#yenn and jaskier are just going to mope over him a bit

[jupitermelichios]

i have two chapters of a yennskier fic written and i think it's one of the best things i've written in ages, it's fun, i'm really happy with the character voices, there's lots of fun worldbuilding, a banging set-up, a bunch of ocs who i adore who slot naturally into the story... I even have a title!

and i have absolutely 0 ideas for plot. none. nothing. everything i have so far is just getting yen and jaskier to the same place to start the adventure, and bugger all concept of what that adventure should be

periodically i open the doc and reread what i've got and decide i definitely need to come up with a plot, because i love everything i've written, and then i get to the end, and remember that wishing for plot to manifest doesn't actually work, and sadly close the doc and go back to my other fics

if i could just think of some kind of actual story, it would be so good!

[mimsyaf]

I am watching The Witcher S3:

It is impossible (for me, ymmv) to give 2 shits about anyone in this fucking show except Yenn, that elf guy who Siri Ciri used to hang out with for a bit when she was fleeing Nilfgard in S1, Jaskier (but only because Joey Batey is marvelous), and Cahir because we stan one (1) deranged fanatic, and I guess also Fringilla because she seems as over it all as I am. Oh and Istredd my beloved, who so far has been in a total of 10 seconds of this season.

And you might say, well Mimsy, that’s a lot of people. To which I would reply that THERE ARE SO SO MANY FUCKING PEOPLE IN THIS and it is so confusing but not in a “keep up with the clever twists” kind of way but a what the fuck is ever happening at any given time kind of way. Like, everyone’s got at least 3 agendas and are double crossing each other all the time but I can’t keep track of ANY of it. And there are just too many existential threats. But anyway, despite the people I mentioned above that I do want to actually see, instead I am watching hours of footage of That Fire Dude, the king’s ambiguously rascally gay brother who I want to like but I seriously don’t have a clue what his deal is and also he needs to open his mouth more when he talks, Fucking Francesca and Filavandrel (I thought HE was supposed to be King of the Elves or whatever, but he just mopes around after her sorry ass), Fucking Francesca’s Brother Who Is At Least Now Dead, that other elf guy who talked like Bill Pullman and who was annoying but at least he also hated Francesca, Meanface Tissaia, That Very Hot Sorcerer Guy from S2 who I guess is sleeping with Tissaia and is leading the sorcerers or at least the AMAB ones (do THEY get turned into eels, or is that fate just reserved for girls), that guy who I think is supposed to be a dwarf but is mostly just Scottish. that Redanian king and his spymaster Dykstra or however he spells his name (actually I would climb that old man like a tree but I hate his stupid storyline also because I have no idea what he and bird lady are even trying to DO), The White Flame Who I Guess Used To Be The Hedgehog Guy but seriously the actor playing him is like 30, I guess he fathered Ciri when he was 16, Ciri Herself, Geralt’s offscreen-fridged mother, that Druid lady (I like her werewolf bf though), that fake version of Ciri who sometimes talks in a weird voice, and The Wild Hunt. Who I guess are supposed to be terrifying but who just remind me of Gwar tbh. Oh and maybe Simon Callow is in it, or was? Above all I do not give a flying fuck about Geralt, which is kind of a problem. He’s BORING. He’s so BORING. And he’s onscreen so much of the time.

I dunno, people’s fic about the video games made them sound fun, were those fun? This is decidedly more unfun with each season although it is kind of queer and has many many beautiful people to look at. It also has a lot of non-specific vibes and I guess I’m watching for that. But if one more person says “The Continent” again I am going to lose my shit.

[kelpiemomma]

a little more geraskier beauty and the beast i guess??

this got long so it’s 99% under the cut

►Yennefer was actually able to figure out during the first stay of Geralt and Jaskier (it was three days long, and Jaskier had never felt more like a piece of meat before) that Jaskier didn’t have just one curse on him. The whole of him was too intricate, so she wasn’t able to help much beyond telling Geralt to come back for longer next time. When they did come back, a few months later with no other news on Jaskier’s curse, she discovered that it was three separate curses- one to take away his voice, one to take away his ability to play the lute, and one to take away his looks. Three separate curses from three separate people all forced onto one person. That’s part of why she said true love’s kiss could break the curse- because something so pure could cancel it all out. Otherwise she would have needed to use some very valuable, rare herbs and conduits in order to fix Jaskier and that... would’ve been too much work when she could see what was right before her eyes.

►Cursed Jaskier is a good few inches taller than Geralt, but he’s still not as wide. He’s covered in fur from head to toe, has claws on both his hands and his feet (which are more like paws, there), has a thick ruff of fur on his neck. There are ears on top of his head, the most pathetic excuse for a tail coming out of his spine, and his face looks like a bear and a wolf had a child and then tried to smother it. There’s something not quite unlike a muzzle but still not a muzzle on his face, his eyes are just a bit too sharp to be human, but too round to be animal, and it’s like the tip of his nose can’t decide if it’s muzzle or human. Jaskier refuses to look into any mirrors.

►Jaskier literally cannot go into any town when he’s cursed. No matter how well they try to hide him, something gives him away whether it’s a hand (claw) accidentally showing, or him trying to speak (and the fact that his voice sounds like a literal growl? not helping), or that one time a child grabbed his cloak and yoinked it off of him. Jaskier bemoans to Geralt that the curse wasn’t just against his body, it was against his ability to be comfortable (and he’s honestly probably onto something there). Geralt ignores him (mostly) but knows that it bothers Jaskier more than he likes to admit. For one, Geralt knows it’s been years since Jaskier was in an actually, truly comfortable place to sleep. For another, he would like to bathe in warm water once in a while and leaving Jaskier to sleep alone in the outside of town is asking for a second monster hunt. Jaskier always pretends he’s fine and puts on a fine show of not being bothered that he can’t go into town, but by the way that he bothers Geralt for information on the goings-on when Geralt returns, it’s clear that he misses human communication and the intricacies of human nature. Realizing this actually gets Geralt to open up a bit more - or at least talk more - because besides Yennefer (who’s iffy with communication at Best), he’s the only person Jaskier has any communication with. →The first time Jaskier goes into a town after the curse is broken, he’s nervous as hell. He’s gotten so used to being driven out of towns that even though he knows he’s cured, he’s still afraid that he’s going to suddenly sprout fur and fangs and claws again and be chased out. He’s got a death grip on his lute the entire way to the inn. When he and Geralt manage to get a room, he barely manages to make it to their room before he’s crying in relief that they actually made it and that he’s still human. Geralt offers him an awkward shoulder pat because... just ‘cause they love each other doesn’t mean he’s gotten better at reassuring Jaskier of anything.

►Roach actually doesn’t mind Jaskier, even when he’s furry. The first few days were a bit rough because she’s a Witcher’s horse, that’s a monster, why are they not killing it?? Jaskier plies her with sweet grasses and fruits from trees, and then she becomes quite fond of him. Geralt makes exactly one (1) “she probably thinks you’re related with all the fur” joke before Jaskier’s moping (and Roach’s intentional tripping over every stone and hole in the road) make him apologize (”i think you’re closer in relation to a mole rat, actually” “was that... supposed to make me feel better?” “less fur.” “...thanks?”). The fact that Jaskier can climb trees to get her treats makes her more fond of him. →When Jaskier sees Roach again as a human, she’s like “what the hell” and it takes her a minute to reconcile the human to the formerly cursed fuzzy thing. She tends to be a bit more protective of Jaskier after, because she recognizes that he no longer has claws and fangs to protect him. Geralt notices it (and approves), Jaskier just thinks she likes him more now that he’s human.

►Jaskier has different strengths during and post curse. While he was cursed, he had fur to increase his defense and warmth in cold climates, and fangs and claws that he could attack monsters with. He’s not a fighter by any means but he wasn’t useless. The first time Geralt gets attacked after the curse is lifted, Jaskier almost rushes in to help, forgetting that he’s squishy and vulnerable again. Roach is the one that keeps him from charging in. After the curse, though, he’s able to charm his way into dinner, a room, and a bath for him and Geralt in almost every inn they visit. Geralt misses his (meager) backup, but privately thinks that being able to bathe more often is a worthy trade-off. Jaskier honestly just luxuriates in warm water. →There was one incident where, while Jaskier was cursed, Geralt found himself surrounded by wargs and being overwhelmed. Y’all remember that scene in Beauty and the Beast where Belle ran from the castle and got hunted down by wolves and then the Beast comes out of nowhere, roaring and tossing wolves until they run?? Yeah, that’s this. Jaskier sees Geralt in trouble and doesn’t even think about trying to run away, he runs straight into the fray. He’s not broad like the Beast was, is actually quite lean, but he’s still cursed and a monster, he’s got strength and sharp claws and vicious fangs that even Geralt doesn’t have. He roars at the wargs, enough to frighten some of them away, and fights off the others. He does end up severely injured, though, and while Geralt heals quickly, Jaskier does not. Cue relationship building while they tend each other’s injuries.

►It takes Jaskier a while to re-accustom himself to playing the lute and singing. For so long all he could do was snap strings and warble like a dying dove, he has to practice for hours to get his fingers to cooperate like they used to, and to recover the range and air capacity he used to have. He sings a lot when they travel, which he claims helps pass the time, but whenever Geralt gets grumpy about it Jaskier also points out that a, it’s helping him work on his air supply and b, he went for decades without singing, Geralt, you can deal with his joy for a little while longer

►After the curse is broken, Jaskier realizes that though he was cursed at roughly 20, and that it’s been at least two decades if not three that he’s been cursed, he hasn’t aged much if any. This actually causes him to panic and practically climb Geralt in an attempt to run to Yennefer to check and see if he’s still cursed or not. Geralt calms him down (some), they get back to Yenn, and it turns out that the strength of the curse lingers a bit. Jaskier ages much, much slower now, and heals much, much quicker. Yenn offers to fix it for him but Jaskier declines- he’s going to take this second chance, thank you very much.