks...probably not important".

Um...not critical maybe, but why is navigation off? Don't think you can just slip little details like that in there and not expect me to notice. Don't think you can use my own schemes against me.

Remember when Mincowski nearly shot Hilbert over ice cream? Those were the days...

Man this apple is delicious 😋🍎.

And yeah. No painfully ever after. We still have several seasons left. We need Hera!

I agree about the math Eiffel. I got a test coming up. I should be studying, but this is clearly more important.

Ugh. Don't give Hilbert food. Not a lot at least and not the good stuff. Just enough to keep him alive. Barely anything. I want him to be nothing but skin and bones.

Don't like the ominous music.

Everyone has their limits...oh good point! Hilbert needed a fail safe plan. DO NOT SHUT THE DOOR. DO NOT TALK TO HIM.

DON'T LET HIM FIX HERA HE'S GOING TO HURT HER CODE. EXACTLY! HE IS GOING TO TRY SOMETHING! AND I'D BE A LITTLE PARANOID TOO IF EVERYONE AROUND ME HAD SO MANY SECRETS!

"I'd do anything to help get her back online again, but I'm not letting him mess around in her mind again. She deserves better" / "Yes she does" 🥺

Hera! You need to come back! You need to know that your friends care about you!

...and...and I really hope Cutter isn't already doing anything to her to make her betray them. I really hope so.

Cranial reconstruction surgery? Wow, they really did model her after a human brain. Dangerous move.

And Hilbert. Dude. Lack of trust? You. Tried. To. Murder. Everyone. On. Board.

Why would they trust you?

"Tell me you're not still obsessing over your experimental exposure, as long as I maintain it's dormancy, you have nothing to worry about." Oh great. I can't tell you how many times I've read or heard in fiction that as long as X doesn't happen, then Y won't happen, and X is such a low probability it probably isn't even worth worrying about.

Sure, what could possibly go wrong? It's just a teeny tiny itty bitty baby killer virus 🦠🥺 all it wants to do is swim around in Doug's blood stream and not make any trouble I'm sure.

Improve the lives of millions? Uh, Hilbert. What exactly is your definition of improvement?

Yeah...how was command aware of alien life? What made them want to look for that?

"Survival depends on never ever keeping information from Mr. Cutter"

...

Oh dear.

And what does Mr. Cutter want with aliens? Probably to kill them, that seems to be a hobby of his. I guess he got bored of killing members of his own species and animals from his own planet so he decided to set his sights farther afield.

CHANGES IN PROGRAM? But...what about Hera? The Hera that's our friend? ...don't like that noise... REALLY don't like that noise.

HILBERT WHAT DID YOU DO?

HILBERT WHAT DID YOU DO?

HILBERT. YOU IDIOT. YOU BUFFOON. YOU USELESS DUM-DUM.

Wait.

HERA!!!!!!!!

She's alive 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

YIPPIE!!!!!! 🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳

Hm. Looks likes Hera's back. A bit more sarcastic, but she's back. And yeah, get Hilbert away.

Hera saved them! I knew she could do it! 🥰

Glad alpha victor is deleted. But we should keep the gag on. He could have more code.

Good job captain. Use those direct orders!

Something to write with? Oh boy...what on earth has Hilbert been doing?

“I missed you.” Aw. “ I wanna hang out with you and talk”. Aw. See Hera. They do care. 🥺 Aw he's sleeping. 😴 Goodnight Doug. Hopefully there will be answers in the morning.

Episode 17: Bach to the Future

I like the title. Does this mean the music is coming back?

Yeah Hilbert. Have a good long think about what you've done.

Wait are they...bored? Bored because there is no crisis? But there's like a thousand mysteries on board on the ship.

"It's like someone moved everything off just a tiny bit...so small that you don't even notice anything's off until you try to find something, and then you can't find anything".

Why do I think that's not just a metaphor for Hera's brain?

Star charts? Why do I think those might not be harmless?

Rock climbing and trail hiking are good hobbies. And... yeah a bit odd she has a husband she hasn't seen in over a year and hasn't told any of them about.

HERA 😂. "I though that was a typo".

Mr. Kodeleka? (I think that's the spelling). Foreign correspondent for the globe?

Oh dear. Oh Mincowski. This is so sad. She needs to get home now. 💔

More music! 🎶📻

Aw, Hera. 🥰 I love watching them become better friends.

Why DID they send you up here? Something to keep him occupied? Keep him from being bored? What IS his job? Dying, but what else?

...not all superintelligences are created equal. And who made you randomized? Wait you did psych evals and behavioral tests? That's a lot emotionally for the first six months of your existence. Even if you have adult superintelligence auto-established, you still don't have experience using it. Or practice controlling your emotions. In a lot of ways, you’re still just a kid. A baby even.

Hera...Hera what happened to you? No, Hera you and Doug matter so much. Wait was Hera crying?

Oh yeah the music? Bach...and yeah Doug she has recording capabilities. She could play that back easily. You lost.

Only one star? Glessee 163? 46 light years away from current position? Red dwarf, similar to Wolf359? Interesting...

Did they send a different crew to 163?

555? Oh finally one she doesn't know! "Good communication habits. Be in touch with other crewmembers."

Bet over. Wow. Doug has really been holding that in.

Haha...oh dear. 59 mins 29 sec. Poor Doug. Close but no cigar. Ha, exactly.

Oh dear. Doug has broken. Hilbert ugh why is he still on the line?

Episode 18: Happy To Be Of Assistance

"Why was it that easy to kill everyone! I never thought it would be that easy!"

...uh Hera? Why were you thinking about it at all? Did Cutter do something to you? Are you trying to kill them and like...dragging your...hypothetical feet about it?

Oh good the hidden lab.

...hopefully the spiders are dead...

And hopefully this is where they FINALLY remember who Lovelace is.

Alien Mothership? Advanced scout? Back of head and under tentacles? Is this a joke? Oh it is. I like her.

Lambert? Who is this?

Day 97, early in the mission then. So who is the crew? Dr. Selburg. Dr. Who and Who? Officer Fischer? Okay so Lambert is communications? Reya? Oh so that's their AI. But it looks like she just beeps.

Ha their reactions to Lovelace😂

Yeah they have a lot of crew. Gen0 AI? Hm.

Day 383. Wait WHOSE PROJECTIONS WERE OFF? (Hilbert?)

Day 435. Selburg again. Oh Fischer is dead. Oh dear. Weird that Hilbert isn't mentioned when he had other missions. I wonder what name he was using.

Yeah...Day 944...so they left them? Weird that the timelines don't match up.

Oh wow...when they are in the room Hera can't even tell who she's speaking too. Unless...yeah something's up.

More Lovelace: At night when alone? Noise in the walls? Um...Blessie? Empty man? Anyone?

Another crew member died. Oh dear. It seems Dr. Selburg survived a good while. I hope that's not Hilbert's alias.

Oh. The crew member who died. He had a family too. 🥺.

Cutter needs to be ended.

Lovelace, I don't think Goddard Futuristics ever cared to begin with. Sam Lambert. So that's his name.

Run and hide? Dr. Selburg and Lovelace have a way off? Um...maybe don't tell them that. But I love the attitude.

Eiffel, this seems like a bit of a happy attitude, if they got away, then um... where are they now?

A message for who?

I KNEW IT. I KNEW IT. OH I KNEW IT I KNEW IT I KNEW IT IT'S SELBURG BUT ALSO HILBERT ISN'T IT AND HE TOTALLY MURDERED LOVELACE OH HE IS SO GETTING TOSSED OUT THE AIRLOCK NOW!

Oh I do not have time for one more episode...but... dang it I just saw the title. I have to know. First I'm gonna listen to Goodbye Earl by the Dixie Chicks to pump myself up.

One moment please.

Episode 19: Let's Kill Hilbert

And...we're back! Now it's time to say goodbye to our crazy science friend. Adios Hilbert you will not be missed! 👋 First we toss you out the airlock, and then it's back to earth to finish off Mr. Cutter and company!

Does Hilbert know enough to justify keeping him on board? The real question is: will he share enough?

And listen to Hera. She might have things she's trying to tell you as best she can.

Hera...oh Hera has PTSD. Oh dear Hera.

Um... is she trying to kill them? In comedically obvious ways so that they notice? No wonder she needs Hilbert dead, what if he gave her bad code again? Or maybe she’s just experiencing trauma.

Mincowski! No! She's trying to save you! Please just throw Hilbert out the airlock, I listened to Dixie Chicks for this! I hyped myself up!

Did Hera just say "I'm dead?"

Hera. Hera are you trying to kill Doug? Doug, I trust Hera too, but I do not trust Hilbert! Okay...looks like we're good...

Never mind.

Eiffel. What is happening? Are you on laughing gas? Are you being drugged? Oh dear. Hera what did you do?

Wait. Why is HE losing air? Hera...were you trying to kill Hilbert?

Do machines dream electric sheep? Was that Hilbert? What happened to Hilbert? OH NO.

"You're going to unplug me anyway at least I can do this for the two of you" oh Hera 🥺

I love it. Save our moron!

And everyone's okay.

Doug knows Hera's there. Aw, he's making her feel better. And she's back! 🥰

Wait. What about Hilbert? What about interrogating him about being the other doctor guy? What about killing him? Man, what a bummer.

Oh well. we can always hope. Maybe next time he can finally die. Or at least give us some information.

Episode 20: The Paranoia Game

I really should not be listening to more, but I have an exam tomorrow, and nothing gets me motivated like good old procrastination. Besides, it's not like I had much of a chance on that thing anyway. Oh, I mean, um: Don't listen to me kids, studying is important. But you'll understand if you get to certain level of school at a certain age. You discover that some things that you thought were bad and confusing are actually much more bad and confusing than you could have ever imagined.

Anyway, let's get into it.

Oh good some info on Hilbert's past missions. Hilbert it is ABSOLUTELY relevant. You were experimenting on humans without their consent!

Lovelace was incinerated? Hilbert, for your sake, you better hope that's not true.

Who is listening to this?

Oh dear Hilbert is out of his cage. And YES the handcuffs are necessary. Hilbert has some nerve asking these questions.

"Why am I in cuffs. Seriously all I did was try to kill you. So dramatic🙄"

Irregularity in backup life support? What was that?

Screwdriver is missing. Huh. I wonder where it could have gone...check his pockets.

But then there is the empty man...and Blessie...

Shut up Hilbert. You had someone else help you get the screwdriver. The invisible empty man or someone else. Your promises mean NOTHING Hilbert.

✨ Nooooooooooooo... ✨

Oh you know who took it do you Hilbert? BLAMING THE ROBOT? She has a NAME Hilbert. And if she wanted you dead, she could do that in much worse ways than stealing the screw driver.

"Everything is always Hilbert's fault"

IT KIND OF IS HILBERT WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? NOW IS NOT THE TIME TO GET ON YOUR HIGH "I WOULD NEVER STEAL A SCREW DRIVER HORSE" YOU TRIED TO MURDER EVERYONE.

And do you REALLY think even IF Hera did this, that her whole plan is gonna go like this: "Well we were cool with Hilbert being on board earlier, but GASP! a stolen screwdriver? I can deal with multiple counts of attempted murder and unethical experimentation, but this is simply a bridge too far. TO THE AIRLOCK!"

Yeah. And also. How does she steal the screw driver?

Oh goodness. She is the brains you are...not brains.😂

Hilbert. YOU are the one involved in a conspiracy. You're seeing plots where there aren't any. I guess the old saying is true. The wicked run from no one.

"How do you like that" "I like it just fine"

...no comment.

Oh poor commander. I hope they didn't...

...oh they did.

Good heavens. Have you all forgotten about Blessie? Have you all forgotten about the empty man?

"Mistake Eiffel was going to make"..."Evil plan Hilbert was cooking up" PLEASE 😂😂😂

I love that these are the same voice actor. It makes in 20x funnier too.

The perfect crime? Do you know how crazy you sound?

Poor Mincowski. She needs to go back home and be with her husband. After all this she deserves it.

Hilbert. It involves Large powerful magnet. 😂😂🧲

Yes PLEASE put your clothes back on. Good heavens.

Ah yes. Those sounds. PLEASE question them.

What if we are not the only ones here? FINALLY. Hilbert, I don't like you but at least we're getting to...wait Hera I thought you did detect something moving about earlier.

WHAT IS GOING FOR THE TOOL BOX?

Tentacle with a flower? Of course, Percival B. Eternal, you silly goof!

But uh...why would it want a screw driver? EXACTLY! It is a bad thing! Why has no one been asking more questions about this?

Well hopefully we'll FINALLY get more of dear Blessie. Thank you for listening to my reactions my friends. I'm enjoying season 2, and hope to have more for you soon. Bye-bye.

[nobodysdaydreams]

I WAITED ALL THIS TIME FOR CUTTER’S TRAGIC BACKSTORY AND IT’S THAT HE GOT HIS TELESCOPE STOLEN AS A TEENAGER AND DECLARED REVENGE?

Oh, well then, forget Hilbert’s family dying of radiation, Jacobi’s guilt over his failures, and Maxwell’s alienation from her family, THIS was the sad villain backstory the show was building up to. And Cutter is so serious about it too, y’all I can’t. 🤣

(Or my reaction to Wolf359’s Special Episode: Volte Face)

Hi Dear Readers. Gonna be doing some work during this one, but I hope you like the reaction regardless because I've put off enough, but I hope you enjoy it anyway. Here we go!

Tagging the mutuals who got me invested in this, and if you want to be tagged or untagged from these posts, lmk, or you can follow my blog or simply follow the tag "#bods wolf359 reactions". Anyone who has followed me for a while knows my updates are inconsistent, so I apologize in advance for that and for any spelling/grammar mistakes in my posts.

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs @herawell @commsroom @lovelyladylavie

Special Episode: Volte Face

Huh. A few years before the start of the show. This should be interesting.

Oh ew Rachel.

Wait is this her origin story?

Enlil (yes I looked up the spelling this time, yes I was careful, and yes I did this after the reaction) is so cheery. Like Cutter if he was actually nice.

Wait. Why are they calling her “Miss. Nash”?

Oh. They tried to kill her at the hotel. And she seems to know they’d try to do this, is totally okay with it, and willingly getting on a plan with them? Okay?

Don’t like this David Clark fellow.

Nash is not nice Enlil. She’s not nice at all.

Does Cutter kill or hire all the reporters that come to his door? If so, I hope Minkowski’s husband is okay.

The safety video is on mute? That’s symbolic.

The AI is the only character I like.

Andrea Nash? Am I hearing this wrong, I swear that’s Rachel Young.

So Enlil got the job Hera wanted. Flying a fancy jet all day. Hera did say that’s what happens when you’re happy and do as you’re told.

Huh. Did not expect Cutter to be a Harry Potter fan.

Ew not Cutter doing the “welcome to Wolf359” I hate it.

Was Goddard the OG Marcus? Wright-Goddard? Interesting… let’s see… 40s, 50s, 60s… AI.

Renamed in 1974… so that’s significant. Also when Cutter says “things no monkey could do” why do I think he means humans?

1976. So that’s when he took control.

People? I don’t like the sound of that.

Change the world for the better? …no. I respectfully disagree.

Oh she’s not asking about certain things. Restraining bolt?

“where were we” “how you were gonna change the world for the better” 🤣 yeah. Right after he removes everyone’s free will, sure.

Are all these people that are being listed Cutter? That’s a lot of new people.

Right they all disappeared.

Do the names of the stars have a similar pattern that the fake names have?

What does she mean by “I have EVERYTHING”? What is everything? Like… everything everything?

Oh they got that restraining bolt.

David. I think Cutter might decide to give you the restraining bolt instead.

“The same reason you don’t hold this job for more than a decade” DANG!

Matthew Newman?

Oh that’s him isn’t it? The real him?

IS THAT A GUN?

This escalated so quick.

Oh she got him. And Cutter took this so personally.

Come on Cutter. Drop the backstory. Oh Andrea Nash isn’t her name either.

Yep. Matthew Newman. Here he is.

Ah. A little high school student poking his nose where it didn’t belong. Oh so Cutter has been infatuated with aliens since he was a boy.

Wait. That’s it? The government took his telescope when he was 15 and he declared revenge? That’s his sad backstory? That’s the best he could do?

Oh and then he got fired when someone had to take the fall at the company. That too. But he still said he declared revenge when he was in high school? This is ridiculous. And further proof that science nerds who are also over dramatic theater kids cannot be trusted (expect for me because I’m special 🥰).

Oh so when Matthew left he gave the restructure order. I see… but then how did he get the new bodies?

He found Miranda Pryce. But how did she have the tech?

Maybe he used plastic surgery the first time around.

Oh. He was Miranda’s first test subject. And she wanted to manipulate the human body probably because of her blindness.

“Revenge is fun” “you can just steal one” “space exploration is only part of the bigger picture: progress. I want a better future” put those three statements together and tell me if you sound like a good guy, Cutter.

I see. So rather than stop him, Nash wants in so that she can have a hand in it. She’s just as gross as he is.

“No” *cuts to Andrea as Rachel head of special projects*

Cutter has seen Monsters Inc?

“More productive use” “Volte Face” okay this is the part where you should have brought a gun… oh the wave radiation. Good thing she’s knows that. I guess that’s enough to give Cutter the job. Rough day for you David.

Oh she has to reinvent herself. Rachel. Yep. So this is how she got here. I don’t like her. She knows what Cutter’s about, and her response is she wants in? Absolute worst.

“Goodbye Miss. Nash”

Well that was sort of a dark ending. You either willingly give up your humanity to join Pryce and Cutter or they take it. One way or another.

Anyway, now we know more about Rachel and Cutter. Gotta say, his sad backstory is funnier and lamer than I could have ever imagined. I was, bear minimum, expecting something like the board members who pushed him out of the company were close personal friends, or maybe his parents yelled at him and forced him to give up his space dreams or even a line about the kids at school laughing at him for being a high schooler who believed in aliens. But nope. He stumbled upon something, got his telescope stolen by the government and was like “you know what? I’m gonna spend the rest of my life and several more lifetimes getting revenge for this specifically.” The people who took the dang telescope aren’t even alive anymore! Look, I get they also ransacked his house and yelled at him, which is a lot for a teenager, but to respond by declaring revenge then and there and plotting world domination, I just…

I mean, I guess the moral of the story is don’t inconvenience a young science genius if they’re also a dramatic theater kid. Because they will immediately jump to world domination and change their name as part of that process and befriend(?) an evil woman who gives them next level tech. It’s happened too many times in too many of my fandoms (well two so far, show Curtain and Cutter. At least show Curtain’s sad thing was that his family left him. Still not an excuse considering his brother was also a kid at the time, but it’s better than a telescope).

I can see why you all hyped this up. It’s hilarious, but also shows how being affiliated with Cutter makes people slowly lose their humanity (again, one way or another) despite Cutter calling himself a “people person”.

Also if Rachel knows about the modified bodies, does that mean she has one? Or maybe she’s not old enough yet.

On a more serious note: Rachel’s character makes me sad. She could use her powers for good and expose so many bad people. And it sounds like she did for a while. But then she decided to sell out. Disappointing. What a waste. And since Rachel and Andrea were both fake names… we might never learn who she really is. Or maybe that doesn’t matter, since that person, who ever she was, no longer exists. Again, Cutter and Pryce do specialize in taking away other people’s humanity.

Well. Only 2 hours left. Not tonight, but later. When I have time to really sit and give a good listen. We’re in the endgame now dear readers. I hope y’all are ready!