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Old warriors did not get old by accident; they got old by being wise, having the right knowledge, and being tough. Never underestimate an old man who has grown up in a rough profession or a rough environment. -Bodhi Sanders

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I like to think that thanks to Jason's death, Dick's hair became straighter and let it grew bacause he couldn't care less. He was trying to be a good brother to Tim tho, and Timmy was trying to also be a good brother but you know, he was doing the best a little kid could know.

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So the deal with Kukalaka ~

is that's not Julian's teddy bear. It's Jules's. Julian stitched up "his first patient" when he was five, well before he got his genetic modifications. And for someone who considers himself unnatural, has trouble reconciling his "realness" with the fact that he was "designed"... that is the most comforting thing in the entire world. Here he's got tangible proof, real tangible proof, with Jules' stitching still in the leg and everything, that his love of medicine, his love of what he does, is real.

(that bear's a talisman. Of course he's bringing it to DS9)

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supple-MENTAL am I right-

I love how fast Jon spiraled between seasons

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Do you ever wonder how Bashir felt about about the Wire given the parallel between them both receiving experimental brain surgery at the behest of their fathers (even before the father reveal Garak calls himself a "[son] of Tain")? Do you ever wonder if Bashir fought so hard to save Garak because he was trying subconsciously to save/bring back Jules? Do you ever wonder if the reason he needs to save Garak is so he can redeem himself? Like trying to wash your hands free of blood by washing someone else's.

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FINALLY!!!!!!!! TMAGP LENT ANIMATION HAS BEEN FREED FROM PROCRASTINATION HELL!!!!!!!!

This took way too long bc the malevolent brainrot got in the way so,,,,,, yeah I hope y’all enjoy!!! started this I mid-march so that’s why this has more first half of s1 vibes :))

also the YouTube link!!

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the types of leverage episodes

wow, check out this fucked up thing that's legal in the us

a character needs an arc, so this is about them and their stuggles (and also this fucked up thing that's legal in the us)

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"I will bathe you, build you a nest of my finest horse plushes, hunt down prey for your nourishment and if necessary regurgitate into the mouths of our young."

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Hello! I'd like to ask if you've seen the post with the screenshots that says Stolas inflicts his own torment by going with Stella's whims despite having more power and prestige than her. There is a rebuttal, of course, but someone else also added that the reason people think as the screenshot says is because the writers didn't put enough emphasis and reason on the hold Stella has over Stolas and his fear of her, as well as the fact that her apparent uninvolvement with Octavia makes his reason to stick with her seems very weak. They do put an intriguing essay on how the fear of Stella for Stolas could have stand out more.

Personally I think that he's probably desensitised and numb to her after with Paimon as well and the image of a nuclear family is a must for both society and daughter. Perhaps we'll have more answers in s3. What do you think?

Drink water regularly, may a good week come to you.

Hi! I haven't seen that post, no.

When I see posts arguing about the quality of the show's writing I almost always ignore them, because I'm not interested in discourse and I want my blog to be a place that's fun for me and others to scroll through. I don't want fandom wank and 'criticism of the show' on my blog because I go into fandom spares to have fun, not to get angry. So if I'd seen that post, I probably would've just sighed really hard and kept scrolling.

That being said, because this ask touches on a subject matter that is extremely personal to me, I'll bite and share my personal opinion, which is that the writing is perfectly executed exactly as it is. Helluva Boss is a show for a mature audience—it says so at the beginning of every episode. That doesn't just mean "hey, there's sex and drugs in these episodes". It also means, "hey, some heavy themes are going to be handled in this show, and we're not going to hold your hand and walk you through them. It's up to you to use your media literacy and critical thinking skills to pick up on the things we're going to show you".

And maybe it's because I'm an abuse survivor myself and I know exactly what it feels like to go through decades of abuse, and maybe other viewers' interpretation of Stolas' character is completely different, but... I personally had zero trouble picking up on Stolas' motivations, fears, and emotions, or on why he made each decision at each turn throughout the show.

I'll put the rest of my answer under a cut, because it's personal and rambly. But in short: yeah, I do agree with what you said at the end of your ask.

1. "He's more powerful and has a higher status than Stella, so he's inflicting his pain on himself by not standing up to her"

So there's this thing called learned helplessness, and, fun fact, it is heavily linked with PTSD and depression.

"(...) Learned helplessness occurs when someone repeatedly faces uncontrollable, stressful situations and does not exercise control when it becomes available. They have “learned” that they are helpless in that situation and no longer try to change it, even when change is possible." (source)

It's not about the power and capability to control the situation Stolas actually has. It's about the power and control he feels he has—which is none. Zero. He says this to us constantly. "Owl in a cage", "you have no choice", "my entire life's been written in stone, he taught me that I could choose".

He was told since he was a kid that his duties, his marriage, his life trajectory were non-negotiable. He never knew a life outside of his palace—his gilded jail. He doesn't know what we as the audience know—that's there's a whole world out there where he can build a better life for himself with people who actually love him—because he's been raised to be a pawn in a game much bigger than himself, and he knows it. I don't need (and don't want) the show to spoonfeed me this fact. It's spelled all over his character if you know how to see it.

2. "Stella's hold of Stolas and his fear of her aren't emphasised enough in the show"

Stella literally tries to hit him at the end of The Circus and looks shocked and taken aback when he grabs her wrist to stop her. I don't need them to show me Stella hitting Stolas 15 times in order to know she's been doing it.

He hugs himself and makes himself small, walking away to remove himself from the situation as quickly and quietly as possible, when Blitz starts yelling at him in The Full Moon. I don't need them to show me Stella yelling at Stolas 20 times to know she's been yelling at him for years. We've seen her yelling at him in Loo Loo Land, in The Circus and in Seeing Stars. We know it happens. We know it always has.

I also don't need them to tell me that repeated physical and verbal abuse causes a victim to become extremely afraid of their abuser and causes them to be triggered by anything and anyone that makes them feel unsafe, because I've lived it in my skin. And I know plenty of people who watch the show who are not abuse survivors, and they're also able to see that Stolas is behaving like any abuse victim exactly with zero support would act.

In the moment, he freezes and flees. He makes himself smaller. He gets away from the situation in any way he can. He "keeps the peace" to keep the abuse to a minimum, doing anything and everything to please the people around him because that's the only way he can feel some semblance of control. ("Yes, if that's what Blitzy wants" / "Do you like it when I talk to you dirty?" / just him sheltering Octavia from his suffering to be the perfect parent for her, and give her everything she could ever want and need, going as far as making promises he couldn't keep).

In the long run, he becomes hopeless and drowns in guilt. He assumes he probably deserves what's happening to him, and thinks it's his own fault that he's so affected by the abuse for being too weak to stand up for himself. He blames himself for not being good enough for the people around him ("I'll believe him, and not the voice that says I'm not enough"), and mentally berates himself for being a coward and a failure, and for not knowing how to put an end to his suffering. He turns to passive (sometimes active) suicidality because that's genuinely the only way he can see of getting back control over his own body and life. ("When I'm gone you'll be okay" / "I'll give my life to clean your slate" / "I don't care what they fucking do, I'm seeing Octavia" / "do it, pussy").

3. Stella's uninvolvement with Octavia makes Stolas' reason to stay with Stella seem very weak

I... Look. I can't be the only one who grew up in a broken family, and surrounded by plenty other broken families. Kids, especially small kids, can't rationalise that family relationships don't always work out and sometimes divorce is the best option for everyone involved. Especially not in this society we live in, where divorce/separation are seen as a failure, and children are (at least passively) taught that divorce is their fault.

Stolas knows all this. He doesn't want Via to feel like she's growing up in a broken house, which is what separating from Stella would accomplish. We also don't know if Stolas would've kept custody of Octavia had he divorced Stella when Via was little. But it's very likely he didn't want to risk leaving Via alone with Stella, even just half the time. Especially not when Octavia has been having nightmares and crying over the mere thought of being abandoned by Stolas. Divorcing Stella would very likely result in Octavia feeling abandoned by him.

I don't know, man. I feel like I don't even have the right words to reply to this point. I still remember being 8 and sensing that something was very wrong with my parents and feeling like it was my responsibility to fix it, or else my world would end. Stolas tried his best to protect Octavia from feeling this way, from feeling responsible for anything that happened between her parents. He just wanted her to be happy. The only way he could do that was by playing 'happy family' in front of her so she could grow up carefree. He tried his best to give her enough love that she wouldn't feel the absence of her mother's love. I really don't know what else to say to this.

If you want media to spoon-feed you its themes and hold your hand as it shows you what each character is going through, then... I don't know, man. Stick to media that does that. There's media out there that genuinely does this really well. Heartstopper, for example. The Hunger Games, in a way. But maybe think twice before diving into adult media meant for mature audiences and criticising it for wanting you to be a mature viewer. Maybe it's just not for you.

Anyway. I'm gonna drink water now, please drink some water too if you're reading this (included, but not limited to, the asker). Hope you all have a nice day ❤️

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you're my heart (inspo)

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there's an interesting moment in "sinsmas" that i think far too many people misunderstood.

it's this one.

Stolas is a sucker for romantic fantasies.

we know this from pretty early on. he referred to blitzo in fantastic romantic terms like "my knight in shining armor".

he crossed blitzo's boundaries again and again because he thought their relationship was more intimate than it actually was, and he was sure blitzo was on the same page.

and he's constantly shown consuming romantic media- romance novels, telenovelas and rom-coms.

and honestly? i was constantly surprised by how much the narrative didn't punish him for it. not to say he didn't experience heartbreak. not to say some illusions weren't shattered. but at no point was the narrative ever saying stolas was wrong for having those dreams.

no, not even in sinsmas. because you know what happens five minutes after stolas gets angry at himself for doing it all for a fantasy?

this.

blitzo, slaying a literal dragon with a literal sword to save stolas. it's a scene straight out of a fairytale. and just because subtlety is for losers they even call it out.

the narrative literally tells stolas, your fantasies weren't foolish. you were right to believe in them. they came true.

it's a reoccurring theme in a lot of hellaverse characters. because you know who else is a dreamer hanging on to impossibly grand fantasies?

this guy.

sure, they aren't romantic fantasies, but blitzo's business aspirations are not all that different in the level of grandness or delusion. the theme of blitzo aggrandizing himself as a boss and the success of his business have been present since the pilot. they've been hammered home several times, with him, much like stolas, steadfastly ignoring any bit of reality that doesn't settle with his fantasy.

will blitzo ever get to be the big boss of a circus business with clowns and horses? probably not. does blitzo make plenty of mistakes about the way he runs his business? of course, so many. does he have ridiculous notions about what being a boss means that he needs to unlearn? yes, definitely!

but despite everything, he pushes through. and slowly but surely, his business becomes more successful as time goes on.

charlie from "hazbin hotel" is actually another good example of that. she also has a ridiculous dream that no one believes in. she also has ridiculous notions inspired by that dream. and the narrative also rewards her for hanging on to it when no one else would believe in it but her.

the point that seems to repeat in those stories is that those fantasies are important. that the act of believing in them is important. it can inspire you. it can help you push through when the odds are stacked against you. it can provide you with the drive you need to achieve your goals.

if stolas hadn't clung on to his ridiculous romantic fantasies, he wouldn't have believed in what he and blitzo could (and did) eventually become. he wouldn't have persistently tried to reach blitzo for as long as he did, even after he realized blitzo views their relationship so differently from him. he wouldn't have jumped so readily at the chance of what they could be, and found the courage to break free from his miserable, abusive marriage. he wouldn't have let blitzo become his light, and he wouldn't have become blitzo's heart in turn.

and it's not that stolas' is completely blind to reality. he doesn't literally wants to live in a rom-com. it's actually spelled out for us in "apology tour".

stolas doesn't want to actually be chased in the rain every day, he just wants someone to show this level of care toward him, because no one ever has.

and he finally gets it. and i'm sorry to break this to you, if you're one of the people who seem to be chomping at the bits for the narrative to slap the dreams out of stolas until he gets over them, but he wouldn't have gotten all of this without his fantasies.

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Stolas's Subtle Growth in Sinsmas (Social Class Edition)

I sat down to write a post about Stolas's bitchy, out of touch reactions to "normal" hellborn society. I was going to praise the show for allowing him to struggle to adjust, to be imperfect and disoriented and repeatedly put his foot in his mouth without realizing it. And yeah, I stand by that. These moments are funny and in character and just fantastic (have a run-down below). But that's not the point of this post.

Something else about Stolas's behavior struck me as I grabbed screenshots. And it's that despite coming off at times as super insensitive about "poor" life, Stolas is really trying to make things easy for Blitz, so much that he's willing to be very uncomfortable. The meds are . . . arguably an example, but that's complicated (mental illness stigma might play a role too?), so instead let's look at Stolas's initial reaction to being uncomfortable with the food that Blitz prepared.

His reaction is disgust, BUT he really tries to eat the food and make the best of it.

He doesn't start listing off the fancy foods he's used to until Blitz outright asks. And yes, his list is kind of ridiculous, but it's his reality, and when he asks for rats, he's uncomfortable about making a direct request.

Then, when Blitz offers to go hunt rats in the alley for him, he's appropriately grateful. Even more, this is entirely Blitz's suggestion. Stolas doesn't ask him to go get him different food. He's willing to eat something "off-putting" even if it makes him very uncomfortable.

Stolas goes along with Blitz for every errand, and then goes to work with him because Blitz asks him to, even though he's exhausted, out of his element, off his meds, and missing his daughter.

He also answers the phone at I.M.P while crying because Blitz wants him to.

We even see him empathizing with Blitz's perspective AND DEFENDING HIM when the horrible Karen client insults I.M.P.

It gives, "ugh, they have to deal with people like you," and it had me cheering.

This is all to say that Stolas WAS marinating on some valuable lessons about social class while our boys were apart, whether consciously or not.

He's used to having his needs met and routines followed by a staff, but he's making an active effort not to treat Blitz like one of his butler imps, and is trying to keep from being a burden. Arguably to a fault, if his choice to not bring up the meds to Blitz has to do with this.

Owl boi is trying so hard! And that makes Blitz's easy compassion more understandable too. He's not just indebted because Stolas saved his life. He's not just trying to win over the guy he loves who he pushed away. He also doesn't see Stolas's behavior regarding the social class stuff as very insulting. He sees Stolas trying to adjust but struggling hard. Of course he's going to do everything he can to help and keep his snark to a minimum.

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There most be some fangirls in Gotham ship Bruce Wayne/Batman.

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You see how I do my makeup for the Bridge? Very demure. Very mindful. I don't come to the Bridge with a green-cut crease. I don't look like a clown when I go to the Bridge. I don't do too much. I'm very mindful while I'm on the Bridge. Do you see how I look very presentable? The way I went to the Academy is the way I go to the Bridge. A lot of you girls go to the Academy looking like Marge Simpson and go to the Bridge looking like Patty and Selma. Not demure. I'm very modest. I'm very mindful

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did i tell u guys i got into an argument on twitter bc i said foxes are dogs and someone tried to bring up their actual fuckin. classification or whatever and i just said “foxes are dogs cause they are fluffye” and they kept arguing with me. the entire time i was like “you will not survive the immigration to tumblr you are lucky we are not there right now”

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Does tumblr know about the animation union yaoi yet

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love the word lackluster. well it sucks because it’s not shiny