tashaiseverseeing1

[tashaiseverseeing1]

May I request the northern Luzon giant cloud rat? These rodents can get as large as 50 cm, and I need more people to know about them.

Of course!

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[tashaiseverseeing1]

Guess who’s never beating the “cutie patootie” allegations? It’s the raccoon dog (Nyctereutes procyonoides)! It can be found in parts of northern Europe and Asia. In the colder areas of its range, this species hibernates through the winter. To prepare for this long rest, individuals gorge themselves with food—including insects, fruit, and crustaceans. A raccoon dog can gain up to 50 percent of its weight during this process, and at its peak, an individual can weigh up to 22 lbs (10 kg). 

Photo: Zweer de Bruin, CC0 1.0, Wikimedia Commons

[tashaiseverseeing1]

Ami when I drop her in the YKMETverse/j

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My vampires CAN walk into the sunlight but doing so would reveal what they would look like if they aged normally

Younger vampires don’t have much to worry about but older vamps have reason to avoid sunlight as they age. They are still immortal, but their aged, sunlit selves are significantly weaker than their non-sunlit forms. Vamps over 100 years old run the risk of crumpling over, fully immobile, but still conscious

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for anyone with ykmet ocs :3

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[tashaiseverseeing1]

Where We Stop, Horror Still Continues: But When Should We Start?

This is an essay with horror, sex, & romance. But at it's core, it's not about where we fall in all three. Because falling means that you have a straight destination, the guarantee of understanding & knowing where you're going. There are those of us staring at the edge. What is behind us is the silence, emptiness. The comforting confinement of the mundane that cradles us with a familiar & worn embrace. Yet when we look at the edge, we feel something new. It's an ugly feeling, leaving you gasping for breath. Making your stomach feel like its being torn & spun in every direction. It's as horrible as it is exciting, it doesn't just induce anxiety. There's an excitement. You've gotten a taste of the unfamiliar & now you're left reaching for more.

The thrill is something many are ashamed of feeling. Maybe someone else has stood at that edge before, when you tell them about it, they make it clear to you that they're happy to be safe & away from the edge. That is was such a nauseating feeling that they couldn't bear to do it again. That they looked down & instantly hated what they saw, what could've happened. Somehow this shared experience has left you even more alone. You're supposed to like your life away from the edge. Where the ground is ever solid on your feet, no bumps or lumps in sight. You've never so much as tumbled. Yet when you just looked at that edge? It was the most amazingly awful feeling you have ever felt.

You're convinced something is wrong with you, so you go online & find that there are so many just like you. That behind this screen there are people who love not just standing at the very edge, but sometimes jumping off. Or maybe they climb up further heights. Finally, just finally, you find more people that are like you. A community where you hide to show your true self. This is the case for many who find themselves heavily aroused by horror. Finding themselves gushing over things that made their stomach churn with more than just the romance. Well, romance for them, for any other person it would just be sickening. Horror is a genre that explores the terrors of our conventions; it is willing to stare taboo in its face & charge at it. Sexuality is taboo, but it is considered the charge in romance. Being desired is the charge of romance, yet wanting to desired is shameful. Why? Because to want it means a direct acknowledgement of sex. The expression of sexuality is something that leaves us exposed, it leaves the impression that we are violating the "rule" of something that should happen naturally without direct intent.

Horror allows us to feel wanted without feeling exposed, maintaining our "innocence" through brutality. It leaves an ironically sweet taste in someone's mouth. We are able to finally explore horrific things that are never spoken about, even known of, to give a name to the unacknowledged. Horror is built off taboo, it reaches for it through its every branch & stem even "typical" horror leaves us in shock with where it is willing to go. Sexuality, romance, & longing is horror. Existing strictly in a binary where people are left cutting themselves into pieces to fit through. Yet with horrorporn/romance we get to explore the uglier, truthful sides of our most valued & yet sneered at ideals. We accept that inherently we exist within a space that welcomes all explorations of its ugliest insides.

But even then, enough is enough. We all know that fiction is not indicative of reality, but when one ventures so far with only the thrill of fear in mind, we fail to realize how mindlessly chasing our highs grinds down on our critical thinking. Such is the case for Fangdokja. She ultimately wrote things like literal noncon, murder, & other horrific things as horrorporn/romance, but drew her line at writing LGBTQ+ people, opting also to write for only pale, skinny readers in mind. She also writes these abusive versions of characters because they remind her of her real life husband who she claims she researches yanderes on for, as well as for Jesus. In her eyes, it was okay to express this form of sexuality so long as it never included queer people. So long as it only kept pale thin people as the center. Add to that her longing to write conversion therapy, racism, concentration camps, & CSAM in her writing & we have to force ourselves to realize that even in the limitless field of horror we still much approach this territory with respect & caution.

In her words, "nothing is sacred in fiction." As someone who is an asexual lesbian, to say the existing sexual/romantic norms are not meant to include me is a truthful understatement. So my understanding/feelings are not meant to be the exact center of this conversation. But with confidence I can say that when you project your real life prejudices into your writing & begin to solely see horrorporn/romance as something that should be escalated for the sake of thrill/titillation without any thought you disregard the fact that it is a branch of horror that should be concerning. Real life crimes against humanity should not be seen as indulgences as you proceed to actively discriminate against people with your beliefs that you put aside to write for your own sexual deviance. Horror, no matter in what form, is not meant to declare what is sacred. It still demands that you critically think however, & its exploration into the taboo is not permissive of exploitation of real world atrocities for the sake of getting off.

You cannot attempt to escape the sexual/romantic binaries of our society while imposing them in the real world. Not while getting sexually aroused by the marginalization of communities you use your work to discriminate against.

You can love horror, get off on it, or gush over it like you would to any romcom. But do not willingly sacrifice your critical thinking. Do not stop analyzing the works you write or interact with. Otherwise, the purpose of horror is lost.

[tashaiseverseeing1]

all that could’ve been.

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99 nights in the Forest is such a funny game to play with people. Like how are you already dead at day 4. Can you please stop wandering off. Now we have to be neglecting our fire to be looking for bandages for your sorry ass that doesn't want to join us and have a food/fuel storage.

Worse part is that they don't even at least bring any old rusted stuff for bolts 😤

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"the deer is hungry tonight" bitch me too, and you know wtf im doing about it??? making fucking stew

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sheepish is a really funny word. fuck im so nervous (turns into this)

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we are the daughters of the women you couldn’t sell to one direction

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It's fun reading writers who clearly grew up in suburban/urban environments as someone who grew up on a farm because they're always like "oh it was so creepy, woods at night, eerily breathtaking, something was living in there..." and it's like yeah that'll be the deer.

[tashaiseverseeing1]

How I feel reading smut while being scared of intimacy in real life