#you can see how the quality slowly decreases lmao

[glazedyeastring]

Ashes and Christmas (Pt. 1)

*cracks knuckles*

I suddenly got the urge to make a little Christmas comic with an oc of mine. Although I doubt I'll finish in time for Christmas so I'm gonna send the w.i.p, and probably the second part after Christmas Anyway, hope you enjoy :>

[letssofia3006]

Wip for a practice animation...made of pure hype✨✨✨

[realcube]

msby boys finding out their s/o is pregnant

navi | masterlist | taglist  

thank you to anon for this wholesome request 

content warning ♡ pregnant! reader, sexual references, swearing & fluff

characters ♡ sakusa, atsumu, bokuto & hinata

kiyoomi sakusa 

♡ he faltered

♡ there was half a minute of silence between the two of you; him just staring at your stomach while you gazed into his eyes

♡ he was almost certain that he misheard you, so he felt inclined to inquire, ‘huh?’ as indifferently as he could, though he wasn’t doing a good job of concealing the shocked expression on his face 

♡ ‘i said i’m pregnant, sweetie.’ you giggled, admiring the emotions he displayed on his face as it wasn’t a sight you got to see often

♡ sakusa continued to stare at you, eyes wide 

♡ though he knew what you meant, apart of him insisted that he was mishearing you 

♡ his wide-eyes were fixated on you, his lips slightly agape as he tried to process what you just said and what this meant for the both of you 

♡ the only emotion you could read of his face was shock. at first, you were sure that he was happy but he was just taking a while to accept it, but now that a few minutes had passed and he was still yet to say anything or even smile, you were starting to second guess yourself

♡ despite the fact sakusa had already agreed that he was on board with the idea of having a child many times before - in fact, there were nights where he’d admit that he can’t wait to start a family with you - but you still worried that perhaps he has now that had a change of heart

♡ that was until you noticed his eyes become unusually glossy and red, along with his cheeks adapting a somewhat red tint, ‘if this is a joke, (y/n), it’s not funny.’ his ordinary, monotone voice was now slightly shaky and low 

♡ ‘it’s not a joke, ‘iyoomi.’ you laughed, feeling your own throat go dry and your cheek flare up upon seeing how emotional sakusa had become

♡ before the tears spilled from your eyes, you felt sakusa’s arms slowly snake around your waist, place an elongated kiss on your forehead then rest his chin on your shoulder 

♡ he held you close enough that you could feel his rapid heartbeat thud against your chest and his wobbly breath tickle the back of your neck

♡ he stayed like that, silent, for a good few minutes 

♡ when he finally pulled away to admire your stomach, you noticed how his damp cheeks glistened in the light and you couldn’t help but smile

♡ although he wasn’t very vocal about how happy he was, his actions spoke a thousand words

♡ he’d insist in home-cooking all your food now because he didn’t want to risk you getting food poisoning 

♡ when he’d come home from practise, absolutely exhausted, the first thing he’d do when he gets home is  wash his hands then cut you some fruit 

♡ when he has free-time, he used to just watch TV but now he’s picked up a few hobbies of reading childcare books, tending to your every need/want and researching good baby names

♡ also, he’s so gentle with you - like, he was gentle with you before but this is a new extreme

♡ excluding the time he almost tackled you to the ground when you suggested atsumu as a baby name

♡ like he baby-proofs the house like a month into your pregnancy lmao 

kōtarō bokuto

♡ the corners of his lips slowly curl into a bright smile, ‘pregnant?’

♡ you cocked your head to the side slightly, then hummed, ‘yeah. pregnant.’

♡ ‘like..with a kid?’

♡ you snorted, playfully rolling your eyes, ‘i’d hope so.’

♡ ‘like..with my kid?’

♡ ‘our kid - but yes.’

♡ a while passed and he had yet to do anything besides stare at you in pure adoration so you prompted him by opening your arms 

♡ to which he immediately responded by throwing himself onto you, ‘I’m gonna be a dad?! like seriously?!’

♡ luckily you were sitting on your bed so you fell back onto that but you were still being smothered by his chest 

♡ ‘bo!’ you squealed and squirmed under his weight and tight grip, glad that he was as cheery as you had hoped but not appreciating being suffocated 

♡ he suddenly pulled away but kept his large hands glued to your shoulders, revealing the tears that were already streaming down his cheeks and dampened your shirt, ‘really?!’

♡ ‘yes, bokuto. i am 100% pregnant.’ you declared for the final time before bokuto cupped your face with his hands and pulled you in to a passionate kiss, not stopping until your lips were basically swollen

♡ he’s just so hyped during the first few days of your pregnancy and he’s just super duper ready to become a dad!

♡ like he’s already practising his dad jokes 

♡ but then you remind him that he’s gonna have to wait around 9 months before he can actually see his baby and his hair literally deflates 

♡ ugh how rude of you 

♡ can you not like...make it grow faster?? please??

♡ once you explain to him that’s not how babies work, he kinda accepts it and just focuses his attention on you

♡ he kinda does some research on babies/pregnancy but not prior, he just does a quick google search when he needs to 

♡ but the intention is definitely there bc he googles the most trivial of things like ‘what to make pregnegant ppl for breakfast?’

♡ ‘what do pragnant ppl need from the supermarket?’

♡ ‘can my pregenunt wife have peanut butter?’

♡ ‘how to spell preaignant’ 

atsumu miya 

♡ DEEP denial

♡ he thinks you are playing a prank on him bc you don’t ‘look pregnant’

♡ even when you show him your positive pregnancy test he’s like ‘and how much did that cost?’

♡ he deadass acts as if he wasn’t the one who’s been trying to get you pregnant and raving on about how much he wants a family with you for the last few months 

♡ but he just doesn’t want to believe you bc he know he’ll get way too happy for his own good and he’s afraid to be let down

♡ plus, it was one of those ‘a blessing of this magnitude couldn’t have happened to me - of all people - so this is probably either a cruel joke or a hallucination.’ moments 

♡ he’s just so far gone that after your eleventh attempt at trying to convince him that you’re pregnant for real, you just give up

♡ so y’all just go around your business somewhat normally - except atsumu was more skittery - until your baby bump started to become more prominent

♡ one day, he came back from practise, noticed your bump and pulled you into the most passionate, heartfelt kiss before placing a gentle kiss upon your stomach, a buoyant grin gracing his features

♡ though he doesn’t say much since he is at a loss for words, he mutters a few sweet nothings into your ear as he carries you to the bedroom

♡ for a joke, he pretends to be gutted if you’re libido production decrease but really, he couldn’t care less

♡ but if it increases tho- 

♡ expect him to take full advantage of that 

♡ also, if he didn’t already treat you like his goddess, he does now 

♡ work has moved down his list of priorities and you + his baby are now at number one 

♡ usually he keeps his phone on silent/stuffs it into his bag while he is practising but now he insists on keeping it on full volume, out on the bench, just in case you call him for an emergency 

♡ same goes for texts; he will literally stop mid-set to rush over to his phone if he hears it vibrate 

♡ bokuto thinks it’s sweet but the rest of them get pretty annoyed of his antics quite quickly but whenever they try to call him out on it, he’s like ‘is your wife 6 months pregnant? no! i didn’t think so. i should be on paternity leave right now so be glad i’m blessing you with my presence.’

shōyō hinata

♡ he cannot stop thanking you

♡ as if you’re doing him a favour, which - depending on how you view it - you are

♡ he’s literally on his knees with his hands clasped together, tears of joy streaming down his face as he looks up at you in pure adoration, ‘thank you, (y/n)!’

♡ you tilted your head to the side and stared at him with a perplexed expression, ‘you’re welcome?’

♡ it’s a while before he moves from that position but when he does, it’s only so he can press his ear against your stomach to see if he can hear the baby 

♡ ‘shō, i don’t think it’s body has even formed ye--’

♡ ‘shh! it’s speaking to me.’ he chuckled then proceeded to squeeze his eyes shut, intensely listening to whatever the baby had to say 

♡ you quirked a brow, waiting for him to finish and once he did, he sprung to his feet and threw his arms over your shoulders to pull you in for a hug - in which he had to stop himself from squeezing you too tightly in fear of hurting you, as if pregnancy meant that your bones were now made of glass

♡ he’s just so happy that you agreed to bear his children 🙏

♡ also, seeing how excited you were to tell him about your pregnancy really prompted him to step up his husband-game 

♡ from now on, he loads the dishwasher, does both of your laundry, cleans the house on his own and cooks most of the food 

♡ he acts as if being pregnant means you are no longer able to do basic tasks but his real motive behind doing these things was not only to take the pressure off of you but to also prepare himself for father life 👍

♡ also, to prepare him for shopping for his kids’ clothes, he goes out and buys you maternity wear 

♡ he does this like...3 weeks into your pregnancy though so the clothes just sit and catch dust until a few months later when you actually need them 

♡ and although he is a bit of a pain to go stroller/pram shopping with (he just says buy whichever one goes the fastest), you let him take the reins when it came to buying/preparing the baby’s room and it came out beautiful!

♡ like the cradle was good quality and firm, the rug wouldn’t irritate the baby’s skin, the walls were painted expertly and the plushies/toys he picked out - unbeknownst to you at the time - kept the baby entertained for ages

♡ oh and no matter what day/week/month you are in of pregnancy, he will always look at you and your bump with the same amazement and gratitude as he did the first time you told him

[purplesurveys]

725

Your name? Robyn. Age? Just turned 22. Ugh, I’ve finally reached the point where future ages – other than 30/40/50 etc – won’t be much of a milestone anymore. I can hear Monica Geller tell me, “welcome to the real world, it sucks.” Gender? Identify as female. Ethnic background? I usually just say Filipino to make it easier but technically I’m mostly Tagalog with a bit of Mangyan and Ilokano and I think Bulakeño? in me. What do you like the most about your ethnic background? It’s hard to find anything to be proud of from being Filipino sksksk I like our cuisine I guess? Especially the seafood?

The least? It’s not something I dislike directly about our own background, because what I like the least is the hundreds of years of colonization by four different nations that led to the near-complete wipeout of our native culture and the severe colonial effects that followed. The reason I find it so hard to rack my brain for stuff about our ‘ethnic background’ is because everything about it has already been penetrated by Spanish, English, Japanese, or American influence, even down to how well I can speak English right now. It’s almost impossible to look for something that’s ours. Who is your favorite golf player? I’ve never liked watching golf. Whats your favorite kind of gold? (White, Yellow, Rose, Traditional) Rose gold looks pretty. Would you rather wear turquoise pants or purple? Highkey would not wear either of these but if it came down to it, purple. Would you ever go on a jungle safari? I kind of already did. It was a lot of fun and I would rather keep going to safaris if I wanted to see wild animals as it’s a much lesser evil than zoos. If you saw a UFO what would you do? Hope my fingers are quick enough and immediately take a video. What color is your mailbox? We don’t have one. Mailmen just place it by the handle of our screen door. Are you taller than your Mom? No, I’m the smallest one in the family. Who is your meanest friend? I never really counted Patrice as a friend but she’s been the least nice acquaintance I remember having. Her attitude is actually the reason I hadn’t seen her as a friend, so that said I wouldn’t really be befriending anyone who I thought isn’t very nice. Have you ever thought about suicide? Yeah, well I’m not exactly the most mentally well person durrrr. I don’t think of it as often as I used to, but it’ll cross my mind more or less once a month. Have you ever broken a pinata? I’ve never had that experience before actually. I’ve only seen it in cartoons. Who loves Orange Soda? I don’t like soda, period. Where did you go the last time you used public transportation? I dunno if it counts because the jeep just goes around the campus hahaha but I took a jeep coming from CAL going to CMC, my home college. My dad accidentally drove the car I was gonna use that day so I had to book a Grab (our local Uber; also I can’t do public transpo for long distances hence the private car, heh) going to school, and then the campus jeeps to go from one class to another. If you were to start a band what would you name it? Never hire me to name stuff. Would you rather spend a year in the abyss or outer space? Outer space. It’s where I’ve always wanted to go anyway. I fear for my sanity if I wind up in the abyss. Do you know someone who has shot off a part of their own body? No but I know someone who had been shot (or stabbed? I can’t remember but he was attacked); it was my Kuya’s close friend. What TV shows stick out from your childhood? Mr. Bean, Pokemon, SpongeBob, Jimmy Neutron, Drake and Josh, The Suite Life of Zack and Cody, That’s so Raven, to name a few. What is/was for dinner tonight? No idea yet. My dad usually whips something up at the last minute but it always turns out so so good. What’s really the best cure for a hangover? FRIED CHICKEN and I will die on this hill. Do you eat the stems of broccoli? Oooh I don’t think that’s been served to me before actually. I’m not opposed to trying them though cause broccoli’s my favorite vegetable. How many cavities do you have? I had a couple before but they’ve since been fixed at the dentist. Have you ever given money to a bum? Yes I always give them money ranging from ₱10 to ₱20, and biscuits if I have some in my bag, if they knock on my window. If you found 100 dollars on the floor of a church what would ya do with it? If I found it in a church I’d absolutely run the fuck away with the money lmao. Is your head a fun place to be in? I’m a bit of a workaholic and am always thinking about the next thing to accomplish, so tbh I imagine it looking like Spongebob’s brain HAHAHAHA as in exactly this shot

What is your favorite word? Poignant to me sounds and looks the way it means, which is so satisfying. Why is going to poop such a social taboo? We covered a bit of this in my anthropology class last semester and our prof shared a theory that says our body is in and of itself clean but once substances exit the body they’re seen as impure and already dirty - which is why we’ll have no problem talking about the circulatory system but many tend to faint if they cut their finger too much and see blood leaking out of them. Same explanation goes with poop, saliva, sweat, etc. I’m too lazy to check my notes if every bit of this is accurate, but the impure/dirty is the one I remember to be correct. Who is your worst enemy? Don’t really like the idea of enemies per se but after Marielle betrayed my trust twice I vowed to never speak with her again, and I never have. When was the last time you passed gas? I don’t like farting. If I feel one coming I suppress it on purpose. Do you eat raw hot dogs? No, that sounds so nasty. Do you ever speak out loud what you should be typing? Eh, sometimes and only if I’m by myself. It’s not a habit though. Do you own a squirt gun? We call them a water gun here but it used to be one of my favorite toys from childhood. I don’t own one anymore as I largely don’t need them. Do you like the Subway $5 footlong? I don’t really eat Subway. What is the last thing you ate with Marshmallow in it? Hate marshmallows. I always remove it if it had been added to the food I’m eating. Would you rather live in a shack on the beach or a mansion in Ohio? I love you beach, but I’m taking the damn mansion lol. Do you believe that zombies could really invade the Earth? I don’t think zombies could ever surface naturally but at some point in the distant future, when technology and human knowledge advance enough and if someone was ambitious enough to use such knowledge for the worse, I feel like some chemical or substance causing someone to become a zombie could be made. Idk, people have come up with crazy shit from science that were initially thought to be impossible so for me I’m not ruling out zombies or at least a milder version of them haha. If you were to buy a boat what would you name it? Margo, as an homage to Margo Martindale’s role from BoJack Horseman. Who is your internet provider? PLDT. What has the tv show two and a half men taught you? Nothing, because I’ve never watched an episode. What’s something you’re not supposed to be doing right now? Not thinking about my unfinished thesis. I should definitely be thinking about it right now lol. What’s hotter topless or pantless? A bit TMI considering the time ksksks but topless for me. What would you do if you found a four leaf clover? I don’t know what that’s supposed to mean (but I wanna say it means good luck?) so maybe I’ll just take a photo of it heh. Miami Dolphins or NY Jets? I don’t even know what sport these teams belong to. What is your favorite kind of instant popcorn? I don’t like popcorn, so it’s a pass for me. Do you pay attention to the expiration dates on food? Yeah I check on them quite often since I once had a terrible experience drinking spoiled milk; but I’ve also been told by my dad that the expiration dates don’t necessarily mean spoilage and molds and all that nasty crap, and that the date just means by when the product’s quality will slowly start to decrease, like if chips start to get tougher to chew or if a chocolate bar becomes less sweet. It’s a source of relief, but I’m still paranoid about expiration dates overall. What ringtone is on your phone? Just the ones Apple provides. What odd thing do you wish you were doing right now? Driving in circles around the village just to enjoy the outside world :( Are you a smoker? Socially. How do you feel about not being able to smoke in a lot of bars? I don’t mind it. I’m not desperate to smoke ever.

[shadowtearling]

hey! been thinking about poetry recently and 1) would you ever post or publish any and 2) what do you think of structural (more "traditional" poetry i guess) verse more freeform poetry or even something like rupi kaur? is there any style you prefer to read/write? this is always a discussion that's super interesting to me like no shade either way, i just think the evolution of & the way we think about poetry is fascinating!

hell yeah i love talking about poetry!!!!

i have posted some here but i’m not proud of those pieces???? lmao i’m trying to figure out what’s the best way to share with y’all esp since my work is on the longer side. and because i love playing with formatting, and the moment i try to share, tumblr eats all of it away and parts of the meanings i was trying to generate have gone. i would love to share mostly bc i would like feedback to see what people are responding to!! if you want to see/read them, they’re here but they are vastly changed since i posted (i love the process of revising poetry it’s even better than writing imo) 

i think there’s value in all forms of poetry! when i first started writing (and for a long time), i only ever wrote in free verse because i was scared of structure and believed that my work’s quality would decrease for the sake of maintaining form. i was wrong! i just had to look and try harder to create pieces i would be proud of! i think what’s really fun is trying to think of ways in which form would enhance content! for example, i struggled for a long time with writing a sestina. but in understanding how it worked (the cyclical nature, very repetitive), i found content that would be aided by the form: grief. i wrote about the stages of grief in the sestina and the way the different stages get muddled together by the end is exactly how going through grief feels like! it was such a fun experience for me. i also think, free verse CAN be difficult to tackle. i like being mindful about punctuation and format. what would a strikethrough do that erasing it completely would not? what do those indentations do? free verse can be hard if you don’t know where to go with it. 

i’ve shared opinions of rupi kaur’s poetry (i’m not the biggest fan) HOWEVER, i do still think there’s value in it even if it wasn’t for me. that brand of poetry feels to me severely unpolished (because poetry is not just about the words we say but also how we say it and how we present them on the page!!) kaur, specifically, has potential to grow as a poet but not if she continues to bank on only one-word line, surface-level poetry. 

reading-wise, i’m ready to try anything! i tire easily of the contemporary poetry popular on here but i’m always open to having my mind changed. i’m trying to slowly read the romantics. honestly im just a sucker for beautiful words (even if i don’t understand them all the time)

[insanetwocubes]

Sticky sticky.

Dude, our first year of investing is gonna be so good. We're gonna speedrun these bills, speed run the savings.

I know we can do it cuz I'm working my ass off, I got two jobs, I got the fake money conversion figured out. So it's lyke having two pillows lol

I really do regret not investing sooner, but now we know.

I guess eventually we need to have the spread sheets catch up but honestly, they are kinda depressing af right now lmao.

I'm focussing on survival right now lmao. We can update them when we're ready to move back to one job lmfao.

But we are more than surviving so. Even if it's for a week or so. Sometimes that's enough.

Plus Flare is switching out in april. She lyke. Idk. Is better at not hating work? Lmao.

Yeah so at first we're gonna lyke invest in one. And obviously as prices go up, it automatically gets reinvested into the same one.

But we're also working our ass off so. We also invest in the next one out of a list. Or the same one. I really don't see why we would invest in ones that are less than the best. Unless we just don't have money for it.

But yeah eventually I want to move off the retail job obviously. Cuz i think... well, depending on lyke

Wait... if investments are sticky and we will only have so much into savings. Do we lyke... sell.... it?

Cuz cars go for 30k at least. And at that point, we would have to decrease the income...

Hm. But I think. Yeah, because it would go back the savings amount. Unless we're living off it.

Cuz do we prioritize working less or a new car? I think a new car because this car is dying. So.

Lyke otherwise I wouldn't care. So I guess if we could lyke. Yeah cuz lyke okay. In a timeline, right. The more labor intensive comes first.

And plus we'll still have some money chugging for us.

So. Yeah. It's gonna be the car first. Because we still have a job. And even though we have to work more, we will still have investments.

And then we're good, I think.

Good to do whatever the fuck we want.

I mean obviously, we have this whole list, right. So we're still saving up and shit.

What is it, a 3%?

The invested savings will get us... not much, honestly lmao. But it's fine.

Neither do the 30k.

But the difference is between having a good car and not lmao. Which is lyke cutting a world of expenses down.

I mean. The investing is shit income, we know this. The point of it is lyke a jumping step from labor income to passive income. We all know it was gonna be shit.

It's important because of the passivity of it. Because time is really important.

Anyway. I promise you, it's gonna be good. We just keep up living in squalor lmao. No apartment for me.

Maybe later, but not now.

It's fine. We'll make it.

We were never supposed to even go up in the first place lmao. So when you think about it this way, having even a foot in, means the world.

Just gotta work our ass off now. Finish with the bills so they ain't on our ass.

And everything extra goes to our savings.

I mean I know I hate working and shit.

Honestly just having a new car will make things 100% easier.

Maybe I will keep the retail job. Just so I can lyke keep a schedule and not fucking die of depression. And then not work any extra hours. Not care about lyke how I come off and whatever. Because all I need is to show up.

Hm. Man.

Yeah, we're on the up and up.

Again :D cuz of course we are.

Just a little more.

Then we get to lyke. Start permanently increasing out time. So here's the thing, right. You'll never get anywhere if you don't manage your expenses. Right now our biggest expesses are mental problems and car problems. After that's dealt with, I can basically lyke grow income-

Oh and rent. Hm. I guess it would be best to deal with rent.

Hm.

That would be smart actually. Followed by a garden that would be real nice actually. And a real kitchen... mmm...

Okay lol anyway. Car is the most immediate problem right now so we're addressing that first.

Right so. All of that reduction of costs is gonna go into lyke our future and whatever.

Until then it's fine to be working, I guess.

I mean, I know other lyke opportunities are gonna come up and whatever.

And our lyke quality of life is gonna be increasing all the while. And the amount of work is gonna slowly decrease anyway.

*Yawn* yeah.

Investing is just gonna loop to more time which is gonna go into lyke the lyke whatever I want to do. Streaming or whatever. Which is the real passive income that will have me for life from then on.

Idk when that's gonna be, though.

Oh well. I just need to increase time so I could lyke. Be happy. And get lyke an up on savungs so we can buy stuff that makes me happy lmfao.

~Four

[rather-impertinent]

Do Not Forget It

A/N: for my fave @arlome "you're holding back" (I forgot what number it is lmao) 💓 enjoy friends! xo

~~~~~~~~~~~~

A stone plops with speed into the water, disturbing the reflection of the moonlight, followed by another and then another and another. The bowler is a one Dr. Dwight Enys, who has abandoned his role as host in search of a quiet place to clear his thoughts. The water had always been a comfort to him, and the small deck and pond at the back of Killewarren, near the small, private garden was his favourite feature of the impressive estate. He hurls pebble after pebble, stone after stone, rock after rock into the poor, defenceless stream. He is so preoccupied by his thoughts that his wife's hand on his shoulder nearly ceases the function of his heart.

He stumbles several feet backwards and drops the small handful of pebbles he had been holding. "Caroline!" he exclaims, clutching his chest.

"Dr. Enys," she greets, giggling at him. I see you have still not mastered the art of skipping rocks," she teases. "Fear not, I shall teach you again on Sunday." She pulls her husband close to her and kisses him fervently before pulling away, feeling somewhat affronted. "You're holding back," she observes with a pouting face.

With some effort he shakes his head. "I'm not," he lies, his tone light. He has always been a terrible liar, a man of such upright moral values could not possibly be expected to be skilled in the art of deceit.

"Dwight," she says, offering her best encouraging smile. "Is something the matter? You can tell me," she takes his hands in her own, "We promised long ago not to keep anything from each other."

He smiles slightly. "That we did," he admits before sighing heavily. "I- I just wonder if such occasions," he motions to the house behind them, "are necessary, and so often."

She laughs dismissively, unaware of the ulterior motive behind his comment. "Oh, Dwight, I know you're no lover of society but I'm afraid such parties are indeed necessary for preserving our good name!"

Her comment stings him for some reason. "Does not my work do that?" he counters defensively.

Caroline releases her grip on his hands and rocks back and forth on her heels impatiently. "Of course it does - but in a different way! We have discussed this, Dwight! Like it or not, you are master of Killewarren, and you must take heed of the responsibilities of such a role," she has not noticed that he has blushed furiously at this, "Besides, it is an opportunity to spend more time together."

An owl hoots in the distance. "We've scarce exchanged two words all evening," he points out flatly.

Flustered by his logic, she hopes to win him over by a playfully taunt. "I'm afraid my dance card has been full. Such is the hardship of having a rich, beautiful wife! Perhaps I can fit in a dance with my favourite doctor some time later this evening." She smiles cheekily at him.

He tries to smile but finds it cannot reach his eyes. "I think I shall go to bed. I find I am feeling somewhat ill." He nods curtly at her and approaches the house.

That nod, Caroline reflects, is akin to one he had given her long ago, when she had teased him about the lives of his patients. The thought of such informality tightens in her chest and she observes him as he is about to enter the house. "Dwight! Wait!" He does not hear her, or perhaps ignores her deliberately, and slams the large oak door behind him.

Caroline returns to the party and Dwight's absence is now obvious to her. She accepts a dance with George Warleggan but is so distracted it is a miracle the man has any toes left by the end of the brief encounter. She excuses herself brusquely and approaches the table to fetch another glass of port, her third in only fifteen minutes since reemerging from outside.

Two men stand a few metres to her right, she does not recognise them but her ears prick at the recognition of their conversation topic.

"Is Dr. Enys truly a gentleman then, do you think?" the older man asks his younger friend.

The younger man smoothes his richly embroidered waistcoat as he considers his answer. "Supposedly," he scoffs. "But a man with such a queer sympathy for the poor could never truly be a gentleman. I have heard he wishes for there to be no divide between the likes of us and the vulgars. Have you ever heard anything so ridiculous?"

The two men laugh gruffly, which sends a wave of anger coursing through Caroline's body. "Indeed I have not. It is one thing to have sympathy with the vulgars but it is another to dress like one!" the older man continues in disgust, and Caroline's face grows redder. "The man's attire must be fifteen years out of fashion! One would expect to see a better dressed master of Killewarren, presuming his primary motive was the impressive fortune. Why, Ray Penvenen would turn in his grave to think of such an improper upstart inheriting his house and niece. Lord knows why Enys was so offended when you told him so!"

So, that is what is wrong with Dwight. She gulps her glass of port in one smooth motion, earning her several raised eyebrows, but she cares not. Before propriety has the chance to influence her decision she is approaching the two men; her features contorted in fury, her knuckles clenched with such force they are as white as the moon that shines in the sky.

Before she can open her mouth to launch an explosive tirade in defense of her husband, she is enveloped in a tight hug. "My dear, it is so good to see you!" exclaims Elizabeth Warleggan, elegantly turning her away from the two gentlemen and back towards the table of port. "My dear, you forget yourself," she warns warmly in a hushed tone. "I overheard their conversation, pray do not take it to heart. You know we all think highly of Dwight." She smiles gently at Caroline, whose temper is decreasing by the second. "Where is he?"

Caroline sighs and hesitates slightly. "He is upstairs, I believe. He has taken ill, would you believe it? Such irony!" she laughs nervously.

Elizabeth knowingly places a gentle pat on her bicep. "Go to him," she encourages quietly. "I shall see that things run smoothly here in your absence. It has been a while since George and I entertained, I find I am rather enjoying myself," she smiles brightly.

Caroline squeezes her hands lovingly in thanks and excuses herself; taking care not to sprint out of the room.

As she comes face to face with the door of their bedroom, nerves swim in her stomach. She honestly considers knocking before realising how utterly ridiculous that would be. She slowly turns the doorknob and peels the door open, closing it gently behind her. Dwight is sitting on the edge of the bed, his boots removed, staring blankly into space as he often does when he is upset; he has not acknowledged her presence.

Caroline gulps slightly before slowly edging near him. "My love?" she says shyly. Her voice brings him out of his daze and he swiftly stands up and begins untying his neckcloth. He simply nods at her again.

That second nod pricks her eyes, and she places her hands over his to cease his movements. She guides his chin with her hand so that she may look at him; his eyes are sad, like that of a small child or puppy. Her arms wrap tightly around his body. "Why did you not tell me what those horrible, impertinent scoundrels said?" she breathes against him, new anger surging through her veins at the mention of the two men downstairs, who continue to drink fine port at her expense! Bone shall have to escort them out.

Dwight's arms lightly slink around her waist and she smiles. "I did not wish to bother you with such things," he excuses lightly, his lie once again obvious to her ears.

She pushes away from him, severing their embrace. "For God's sake, Dwight!" she yells, "I am your wife! You can talk to me about anything! You know that! Why did you not tell me?"

He stiffens in response to her anger. "I did not wish to bother you," he grumbles stubbornly.

"If you do not tell me the truth this instant then I swear I shall sleep in the pink room for the remainder of our marriage! What is the matter?"

He runs an impatient hand through his styled hair. "I do not wish to embarrass you! I don't want you to feel ashamed of me!" he shouts, finally admitting the truth at last.

Caroline gasps quietly. Her comments earlier in the evening seemed to have a profound effect on him and now she sees why. She averts her eyes in shame at having fed his insecurities with her words. She sighs loudly. "Dwight, I could never feel ashamed of you," she tells him. "Your transition to master of Killewarren has been nothing short of extraordinary. Especially after your- ordeal- in France. I must doubt that there is another heiress alive who feels more pride for her husband."

He smiles shyly before his anxiety floods him again. "But- but everyone downstairs is so well-bred and proper and- gentlemanly. They thrive in such environments as this whereas I am tongue tied and foolish. I cannot help but feel they are somewhat right in suggesting I was not a suitable match for you."

"I did not marry you for your fine blue eyes nor your quality of neckcloth, Dr. Enys," she teases in attempt to calm the tightness in her chest at his implication. "Truly," she begins sincerely, nervously playing with the lace on her sleeve to distract from her vulnerability. "That all may well be true; they may have fortunes of their own and status. But since the day you chided me for my over indulgence of Horace's whims, I'm afraid there could be no other man for me but you. No man had ever stood up to me before. You challenged my every word, my selfish actions, my naive mind. You have made me who I am. Do you think I would be content to sit at home by the fire waiting for the return of any man from France?" she quickly wipes away a tear that threatens to fall. "I can assure you I would not. Perhaps I do not show it often enough, but I am truly proud to be married to such a kind, generous, intelligent, penniless country doctor!" She is both laughing and crying.

Dwight closes the distance between them with almost impossible haste and crashes his lips against hers with such passion she fears it will drain all of the air from her lungs. "I love you," he murmurs sincerely against her lips as they break apart, his brows furrowed in emotion as he considers how truly fortunate he is to have married such a wonderful, understanding woman.

She kisses him again. "I love you," she echoes ardently. She presses her index finger into his chest. "And do not forget it."

"I will not," he promises quietly, quickly kissing her again before offering his arm. "I believe you promised your favourite doctor a dance. Unless, of course, you are referring to Dr. Choake, in which case I believe is grounds for divorce!"

They laugh heartily but she does not take his arm as he expected, instead she resumes the untying of his forgotten neckcloth. "I have a fancy for a different sort of dance, one where I may prove to you just how proud I truly am," she purrs impudently.

Without any sort of resistance, he succumbs to her seduction, ripping the neckcloth from it's position and casting it carelessly onto the floor. Caroline fumbles desperately with the buttons of his waistcoat as he gently suckles her earlobe. A button slips off his vest and bounces off the floor, causing the doctor to chuckle brazenly into her ear. Her patience quite spent, she hoists the item over his head and dispenses it inattentively behind them, where it lays abandoned with the orphaned button, followed soon after by Dwight's shirt.

Dissatisfied with the uneven state of undress, he twirls her around, running his fingers through the tied lace of her gown, loosening it up. She grasps his sunny hair as he peppers avid, hot kisses along the column of her slender neck, eliciting delightful moans from his wife's parted lips. He skilfully removes her garments with the precision of a surgeons hand. He was - at present - pleasantly at peace with being considered ungentlemanly, and his wife could most assuredly not accuse him of holding back now.

[poipoi1912]

There are still many people around who talk about SVU. My blog is 80% Barba, Sonny & Barisi, I reblog from you&other popular people all the time PLUS create my own stuff, but it's hard to get a reblog (not to mention a(n) (re-)add...lmao). OK, maybe my blog just sucks, but one of my mutuals makes amazing Barisi&SVU fanart and gets 15 notes max. The content is right here, but everyone keeps 2 their own old clique. Why don't we support each other more? Sorry, this fandom frustrates me sometimes.

I genuinely think the show itself is the problem. For the past couple of seasons, I used to click on the Sonny tag or the Barisi tag and I’d like/reblog everything I saw and I’d get excited and everything was great and I couldn’t wait to go through my dash! This season, I’m like “….eh”. My excitement is almost totally gone. I think a lot of people feel that way (at least going by the number of people who no longer post about SVU or who now have multifandom blogs like me lol).

Speaking for myself, you’ll find that I mostly reblog actual gifs of Sonny or Barba from the new episodes, or shitposts about how far the show has fallen. Even my own meta posts are shorter (and a struggle to write, except for my speculation roundups, which I really enjoy, because they allow me to hear your thoughts). I lack the energy to even make an effort to participate more. I do feel terrible, but my main mood these days is “....eh.”

The fact is, the lack of quality and character development this season is slowly but surely killing my interest. I almost reblog more Lucifer than SVU, at this point, and I’ve followed a dozen Lucifer/Deckerstar blogs just so I can have something I enjoy on my dash. Tumblr-wise, SVU content is, in my view, decreasing. Not in quality, of course, because I do agree that people still create wonderful stuff, but in quantity. Or in frequency. We used to get tons of gif sets and meta after each episode, and we’d discuss each ep for days at a time, but this season there’s not much to gif or talk about.

I do see an uptick in Sonny/Reader or Barba/Reader stories and/or Imagines. In fact, I feel that’s the majority of SVU fic right now, at least on tumblr. Unfortunately, I’ve never really gotten into those, not in any fandom, so I’m just like “You do you guys! I’m glad y’all are enjoying yourselves!

As for cliques, I’ll speak for myself. As anyone here will tell you, I don’t really talk to people via messaging (hi, guys who sent me stuff 6 months ago and I still haven’t replied!) or e-mail etc, because I’m a terrible person and also I am scared of emotional intimacy, so I consider myself a Lone Dick Wolf here. I just use my posts and my tags to communicate with you all (and my asks, when I remember to answer them). I do follow and love some Barisi OGs, if you will, lol, but I don’t think I limit my reblogs just to them (omg do I?). Truth be told, I do occasionally reblog “popular” old school Barisi posts, but that’s because the show hasn’t given us anything new since the S17 finale. And because there’s a sense of nostalgia in reblogging that same Barisi gif set that has 800 notes :’)

Like, 15 notes for a new SVU/Sonny/Barba/Barisi post (unless it’s a gif set) sounds about right, know what I’m saying? In my view, it’s not about us not supporting each other, it’s about (some of) us finding it hard to care these days :(

i say this as i’m working on a ~40K barisi fic lmao i’m a masochist

in my defense it’s a canon AU because canon is no longer interesting or inspiring

also dammit i still love sonny and barba and i always will

Lastly, no one’s blog sucks, anon! We’re all here to have fun! If only the show would let us. I don’t know if you were active last season or the one before that, but I fear you might be experiencing the side-effects of a fandom on the decline. If you’re just starting to participate, and you’re all excited, and you’re making great posts, and you’re not getting the response you deserve, I’m sure you must feel frustrated. The thing is, SVU content may be there, and it may be great, but how many people are still actively interested? 15 lol

unless it’s gifs of barba’s ties and sonny’s tight pants which rightfully get hundreds of notes, because quality schmality, we all have eyes :’)

Again, it all comes down to the show, for me. I can’t pretend I’m still excited, I can’t act like I’m still enjoying it when I literally have to force myself to watch the new episodes. I click on the tags and I have little inclination to reblog anything that isn’t Sonny’s face. It’s sad, but it is what it is. I still write Barisi, because it’s a helpful and healthy creative outlet for me and my real life woes, and I’m attached to these characters, and I’m super-attached to you guys, but I can’t say I’m surprised to see fewer posts and fewer notes for SVU-related content.

I mean, after a boring mess like this week’s episode, who has the energy to reblog anything about it? me lol, but you know what i mean

Thank you for this ask, anon, and I hope my point was clear. If you’re feeling left out, it’s not because your blog sucks (

Disclaimer: I don’t speak for everyone, of course. Those of you who are still super-excited about SVU, y’all are awesome! I’m happy for you, and I envy you. I’m sure you’re out there having fun and excitedly chatting about the show. Don’t let my ramblings sour your enjoyment