tariancadman - Tumblr blog

[tariancadman]

dorian: i love you

chaol: how many people have you told that to??

dorian: everyone

chaol: EVERYONE??

dorian: yeah, i tell everyone i love you

[tariancadman]

How could we ever just be friends?

Once again I have written a shitty fanfiction. You're welcome.

Read on Ao3

Summary:  The sound of the rain greeted him as well as a soaked Chaol. Dorian took another deep breath.

“Look Chaol, whatever you’re going to say, I just want you to know I’m sorry-”

“Do you want to dance with me?” Chaol interrupted. 

Dorian’s mind simply stopped. He was like the human version of the loading symbol. He opened and closed his mouth like a fish out of water before managing a broken, “What?”

“Do you want to dance with me?” Chaol asked again. There was an odd look on Chaol’s face, something like hope. Dorian gazed into his brown eyes and remembered the text he had sent. The part where he’d mentioned his gorgeous eyes, the ones he felt like he was being sucked into every time he looked at them. 

***

The rain beat on the windows violently, as it had been for the last few hours. The sound of it was oddly relaxing. Even the thunder that seemed to shake the entire house was nice in a way.

Dorian had been sitting in his room on the windowsill since the rain had started. It had proved pleasant background noise while he finished his homework. He had plugged his earbuds into his phone, played music from one of his playlists, and finished most of the homework he had.

About an hour ago now, Dorian’s father had sent a maid up to tell him the old man had left the house and would be back later tonight. Dorian had thanked the woman and settled back into his work. The house had quieted after his father had left, most people taking his absence as a chance to sit for a while and rest. His father would have wanted him to go tell the people to get back to work, but he couldn’t care less what they did. They deserved a break anyway after working for his father for so long.

Dorian sighed, pulling his earbuds out and packing his notebooks, pencil case, computer, and other things into his backpack and placing it by his bedroom door. Just then, he received a text.

Aelin: Sorry Dorian, I don’t think we can hang out today. My dad is all worked up about the storm and doesn’t want me to leave the house until it’s over :(

Dorian quickly texted her back saying it was all okay, that they could hang out next weekend instead. He couldn’t help the slight disappointment he felt though. They’d been meant to binge Heartstopper while he moped over Chaol, and Aelin held him while he cried.

Dorian jumped onto his bed, thinking about what he could do with the new free time he had. Immediately he thought of face timing Chaol, but that wasn’t a good idea. Last week, Dorian had been drunk and sent Chaol a text about how in love with him he was. When he had woken up in the morning, there had been a bunch of texts and missed phone calls from Chaol saying they needed to talk. Dorian had been avoiding him since, not wanting to hear Chaol say he didn’t want to be friends anymore and that he had never wanted Dorian like that.

Dorian sat back up and ran a hand through his hair before an idea popped into his head. Grabbing his phone, Dorian ran down the stairs and into the kitchen.

“Why hello there, boy,” Thalia said from where she sat on a barstool. “Is there something you’d like for me to make for you?”

Thalia was his family’s cook. She had been around for decades now and was the only person who dared to speak ill of Dorian’s father openly. Dorian thought of her almost as a grandmother. She’d always been nice to him, giving him extra sweets when he was younger and talking to him about school when his parents ignored him.

“Not today, Thalia. If it’s okay, though, I’d like to use the kitchen to bake something.”

Thalia smiled and slid off the barstool and hobbled over to the door. “Don’t let me stop you, sweetheart.”

The door shut behind Thalia and Dorian quickly went to work, grabbing everything he needed.

***

Dorian sat at the kitchen island while he waited for the last batch of cookies to finish cooking. The smell of fresh cookies had engulfed the room, making Dorian’s stomach rumble. He was forcing himself to wait for them to cool off enough so that he didn’t burn his mouth when he took a bite of one.

The oven beeped, signaling there was only a minute left on the timer just as a young maid, the same one who had told him his father was leaving earlier, walked into the room. She wore an apron over a nice pair of black slacks and a white shirt. Her dark curls were pulled back into a tight ponytail on the top of her head, and Dorian thought he could see some sparkle on her eyelids.

“Hello Sir. There is a man at the door asking to see you. He says he’s your friend. Would you like for me to let him in?” The woman said, her voice soft.

Dorian couldn’t hide his surprise. The calls and text messages from Chaol had stopped yesterday, and he’d thought that would be the end of that. He’d cried for hours, knowing he had finally fucked up their friendship in an unfixable way.

The woman stood there waiting for his answer, but Dorian was still a little shocked that Chaol was here and couldn’t even tell her not to call him sir. The timer on the oven decided right then was the best time to go off and Dorian went to grab the oven mitts, moving on autopilot, but before he could, the woman grabbed his hands.

“Go talk to your friend sir, I’ll deal with your cookies.” She was smiling now, as if she knew something he didn’t.

“I-um-Thank you. I’m going to go, uh, do that.” Dorian managed. “Thank you, ma’am, very much,” He yelled as he ran through the halls towards the front door.

As he neared the closed door and saw Chaol’s silhouette through the glass, his stomach turned over. Maybe Chaol had come over here to yell at him or to give him back something he’d left at Chaol’s place. Dorian pushed the nerves down and took and deep breath, opening the door.

The sound of the rain greeted him as well as a soaked Chaol. Dorian took another deep breath.

“Look Chaol, whatever you’re going to say, I just want you to know I’m sorry-”

“Do you want to dance with me?” Chaol interrupted.

Dorian’s mind simply stopped. He was like the human version of the loading symbol. He opened and closed his mouth like a fish out of water before managing a broken, “What?”

“Do you want to dance with me?” Chaol asked again. There was an odd look on Chaol’s face, something like hope. Dorian gazed into his brown eyes and remembered the text he had sent. The part where he’d mentioned his gorgeous eyes, the ones he felt like he was being sucked into every time he looked at them.

Dorian, not trusting himself to speak, nodded his head and gestured to the coat closet. Chaol smiled and nodded, understanding what he was trying to convey. He always did that, understood Dorian without even needing to try. It was aggravating.

Dorian moved on autopilot once again, grabbing his shoes and tying them quickly. When he stood up and moved back into the doorway, his eyes met with Chaol’s outstretched hand. Dorian took hold of it, Chaol pulling him out of the house and reaching behind Dorian to close the door.

Dorian closed his eyes for a moment, inhaling the scent of Chaol when he was so close to him and savoring the feeling of their chests pressed together. Chaol’s hand tightened its hold and then he pulled him down the steps into the pouring rain.

The cold soaked through his clothes in seconds, chilling him to the bone, but Chaol didn’t stop moving, instead he pulled him into the garden and let go of Dorian’s hand. Chaol reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone, pressing a button before tucking it back into the pocket.

“Until I Found You” by Stephen Sanchez and Em Beihold started played through speakers Dorian couldn’t see. Chaol reached out his hand again, looking slightly nervous now. His wet shirt clung to his body, and Dorian wanted to trail his fingers along his muscles, but he reminded himself he couldn’t.

Cautiously, Dorian grabbed Chaol’s hand, and Chaol pulled him in close. One of Chaol’s hands went around his waist and the other stayed holding his hand. Chaol moved them into a dance that was incredibly romantic.

“You told me once a few years ago that the most romantic thing you could think of was dancing in the rain,” Chaol whispered in Dorian’s ear. Dorian’s heart raced as he realized what Chaol was implying and at the thought that Chaol had paid attention to something so small.

Chaol spun him and pulled him back in, pressing himself to him as tightly as possible. Dorian looked up slightly and brought the hand he had rested on Chaol’s shoulder to his face, gently cupping it and running his thumb along his cheekbone. Chaol shuddered, his face looking absolutely wrecked as he closed his eyes.

Dorian smiled softly. “You also remembered my favorite song.”

“Yes,” Chaol whispered. “I’ve wanted to speak with you.” Chaol opened his eyes and they stilled, staring into each other’s souls.

Dorian swallowed, letting himself hope. He watched as Chaol’s Adam’s apple bobbed and as his tongue came out to wet his lips. Dorian forgot about the rain causing him to shiver, focused solely on Chaol.

“I read your text, and at first, I simply stared at it. I couldn’t believe what I had read, I thought, he must be pranking me, but then you didn’t answer any of the messages I sent you and I knew it was real, that you were panicking because you thought I would be mad with you. I have been trying to contact you so I could tell you that you are not alone in your feelings.” Chaol pressed Dorian tighter into him.

“I love you, Dorian. Your eyes sparkle when you are happy and your laugh is beautiful and you me feel dumb and I love it. I have loved you ever since we were children and I want to spend every moment of every day with you. I have spent the last years thinking that I was destined to be alone forever because I had found my soulmate, but he did not see me as his.” When Chaol finishes, he is panting.

Dorian smiles and then pulls away from Chaol to fall over laughing. Chaol stands there surprised only to realize how stupid this whole situation is and starts laughing as well.

Dorian stands back up, grabbing Chaol’s face in his hands and resting their foreheads together. “I can’t believe we have been desperately in love with each other this entire time and not noticed it. We are possibly the most oblivious people ever.”

Chaol chuckles and stares into Dorian’s eyes as he says, “Did my romantic gesture live up to your expectations?”

Dorian’s smile grows. “Yes, 100 times yes. Now shut up and kiss me.”

Chaol pulls him in close and suddenly spins Dorian away from him before leaning him over like in the movies and presses his mouth to Dorians. When they pull away from each other, both out of breath, Dorian says softly, “Would you like to eat fresh cookies with me and cuddle in front of the fire, wishing we hadn’t spent so much time in the rain?”

Chaol laughs, the sound loud and uninhibited. “Of course I would, Dorian.”

[tariancadman]

Baking Pies And Kissing Your Best Friend

This story is very chaotic and messy, I wrote it at 12 AM and it sucks so please withhold your judgement.

Read on Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/36733618

"So you're telling me you promised Aelin we would make 5 pies for this party of hers?" Chaol asked, barely disguising his anger.

I winced and smiled nervously. “I was being nice!” 

Chaol crossed his arms and leaned back against the counter. "How can someone so smart be so dumb?" He asked himself incredulously.

"Look, Chaol, please help me. I do not know how to bake and these pies need to be done by tomorrow afternoon! Come on, do it for me?" I looked at Chaol with the best puppy dog eyes I could manage and stuck my bottom lip out. 

Chaol squeezed his eyes shut and brought a hand to his face, tiredly rubbing his forehead. He opened his eyes for a moment, catching my gaze, and sighed. "Alright," he conceded, "I'll help you. But you owe me one!" 

I grinned, walking to him and grabbing his face in my hands, placing a big kiss on his cheek. "You're the best Chaol, I'll repay you." 

His face reddened at my actions, which only made my grin grow. He was always so cute when he blushed.

--------------------

3 hours of mixing, measuring and whatever else you do while baking later, I sat on the counter in the kitchen. Chaol had long since told me I could touch nothing because apparently I was the worst baker he had ever met.

I had left him to do things how he wanted though, seeing as I still have no clue how to bake. I took up a spot on the other side of the kitchen, where I wouldn't be in his way, and we talked aimlessly. 

First about our hectic week, then about the new marvel movie that had just come out and how we should see it together and then, what we are talking about now, the book I am currently reading. 

"So basically, the girl, the one this guy had been falling in love with, was actually a ghost all along!"

Chaol carefully set the next pie in the oven. "How did it take him so long to realize that the signs were right in front of him the entire time?" He wiped his hands on the apron I had gotten for shits and giggles a few years ago.

"You only knew it was coming because I told you everything that was happening in chronological order," I pointed out. "Besides, it is actually very common for people to miss things that are right in front of them." Case in point, you, Chaol.

“I don't know. I think I could've seen it coming,” Chaol responded. Ha, that was hilarious, because I don’t think he would’ve seen it coming if I had spelt it out for him.

"Whatever you say." I pulled out my phone, opening Instagram to see if any of my friends had posted recently.

"Why'd you say it like that?" He asked, turning to face me. His soft honey brown skin dusted with flour, a smear of one filling on his cheek. It all made his normally slightly terrifying appearance much less so.

I fought the urge to roll my eyes. I had been in a fake relationship with Manon for months and he had yet to notice. He had also yet to notice that I had been in love with him since childhood. It wasn't his fault either, really, but I had believed he would've found out about the whole Manon thing a lot sooner.

I had promised not to tell anyone about it, including him, but if he found out about it himself, everything would've been fine. But no, he had to be so fucking dense.

"Dorian? Is everything alright?" I looked up, surprised to see and hear Chaol so close to me. Up close, I could see the bits of gold in his eyes, and the way he ran his tongue over his lip.

Suddenly, the urge to kiss him overwhelmed me, and unfortunately for me, I've never been all that good at controlling my urges.

So I leant forward and kissed him. It was like the gods had sent me to some sort of heaven. The feeling of his soft lips, of his jaw beneath the hand I had placed on him. 

And then I panicked, because what if he didn't have any feelings for me? What if I had just completely ruined our friendship? 

But before any of those thoughts could go very far, Chaol began kissing me back. Hesitantly, he reached up and lay his hand over mine. The feeling of his skin against my own sent sparks through me. I opened my legs so he could stand in between them, lightly nipping his bottom lip and slipping my tongue in his mouth.

Gods, it was fucking amazing to me here, with my tongue, my mother fucking TONGUE in CHAOL’s, the man I’ve been in love with forever, mouth. His mouth moved against mine, and his other hand came up to rest on my chest. 

I moved my other hand into his silky brown hair that had grown out over the last few months. Abruptly, Chaol pushed me away, stumbling out of my grasp and into the kitchen island. 

He looked shocked, as if he couldn’t believe he had just kissed me. The hand that had been on mine shakily brushed against his lips, which were parted, allowing him to draw in quick pants of air. 

I wasn’t doing any better, my eyes dark and panting, trying to catch my breath and my mine, which had apparently decided it had better things to do than help me figure out what the fuck was going on!

A storm of emotions crossed Chaol’s face, too quickly for de to decipher even one of them. 

“What the fuck Dorian.” It wasn't a question, but a demand. Confusion overtook me. He had kissed me back, so why was he so mad? My brain was still offline, making figuring anything out 100 times more difficult.

Chaol turned away from me, his hands balling into fists so tight his knuckles turned white on the marble countertop. Not being able to see his face made things even more difficult than they already were. 

“Why would you-why would you kiss me? You have a gods damn girlfriend!” his voice came out shaky and broken, and suddenly everything clicked.

“Chaol,” I whispered. I jumped off the counter and ambled over to him. I didn’t dare touch him, as I was too afraid to scare him away before I had the chance to explain. 

“Chaol, let me explain.”

Chaol didn’t move, didn’t make a single sound. 

“Manon and I are in a fake relationship. And I kissed you because I like you as a lot more than a friend.” 

Silence. I held my breath. Deathly slow, Chaol turned around. I met the same beautiful face that had been my rock since childhood. Our eyes locked, and he searched mine, probably for any sign I was lying. 

The corners of Chaol’s lips turned upwards. “You know, I don’t think I’d see it coming anymore.” 

I let out the breath and smiled. “Does that mean you’d like to do a repeat of before, just without the angry confusion?” I asked.

“I would, but we have a lot to talk about first, I think.” I nodded. He was right, after all.

“Of course. Maybe while we finish these pies?” 

Chaol seemed to snap out of our little world and remember what we had been trying to do before. “You mean while I finish these pies?” he teased, his all too attractive lips shifting into a smile.

I chuckled. Hopefully, my stupidity would lead to something I’d never even let myself dream out about.