#zero social skills dumbahh

[mielkexnn-miraculous]

F. Fathom (aka Argos) Headcanons :)

Haha he’s so stupid (affectionate). I honestly think of him as a pathetic little kitten sitting his butt out on the sidewalk in the middle of the pouring rain that is actively being picked up by Adrien and wrung in a towel and tossed a saucer of boiling hot milk when it comes to his social skills. Ok, dumbass speedrun 3, 2, 1, go!!

He likes oranges but not really the color orange.

Also, not a fanatic but he thinks sports cars look cool.

A naturally good swimmer. When around other people, he’ll often dive under the surface and swim around to where he wants to go that way to avoid disturbing anyone.

His kind of humor is watching Jaws for a night time pool party and diving under the water to pinch people’s ankles.

Honestly a big softie for his mother and the sweet blonde women in his life generally. Yes, this includes Rose.

He bites the middle of his lip and scowls when thinking.

He has drawn blood previously; now has a small linear scar.

Looking for it is one of the only ways to tell him and Adrien apart appearance-wise.

He has severe rbf that Adrien somehow avoided.

Really good at drifting. No one has yet unlocked his Backstory on this topic.

Talks rlly formally w/ his hands behind his back; will cuss you out tho.

Too Tired For This.

He gifts people w/ books/coffee when they meet up sometimes.

Rlly likes greco-roman mythology and astronomy.

“an orange warms the stomach.”

Likes classic/heavy rock + hyperpop. He gets his like for Jagged Stone from his mother.

He’s English, Italian, and American.

A committed polyglot by hobby.

English, French, Italian, Spanish, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Greek, Latin, and German. Don’t ask how.

He watches k-dramas on the living room tv whilst eating chips and calling the characters cusses and cliche/cringy in Korean like that one meme of Leonardo DiCaprio pointing from his seat with a glass in his hand though, so there’s that.

No Shame.

Nearly aroace but not quite. He made an exception for Kagami :).

Also retconning the way they got together in canon bc that was fast and kinda weird idk. Let’s just say they take a lot more time than that talking at Rich Events ok.

He straightens/styles his hair every morning.

He likes ferrets.

He wakes up at nearly 5a every morning/early bird.

Theater kid trash.

Knows how to play basic guitar.

He takes like 1 college class every six months.

Still graduating in 4 years somehow.

Burnout hit him hard though. Now, he can only rlly ever focus on things if they genuinely interest him.

Unhinged. But, like, slightly (12%).

He likes crosswords and word games and stuff.

He’s got a Vibe Check system for talking to people. Don’t pass the Vibe Check? Bye.

So far, only a good nine people have ever really passed the Vibe Check—Adrien, Kagami, Marinette, Luka, Juleka, Rose, Alix, Nathanaël, and (strangely enough) Chloé.

(I guess she’s just persistent like that, idk, but he lets her hang around.)(She’s still an annoying lil whiny brat though.)

Auto Lila DNI. He can’t stand her tbh.

Don’t try to say they’re anything alike. At least he thinks of someone other than himself from time to time. Or has a personality other than being a nasty snake.

Expert gambler.

Firm believer that cream soda is to die for and has a designated spot in the fridge. Nerd.

He started eating a scoop of orange icecream covered in three scoops of mint to keep people *coughcoughchloécoughcough* from stealing it. He now eats it and enjoys it unironically.

He has tyramine sensitivity :(

He has outbursts similar to Adrien. Like Adrien, he too learned it from his father.

This guy is literally the best wingman.

(When he wants to be, that is.)

He does everything with such sleight of hand to make sure his ships sail.

Felix is the resident babygirl. Everyone calls him that, but if anyone new tries to he’ll slit their throat ok.

He’s incredibly good with young children; no one knows how or why he attained the knowledge he has.

Then they hit the age of three and he’s trying to teach them tax evasion. No.

Zero genuine social skills. He has them when he’s being fake and then he tries to do it for real and they go poof.

He’s just that good at magic huh.

Also has a deeply engrained fear of trusting people with knowledge of his interests thanks to trauma from his broken relationship with his father :)

You just have to understand that this man is a pathetic, sopping-wet-cat of a man. That’s, like, the message here.

Ok bye.