talkwith-kvrthvmmel

[talkwith-kvrthvmmel]

How did you feel when Blaine cheated on you? Be honest

So nice to see my personal affairs with @talkwithblaine are the gossip of the town, years later. Is the feeling of being cheated on a different feeling for every one who experiences it? I would think the feeling of questioning everything you did before to the lead up of what you're doing in present time isn't exactly top tier emotion. Always second guessing, because there'll always be a pit in your stomach when you see them looking at their phone or coming home late. You never forget how it feels to have your heart ripped out through your stomach and crushed, as air becomes thick in your lungs and you wonder if you should even bother to keep breathing. Trust needs to be rebuilt, and it's a work in progress. It's in the past, we're moving forward together. It's all one can do when you find yourself still in love with the person who hurt you. But one can't avoid hurt, especially in relationships. And expecting teenagers to think and rationalize the world like adults just because they're in a relationship is a little silly, and clearly we're working on bettering ourselves. If Blaine preferred rat faced men or big lipped guys who dye their hair with lemon juice (how?), we wouldn't be together now. You grow. You learn. You make the decisions and choices of your life, not let others opinions dictate your happiness ~

[talkwith-kvrthvmmel]

I would suggest anywhere cooler in this climate. Perhaps the exaggerated choice of skiing in the Alps? And take your best friend with you, so he can also experience the Alps.

On a more serious note, maybe somewhere with a beach. Florida? California? Although looking up some more private beaches for rent for a few days might be less stressful than being around loud crowds also escaping the summer heat.

I've been back in NYC for a hot minute and your girl is already wanting to go on another vacation. Anyone have a place they've been dying to go? I need ideas.

[talkwith-kvrthvmmel]

[talkwith-kvrthvmmel]

Kurt: Why do I feel like these TMI questions are coming from Timon himself?

Kurt: Can't even be sly or subtle about it.

Kurt: Also, spaghetti tonight? I'm at the bread store on my way home.

[talkwith-kvrthvmmel]

Me in jail: so are you guys familiar with the Cell Block Tango

[talkwith-kvrthvmmel]

And there it was. Validation that he wasn't the total asshole in his attempt to explain how his brain tried to poke and prod at silly circumstances, even if they were as ridiculous as this was. Whatever weird tension he was holding in his own body easily snapped as Blaine squeezed back then shifted closer. Kurt feeling the body heat between layers of clothes which brought comfort. Safety. The ability to relax another fraction, the wall coming down just a little more. Turning his body to better face Blaine.

"Yeah, we're okay. At least I would hope we're okay. I'm really sorry for starting this ridiculous fight in the first place. I don't know why I do it and why it always leads to getting defensive." Exhaling as he leans against the back of the sofa, still holding onto Blaine's hand to keep the contact so there wouldn't be any thought that he was pulling away again. It was grounding and safe, an anchor he needed to not float away. "For what it's worth though, I think you communicate just fine. You aren't scared to express your feelings through your words or actions, which I really admire about you, Blaine."

It was true. He can still feel the smallest tightness in his chest even if he has no reason to. Something about opening up and becoming vulnerable still felt like he was going into battle. Although he was much better at erasing the mask bit-by-bit over the years, there still was something holding him back from branching into the same area of emotional and mental intimacy where Blaine clearly seemed to do it effortlessly. At least to Kurt he did. Maybe it was envy, questioning his love for this man when he wasn't able to reach the same levels.

"I think the only way that we'll get better at this communication thing though, is if we do it more. Like have these deeper conversations, which is terrifying but it might twist some perspective from both ends on how our brains work differently. And how there's nothing wrong with that. Yeah?" Kurt tilts his head, unsure if he was still making sense or even getting across what he thought they could achieve from doing these talks more often. The panic was starting to rise in his chest as he realizes he might be putting Blaine on the spot and putting pressure into something that maybe didn't even need to happen and was just him making things up in his head again. "Or we don't have to do that! Maybe I just need to focus on fixing my communication myself first and then bring it to the table or something. Who knows."

Blaine could feel the tension in the air, could see it in Kurt's body language and the way he didn't seem ready to meet his eyes just yet. His own heartbeat sped up a little as he sat down, and while he tried desperately to ignore the way his mind started racing, it was impossible to push all the different scenarios running through his head to the back of his mind. Had he said something wrong? Had he come back too soon and did Kurt need some more time by himself? Was this the moment when he was going to suggest it might be better for Blaine to move out again, or worse, that they should break up entirely? Or —

The sound of Kurt's voice brought him back to reality. When Kurt finally spoke, Blaine let out a sigh of relief, and when his fiancé mentioned pineapple on pizza for a second time, he couldn't hold back the short, soft laugh that escaped his lips. "I'm sorry, it's just — it sounds so ridiculous," he said, biting his lower lip in an attempt to hold back his laughter, thumb brushing the back of Kurt's hand. It was amazing how such a small gesture, that gentle squeeze of Kurt's hand, could calm his nerves so easily.

"It's not weird," he told Kurt, as he smiled back at him and subconsciously shifted a little closer. Another deep breath before he continued to talk. "I can't say I've personally ever felt the need to pick a fight with you for the sole purpose of, well, picking a fight. Quite the contrary, actually. But that doesn't mean it's weird. I know you're definitely not the only one who tends to do that, and I've clearly got to work on my communication too, just in different ways," he answered honestly. "I'm just really glad that we're okay. I hate fighting with you, especially in this scorching heat." Then, after a beat. "We are okay, right?"

[talkwith-kvrthvmmel]

Do you like watching scary movies?

Not particularly, no. The last scary movie I saw was The Ring and I was too terrified to answer my own phone for a month.

[talkwith-kvrthvmmel]

I consider looking at it with flattery. If some gray face wants to dig down and get the dirt on what you do behind closed doors with your fiancé, just means they either need ideas for themselves in their own personal love life and need inspiration, or on the much sadder side of things - they just need something to use a tissue box to when it comes to dealing with their own personal loneliness. And there is no in between.

talkwith-kvrthvmmel At least it only mentioned candles, let's be grateful for that much.

I feel like it's only a matter of time before they start bringing up other things.

[talkwith-kvrthvmmel]

At least it only mentioned candles, let's be grateful for that much.

Do you own any exotic shaped candles that you need to hide if the parents come over?

Is that a euphemism? That's a euphemism, right? I think it's best not to answer this online, just in case said parents ever happen to stumble across this answer.

[talkwith-kvrthvmmel]

glee meme: ten relationships

kurt + mercedes

[talkwith-kvrthvmmel]

What is your most used emoji?

😌😒🫠🙃🍆

Technically the top five, but do with that as you will.

[talkwith-kvrthvmmel]

Friendly reminder that fashion rules aren’t real, you can mix as many patterns as you want, your metals don’t have to match, you can wear boots or sneakers with dresses, clothes don’t have gender, trends are fleeting, if you’re comfortable in an outfit then it does fit your body type, every single one of your material possessions will rot into dust someday and so will you, it literally does not matter what cloth you drape your living flesh in, you are going to die and there is so escape. If you feel good in something just put it on, take a deep breath and have some tea or something.

[talkwith-kvrthvmmel]

It's a thing now! And a record you'd break without a doubt. @talkwithblaine

You are so good for my skin sometimes. Giving my moisturizer a run for its money, I swear.

[talkwith-kvrthvmmel]

[talkwith-kvrthvmmel]

What Guinness Book of World Records record would you like to break?

Most unique brooch collection? Is that a thing? That should be a thing. I'm making that a thing.

[talkwith-kvrthvmmel]

You're so brave and strong for keeping secrets from Margaret like that. This calls for the good wine and cheese!

Can I just say, the weird spelling with extra letters for their kids just seems like extra work for no reason besides to look creative? But it's the most lazy and boring way to be creative, I swear. Brynleigh? What is that?! I'm adding to the judgement pool on that alone. I also don't understand why anyone would congratulate a dad for 'babysitting' when he's supposed to be the dad. The straights aren't okay, and it shows, and the more I hear about how ridiculous they are the more uncomfortable I get being around them. Is that weird? That's probably weird. But they're also weird for the two-faced drama they create for themselves because they have nothing going on and it shows. At least, out of everything that goes on at your job, it isn't boring! And I appreciate the read, so thank you. Is this drawing going on the fridge?

That would be the logical side of any argument! But in the fashion world? Logic doesn't always connect. It's about reputation in more than just what you make for yourself in talent. It's about making everyone else look good, especially your bosses. And if you don't look the part that represents your boss, then everything can go south and it's a total mess. High stress. And yet I love it. Can't get enough.

I would never put an umbrella on a hat! Absolutely not! I was thinking, it could be similar to sunglasses? When you step outside, they darken from the UV rays, keep you shaded. But once inside, they lighten again. Maybe they could also change colors!? Oh my god! I can picture it now! This is going to be huge! It sounds like a good idea, right? This isn't just me getting over enthused about something that's actually silly?

Keeping secrets from her is hard, as she loves gossip almost as much as you do, but for you, I'm willing to give it a try...

Oh, I don't even know where to start. The amount of gossip that comes out of these moms so early in the morning is astonishing. It's all still a bit hard to follow, as I'm still learning everyone's names, but let's see... Brynleigh's mom is currently being judged by everyone - and I mean everyone - because she had the audacity to bring snacks that weren't organic. Winifred's dad dropped her off today and got praised by all the moms for 'babysitting' his own daughter and as soon as he'd left the building, I was asked if I agreed that he had a 'hot dad bod' thing going on. And someone announced that Bentley's mom, who was late like she always is, got engaged and they all agreed it would never work out because 'their love languages are just too different'. Then Bentley and his mom chose that exact moment to walk into the room and they all pretended like her engagement was the best news they'd ever heard. And this all happened before 9am. Never a dull moment with these Upper East Side moms. I'm not sure about any crushes, although I did get a really nice drawing from Lacey today, so who knows...

Oh my god, that's wild. And it would obviously never happen to you. I mean, I know the fashion world is ruthless, but I feel like having a sunburn in this scorching heat isn't as big of an offence as a wrinkly dress.

Oh, how wonderful life is as the trophy fiancé of Vogue's brand-new talent. I can't wait. I can already picture the streets of New York City next summer, filled with people walking around with umbrellas. Just make sure they don't turn out like those silly-looking umbrella hats, because that would be pretty terrifying.

[talkwith-kvrthvmmel]

I see you haven't changed. You're still the definition of a boy that I've ever met. Unsure if this is a good thing or not.

Missed you? What gave you that impression?

Yeah, the armpit of America. You called it hot and smelly and that's where my brain went. You know you've missed me.