#wow good job you hecking good boi chocolate sir

[batwynn]

I love how everyone over on Chocolate Man’s Instagram is like:

Wow, Amaury Guichon, sparkling good job my chap!

And everyone over here is like:

HAVE you SEEN what the FUCKING CHocLATE MAN did TODAY?! THAT FUCKING FUCKER-

[funeral-clown]

@heckyeahharrisco for harriscofest

@aquaexplicit eeyyyyyyy

prompt: mob boss au

Harry adjusted his tie in the car mirror for the fourth time that evening. Hartley let out a deep sigh.

“You look fine, boss. Great, even.”

Harry waved his comments away with a frustrated face and began running his hands through his hair. Hartley sat up straighter, alarmed, and pulled his hands away.

“I did not spend thirty minutes in your bathroom with hair gel for you to mess it up now!”

“I look ridiculous!” Harry snapped, tugging his hands out of his grip.

“Shut up, he’s going to like it! Even if he doesn’t, I picked out the best dinner spot in the city. Order the chocolate mousse for desert, and you’re going to have a second date.”

“Whatever,” he muttered, mentally filing the information away.

Hartley rolled his eyes and went back to his phone. The car pulled up in front of the restaurant. 

“Try not to have too much fun, we have a meeting with the Russians tomorrow.”

“Right.”

“And remember the wine order we went over.”

“I’ve got it.”

“And don’t forget the boutonniere!”

“Is this my date or yours?”

Hartley smirked. 

“I’d like to think of it as our date. If everything goes well, he’ll be joining the family!”

“No, he won’t.” A tinge of warning hung on his tone.

“Harrison. You’re the head of the biggest crime syndicate in the city. He’s not an idiot, you met him at a Science Expo. He’s going to figure it out.”

“No,” Harry said firmly. “Cisco Ramon can never know he’s going on a date with a mob boss.”

~

Cisco Ramon had a date with a mob boss.

When Harrison Wells, one of the CCPD’s biggest Persons of Interest (at least according to Barry), approached him at the annual Science Expo, he thought he was going to be kidnapped at worst, given a job offer at best.

Hey, what can he say? His experimental weapon designs were well known in certain circles. A man’s gotta have a hobby, after all.

So when the man struck up a conversation instead, looming awkwardly over him in the crowded hall, muttering about the different tech, he was a bit taken aback. He recovered quickly. If the guy wanted to have a chat, well, Cisco could indulge him.

Harrison(You can call me Harry)’s face when he started talking back was...something distressingly close to relieved. Drunk Barry was not one to skimp on details, Cisco knew what this man had done, knew he was smart enough to not get caught, but somehow. Somehow, crowded in and discussing lasers, he just seemed...Adorable.

When he asked him out, Cisco only hesitated a little before giving him a yes. The look on his face threw any lingering doubts out the window. Harry clearly wasn’t trying to trap him. Probably didn’t even know Cisco knew who he was.

Cisco still slides one of his prototypes into his suit jacket. He’s not a complete moron.

Harry is waiting for him when he gets to the place (and holy shit, being a criminal mastermind must come with serious perks, because Carter and Kendra had been trying to get a reservation here for weeks) and offers him his arm and a boutonniere.

“It’s a gardenia,” he muttered, “You don’t have to take it if you don’t like it.”

Cisco smiled and pinned it to his chest, trying hard not to laugh at the slight blush on his face.

He beat a man to death with a crowbar, Cisco, he’s not a damn puppy.

They walk in and are seated. Cisco lets himself be a little impressed by the surroundings. The building is tastefully decorated without giving way to opulence, and the lighting is low and romantic.

“I have to say, Harry, you pick a heck of a place to show a guy a good time.”

He gives a small smile. “In the interest of honesty, I know nothing about dating locations and such. I had one of my business associates recommend it to me. It’s my first time here.”

“Well tell your associate that they have good taste. If the chocolate mousse here is as good as they say, you’re definitely getting a second date.”

“I’ll make note of that.” Harry chuckles, seeing some unknown humor.

They place their orders and he doesn’t even blink when Cisco orders the most expensive thing on the menu. Good sign.

“Don’t worry,” he says with a wink, “I put out on the first date.”

Harry chokes on his wine. The waiter chokes on air before rushing off with the menus. Cisco lets himself chuckle then.

“That’s, uh. Good t-to know.” His hands are shaky as he brings his napkin to his mouth. Clearing his throat, he leans forward. “Look, if I’ve made you feel pressured in any way- I mean, it’s not that I’m uninterested, obviously, of course not, you’re lovely, but honestly, I’m not expecting-”

Cisco places one of his hands over his own.

“Harry. You’re rambling. Relax.” His voice is amused. 

“Right,” Harry takes a deep breath, “Right.”

“Haven’t been on a date in a while, huh?”

Harry shook his head, smiling sardonically.

“It’s that obvious? No, my work prevents me from getting out like this much.”

Yeah, Cisco bets it does.

“I guess I should be flattered, then. Speaking of, what did you say your work was, again?”

~

Harry froze, staring blankly ahead with a deer in the headlights look.

“I, um. I work in acquisitions and distribution. For a large company in town. I’m the head of that department, actually.”

Cisco smiles. Smooth, Harrison. You only stumbled a little. His date rests his head on his hand, arm propped up on the table.

“Wow, that sounds fascinating. Tell me more.”

“Oh, it’s, uh. Its nothing, really. Boring, even. But I do well for myself. We had a merger this afternoon, which should bring us even more revenue.”

The Irish were tough negotiators, but apply enough pressure and they agreed well enough. Especially when the pressure was on their throat.

“Judging by the blood on your neck, I take it the merger went well.”

Harry swore, bringing his hand up to the side of his neck. A few flecks of dried blood scraped off. Cisco smiled serenely.

“I cut myself shaving.”

“I’m sure that’s the case. Although I could make a joke about cutthroat business practices.”

Harry huffs out a small laugh, mentally cursing out Rathaway for not noticing the blood in the car. Still, Cisco seemed to be buying it. People nicked themselves shaving all the time. Harry was in the clear.

Cisco opened his mouth, doubtless to ask more questions, only for the waiter arrive with their food. He blushed slightly as he set down Cisco’s plate. Harry frowned as he walked away.

He was distracted by Cisco eating. More specifically, the deeply satisfied noises he made while eating. His eyes shut as he made small groans of pleasure. Harry’s fist tightened around his silverware. There were going to be indents in his hands at this point. His fork started to bend slightly.

“Dude.”

“Hmmm?”

“Are you even gonna eat your food? It’s, like, the best goddamn thing I’ve ever tasted.”

Harry bets he would be.

“Yeah, sorry. Lost in thought.”

“Anything you’d like to share?”

Never.

“Not particularly.”

Cisco shrugged before going back to eating.

“Suit yourself, man.”

Harry’s sure his dinner was delicious, but he barely tasted a bite of it. Cisco excused himself to wash his face (lobster can be a mess to eat, butter sauce dripping everywhere, and as enthralling as it was to watch him chase the droplets with his tongue, Harry understood). With a deep and contented sigh, he lets himself relax into the chair.

The waiter came by to clear their plates.

“Can I get you anything else this evening, sir?”

“Two orders of the chocolate mousse.”

“Ah, looking for a second date, huh? Can’t say I blame you.” The waiter gave him a knowing smile. Harry tensed, smile rigid on his face. He seriously considers throttling the man before Cisco returns, beaming at him as he takes his seat.

“I hope you don’t mind, I took the liberty of ordering some dessert.”

“Not at all. I’ve got a sweet tooth that pretty much takes up my whole mouth.”

Harry will have to remember that.

“You know, I’ve been bothering you with questions all night-”

“It’s not a bother.”

Cisco smiles sweetly at him.

“And that’s very kind of you. But you haven’t asked me any questions yet. Do you want to?”

There were plenty of things Harry wanted to ask Cisco. How do you feel about dating career criminals, for example. Are you enjoying yourself as much as I am. Do you like kids because I have a daughter studying abroad and I think you would adore each other.

What comes out of his mouth is very different.

“So, do you bring a gun to all your dates, or am I just special?”

Cisco startled, eyes widening before something resembling a smirk slides it’s way onto his face. It’s more attractive than it has any right to be.

“Well a boy should always carry protection if he plans on having fun, Harry.”

Harry swallows down the sudden excess of saliva in his mouth.

“But don’t worry. I still think you’re plenty special.”

The chocolate mousse arrives and Harry tries to kid himself that the glazed look on his date’s eyes has something to do with himself.

“It’s not a gun, by the way.”

“Hmmm?”

“It’s not a gun. It’s a prototype taser I’ve been tweaking. I’m an engineer, making toys is kinda my thing.”

“You consider a taser a toy?”

“Considering I’m also developing a gun that can achieve absolute zero? Hell yeah it’s a toy. It’s not even lethal, ‘cause I like you so much.”

Harry doesn’t even pretend to hide the effect his words have on him. His tongue feels heavy in his mouth as something deep and dark inside him purrs.

“You’re perfect,” he murmurs, and watches as the other man’s face reddens. Cisco’s eyes, in the dim light of the dining area, seem to become impossibly darker.

“Nah,” he chokes out lightly, “This mousse is perfect. Seriously, Harry. You gotta try this.”

Harrison lets the moment slide, popping a spoonful in his mouth. It’s good. He can think of something that would taste better.

“Cisco-”

“Alright, here’s your check! We hope you had a good time with us this evening, please come back again!”

The waiter drops the check between them, breaking whatever trance held them. He has the audacity to wink at them. Harry curbs the growl building in his throat and clenches his fists. He pays for the meal, even goes against his instincts and leaves a decent tip.

They finish their dessert and Harry escorts Cisco out of the restaurant.

“I had a good time,” he says gently, “Thank you for your company.”

“I feel like I should be thanking you, here. The food was amazing, and you weren’t so bad yourself, Harry.” Cisco grins brightly at him.

“Yes, well.” He tries to fight the blush he can feel rising. He was a grown man, dammit. “Let me escort you to your car.”

“Oh, I took a cab. I can always wait for one to come pick me up, don’t worry about it.”

Harry frowned. 

“Or, y’know. You could give me a ride back to mine. It’s a bit of a mess, but there’s coffee.”

“How could you possibly still be hun-” Oh. Oh.

Cisco laughs.

“I don’t understand how anyone could be scared of you. You’re a dork. I love it.”

“I would be more than happy to give you a ride.”

“Well, I should hope so.” Cisco winks.

Harry is going to give Hartley a raise. And a vacation. And-

His car pulls up to curb and he opens the door. Cisco slides in and he follows after. Something about his words nags at him.

“Cisco.”

“Harry.” His tone is teasing.

“You mentioned something about people being afraid of me.”

“Well yeah,” Cisco chuckles, before sliding closer, “You’re kinda the biggest mob boss in the city.”

All of the air in Harry’s chest leaves him.

“Wha-Y-I-”

Cisco slips onto Harry’s lap and stops his stammering with a kiss.

“Yes,” he says affectionately. “I know. Kinda knew the entire time.”

“Then why-”

“Because I don’t actually care all that much. Now are you going to get with the program, here, or-”

Harry pulls him in roughly, stopping his words with his tongue and his teeth.

“I was right,” he pants out, “You are perfect.”

Cisco lets out a small laugh, squirming closer. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

The car starts moving, partitions up (thank god), and Harry’s hand goes to Cisco’s waist, steadying him against him as his other hand finds his way into his hair. He pulls it, dragging his head back and exposing his throat, letting his mouth slide over Cisco’s neck and pulling soft strangled noises out of him before Cisco pushes their mouths back together.

The hand on Cisco’s waist drifts lower, pulling him in tighter, closer, until they can’t be discerned from each other, until they share a body, unti-

Harry’s phone starts ringing.

He ignores it.

It rings again. Hartley’s ringtone. Fuck.

Reluctantly, he drags his face away from Cisco’s and picks it up.

“What?” he snaps, temper high.

“Boss. We have an emergency. We need you down at the docks.”

“I’m a little busy, here, Rathaway.”

The sound of gunshots blares through the phone.

“Harrison. Please. Now.”

Snarling, he throws his phone into the seat beside him.

“Something come up, Harry?”

“Work. I’m afraid we’re going to have to cut the evening short.”

Cisco sighs.

“Alright. Guess I shoulda seen this coming. Didn’t expect it so soon, though.”

Harrison barks out a short, bitter laugh.

“My driver will still take you home. It’s only a few blocks for me, I could use the exercise. I’ll call you in the morning.”

Harry calls the car to a stop and steps out.

Cisco looks torn. “Harry-” he sighs. “Be safe, Harry.”

The words warm him in the cool night air. He leans down and presses a final gentle kiss to his lips.

“I’ll call you in the morning.”

It’s a promise he intends to keep.

He watches the car drive off and walks briskly off. The walk settles him a little. By the time he gets to the docks, the situation has reached it’s zenith.

Good.

Then he can blow off some steam.